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Arctic Monkeys, Neil LaBute, Antisocial on abortion, where to join the big antiwar march, Stop Smiling and second-city syndrome, and more CHICAGO’S FREE WEEKLY | THIS ISSUE IN FOUR SECTIONS FRIDAY, MARCH 17, 2006 | VOLUME 35, NUMBER 25 Have Game, Will Travel Where do you go when the NBA doesn’t want you? The Election Why is it so boring? p 4 Rey Colon’s odd referendum p 8 The trouble with how judges get elected p 12 Saint Patrick’s Day Irish eats Section 2 Irish everything Section 3

SectionOne - chicagoreader.com · The Philippine Cup begins in mid-March and is closed to non-Filipinos. Fiesta ... EDSA, Manila’s smoggy, often ... The first game of the season

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Arc tic M

onk ey s, Neil L

aBute, A

ntisocial on abor tion, where to join the

big antiwar m

arch, Stop Smilin

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Have

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Where

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NBA

doesn’twantyou?

TheElection

Why

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soboring?

p 4

Rey

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Thetrouble

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how

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electedp 12

SaintP

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Irisheverything

Section 3

March 17, 2006

Section One Letters 3ColumnsHot Type 4Wake me when the election’s over.

The Straight Dope 5The iceman cometh.

The Works 8Rey Colon’s TIF referendum, Daley stiffs Stroger, and more

Chicago Antisocial 10What are our abortion rights anyway?

Our Town 12Is our judicial election system repaired, or justfixed? Also: Stop Smiling posits a kinder, gentlerjournalism, and an antiwar organizer finallyfigures out how to beat the permit process.

ReviewsMovies 26Ask the Dust and Find Me Guilty

Music 28Arctic Monkeys

Art 30Three shows at the Chicago Cultural Center

Theater 32David Mamet’s A Life in the Theatre, Neil LaBute’s Autobahn

PlusFree Shit 15How to crash wine time at your finer hotelsWhat Are You Wearing? 16Clothing and jewelry designer CastroInk Well 35This week’s crossword: Between Jobs

By Rafe Bartholomew

Q uemont Greer finished his college basket-ball career with the DePaul UniversityBlue Demons last March thinking he had

a bright future. The six-foot-six, 240-pound for-ward was the second player in school history toearn first-team all-Conference USA honors. Hissenior year scoring average of 18.3 points pergame was the second highest in the conference,and he’s the only player ever to be namedConference USA player of the week three timesin a row. He was one of 64 college seniors invitedto take part in the Portsmouth InvitationalTournament, one of the NBA’s two pre-draftcamps, where he’d have the chance to play infront of scouts from around the league.

His hopes grew dimmer as summerapproached. Though Greer put up decent num-bers at Portsmouth in April, and his team wonthe tournament, he wasn’t invited to the NBA’sbigger and more important Chicago camp inJune. Draft night came and went on June 28,and Greer wasn’t among the 60 players selected.He tried to work his way into the league as anundrafted free agent, playing in summer leaguesand even practicing once with the SacramentoKings, but he was never offered a contract.

With the NBA no longer in his sights, Greerasked his agent, Bill Neff, to find him a job over-seas. Greer said he “didn’t have a lot of options”at the time, and told Neff to “pick and choose thebest situation.” In early September Neff calledwith an offer: Greer could take a roster spot withthe Red Bull Barakos, one of nine teams in thePhilippine Basketball Association. His monthlysalary of $12,000 would be a pittance comparedto the riches of the NBA. Instead of state-of-the-art sports arenas with luxury suites, he wouldplay in the Cuneta Astrodome, a crumblingturquoise eyesore that overlooks Manila Bay.He’d face teams with absurd, corporate-spon-sored names: the Purefoods Chunkee Giants, theSan Miguel Beermen, the Santa Lucia Realtors.

A year in the PBA consists of two four-monthseasons. During the Fiesta Conference, whichruns from October to mid-February, each team isallowed one foreign player, who can be no tallerthan six-foot-six. The Philippine Cup begins inmid-March and is closed to non-Filipinos. FiestaConference imports are almost always from theUnited States, and while they’re the best playerson their PBA teams, they have less job securitythan their teammates. They’re given no morethan three games to prove their worth and arecontinued on page 22Quemont Greer playing for the Red Bull Barakos

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Have Game, Will TravelQuemont Greer was a star at DePaul, but the NBA passed him over.

So he took the first job he was offered: playing ball in the Philippines.

22 CHICAGO READER | MARCH 17, 2006 | SECTION ONE

referred to by PBA coaches andbroadcasters in terms usuallyreserved for used cars andwashing machines: one bad nightcan be enough to convince a teamthat they’ve bought a lemon.When that happens the teamswaps the player like a flat tire.

Of the hundreds of Americanplayers who have played in thePBA since the early 1980s, only ahandful went on to play in theNBA. Traffic between the twoleagues more often moves in theopposite direction, with formerNBA players coming to thePhilippines in the twilight oftheir careers for a paid vacationor a chance to stay in shape forone last shot at the big time. Themost recent former NBA playerto take the walk of shame alongthe Pacific Rim was Darvin Ham,last seen in 2005 with theDetroit Pistons, who joined theTalk N Text Phone Pals for threeplayoff games in January. FormerBulls Dickey Simpkins and ScottBurrell are also members of theNBA-to-PBA fraternity.

Size is the biggest reason Greerwasn’t selected in the 2005 NBAdraft. He’s a classic tweener, aplayer whose size and skills leavethem stuck between positions.With his broad, bullish physiqueand soft shooting touch near thebasket, he plays like a power for-ward, but he’s got the height of ashooting guard or small forward,and NBA teams didn’t want torisk finding out he couldn’t scoreon seven-foot centers. “I don’t

think he was ever consideredmuch of a prospect,” saysJonathan Givony, president ofDraft Express, a Web site thatcontains hundreds of scoutingreports on potential NBAplayers. “If there’s one type of guyyou can find the most comingout of college, it’s the undersize

power forward, and their trackrecord is terrible.” Of courseGreer disagrees with the scouts.“Some people say I’m not tallenough,” he says. “I don’t thinkthat should have been a factor. Ifyou can play, you can play.”

Greer knew that in thePhilippines he had an opportu-nity to prove himself. But he alsoknew there would be constantpressure throughout the season:any lapse in his scoring or effort,or even a simple losing streak,could prompt Red Bull to replacehim. If that happened, Greerwould be back at square one.He’d fly home to Milwaukee or toSacramento, where he trainedwith other unsigned players lastsummer. He would try to stay inshape and wait for another job,possibly in an American minorleague or elsewhere abroad. ForGreer and the hundreds of otherAmericans who play as hiredguns around the world, it’s hardto predict where your drop-stepor turnaround jump shot willtake you next.

The Philippines has been crazyfor basketball for at least 70

years. In a country with morethan 7,000 islands and 170 dis-tinct languages, it’s one of thefew things nearly everyone has incommon. Pristine outdoor courtswith expensive fiberglass back-boards and overhead lights, builtby NGOs and religious groups,rise out of the rubble of some ofManila’s most run-down slums.Filipinos of all ages can proudly

name members of the 1936national team that placed fifth inthe Olympics and the bronze-medal team from the 1954 WorldChampionships. The PBA,founded in 1975, was the firstprofessional basketball league inAsia, and today its games drawthousands of fans: families,

groupies, transvestites, and eld-erly women all come together tocheer for players and taunt ref-erees. At college games brawlserupt between high-ranking gov-ernment officials and assortedtycoons who are among thealumni in the stands.

Greer landed at Ninoy AquinoInternational Airport well pastmidnight on September 19 withhis girlfriend of nine years,Sherita Sanders. A Red Bullassistant coach and company

driver picked the couple up andtook them to their new home: theHoliday Inn Galleria Suites inManila. On the ride Greer sawFilipinos eating barbecue outsidedimly lit karaoke lounges alongEDSA, Manila’s smoggy, oftenclogged main traffic artery. “I waslike, this is something different,”

he says. “This is something odd.”He got to sleep around three or

four, then reported for his firstpractice at nine the followingmorning. Red Bull’s practices areheld at RFM Gym, a stuffysweatbox without air-condi-tioning where players are usuallydrenched before the end ofwarm-ups. The team was alreadyhalfway through their three-weekpreseason. The managers, havingseen video of Greer’s collegegames and checked out his repu-tation as a scoring machine withscouts, were excited about theiryoung import. Head coach YengGuiao expected Greer’s scoringaverage at DePaul would translateto between 25 and 30 points pergame in the PBA. Greer’s dutieswould also include defending theother teams’ best players, aver-aging at least ten rebounds agame, and acting as a team leader.

The first game of the seasonwas less than two weeks away,which didn’t leave Greer muchtime to earn his teammates’ trustand respect. The PBA’s 16-gameregular season is too short, how-ever, for teams to wait for localplayers to jell with mercurial for-eign stars who prefer to lead byexample. Guiao said he prefersimports with take-charge person-

alities and wished that the mild-mannered Greer could be “morepassionate, more emotional,more vocal.” Instead Greer, whosays he’s never been a “vocal typeof leader,” spent most of his timein between drills waiting aloneon the sideline. Sometimes he’dbring a folding chair and have atrainer massage his calves andthighs. He rarely challenged histeammates to play harder.

“You want him to get angry,”Guiao said. “You want him toshout at his teammates. Thatactually helps teams.” But Greerfelt apprehensive aboutdeclaring himself top dog whenhe still couldn’t remember histeammates’ first names. “I wasnervous because I didn’t knowwhat to expect from them orhow they were gonna reacttowards me,” Greer said. “A lotof these guys been playing onthis team for more than three orfour years, and you just wantme to come in and be a leader?How is that possible?”

Red Bull’s players seemedcapable of dealing with theirtight-lipped star. If an attemptedentry pass to Greer was stolen, histeammates would ask Greer whatsort of pass he wanted and where

Greer

Greer with his hands on his hips

Imports are referred to by PBA coaches and broadcasters in terms usually reservedfor used cars and washing machines: one bad night can be enough to convince a team that they’ve bought a lemon.

continued from page 1

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24 CHICAGO READER | MARCH 17, 2006 | SECTION ONE

to throw it next. When they set upon defense, the players looked toGreer to know where on the courtthey needed to be. “They knowI’m not a real talkative person,”Greer explained. “They kind ofwatch and look at how I’mreacting to certain things, andthen they react to that.”

Greer’s individual play at thestart of the season was spectac-ular. In his first game he scored37 points and collected 15rebounds. He topped that per-formance with 40 points, 13rebounds, and four blocks in thesecond game, a one-point winover the Alaska Aces that Greersealed in the closing seconds witha dunk over opposing importArtemus McClary. But it was aone-man show. Greer took 63shots in the first two games andscored nearly half of the team’scombined 153 points, but hadonly four assists. In the fourthgame, an 84-77 win over the Air21 Express attended by morethan 12,000 fans, he scored acomparatively subdued 25 pointswhile his teammates played alarger role. Afterward Guiao saidthe team was “trying to veer awayfrom our import trying to score40 points but with little contribu-tion from our locals.”

Six games into the season, RedBull’s 4-2 record was among thebest in the league. Greer wasaveraging more than 30 points agame and was the league’sleading scorer. He was playing sowell that concerns about hisability to lead the team were for-gotten. The coaches believed theteam had a chance to win its firstchampionship since 2002. EvenGuiao, who dispenses a lot morecriticism of his players than hedoes compliments, soundedbubbly. “I have no doubt that he’sa great player,” he said. “I think Qis the best import of the confer-ence right at this point.”

W ith things going smoothlyon the court Greer settled

into the comfortable butuneventful life of an Americanbasketball player in Manila. Heand Sanders lived in an upscaletwo-room suite paid for by theteam, and a personal driverchauffeured them everywhere.Around the city Greer hadreached a level of celebrity onpar with movie stars and super-models. He had to get used towide-eyed stares and hearingpeople call out his name in amock stadium announcer’s voiceon an almost daily basis. “It’skind of cool,” Greer said. “It’snice to know that the people recognize me and just like meand look up to me.”

The A-list status that madeGreer the most popular man inevery mall he visited also madehim a target for scam artists.Once a man threw himself infront of the Red Bull team vanand demanded payment forinjuries he claimed to have suf-fered. “The guy walked on the leftside of the car, and then he

walked back in front of the car,and traffic wasn’t moving,” saysSanders. “He had a bowl of riceand a Red Bull in his hand.”When the driver eased off thebrakes, Sanders says, “The guythrew himself on the car, threwhis rice all over the windshield,and then scraped his food off thecar back into his bowl.” The driverended up throwing 100 pesos atthe guy to make him leave.

Adjusting to the Philippineswas easy for Greer. All he did wasplay basketball, eat, take naps,

and hang out with his girlfriend.A self-proclaimed homebody,he’s nothing like the trash-talking, stereotypical Americanathletes many Filipinos expect.His hooded eyes display littleemotion. He keeps a restrainedsmile on his face during conver-sation, polite but never exu-berant. His voice, steady andsmooth, rarely rises from its calmand humble tone. Even the typ-ical difficulties foreigners livingin Manila face—endless gridlock,overwhelming diesel fumes,

loneliness—failed to faze him. Greer and Sanders almost

always ate at American chainrestaurants like Chili’s and TGIFriday’s, and spent theirevenings at the multiplex orwatching pirated DVDs in theirhotel room. Killing time becamea way of life for the couple.“Trying to find something todo—that’s our adventure for theday,” Sanders said. “We playMonopoly a lot. That’ll take fouror five hours of your day, goingaround and around.” The

monotony was A-OK with Greer.“I’m pretty much happy withthat,” he said. “I’d rather chilland just relax and enjoy mytime, just me and my girl.”

Sanders, who met Greer whenthey were freshmen in highschool, had more troubleadjusting. She’d spent the lastfour years working full-time,studying at Marquette University,and driving to Chicago to watchGreer’s DePaul games. “I wasbusy all the time,” she said. InManila, with nothing to do forthe first time in years, she passedtime in Internet cafes, writing tofriends back home. “I think theyhate it too, because they have towrite back,” Sanders said. “I havetime to do nothing but write longe-mails, and they don’t.”

Sanders looked forward to gamedays because it meant an opportu-nity to socialize with the players’wives and girlfriends behind theRed Bull bench. “There’s not reallyanyone else to talk to,” she said,“so when we get to the games Iusually sit next to the coach’sdaughter, and we sit there most ofthe game talking to each other.”

Even Greer admitted sufferingfrom occasional homesickness.He said there were times whenhe felt he’d do almost anythingfor a cheesesteak from TasteBuds on Chicago’s west side orchimichangas from Taco &Burrito Palace. He wished hecould get a haircut, but he didn’ttrust Filipino barbers to give hima proper fade. The one positivething about being sent homeearly, he said, would be getting tospend Christmas or New Year’swith his family. He especiallymissed his old DePaul teammates.In Manila, he said, “I haven’treally hung out with none of myteammates or any other players.”

By early November Greer wasrelaxing on the court as well

as off. In two consecutiveblowout losses to the Alaska Acesand the Coca-Cola Tigers, whichdropped Red Bull to 4-4, heaveraged less than 17 points pergame and made only 27 percentof his shots. Days later, Guiaoand other members of the RedBull coaching staff called Greerand Sanders in for a meeting.They told Greer that his bodylanguage on the court made himlook like he didn’t care aboutwinning, and that he needed toplay harder in practice to inspirehis teammates to do the same.“He’s not going to make an extraeffort,” Guiao said. “He’ll do thething that you ask him to do, buthe’s going to do the minimum.”

Greer told the coaches hesometimes took breaks in prac-tice because he didn’t want towear himself out before games. “Iwas participating in all the drills,and I wasn’t getting much of abreather,” he said. “I felt that I’mout here doing a lot of the work,and I need a break too. They waslooking at it like, he’s the import—he don’t need no breaks.”

The next game may have beenGreer’s best performance of the

Greer

The Cuneta Astrodome in Manila; Greer calls for a time-out as his teammates fight for the ball

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season. He tallied 37 points, 16rebounds, and nine assists in awin over the Barangay GinebraKings. He scored on jump shots,three-pointers, put-back dunks,and impossible-looking one-handed floaters. He toyed withdefenders, slicing through threeor four Barangay players at atime with hesitation andcrossover dribble moves beforedishing to his teammates for easybaskets. Even at his best, how-ever, Greer oozed nonchalance.He trotted up the court onoffense while his teammates heldthe ball and waited to pass to himand got back slowly on defense.During timeouts he stood in thehuddle with his hands on hiships, head drooping to the side,looking far too casual for a playerworking on a triple-double.

The disconnect betweenGreer’s body language and hisprodigious output confoundedhis PBA coaches. He outplayedrival imports while skulkingaround the court like he’d had apregame cocktail of Prozac andsleeping pills. He was still thePBA’s leading scorer, and RedBull was one of the top threeteams in the league, but with thepostseason only weeks awayGuiao felt his team wasn’t goodenough to win a championship.The thought of replacing Greercrossed his mind, even though heknew it was a risk. “We’rereaching a point where it’s betterto make a wrong decision thannot make one at all,” he said.

The threat of being replaceddidn’t bother Greer, Sanders said,but she hated the uncertainty:

“The hardest part has been notknowing what’s gonna come next,not knowing if he’ll be on thisteam today or tomorrow. Do youreally get settled, or do you keepeverything packed up and waitfor the phone call?”

Then a week before Christmas,playing against Air 21 in thesecond-to-last game of the regularseason, Greer scored only ninepoints, went 4-for-21 from thefield, bricked nine out of ten freethrows, and had seven turnovers.Several times he failed to seal offhis defender and deny access tothe passing lane. Shawn Daniels,Air 21’s import and Greer’s pri-mary defender, wound up col-lecting six steals. The rest of theteam, however, thrived withouthelp from their star, winning inspite of his miserable night.

Guiao now believed that evenwhen Greer played well he wasn’tthe best choice for the team.Guiao worried that the Filipinoplayers were in such awe ofGreer’s talent that they deferredto him and didn’t get involved inthe offense. “He’s so good as anindividual the rest of the team’stalent is suppressed,” he said.

Less than a week after Greer’snine-point debacle and threeweeks away from the playoffs,Red Bull brought in JamesPenny, a 29-year-old, six-foot-sixleaper, as a possible replacement.Penny played for Texas ChristianUniversity in the mid-90s andhis professional career hasincluded stops in the U.S. minorleagues, Canada, Argentina, theDominican Republic, China, andLebanon. According to Penny,

Red Bull team officials told himthey needed a replacementbecause Greer was injured. “Ihonestly thought he was hurt,”Penny said. “Usually when some-thing like this happens the teamis struggling. You don’t come inand try to replace somebodywho’s the leading scorer in theleague with his team being insecond or third place.”

Team officials called Greerhours before Penny arrived andtold him the new import wouldbe in practice the next day. Theyplanned to watch the two face off,then choose whichever playerlooked better. Greer said he felt“kinda shocked” when he heardhe’d be playing for his job at thenext practice. “I just thought theyshould have informed me and letme know ahead of time,” he said.

The team wound up taking itstime with the decision, watchingPenny and Greer throughout theweek. During a full-court scrim-mage at Penny’s second practice,Greer showed flashes of bril-liance—a dunk over Penny andtwo other players and a crossoverthat left Penny flat-footed at thetop of the key—but Penny’s teamwas more cohesive. He passed tobackdoor cutters for easy layupsand set screens that gave histeammates open jumpers. As thetwo continued practicing togetherthe tension between them evapo-rated. Penny even encouragedGreer to start acting like thevocal leader the team wanted.“To me, he’s been here workinghis butt off the whole time,” hesaid. “I told him, ‘It’s your job,man. Don’t let anyone take your

job from you. If they ask you todo something like be more of aleader, then why not do it?’”

Red Bull’s final regular seasongame, against Coca-Cola, was twodays before Christmas. If theteam won, they would tie forsecond place and force a one-game playoff for an automaticsemifinal berth. Penny had beenin the country less than a weekand was still suffering from jetlag. Guiao decided it was too riskyto play him and penciled in Greeras the starter. It seemed like thelast chance for Greer to prove hisworth to the team, but hoursbefore what could have been hislast game in a Red Bull uniform,he was as blase as ever. “If theydon’t like me being myself, whichI have been since I got here, so beit,” he said. “If they decide toreplace me, that’s on them. It’sreally not in my control.”

The threat of replacement didseem to affect Greer’s perform-ance. He looked like he was run-ning harder than in previousgames, and he avoided takingmany of the long-distance shotsthat drove his coaches mad. With20 seconds left and the gametied, he stood at the three-pointline with the ball in his hands. Heblew by his defender, jump-stopped a few feet away from thebasket, and drew a foul whenthree opposing players pouncedon him. He made one of two freethrows to clinch the game. Thewin was enough to earn Greeranother chance to play, this timein the one-game playoff forsecond place against BarangayGinebra. He scored 37 points andgrabbed 13 rebounds, but he hadzero assists and Red Bull lost.

Later that week, Penny officiallyreplaced Greer. In Red Bull’s firstplayoff series, he led the team to athree-game sweep of the AlaskaAces. “I am more convinced nowthat Penny is the right import for

us,” Guiao told the PhilippineDaily Inquirer. “He’s some sortof savior.” Six weeks later, Pennyled the team to a 4-2 defeat ofthe Chunkee Giants in the FiestaConference best-of-seven cham-pionship series.

Before leaving the Philippinesin early January, Greer said

he wasn’t disappointed with theway the season ended and lookedforward to his next job. “I knowwhat I’ve accomplished and I’mgonna leave with my head uphigh,” he said. “My agent’s got alist of things lined up for mewhen I get back. It’s just a matterof choosing the best job for me.This is just the beginning. There’sa lot of basketball still left in me.”

Greer was right. By the secondweek of February, before thePBA playoffs had even ended, hewas playing for the Tulsa 66ers,one of eight teams in the NBA’sNational Basketball Develop-mental League. He spent most ofhis first week in Tulsa sitting onthe bench, playing only 11 min-utes and scoring two points inhis first four games. But Greerslowly worked his way into therotation. In back-to-back gameson March 3 and 4, he scored 16points in 9 minutes and 14points in 13 minutes. Thesequick bursts of baskets hinted ata role Greer might be able to playin the NBA—a bench player whocan provide instant offense andswing the momentum of a game.

NBDL rosters are dense withyoung talent, and getting noticedby NBA scouts will not be easyfor Greer. Most NBDL playersare former college stars just likehim. He won’t be scoring 27points per game, he won’t have adriver, and it’s highly unlikelyhe’ll become a celebrity, even inTulsa. But he’s one step closer tothe NBA—and he’ll be able to geta haircut. v

Greer felt “kinda shocked” when he heard he’d be playing for his job at thenext practice.