February 2009 Volume 9 No.7 The Newspaper of the Johns Hopkins University Nitze School of Advanced International Studies

F i n a n c i a l c r i s i s h i t s S A I SS c h o o l a n d s t u d e n t s a d j u s t t o f a l l i n g

e n d o w m e n t s , h i g h e r e x c h a n g e r a t e s

SAIS McCain group praises ObamaBy Phil Kreck

Disappointed by loss, theSAIS McCain group hasfound satisfactory per-

formance in President Obama.Despite disagreeing with manyof his campaign promises, andhaving a strong preference forMcCain in the election, theSAIS McCain group has, post-election, found many ofObama’s initial policies andactions to be adequate, if notdesirable, in addressing our con-cerns on key issues.

First and foremost, it isimpossible to ignore the energyand excitement that PresidentObama has brought toWashington and the country. This “national optimism”is a welcome relief after years of despondency, and itis especially important during our current economictrouble and while fighting an enemy whose objectivesinclude undermining our national spirit and unity.Whether the pessimism was real or imagined, justifiedor self-exaggerated, or just a result of strategic propa-ganda, there is no doubt that hundreds of thousands ofpeople were incredibly displeased with the last admin-

istration. True to form, our democraticsystem captured the national mood andthe national vote, and we should allrecognize and appreciate the relativelypeaceful and effective transition fromone party to the other.

President Obama’s decision tokeep Secretary of Defense Gates issignificant. No other single decisiondid more to ease the anxiety of securi-ty-minded conservatives and help usall breathe a sigh of relief. ThePresident may have had any number ofmotivations for this decision—fromappeasing certain conservatives, creat-ing the image of bipartisanship, or sin-cerely recognizing the value of conti-nuity in a time of war—but at the endof the day, Obama demonstrated great

wisdom by keeping a former intelligence officer andcounterterrorism expert in charge of our military whilewe fight two major wars and a global “test of wills”against a lethal and suicidal jihadist movement.

Closing Guantanamo Bay will likewise prove to bea positive decision, contingent on the newAdministration’s pending plans to hold and prosecuteGitmo’s infamous detainees. Obama has recognized that

Continued on page 6

By Anonymous

My first assignment as a writer for the SAISObserver. I could think of no better opportunityto talk to SAISers’ about dating and first dates.

With lots of cultural diversity at SAIS, everyone hastheir own understanding about “dating” and how to handlethe electricity of seeing that person. Besides that, manag-ing the time you have available to find time for that spe-cial (or not-so-special) person may be a little difficult.Dating may seem impossible because of our tight sched-ules. For many of us the only time we have to socialize isat the popular happy hours on Tuesdays at Lucky Bar oron Friday nights at SAIS. However, this situation does notstop couples from starting to date.

This begs the question: What chance do we have ofmeeting people atSAIS with whom wemay connect? It seemsthat people are notlooking for romance; itjust happens.Nevertheless, howdoes “the chase” start?

Interviews withmany well-known couples and single students at SAISabout their first dates with fellow SAISers brought outinteresting pointers for dating. Speaking with studentswho had just started dating how the flirtation process alsoproved interesting.

Many SAISers felt that romance starts with a strongfriendship. The best relationships flourish in a class envi-ronment where two people make back and forth eye con-tact and look away with nervous half-smiles, confidentthat they can be themselves. Others answered that theydid not know when the dating started or even more, at thebeginning they did not know that they were dating!Feelings simply emerged. Romance meant going with theflow while they took the same classes or were assigned todo a presentation together. People need to read the signs,but what are the signs?

The simplest signs are: frequent phone calls with themost trivial of excuses, such as: “How should I apply tothis internship?” “Can I have your notes?” “Do you have

my pen?” Having long conversations makes all thedifference. There are other signs that are more direct, suchas: Make a drink Trivial-Pursuit bet (if I win the game youhave to drink)—as one of my interviewees said, drinkinghelps. Other signs,that are less expect-ed, include drivingto another state tosee that person, ortouching his or herhand and feelingbutterflies.

You knowyou’ve got it badwhen you hug thatperson and don’t want that person to go away. Sometimespeople feel the spark and the connection is obvious. It isimpossible not to laugh when he or she says somethingeven when it is not funny. Well, SAISers I think that thosewho dare to make the first move will be surprised by theresults! Feelings are always uncertain and unpredictable,but that’s what makes them exciting.

On the other hand, there were some interestinganswers about SAISers’ first dates, in which things did notwork out well. It can start with a planned date for a friend.Sometimes, there is just no connection and you cannot

B e myv a l e n t i n e ?D a t i n g e x p e r i e n c e s a t S A I S By Masha Bolotinskaya

Washington’s stimulus package will do little inthe way of protecting a majority of SAISstudents. While the financial crisis has pro-

vided much fodder for class and policy discussions, ata school where 40% of the student body consists ofinternational students, the crisis has hit home.International students have faced currency crises intheir home countries while American students havebeen vulnerable to loss of wealth as the Dow plum-mets and job insecurity increases.

Cost of attendance is not cheap. Students pay astaggering US$33,178 per year for tuition alone. SAISestimates that including additional yearly costs, forthings such as health insurance, books, and room andboard, students at the DC campus have a total cost ofUS$56,940 per academic year. Students in Bologna areexpected to have a yearly cost of € 41,565, or roughlyUS$53,542.

While some students request no financial aid, anoverwhelming majority seeks assistance to pay fortheir SAIS education. Financial aid is provided prima-rily in the form of loans and fellowships. US citizensmay apply for student and personal loans, while inter-national students only qualify for loans from US banksif they are able to find an American to serve as guaran-tor. Fellowship money need not be repaid and is themore attractive segment of a financial aid package.Money for fellowships comes from endowments anddue to the current financial crisis, these endowments,like many other investments, have significantlydecreased in value.

This academic year the SAIS Administrationobserved a significant reduction in returns fromendowments.

To combat the reduction in assets available forstudent aid, the SAIS Office of Development has

launched an aggressive fundraising campaign to replen-ish the pot. The campaign has been fairly successfulthus far; however, that money is far from guaranteedand will only be distributed in approximately three tofive years from now.

Despite SAIS’s status as part of Johns HopkinsUniversity, the financial assistance that SAIS’s DCcampus provides to students comes only from SAISendowments. This funding is completely separate fromother schools, such as JHU Medical School or theSchool of Music. Furthermore, the SAIS Bologna andNanjing campuses are also expected to independentlyprovide financial aid to students studying in Italy andChina, respectively.

Continued on page 8

The simplest signs are:frequent phone calls

with the most trivial ofexcuses, such as: “Can Ihave your notes?” “Do

you have my pen?”

I started my research inter-viewing many well-knowncouples and single students

at SAIS about their firstdates with other SAISsers.

February 2009 THE SAIS OBSERVER page 2

LETTER FROM THE EDITORS

The SAIS ObserverEditors-in-ChiefSamantha WatsonGraham BockingAndre Castillo

ContributorsPaul Alois

AnonymousMasha Bolotinskaya

Sean BrooksKevin Cross

Richard DownieJamie Huckabay

Niv EllisNikolas Foster

Phil KreckMatt Kaczmarek

Benjamin KrauseThe SAIS Observer is a news monthly written, edited, and produced bythe students of the Paul H. Nitze School of Advanced International Studies(SAIS) of The Johns Hopkins University.

SAIS students, faculty and members of the administration at theWashington, D.C. campus, Bologna campus, and the Hopkins-NanjingCenter are encouraged to submit articles, letters to the editor, photographs,cartoons, and other items for consideration.

Material for consideration or inquiries may be sent to : observer@jhu.edu.

The SAIS Observer is an approved SAIS student organization. Opinionsexpressed in the SAIS Observer are not necessarily the views of the edi-tors, SAIS, or the University.

The Observer welcomes accolades, denials,comments, critiques, and hate mail at

observer@jhu.edu.

Jessica LamberstonNate RosenblattGabriel Serrato

Photos:Niv Ellis

Richard DownieNikolas FosterGoogle imagesAmanda Lullo

Nate Rosenblatt

DD ii vv ee rr ss ii oo nn ss ::Keep your eyes and ears open and contribute to the sections

below! Email us at observer@jhu.edu with submissions

T h e O s t r i c hWho’s having a good month, and whomight want to stick their heads in the sandand hope for better luck next month?

LosersMr. and Mr. SAISBrian Stout and Aart Greens, co-winnersof the Mr. SAIS competition, trouncedthe competition with their smoothdemeanors and matching Chip & Daleoutfits. (more on page 9)

Old SAIS Observer editorsAfter successfully turning over responsi-bility for zero-hour deadlines, harangu-ing students for articles, and otherunpleasantries, they are free at last, ohfree at last.

Southeast Asian StudiesFuture ad campaigns should be relative-ly easy after producing what seems to beSAIS’s first alum to make it to the U.S.presidential cabinet.

Future SAIS Deans

,Laura Zuniga Huizar, who"is now head-ed for the beauty queen scandal title witha drug and weapons bust."

Mexico's Miss International 2009

The bar has been set, ladies and gentle-men. We will expect nothing less.

Former Sen. Tom DaschleDaschle, a key pick for secretary ofHealth and Human Services, never madeit out of confirmation hearings in spite ofbeing more forthcoming over his failureto pay taxes than Sec. Geithner had been.

VerbatimWhat the SAIS

communityhas been saying

Winners

As the new editors of the SAIS Observer we hopethat you enjoy our 'inaugural' issue! It has beena steep learning curve over the past few months

for our team but with the guidance of the outgoing edi-tors Niloufer Siddiqui, Nita Gojani and AnnaYukhananov , the transition has been as smooth as ournew president's. We could not have done it without theirthoughtful help and advice and The Observer and SAISowe them a deep debt of gratitude for all of the greatwork they have done for the paper.

First, we would like to thank our writers who havemade this issue a reality. In particular, we would like tothank those loyal staples of the paper that saw fit to con-tinue writing under a new editorship, as well as the newcontributors who have just begun what will hopefully bethe first of many contributions. For those readers whohave never written for the paper, we always welcomenew ideas and stories. If you enjoy what you read in thefollowing pages, consider coming to our next meetingand how you can publish your own stories!

As former writers for the Observer, the three of usfeel honored to have been given the opportunity to helpproduce this paper and feel it is important that you get toknow a little more about us.

Graham is a first year MA candidate in CanadianStudies (and proud to make up 10% of that department'sstudent body!) and hails from north of the border.Considering a career in journalism, he thought that join-ing the editorial team of the Observer would be a greatway to not only eliminate the pesky remnants of freetime clinging to his SAIS schedule but also test thewaters of the field. It also allows him to exercise his pas-sion for talking in the third person.

Andre is a first year candidate in the field of beinga rock star specializing in the pursuit of awesomenes, afield otherwise known as Middle East Studies; he willalso be the department’s social chair for the comingyear. He enjoys long walks with the bedou among therugged mountains of the Arabian Peninsula, blowingsheesha smoke rings into the airs of Cairo, and sippingyellow Gatorade.

Samantha Watson is an MA candidate, third semes-ter, in International Policy. Samantha honed her craftwriting for the Observer for two semesters beforebecoming an editor. Her professional interests lie ingender issues, development, and Latin America.

Though we’re living in a time of change, webelieve in the value of continuity. It is our sincere hopethat you will continue to enjoy the Observer as youalways have and more. As Anna, Nita, and Niloufersaid: the Observer is always there for you, whether forenlightenment, or procrastination!

150

38.50

6

0

0

10

23

40

52.01

180

By the Numbers

Average cost of ahotel in New YorkCity

Cost of a roundtr ipbust t icket to NYC

Number of f i rmsvis i ted

Average compensat ion forinternships

Number of paidposi t ions avai lableto graduat ing seniors

Auct ion pr ice for acorporate f inancereview session

Auct ion pr ice for aMil ler Highl i feGif t Basket (a lsoknown as a case)

Auct ion pr ice fortwo s ignedFukayama books

Auct ion pr ice for aSerenade by PabloGonzales

Final pr ice forClubbing with BenKrause at the Mr.SAIS auct ion

"Middle East, Middle East, ah, you're socontemptuous of the rest of the world."

—Anonymous student

"It is better to get some sun for the psyche than spendthe hours reading inside—so keep that in mind for thework for your other classes."—Anonymous professor

Old SAIS Observer EditorsThe old team, who lived the fun, excite-ment, and comraderie that makes theObserver so great, will be greatly missed.Thankfully, they left us well prepared, sowe can now have all the fun to ourselves.

Best Dance MovesSAIS Dean Bonnie Wilson, who, as oneof five judges, endearingly supportedher student government through heart,hand, and hip Friday night at the Mr.SAIS auction. (more on page 9)

"Government workers...they have values to somedegree." —Alumni at a panel during the NY career trek

“The covariance of my love life shows a negative correla-tion to my studies. In fact, the chances of me getting a girlin the next year are more than three standard deviationsaway from the average, which means that my chances makeme an outlier. So I'm screwed.” —Anonymous student

"Maybe Harvard students can't think unless all wordsstart with the same letter." —Anonymous professorcommenting on how an author named three types of

power all starting with the letter "C"

“Remember John Roberts when he messed up theoath for Obama? A piece of paper, just read from a

piece of paper! He should have called me.” —Anonymous professor of international law

“Do you go to church? No? It's ok! goto SAIS...go to church...it's too much.”—Anonymous professor

"You failed the gender test, you have nogender..."—Anonymous student

February 2009 THE SAIS OBSERVER page 3

SAIStudents:

With the SAIS Inauguration Ball behind us, all our backed taxes paid and class-es in full-swing, we, your SGA, are working with joyous fury to ever improve yourSAIS Experience.

The big news is that Secretary General Ban Ki-Moon has accepted our invita-tion and will be addressing the 2009 Commencement Ceremony in May! Additionalexciting news of only slightly less international import is that this the latest incarna-tion of Mr. SAIS and the SAIS Auction was a tremendous success and we will bedividing the proceeds between summer internship scholarships and the 2009 ClassGift.

Of course, though the social events are the most visible aspect of our work, theSGA spends most of its time engaged with the administration. To keep you up tospeed, we have just received the results from the Student Services Survey, thank youall who participated. Right now, we are meeting with each office separately to goover your feedback and create actionable responses. We will be keeping you updatedin the coming weeks as to how it is all proceeding. If you have more to say, please letus know at saissga@jhu.edu, post a comment on the SAIS SGA Facebook.com page,or leave an anonymous message either online at the SGA Website’s “Contact Us” link(www.sais-jhu.edu/students/sga) or through our comment box in the basement ofNitze. We are particularly interested in hearing more about your specific bidding andregistration woes from this semester. Finally, the SGA posts the minutes of our week-ly meetings. So if you’re interested in what we’re up to, check out our onlineArchive.

Mark your calendars and make a special appearance at Happy Hour THISWEEK (Feb 20th) to support the Volunteer Committee as they get ready to supportPlanting Empowerment in Panama over spring break!

Finally, for all you 1st-years out there, now is the time to start thinking aboutrunning for SGA for next year. You know that you’ve always wanted to write theSAIS Observer Update, and here’s your chance!

Ben Krause,SGA President

SGA Monthly ReportThe student government chimes in with announcements and reminders

By Ben Krause, SGA President

I’m told that everyone watches the Super Bowl, even the President himself. So Idecided to join a bunch of Steelers fans for the evening and make inane commentsand glug cheap beer while they got increasingly tense and irritable.

Games are more fun when you back one of the teams, so having neither been toPhoenix nor Pittsburgh, I asked myself one simple question to decide who would get thepotentially decisive benefit of my armchair support: Which team has the best uniform?That immediately ruled out Arizona, with their frankly embarrassing helmet displaying acartoon sparrow on it. I briefly wondered why they didn’t chose a more intimidating birdto sum up their fighting spirit; a buzzard or perhaps a pterodactyl. So the Steelers it is, Idecided.

Having selected my team, I settled down to watch the adverts – sorry the game –and began to map out in my head what else I could have done with four hours of my life(a couple of essays, 34 games ofpool, fly to Tampa and still get tothe stadium in time to see thefourth quarter...). Snapped out ofmy daydreams by the host of theparty, I was presented with a corndog -- apparently a special giftbefitting my status as honoraryforeigner. I was new to the con-cept, but it seemed to be some sortof moulded mystery meat on astick, encased in a doughnut. Iwashed it down with a large bottleof something called Colt 45, whichtastes like the sort of stuff problemdrinkers turn to when they’vealready got through the contents of the cupboard under the sink.

My friends tried to answer my questions: “Who’s the fat guy commentating? (JohnMadden), “Is eye-gouging allowed?” (No) “Why can’t anyone sing the national anthemwithout going all Mariah Carey and making a big deal of it?” (Leave her alone, all herfamily got shot), “Where’s the bathroom?” As the first half dawdled to a close I began toreconsider my Sunday evening options, when all of a sudden the game sprang to life. ASteelers bloke intercepted the ball, barrelled his way to the opposite end of the pitch, andin for a touchdown. My party friends went ballistic. Excitement is an emotion I had neverassociated with American sports but even I had to admit – that was quite a play.

I had heard that the commercials are usually the best bit about the Super Bowl andthat some of this year’s ads would be in 3-D. I put on the cardboard specs kindly provid-ed by my local Safeway, but nothing seemed to work. All I go was a talking horse and ablurry shadow of MC Hammer encouraging me to trade in my gold jewellery for cash.But suddenly, 3-D vision kicked in and I was assaulted by a troupe of dancing cartoonreptiles and singing aliens. It’s all got a bit frightening, and Bruce Springsteen hadn’teven come on for the half time show yet. When he did, he looked like a wild-haired,deranged old uncle on crack. However, he was greeted with loud cheers by my fellowSteelers’ fans and then hoots of laughter when he attempted to slide across the stage onhis knees and crashed into a camera. Clearly winded, he struggled to force out ‘GloryDays,’ helped by a man dressed as a pirate. Things went from bad to worse during thegrand finale when he almost garrotted himself with his guitar strap while performing aseries of complex arm-flailing manoeuvres. By then I was drunk, confused, and impa-tient for the game to get going again.

The third quarter ploded along with absolutely no sign of life from the littleSparrows. But as the fourth quarter got going, they suddenly mounted a stirring come-back with two quick touchdowns. A pall of anxiety fell over the room and the black-shirt-ed fans around me started muttering dark curses into their beers. The Steelers were goingto throw it all away. I noticed, with surprise, that I was as anxious as the rest of them,chewing my nails absent-mindedly and shuffling around on my seat like a fidgety child.Then, with the clock running down the Steeler rescued the game with – actually, youprobably know the rest, unless you’ve been in the SAIS library the whole time. (On sec-

Englishman at a SuperBowl Party

ond thought, the Steelers won).Afterwards, my new-found friends were delirious with happiness. Someone put

“We are the Champions” by Queen on the stereo, and a succession of increasingly inco-herent toasts were made to their team’s status as ‘world champions.’ I considered point-ing out that no-one else in the world played American football (the clue is in the name)but decided it would be churlish to rain on their parade. In fact, I couldn’t help but to getswept up by the occasion. I declared lifelong allegiance to the Steelers and promised tobuy one of those yellow-comfort-blanket things they all wave around at games. And I’meven considering a visit to the Steel City during Spring Break. On second thought, maybethat’s taking my newly-discovered passion a little too far....

Richard Downie is an MIPP candidate focusing on African Studies.

Happy Steelers fans.

By Richard Downie

SSAAIISS SSGGAA EElleeccttiioonnssLooking to serve SAIS?

Wanting to improve the SAIS Experience?Are you a straight-shooter with upper management writ-

ten all over you? Run for SAIS Student Government! On Tuesday, March 10th, SAIS will hold elections for 2ndYear DC representatives.

Positions include SGA President, Treasurer and SocialChair. All MA1 and MA2 students are eligible to run. If you are interested, if you have any questions or if youwould like to nominate yourself or your friend for office,please email the SGA at saissga@jhu.edu.

Perks (only a few of the myriad):- Opportunity to represent SAIS Students and their interests- Resume building leadership experience- $1,900 Stipend- Drink FREE at all Happy Hours- Help directly influence the future of SAISSelect the Commencement Speaker for the Class of 2010

Important Dates:

Tuesday February 17th – Q&SGA – Questions andAnswers with current SGA Reps at the Cookie Hour inNitze Cafeteria. An informal opportunity to talk aboutwhat we do and why we love it!Tuesday February 24th – Q&SGA Redux – In caseyou missed us the first time through, we’ll be in theNitze Cafeteria again to tell you all about our workand answer any questions you have.Sunday March 1st – Deadline to register to run – toregister simply email saissga@jhu.edu expressing yourintent and your desired position.Monday March 2nd-Monday March 9th –Campaigning (posters and the like). Get out there andlet the student body know you’re on their side!Friday March 6th – Happy Hour Speeches – Wowyour peers with your oratory flair or simply entertainthem with an interpretive dance detailing your com-mitment to public service.Tuesday March 10th-Thursday March 12th –ELECTIONS!!! All voting will be online, so makesure your friends and lovers are exercising their consti-tutional right!

President: Ben Krause (benjaminkrause@jhu.edu)If you’re looking to actively serve ourcommunity and influence the directionof the school, I can think of no betterway. My resonsibilities include respre-senting SAIS students off campus, sit-ting on councils, setting SGA objec-tives, overseeing SGA comittees, andsimply being available to you all as a colleague and friend.

Treasurer: Jin Lee (lee125@jhu.edu)I manage SAIS student clubs, amresponsible for accounting andbudgeting of all SGA and studentevents (including Happy Hours). Ifyou want to build accounting andbudgeting skills, network, and serveSAIS students, this job is for you!

Social Chair: Victoria Wilson (vwilson6@jhu.edu) I manage the Social Committee and am also the Director ofthe Student Foundation and work to raise money for thesummer internship fund and the classgift though fundraisers like theInternational Dinner and Mr. SAIS,and are great chances to build yourevent planning, marketing, budgetmanagement, and fund-raising skills.

BBee tt tt ee rr kknn ooww aann SSGGAATTuueessddaayy MMaarrcchh 1100tthh!!

Ahh, the International Policy Practicum. More fod-der for the first day of school verbal sparringalong the lines of: "What did you

do over break? Oh, I went to the moon."Excellent material for hyperbolic talk inthe annual contest to out-travel our fel-low students.

So where did we go? This year wewent to Tanzania, South Africa, Zanzibar,Mexico, Senegal, China, and Arkansas—ask Jason about his exciting endeavorsthere. We did not go to Argentina—askthe World Bank about that one. But wasit all about the travel?

Actually, the projects were just asfascinating as the locales: Researchingbio-fuels, upgrading electricity produc-tion and grids, reducing timber overuse,and consulting environmental SMEs.

My team worked for the WWF (notthe wrestlers, the World Wildlife Fundfor Nature) to examine China’s positionas “factory of the world” and to come upwith policy recommendations that wouldreduce China’s demand for resources in “priority areas,”such as the Congo Basin. We came up with a topic aftertalking to the head of sustainable development of aChinese computer company. This company is one ofWWF’s partners and was interested in using more recy-cled materials in the production of their computers. Wesmelled a win-win situation coming along. Could we pos-sibly come up with recommendations good for both busi-ness and the environment? Recommendations thatincreased computer recycling, reduced China’s demandfor resources from "priority areas" and lowered produc-tion costs for computer companies?

The theory sounded great. But in practice, thisproved to be a quite formidable task. We soon discoveredthat the country already had a highly efficient albeit unof-ficial recycling infrastructure in place. Given China’shuge supply of cheap labor and relatively low wages,scrap metal scavengers and computer buyers (the first tierof the unofficial recycling sys-tem) can make a decent livingof about $150 a month and thusprevent the official systemfrom working efficiently.

How so, you might won-der? If, for example, your com-puter dies on you, you caneither take it to an official recy-cling center and collect 200 RMB (about $30) or cash inup to 1000 RMB (about $150) by selling it to one of themany private collection stores. If you chose the latter (andwho wouldn’t) the computer will then be brought to a sitelike Ba Jia Cun in Beijing, where the functioning partswill be extracted and resold. What doesn’t work will thenbe transported to one of the disassembly sites in southernChina. Places like Guiyu have become infamous for theirentire population making a living by manually takingapart the computers, melting away plastics and bathingmotherboards in acid baths to extract the precious metals

from the computers (for some shocking pictures punch in“Guiyu” at Google images).

Officially, this should not be happening. This proce-dure is harming the environment and also the health of itsworkers while the official recycling facilities are runningidle. But both the local and the central government knowthat millions of people make a living from sorting throughtrash, picking out the valuables, bringing those to collect-ing points, and then taking the items apart by hand. Whatalternative form of livelihood could the central or provin-cial government offer? How could they prohibit this formof recycling without causing civil unrest, one of thebiggest fears of the Chinese government?

To complicate things even more, there is a huge for-eign component to the problem. Every year, an estimated20-50 million tons of e-waste are shipped to the develop-ing world. We realized that it could not just be up to Chinato enforce its laws and ban e-waste from being imported

or recycled that way. WhileChina is hesitant to enforcelaws that could potentiallyforce millions of people (thescavengers, sorters and acidbathers) out of their jobs, we inthe “West” haven’t paid toomuch attention to what actual-ly happens to that old comput-

er we tossed or gave to the Good Will store last time wemoved.

So much for the environmental side. On the econom-ic side, things did not look much better. While our teamwas still trying to establish the relationship between high-er amounts of recycling and lower production costs formanufacturers, the current drop in commodity pricesdampened the prospects for companies seriously interest-ed in recycling. And in the long run, China’s efficientunofficial recycling system will fall apart once the scav-engers and sorters need more than $150 a month to pay the

bills. Would wethen just ship our

e-waste to Vietnam? Or Somalia?Our time in China gave me a lot to

think about for the plane ride home. Aftereight hours at 35,000 feet, when even theusually tantalizing distractions of finallywatching all those "B" movies withJennifer Aniston seemed utterly dreary, Ibegan thinking about end life cycles andcarbon footprints. I began thinking aboutthe fact that my school (courtesy of theLuce foundation) had just spend a smallfortune on me and my teammates in thehopes that we would come up with thesuggestions this planet needs.

I realizedthat this trip, ourproject, wouldhave to in anabstract waycontribute notonly to amelio-rating my cur-rent carbonfootprint, but also to addressing resource overuse andcoming up with a more sustainable way of living. But howcan we address this without changing consumer behavior?Can we go on shipping our stuff to China under the pre-text of their comparative advantage in taking computersapart? Should we buy that ultra thin Laptop while our oldone still works and we do not know how the new one isproduced or the old one discarded?

Looking back at our fantastic time in China andahead at the taskof turning allour data into ap r e s e n t a b l eresearch paper, Iguess the bestthing I got outof theIn t e rna t i ona lP o l i c yPracticum is

that it unearthed many more questions than I had going into it. But while the answers are out there, we might notwant to hear them.

Nikolas Foster is a second year IP candidate

By Nikolas Foster

February 2009 THE SAIS OBSERVER page 4

Around the world in a 1000 words

The theory sounded great. But inpractice, coming up with recommen-dations good for both business and

the environment proved to be quite aformidable task.

This procedure is harmingthe environment and alsothe health of its workers

while the official recyclingfacilities are rrunning idle

International Policy Practicum puts students to work

A collection of e-waste in China From L-R: Nikolas Foster, Eduard Eykelberg and Jan Dams in the Forbidden City

Nikolas Foster interviewing a Chinese official

How could they prohibitthis form of recyclingwithout causing civil

unrest, one of the biggestfears of the Chinese gov-

ernment?

The best thing I got out ofthe International Policy

Practicum is that itunearthed many more ques-

tions than I had going in to it

February 2009 THE SAIS OBSERVER page 5

We stood at the peak of an especiallylarge sand dune as the chilling wind ofthe desert evening cut through the fab-

ric of our clothes. A not-so-subtle hint that thesun was setting on what would be our last offourteen enlightening days and nights in Kuwaitand the United Arab Emirates. Though the per-fect setting to reflect on our junket, we had littletime to do so, for we were in the presence of roy-alty and had to uphold the reputation of our ven-erable school of advanced international studies.

A combination of cutting edge and oldworld symbolizes these oil states, which mani-fests itself in unexpected places. That evening wewould meet a Sheikh, his royal entourage and hisbirds engaging a sport of kings thousands ofyears old: falconing. But, it was falconing withGPS.

Strapped to their tail feathers, trackingdevices kept tabs on the sleek, well-trained andexpensive birds as they pierced the desert sky ona beeline to catch their tasty pigeon dinner. It wasshocking and exciting. Especially after the falcon catches

his prey and you reckless-ly careen at high speedsthrough the desert inMitsubishi 4x4s to chasehim.

The Emirates part ofour trip was mostly

designed for us to have fun. We toured the Gulf in a yachtover dinner, went on a safari, visited every seven star hotelin the country and ate camel in the palace of a man wecalled “Your Excellency”. The wealth that surrounds youthere is so incalculable–Caviar Body Treatment at the Burjal-Arab Hotel is 900 Dirham for instance–that after a

while we simply stopped trying. It is a country obsessedwith the “est”, as in biggest, tallest, largest and best.

Juxtaposing Kuwait with the UAE was unavoidable.“We have a Manhattancoming up next to us thatis making us look like avillage,” bemoaned oneKuwaiti professor. Whenasked what they do onweekends, youngKuwaitis said they “…go to Dubai because there is noth-ing to do here.” Despite this detectable inferiority com-plex, Kuwaitis take pride in upholding the traditions offree speech and democratic participation unique to theircountry.

“Dubai is a revolutionary place, but youcan’t speak your mind,” explained a CEO of oneof Kuwait’s largest investment firms. “Thatdemocratic process is missing in so manyways,” said Dr. Shafeeq al-Gabra, a professor atthe University of Kuwait. “Many of the parlia-mentarians who got elected don’t like democra-cy...religious men elected are confused betweentheir religion and their politics.”

Apart from religious-state issues, anothercomplication to the Kuwaiti system is a law ban-ning political parties. “We have fifty members inParliament,” explained Jassem el-Khorafi,Kuwait’s speaker of parliament, “and I considereach member to be a political party.”

To many Kuwaitis, these men (there arewomen in the cabinet, but none are elected offi-cials) paralyze the legislative decision-makingprocess. “There is no business in Kuwaitbecause they [the parliament] delay everything,”said Waleed al-Nisf, editor in chief of one of

Kuwait’s top news publications.“They talk too much about politics and not enough

about improving Kuwait. Everyone in the Gulf does notwant a parliament because of what happens in Kuwait.”Said Al-Nisf in one of our last meetings in Kuwait, aptlyencapsulating what we saw as a frustrating stasis gripping the country.

Though their differences are stark, in the end, pre-serving the local culture and citizenship has become thegreatest struggle for both Kuwaitis and Emiratis. “Like thewar on terror here, it is a matter of national security forthem,” as one US Foreign Service officer described.

The first men and women born into the independentoil state have fully internalized this worldview. As recent

Continued on page 8

SAIS looks at the Cyprus problem By Niv Elis

As bombs were falling in nearby Gaza, a group of 20 SAIS students and profes-sors gathered in Cyprus for the 4th Conflict Management field trip. Like previ-ous trips to Haiti and Northern Ireland, the program included high-level meetings

with political leaders, academics, civil society groups, and multi-lateral organizations topresent views of the conflict from a multitude of angles. Amidst the busy meetings andtalk of conflict, the colorful silhouettes of families that adorn the Ledra Street bordercrossing in Nicosia, the world’s last divided city, did not convey a sense of brutal con-flict. Students pondered why a conflict that had not seen widespread violence in nearly35 years remained frozen and unresolved.

The conflict of Cyprus is unique and interesting to study. Cyprus, created by treatyin 1960, is a divided island with a dichotomy of Greek-identified and Turkish-identifiedCypriots. When the military junta ruling Greece attempted to integrate the entirety of theisland in 1974, the Turkish military rebuffed on authority of the founding “treaty of guar-antee.” In the violence that ensued, the Turkish and Greek Cypriots segregated, establish-ing the Turkish Republic of North Cyprus (TRNC – recognized only by Turkey), theGreek Cypriot Republic of Cyprus in the South (recognized by everyone but Turkey),and a well-guarded UN buffer zone in between.

EU membership is a major bone of contention. The Republic of Cyprus accededinto the EU after voting overwhelmingly against a UN-sponsored reunification plan in a2004 referendum, on which the Turkish side voted “Yes” in similarly overwhelming pro-

Taking on the GulfBy Nate Rosenblatt

portions. Because the whole island is tech-nically in the EU, residents of the North,whose unrecognized government is not incompliance with EU regulations and stan-dards have ambiguous EU status.

With an impressive level of access, atestament to both the name recognition ofSAIS and the networking abilities ofProfessors I. William Zartman and PhillipT. Hoppman, SAIS students were able to examine all sides of the conflict. Before evenleaving Washington, the group met with ambassadors and representatives from the EU,Greece, the TRNC, and the Republic of Cyprus.

Among the highlights of the trip were meetings with the pro-negotiations Presidentof the unrecognized government of the TRNC, Mehmet Talat. Taking advantage of therare opportunity to question the President of an unrecognized government, the studentswere surprised to learn that recognition was a secondary goal to reunification for TurkishCypriots.

Even Serdar Denktas, the leader of the Democratic Party and son of the intransigentformer TRNC President Rauf Denktas, agreed that a “bi-zonal, bi-communal, federalsolution” would be acceptable, despite preferences for “taksim,” a two-state solution.

In the Republic of Cyprus, the group met with the mayor of Nicosia, the dividedcapital city, who described the successful cooperation with Turkish Cypriot elected lead

Continued on page 8

The Conflict Management Field Trip

Second year Middle East students travel to the Persian Gulf

Second year MES concentrators in the UAE

SAIS students with the mayor of Nicosia on the Greek side of Cyprus.

Niv Ellis (right) and Conflict Management students pose for a picture with a UNFICYPguard in the UN buffer zone.

Dubai is a revolution-ary place, but you can’t

speak your mind

Caviar Body Treatmentat the Burj al-Arab

Hotel is 900 Dirham

Amidst the busy meetings and talkof conflict, the colorful silhouettes

of families that adorn the LedraStreet border crossing in Nicosia,

the world’s last divided city, did notconvey a sense of brutal conflict

February 2009 THE SAIS OBSERVER page 6

Where shall the healing begin? Let me rephrase,in which Muslim capital should PresidentBarack Obama deliver his long-promised

speech in his first 100 days to the over one billion believ-ers of Islam?

As a partisan for then-candidate and now PresidentBarack Obama, I will admit that the excitement of his vic-tory may have blurred my objective analysis on occasion.However, I posed the above question to a number of indi-viduals in Kuwait and the United Arab Emirates duringthe first two weeks of January, when we were still in themuch-hyped period of an American presidential transition.I was fortunate enough to meet government officials, jour-nalists, and business and civil society leaders in thesecountries during a recent SAIS Middle East trip to theregion.

The set of responses that I received in this admitted-ly unscientific and unrepresentativesurvey confirmed that indeed, Mr.Obama’s speech would be welcomedand considered important by manyleaders in the Muslim world. Greaterconclusions cannot be drawn, except tosay that the President seems to have anumber of potential intriguing settingsfor an address that will be judged pri-marily by its substance and not thechoice of location.

Saudi Arabia?

For instance, Mr. Obama couldtake the advice that I heard most oftenand go to the birthplace of Islam: Saudi Arabia. To someindividuals, this is the only option for the President if hewants to speak directly to the Muslim world. An adden-dum about the marginality of Indonesia – where most peo-ple expect him to go because of his time spent there inearly childhood – usually followed this unequivocal rec-ommendation.

Others pointed out the flaws in this thinking, whichpresumes that traditions of religious practice (i.e. the hajand the direction of prayer) still dictate the flow of ideasand discourse through the global Muslim community. Thisis not to say that Indonesia was a popular choice, only thatfor some Saudi Arabia was out of the question, given theintellectual and political restrictions that Mr. Obamawould obviously encounter.

The UAE?

Some of our Emirati hosts naturally nominated theirbooming metropolises of Abu Dhabi and Dubai. Theyargued that Mr. Obama could endorse the astonishing eco-nomic development of these current success stories in theGulf and present the technology, commerce, and prosper-ity of the Emirates as one example to which other Araband Muslim countries could strive.

Despite acknowledging their doubts about replicat-ing the Emirati model, they made a strong case for howthe Emirates and other Gulf economies might serve as cat-alysts for regional change. Nevertheless, Mr. Obamamight want to avoid questions about the role of democra-cy in the maturation of these societies. Likewise, he willno doubt be wary of following in the footsteps of formerPresident George W. Bush, who spoke in Abu Dhabi just

last year.

Baghdad or Ankara?

Finally, two political analystsmade separate cases for Baghdad andAnkara. The political rationale behindthe Iraqi capital is self-explanatoryand probably makes the most sense forthe domestic American audience, ifMr. Obama follows through with hispromise of an expedient drawn-downof American troops.

Ankara carries with it enormoushistorical and political opportunities.As the Saudi analyst asserted, “They

are Sunni, moderate, and geographically important.” Withthat said, the choice might upset some Europeans, depend-ing on Mr. Obama’s position about European Unionaccession.

These responses also reveal the changing dynamicsin the region. There was a time when Cairo and Damascuswould have been on everyone’s list, but today only theEgyptians and Syrians - probably more out of pride andnot conviction - will argue that their capitals representprospects for change and hope in the region.

The challenge for Mr. Obama is to carry a messagethat atones for Bush’s mistakes but also affirms thatAmerica will not return to policies that condoned thepolitical decay in the region over the last three decades.

Obama started this dialogue in his inaugural address

stating, “To the Muslim world, we seek a new way for-ward, based on mutual interest and mutual respect. Tothose leaders around the globe who seek to sow conflict,or blame their society's ills on the West, know that yourpeople will judge you on what you can build, not what youdestroy.”

These lines are imbued with the restorative tenor ofObama’s rhetoricthat helped himclaim victory inNovember. Theymust be combinedwith American poli-cies that will helpleaders in capitalslike Abu Dhabi,Ankara, Jakarta, andeven Baghdad con-solidate their recentachievements.

In rebuilding relations with other parts of the Muslimworld, the key challenge is how to create an operatingenvironment based on mutual respect, while also chal-lenging a dangerous status quo (of which America’s pastpolicies are partially responsible).

No matter where he goes, it is certain that Mr.Obama will have the opportunity to raise the bar of expec-tations that Muslim societies set for themselves. Mr.Obama must therefore demonstrate clearly that the UnitedStates seeks to help those in Cairo, Damascus, Islamabad,and Riyadh to chart a new course. However, he must stressthat this American commitment to partnership dependsfirst and foremost on the decisions to reform and innovatemade by leaders in these capitals.

Emphasizing the importance of internal rather thanexternal dynamics and actors for change would representa bold revision in America’s discourse with the Muslimworld. Indeed, from any Muslim capital, Obama can showan appreciation for the challenges of reform ahead whileoffering steadfast American encouragement and supportfor revolutionary change.

Sean Brooks is a second year Middle East Studies candi-date.

Ba-rock star in the Muslim world

Students for McCain on Obamathere are more significant logistical and legal com-

plexities to the problem than he either realized or admit-ted while campaigning; as a result, the prison may likelystay open longer than planned, to the dismay of his far-left supporters. A good read of the detainees’ biogra-phies and résumés should make anyone think twiceabout releasing them back into the battlefields of theMiddle East. Yet any reputablelawyer can explain the difficultiesof prosecuting them in US criminalcourts. (Few people realize that theformer Administration attempted torelease many of them, but that thedetainee’s home countries rejectedthem—we suspect it wasn’tbecause they had too many parkingtickets. Others who were released have already returnedto their violent pasts.) For these reasons, the President’sproven intellect will hopefully help him to balance allaspects of this complex problem.

President Obama’s economic policies reflect thedifficulties that any newly elected official must face –balancing the expectations created on the campaign trailwith the pragmatic realities of governing. In his cam-paign, Obama sounded like a free-marketer’s nightmare,supporting farm subsidies, criticizing the windfall profitsearned by oil companies, and extolling the virtues ofunions. Yet from his transition and early weeks in office,

Obama’s true economic inclinations are harder to per-ceive.

Obama’s economic policies suggest twotrends that stoke the intrigue of most conserva-tives. First, he has decided to make the economya priority for his Administration. Every morning,he receives a thirty-minute report on the econo-

my from the Director of theNational Economic Council.His unapologetic supportfor fiscal stimulus showsthat he is committed tojump-starting economic growthand limiting the fallout of the cur-rent recession. Anecdotally, he hasmoved the entire staff of the

Council of Economic Advisors, the President’s ad hocin-house think-tank, from its remote location in down-town Washington, D.C. to the West Wing of the WhiteHouse. Clearly, he has shown a renewed commitment tothe economy.

Perhaps most importantly, Obama has chosen tosurround himself with an all-star cast of economic advi-sors. The aforementioned Director of the NEC, LarrySummers, is a seasoned economic technocrat, spanningseveral Presidential Administrations since Reagan’s firstterm and administrative posts at Harvard University andthe World Bank. His choice to head the Council of

Economic Advisors, Christy Romer, is an economic his-torian with a deep understanding of the Great

Depression. She recent-ly co-wrote a paperarguing that highertaxes stymie economicgrowth. TimothyGeithner, Obama’s pickto lead the TreasuryDepartment, is a youth-ful, intelligent, manage-ment-savvy economic

regulator. The teamsurroundingPresident Obama ishighly qualified andwell respected byconservatives.Though we remaincautious and skepti-cal of how for liber-al Obama can go inmeeting conserva-tive needs and desire, his presidency is certainly on thepath of uniting the country around key issues in a bipar-tisan manner.Phillip Kreck is a second year Strategic Studies candi-date.

By Sean P. Brooks

Emphasizing the impor-tance of internal ratherthan external dynamicsand actors for change

would represent a boldrevision in America’s

discourse with theMuslim world

Which Muslim country should the President visit first?

(continued from p.1)

It is impossible to ignore the ener-gy and excitement that PresidentObama has brought to Washingtonand the country. This “nationaloptimism” is a welcome reliefafter years of despondency

President Obama’s decision tokeep Secretary of Defense Gatesis significant. No other singledecision did more to ease theanxiety of security-minded con-servatives and help us allbreathe a sigh of relief

The challenge for Mr.Obama is to carry a mes-

sage that atones forBush’s mistakes but alsoaffirms that America willnot return to policies that

condoned the politicaldecay in the region over

the last three decades

February 2009 THE SAIS OBSERVER page 7

Cold, T ired and SqueezedReflections on Inauguration Day

By Gabriel Serrato

In early January, I was considering my options forgetting out of town. I could rent out my apartment,make some quick cash and take a nice vacation leavingDC to the befuddled masses for the weekend. Theswearing-in of President Barack Obama was going to beaccompanied by droves of crowds who would invade myadopted city like swarms of locusts. Millions of beam-ing Americans ready to Twitter and Facebook their jour-ney into history were going to descend on the Capitol –and they all planned on getting onmy nerves.

They were going to overcrowdevery place I needed to go, stand onthe left side of the escalator, andbring abundant supplies of tackyclothes, souvenirs and anything elsethey could print, embroider orBedazzle Obama’s name and face on.

Partly through my own historical curiosity, butmostly out of laziness, I ended up staying in D.C for theinauguration. And while the massive mob of my excitedcountrymen satisfied all of my expectations, I realizedthat there was nowhere else in the world I would ratherbe than in freezing Washington D.C. for that weekend.

For me, the experience of inauguration weekenddid not hinge on the moment Obama recited the finalwords of his oath of office. While I recognized theimportance of our nation’s first black president and theintroduction of our new quasi-royal family, it was themasses themselves that I found most inspiring. Millionsof sleep deprived Americans squeezed together shoulderto shoulder for endless hours while exposed to the freez-ing cold should have been a recipe for disaster. Insteadit produced a national camaraderie that I neither expectednor had experienced in my lifetime.

On Inauguration morning, I stood for nine hoursdirectly in front of the MSNBC booth at 7th andJefferson, nearly a mile away from the action. I was sur-

rounded by freez-ing tourist andlocals from allwalks of life,excited to usher ina new era ofAmerican history.As I tried to pro-tect my six inches

of personal space, I made small talkwith those around me. Many werequite clear that Obama had erasedtheir cynicism in American politicsand had renewed their faith in theAmerican spirit. Others literally

breathed sighs of relief as they reflected on the end ofeight years that were concluding with two-protractedwars and economic uncertainty.

When the lines of Hollywood celebrities began tofile on to the inauguration stage everyone around meseemed to forget that their toes were frozen and theirlegs were weary from standing.

After a historically long campaign season, a bitterrace between candidates trying to out-campaign promiseeach other, and two terms of what many around me con-sidered historic ineptitude, it was finally show time.

It is difficult to explain the feeling of two millionpeople cheering, jeering and singing together in unison,but as we got closer to 11:55am the symphony ofAmericans on The Mall seemed to embody the spirit ofnational unity that Obama had promised.

Millions of Americans covering every piece of realestate from the Capitol to the Lincoln Memorial focusedall of their emotions on one man and turned an amor-phous campaign slogan of hope and change into discern-able reality.

Four years ago I attended the second inaugurationof George W. Bush, thinking I wouldn’t be in DC longenough to see another inauguration. Absent were thecelebrities, bitter cold, and about a million and a halfpeople. I literally could not give away two extra tickets,which today sit in my desk drawer as one my firstWashington DC keepsakes.

There was no hope for change, only the comfort ofthe status quo. Therewere no hordes ofcrowds reflecting thediversity of the nation.There was no air ofnational mandate tounify the country.Bush had squeezed outa second hotly contest-ed race for the presi-dency and his inauguration felt more like a formality toretain power than a celebration of American democracy.

Comparing Bush’s second inauguration to Obama’sfirst is a bit unfair, but what it reveals is the rejuvenatedspirit of the American people. Millions of people togeth-er on The Mall and millions more watching across thecountry reevaluated their skepticism in government andwere excited in the role they would play in reinvigorat-ing the American spirit.

Obama’s inauguration weekend was physicallydemanding. Between concerts, balls and the swearing-initself, I calculated that I stood among freezing strangersfor more than thirty hours. And while I regret notbundling up enough and certainly miss the $2,000 Icould have gotten for my apartment, there is no place inthe world I would have rather been than among the densefreezing crowd of hopeful Americans on that NationalMall.

Gabriel Serrato is a first year Strategic Studies candi-date.

The 2009 Inauguration of Barack Obama was sup-posed to be an extraordinary event. Meaning should havesuffused everything, the weather, Lincoln’s Bible, the col-ors of scarves and ties, Vice President Cheney’s wheel-chair, the collapse of Senators Byrd and Kennedy.

Only a transcendent context could move theSmithsonian to seek Aretha Franklin’s great gray wingeddog bowl of a hat as an item of historical note, and notmerely a testament to the art of steam-punk haberdashery.

But the thing we were all supposed to have palpita-tions over was not the hat. No, it was quite simple, theman swearing the oath of Presidency was a son of Africa.

This was, no doubt, a huge deal.I knew the import ofthe moment. I voted for Obama. I’m from Illinois and methim at a constituency meeting two years ago. I read andloved Dreams from My Father. I ran in the streets whenhe won, and I misted up—OK, wept like grass on a dewymorn—during his acceptance speech in Grant Park.

Why was it then, that duringInauguration I didn’t feel much? Whydidn’t I feel as if I were swimming inthe river of history?

It could be, I suppose, that I havean appreciation for free food and drink.To be blunt, I’m a glutton. Instead ofhuddling around the jumbotrons on thefrigid Mall with the masses, searchingfor the significance of it all, I was swim-ming in the great gravy bowl of DClargesse.

At Rosa Mexicana on Martin Luther King Day Ispent a good three hours thrusting various corn-basedproducts into a stone vat of freshly pummeled avocados.There were also shrimp skewers, pigs in blankets, andcheesecake bites. I had my first pomegranate margarita,delicious and packed with antioxidants. I believe I am set,as far as antioxidants go, for quite some time.

Later that night, at an Obama booster’s home inDupont I had my first ever bacon-wrapped scallops. Thislittle dish is, in my opinion, the nonpareil ofnon-Kosher, all-protein, surf ‘n turf, culinaryduets.

At yet another event I had crab cakes,prosciutto, a lovely cheese platter and winewith a seven foot Greek communist. Weshared an admiration for the kalamata olivesand bruschetta. He suggested betweenmouthfuls that Obama did not represent theinterests of the proletariat, or something likethat. I wasn’t really listening, and his mouth was full offood.

The next morning I couldn’t bring myself and mydistended gut to get up early enough to get a spot on theMall. So I accepted an invitation to watch the inaugura-tion in a corporate boardroom of extraordinary comfort

and style.We sat in red leather chairs

and watched coverage from threechannels on three large flat-screenTV’s. Though the office was onlyfour blocks from the Capital, Icouldn’t see the Mall itself. I could,I think, hear the crowd’s roarthrough the office windows.

The event was catered. Imissed Rick Warren’s benedictiondue to the arrival of a sublime

salmon pâté, which went well on everything: bread, crack-ers, toast, bagels, muffins, biscuits, buns, ham, and piecesof smoked salmon (something I call “death by salmon”).

Eva, my companion by the salmon pâté bowl and anAfrican American consultant from Upper Marlboro said,“Never thought I’d see this in my lifetime.” She was inher fifties, and had grown up in Georgia. She said she’d

been denied food at restaurants even through the 1970s.Here we were now, sharing a sublime salmon pâté. I

told her that I’d never had such sub-lime salmon, and was glad therewas plenty of it so we didn’t haveto cross crackers.

By the time Obama was givena chance to talk, I was quite stuffedand ready for a rousing speech. Iexpected soaring imagery and mem-orable phrases, the kind of tri-umphant “yes we can” homiletic

that made me want to swing from light posts on electionnight. I wanted to be moved.

I was disappointed. The President sounded like a man-ager at a grocery store where I worked in high school,standing disapprovingly before us in the break room,exhorting us to punch our time cards correctly and makesure to put little bags around leaky chicken so as to preventit from leaking on the cash register. “For everywhere welook,” he said, “there is work to be done.”

When it was done I grabbed my jacket, took a fewsalmon-smeared crackers for the trip back, and headedhome. Around me were the people who’d been on the mall.I could feel how cold they were, and how much they’dgone through. Because there were no cars the city seemedeerily silent.

I finished off the last of the crackers. Tomorrow, areturn to classes. No more salmon pâté or bacon wrappedscallops. It set in: there is work to be done.

Kevin Cross is a first year M.A. candidate in Middle EastStudies.

A stomach’s eye view of inaugurationMusings on the events, crowds and food of inauguration weekend

Only a transcendent contextcould move the Smithsonian to

seek Aretha Franklin’s greatgray-winged dog bowl of a hat

as an item of historical note, andnot merely a testament to the art

of steam-punk haberdashery.

I was surrounded by freezingtourist and locals from all walksof life, excited to usher in a new

era of American history

Millions of people togetheron The Mall and millionsmore watching across thecountry reevaluated theirskepticism in government

Meaning should have suffusedeverything, the weather,

Lincoln’s Bible, the colors ofscarves and ties, VicePresident Cheney’s

wheelchair.

By Kevin Cross

February 2009 THE SAIS OBSERVER page 8

Political Crisis Recedes in CanadaBy Jamie Huckabay

Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper success-fully passed his federal budget on February 4thwith the support of the opposition Liberal Party,

marking a return to the uneasy status quo in Canadianpolitics. The fate of the Conservative minority govern-ment has been in doubt since the three opposition partiesattempted to form an unprecedented coalition to toppleMr. Harper two months after a general election.

Canada’s staid political culture was shaken loose bythe proposed coalition as supporters of both sides stagedpublic demonstrations. The Liberal Party would have beenthe senior partner in a government with the left-wing NewDemocratic Party, and supported in the legislature by theseparatist Bloc Quebecois from Quebec.

Prime Minister Harper took to the airwaves todenounce the proposed alliance with the Bloc as a “betray-al” of the country and “undemocratic.” Conservative sup-port exploded outside Quebec from 37% to50% and the party set new fundraisingrecords. After a tense 2 hour meeting with theGovernor General (the head of state), Mr.Harper secured the prorogation – or tempo-rary suspension – of Parliament until the end of January toprevent the coalition from voting down the government.

Soon thereafter, the coalition began to show signs ofinstability. The then-leader of the Liberal Party, StephaneDion, had just suffered the worst electoral result for theparty in decades and had agreed to resign shortly.Opponents of the coalition within the party soon forcedMr. Dion’s ouster, short-circuiting the selection process toinstall human rights expert and formerHarvard professor Michael Ignatieff asleader.

Mr. Ignatieff played coy until the budg-et was unveiled, extracting a high politicalprice from the Prime Minister for his support.The budget is brimming with ‘stimulus’goodies that send the country into deficit forthe first time in 12 years.

But what caused this unprecedented and‘un-Canadian’ crisis? It stemmed from Mr. Harper’sattempt to eliminate all public subsidies for federal politi-cal parties. The opposition parties are heavily dependenton the $1.95 per vote subsidy to fund day-to-day partyoperations and retire campaign debt. Critics have arguedthat this clause was intended to bankrupt the oppositionparties and cripple their campaign capacity for future elec-

tions.Supporters argue that the policy would particularly

punish the Bloc Quebecois, who receive95% of their total funding from the federalgovernment. Eliminating these supportswould weaken the party and create oppor-tunities for federalist parties, Liberal and

Conservative alike, to secure electoral victory.On the whole, the episode has left the Conservative

government in a weakened position, although their publicsupport has not diminished. The media has decidedlyplaced the blame on Mr. Harper. The Prime Minister alsofaces a formidable foe in Mr. Ignatieff, who is seeminglyoff to a strong start as leader. The Liberal Party does notappear keen for an election, as they are satisfied to let the

government wear the recession. Mr. Harperis eager for a fresh start, beginning withPresident Obama’s first foreign visit toCanada on February 19th.

SAIS students may be asking: howdoes this relate to my regional interests?The Canadian calamity speaks to howpolitical parties relate to the state.Eliminating supports for subsidy-depend-ent parties caused an immediate and drastic

reaction. After all, these programs are usually designed tothe mutual benefit of all involved. Once these programsare in place, political parties will never relinquish thecomfort of cold, hard cash.

Jamie Huckabay is a first year M.A. student in theCanadian Studies program.

According to Dean Wilson, SAIS has not beenhit the hardest and the main campus administrationwill not supply additional funds to SAIS studentsthat are facing financial adversity.

In addition to launching the fundraising cam-paign, the SAIS administration created two addition-al initiatives to address student needs. Traditionally,international students have relied on savings andloans from their home countries. This makes interna-tional students particularly vulnerable to exchangerate differences.

Korean students saw the value of their savingsslashed by almost 50% when the Korean Won(KRW) lost most of its value in relation to the USdollar. The magnitude of such a financial loss couldhave placed an overwhelming burden on these stu-dents, prohibiting their continued attendance andpossibly impacting their academic performance.SAIS’s administration stepped in and provided aid tocurb withdrawal of Korean students.

Bart Dakulich, Director of Finance andAdministration at SAIS Bologna, helped studentsthat hold EU citizenship secure low interestUniCredit student loans to continue their secondyear at SAIS’s DC. Unfortunately, the value of theloans that these students secured for their expensesdeclined significantly, due to the decline in the valueof the Euro in relation to the US dollar. Once again,the SAIS administration was able to temporarilyhelp students so that they could continue their stud-ies.

Prime MinisterHarper took to the

airwaves to denouncethe proposed alliance

with the Bloc as a“betrayal” of the

country

Canada’s staidpolitical culture

was shaken loose

In these two instances, the SAIS administrationsucceeded in helping students in financial peril andare continuing to plan for the class of 2011.

The SAIS administration simultaneously cutcosts in order to give as much help to current andincoming students as in previous years. For exam-ple, less expensive caterers were contracted forSAIS events and the SAIS catalogue will now arrivein admitted students’ email boxes instead of in themail. Not printing the SAIS catalogue saves theschool approximately $70,000 as well as lots oftrees!

Staff across the board made sacrifices in orderto assist students. The staff holiday party, for one,was a more subdued affair, according to NoemiCrespo, Director of Financial Aid.

The SAIS Career Services office created initia-tives to facilitate current students long-term careerplans, to create winning resumes, get summer intern-ships, and eventually a full-time job. The Office ofCareer Services has also designated one person intheir office to work exclusively with recent SAISgrads and alumni to ensure that they find jobs.Unfortunately, staff, students and faculty alike havebeen adversely affected by this current economicdownturn. However, the SAIS global community haspulled together to help and support each other anyway they can.

Masha Bolotinskaya is a member of the Central AsiaCaucusus Institute at SAIS.

Financial crisis at SAIScontinued from page 1

ers for practical issues such as sewage. She pointedout that to get around the issue of non-reconition, theGreek Cypriots had to consider their counterparts asprivate citizens, not as mayors. One participant notedthat cooperation seems to be possible among eventhe worst of enemies if the alternative is “swimmingin your own excrement.”

Other meetings included university professors,political party leaders, think tank participants, andone delightful evening of Cypriot wine and food.

On a tour of the U.N. buffer zone, the groupsaw sections of Nicosia frozen in time since theinception of the buffer zone in 1974, including adver-tisements, stores, and cars abandoned in the fighting.The UN commanders, some of whom had served inplaces like Darfur, emphasized the difference in theirexperiences: in Darfur, violations included murders,shootings, village raids, and rape; in Cyprus, com-plaints included people painting barrels around theguard posts, and disputes over whether the bufferzone started at building fronts or the edge of the bal-conies protruding from those buildings. Even recol-lections of violence were tinged with absurdity; thelast act of violence, sometime in the early 1980’s,involved a Turkish Cypriot guard shooting a GreekCypriot who had run across the buffer zone, stolenthe Turkish flag, and bared his bottom in taunting.

Since returning from Cyprus the group has metwith former UN Special Envoy to Cyprus, Alvaro deSoto, and a representative from the Turkish Embassy.Using the rich material from meetings, interviewsand field observation, the participants returned fromCyprus and continued their work through papers onthe various aspects of analysis on the conflict andrecommendations for how to move forward. Thepapers will be edited, compiled into a book, and sentto the various groups with which SAISers met, inhopes that they will take the students’ suggestions toheart.

For students of conflict management, the trip isone of the best opportunities to put the theory of theirclasses into practice; a quick glance throughSAISworks will reveal very few postings for“Conflict Managers,” making the experience uniqueindeed.

The willingness of the Greek and TurkishCypriots to come back to the negotiating table hascreated hope that 2009 will be a year of progress fora conflict that all agree has needlessly persisted toolong. Hopefully, the suggestions and ideas put forthby the Conflict Management field trip participantswill help push the process along.

Niv Ellis is a second year M.A. candidate in ConflictManagement.

university graduates, this generation sees citizen-ship as entitlement, “You may come and workhere,” one of our more enigmatic hosts explained,“and you may stay for even thirty years, but ulti-mately you are a guest in our country. This land isnot yours, it’s ours.”

As night fell on our “dune bashing” excursion,we were invited to sit by the fire of a desert camp.When a safe amount of time passed after dinner,there was dancing and our hosts invited us on stageto teach us some traditional dance moves. Oncethey felt satisfied that we understood its basic con-cept, we were left onstage. The dancing went onthroughout the night, to the tune of a timeless,seemingly unending, local beat. But after a whilewe found we were dancing alone.

In retrospect that night, fun as it was, illumi-nated a cold, sobering truth about the Emirates: forall its Sorbonnes and Free Trade Zones, it is not aplace any of us could call home. We were treatedlike royalty and encouraged to return, but only asguests, kept at bay by a sense of belonging jealous-ly guarded.

Nate Rosenblatt is a second year ME studies can-didate.

SAIS students in the GulfContined from page 5

Cyprus TripContinued from page 5

February 2009 THE SAIS OBSERVER page 9

Mr. SAIS 2009 Co-Winners:Brian Stout and Aart Greens

Mr. SAIS 2009 in Pictures

New York Career Trek Addresses Gender IssuesBy Jessica Lamberston and Samantha Watson

Career Service’s New York City Career Trek exam-ined gender issues in an unprecedented way this January.More than 75% of alumni speakers on the trek workedon engaging women in development, tools for empower-ment, and gender focused strategies. Meanwhile, thealumni discussed general career advice, family roles,accommodating settings for familyissues, and work-life balance.

With gender lacking in the SAIScurriculum and gender mobility issuespertinent for SAIS faculty, the CareerTrek refreshingly included organiza-tions that are primarily focused onwomen's issues and gender, with themajority of the speakers (11 out of 12)being female and in relatively high positions.

Throughout the trip, students had the opportunity totravel to different high ranking and important organiza-tions - the very places many students will apply to oncethey complete their SAIS education.

The career advice given by the many individualswho spoke provided insight and support for male andfemale students alike. Sarina Beges, Senior Coordinatorof Synergos' Arab World Social Innovators, advised stu-dents to take at least one IDEV course, saying it was themissing piece she really wished she had from her SAISeducation.

In a field so reliant on common interactions, thespeakers discussed tools for utilizing already establishednetworks, and how to form new ones. Susannah Leisher,Director of Programs at Trickle Up, discussed using hernetwork to advance her career. While living abroad,Leisher planned a trip to the US with specific back toback meetings set up to aid in her networking, which shemade clear was a necessary asset for success in any

career. Be it with micro finance, international politics, orhuman rights relief work, connections pro-vide the basis for interaction.

All but one of the institutions visitedstressed the need for 2-3 years of consecu-tive experience abroad. Programs like UN

Volunteers, P2 level UN posi-tions in Peacekeeping missions,Peace Corps and the like werestrongly recommended. Leisherencouraged students to “pack upand go” with or without a pro-gram. Many students felt frus-trated with this advice. Givenlarge student loan payments and

the need to support one’s family, the “packup and go” strategy seemed feasible for few.

Jane Buchanan of Human RightsWatch, Susannah Leisher of Trickle UP, andKristina Koch-Avan from the UN all spokeabout gender roles and work-life balance. Leisherdescribed an arrangement she had made with her hus-band; she stayed home with her children while her hus-band was the breadwinner and then after a set number ofyears they switched roles. It was encouraging to hear thishigh-ranking woman speak positively about her opportu-nity to return to the workforce, and her husbands willing-ness to assume the caretaker role.

Buchanan discussed how her research trips abroadhad to be shorter than previously in order to accommo-date her family arrangement. She spoke highly of thewillingness of Human Rights Watch to allow time forresearchers freshly back from the field to attend to fami-ly care, and of their ability to accommodate schedules,both in and out of country to facilitate work-life balance.

Some students expressed concern with the trend oflarge sacrifices being placed upon successfuland talented women. First year studentAmanda Moderson-Kox recalled that thespeakers discussed sacrifices they had tomake and she found it disconcerting. In onlyone instance did it seem that the male spousewas making equal career sacrifices.

The tight balance between home andwork that exists for most women in theworkforce seems even more stressed forfemales seeking jobs in the competitiveworld of development and internationalorganizations.

The Career Trek highlighted the impor-tance of knowledge in gender theory andissues for a successful career in internationalrelations and development. For the majorityof alumni presenters, gender issues were apart of daily work. Given the meager cover-

age of gender issues in the SAIS curriculum, one won-ders if SAISers are at a disadvantage.

At the same time, career advice demonstrated theincreased burden placed on women through family roles.The young women of SAIS increasingly need an exam-ple of the capabilities of women, not the struggles.Although the Career Center's NYC Trek provided price-less tools for the students who attended, and more fullyaddressed gender issues than many other areas of SAIS,it is clear that there is still a long way to go for full andfair participation for women, in both the workforce andthe world.

Jessica Lamberston is a first year M.A candidate inLASP. Samantha Watson is an M.A.3 concentrating in IP.

The young women ofSAIS increasingly needan example of the capa-bilities of women, not

the struggles

continued from page 1Dating at SAIS

help it. How do you act under these kinds of circumstances? One interviewee answered, “If there is a silence, you know that things are not going

well. You have to just start to improvise and talk about politics or econometrics.” Thisalways works between SAISers. However, personally I think silence can be very relax-ing if I feel comfortable with the person.

How do we deal with the situation if things do not work out? Dating a SAISermeans, if you split up, you will be seeing that person every day. Our environment is sosmall and particular that it makes it a little difficult to avoid uncomfortable situations, socommunication is important.

“One simple truth is that when nerds date it is never simple” a self proclaimed nerd

February 2009 THE SAIS OBSERVER page 10

The Enlightenment was a time of great change in Europeas new art forms, technologies, political systems, andreligions emerged. While every Westerner has learned

about the visible changes of this period, few people understandthat the Enlightenment was a development in consciousnessitself, not a mere shift in ideas.

In fact, most of the ideas that emerged at this time onlyexisted in post-Enlightenment consciousness. By understand-ing the developing nature of consciousness on our planet, prac-titioners of International Relations can gain new insight into therich tapestry of the human condition.

Prior to the Enlightenment, 2-dimensional (2D) con-sciousness predominated in the West. To a person in 2D consciousness, reality is char-acterized by two poles mutually sustaining each other, creat-ing a closed system. Good and evil, God and Devil, faith andheresy, noble and peasant; the 2D universe is rigid and fixed,and the autonomous individual has yet to emerge from it’spolarities. During this period, the Earth was conceptualized asa flat disc and time was measured by the repetitive cycles ofnature

During the Enlightenment, 3D consciousness beganexpressing itself. To 3D humans, reality is an open system inwhich the closed loop of 2D polarity can be reconciled by athird point.

Good and evil are transcended by free will, God andDevil are set apart from man, faith and heresy are testedagainst reason, nobles and peasants become citizens.

Most importantly, the autonomous individual begins tostand apart from his surroundings and even from time itself.After the Enlightenment, the Earth was seen as a sphere,while time was perceived as linear and segmented intoabstract units such as hours and weeks.

To further clarify the point, let’s look at theEnlightenment’s intellectual forefather, Saint Augustine ofHippo (died 430 AD). In his early adulthood, St. Augustinebelonged to a sect of Christians called Manicheans, whobelieved that the universe was split into Good and Evil. Theseforces manifested themselves through man, who could onlypassively accept the evil done through him and pray that theforces of good would prevail. Manicheans had no concept offree will or an individuated soul, and clearly expressed their 2Dconsciousness in their belief that the individual is completelysubsumed by two poles.

After a decade as a Manichean, St. Augustine became dissatisfied, saying, “I couldmake no progress in it.” He turned to Plato (the original 3D thinker) and integratedPlato’s ideas of the separate soul, free will, and reason into Christianity. As St.

Augustine’s writings spread through the Christian world,the seeds were sown for 3D consciousness to eventuallyemerge.

A thousand years later, in 1336, the Enlightenmentsymbolically began when Francesco Petrarch climbed Mt.Ventoux, becoming the first European to climb a mountainsimply to enjoy the view. To fully grasp the significance ofthis act, imagine yourself standing at the peak of a moun-tain, gazing down at the landscape stretching out to thehorizon. Feel the exhilaration and isolation of this posi-tion; there is no denying that you are a separate individualwho stands apart from the flat surface of the Earth.

This act symbolized Petrarch’s individuation from the 2D consciousness of histime. Significantly, he carried a copy of Augustine’sConfessions with him. Petrarch went on to become afamous poet, scholar, and philosopher whose worksinspired the Italian Renaissance.

As the Enlightenment progressed, 3D conscious-ness manifested itself in a variety of ways. Paintingsbegan to have perspective and depth, while the subject ofart turned from religious to human themes. MartinLuther’s Reformation (inspired by St. Augustine) assert-ed that every individual had the capacity to interpretGod’s will for himself. Francis Bacon’s “ScientificInquiry” posited that man could discern truth by examin-ing his environment, an act requiring man to first standback and differentiate himself from his surroundings.

The Constitution of the United States was based onindividual rights, creating a country dedicated to 3D con-sciousness. Adam Smith’s Wealth of Nations theorizedthat individuals acting on their own behalf would create

an ideal economy, in contrast to the fixed economies offeudal Europe. And the list goes on….

For practitioners of International Relations who wishto understand our troubled planet, it is absolutely essentialto see beneath the surface and grasp that consciousness onthis planet is slowly evolving from 2D to 3D. While thisshift has accelerated in the last few decades, we are stillliving in a world predominated by pre-Enlightenment con-sciousness. While this situation is not inherently bad, it isvery dangerous when misunderstood. Therefore, as you gothrough your career, be sensitive not only to different ideas

and cultures, but also to fundamentally different types of consciousness.

Paul Alois is first-year M.A. candidate in International Law and president of theIntegral Theory Club.

What was the Western Enlightenment?By Paul Alois

For practitioners of InternationalRelations who wish to understandour troubled planet, it is absolutelyessential to see beneath the surface

and grasp that consciousness on thisplanet is slowly evolving from 2D to

3D.

and SAISer explained. Nothing is simple in this life, at least not in the environment ofSAIS. But, after we have passed Microeconomics and International Trade without sleep-ing for days in a row, we can handle anything right?

Given all of this, should dating a SAISer be considered a plus? Before, I thoughtthat dating a SAISer was not an option;the classroom is a rocky environmentfor new relationships to bloom, andeveryone is so focused on their cours-es there seems little time left forromance. But, dating a SAISer mayhave its advantages. You are certain toshare the same interests about politics,economics, development, and an inter-national perspective about social reali-ty. Given mutually hectic schedule,you can understand each other’s lackof time. Sharing the same environment and the same friends makes it easier for you tospend more time with your partner, even if it’s in the library.

In the end, it does not matter if you are dating someone from SAIS or not. You mayconnect with someone from the outside world. What makes the relationship workdepends all on you and how willing you are to act with maturity and honesty to commu-nicate with your partner. The secret may be a lot of patience and communication, and agood friendship. As one of my interviewees said:A healthy relationship is like a healthy garden–you need to constantly tend to it and addressthose small weeds’ so that they do not becomebig weeds and ruin what you care about.”

The author of this article chose to remain anonymous.

By understanding the developingnature of consciousness on our plan-

et, practitioners of InternationalRelations can gain new insight into

the rich tapestry of the human condition.

Before, I thought that dating aSAISer was just not an option;

the classroom is a rocky environ-ment for new relationships to

bloom, and everyone is sofocused on their courses there

seems little time left for romance

A painting of Jerusalem.

Dear SAIS Guy:

I’m still in the library, still procrastinating from writing a 30 page paper from lastsemester, and still trying to come up with a good New Year’s resolution. Any suggestions?– Late in the Library

Dear Late:It is that time of the year again. Time to reflect on all of the crazy stuff that’s hap-

pened to you in 2008 and promise 2009 will be different, or better, or that you’ll start act-ing like an adult. Aside from the obvious (youshould probably start your papers a little fur-ther in advance), here are some SAISer sam-ple New Years resolutions:

Spend more time with SAIS classmatesand get to know some of the fascinating peo-ple we are lucky enough to go to school with.Remember last semester how quickly wewent from class to exams to – suddenly every-one was gone! It’s like that every term. Makea point to get to know each other before we alldisperse.

Read more before class. We all do ourreading, right? Well, we skim at least. Ok, well, most people do most of their reading.Classes can be that much more enriching if we come prepared. Some professors are smartand use techniques like reading summaries and cold-calling to keep us prepared.Consider this next time you see that number in the “amount owed to JHU” line on yourISIS statement. Are you getting your money’s worth from your classes?

Attend more speakers and panels. Think of all this extra brainpower provided at no

additional charge to your SAIS experience. Force yourself to ask questions at events. It’sgood practice for later in life whenyou get 30 second with your CEO inthe company elevator.

Take up a non-SAIS activity.Frisbee? Pedicures? Tuesday nightshave been my traditional non-SAISnights. Last January I took up yoga,this year it’s beer and hot wings. Butwhatever your interest, get out ofschool for a couple of hours each week. Grad school doesn’t provide a lot of downtime,so get some when you can.

Do something to give back to DC or the SAIS community. There has to be a littlepublic interest deep within us to be here, right? Don’t forget there’s a whole city out therethat could use your help. Tutor little kids, help low income DCers complete their taxes,clean up after yourself in the cafeteria, or write a column for the SAIS Observer!

Take advantage of being in DC. It may not be America’s most exciting city, but theinaugural season and confirmation hearings put the world’s attention back on DC.There’s a lot to do here. Take some time to venture outside of Dupont.

Those are a few suggestions. As for me, my 2009 resolution will probably involveremembering more of my Saturday nights. – SAISGuy

Remember, email your suggested activity to do before you graduate, along with questions for future issues, to matt.kaczmarek@jhu.edu and the best will appear in nextmonth’s column.

Matt Kaczmarek is a second year M.A. candidate in Latin American Studies.

February 2009 THE SAIS OBSERVER page 11

Ask the SAIS GuyBy Matt Kaczmarek

Remember last semesterhow quickly we went from

class to exams to – sud-denly everyone was gone!

Make a point to get toknow each other before

we all disperse.

Force yourself to ask questionsat events. It’s good practice for

later in life when you get 30 sec-ond with your CEO in the com-

pany elevator.

The SAIS Guy answers your questions each month onlove, life, and SAIS. Today’s topics: the top 10 things to dobefore you graduate, and New Year’s resolutions.

Dear SAIS Guy:First semester flew by. Give me a rundown of the

things I need to do to make the most of my SAIS experience.– The Mass Ave Maniac

Dear Maniac:Alright man, you’ve asked for it. Behold the long-

awaited, first time to be published,

TOP 15 THINGS TO DO BEFORE YOU GRADUATE FROM SAIS

15. Insert your own here. Email your suggested list item tomatt.kaczmarek@jhu.edu and the best will appear in next month’s column.

14. Start dating a fellow SAISer just to see if you can keep it a secret for morethan a week.

You won’t be able to, I promise. It helps even more if the love blossoms on a SAIS-affiliated trip abroad. You know who you are, fake-secret-couples!

13. Rearrange a shelf of books in the library.Seriously, have you ever seen anyone check out a non-reserve book? I don’t think

so. I’ve been advocating for almost two years to take out all of the books and replacethem with student workspaces. We do our research online now. Why not?

12. Buy a really nice expensive present for your Monetary TA, even if you tookthe course last spring.

It brings good luck. Trust me.

11. Take the “week-long-meal-event-challenge.”

Try to feed yourself, three meals a day, fora whole week solely by attending events withfree food. You’ll be more successful than youthink, but by the end you’ll for sure be overGeppetto’s tapenade.

10. Reserve a group study room for thetwo most popular hours one day each week but never show up.

Ok, this has got to be the douchiest item on this list, but clearly it happens all thetime. First, it’s ridiculous that we only have two group study rooms when we have agazillion people in the first year class. Second, you should really use the room or cancelyour reservation if you don’t need it anymore. But, as long as no one plays by the rules,let’s have some fun.

9. Drink the Mad Dog in the fridge.You know the one. You’ve seen that one beer in the refrigerator door in the base-

ment of Nitze that looks like Paul Nitze himself probably left it there. That’s right…drink it. Just do it. Don’t tell anyone. Then later replace it so someone else can share theadventure.

8. Join SAISPride.

If you think you know how to have some fun in Dupont, just wait until you go outwith the SAIS gays. Email saispride@jhu.edu to get on the guest list, and night afternight, watch your calendar fill up with crazy memories. That, and, you might be surprisedby who else you see out.

7. Write your significant other’s business school applications.You came to SAIS because it felt good to balance that market-oriented, laissez-

faire, radical free trader drive and determination with a little do-gooder democracy pro-motion, foreign aid, and microfinance warm fuzzy, but now you’re starting to feel soft.Still think you can get into Harvard Business School? Go for it. What’s the worst thatcould happen? As Professor Wedgwood says (and these are words I live by): “In life, dowhat makes you happy; but if you do, marry up.”

6. Make out with Mr. SAIS.I know, hot. He’s like a mascot, but (hope-

fully) less furry. Plus, he embarrassed himself infront of the whole school. You might as wellmake him feel like the whole thing was worth it.

5. Find a way to use the Dean’s privatebathroom.

This one may be an urban legend. She mayor may not have her own en suite facilities. Butif it’s true, you know what to do.

4. Try to take a cookie before 4:00 PM on Tuesday.You won’t be able to. If you thought the cafeteria staff means business while mak-

ing sandwiches, you should see the way they guard those cookies.

3. Get a job after you graduate.No, really, it’d be really helpful, for all of us.

2. Pre-marg.The pre-marg is an ultra exclusive SAIS ritual. Pre-marg is a verb, officially mean-

ing the process of enjoying a margarita before a SAIS event. It could be happy hour,prom, Frisbee on the mall, a financial industry career panel, or even at 9:30 Mondaymorning before that 10:15 class. It doesn’t even have to be a margarita. Pina Coladas,vodka red-bulls, and the aforementioned Mad Dog are all valid substitutes.

And, the #1 thing to do before you graduate…

1. Make out behind the Berlin wall during happy hour.Spring is almost here. The weather is getting warmer. Soon happy hour will be out-

side, and there it stands, the shining pinnacle of anyone’s SAIS career. The fall of theBerlin Wall represented the triumph of representative capitalist democracy over the total-itarian centrally-planned economy. Be sure to make this memory yours before you headout into real life. When the mood is right and you just need that romantic spot on cam-pus, look no further, and pat yourself on the back for completing the #1 thing to do beforeyou graduate from SAIS.

Have you done all 15? Email matt.kaczmarek@jhu.edu to get credit and find outwhat’s next. – SAISGuy

As Professor Wedgwoodsays (and these are words

I live by): “In life, dowhat makes you happy;

but if you do, marry up.”

You’ve seen that onebeer in the refrigeratordoor in the basement of

Nitze that looks like PaulNitze himself probably left

it there. That’s right…drink it.

February 2009 THE SAIS OBSERVER page 12