Professional Writing That's UBER Fantastic

7/30/2019 Professional Writing That's UBER Fantastic

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Professional Writing

Thats UBER Fantastic10 Myths, 10 Rules

Paul F. Stregevsky

Science Writer,

Corporate Communications Division

DHS Science and Technology

Directorate

[email protected]

UnderstoodBelieved

EnjoyedRemembered


2/30

Myth 1: I was always taught

But which passage is more effective?This? Or this?DO NOT LITTER. Ifyourecaught

littering, youllbefinedand jailed.

Nothing can breakthe new multiband

radio. Nothing can

hack it. Nothing

can jam it.

The newmultiband radio

cantbe broken. Itcantbe hacked. Itcantbe jammed.

Never use the passive voice!

Never use pronouns!Do not use contractions!


3/30

Myth 2:

We are all so inclined to

think that our own

writing is clear that if our

readers struggle to

understand it, the

problem must be not our

deep writing but their

lazy reading.

Joseph M. Williams, Style

Nothing is wrong with my style.


4/30

Myth 3: By writing densely,Ill impress everyone.

We listen to cops, firemen, and

No, too plain.Accio Obfuscation!

There: Our customer-centric focus

Much better!


5/30

Myth 4: If I write vividly and clearly,I wont be taken seriously.

Deleting an I or a we

doesnt make a scientists

thinking more objective. We

know that behind thoseimpersonal sentence are

flesh-and-blood researchers

doing, thinking, and

writing.



6/30

Myth 5: My readers have to readwhat I wrote.

Shad-dup!

But its so

BORING! And

DENSE!


7/30

Myth 6: Clear writing is fine andgood, but not for my audience.

What we write always

seems clearer to us than it

does to our readers,because we can read into it

what we want readers to

get out of it.


We are too august

to be addressed

in the common tongue!


8/30

Myth 7: Im writing about technology.Its about people!act: Its not about tools.


9/30

The Turbo Encabulator


10/30

Myth 8:Its my report, to write as I see fit.

Plain Language Act of 2009: Use common, everyday words.

Useyou and other pronouns.

Use the active voice.

Dont waste my time with gobbledygook.

Write everything clearly. No exceptions!Tara says:


11/30

Myth 9: My chief goal is to inform.

What really counts, after all,

is not what we understand as

we read, but how well we

remember it the next day.


Be clear.

Be compelling.Be credible.

BecauseYour chief goal is to persuade!


12/30

Myth 10: My readers care onlyabout facts.

Clear and graceful

writers are so few,

that when we find

them, we are

desperately grateful

for them. They do

not go unrewarded.

Joseph M. Williams,Style

Spare me your pronouns,

analogies, and metaphors, for

I am a DHS stakeholder, with

no use for the human touch.


13/30

Your technical writing can be

UBER Fantastic!UnderstoodBelievedEnjoyedRemembered

Marc antony eulogizes

Julius caesar


14/30

UBER Rule 1: Keep it human.

Instead of this: Write this:The cause of our schools failure atteaching basic skills is not understandingthe influence of cultural background on

learning.

Teachersfail to teach basic skillsbecause theydont get howcultural background affects how

kids learn.

Personnelpersonnel who needpersonnelarethe luckiest personnel

Peoplepeoplewho needpeopleare the luckiest people

We, the personnel of the United States We, the peoplewillassistthelaw enforcement community willhelppolice officers (or cops;

our men and women in blue)government ofthe stakeholders, bythestakeholders, forthe stakeholders government ofthe people,bythepeople, forthe people


15/30

UBER Rule 2: Paint a mental picture.


16/30

UBER Rule 3: Dont confuse.Write not so that you can be understood,but so that you cannot be

misunderstood. Francis BaconWhatever can be written can usually bewritten more clearly, with just a bit more

effort. Joseph M. Williams, Style

Instead of this: Write this:The camera records imagery. The camera captures a continuous

movie or 1 photo every 15 seconds.

ROW-B will enable PTT calls on broadbandmobile devicesto connect to Project 25 LMRsystems, allowing LMR users and broad-

band users to be on the same group call.

At the push of a button, a citizen

can use her Blackberry, iPhone, or

Droid to talk with responders who

use radios.


17/30

Instead of this: Write this:Dear National Management

Association: This member no longerwishes to maintain his membership.

Dear NMA,

I quit.

Decisions in regard to administration ofmedication despite inability of anirrational patient appearing in a Trauma

Center to provide legal consent restwith the attending physician.

When a patient comes to a traumacenter and behaves so irrationally thathecant legally consent to treatment,only the attendingphysiciancandecide whether to medicate him.

An understanding of the causal factorsinvolved in excessive drinking bystudents couldleadto more effectivetreatment.

Ifweunderstood why some studentsdrink too much, wecouldtreat themmore effectively.

UBERRule 4:

Make the doer your subject;make action your verb.


18/30

UBERRule 5:

If your writing bores you,it will bore your readers.


19/30

UBER Rule 6:Favor the singular.

Instead of this: Write this:UsingLED Incapacitators, lawenforcement officers can takedown rioters without injuring them.

Usingthe LED Incapacitator, apolice officer can take down arioter without injuring him.

TechSolutions: Where firstresponders with ideas can beheard.

TechSolutions: Where a firstresponder with an idea can beheard.


20/30

Instead of this: Write this:We are committed to engaging ourstakeholders to enhance the Nationssecurity.

To protect Americans better, were

listening to firefighters, EMTs, cops,bomb squadders, and hazmat crews.

S&T leadership has instructedmanagement to Our Under Secretary, Dr. Tara OToole,has enjoined each divisionmanagerOur customer-focused portfolio haseffectivelyfacilitateda plan to leverageresponders resources, fusingdisparatesystemsat the National, state, regional,local, and Tribal levels.

Were finding affordable ways to help

you work, and talk, with your fellow

heroes, from fellow agencies, districts,

and states.

It is a collaborative effortbetween DHSand the standards community.

Weve teamed up with people who write,use, and rely on standards

UBERRule 7:

Lose the PR/Management-speak.


21/30

Use more qualifiers like this:As we shall see,

Ironically,

For the most part,

However,

To put these numbers in perspective,

In other words,

By comparison,

UBERRule 8:

Use metadiscourseto provide guideposts.


22/30

UBER Rule 9: Use pictures liberally.

Nuff said.


23/30

UBER Rule 10: Heed the Golden Rule of Style.

Write to others as you would have others write to you.

If we dont want others to impose carelessly complex writing

on us, then we ought not to impose it on others.

We write well when we would

willingly experience what our readersdo when they read what weve

written. That puts the burden on us to

imagine our readers and their

feelings.



24/30

Did you

Understand this?Believe it?Enjoy it? Will youRemember it?

Write as though your jobdepends on it


25/30

25

Because it does.

S&T has to sell itself to Congress as agood investment, and not a place where

ideas may be generated, only to be

ignored by front line operators.S&Tneeds more effective outreach about

what S&T does, and how the multi-billiondollar investment in the enterprise isvaluable in producing results.

--Chairman Robert Aderholt,

House Appropriations Committeeon Homeland Security,

DHS S&T FY 2012 Budget


26/30

To write UBER, think UBER.

Learn then to think ere you begin to write,If you would dot with profit and delight.

When in the mind the thoughts digested lie,

Thexpression then will readily comply.

For all obscurity lies in the mind,

And we are seldom at a loss to find

Words that may please both Intellect and Ear,

When to ourselves, weve framed our notions clear.--Nicolas Boileau,Art of Poetry, 1674


27/30

Recommended Reading: Style


28/30

Would You Bet Your Childs

Life On Your Words? Glad you read this / UBER?


29/30

I release you from the anti-UBER spell


30/30

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Professional Writing That's UBER Fantastic