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A magazine to inspire and encourage women!
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Trusting God When
It Feels Like He
Isn’t Listening
INTRODUCING
RUN
WITH
ENDURANCE
WWHENHEN GGODOD CCALLSALLS
YYOUOU OOUTUT OFOF THETHE
“M“MINISTRYINISTRY””
What’s Worse,
Turning 40 or
When
Someone
Burns Your
House Down?
Happy
New Year!
2
Connecting,
Inspiring &
Encouraging Women! Praise and Coffee Nights
Women meeting for coffee. Sharing life, laughter and the love of Jesus.
Coffee and church building not required.
3
4
Praise and Coffee
the Magazine A quarterly online publication.
Founder and Editor
Sue Cramer
Co-Editor
Denise Dykstra Submission Guidelines:
1. Anyone is welcome to submit arti-
cles or testimonies.
2. Submissions by women who have
attended or hosted a Praise and Cof-
fee event will be considered first
3. Testimonies can be personal or
connected to your experience at a
Praise and Coffee event.
4. Articles that will be considered are
to be encouraging and inspiring.
5. Humorous articles and funny sto-
ries are encouraged!
6. Length of submission should be
400-750 words.
7. Submissions will be read and con-
sidered among the Editor and co-
Editor.
8. We do not pay for articles, they are
on a volunteer basis.
9. Submissions need to include:
Name
Website (if applies)
Short (100 words or less) bio
10. Email submissions to our
Co-Editor:
For advertising info, contact Sue at:
Praise and Coffee Talk
10| What are Praise and Coffee Nights
12| The Heart of Praise and Coffee Nights
68| Praise and Coffee South Carolina Style
70| We Love Hearing From You
Features
40| When God Calls You Out of the Ministry and Into the World
58| Making Connections
62| What’s Worse, Turning 40 or Your House Burning Down?
Marriage & Family
48| Trusting God When It Feels Like He Isn’t Listening
Beautiful You
22| Run with Endurance
32| God Improvements vs. Self Improvements
In Every Issue
6 | From the Editors
10| What Are Praise and Coffee Nights?
52| For Caffeinated Moms Like You
72| Lessons From Lauren
Winter 2011
5
Volume 1~Issue 2
6
Sue Cramer Magazine Editor and Founder of Praise and Coffee
ello girlfriends!
As we step into 2011, I have such a full heart! I am crazy-thrilled about the
amazing women God has put into my life and you are one of them.
I read this quote and it sums up how I feel about my current season and all that I want to
say to you today...
“The thing that is really hard, and really amazing,
is giving up on being perfect
and beginning the work of becoming yourself.”
Anna Quindlen
My heart swells at the thought of us putting down the masks, picking up the mirrors and
saying– YOU, YOU are valuable and worth fighting for!
Stop trying to be someone you are not.
No one else can “do you” better!
Let‟s make 2011 the year we begin the work of becoming ME (or YOU, or US...oh, you
know what I mean)!
7
Denise Dykstra Magazine Co-Editor
appy New Year Greetings!
Here in Michigan, it‟s the dead of winter. Cold. Frozen.
Dark.
But it‟s also a great time to get out and enjoy the company of others. At like, say, a
coffee house, so you are out of your house that has all those walls closing in on you
and warm yummy sweet coffee drinks await you as well as…
…friends.
Who are right there with you, no different than you, all there for the same reason.
Just being together and encouraging each other in life‟s journey, looking to our Savior
for answers in our day to day life.
That‟s what Praise and Coffee is all about. And just in case you can‟t get out, this e-
zine helps bring that moment TO you. I am not sure how you found us, I just know it
wasn‟t any accident that you did. As you read our second edition, I hope you are en-
couraged and you laugh and feel hugged.
Know you are a blessing and loved.
Sue and I drank more coffee than we can recall putting this together, so how about
you brew a mug and settle in?
Thanks for visiting with us!
8
Praise and Coffee Nights is joined with Inspired Hearts Media!
Partnering with these incredible women’s ministries ….check them out!
Online conferences and training for women ministries online
www.awomaninspiredconference.org
Daily encouragement and online devotions
www.internetcafedevotions.com
A site dedicated to bridging the gap
between the child and the parent, a relationship designed by God
www.heartofthematteronline.com
9
Praise and Coffee Nights is joined with Inspired Hearts Media!
Partnering with these incredible women’s ministries ….check them out!
The Homeschool Lounge is the premier online community for the homeschooling
mother searching for fellowship, encouragement and support
www.thehomeschoollounge.com
Monthly Online & Magazine
Encouraging women to live lives that glorify Christ
www.exemplifyonline.com
Meeting God together on the other side of the screen
www.girlfriendsirl.com
10
Q What ar e
P ra ise and C offee
Ni ghts ?
Click here for more info
11
A You could call Praise and Coffee the
“accidental ministry” because it started out
as a blog with no intention of being anything more.
Sue Cramer decided to gather a few girlfriends in Michi-
gan for coffee one evening and she (teasingly) called it
a “Praise and Coffee Night”.
The next day she blogged about it and suddenly women
all over the country wanted to start Praise and Coffee
Nights in their community.
The vision of this ministry is to connect women with the
God who passionately loves them and link them up with
other women on similar journeys.
Many amazing women with the same heart and desire
are now part of this growing team. Praise and Coffee
Nights are meeting in several different states and even
other countries.
The ministry of Praise and Coffee includes the website,
Praise and Coffee Nights, videos and the Magazine.
12 Melissa Mashburn
The
Heart of
Praise and Coffee Nights By Co-Founder of Praise and Coffee Nights
Melissa Mashburn
13
The
Heart of
Praise and Coffee Nights
It was a cold and windy night in Michigan. I had traveled up to Plainwell, Michigan to speak to a group of incredible women at their Praise & Coffee Night with my dear friend and ministry founder, Sue Cramer. It was a
night full of laughter, amazing worship, and true connections.
14
The stories we shared; our journey and how our paths crossed all led us into a great
discussion about how God is using this ministry to connect the hearts of women all over the world. What a sweet and beautiful memory that night is to me now, but what I wasn’t
prepared for was that the next evening I would experience the true heart of
Praise & Coffee Nights.
15
The night was simple, but the anticipation and sheer excitement
was building as I found out that Sue had invited six friends over to her
house that I have known from the in-ternet for years. In that moment, I
became a little girl filled with giggles and silliness. The smile on my face
was from ear to ear and as each friend arrived, I would burst into
squeals of delight.
16
J umping up and down, we hugged as if we couldn’t imagine letting go. These
friends have become like family to me. Although we had never met face to face before their stories shared so transparently on their blogs that I knew them and they knew me. Each woman came bearing her signature dish of goodies and soon the kitchen table was full of all kinds of yummies. We looked as if we were preparing to be snowed in for the night, but if we were, we would be ready. The coffee was poured and the next thing I knew we were all sitting around the kitchen table. I remember thinking that it was funny that we were not on the couches as one might expect, but simply sitting at the kitchen table.
17
It was there at the kitchen table that we; ate, shared prayer requests, laughed, cried and mar-veled at how great our God is. It was there at that kitchen table where real community happened. It was there at that kitchen table that I saw the heart of Praise and Coffee Nights. Our getting together that night was not to host a Praise & Coffee Night. It was just simply to get this group of women together for such a time as this, but what God did in our midst was bigger than any of us had expected. What God did that night was to knit our hearts together forever. It strikes me that God would use two Praise & Coffee Nights, back to back to really show how rich these nights can be. The impact each of these nights made on me will have a lasting impact, but I want you, sweet sister, to know this…both were Praise & Coffee Nights. We have shared about how that Praise & Coffee Nights happen in various sizes; Tall, Grande and Venti, but it was not until that night that I really grasped that in my heart. Praise & Coffee Nights are about women getting together to share the highs and lows of their life in a safe place with women who truly care about them.
That’s it! The heart of Praise & Coffee Nights is community!
Isn’t that what most of us long for? We want to have friends that will love us through the bad stuff and cheer us on in the good stuff. We long to know that someone cares enough to be real with us.
Speaking the truth in love, peeling back the layers of protection, letting your hair down, laughing, crying, and sharing a piece of your heart with oth-er women that are sojourners on this journey of life with you.
It saw community happen in the coffee mill with a group of seventy women and I saw community happen at the kitchen table with seven women. “For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.” Matthew 18:20 NIV That is the true heart of Praise & Coffee Nights. Father God, thank you that you continue to bring women together that have a heart for community through Praise & Coffee Nights. Thank you for what you are doing right before our eyes…you are amaz-ing and we are humbled to see community happen for your glory! Help us to be women who seek to serve you first in Jesus name, Amen. What about you…
Have you started a Praise & Coffee Night in your area?
If yes, fantastic…what can we do to help you more?
If no, then what are you waiting for? If you have attended a Praise & Coffee Night,
tell us what was your favorite part of the night?
We’d love to share it in a future issue!
Melissa Mashburn Melissa Mashburn has partnered with Sue Cramer and serves as the CoCo--Founder Founder of the ministry of Praise and Coffee NightsPraise and Coffee Nights
Visit her website: Visit her website: Melissa Mashburn in Mel’s World www.MelissaMashburn.blogspot.com
18
Start a
Praise and Coffee Night
in your community!!
Learn more here!
Praise and Coffee Nights
19
For where 2 or 3 gather together because they are mine,
I am there among them. Matthew 18:20
Prescott, AZ
Reno, NV
Henderson, NV
Summerville, SC
Ft. Lauderdale, FL
Lititz, PA Clio, MI Plainwell, MI (the original!)
20
If thorn removal were sufficient, God would always grant it.
Only grace is sufficient. 2 Corinthians 12:9 “My grace is sufficient for you...”
21
If thorn removal were sufficient, God would always grant it.
Only grace is sufficient. 2 Corinthians 12:9 “My grace is sufficient for you...”
22
Casie Dussia is a small business owner and a personal trainer that ministers to
women‟s soul, mind and body and is the founder of RWE~Run with Endurance.
She lives in Southwest Michigan and enjoys life with her husband John and son.
Casie is a team partner to the Praise and Coffee Night ministry in Plainwell, MI.
Email: [email protected]
Run With
23
“Let us run with endurance the race God has set before us.”
Hebrews 12:1 This piece of scripture is extremely close to my heart. About 5 years ago, I began running as a form of exercise. I started out running about 2 miles at a time 3 times a week, then 3 miles at a time, then 4 miles at a time up to 5 times a week. I felt my body growing leaner, stronger. Every time I pushed past those uncomfortable feelings of sore muscles, burning chest, and side stitches, my endurance grew!
Looking back at that time, I now realize that my relation-ship with God was working in the same way. Every time I turned to God for strength, resisted the enemy, or stood firm in God’s word, my spiritual endurance grew! There were certainly times that I experienced uncomfortable feelings, just like when I’m running, and still do at times.
But, patiently and faithfully relying on God continued to grow my endurance, and continues to keep me focused on the finish line!
God showed me through this journey how important it is for us to maintain all as-pects of our health - physically, mentally, and spiritually - in order to achieve the beautiful plan He has for us.
I now use my endurance journey to help others. I recently began my Run with En-durance ministry to help women move forward boldly in their lives, with confident endurance, knowing God created each and every one of us thoughtfully and pur-posefully!
I am thankful that God continues to grow my endurance daily, physically and spiritually. I now run marathons, and each race and every training run in between, I run for God. It’s my little way of showing Him that I am focused and will never give up, I am ready to run this race with endur-ance!
See the following pages to run this race yourself or grab some girlfriends and run it together!
Run With
24
C asie has a passion to help women get healthy and strong. She‟s been using
her knowledge of health and exercise to help women for years and recently
put these gifts into practice by starting a weekly group called (RWE) "Run
with Endurance."
She invited a group of gals (myself included) to meet at a local coffee shop (the
same one we host our Praise and Coffee Nights at) and she shares keys to health
and wholeness from God's Word. After a time of inspiration we all set out with a
girlfriend or two (someone matched to our fitness level) and walk or run on routes
that Casie has planned out for us. If we have time, we stick around afterwards for
coffee and snacks.
It has been life changing for me! The accountability and encouragement of this
group is just what I needed. At 43 years old, I had never run a day in my life...my
mantra was: "the only reason you run is if you are being chased."
It has been life changing for me!
Written by: Sue Cramer
Praise and Coffee partners with RWE
For the race of your life!
25
NO more excuses!
I'm too tired.
I don't feel good.
My back hurts.
I did that.
Over and over again until I was so out of
shape I would get tired walking up the
stairs to my bedroom.
I wanted health but didn't want to make
any sacrifices to get it.
That doesn't work.
I was making decisions every day to let
my health go downhill.
It was time to make decisions...one day at
a time...that would increase my stamina,
endurance and overall health.
And dropping a few of these pounds
would help more than my self-image...it's
expensive to have to keep buying bigger
clothes!
I know that January practically throws
up on us with “health and fitness” but
this is not a "New Year's" decision!!
I started this in October, and you can start
it any day of the week, month or year!
There is no magic bullet to starting on the
1st day of the year, the magic comes when
you START and then continue-
one day at a time.
Can I tell ya...it has also taught me so
much about pressing through the pain-in
ALL things. God is strengthening my walk
with Him on this journey too!
Because I love you, Sue
But, this October I started to walk/run. I was
only able to run about 2 minutes at a
time...a very awkward and painful 2 minutes
at that!
Slowly and progressively I increased my
running time, working on my treadmill at
home 2-3 times a week and then once on
Friday's with my RWE girls. I am now able to
run between 2-3 miles consistently. This is
an enormous accomplishment for me! I
never dreamed I could do this!
I 'm sharing this to encourage any of you
that feel the nudging to start moving.
Here are a couple suggestions:
1. Find a girlfriend that also wants to start
moving and set up a day to get together.
2. Go to www.5K101.com and check out
their podcast for a Couch to 5K workout
plan...this was a huge help to me and I used
it at home for 8 weeks.
3. Start a RWE with a few friends!!! Use the 9 week layout on the next two pag-
es of this magazine.
Casie has a vision to see RWE grow to other
communities and plans to have clothing
and product line along with hosting races to
help raise funds for local charities.
Praise and Coffee partners with RWE
For the race of your life!
26
No Fail Steps to a Healthier YOU!
E NVIRONMENT Proverbs 27:17 “As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.” NLT
Are the friends you are surrounding yourself with supportive of your health goals? Is your family supportive?
This week‟s prayer: Heavenly Father, not only do I need you, but I need earthly support! I ask that you help me make wise choice when it comes to my surroundings. I need friends that respect and ac-
cept my health goals. I need my family to not only be supportive of me, but also be conscientious of their own health! Iron sharpens iron - I want to sharpen and I‟m ready to be sharpened! Amen!
N UTRITION 1 Corinthians 6:19 “Don‟t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself.” NLT
What are you feeding your temple? What does the bible say about nutrition? Are your food choices nourishing your body, or are you mindlessly eating empty calories? Are you opening the door for
Satan to sow illness and disease into your body by eating foods filled with preservatives, toxins, and chemicals??
This week‟s prayer: Heavenly Father, I need you to help me make right eating choices in a world gone wrong. I know your plan for my body is not to be full of preservatives, toxins, and chemicals, but rather
the nutrients contained in the plants you created for Adam and Eve - amino acids, vitamins, minerals, antioxidants, and enzymes. Your word is very clear on what I should be eating. Help me to let your word
guide my nutritional choices. I want to be fully nourished so that I can accomplish the good plans you have me! Amen!
D ETERMINATION Isaiah 40:31 “But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.” NLT
Are you setting tangible goals? Are you focused on achieving them? Are you completely trusting God and relying on His strength to reach them? Are you diligent in waiting on God, patient in know-
ing that He is walking with you on this journey?
This week‟s prayer: Heavenly Father, thank you for your faithfulness! I know you are with me and desire good health for me! I trust You and I will not grow weary during this journey! When I am faced with
temptations, please show me how to resist. The opposite of determination is weakness. Your weakness is stronger than the greatest of human strength; how can I possibly fail with You beside me?! Amen!
U NITY Ephesians 4:3 “Make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace.” NLT
Are you allowing stress over relationships to affect your health, without even realizing it?? Are you seeking peace with others, or are you hoarding resentment, anger, sadness? Are you allowing the en-
emy to plant false thoughts in your head about or towards others?
This week‟s prayer: Heavenly Father, help me build healthy, peaceful relationships. Help me see people through your eyes, with a forgiving heart, realizing that everyone has weaknesses and strongholds, just
as I do, that they are working through. Continue to remind me that by keeping my mind and body healthy, I will be better equipped to deal with confrontations and disagreements with loved ones. During
times of dispute, please remind me to call on You instead of putting all of the stress on my own shoulders. Please continue to remind me that by staying united in the Spirit, we slam the door shut on the ene-
my‟s attempts to attack our relationships! Amen!
R ESPONSIBILITY Galatians 6:4 “For we are each responsible for our own conduct.” NLT
Are you taking responsibility for your own healthy/unhealthy actions? Are you justifying your actions?? Do have an “entitlement” mentality (“I worked out hard today - I deserve a Grande Latte!”) Are
you respecting God‟s body??
This week‟s prayer: Heavenly Father, I don‟t want to disrespect you or the body you have given me any longer! I am responsible for my own health. Please help me hold myself accountable. The decision to
make healthy choices is mine, and with Your help, I can make the right choices! Thank you for your mighty strength and direction! Amen!
27
RWE No Fail Steps to a Healthier YOU!
E NVIRONMENT Proverbs 27:17 “As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.” NLT
Are the friends you are surrounding yourself with supportive of your health goals? Is your family supportive?
This week‟s prayer: Heavenly Father, not only do I need you, but I need earthly support! I ask that you help me make wise choice when it comes to my surroundings. I need friends that respect and ac-
cept my health goals. I need my family to not only be supportive of me, but also be conscientious of their own health! Iron sharpens iron - I want to sharpen and I‟m ready to be sharpened! Amen!
N UTRITION 1 Corinthians 6:19 “Don‟t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself.” NLT
What are you feeding your temple? What does the bible say about nutrition? Are your food choices nourishing your body, or are you mindlessly eating empty calories? Are you opening the door for
Satan to sow illness and disease into your body by eating foods filled with preservatives, toxins, and chemicals??
This week‟s prayer: Heavenly Father, I need you to help me make right eating choices in a world gone wrong. I know your plan for my body is not to be full of preservatives, toxins, and chemicals, but rather
the nutrients contained in the plants you created for Adam and Eve - amino acids, vitamins, minerals, antioxidants, and enzymes. Your word is very clear on what I should be eating. Help me to let your word
guide my nutritional choices. I want to be fully nourished so that I can accomplish the good plans you have me! Amen!
D ETERMINATION Isaiah 40:31 “But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.” NLT
Are you setting tangible goals? Are you focused on achieving them? Are you completely trusting God and relying on His strength to reach them? Are you diligent in waiting on God, patient in know-
ing that He is walking with you on this journey?
This week‟s prayer: Heavenly Father, thank you for your faithfulness! I know you are with me and desire good health for me! I trust You and I will not grow weary during this journey! When I am faced with
temptations, please show me how to resist. The opposite of determination is weakness. Your weakness is stronger than the greatest of human strength; how can I possibly fail with You beside me?! Amen!
U NITY Ephesians 4:3 “Make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace.” NLT
Are you allowing stress over relationships to affect your health, without even realizing it?? Are you seeking peace with others, or are you hoarding resentment, anger, sadness? Are you allowing the en-
emy to plant false thoughts in your head about or towards others?
This week‟s prayer: Heavenly Father, help me build healthy, peaceful relationships. Help me see people through your eyes, with a forgiving heart, realizing that everyone has weaknesses and strongholds, just
as I do, that they are working through. Continue to remind me that by keeping my mind and body healthy, I will be better equipped to deal with confrontations and disagreements with loved ones. During
times of dispute, please remind me to call on You instead of putting all of the stress on my own shoulders. Please continue to remind me that by staying united in the Spirit, we slam the door shut on the ene-
my‟s attempts to attack our relationships! Amen!
R ESPONSIBILITY Galatians 6:4 “For we are each responsible for our own conduct.” NLT
Are you taking responsibility for your own healthy/unhealthy actions? Are you justifying your actions?? Do have an “entitlement” mentality (“I worked out hard today - I deserve a Grande Latte!”) Are
you respecting God‟s body??
This week‟s prayer: Heavenly Father, I don‟t want to disrespect you or the body you have given me any longer! I am responsible for my own health. Please help me hold myself accountable. The decision to
make healthy choices is mine, and with Your help, I can make the right choices! Thank you for your mighty strength and direction! Amen!
This 9 week study was developed by Casie Dussia for
our RWE ~Run with Endurance group, feel free to use
it to start an RWE group in your community!
Questions? Email: [email protected]
28
A TTITUDE Ephesians 4:23 “Let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes.” NLT
Are you thinking about what you‟re thinking about? Do your thoughts line up with God‟s word? Are you waking up in the morning and thanking God for another day closer to the good plan He
has for your life? Do you look forward to taking care of your body, or do you look at it as work? Do you focus on the negative and setbacks, or do you celebrate the positive and small steps in the
right direction??
This week‟s prayer: Heavenly Father, please renew my thoughts and attitude to line up with your plan for my life. My thoughts regarding my circumstances dictate how I handle them; I want an unwaver-
ing faith so that regardless of my circumstances, I trust You to guide me through. Please help me maintain positive mental health and a good attitude towards my body, even when it‟s not as healthy as it
should be! Positive thoughts lead to positive actions! Please let me live by the Spirit in love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Please help me have the
right attitude so that I can see these things within myself and utilize them! Amen!
N OURISHMENT Matthew 4:4 “Scriptures say, „People do not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God.‟ “ NLT
Are you nourishing your spirit with the word of God? Are you seeking God 1st and your goals 2
nd? Do you realize that your spiritual nourishment is even more important than your physical nour-
ishment??
This week‟s prayer: Heavenly Father, I need spiritual nourishment before I can move forward in achieving my physical health goals. Please remind me that I need to feed the seed you have planted in my
heart daily, and that can only be done with Your word! Also help me understand that a seed takes time to produce and I need to be diligent in seeking You. I am hungry for your word! Thank you for the
nourishment you provide!! Amen!
C ONFIDENCE Philippians 4:13 “For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.” NLT
Do you realize that God created you the way you are intentionally and you have a purpose bigger than you can even imagine? Are you focusing on your weaknesses, or embracing your uniqueness?
Are you speaking positive and kind words to yourself? Do you faithfully trust God, or are you fearfully questioning your choices. Are you trying to be someone you‟re not??
This week‟s prayer: Heavenly Father, thank you for my gifts, talents and unique personality! Thank you for your continued strength, so that I may continue to move forward boldly, with confidence! Thank
you for continually molding me and shaping me through my weaknesses and strongholds, which draws me closer to You. Help me understand that loving and accepting myself and my body affirms that
Your creation of me is good and right. Please continue to remind me that there could never be a more beautiful me!! Thank you for seeing me as a priceless treasure!! Amen!
E NDURANCE Hebrews 12:1 “Let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us.” NLT
Are you willing to endure what it takes to reach the finish line? Are your eyes fixed on the goals that God has for your life, or are you allowing distractions, becoming entangled in worldly situations
that set you back? Are you allowing God to grow your endurance by having consistent and confident faith in Him??
This week‟s prayer: Heavenly Father, please help me keep my focus on the race before me, stripping any hindrances that might be in my path. Allow my endurance to grow from circumstance to circum-
stance, faith to faith! This can only happen with complete confidence in you; I want consistent confidence, not occasional confidence! Continue to remind me that I must maintain my health in order to run
the race before me. I am ready to endure what it takes to reach the finish line!! Amen!
RWE
29
A TTITUDE Ephesians 4:23 “Let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes.” NLT
Are you thinking about what you‟re thinking about? Do your thoughts line up with God‟s word? Are you waking up in the morning and thanking God for another day closer to the good plan He
has for your life? Do you look forward to taking care of your body, or do you look at it as work? Do you focus on the negative and setbacks, or do you celebrate the positive and small steps in the
right direction??
This week‟s prayer: Heavenly Father, please renew my thoughts and attitude to line up with your plan for my life. My thoughts regarding my circumstances dictate how I handle them; I want an unwaver-
ing faith so that regardless of my circumstances, I trust You to guide me through. Please help me maintain positive mental health and a good attitude towards my body, even when it‟s not as healthy as it
should be! Positive thoughts lead to positive actions! Please let me live by the Spirit in love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Please help me have the
right attitude so that I can see these things within myself and utilize them! Amen!
N OURISHMENT Matthew 4:4 “Scriptures say, „People do not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God.‟ “ NLT
Are you nourishing your spirit with the word of God? Are you seeking God 1st and your goals 2
nd? Do you realize that your spiritual nourishment is even more important than your physical nour-
ishment??
This week‟s prayer: Heavenly Father, I need spiritual nourishment before I can move forward in achieving my physical health goals. Please remind me that I need to feed the seed you have planted in my
heart daily, and that can only be done with Your word! Also help me understand that a seed takes time to produce and I need to be diligent in seeking You. I am hungry for your word! Thank you for the
nourishment you provide!! Amen!
C ONFIDENCE Philippians 4:13 “For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.” NLT
Do you realize that God created you the way you are intentionally and you have a purpose bigger than you can even imagine? Are you focusing on your weaknesses, or embracing your uniqueness?
Are you speaking positive and kind words to yourself? Do you faithfully trust God, or are you fearfully questioning your choices. Are you trying to be someone you‟re not??
This week‟s prayer: Heavenly Father, thank you for my gifts, talents and unique personality! Thank you for your continued strength, so that I may continue to move forward boldly, with confidence! Thank
you for continually molding me and shaping me through my weaknesses and strongholds, which draws me closer to You. Help me understand that loving and accepting myself and my body affirms that
Your creation of me is good and right. Please continue to remind me that there could never be a more beautiful me!! Thank you for seeing me as a priceless treasure!! Amen!
E NDURANCE Hebrews 12:1 “Let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us.” NLT
Are you willing to endure what it takes to reach the finish line? Are your eyes fixed on the goals that God has for your life, or are you allowing distractions, becoming entangled in worldly situations
that set you back? Are you allowing God to grow your endurance by having consistent and confident faith in Him??
This week‟s prayer: Heavenly Father, please help me keep my focus on the race before me, stripping any hindrances that might be in my path. Allow my endurance to grow from circumstance to circum-
stance, faith to faith! This can only happen with complete confidence in you; I want consistent confidence, not occasional confidence! Continue to remind me that I must maintain my health in order to run
the race before me. I am ready to endure what it takes to reach the finish line!! Amen!
This 9 week study was developed by Casie Dussia for our RWE ~Run with Endurance group, feel free to
use it to start an RWE group in your community!
For more info email: [email protected]
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Lysa has a fun and inspiring blog,
you have to check it out!
www.lysaterkeurst.com
Lysa TerKeurst
Click on products to purchase.
31
Candace Cameron Bure first became
known to millions as a co-star on the hit
ABC television series Full House. Today,
like her brother Kirk Cameron (Growing
Pains, Fireproof), she is the rare Holly-
wood actor who is outspoken about her
Christian faith and how it helps overcome
certain obstacles, like her struggle with
food addiction.
Bure’s recent weight loss was featured in
US Weekly and People magazines as well
as national talk shows including The View
and NBC’s Today. In Reshaping It All, she
continues the story, inspiring women to
embrace a healthier lifestyle by moving
faith to the forefront, making wise choices,
and finding their worth in the eyes of God.
Candace shares a candid account of her
struggle with food, and ultimately her
healthy outlook on weight despite the
toothpick-thin expectations of Hollywood.
More than a testimony, here is a motiva-
tional tool that will put readers on the right
track and keep them there. In addition to
practical advice, Candace offers a biblical
perspective on appetite and self control
that provides encouragement to women,
guiding them toward freedom.
Reshaping It All: Motivation for Physical
and Spiritual Fitness is available at:
www.amazon.com and
www.barnesandnoble.com
Our good friend Darlene Schacht is the co-writer of this amazing book. Darlene is a forty-
something-year-old Christian mother of four whose children range in ages from eight
to eighteen. She and her husband Michael, live in Manitoba, Canada, where they run a
company that empowers writers to self-publish.
Darlene also writes a great blog called “Time Warp Wife-
Empowering Wives to Joyfully Serve”
www.time-warp-wife.blogspot.com
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God Improvements vs Self Improvements
33
God Improvements vs Self Improvements
It’s 2011 and you are probably feeling the pressure to write some “New Year‟s Resolutions.” You may find yourself making a mental list of all of the things that you would like to change
about yourself and then come up with a number of goals to make yourself better.
But be careful, because I think that self im-provement can get you off track
if you don‟t have the right mind set.
What perspective are you using to drive your goals, a worldly or Godly one, and
what really needs to change?
There are 5 areas that I believe will be worthwhile as long as you look at them
“God-Style.”
Tera Secord is a middle school health teach-
er that enjoys teaching people of all ages
how to work on being their personal best in
all dimensions of life.
She lives in Southwest Michigan and enjoys
life with her husband Tim and two children,
Madison and Gabriel. Tera is a team partner
to the Praise and Coffee Nights ministry in
Plainwell, MI.
Email: [email protected]
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Before you even think about what type of goals that you should strive for in 2011, it is so important to take time before the Lord and pray about what He wants you to work on.
Instead of just watching all of the infomer-cials about the latest fitness gadgets and juicers, really take some time to get alone with God and pray about what He wants you to focus on this New Year. You may even want to set aside a whole “self” day, and fast and pray about what God is speaking to you about.
I know, some of you are saying, “Yeah
right, I can’t get a whole day to myself.”
If that is the case, even setting aside a window of time would be a great way to
approach talking with the Lord.
After listening to God, see what verse He is laying on your heart to make your “verse for the year.” It is so empowering to have a verse that God has laid on your heart, and then focus on really applying it to your life every day that year. I have a good friend that even recommends writing the verse on your mirror in a dry-erase marker so that you see it very day right away. Who doesn‟t take a least a few minutes every day to be in front of the mirror? Make it your focus.
35
Next, think about what physical area really needs improvement in your temple. I like to remember that my body is God‟s, and it is merely on loan to me. I think about how when I borrow an item from someone, I really try to give it back to them in good shape. Shouldn‟t I do the same in this context?
There are so many dimensions of physical fitness; flexibility (our range of motion), muscular strength (how much power our muscles can exert), cardio-vascular (our capacity to keep our heart, lungs and blood vessels working with oxygen) and our body fat percentage (our percentage of lean to fat ratio).
I am not going to go into great detail about what each of these areas should be, but is one of them especially lacking? More importantly, is your physi-cal health getting in the way of you doing God‟s work? It is great to work on improving or maintain-ing all of these areas, but chose one to really focus on improving.
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How are you doing mentally? Do you find that you have brain fog a lot and a hard time concentrating? Are you one of those people who says, “I can‟t remember anything?” The great news is there are ways to improve your mental clarity and decrease that fogginess! One way is doing daily activities in different ways. For instance, driving a different way to work than normal, or eating with your non-dominant hand. It is so important for your brain to make new pathways and changing things up is a great way to do that. Another really helpful way is to eat less sugar and starchy carbohydrates. Choosing whole foods and whole grains versus processed foods is a great way to combat brain slumps, not to mention your body fat can decrease if you stay away from processed food.
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How are you doing mentally? Do you find that you have brain fog a lot and a hard time concentrating? Are you one of those people who says, “I can‟t remember anything?” The great news is there are ways to improve your mental clarity and decrease that fogginess! One way is doing daily activities in different ways. For instance, driving a different way to work than normal, or eating with your non-dominant hand. It is so important for your brain to make new pathways and changing things up is a great way to do that. Another really helpful way is to eat less sugar and starchy carbohydrates. Choosing whole foods and whole grains versus processed foods is a great way to combat brain slumps, not to mention your body fat can decrease if you stay away from processed food.
(because yes, 2011 will have stress)
There are so many areas to improve, but lastly, make sure you are finding ways to de-stress each day. What do I mean by “de-stress?” It is very important to find ways daily to help your body effectively cope with the distress that you will encoun-ter. Finances, family issues, no matter what, you will have stress, of this you can count on. The good news about this is you can cope through Christ. Reading scriptures that cover the exact situation you are encountering is so helpful. Writing them on sticky notes to post them where you will see them. Other effective ways to de-stress are deep breathing, Yoga, and relaxation tech-niques. The list goes on and on, but it is a choice to do them that is often skipped. Remem-
ber, you will be better for others if you take care of you.
If you feel overwhelmed with all of the areas that I have listed, then start with step
one.
Getting time alone with God will always help you to put the rest into perspective,
and His perspective versus yours. You may even need to tell God that you don‟t
even know where to start. If you take time to listen, He help you to discern His will
for you.
Taking any step forward will help you to make positive changes, and more im-
portantly, God changes! You can do this, make 2011 a year of God improvements
versus self improvements.
38
So you fell down… don’t cry, make snow angels!
39
40
When God Calls YouWhen God Calls YouWhen God Calls You
out of out of out of “ministry” “ministry” “ministry”
and into the and into the and into the WorldWorldWorld! ! !
Written by: Sue Cramer
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B rook Taylor and her co-host Tommy Dylan took the con-troversial leap from Christian to secular radio about 3 years ago and now make up the morning team of Tommy and Brook on STAR 105.7 in Grand Rapids, MI. A decision that was much prayed over but not understood by many in her Christian audience.
Brook always knew that her job on the Christian station was not her final destination in radio. She always had the sense that she would not stay in the Christian venue. She felt that God did not prepare her, as His missionary, to stay-but to GO. To go out into the world around her and minis-ter in a whole new way.
I think Brook‟s story was so com-pelling to me because on a smaller scale, I had lived it. Like Brook, I loved ministering to the body of Christ. For me it was women‟s ministry, writing and teaching Bible studies, leading worship and serving in all capaci-ty in my local church. But also like Brook I had a hunger to get out beyond the four walls of the
church and spend more time rub-bing elbows with those who did-n‟t regularly attend traditional church services...or in Brook‟s case, those who weren‟t listening to Christian radio.
Brook loved sharing scripture,
praying on Christian radio and preaching the words of Jesus to a Christian audience but longed to reach others with the love of God, to touch the lives of those who would never turn on Chris-tian radio.
Thankfully there are those that do stumble across Christian radio and find hope on the airwaves
but she wanted to have a more direct connection to those out-side the mostly Christian com-munity.
One day Tommy and Brook got that opportunity. STAR (Clear Channel) gave them a call and said they would love to have them as their morning team.
They had prayed that God would expand their influence, open new doors, and here was their oppor-tunity!
42
Their employers at the Christian sta-tion, while saddened to lose them, saw the opportunity for them to be „salt and light‟ and gave them their blessing and agreed on a two-week notice. Unfortunately, as these things go, not everyone was happy and they‟re leaving ignited contro-versy. To sum up that part of the story, Tommy and Brook were never
able to finish-up that last 2 weeks and sadly never able to say goodbye to the audience so near and dear to their hearts.
As I interviewed Brook for this arti-cle I could sense the deep pain that decision had brought both Tommy and Brook. With a lack of infor-mation out there, people jumped to
their own conclusions and said (and wrote) some very hurtful things about them.
I could relate in so many ways to what she was feeling. When Mark and I stepped out of pastoral minis-try to pursue business ventures and let God use us differently, people couldn‟t comprehend that we would step away from the local church
ministry and some of them misspoke the truth based on their understand-ing, without ever talking directly with us about it.
Pictures from Tommy & Brook’s trip to
American Idol 2009.
With: Brooke White, Paula & Randy
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For Tommy and Brook, rumors be-gan to fly but the plain truth of the matter is, this team made their deci-
sion based on their desire to be used of God in a brand new way. And I can testify that this is what‟s hap-pening with them. Their show is number one in some of our local de-mographics and they bring joy and laughter to hearts everyday!
They have a family-friendly show that incorporates everything from
recipes to conversation about the im-portance of family time and activities. Their Face-book page is filled with comments of those touched
by their show. What a great testimony!
One of the many wonderful things they have done is pioneer a project they call TOY (think-outside-yourself) which encourages their lis-teners to reach out and help those around us in a variety of ways. This year at Christmas they raised
$245,000 for a local children‟s hospi-tal!! What a great way to touch the lives of those in their community!
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Do they miss some of the sweet peo-ple they know from the Christian ra-dio? Of course, but that‟s part of the
sacrifice of stepping into new waters with God.
Tommy and Brook love the Lord with all their heart and I see and hear them love others everyday.
I really wanted to share Brook‟s story with you because I believe it is so important for us to offer grace to those who make decisions that we don‟t understand. It does the body or Christ a great disservice to attack one another‟s decisions. We shine for Him when we support and pray for each other.
And I also think we need to be care-ful not to limit “ministry” to be within the church walls and Christian com-
munity. Sometimes we are called to step out of our comfort zone within the Christian community and touch this world with the love and grace of God! And that IS ministry in it‟s sweetest form.
Before I ever listened to them on STAR 105.7, I saw a “Tweet” by Tommy and Brook and I instantly
knew I would love them...it said “Just played Chris Tomlin‟s „How Great is Our God‟ and then Pink. Salt and Light!”
How cool is that?! I had to hear their story and I‟m so glad that I did. She encouraged me to remem-ber what ministry is all about… peo-ple. Jesus ministered in places that the
religious leaders would never go, that‟s what we love about Him! This team walked through a door that I believe God opened for them and it‟s been a wild ride ever since! From talking with kids and families every-day– you must check out Noah on their website– to spending hours in conversation with Paula Abdul and eventually flying out to meet the whole American Idol group.
Tommy & Brook with our own local celeb
Matt Giraud
I am so blessed to have Brook as my special guest at my next
Praise and Coffee Night here in Plainwell, MI to talk with me about their “adventure” and share with others the many
ways God has used them in the secular radio market.
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Can you tell the community missed
them over vacation?!
Tommy and Brook have made
this phrase popular on their
show as they encourage
listeners everyday to
‘make it the best day ever!’
I have thoroughly enjoyed getting to know Brook, I’m thankful for the op-portunity. God is definitely using her
as “salt and light” in our community.
Brook is also an active member of her church family serving as a singer on the worship team.
As I was putting this article
together I found out that their
show was just rated
#1 morning show for families
in West Michigan! Congrats!!
See their webpage:
Tommy & Brook
Click here to
find them
on Facebook.
Click
“Listen Live Now”
to hear them on
your computer
weekday mornings
from 5-10 AM from
anywhere in the
world!
46
www.mercyministries.org
48
He isn’t listening!
When it feels like
49
s I sat in bible study that week one of the questions
read, “Tell about a time when you knew it had to be God because there are no CO-INCIDENCES.”
I could not tell the first answer that came to my mind because we had not told our family yet, but I wanted to yell
“I‟m pregnant!”
This is a long but amazing story of God‟s faithfulness woven through it. With all the work of being a mom, I see daily that children are one of the biggest blessings and gifts from God. They say the coolest things, have the softest skin, make me smile all the time and yet cry in frustra-tion. Best of all they‟ve brought me closer to my heavenly Father as I‟ve needed His guidance to raise them. And the love that parents have for their chil-dren gives me a glimpse of His amazing love for us.
I have wanted more children for about 2 years but my husband did not share that same desire. Really, Shawn and I didn‟t see eye to eye on this at all.
His saying was, “Two and done.”
He loves our girls but had no desire for more children. He thought I was crazy for wanting to go back to the baby stage and give up the ability to „get up and go.‟ Our girls are 7 and 4 years old so, yes, they still need us in many way but we also have a lot of free-dom at this point.
But the longing for another child was huge for me and could be consuming some days. I didn‟t understand why I continued to have these thoughts and desires and yet Shawn felt completely different. I asked God to change this longing in my heart if it were not of Him, and I questioned if I was not being con-tent with the blessing he had already pro-vided.
I can‟t remember the date, but I remem-ber crying out to the Lord again, yet this time was different. I listened to the song “Your Hands” by JJ Heller, and wept through most of it. Out of frustration and a longing that was not going away, I laid every detail of my inmost desires at His feet. I don‟t remember an immediate change in my heart but I do remember a peace that I had not had before.
Shawn with our girls.
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Sure, some women would have just gone off their birth control and let nature take it‟s course, but I trust Shawn and know that God gives him wisdom as the leader of our house, so I never considered let-ting an “accident happen.” I decided to drop the subject and put it in God‟s hands. Still, it was difficult not being on the same page.
In June I told Shawn that if we were done having kids I would like to get off birth control and wanted him to have a vasec-tomy. I asked him to do a little research and that I would wait, but was ready to get the ball rolling on this.
A few days later we were out on our back porch, and he shocked me when he said, “why don‟t you stop the birth control and we will see what happens?” WHAT?! “You know that means I could get preg-nant right?” was my response, thinking he might have lost his mind or forgot for a minute. He followed with, “I know I keep trying to control everything and the more I give up, the more I see Gods blessing and I don‟t want to get in the way of His will.”
Shawn, the man who wanted to have a vasectomy right after our second was born-while I was still recovering from having her-now wanted to give it to God! God had changed his heart! And I knew that this change was ONLY due to the Lord and His will, not ours!
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And guess what? Four months later we are due June 24th! God is good and we are looking forward to meeting the next blessing to our family!
I have learned through this
situation that when we cry out to God and feel like the answer is no or feel that he is not listening, He is. It may just not be the right time or His will right now. I love that our heavenly Father loves us enough to not always give in when we re-ally want something.
Having a desire or passion that your hus-band does not share can be very hard and if this is you, I encourage you to not give up on prayer and continue to ask God to plant His desires in your heart, and He will.
Jaime Rogers is part of the Praise and
Coffee Team in Plainwell, MI. Jaime
has been married 9 years to her
husband Shawn and they have been
blessed with two beautiful girls.
She loves her quiet time, writing and
studying God's word. She also loves
hanging out with girlfriends!!
You can find her blogging at:
www.TheWordInWorship.com
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For Caffeinated Moms Like You!
Fear and the New Year
Denise Dykstra, co-editor of Praise and Coffee the Magazine.
Denise is heavily caffeinated and joyfully married to her truck
driving, farming husband. They reside in Michigan raising
their four boys (ages 11 to 4) on a hobby farm that keeps
them hopping busy. She updates friends on her sons‟ latest
escapades and caught snakes on her blog
“Life With Four Boys...Coffee Please!”
53
A fter the busy insanity that Christmas
and New Years brings, I finally feel a
moment to breathe as we settle into
January.
Momentarily, of course.
I‟m a countdown to spring sort of gal. I am all
about bare feet and beach days and flowers
and fresh veggies.
But I also sort of feel a bit of panic. I don‟t nor-
mally admit it, it seems quite silly, but it‟s there
just the same.
As I fill out my momAgenda for the year, flip-
ping through last years pages and glancing at
the calendar to make sure I copy all the correct
dates of birthdays and anniversaries and “last
year we did this” sort of things, I stare at all
those blank pages and wonder what will be rec-
orded upon them.
Fear and the New Year
54
What if I don’t like it?
What if I mess it up royally?
Cuz I could.
Because I have.
If I just knew what to expect…maybe then
I could plan. Just a bit. A heads up would
be so…helpful.
I was reminded of this just today. I was
picking up and going over my “to do” list
in my head. Monday, the day I have off so
I needed to get the dinners ready for the
week because making dinner on the day I
worked always proves insane. And the
calls I had to make, the calls I was expect-
ing, and all in all I was not really paying
much attention to my youngest chattering
away. But then I realized in mere days he
would be five. My youngest. Would be
five.
And in this year we were in, he would be
starting school for five full days a week.
I’m not sure I know how to cope with that.
As I moved on to laundry and he began to
set up his train set, my mind was still rac-
ing with the to do list but still thinking
how I had no idea what this year holds.
And it frightens me.
Panics me a bit.
Not that I can change it, not that I expect
anything bad, it’s just the unknown.
Abraham set up his track, it had sharp sud-
den ends here and there, a bunch of track
from one end of the room to the other,
making no sense and yet he happily
chugged his train along. “Back up! Back
up!” I heard him say in his best conductor
voice. “Okay, see you next stop!”
My husband, who happened to be home
and happens to help build roads for a job,
was finishing his coffee. I hinted to him
how much Abraham would like it if Daddy
played trains with him.
When Panic Knocks
55
Pretty soon, father and son were on the
floor tearing the track Abraham had care-
fully laid out to put together a flowing cir-
cle track, with a bridge and a tunnel even!
As they posed for the picture they knew I
would have to take, it hit me. It was God
talking to me through my family again.
Abraham had worked hard to put together
his train track. He was happy to go along
with it, content to play his day away, even
if it had abrupt stops and it stretched forev-
er so his knees would be getting a work
out over our dirty carpet. He was happy for
the time he had to play.
But he was willing to let his Daddy, who
knew how to make a working, flowing
track, tear his masterpiece apart and re-
build.
Because he trusted his Daddy to only make
it better for him.
Like I needed to trust God to tear into my
carefully laid plans and trust HIM that if I
would just believe he is the author of my
life and lean into His leading, my life will
go so much smoother.
With so much less beating myself up.
And could be down right fun.
Instead of just worrying about the future –
which, yes, you do need to prepare for – I
need to trust in my Heavenly Father and
enjoy the moment I have now. Before I
worry it away and miss the gift it is.
To have joy, that true gift of joy, even if
the moment I’m in just seems to be a dead
end road block that I need to turn around
and deal with so I can go chugging along
with track before me.
So under today’s date in my momAgenda,
it’ll read “Played trains with Abraham. It
was blast. Remember what I learned about
trusting God…”
2011 is off to a great start
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Connect with us online! Connect with us online!
Praise and Coffee Nights on Facebook
Praise and Coffee the Magazine on
57
We’re all a Twitter!
@praiseandcoffee
Connect with us online! Connect with us online!
58
Connections!Connections!Connections!
Stacey Davis
59
I „m a big fan of Praise and Coffee nights.
When I was first invited I wasn‟t really sure
what to expect, but a Praise and Coffee
night involved two of my favorite things, praise
and coffee. When I ventured out the first time I
was not disappointed. There was plenty of
praise and fantastic coffee but even more than
that there was a room full of women who loved
God like I do.
B eyond fellowship I discovered that Praise
and Coffee was also about meeting peo-
ple who might influence your life. I never
imagined that these nights out would bring me
to the place where I am now.
Connections!Connections!Connections! When God puts us right where we belong!
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Making Connections
A few years ago I picked up my first mommy
devotional. It was called:
“Just Give Me a Little Piece of Quiet:
Daily Getaways for a Mom‟s Soul “
by Lorilee Craker.
Lorilee introduced me to Alison Hodgson. Ali-
son and Lorilee are both members of the
Guild which is a writing group. Alison and Lo-
rilee were so encouraging when I told them I
was starting to write some of my own stuff.
But I shared with them that I didn‟t know
where to go with it or how to break into the
field of writing. Alison gave me information
on a Christian Writer‟s conference Breathe
that was being held later in the fall and en-
couraged me to attend. When I went to the
conference it felt like an extension of Praise
and Coffee nights; I was in the midst of won-
derful people who loved God and showed His
love to me. I learned more, was encouraged
more, and gained a confidence in my writing
that I hadn‟t had before.
So now, I have even more of a reason to love
these nights out. These nights are not only an
opportunity to have a great night out filled
with praise, and coffee, and girlfriends, and
laughs; they can also be about meeting peo-
ple who lead you to the place you were
meant to be.
The title alone spoke to me, telling me to
buy it I wanted a little piece and quiet!! It
was filled with short stories and devotion-
als that spoke to me as a mom. I felt like
Lorilee was right there in the trenches with
me and understood what I was going
through. She opened up a whole new gen-
re of books to me. I read in her bio that she
was from Grand Rapids. A funny mom-
writer in my neck of the woods. Maybe I
could do that one day, I remember think-
ing.
I never in my wildest imagination thought
that I would ever get a chance to meet
someone famous, someone whose book I
read and adored. But that is exactly what
happened. At the June 25th
Praise and Cof-
fee night Lorilee came and spoke about her
new book Through the Storm written with
Lynn Spears. She was amazing; I was in
awe. I waited patiently to have a moment
to speak to her, and again, I was amazed.
When we spoke she sounded just like she
did in her book! She took the time to speak
to me and listened attentively to my ques-
tions when I asked her about her writing.
Stacey Davis is the proud wife of National Guardsman Varren , the joyful mom
to two little girls, Caitlyn and Molly, and a loyal fan of all things coffee. When
not drinking coffee she volunteers her time as coordinator of the Sisterhood of
Motherhood, a moms group, (where we serve coffee!), various women’s minis-
tries and co-leads her daughter's Girl Scout troop. Her passion is serving the
Lord and supporting moms. During naptime she spends time either writing or
watching old episodes of Cold Case. Your can check out her jottings at
www.somotherhood.com which she co-writes with Colleen Stout.
61
Available at
Author Lorilee Craker
Watch for her latest book coming Summer 2011!
www.BreatheConference.com
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down?
What’s worse?
Turning 40 or
your house
burning
By: Alison Hodgson
63
One morning, several days after my 30th
birthday, I glanced in the mirror and was astonished to
see twin fissures between my eyebrows, so deep they threatened the equilibrium of anyone who
came within sight and that my forehead resembled a thoroughly, if unevenly, ploughed field. My
face had fallen and couldn‟t get up.
I wasn‟t sure exactly when it happened. Was it possible to age 70 years in one night? Or had I
been slowly wrinkling and shriveling, day-by-day losing my looks, and hadn‟t even noticed? How
long had my husband Paul watched this sad decline? Had the horror of it silenced him? Was he
bravely staying with me and my time-ravaged face for the sake of his vows and the children? Or
did it happen overnight and I needed to warn him that a hideous crone had replaced the fresh
girl he married? I clawed for the phone to call him at work.
But then it occurred to me that, at any given movement, I might not know where my purse is but
I never forget what I look like. I called my friend, Gayle, who is a few years older than I am.
“Did you get nutty around your 30th
birthday?” I asked.
She laughed. “Call Susie,” she
said, referring to a mutual friend
who was 31.
Turns out a lot of women get up-
set around a big birthday. Of course I knew that but, having been a natural girl and never into
excessive primping, I figured I would be immune. And I certainly minimized how upsetting turn-
ing thirty could be. I thought forty was the big deal. It always had been to the old people when I
was a child, with their repeat celebrations of turning 39 and talk of the Big 4-0. But I learned that
thirty is the line of demarcation between youth and not so youthful, when you realize that all the
things you thought would happen someday, might not.
Just understanding that some of it was in my head helped. For several months afterwards I was
scrupulous about keeping my forehead unfurrowed and was extra careful about applying sun-
screen but eventually I forgot and when I glanced in the mirror I just saw my face, without judg-
ment - unless I had a pimple or looked puffy from eating too much sugar but I‟d been doing that
practically since birth - so everything was perfectly normal until I turned 35.
“ Did you get nutty around
your 30th birthday?”
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My father had died the year, almost to the day,
before my 35th
birthday. He was 64: too
young. I decided I wanted to die “full of
years” as the Bible says, and determined to
cherish my life. As unpalatable as aging is, the
only alternative is death. I coasted into my 35th
birthday with wisdom, clarity and peace. Al-
most immediately the twin fissures reap-
peared, as did the ever more deeply plowed
field and I don‟t want to even consider a meta-
phor for what was going on at the edge of my
lips, because it was just too scary.
I took to wearing sunglasses
every.single.minute and to applying makeup
for the first time because my simple look of a
little lipstick and mascara no longer cut it. Un-
der-eye cream became my BFF and I raged
that my mother hadn‟t started applying it in-
utero.
Eventually this too passed and I relaxed on
everything but the under-eye cream; just be-
cause you are obsessive about something
doesn‟t mean it‟s imprudent.
What’s worse...
Last summer, as my 40th
birthday approached,
I wasn‟t sure what to expect. Of course I was
super duper, absolutely, positively clear that
there was a cloud of crazy floating out there
just waiting to burst, despite everyone‟s assur-
ances that 40 is the new 30. (Not much of an
assurance since I‟d already seen how that
worked out.) Or is it that 50 is the new 40?
(Which will be great in another decade!) Nev-
ertheless, I knew that turning 40 is a big deal
and that, however the cloud broke, I would
make it through the storm, eventually.
All this was made moot when, two weeks be-
fore my birthday, someone burned my house
down.
Yes, we (my husband Paul, our three kids, my
daughter‟s friend, Hope, who was having a
sleepover, our good dog Jack and a fledging
sparrow our seven-year-old daughter rescued
the day before) were all home, in our beds.
Yes, we all escaped physically unharmed. No,
we don‟t exactly know who or why he
(arsonists are 99.9% of the time male) did it.
All this was made moot when, two
weeks before my birthday, some-
one burned my house down.
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And I had a raging case of PMS. It was during
this inauspicious time that it occurred to me
that my caloric intake exceeded my metabolic
requirements, which sounds so correctable,
except in my head it sounded a little more
like:
“ You‟re OBESE and LAZY! How could you
exercise so LITTLE and how DARE you
even THINK about chocolate, let alone
EAT it! YOU SHOULD BE SHOT!
Or should I say HARPOONED? Oh yeah, and
you‟ve lost your looks, YOU HAG!”
When someone is under duress, I often say,
“Be gracious to yourself” but it rarely occurs
to me to be gracious to myself or if it does,
it‟s a practice I‟ve so little cultivated I don‟t
even know how to start.
The morning of my birth-
day I looked in the mirror
and didn‟t flinch. I
leaned in to get a better
look and despite the fact
that I hadn‟t properly
cleansed my face or worn make-up in eleven
days, I knew I looked fantastic.
“Alive looks great on you!” I told myself. “You
wear it really, really well.”
Nothing could get me down.
Who cares if someone burned down my
house! I was getting a new one! What did it
matter that we lost everything we owned! I
was clutter free for the first time ever! Shock
is wonderful while it lasts. By the time mine
wore off and I figured out that having a house
fire isn‟t all that it‟s cracked up to be I was too
busy rebuilding our life to be neurotic about
turning 40.
For almost six months I able to outrun the
cloud of crazy until the week before Christmas
when I was trying to complete our inventory
for insurance (wherein one gets to list every
single thing one owned, its age, and whether
one bought it new, secondhand or it was a
gift.) all while doing the shopping, wrapping,
cleaning and decorating for Christmas and
packing for a trip to visit family out East.
It goes without saying that I was doing all the
regular duties of a loving wife/mother/bus
driver, when I wasn‟t hiding under the covers
locked in the fetal position.
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But here‟s the good that comes from suffer-
ing, say, losing your home, or a parent or
having a kid with special needs, or getting
laid off, or struggling in a rotten marriage or
having a terrible disease: others, in their gen-
erosity and goodness, show us how to love,
even ourselves.
If a lady, whose house burned down, told me
that she was freaking out because she was
under so much stress and feeling out of
shape and run down I would encourage her
to stand up straight, to check her water in-
take and increase it if necessary, to begin to
listen to her body and stop eating when she‟s
full and to look for small ways to be more
active. So that‟s what I did and it worked. I
didn‟t lose three dress sizes in three days, but
I enjoyed the holidays and spent them hav-
ing fun with my family rather than consumed
by thoughts of self-loathing.
The metaphor of fire burning away rubbish is
a common one. I hope that love and grace
have finally consumed the vestiges of vanity
and irrational shame. They have for now, but
check back with me next month and certainly
in mid-July, 2015.
Alison Hodgson writes and speaks about all the gory de-
tails of writing, mothering and following Jesus. You can
keep up with her at olderthanjesus.blogspot.com. She
lives in Michigan with her husband Paul, their children
and their good dog Jack.
Alison is a favorite guest speaker at our Plainwell Praise
and Coffee Nights in Michigan.
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E very 6 weeks like clockwork
is a scheduled Praise & Cof-
fee night.
And every 6 weeks like clock-
work
It rains.
Torrential downpours.
Lightening.
Thunder.
Wind.
But that doesn‟t keep them
away.
Monday after Monday they
show up.
Eager to fellowship with one an-
other.
Eager to share a meal.
Eager to laugh and cry and pray
and sing.
And those times are the richest and sweetest times. Why? Because there‟s just a few of us gathered to-
gether – usually between 8-12 women from all walks of life.
It‟s intimate.
Praise and Coffee Nights
69
W e share heart to heart what God has been doing in our lives. We share
our hurts, our frustrations, our joys, our triumphs. And we laugh! A lot!
Our group is a great mix of 3 churches – and we‟ve even had some visi-
tors as far away as Beaufort, SC (about a 2 hour drive)!
At first I was a little disappointed that our numbers weren‟t growing. I thought
that there would be more ladies coming out and participating. But after a few
meetings, I realized that this was a great way to meet with other women – in a
small group setting so that we could really take time to share our hearts and
enjoy the fellowship.
I‟ve discovered that having a group this size forces us to really get to know one
another. It gives us ample opportunity to forge friendships. When there are
just a few of us, it‟s harder to keep from connecting.
I find it a little humorous and yet very refreshing that the ladies count down the
weeks until we meet again (not to mention we can also gauge the weather and
expect a great rain!).
You know what?
Don‟t tell them, but I count down the weeks too!
Praise and Coffee Nights
Never uncomfortable as the life of the party, Mary is no stranger to hosting events or
being front and center. So for her, starting a Praise and Coffee night was an easy choice! She is a late 30-something (okay!okay! almost 40) wife and mom to two girls
(14 and 4). When she's not leading worship or teaching at her home church, you can find her online designing websites and doing the social media thing! You can find her on
her blog, on Twitter and on Facebook.
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We love hearing
from you!
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The lessons I learn from
Lauren Written by: Sue Cramer
www.PraiseandCoffee.blogspot.com
These are from our trip to China to bring Lauren home. She had spent the
first 2 years of her life in an orphanage. We were crazy about her from the
first time we saw her. She’s six years old today and still making us smile.
Girl friends!
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T his is a (blurred on purpose) picture
of Lauren and another little girl from China. They are not old
friends, in fact they met just 10 minutes before this was taken
and yet just seconds after this they grasped each others hand
and ran up the stairs.
Lauren was playing in the jumbo
treehouse filled with rambunc-
tious children at the mall while this Momma had a quick latte
and started thumbing through the book I‟d just picked up at
Barnes and Nobel‟s.
It happens all the time.
They (adoptive parents) say that
there is a red cord that connects the daughters of China. I‟m
starting to believe it.
Wherever we go she sees the lit-
tle girls that look like her and
she‟s drawn to them as if she knows they connect.
It always makes me stop and smile. Not only because she has
such a sense of unity with these little girls but also it reminds me
of how we as women relate to others.
We gravitate towards those like us. Think
of the delight when we look at each oth-er, old friend or new, and say, “ME too!!!”
It makes us feel that we belong, that
we‟re connected, we relate to one anoth-er and it validates us in some small way.
It takes the sense of loneliness away and we feel there is someone else that under-
stands our journey, someone who “gets” us.
And you know what...I think that is not
only natural, it is so cool! I believe it‟s how God made us, relational, with a de-
sire to join hearts with girlfriends.
It‟s so beautiful to have healthy relation-
ships with other women. We need to reach out, take a chance on new friends
or connect with old ones.
God just might use that relationship to
sharpen you.
Proverbs 27:17 As iron sharpens iron, so
a friend sharpens a friend. NLT
But you have to see it here in the KJV:
“Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharp-
eneth the countenance of his friend.”
A good friend will put a smile on your
face!
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Want to start a
Praise and Coffee Night
in your community?
Go to: www.PraiseAndCoffee.com Follow the links to
“Start a Praise and Coffee Night”
Start with 2 or 3 girlfriends and see what happens!
Praise and Coffee
P.O. Box 112
Martin, MI 49070
www.PraiseAndCoffee.com
