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A pig, who happens to be a medical school drop out, is responsible for three crazy kids. Join them on their trip to the zoo.
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NAYL
OR
KAN
ARAS
R
YAN
$3.50
ISSUE
#1
PORK N’
BEANS
SERVING SUGGESTIONENLARGED TO SHOW TEXTURE
FULLY COOKEDNET WT 32 PGS. (1 COMIC)
NOW W
ITH
NOW W
ITH
100100..%.
REAL
%. REA
L
KIDS!
KIDS!
Nutrition FactsServing Size 32 pagesServings Per Container 1
Amount Per Serving
Laughs 25 Laughs from Pig 17
% Daily Value*
Total Pig 17 25%
Sarcastic Pig 15 22%
Snide Pig 2 3%
Double Entendre 22 16%
Cynicism 9 15%
Total Slapstick 11 20%
<HTML> 5 10%
*Percent Daily Value are based on a 20 comic diet. Your daily values may be higher or lower
depending on your comic needs.
INGREDIENTS: PAPER, PENCILS, INKS (MATT RYAN), WRITER (DARCY NAYLOR/STEVE KANARAS), ADDED COLORS (JEFF BUSHEY/MATT RYAN)
At Free Lunch Comics we make comics the old fashioned way with pen and ink. With added doses of slapstick, computer code, and
talking animals to our traditional funny kids to create a rip-roaring,
hilarious comic book.
Reading Directions:CHAIR/COUCH:
Get a bag or chips (No Pork Rinds), turn on light. Bend back cover to enjoy.
UNDER COVERS: Get flashlight. Kiss Mom goodnight.
Pull covers over head. Bend back cover to enjoy.
Satisfaction Guaranteed. If you have any questions or comments, please contact us at Free Lunch Comics, P.O. Box 598, Granby, CT 06035 or visit our website at www.freelunchcomics.com
PRESIDENT Matt Ryan
CREATIVE DIRECTOR Steve Kuster
PUBLISHER Steve Kanaras
Pork & Beans #1, 2008 Published by Free Lunch Comics, P.O. Box 598, Granby, CT 06035. “Pork & Beans” is © 2008 Leila Hoffman, Darcy Naylor, and Mike Lantz. All rights reserved. All characters, art, and stories are property of their individual creators. Any similarity to persons living or dead is purely coincidental. With the exception of artwork used for review purposes, none of the contents of this product may be reprinted or redistributed without the permission of the copyright holders.
DISTRUBITED BY: FREE LUNCH COMICS,
P.O. BOX 598, GRANBY, CT 06035 USA
take me to the animals!! i wanna see the penguins!
YAAA!
CRYPTOZOOLOGY!
brainnnssss...
[quote=”mike”]busy. coding.[quote/]
mike, darcy wants to….
grrrrrrr
yawn...
morning, sunshine.
dobriy, utro, svinya.
harasho! i’ll take you to the penguins!! get mike in the car.
i’m off to see the
penguins...
...what wonderful
penguins they are!
i will hug them, and squeeze
them, and swim with the wonderful penguins!
one more word about stupid-looking flightless birds and we’re turning this
car around!
<script type=”text/javascript”><!—script:: Sheep One….Sawing Wood….Sheep Two--></script>
save me, taking back thursday!
EMUS?
YOU’RE GOING TO
GET US ALL KILLED!
PENGUINS!
where are the
penguins?
i could have gone to med school. had
a scholarship. how did i end
up here?
i don’t know, darcy.
hi there, little one.
feed the bearstaunt the bearsmoon the bears
bring it on, ursa.
aren’t you the cutest little penguin?!
oh no! come back!
come back! come back!
i wanna hold you, and love you, and name you “george.”
small salary, room and board,
look after a couple of kids…
how was i supposed to know?
<script type=”text/javascript”><!—script “there darcy goes again” “got to beat the high score”--></script>
welcome fight fans to ultimate zoo
battles! we’ve got a big one for you today! leila takes on
the bear in this modern
day, david and goliath.
leila has her work cut out for her.
whoa! here we go!
k.o. smokey! try this again and you’ll be dancing in the marketplace in
kiev.
sign says don’t feed
the animals, but you
earned it!
DA WINNAH!
uh-oh.
GOTCHA!
you are the cutest penguin in the entire
world, george!
you’re coming
home with me.
DARCY! THE ZOO IS BEING
EVACUATED.
to the porkmobile!
huff, huff
huff, huff
rrooaarr!
[quote=”huff, huff”]
stop pouting, and get out of
there!
NO! YOU ALL HATE GEORGE!
YOU ALL WANT HIM
GONE!
YOU’RE DARN
RIGHT! I WANT THAT THING OUT
OF MY HOUSE.
darcy, if he were really a
penguin…
he is a penguin…or at least will grow into one.
ARE YOU STUPID?
KOMODO DRAGONS
JUST DON’T GROW
UP TO BE PENGUINS!
ok darcy. he’s a
penguin. we don’t have the ability to keep
him here.
but i love him!
i know you do, but he belongs
to the zoo. what would you do
if your pet was taken from you?
i’d look and look and look until i found him or until i
died.
well, that’s how george’s keepers at
the zoo feel about him.
ok, we’ll bring him
back to the zoo.
we’re taking george back! let’s go, mike.
<script> [quote=”annoyed”] still coding [/quote]
A LITTLE HELP HERE,
DARCY!
[quote] gotta go!![/quote]who do we
hog-tie, george or
mike?
so that’s what happened…i’m
really very sorry. i won’t ever, ever, ever, ever do it
again.
that’s okay. come by the pen in twenty
minutes and you can say goodbye to
george!
ok.
now george, even though you still aren’t
allowed out of the your play-pen, i need to
have a serious conversation
with you.
when a manlizard and a wo-
-huh?
are you giving the lizard a
birds and the bees speech?!?
excuse me ma’am, sir pork product, i need to put up this
new sign.
pork product!? who you think you are? i’ll show you pork
product…
HOLY COW!SHE WAS RIGHT!
it says here scientists made a mistake,
the true scientific name of the komodo dragon is actually associated with the common name “penguin” and
to prevent further confusion, the komodo dragon will henceforward be called
“penguin.”
by george, i can’t believe
she was right!
[quote] seriously, omg!?![/quote]
who was right?
george is a
penguin!
see, i told you…
i am always right!
THAT’S ALL BEANS!
LUNCH WAGON bySteve Kanaras
Greetings hungry readers! Welcome to the inaugural Free Lunch Comics’ Lunch Wagon. Every issue, we will be serving up a cornucopia of new products to satisfy any appetite.
After 10 years of publishing Bigger and Dungeon Downloads, Free Lunch Comics has expanded its menu dramatically. We have brought in a throng of comic creating chefs, all looking to show off their various dishes.
First up on the menu is Only in Whispers. Your host, Mr. Quiet serves up a sampling of supernatural stories cooked by a diverse team of creators from the East Coast. Artists Matt Ryan, Stephanie O’Donnell, Anthony Summey join writer/artist Andy Pollock, and writer/editor Steve Kanaras in offering four creepy tales of suspense. Cover Artist Phil Hester adds the perfect presentation to this satisfying entrée.
Get ready for a rip-roaring, high-flying adventure with Sky Pirates of Valendor! This mini-series is the brainchild of Everett and Susan Soares, and runner up in Dimestore Productions Small Press Idol contest. If your tastes run to the exotic, there is nothing better in comics today than the World of Valendor. Discover elves, dwarves, ogres, and of course, Flying Pirate Ships!
Come back to the wagon for a side dish of Pork & Beans! Steve Kanaras, Darcy Naylor
& Matt Ryan team up with stars of the book Darcy, Leila, and Mike for a delectable romp. Norman the Pig tries to keep the Beans in line as Darcy embarks on her quest to find a Penguin, Leila makes a furry friend, and Mike decodes the mysteries of HTML! Have your fill of Pork & Beans!
Get ready for a tasty treat with Norman Katz. Norman presents some of the hottest dishes in the Galaxy. His beautiful rendering of women, angels, demons, and aliens will leave you salivating. A new portfolio of cheesecake art will be available soon.
From the world of Willie Rison and Bigger comes Valhallarie! Matt Ryan’s Nordic heroine discovers modern life, technology, and the joys of bubble gum. Delicious fun for the whole family!
And after you’ve digested all this, join Free Lunch Comics and creator Shawnti Therrien for a midnight snack of Am I Immortal! Enjoy this gothic fairy tale by candlelight. What secrets will be revealed in the inaugural issue entitled, The Mindbreaker?
Come back to the lunch wagon for the freshest and most satisfying comics around from Free Lunch Comics!
Questions or comments, you can contact us at freelunchcomics.com.
SketchboO k
SketchboO k
Pork n’ Beans Pin-up
by Brian BrinleeArtist from Sky Pirates
PRESENTS
CUSTOMER ORDER NO. DATE
NAME
STEVE KANARASNO. description amount
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I wasn’t quite sure what to expect when I got to the trailer. The stories have been told so many times, they are cliché. This was my first interview with a celebrity and I had no other frame of reference than the tales of prima donnas, yelling at the caterer because the donuts were apple cinnamon instead of powdered sugar and jelly, the wrong brand of cigar or what have you. My fragile ego doesn’t take well to being yelled at, and I was almost certain I would cry if abused. I breathed a sigh of great relief then, when Norman the Pig answered the door, in a simple flannel shirt, and not some velvet smoking jacket, as I expected from a megastar.Steve Kanaras: Mr. Pig? I am here to
interview you for the first issue of your new comic.
Norman the Pig: Yes, yes, come in Steve, I’ve been expecting you!
SK: Thank you, sir. Shall we get started with the interview?
N: Certainly, would you like a drink?SK: No thanks. You don’t seem changed at
all by the fame and fanfare? N: I’m a very down to earth pig. What
you see is what you get with me. I’ve never been afraid to get my hands dirty. I’ve taken many jobs before, and don’t consider anything beneath me.
SK: Not afraid to get a little muddy, huh? N: Don’t push your luck, writer boy. I have
low tolerance for punnery.SK: Sorry. Can you tell me how you met
Darcy, Leila and Mike? N: Surely. I was looking for work, a little
depressed after dropping out of medical school. Not my bag, know what I mean? So I was looking through the paper, and the ad was pretty simple. Watch over three children, food, lodging, cash. How could I refuse?
SK: So you went to several years of college to become a babysitter?
N: Listen punk, you keep acting wise, and we cut this short, understand?
SK: Okay, okay, next question. What was it like working with Matt Ryan.
N: Total professional. I think he sometimes drew me with a little excess tonnage, but you know what they say, the inkwell adds ten pounds.
SK: Have you seen the first issue of Pork n’ Beans completed yet?
N: Pork n’ Beans?SK: Yeah, that’s the title of the strip. N: Pork n’ Beans, PORK n’ BEANS? Do
you know how insulting that is? Pork is food.
SK: ummm….calm down, Norman. It’s just a cute play on words.
N: Cute huh? Is that what readers are supposed to think of me? Like a pork chop, or a side of bacon? What if you called it Pig n’ Bushmeat? Would that be cute?
SK: I’m sorry I didn’t mean to make you mad.
N: We all go a little mad sometimes.SK: Okay Norman, I think I’ll… N: Do you have the number to the ACLU?
Tell the staff and Free Lunch Comics to expect a call from my lawyer. Now get out of my trailer…Pork n’ Beans. Those $@#%@s
Well, until next time everyone, enjoy rereading the adventures of Norman and the Kids.
Steve Kanaras
NOW W
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KIDS!
KIDS!
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