middot Think of assertiveness as the halfway point between passive

and aggressive - just the right balance

Assertiveness means expressing your point of view in a Passive Cnmmuoicatioo way that is clear and direct while still respecting Another thing that assertiveness is not is passiveothers Communicating in an assertive manner can help communication Passive communication is you to minimise conflict to control anger to have your

bull Not speaking up for yourself either because you needs better met and to have more positive think your views dont matter or for reasons likerelationships with friends family and others trying to please everyone or keep the peace

bull Putting your needs last to the needs of others Assertiveness is a style of communication which many bull Allowing yourself to be bullied or ignoredpeople struggle to put into practice often because of bull Often involves speaking quietly or with aconfusion around exactly what it means Sometimes it

hesitating voice or with body-language like looking athelps to start by explaining what assertiveness is not the floor or shrugging the shoulders

bull You may undermine your opinions with passiveAggressive Communication -- phrases such as only ifyou dont mind or but it reallyPeople often confuse assertiveness with 11 -- doesnt matter that much to me1aagg-esson because It nvolves sdcldng up

Passive communication can be damaging to your selfshyfor yourself But the two are actually quite - 1 bull ~-esteem and also to relationships If you use a passivedifferent

~~ middot~ - communication style others are more likely to ignore your needs which may leave you feeling hurt or evenAggression Assertiveness angry with them for not treating you betterForce your needs or Express your needs

opinions onto others clearly but respectfully Often involves bullying Others are treated or pushing others around with respect Only your needs matter Considers the needs of

others as well as yours No compromise Often compromise Damages relationships Stronger relationships Here are some tips for practicing being assertive

bull State your point of view or request clearly May lead to shouting or Using clear language physical aggression to get point across bull Tell the other person how you feel as honestly as you

can and remember to listen to what they say as wellDamages self-esteem Builds self-esteem bull Tone and volume of voice how you say it is as

For example imagine you are standing in line at the important as what you say Speak at a normal bank and someone else pushes in front of you An conversation volume rather than a shout or whisper aggressive response could be to grab them by the and make sure that you sound firm but not aggressive shoulder and say loudly bull Make sure your body language matches - your listener

Hey What makes you so important that you dont have will get mixed messages if you are speaking firmly to wait in line like the rest ofus while looking at the floor Try to look the other

person in the eye stand tall and relax your face This might make you feel better in the short term but you will probably also spend the rest of the hour feeling bull Try to avoid exaggerating with words like always and annoyed about the interaction Or perhaps the other never For example You are 20 minutes late and it is the person will shout back at you and the situation will get third time this week rather than You are always late even worse really leaving you in a bad mood bull Try to speak with facts rather than judgements For

example This report has important information missingA more assertive response could be to gently tap the rather than you have done a bad job again person on the shoulder and say in a clear but respectful bull Use I Statements as much as possible to tell the voice other person how you feel rather than be accusing

Excuse me there is actually a line here It would be For example When you leave your dishes on the table I better ifyou could wait your turn like the rest ofus feel frustrated because I dont like the mess but dont want

to clean it up for you rather than Youre such a pigChances are you will get a more positive response to this - perhaps the other person will apologise and move bull Practice often - assertiveness is a skill which requires to the back of the line or they may explain their reason you to practice in many different situations And dont for wanting to push in and you may feel happy to do forget to praise yourself for your good efforts them this favour They may still respond badly - your

This document is for information purposes only Please refer toassertiveness does not guarantee others will not be the full disclaimer and copyright statement available at aggressive - but at least you will feel good knowing that httpltwwwccihealthwagovau regarding the information from you did your best and used assertive communication this website before making use ofsuch information

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