Our Roller Coaster Ride Book

8/6/2019 Our Roller Coaster Ride Book

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From Blog to Book.

http://our-roller-coaster-ride.blogspot.com/


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Contents

1 2009 13

1.1 June . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13

OUR ROLLER COASTER RIDE (2009-06-05 17:30) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13

Going Into Hospital (2009-06-05 17:34) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13

Poorly And Worried(2009-06-05 17:35)

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 14The Bad News (2009-06-05 17:38) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 15

More Hospital And More Tests (2009-06-05 17:39) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 16

A Normal Day? (2009-06-05 17:40) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 16

On Her Way Home (2009-06-05 17:40) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17

Unlpug That Bloody Phone ! (2009-06-05 17:42) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17

Bad Day (2009-06-05 17:43) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 18

Biopsy Results (2009-06-05 17:43) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 18

Blue Badge (2009-06-06 16:22) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 19Wet Sunday (2009-06-07 13:18) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 19

1st Day Back At Work (2009-06-08 18:02) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 19

Oncologist Anti - Climax (2009-06-11 21:18) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 19

GPs Help (2009-06-12 19:15) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 20

Another Weekend Gone (2009-06-14 16:04) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 21

Visit When Shes Better! (2009-06-15 17:00) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 21

Moving Forward, Belly Ache & Worrying (2009-06-17 19:20) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 22

Ouch! Bone Marrow Biopsy. (2009-06-18 16:35) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 22

Eating For England (2009-06-20 09:36) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 22

Cigarettes And Tears (2009-06-20 09:48) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 23

Long 1ST Day Of Treatment (2009-06-23 16:45) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 23

Up And Not Out (2009-06-24 17:47) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 24

Another 5 Liters (2009-06-25 17:16) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 24

Too Much Time To Think (2009-06-27 16:29) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 24

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2ND Treatment Goes Like A Treat (2009-06-29 16:10) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 25

1.2 July . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 25

Still On The Up (2009-07-02 16:26) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 25

Weekend Parole (2009-07-03 19:08) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 26

Race For Life (2009-07-07 18:23) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 26

Getting Bored Of TV (2009-07-08 15:22) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 27

A Few Tears and Its The Weekend (2009-07-10 17:23) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 27

All Good Today (2009-07-11 20:33) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 27

Birthday Party & Next Treatment (2009-07-13 17:16) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 28

Calm Before The Storm (2009-07-16 18:22) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 28

Life Not What It Used To Be (2009-07-17 15:45) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 29

(2009-07-19 08:48) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 29

Monday Again! (2009-07-20 16:01) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 29Tuesdays AHHHH! (2009-07-21 19:55) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 30

Hospital Check Up (2009-07-22 16:11) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 30

Our 5TH Wedding Anniversary (2009-07-24 18:36) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 30

Making The Most Of It (2009-07-25 17:24) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 31

Night Before (2009-07-26 17:09) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 31

1ST Radiotherapy Treatment (2009-07-27 18:27) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 31

Where Is Everyone? (2009-07-28 20:59) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 32

1ST Day Of Chemo (2009-07-29 04:32) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 32Looking Good And Feeling Great (2009-07-30 18:10) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 32

Feeling Tired (2009-07-31 18:25) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 33

1.3 August . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 33

Michelles Attitude (2009-08-01 16:32) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 33

I Had Been warned! (2009-08-02 16:27) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 34

My First Radiotherapy Day (2009-08-03 19:09) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 34

Into Our 2ND Week (2009-08-04 16:06) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 34

Catching Up With Us (2009-08-07 17:57) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 35

Wheelchair & Tears (2009-08-09 07:23) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 35

Getting Upset. (2009-08-10 15:48) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 36

Good Old Steroids (2009-08-13 17:59) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 36

Weekend Fun? (2009-08-15 08:06) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 37

Bloody Wheelchair! (2009-08-17 17:31) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 37

Stressed Out (2009-08-18 17:06) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 37

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I put On My Tunes And Im Ready For The Weekend! (2009-08-21 18:41) . . . . . . . . . . 38

Baby Sitting & Helicopter Ride (2009-08-23 14:46) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 38

Last Week Of Radiotherapy & Down (2009-08-24 18:11) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 39

Treatment Over & A Rest (2009-08-28 18:34) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 39

Bit Down & Sore (2009-08-29 15:41) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 40

Quiet Day & Relaxing (2009-08-30 13:09) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 40

Sleepy (2009-08-31 17:30) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 41

1.4 September . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 41

Our Roller Coaster Ride Continues (2009-09-01 17:02) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 41

Last Chemotherapy (2009-09-03 16:51) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 41

Things To Look Forward To (2009-09-04 15:46) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 41

Weekend Gone Again (2009-09-06 16:55) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 42

Monday Fun (2009-09-07 18:29) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 42Last Weeks catch Up (2009-09-12 16:16) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 42

Nervous & Shopping (2009-09-13 15:31) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 43

Radiotherapy Treatment (2009-09-16 12:16) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 43

Feeling Better (2009-09-17 16:58) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 43

Busy, Busy, Busy (2009-09-20 09:21) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 44

Weeks Catch Up (2009-09-25 18:30) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 45

Stay In Saturday (2009-09-26 16:30) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 46

Stay At Home Weekend (2009-09-27 11:28) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 46CT Scan and another anti-climax (2009-09-30 15:05) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 46

1.5 October . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 47

Tired Weekend (2009-10-03 18:29) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 47

5 Months On (2009-10-06 18:06) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 47

Calendar Photographs (2009-10-07 18:43) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 48

Our Photograph (2009-10-09 15:04) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 48

Lucky? (2009-10-11 10:14) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 49

Where Has The Week Gone? (2009-10-15 19:00) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 49

Playing Catch Up (2009-10-20 17:07) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 50

Back To Square One (2009-10-22 17:10) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 50

Reality Bite (2009-10-23 16:29) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 51

Laugh & Not Cry (2009-10-25 08:50) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 51

Nice Chat (2009-10-26 18:15) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 52

Looking Like Myra Hindley! (2009-10-27 19:11) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 52

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Long Week (2009-10-30 17:43) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 52

1.6 November . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 53

Wheel chair in.......Wheel chair out (2009-11-02 15:52) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 53

Mid Week Nightmare (2009-11-04 18:08) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 54

Kay away and my turn (2009-11-06 18:17) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 54

Like the good old days (2009-11-07 17:16) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 54

Another day, another dollar (2009-11-09 16:18) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 55

The Night Before Results (2009-11-11 16:19) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 55

Good & Bad (2009-11-14 09:43) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 55

Making cakes and staying in. (2009-11-15 13:11) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 56

Welcome to cycle 2 (2009-11-19 17:16) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 57

What the difference a day makes (2009-11-20 19:08) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 57

Crying with laughter (2009-11-21 19:12) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 58

Just How It Is (2009-11-22 14:19) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 58

Ewwww I cant eat that (2009-11-24 18:55) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 58

Its out of the box! (2009-11-25 16:52) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 59

Catching up with her (2009-11-26 17:53) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 59

Feeling ................. (2009-11-28 17:20) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 59

Michelles Birthday (2009-11-29 18:55) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 60

1.7 December . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 60

Quiet Michelle (2009-12-01 18:16) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 60

Our Calendar (2009-12-02 18:00) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 61

Lump in my throat (2009-12-03 15:45) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 61

Tired and no sleep (2009-12-04 19:13) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 61

Michelles Mum (2009-12-05 15:30) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 61

Look At His Beard (2009-12-06 14:35) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 62

In The Newspaper (2009-12-08 17:45) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 62

Chemo, puppy and one dead rabbit! (2009-12-10 17:54) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 63

Shop Lifter! (2009-12-11 17:36) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 64

Tears for Simon (2009-12-12 16:48) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 65

TV Fame !! (2009-12-14 16:28) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 65

Return Of Pain (2009-12-16 17:54) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 66

Get The Beer In (2009-12-17 17:59) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 66

Weekend before Christmas (2009-12-19 18:56) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 67

Bad News All Round (2009-12-22 18:45) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 67

Christmas Eve (2009-12-24 15:29) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 68

Our 2009 Christmas (2009-12-27 15:07) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 68

Hair loss & Waiting (2009-12-31 09:45) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 69

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2 2010 71

2.1 January . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 71

Welcome to 2010 (2010-01-01 15:54) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 71

Tears & Shopping (2010-01-02 17:22) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 72

Back to work but for how long? (2010-01-05 16:53) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 72

Off Some Foods (2010-01-07 17:09) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 73

Just The Two Of Us (2010-01-09 17:55) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 73

Staying In (2010-01-10 14:51) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 73

Results Day (2010-01-14 18:02) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 74

Visit Sheila & Big Surprise (2010-01-15 18:07) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 75

The Big Sort Out (2010-01-17 10:25) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 76

Dont do a flopper in Iceland! (2010-01-18 18:30) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 76

Pre- Chemo Day (2010-01-19 18:56) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 77Cycle 5 & Sick Note (2010-01-20 18:32) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 77

Time To Work? (2010-01-21 19:33) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 78

Fish Finger Fetish (2010-01-22 19:03) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 78

Escaped From A Home (2010-01-23 16:01) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 79

3am and 3 Pork Pies (2010-01-24 14:52) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 79

Getting Upset (2010-01-25 18:43) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 80

Visiting Day (2010-01-27 10:49) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 80

The Good, The Bad & The Hospital (2010-01-31 11:14) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 812.2 February . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 83

In Hospital Blogging (2010-02-01 19:06) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 83

Knockout! (2010-02-02 15:36) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 83

Remembering The Start All Over Again. (2010-02-05 19:16) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 84

Back Out Shopping (2010-02-06 16:27) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 85

Is Anybody There? (2010-02-07 18:38) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 85

Decorating..DONE! Cycle 6...DONE! (2010-02-10 16:18) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 86

Our Quality Time (2010-02-12 15:21) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 86

Double Doctors Date (2010-02-15 18:08) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 87

Unconditional Love (2010-02-16 17:29) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 87

Chicken Pox! (2010-02-18 09:50) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 88

Hibernation (2010-02-19 14:51) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 89

Taking Things For Granted (2010-02-20 17:12) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 89

1st Day Back At Work (2010-02-22 18:51) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 90

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Just Got To Wait................ (2010-02-23 20:06) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 90

Visitors All Day Long (2010-02-27 08:51) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 91

Eating For England ( Im sure I must of used this title before!) (2010-02-27 20:13) . . . . . 91

2.3 March . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 92

Dont Feel Sorry For Us (2010-03-01 19:25) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 92

The Night Before The Not Knowing (2010-03-02 19:10) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 93

Michelle is Terminal.......or is she? (2010-03-04 17:07) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 93

Back On The Ride (2010-03-05 18:05) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 94

Posh Lunch (2010-03-06 18:45) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 95

Taking Our Time & Butterflies (2010-03-08 16:45) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 96

Morning Sickness (2010-03-10 12:20) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 96

The Longest Day Ever (2010-03-11 19:26) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 97

Getting On With Life (2010-03-13 16:47) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 98Mothers Day 2010 (2010-03-14 19:52) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 99

PET Scan (2010-03-17 15:05) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 99

A Day To Remember (2010-03-20 14:09) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 100

Black Plant Pot (2010-03-21 17:45) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 101

Finally PET Scan Day (2010-03-22 17:08) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 101

My Old Michelle, Curtains & Pork Pies (2010-03-23 20:25) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 102

Mixed Emotions (2010-03-24 17:26) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 102

Feeling A Bit Down (2010-03-25 12:53) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 103Visitors (2010-03-26 18:41) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 104

Keeping Busy (2010-03-27 18:27) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 104

Staying In (2010-03-28 19:19) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 105

Visitors and Memories (2010-03-30 18:23) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 106

2.4 April . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 107

Bay City Rollers (2010-04-01 12:08) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 107

Easter Bug (2010-04-03 19:02) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 107

Breath Of Fresh Air (2010-04-06 18:56) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 108

Matts Back! (2010-04-07 19:27) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 108

A Normal Busy Day In a Normal Life (2010-04-09 17:27) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 108

Fencing & Tracys Birthday (2010-04-10 22:35) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 109

Fencing done. (2010-04-11 19:32) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 110

Rubbish & Arguements (2010-04-13 19:36) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 110

The Good Old Days (2010-04-15 21:09) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 110

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Hassle Off The Neighbours (2010-04-18 17:17) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 111

The Corner I Hate (2010-04-23 14:06) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 112

A Week Of Gardening.......Done! (2010-04-25 20:38) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 112

Return Of The Tears (2010-04-28 15:52) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 113

The Wasp (2010-04-29 19:04) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 114

2.5 May . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 115

Normality (2010-05-01 19:34) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 115

Last Day Of The Summer Holidays (2010-05-03 15:53) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 115

4AM Shock (2010-05-04 20:07) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 116

End Of A Long Week (2010-05-08 21:00) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 116

Redundant Wheel Chair (2010-05-09 16:08) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 116

Shopping For.......... (2010-05-12 20:22) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 117

Getting On With It (2010-05-13 19:24) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 118Manda & Petes Wedding - A fantastic Weekend. (2010-05-16 13:16) . . . . . . . . . . . . . 118

Not Sleeping With a Busy Week (2010-05-18 15:16) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 121

Fat Army Men! (2010-05-22 19:59) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 122

Were just.....................normal? (2010-05-26 17:33) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 122

Leeanne & James Wedding! (2010-05-28 20:24) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 123

One Year On. (2010-05-29 18:48) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 123

2.6 June . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 124

Back On The Ride (2010-06-01 16:16) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 124And Now The Waiting........... (2010-06-03 15:58) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 124

Warts and all. (2010-06-06 13:46) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 125

Race For Life@Loughborough (2010-06-13 16:05) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 125

Shopping & Diet (2010-06-14 17:56) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 126

Never Stop Worrying. (2010-06-15 20:11) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 127

CT Results And A Long Day (2010-06-19 09:12) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 128

Lillys Chistening. (2010-06-20 15:46) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 131

Champix & HGV Test (2010-06-21 17:40) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 132

Too Hot To Do Anything. (2010-06-22 17:27) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 132

Week Off And Broken TV (2010-06-25 15:59) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 133

It Always comes In Threes. (2010-06-27 09:49) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 134

2.7 July . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 135

And relax........... (2010-07-01 19:12) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 135

Breakdown, Hunger and Stomach Ache. (2010-07-03 10:12) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 135

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Shopping...Hospital....Plants............ (2010-07-04 15:21) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 137

Hospital Appointment (2010-07-07 15:27) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 138

Sad News (2010-07-09 21:42) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 139

Bloody Car! (2010-07-11 20:10) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 139

Biopsy Date Set (2010-07-12 20:20) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 140

My Turn At The Doctors (2010-07-13 18:08) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 141

Biopsy (2010-07-14 09:53) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 141

Matts Back (2010-07-15 20:26) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 143

No Exciting Title....Normal Weekend. (2010-07-18 10:10) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 143

Our 6TH Wedding Anniversary (2010-07-25 10:51) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 144

Sleeping Tablets (2010-07-27 11:17) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 145

Half Full Or Half Empty (2010-07-31 09:03) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 146

2.8 August . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 147Back To The Gym (2010-08-02 20:22) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 147

Two Fat Army Men............ Again! (2010-08-06 18:52) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 147

Idris Morris ( Chris ) (2010-08-07 18:45) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 148

Doing It All Wrong. (2010-08-11 11:20) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 149

Thinking Time (2010-08-12 19:02) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 150

Why Do Diets Always Start On A Monday? (2010-08-13 19:56) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 151

Results Day Looming (2010-08-15 17:02) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 151

The Night Before...... (2010-08-17 19:13) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 152Blogging in Hospital Awaiting Results (2010-08-18 09:48) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 153

Printing Blog (2010-08-19 19:25) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 154

WOW! (2010-08-22 10:35) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 154

Long Pre-Wedding Week (2010-08-27 20:56) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 156

Leanne & James Wedding (2010-08-30 18:18) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 157

The Hangover (2010-08-31 16:52) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 160

2.9 September . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 161

Looking Back....looking forward..... (2010-09-04 10:49) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 161

Mr. Pete Davis (2010-09-05 16:06) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 162

Restless Night And Tired Day (2010-09-06 15:47) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 163

Big Boys Birthday! (2010-09-09 17:18) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 164

CT Scan & Day Dreaming (2010-09-10 18:55) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 164

The weekend (2010-09-12 18:53) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 165

Should We Carry On? (2010-09-14 08:46) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 166

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Great News & Panic (2010-09-15 18:34) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 167

Blackpool (2010-09-18 10:26) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 168

Petes Funeral (2010-09-18 14:18) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 172

Too Early For Christmas Shopping? (2010-09-20 18:12) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 173

Home Alone (2010-09-22 18:20) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 174

The Dog, My Mum & A Hangover (2010-09-25 10:12) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 175

Our Blog Turned Into A Book (2010-09-26 10:57) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 176

2.10 October . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 176

Time For A Change? (2010-10-10 11:01) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 176

A van, A Mattress & A Change (2010-10-11 17:56) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 177

No Getting Away From It (2010-10-12 18:37) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 178

Busy & Not Enough Hours (2010-10-19 17:53) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 179

Hospital & Shopping (2010-10-20 19:54) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 180

Surprise Phone Call (2010-10-21 19:38) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 180

Man Flu & Baby Sitting (2010-10-24 14:02) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 181

2.11 November . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 182

Changing Situation (2010-11-07 11:27) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 182

Week Off Work (2010-11-14 08:34) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 183

Winter Bug & Cold (2010-11-21 11:39) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 184

Snow & Snoring (2010-11-28 09:21) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 184

2.12 December . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 185

Mid Week Blog! (2010-12-01 15:18) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 185

Birthday, Death & Worry (2010-12-11 09:23) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 186

Sunday Morning Blog (2010-12-12 11:00) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 187

Bloody Hospitals! (2010-12-15 15:26) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 187

Emotional (2010-12-18 07:48) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 188

Were Going To Be Grand Parents!! (2010-12-22 15:32) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 189

19 Months Along Our Ride. (2010-12-24 16:32) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 190

Boxing Day 2010 (2010-12-26 13:34) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 190

New Years Eve 2010 (2010-12-31 19:42) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 191

3 2011 193

3.1 January . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 193

Busy Start To 2011 (2011-01-08 10:26) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 193

Never Know Whats Around The Corner (2011-01-16 09:47) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 194

The Night Before (2011-01-18 18:00) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 195

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Lymphoma Results with A Wobble (2011-01-22 08:54) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 195

Roller Coasting To The Top (2011-01-29 08:47) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 197

A Very Funny Night (2011-01-30 11:22) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 198

1ST Day Back At School (2011-01-31 16:30) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 198

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Chapter 1

2009

1.1 June

OUR ROLLER COASTER RIDE (2009-06-05 17:30)

Our Roller Coaster Journey

This is my diary of our roller coaster of a ride in our battle to get Michelle well again.

We went away for our second weekend to Sheffield after wed had a big row about all sorts ofstuff and we decided we needed time to ourselves once a month. It was the weekend of 18thApril 2009.

Michelle had a bath in our hotel room and I started to look at her body and noticed that shewas losing weight but her belly looked big, I joked and called her a fat bellied Ethiopian! Andwe laughed about it.

A couple of weeks went by and her belly was getting bigger & bigger but Michelle still wentto work.

Going Into Hospital (2009-06-05 17:34)

I eventually got her to go to the doctors, which she did on Monday 11th May.He examined her and said he thought it may be a problem with her liver or kidney and booked her in forblood tests at Coalville doctors.Matthew took Michelle up the next day for blood tests, and then on the Wednesday Janet & Joyce took herto Coalville hospital for an ultrasound scan which the doctor had also booked.The following Tuesday 19Th May Michelle went back to the doctor, and he told her the blood tests hadcome back all clear and her scan had showed lots of fluid.And he was now booking an appointment for a CT scan at one of the Leicester hospitals.He actually came around the house on the Wednesday to see Michelle out of the blue to see if she was OK.Hed told Michelle that someone would be phoning her in the next two days to arrange her CT scan, but we

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waited and no one did.On Sunday 24Th May 2009 we both woke up and Michelle hadnt slept well again because of the size of herbelly, and I told her she needed to go to hospital.She replied with Its going to be a nice day today, lets wait until Tuesday to see Dr LewisShe lay in bed and I told her Id phone the out of hours doctors number, which I did and told the lady allthe details about what had been going on.After about 10Mins a doctor called back and spoke to Michelle for about 1/2 hour and basically said waituntil Tuesday when you GP reopens, but if you did feel you wanted to go to the walk in centre then shedsend all the information over to them.So we got ready and took a ride over to Lough boroughs walk in centre, took our seat and waited to see thenurse.We got called in and as soon as Michelle sat down she burst into tears, told the nurse everything and shewas so nice and let us wait in the plaster room to see the doctors next.After about 15 mins the doctor came and took us to her room, who funnily enough was Michelles mums GPDr Elizabeth Hall.She examined Michelle and said that shed have to go into hospital as she needed 1 1/2 liters of fluid drainingfrom her belly.We waited back in reception and about 10mins later she came back out with a letter to go to Leicester Royal.

On that Sunday 24th May we arrived on ward 19 of the LRI at 11.45 am, handed our letter in and was toldwhere Michelles bed was.They were so short staffed that day with lots of admissions, and apart from one nurse for 5 mins; we didntsee a doctor for 5 hours!When he came he did blood test and left a canola in, much to Michelles disgust as it was in the middle ofher arm and she was moaning that she couldnt bend her arm!It had been a long day and I left Michelle at around 7pm to go home.It was letter that night the consultant came around and said that shed be having a CT scan on Monday, sohad a drip put up and was nil by mouth.

Poorly And Worried (2009-06-05 17:35)

I went to see her the next day, pain of visiting hours on that ward was 2-3pm then 7-8pm.And shed still not had a scan and was feeling very hungry.She had a little cry, as others had come in and had their scans and everyone was eating apart from her.She did get her scan the next morning, Tuesday 26th May 2009 and was then moved to ward 8.Visiting hours were strict on there, the bell went of at 3pm and everyone had to go.Shaun and Viv came to visit whilst I and Joyce were there.Michelle wasnt eating because of her large belly, she tried half a sandwich and that gave her the runs.Matthew and Millie turned up to visit and Michelle had another try at something to eat but rushed to the

toilet again, this time making a little mess so we pulled the curtains around so I could help clean her up andshe got upset and had a cry, I held her and told her it would all be OK.On Wednesday 27th May 2009 Michelle was seen by Mr. Ireland who had come across from maternity to seeher and asked her if shed be OK to move over there, which she agreed.She moved over to Ward 1 of the maternity department and had her own on suite room.The tests now started thick and fast, she had a smear, biopsy of her womb and a drain put in to startremoving the fluid from her belly.That first night they drained 5 liters of fluid from her belly, but then had to turn it off as they had to do itslowly so you wouldnt feel too ill.Thursday 28th May I was visiting Michelle when a senior nurse came in called Louise.

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She started to ask what the doctors had said; Michelle said Mr. Ireland had told her that her womb didntlook the right shape.And Louise started to talk about tests for cancer and that wed find of the results from the CT scan, smearand biopsy Friday morning when the doctors came around.I was starting to worry now after someone had mentioned the BIG C word.At the end of visiting I kissed Michelle goodbye and told her Id see her in the morning, as the nurse saidthat it would be OK for me to be there when Mr. Ireland came around.I went to the nurses station and saw Louise and asked if I could have a word with her in private, we satdown and I got upset and told her I was worried about Michelle.And she said that she was poorly and waits to see what Mr. Ireland said in the morning.

The Bad News (2009-06-05 17:38)

On FRIDAY 29th MAY 2009 I got to the hospital for 7am, we chatteduntil about 7.50 am and I saw some doctors arrive.I said to Michelle has he got grey hair and glasses, and she said that sounded like him.About 5mins later Mr. Ireland walked in with Louise, who shut the door behind her, I sat back in the bluecomfy chair and Mr. Ireland shook both our hands.Her opened his folder and said that theyd had the results back and they had found cancerous cells at theneck of the womb, but it didnt really sink in to either of us.He carried on to explain that one of her lymph nodes was quite enlarged and was pressing on her liver, whichhad caused all the fluid build up in her belly.He said that there was a possibility that the lymph node was cancerous too and they would be doing a biopsyto find this out.The sentence that I keep hearing to keep positive is when her said to Michelle that, although her cervicalcancer was too big to operate on (she was stage 4) THIS IS TREATABLE.To which Michelle sort of flung her head back and said It is? Thank goodness for that

We were then left on our own for a while and didnt really know what to say, neither of us cried.And I said to Michelle I cant believe it, youve got cancerAnd she said At least they can treat it, I dont know what Id of done if they couldnt, Id of died!Tears started to come eventually, and after a big hug and cry we tried to stay positive.I went outside on my mobile to tell people, I phoned Joyce, Janet and Shaun. And cried every time I toldsomeone.I phoned Michelles friend Gaynor and she was in floods of tears saying No Patrick not Michelle noIt had been a long day and I told Michelle I was going home, it was about 6pm, I kissed her and told herthat Id see her the next day.I walked out the room and started to cry, and carried on crying all the way to the car.Started to drive home crying, and got on the A511 and just shouted out, Not Michelle please not Michelle

I dont know what Id do without herI got home and sat down at the dining room table and cried, walked around crying and couldnt rest.I phoned Joyce to see if she wanted to go back to the hospital to see Michelle.I drove down, swapped car and set off back to Leicester.Got there about 6.50pm, so had just over another hour with Michelle. And we left around 8.15pm.I got home and felt so alone and upset, and started to look on the internet about cancer and cancer supportSites Louise had told me about, although she did warn me to stay away from looking up too much as it couldmuddle your brain.Id now started to get in into my head that, what if the doctors found more cancer and they said she couldntbe cured, my head was a mess.

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I came across a site called www. whatnow.org.uk/ and it was a Macmillan based site for patients and careersand so I joined up with my details.Went on their chat room and everyone was so friendly, in particular a man called Andy Hill, his wife Emmahad found out 3 weeks early shed got breast cancer and it had spread to 28 lymph nodes.So hed been in our situation 3 weeks previous.We exchanged messages and very kindly said that hes light a candle for Michelle at Litchfield cathedral.And said that we all needed something to look forward to so how about all meeting up for a slap up mealwhen all this is over.

More Hospital And More Tests (2009-06-05 17:39)

Saturday 30th May came and I was feeling really down, walked to post a letter and went home, kept lookingat the clock to see if it was time to visit Michelle.Walked to the paper shop, got my newspapers and walked home again.Then I got all my gear together, went up Coalville to get some things for Michelle.Went to my mums and made him some sandwiches and picked Janet up.

On the way there we had to find a Mc Donalds because Michelle wanted a chocolate milkshake!Got to the hospital and Matthew and Millie were there, they went as we came and Michelle started hermilkshake and sandwich.They now drained around 8 or 9 liters of fluid from Michelles belly so she felt well enough to eat a fewthings, sandwichs, Thorntons etc.She hadnt been to the toilet for 5 days so asked for something to help her go.We left Michelle at 6.30pm to watch Britains Got Talent final on her TV.Its now Sunday 31st May 2009 and Im sat at my pc, feeling a little better and wanted to write down whathad happened so far.Been on my website and they said not to look at everything as a big picture but to take each day at a time,so I thought that writing this diary would help us remember what were going through and how far weve

come.Ive just spoken to Michelle on the phone and shes managed to go to the toilet which shes relieved at, andher drain has slowed right down and the doctors told her hopefully they will take it out Monday.The next big step is waiting for the results of the 2nd biopsy of the lymph nodes, which we should get eitherWednesday or Thursday and then hopefully the team can put a plan of action together to start treatment.Michelle will have to go Mon - Fri for 5 weeks for Radiotherapy and one day a week for chemotherapy.So thats where were up to now, its Sunday morning 9.47am 31st May 2009.Ill now start to write this diary day by day...............................................

A Normal Day? (2009-06-05 17:40)

Tuesday 2 June 2009:Another red hot day and more wash to do!Michelle had a cup of coffee in bed and I could of lay in bed all day, maybe because I was relaxed knowingthat she was home.She got up and had a wash and walk in the garden, but again feeling tired so shes off for a lay down on thebed.I took time out to read Mandas blog today and her latest entry.I was amazed how much her day felt like mine.

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I was in that dark place Saturday, the day after Michelles bad news.I walked up the road (dont know why!) then back home.Sat down and walked to the paper shop, then back home.Michelle was still in hospital at the time and I just kept thinking the worst again and couldnt get it out ofmy mind, no matter how hard I tried.And as for Mandas memory I knew what she meant.Ive got so many things to do I have to write a list out each night so I don t forget.Still dreading this Thursday when we get results from biopsy, time seems to be dragging.Right! Shopping list to sort out, but I cant do that until the district nurse has been so might do somehovering!Im not looking forward to going back to work next Monday after two weeks off, its the thought of leavingMichelle on her own.Well Ive had enough time on here now, better crack on.We both just want to sleep all day&&&&&

On Her Way Home (2009-06-05 17:40)

Monday 1st June, 2009:Started sorting the house out when Shaun phoned to say Michelle had been to contact to say she could comeout of hospital today!!I called Michelle and she said doctors had been around and said that she might as well be at home and thencome back on Thursday for the results of the lymph node biopsy ( and god are we dreading that )So now it all gun blazing to get the house cleaned for Michelle.Sarah mowed the lawn, Joyce made the bed and cleaned up.I went to the nursery and bought all plants and did all her hanging baskets, so it all looked lovely when itwas all done.But seem to be running out of hours in the day!

Got her home mid afternoon but she was really tired today, so had a look at her garden and now gone for alay down on the bed with the fan on.Ive found five mins to sit down now to write our diary.Got forms to fill out so shes exempt from paying for medication and another sick note to send off.Phone and mobiles ringing all the time, which is understandable but she just too tired today and doesn treally want to talk to anyone.Hopefully a bath and good nights sleep in her own bed will do her good.

Unlpug That Bloody Phone ! (2009-06-05 17:42)

Wednesday 3rd June 2009:We both didnt get up until 9.30am, cant remember the last time I got up that late.Michelles really tired again and had to motivate her to have a wash and get dressed.One of her best friends from the college, Tina is coming to see her today.Ive got a Gardner coming around to price up how much it ll be to keep doing the garden.So Im hoping its going to be more relaxing today, just feel tired so god only know what Michelle feels like.Just hoping that the phone doesnt ring too much today or it might just end up out of the window.Itll be bed early tonight because up really in the morning for biopsy results

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Bad Day (2009-06-05 17:43)

Friday 5th June 2009:We didnt want to get up today!Michelle lay in bed whilst I did the whole house in one big swoop.Then Id just come out the shower and all hell let loose, everyone turned up at the same time.

The men from Marliene Reid Centre to pick up our old table and chairs and then a knock at the door so Ianswered it in my towel and it was the district nurse!Michelle was in the bathroom so she went up stairs to her.After shed gone it was so nice, no phone ringing, nothing to do&&&.so Michelle had a lay down on thebed because she thinks shes pulled a muscle in her leg and it really hurts.Can you believe it, two types of cancer in her body and shes moaning about a stiff leg!Michelles boss at college Maggie came to see her this afternoon, so gave me a chance to go to the gym andget out of the house&.so nice.When I got back Michelle was in bed freezing, and said her body just ached all over and she was thirsty allthe time.Shes had a tablet and lots of drinking and warming up a bit so Ive left her to rest.Still dreading going back to work Monday but needs must.

Biopsy Results (2009-06-05 17:43)

Thursday 4th June 3 2009:We both didnt sleep well, tossing & turning.Got to the hospital early to beat the traffic and sitting about waiting seemed like ages.I dropped Michelle off and parked the car, when I got to the hospital she was sat on the bench between twosmokers&..that really helped.

Whilst we were sat waiting she just kept thinking about smoking then.We were called in by Louise at bang on 8.30am and went in to see Mr. Gardner (A lovely man).He told us that the lymph nodes had no sign of cancer spreading from the cervix, but hadn t got all theresults back to see if it was a different sort.He said hed phone us after 2pm if the results had come in.We went back to the car not really knowing if it was good or bad news.On the way home we stopped off at a food van and Michelle had a bacon, mushroom & egg cob and ate itall except one mouthful, I was very impressed.She wanted to go a ride over to Tracy s house so I could sort the Nintendo Wii out.We had about an hour there and came back home to wait for the phone call, it ran about 6 times and thenmy mobile went off whilst Michelle was on the phone to Josh.It was Louise from the hospital, said shes tried the house phone but engaged.

She asked if it was OK to tell me the results, I said yes and she started&&&&&&&&&&..Turns out its a type of Lymphoma that is LOW GRADE TYPE B.Still wasnt sure if its good news or what, if that makes sense!Anyway the Oncologist Mr. Simons is going to phone Friday to arrange an appointment to see him nextThursday.So as Andy Hill taught me, thats another one to tick off the list.Im thinking its a MC Donalds for Michelle and a beer for me now.And its still only tea time, another roller coaster day.

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Blue Badge (2009-06-06 16:22)

Its a lazy day today.Done all my washing and drying and only one phone call today.Everywhere just seems so quiet, but thats good because Michelles cold and tired again.One thing that did pick her is is that it seems we might be able to get a blue badge for the car?Dont know if we can, will have to look into it Monday.Shes so chuffed, and said Just think we can go to B &Q and park right outsideI laughed and said to her Why do you fancy going to B &Q then? She said Not really!Michelles just about caught up with all her Sky + programmes which she missed when she was in hospitalbut now Big Brother has started so shes in her element.Ill finish my blog and then do.................NOTHING !! YES !

Wet Sunday (2009-06-07 13:18)

Its been raining all weekend so we havent been anywhere, Michelles too tired anyway.This Sunday is like the day before you go back to school after the big holidays, getting my uniform out etc.Bought a new phone from EBay yesterday with an answering machine because Michelle dreads the phoneringing all the time, she just feel that she wants to be on her own.So when Im at work she can put it on and call anyone back if she wants to, I bet that sounds awful but itsjust how she feels right now.The Oncologist never phoned Friday so I hope they do Monday so we can see them Thursday and make astart with treatment.

1st Day Back At Work (2009-06-08 18:02)

Well my alarm went off at 4am and after two weeks off it felt like the middle of the night.And hated every minute today, not being with Michelle and worrying about her.Also was thinking about Andy & Emma today as it was their first Chemo session, weve got that to lookforward to.Hospital phoned back and we are to see the Oncologist Dr. Simmons on Thursday at 2pm.Came back from work and did the house work, Michelle ate really well today : Toast & Tea, Sunday Dinner(from yesterday! ), MC Donalds and Jelly for her tea!Also ordered some more Fortisip from the doctors..........Yummy!Wont take much rocking tonight, and looking for to our first visit to Oncology.

Oncologist Anti - Climax (2009-06-11 21:18)

I had to do 4 hours at work today to get paid a full day and not use another holiday, work has been greatlike that.Jayne came to do Michelles hair about an hour before we went, she put some make up on and looked well,although still very thin.We got to the hospital 1/2 hour early ( as usual! ) and took our seats in the waiting room.

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Dont know if it was just me but everyone seems to be talking about losing their hair and wigs, which didntdo Michelle much good.Then a nurse called us in to see the consultant, she said it was really busy and usually the consultant has achat and then an examination.No such luck for us, examination first, which I went out the room.Then I was called back in to Michelle who was sitting on her own, we sat there and heard through the doorthe consultant talking about her (which I thought was really bad)After a few mins we were called back in with the specialist Lymphoma nurse & a cancer nurse ( who wereboth so nice )The consultant carried on to say that he needed to discuss her case more with a professor to try and treatthe Lymphoma & cervical cancer at the same time.And that we should come back next Wednesday!All he seems interested in was talking to the nurses about raising money from different drug companys tofund student learning.So STILL no bloody answers!Why hadnt he talked to the professor before?Anyway after a blood test we drove home rather pissed off and have to wait more time until they plan hertreatment, wait....wait....and more waiting.

Now tired after LOADS of MORE washing and off to bed.Can you tell Im not happy! ???

Manda and Pete (2009-06-11 22:58:07)

Patrick & Michelle

I am so sorry you didnt get your answers today. I really thought it might be the turning point appointment for

you. On a positive, once they tell you what the treatment plan is, you feel ike something is happening, and everything

starts to move quite quickly. The waiting is hard though, but not long now.

Keep busy and keep smiling

Manda & Pete

Andy (2009-06-12 16:09:55)

Got to agree with Manda and Pete. Once things kick in then it all seems to happen at once. Although the waiting

does seem to go on and on.

Praying for you guys.

Andy & Emma.

GPs Help (2009-06-12 19:15)

Ive had a good day at work today and Michelles had a busy one.

Weve put yesterday behind us now and look forward to next Wednesday.The district nurse, then GP turned up today, and they have both been fantastic.The nurse has ordered some flavoured mouses as Michelle hates those Fortisip drinks, and asked the GP forsome medication as her Lymph Node in her back as its hurting, and he wrote a prescrition out straight away.Our GP also told her to fill forms out for a Blue Badge, bus pass and disablility living allowance, which wasa big surprise as I work full time and Michelle gets full pay for 6 months.The answering machine is working a treat!Michelle went out on the front today to say goodbye to her brother Tracy, hed called in to see us as hedbeen in Coalville.And some neighbours came out to shed sympathy and kind words, sorry that sounds awful but I know that

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Manda & Andy will know what I mean!They were shocked at her weight loss I think, she said she was tired and made a quick exit.Shes now sat eating a salad and looking forward to her jelly, Im thinking that shell soon start looking likea jelly if she eats anymore.Time for Coronation Street now, ermmm I mean....... big night out with a nightclub to finish!!! LOL. Notat my age...awwwwwwwwww.( too much washing )

Another Weekend Gone (2009-06-14 16:04)

Saturday was a quiet day, we didnt go anywhere or do anything ( much the norm now )The phone has slowly stopped ringing.Sunday was such a hot day and was determined to get Michelle out of the house.She suggested we go to the local garden centre ( she loves her garden ) and my mum wanted to come up tosee her but I knew that would be a two hour session and would of worn Michelle out.So to kill two birds, we went to the garden centre and nipped in my mums on the way back.

After 1/2 hour interrogation she was tired and ready for home!She gets on really well with the lady that owns the garden centre and they both shed a tear when they met,she couldnt believe her weight loss.Michelle wanted to wear a jacket because she was paranoid about her weight, but I told her its nothing tobe ashamed of.I cant believe how much shes eaten today, but her belly is swelling up more.Looked on the Internet as its called Ascites and a sign of cancer but didnt want to look too far.Im hoping she can start treatment so she doesnt have to drain it again.Looking forward to seeing the Macmillan nurse next week, although Ill miss her as Im working.Ever since the weekend in Sheffield when I first started to notice her weight loss Ive been taking photos ofMichelle, even in hospital.

I suppose it sounds weird when you write it down but Ive got a vision of putting the photos to CD withmusic and later on looking back what weve been through as well as reading this blog.More plants to water now as Michelle watches her Sky+ programmes.Then early bed for me as Ill be up at 4am again ready for work.

Visit When Shes Better! (2009-06-15 17:00)

Early finish at work today so managed to pick up a DLA form and start the process of filling it out, hopingthe Macmillan Nurse will able to help with that.

It still amazes me that Michelles work friends phone up and when I say that she doesnt want to see anyoneright now they respond with: Ill call back next week when shes feeling a bit betterLike in 7 days time shell be on top of the world and made a full recovery!My mum phoned today to say that when we went down yesterday my little niece saw Michelle and said thatshe looked really thin.My mum explained that shed got cancer, and her reply was Were doing that at schoolSometimes I get lost for words.................

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have a box on the wall.As shes sat there thinking she suddenly decides that she does want a letter box after all.So she says she going across the road to see Mick and tell him so he can cut one one for the morning.Three hours and a couple of glasses of wine later she comes back but Ive fallen asleep.Someones gone out and locked all the doors.So after 1/2 hour of banging on the door and throwing stones at the window I woke up, much to theamusement of the neighbours!She said to me that she really really enjoyed herself because they were all having a laugh and drink and notalk of being ill or hospitals, she had a big smile on her face.

Cigarettes And Tears (2009-06-20 09:48)

Sunday 24TH May 2009 was the last time Michelle smoked a cigarette, on the way into hospital.Shes smoked since she was 14 and shes now 47 so to get this far without one is a big step and Im so proudof her.She does find it very difficult some days and finds herself watching TV programmes and notices the people

that are smoking.She decided on the day of diagnosis that she wouldnt smoke again but she woke up this morning with reallybad cravings.She wanted me to buy her 10 cigarettes from the shop and keep them and give her one a day, but I know ifshe has one a day then itll be 3....4....10.She had a good old cry and I tried to take her mind of things by talking about her garden.So were off to her favourite garden centre today to get another bush, so that means more digging for me :(I know there is a long battle ahead, and reading Manda & Petes blog today Im not looking forward to theChemo because Petes having a bad few days.But I am so proud of her and what she has put up with so far.

Long 1ST Day Of Treatment (2009-06-23 16:45)

This was Michelles first day of treatment so took the day off work as holiday ( 9 days left now)We got to Oncology at 9.15am and the saw a lovely man called DR. Kennedy, he explained everything onour level and made it all so clear, hes the specialist thats treating Michelles Lymphoma.Being as you need good liver function for chemo to work she needs the Lymph node that is pressing on herkidney to be shrunk down so her kidney function is good because right now the lymph node is blocking oneof her kidneys.The drug is called Rituximab and its a Monoclonal Antibody, basically it hits a specific part of the Lym-

phoma and encourages the body to fight the cancer cells too.We then went upstairs to the day ward and the staff we so nice, and funny.Michelle was seen by a male nurse, David who first put the cannula in.She said to him I cant look when you put the needle inTo which he replied Im the same, as soon as Im about the hit the vein I close my eyes as well!All was going well until they sped the drip up for the third time, then she complained of a sore throat. Wedbeen warned about flu like symptoms from DR. Kennedy so I just told her to have a cold drink.Then her throat became like sand paper, so I told the nurse.As she was coming over Michelles face went bright red and she was gasping for breath and her eyes rollingback.

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The nurse was brilliant and gave her 3 injections and turned the drip off, apparently it is a very commonside affect, although scary.After 1/2 hour all was well and the drip was switched back on, and we eventually got out around 5.30pm soa long day.We were both tired when we got home, although I hadnt done anything but we were both pleased that atleast treatment is underway now.Today were both at the top of the roller coaster and its a nice day whilst it lasts.Check up on Wednesday and then back for session two next Monday.

Up And Not Out (2009-06-24 17:47)

So another visit to Oncology today for a check up with DR. Symonds.Straight forward we thought, but it never is that way and were getting used to that now.He wanted to do and X-Ray to pin point the cervical cancer so he could plan radiotherapy,but Michelles stomach is distended again so any X-Ray wouldnt work correctly.So after blood tests, hes booked her in for tomorrow to have the fluid drained again.

This got her down but I tried to make her positive by saying that at least itll be out of the way by tea time.So shes off there for 9am with Kay( who is a star ) for a full days session, shes dreading it but the nursereassured her it wont be as bad as last time.Ill be at work again, and I hate that when I cant be there for her, but what can you do.......win the lottery!Then back next Monday for 2ND treatment & Wednesday for check up.

Another 5 Liters (2009-06-25 17:16)

Michelle went in the LRI today to have her stomach drained for a second time.

She had wound herself up again but admitted it wasnt half as bad as last time.Another 5 liters this time they drained away, and shes so glad its over.She got home around 4pm and started on the crisps and chocolate, Ive never seen her each as much in allthe time Ive know her!Im pleased to see her with a good appetite though, as shes putting a little more weight on each day.So not much else to report, just looking forward to treatment number two on Monday now.Onwards and upwards on our journey.

Too Much Time To Think (2009-06-27 16:29)

Well our Mac nurse came Friday, Belinda.We wasnt sure what to expect and I arrived half way through her visit because of work.She filled out our DLA forms and said it shouldnt take long to sort out.Shed be having a chat with Michelle about treatments and how she was feelings before I got there.I was delivering around Matlock & Ashbourne today, and dont know whether I went off into a day dreambut sometimes when Im driving around I have too much time to think.One Minuit Ill be headed towards that dark place and another looking forward to the future.But today I was just watching couples, whether it was at traffic lights or just walking along.Alot were just walking side by side and not even talking to each other and it just made me think how we all

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take so many things for granted.Like youll wake up the next day and everything will be the same, yet when your faced with this awful illnessit makes you realize what we take for granted.Dont get us wrong were not on the feeling sorry for ourselves trip, just if only people could see what theyhave and how they think it will always be the same.Enough of my deep waffle for now, Michelle needs more food!

2ND Treatment Goes Like A Treat (2009-06-29 16:10)

Michelles 2ND dose of Rituximab today, Kay picked her up and off they went.I text Kay ( Michelles sister-in -law ) a few times from work to make sure shes OK.And all went well this time, no side affects and quicker than last time.Shes tired now because she never really sleeps the night before the treatment, so shes gone for a lay downI came home and was so so hot, did all my house work and jumped in a cold shower, oh so so nice..So thats us half way through her first treatment, things seem to be flying now.27oC and due to get hotter!

Manda and Pete (2009-06-30 23:42:40)

Thats great news!!!!!!!! Ive been having problems with accessing the site and e-mails so really pleased to be able to

read your blog and see that things seems to be going OK (well, as OK as they can). Things are picking up this end

too thank good ness - there is always light at the end of the tunnel! Havent heard how Andy and Emma are getting

on - have you?

Take care - and enjoy the summer!! Why do us Brits complain when its too hot and complain when its too cold he

he he he

Manda ( & Pete) x

1.2 July

Still On The Up (2009-07-02 16:26)

So Wednesday 1ST July 2009 and its off to Leicester for ANOTHER check up with Dr Symonds.He was very pleased with Michelle today, said her stomach looked fine after draining, she looked alot betterthan last week and time to do a scan to plan radiotherapy.Everything seems like its moving so fast now, x-ray taken for radio planning and explained how the machineworked and what would happen.So after finishing the two weeks of retuximab, hell the start Radio straight away, Mon-Fri for 5 weeks (Takes about 1/2 hour a day ) and one nights stay for an internal radio ( but you dont want to know howthat works! ) then onto Chemo.Looking back only maybe two weeks and things felt like they were at a stand still but we are both so happy,and apprehensive about our next stage of treatment.Were still at the top of the roller coaster and enjoying it, but know what goes up must come down and welldeal with that when it happens.For now were both happy and been having a laugh in the lovely summer sun, a summer to remember for allsorts of reasons!

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Weekend Parole (2009-07-03 19:08)

Michelle still feeling great and wants to go out for a meal over the weekend.Oh Yes! getting out at the weekend may sound so normal!but when you havent been out for weeks its so good to look forward to.( Like weekend parole)As Ive said before its amazing how many things we took for granted and now getting excited about a meal.I wonder how long this UP will last?Emailed Manda & Pete and theyve got a week off the treatment, so all good there.Havent heard from Andy & Emma, hope they are both OK as Emmas going through her Chemo right now.Nothing else to report and its the weekend...................

Race For Life (2009-07-07 18:23)

Such a busy weekend I havent had time to update our blog.On Saturday Michelle was having a great day, so we went into Leicester as she wanted to get some newclothes.She got tired very quickly, so got what she wanted and headed home, but on the way home she fancied acold drink and sandwich in the pub beer garden.So we stopped at the Bulls Head and it was so nice, I was looking at her like there was nothing wrong withher.After that we decided to pay a surprise visit to her mums, and she was so pleased and surprised to seeMichelle.She had a good old natter, but again felt tired so we headed home.But on the way home Michelle wanted to visit her favourite garden centre, its only small at the back of aladies house, and as Ive said before Michelle gets on really well with the owner.Previously Id given the lady some money as shes doing Cancer Researchs Race For Life on July 15th inCoventry.

She said that all the ladies in the race put a name on their vest numbers to show who they are running for,and she asked if it was OK to put Michelles name on her vest.We were both so chuffed and thought that it was such a nice thought, and Michelle was on a high for therest of the day.On Sunday, another good day and we decided to go to Donington market but she didnt think shed able towalk even past the first aisle.So I suggested my mums wheelchair, she was a bit weary at first but said yes.As we I pushed her she said it was so relaxing and was falling asleep!But the most annoying thing was, the people staring at her like she was a leaper.At least we both enjoying ourselves and I was so proud of her for making the effort.Monday saw week three of retuximab treatment.

When Michelle and Kay arrived her notes or treatment were on the ward, so didnt start until about 11am,and all went great and she was home for 2.30pmAgain made her tired so after more food she had a little sleep.Its now Tuesday and just found time to do our blog update.Work DONE.Shopping DONE.House work DONE.Weve had so many letters too over the last two days and shes got abit confused and panicking about whoshes seeing next.Ive wrote it all down for her and its appointment after appointment over the next three weeks.

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Dont think Ill leave the blog this late to update again, like to do it day by day but with going out didntreally have time.

Getting Bored Of TV (2009-07-08 15:22)

No hospital check up today for a change, we usually see DR. Simons on a Wednesday but day off today.I still finished work early but felt a little rubbish myself today.We had planned to go out for a pub lunch but I didnt really feel like it.I feel guilty now because Michelle really fancied going and now shes a bit quiet.We had a chat and shes getting bored of staying in and watching TV, must be so frustrating because shewas always on the go and never stopped.Ive now suggested going on Saturday, so thats something to look forward to.Just hoping for a good weekend, health and weather wise.

A Few Tears and Its The Weekend (2009-07-10 17:23)

I missed out on updating yesterday so here now to fill everyone in.Yesterday was quite weird, Michelle phoned me as I was about to go into Morrisons to tell me that shedheard about her claim for DLA and said it had all gone through.She said that she wants to get a car with it and that it will be her present to me for looking after her.I had to walk back to the car because I felt the tears on the way, and its been a few weeks now since Ivecried.I did the shopping and got back home, walked into the kitchen and burst out crying.Michelle gave me a hug and I told her Id rather have no money and no car if we could turn the clock backand all would be OK.

I explained that I didnt need presents or payments for looking after her, she then burst into tears.So there we were in the kitchen hugging and crying.She said that its what she wanted to do and a car would be something for her to look forward too as shegoes through her treatment.So after work today ( Friday ) I took her a ride to the garages and she loves the new Ford Fiesta, but I wasjust thinking Im in a garage to see about a car for my now registered disabled wife, and at our age weshouldnt beEnough of our tears and sorrow for now though because its the start of the weekend, and she feels like goingout again.Shes still worried about her hair falling out so Ive secretly booked her in for a trim in the morning so shecan enjoy it while she can.

All Good Today (2009-07-11 20:33)

I cant believe that a few weeks back we were both sat in all weekend as Michelle was so tired all the time.Today we went shopping for Pokemon presents as were off to see Christopher on Sunday for his birthdayand Kay is cooking a curry ( Yummy! )I took Michelle to The Bulls Head for lunch but forgot to tell her Id booked her in for her hair, so lunchwas a little rushed!

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She loved having her hair done and Claire said that next time shed come to the house, and if she did loseher hair shes sort it out shorter.Michelle watching TV, I had a first and chatting to my Virtual friend ( oh you know! )And we put the world of cancer to rights and learnt alot from each other.Now time for a lay down myself but bet I cant get on the sofa, Michelle will be hogging that watching.......Big Brother, Britains Got Talent, X Factor, USA Got Talent, ............need I go on! LOL

Birthday Party & Next Treatment (2009-07-13 17:16)

Sunday we both went over to Tracy & Kays for Christophers 8TH birthday party.Lovely food and weather made it a great day, although Michelle got tired half way through and had to havea lay down.We went home about 6pm and she was better relaxing laying down but so nice to get out the house again.Monday 13TH July saw Kay take Michelle for her last treatment of Retuximab and record time of about 4hours to go through and all went well.They had to wait then to see a nurse to discuss further treatment and thats when the shock came.She starts Radio on 27TH July Mon-Fri for five weeks, which we expected.But on Wednesday 29TH July she also starts chemo at the same time!A drug called Cisplatin, which I need to look up about, and thats every Wednesday for 6 weeks.My biggest worry now is how is Michelle going to manage Mon-Fri Radio when shes had her chemo?Its all moving so fast now, and Linda the lymphoma nurse said she may also need a lymph node biopsy tocheck her Lymphoma is still low grade.So much to take in for today and think I might now have to start booking some days off work.

Manda and Pete (2009-07-13 19:04:37)

wow - thats great news! I know things may sound scary, but combined radio and chemo is best (well I think it isanyway from what Ive read). Its a double-blast so thats got to be good to get rid of the little gremlins. Looks like

you might have to get that lemonade in sooner that you thought! Dont forget some chemo drugs have very little side

effects - and at least it is only 6 weekly. I think its fab news!

Manda ( & Pete) x

Manda and Pete (2009-07-13 19:06:57)

oops sorry. Just re-read your blog and realised its once every week for 6 weeks. Still fab news though!

Calm Before The Storm (2009-07-16 18:22)

Not a lot to report all week really, up to now.And next week will be quiet, except Wednesday when its a full day of tests and consultants.This is the calm before the storm I think because the week after that will be all go!And with help from my cyber friend Ive got a list of shopping to do that will help with some of the sideaffects.Just more waiting now, and thats always been the worst bit...................waiting.

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Life Not What It Used To Be (2009-07-17 15:45)

Its Friday and the weekend is about to start.When we were younger that was it, here we go Friday night.Now it seems like any other day, just that I havent got to go to work.Dont get me wrong, its not a dark day just a look back to what we used to do before Michelles illness andmaybe Im feeling a little sorry for myself!If only we all had that time machine, but wed only want to go back a couple of months and then realisehow lucky we were then.Dont think all the rain and weather helps, and everyone feels better when its sunny........thats my moaningdone for the day!I must be bored because Ive changed the blog layout and profile pic of Michelle eating AGAIN!( but I loveher to bits)Not much to report either just waiting, and youll all know how we love that!

(2009-07-19 08:48)

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Our roller coaster ride was a bit jittery over the weekend.Saturday Michelle got a little down, thinking too much and talk of giving up smoking didnt help.She slipped last week and had some cigarettes, which I wasnt happy about.So Monday shell calling the GP to see if he can give her some patchs or something to help.After a good chat we decided to get out of the house, while we can.So off to The Bulls Head for a drink, and got there too late to eat as theyd stopped serving.So back home for a Chinese!Michelles uncle Des from Cambridge phoned to say his son & wife had a little baby boy, and sent a photo.He & Christine were over the moon, grand parents for the first time.Over the weekend I had a mad idea for a charity calender based on the What Now website I use to keepsane.

Everyone seemed to think it was a good idea, and hopefully it will be a success and raise lots of money.Ive emailed Admin & the press office from the site and am waiting to hear from them.

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Monday Again! (2009-07-20 16:01)

Its Monday again, where does the weekend go? I think we should work 2 days and have 5 days off!DR. Lewis came to see Michelle today about giving up smoking.

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Hes told her hell put her Zyban, a tablet that helps to stop smoking, buy not whilst shes having chemo.Hes given her a prescription for 2 weeks off patchs to start after chemo, then hell bring the tablets to thehouse.As our GP he has been absolutel

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