Our Fair City Season One p. 1 - Amazon S3Fair+City+Season+One+Transcri… · Our Fair City Season One p. 3 ... The damp and glistening streets of level zero lie at the heart of our

Our Fair City Season One p. 1

Episode Credits

Written by Clayton Faits, with Ansel Burch, Jim McDoniel, Frank Sjodin. Directed by Jeffrey Gardner. Sound Design by Ryan Schile. Music by Stephen Poon. Episode art by Robin Billadeau. Produced by David Rheinstrom. Production Management by Betsey Palmer. Created by Clayton Faits.

Episode Cast

The Narrator— Ansel Burch Nathan Rourke— Clayton Faits Jack— Mark Soloff Neal Henderson— Sebastian H. Orr Old Lady— Lauren Faits Alison Dalton— Nina O’Keefe Elizabeth Rourke— Tara Schile Andrew Snidge— Frank Sjodin Clay— Tyler Samples Sandy— Abby Doud Peat— Jared Latore MolePerson Overseer— Jeffrey Gardner Vice President Davenport— Ben Aldred Special Agent George Chamberlain— Jim McDoniel Doctor Emily Caligari— Marsha Harman The Professor— Ginneh Jolan The Dean— Jim McDoniel The TA— Mark Soloff Doctor Herbert West— Ryan Schile The Voice of HartLife— Jeffrey Gardner PRESHOW- TIME MARKER 00:00

JEFFREY GARDNER Loyal Policies, welcome to Our Fair City. My name is Jeffrey Gardner- I’m HartLife’s Executive Producer. What you are about to hear is Season One of Our Fair City in its entirety, remastered and rerecorded as a single episode. Later seasons will have a different format: 10 to 20 shorter episodes, usually about 10-20 minutes in length. So, with no further ado, we hope you enjoy Season One of Our Fair City, and as always...we’ll see you in the tunnels. TIME MARKER: 00:39

SFX:Our Fair City Theme music plays


NARRATOR

Tonight's special broadcast is brought to you by the company you depend upon for all of your greatest needs, HartLife. These stories are true dramatizations from our fair city's glorious history. So listen and remember: HartLife, all the life you'll ever need.

SFX: Sound of wind blowing underneath. Mournful Piano plays.

Out here in the ruins of Old New England, you don’t calculate your chances of survival - you have none. A bitter wind tears across the tundra, friendless and spiteful, until it breaks against the side of a monolithic structure. The HartLife Tower is the only building for miles, erupting out of the snow and stretching impossibly high towards the iron-grey underbellies of the dark clouds overhead.

SFX: The sound of a young person shivering.

To Nathan Rourke, lying at the base of the mighty structure, the wind whispers death. He lies face-down in the snow, clutching a tattered book. Blood from his leg has melted into the snow, carving a deep, red ravine. He is alone.

SFX: The squealing hinge and metallic clang of a hatch opening pierces the sound of the wind. Heavy footsteps in the snow.

But not for long. A nearby hatch swings open and a figure emerges. His long coat, heavy boots, and thick scarf trailing behind him in the wind mark him as a worker on the Lightning Rigs, one of those bold or foolish enough to brave the stormy skies above this frozen valley to gather lightning for the city. His name...is Jack Sjovebukser.

NATHAN (weakly) Nice of you to come. Can I get you something? Some snow perhaps? Or maybe you’d care for some of my blood.

JACK Nice. Now shut up and get your ass inside.

SFX: Sound of clothes moving, the wind grows quiet and ceases as a second clang marks the hatch closing. A lightswitch. Rattling footsteps on metal grating.

NARRATOR

Nathan is too weak to move. Jack takes him by the front of his shirt and hauls him inside. They move slowly through a long tunnel, down into the hive of narrow passages and nooks that make up the city for the unwashed masses. Above ground, privileged corporate executives live and work in well-lit offices with soft carpeting and bathrooms tiled in warm stone, while the likes of


Jack and Nathan hunch in damp, oil-stained passages and shiver with cold.

JACK Does this hurt?

NATHAN Ahh! Yes it hurts.

JACK What about this?

NATHAN Ow!

JACK Yeah?

NATHAN Yeah, cut it out!

JACK Okay. Hold still a minute.

SFX: a pause in their footsteps. NATHAN What are youAAAUGH!

SFX: A sharp crack, and Nathan screams in pain. Panting.

JACK Your leg’s gonna be fine. You’re welcome. NATHAN Warn me when you’re gonna do that! JACK (not unkindly) Ah, come on, it’s just a broken leg. How bad can it be?

SFX: Their footsteps resume, more quickly now.

NARRATOR Nathan leans on Jack’s shoulder as he limps down the hall. In the central areas, doors and alcoves are numbered but out here things are less...official. Jack leads them through the twisting corridors and through doorways warped by years of settling earth and changing geology.


NATHAN I’m lost. JACK That’s the idea. Lucky Strike’s orders. This way, no one can follow us.

SFX: We hear metal twisting under pressure

And they’d have to be crazy to try. This far out, the tunnels aren’t very stable.

SFX: An eerie chittering sound joins in. And if a cave-in doesn’t get you, there are…other dangers. If you believe in that sort of thing. (a pregnant pause) Here we are.

SFX: The beeps of a door opening, footsteps as they enter.

NATHAN Alright, shut the door dammit. I got the creeps. JACK Better that than the reverse. Right? Right?

SFX: Sound of a door clicking shut and locking.

Now, lemme see it.

SFX: Rumaging in a backpack. Nathan pulls out a book.

NATHAN I hope this was worth it. JACK It was worth it if we say it was worth it! NATHAN I bet Lucky didn’t even tell you what it is.


JACK It’s a book.

NATHAN What kind of book?

JACK ...I don’t like you.

NATHAN It’s a nursing textbook. JACK Have you ever considered that a little medical knowledge might be of use in our line of work? NATHAN (sullen) Why don’t you just go to a doctor? JACK Why don’t you? What are you going to put down on your workplace accident form, huh? NATHAN Point.

SFX: NATHAN winces. Sound of pages turning as LUCKY leafs through the book.

JACK

Alright. I’ll give you something for the pain. Let’s see what I got…

SFX: JACK rifles through some pill bottles. I’m going to bandage you up, now. TIME MARKER: 5:00

JACK Hey, you hear that Lucky got struck again? You believe that?

NATHAN No.

JACK ‘Strue. That makes three. I swear, nothing will kill that man...

SFX: NATHAN and JACK fade out under NARRATOR. Whimsical plucked strings


and percussion fade in under the narrator. NARRATOR Let us leave young Nathan and his dubious mentor while they are yet warm and safe - for they will not be so for long - to journey up above the twisted and neglected warrens of Jack Sjovebukser’s hideout, past tons of earth and stone, past the great pipes of steel and ducts of aluminum which deliver our air and our water, and into the bosom of HartLife. Here it is warm, safe...and grand.

SFX: Rumbling train wheels and a crackling voice announcing “Doors Opening” herald the arrival of a People Mover Train.

The damp and glistening streets of level zero lie at the heart of our fair city, beneath the great Vaulted Foundation of the Tower itself. The doors of a People Mover Train squeak open half-way, and then stop there.

SFX: Grunts of exertion, and protesting metal as the door is heaved open.

A titanic pair of hands emerges from the gap, and force the doors open. These are the hands of a man known to all Policies of our great Company. Known to you, dear listener...as Neal Henderson.

SFX: Neal Henderson dusts off his hands.

NEAL There y'go, ma'am.

OLD LADY Thank you, son. Want some advice from an old woman?

NEAL Of course!

OLD LADY Take a bath.

NEAL Aw.

SFX: The old lady scampers away.

NARRATOR


Neal Henderson cannot help his smell; he is a Putrescible Waste Collector - one of the best. He's come straight from work. He takes long strides in spite of his nervousness.

SFX: Heavy footsteps as Neal works his way through the crowd.

Other policies give him a wide berth as he heads for the gleaming elevators on the Concourse Level, and it's not just because of his smell. A long-handled shovel glints on his back. His shoulders are broad and strong. The great man makes his way to a familiar doorway.

SFX: Tinkling of a glass bead curtain. He smiles at the beaded curtain which hangs there. Inside, there is common room where some of HartLife’s own Relations Technicians wait to provide that essential service which, like all good things, comes to us from HartLife itself: Human contact.

NEAL Alison? Alison, you won’t believe what happened. This is the big one, it’s going to change everything for us!

SFX: Kissing sounds cut off with a noise of surprise.

ALISON Neal! I’m sorry, I’m working. I won’t be long.

NEAL

It can’t wait, it’s too good.

MUFFLED MAN Ehem.

NEAL You just...carry on, there, friend.

MUFFLED MAN I, uh…

ALISON Neal…

NEAL What? I really don’t mind. It’s good news! I’m not going back to the fields.

ALISON Why don’t you step down down the hall...someone else will be with you shortly.


MUFFLED MAN (mumbles assent)

SFX: The man patron leaves.

ALISON So. You’re not going back to the fields.

NEAL No! And neither are you! Well, I mean, that is, you never did go down to the fields, but if you did, you wouldn’t anymore.

ALISON And where’ll you live, huh? Here?

SFX: neal pulls out a bag.

NEAL No, I’m going to get my own place. A big place! And Ali...I want you to live with me.

ALISON Neal, calm down. What is going on.

NEAL I found something. In the fields. Here, look.

SFX: Neal pulls out the Containment Tube. It thrums powerfully.

ALISON

It’s great. What is it?

NEAL It’s a tube!

ALISON I can see that.

NEAL It’s special.

ALISON That I don’t see.

NEAL No, see here, look - it’s lit up green here. And it beeps every hour.

ALISON


Neat.

NEAL It’s valuable.

ALISON To who?

NEAL The company. Two suits came down to the fields looking for it.

ALISON And you didn’t return it to them? Neal, they’ll find out!

NEAL No. I’m done with HartLife.

ALISON Neal!

NEAL

I mean it! If they can’t spare a handful of nitrogen canisters to keep my whole crew alive, I don’t see as how I owe them squat. If they want this, they can buy it off me.

SFX: He shifts the bag.

ALISON They’ll take it off your corpse first.

NEAL Then I’ll sell it to someone else! Do you have any idea how valuable this tube is?

ALISON No, and you don’t either! It’s probably dangerous.

NEAL What’s it gonna do, give me superpowers?

ALISON This isn’t a joke. You need to turn it in.

NEAL But Ali-

ALISON Don’t you “Ali” me. It goes straight to StreetSafe.


SFX: Neal crosses towards her.

NEAL I...okay. I just thought that this this’d be my chance to carve out a little something to call my own, not spend the rest of my life shoveling dookie for the company. It’s silly. I thought I could make you proud of me.

ALISON Tell me.

NEAL What?

ALISON Tell me you’re going to do it.

NEAL I am? I am! I’m going to sell this...this whatsit, and I’m going to make a life for myself.

ALISON And?

NEAL And we’re going to share that life together, and you’re going to be proud of me! TIME MARKER: 10:03

ALISON You’re damn right!

NEAL I’m gonna walk right out of here and find someone to sell this thing to!

ALISON ...You don’t have a buyer lined up?

NEAL I figured I’d just ask around.

ALISON “Hey, I’ve got this contraband...thing...do you want to buy it?”

NEAL Yeah, did you hear me practicing my line?

ALISON You need my help.


NEAL

I’m a little out of my depth, yes.

ALISON Fine. First we need to figure out what this thing is...and I know who can help. First thing tomorrow, you’re going to go…

ALISON fades out under the NARRATOR. Somewhat disconcerting piano music fades in.

NARRATOR

And so Alison and Neal sit down on the floor together, she talking of practicalities and the dangers of selling company property illegally, and he of a sweet life they might share. Many sweet nothings were exchanged that evening, and we shall leave what was said between the two of them and the subtle microphones which record all that is said and done in Our Fair City. They talked far into the night, into the silent hours when most every Policy in the City slumbers...but when you and I go to bed, dear listener, there are some in the City who are just reporting to work. Deep in the bowels of the underground city, inhuman shadows shuffle forward, one after another, converging on the mammoth cave that serves as the “morning” meeting place of the Molepeople. Each fur covered creature lurches forward to find that, yes, thank God, there is coffee.

SFX: MolePerson footsteps shuffle forward, under an assortment of mutters.

OVERSEER

(the overseer’s lines are over a loudspeaker) Alright youse moles, come and get your assignments, hot off the faxes.

SFX: There are a few brief mutters of fake enthusiasm.

I said move it, pups! You waiting for these caves to carve themselves?

SFX: Moles start walking. Dig team five. The A-level tubes are getting congested. The Department of Transportation and Walking wants a bypass by the end of the day. And enough with tunnel-shaping nonsense. We don’t need anymore badger-shaped junctions. A simple cloverleaf will do.

SFX: Dig team five walk away grumbling: “You’re no fun.” Something about “artistic expression” and “What’s a cloverleaf?”

Peat! Shaft 17 has collapsed again. I want your team to grab a durium support and head down there.


PEAT

But ...

OVERSEER I know, we aren’t supposed to use the durium supports except by special order, but I’m sick of dealing with Shaft 17. Just keep it quiet and get it done.

SFX: Peat and his team walk away. The overseer puts down the loudspeaker.

Sandy. Clay. A word.

SFX: The tunnel noise fades away as the other moles empty out.

OVERSEER

I’ve got another patch job for you both. Level 26, the end of Gari Circle.

SANDY Isn’t that…

OVERSEER A residence, yeah. I need you to be discreet. Get in, fix the hole, get out. Alright? Dismissed.

SFX: Footsteps as Clay and Sandy walk away.

CLAY

This is a bit weird isn’t it?

SANDY How do you mean?

CLAY Well, this is the fifth patch job we’ve been sent on this month.

SFX: Footsteps stop. Sound of a button being pushed.

Just seems like a lot, is all. SFX: The door dings.

ELEVATOR Doors opening.


SFX: Sound of footsteps and doors closing. A button is pushed.

Doors closing.

SFX: Whooshing elevator sound.

SANDY I take it you haven’t heard.

CLAY Heard what?

SANDY What the others are saying? About the holes?

CLAY No, what?

SANDY Ant people.

(Silence.)

CLAY (skeptically)

Ant people?

SANDY

Yeah.

CLAY And you believe that?

SANDY That’s what Ol’ Silty said.

CLAY Ol’ Silty believes in a promised land of earthworms and honey.

SANDY Peat believes him.

CLAY You talked to Peat about this?

SANDY Well, it came up during dinner.

(Short silence.)


CLAY

Dinner as in…just dinner or dinner as in…like…a date?

SANDY Why does it matter?

CLAY (too quickly)

It doesn’t.

SFX: The door dings.

ELEVATOR Level 26. Doors opening.

SFX: Sound of door opening and footsteps.

Doors closing.

CLAY

So, what does Peat have to say?

SANDY Just that strange things have been going on down in the expansion tunnels. Noises from the other side of rock walls. Scraping, digging, chittering. And then there’s Shaft 17.

CLAY What about it?

SFX: Clay and Sandy stop walking.

SANDY It keeps collapsing for no reason. Supports are new, structure’s sound, but we can’t keep it open for more than a few weeks at a time. All this from a tunnel we didn’t dig.

CLAY We find caves all the time.

SFX: Nervously, they begin walking again.

SANDY Caves that conveniently go straight down to underground heat sources. Caves that line up perfectly with a number of other existing structures we also use.

CLAY Caves usually connect, hence the plural, caves.


SANDY What about the antenna Silty found?

CLAY You mean the rock?

SANDY

It looks like an antenna.

CLAY It also looks like a rock.

(Pause) Okay, fine. Maybe you’re right. Maybe, there’s a chance that deep in some forgotten part of the earth, there might be ant people.

(Pause) ...led by Hotfoot and his army of dirt serpents and Abominable Magmen. No. I’m sorry. I can’t. It’s ridiculous. They don’t exist. There is no such thing as ant people. TIME MARKER; 15:14

SFX: Footsteps stop. Sound of door knocking.

CLAY and SANDY

(shouting) Molepeople.

SFX: The door creaks opens slightly. CLAY Hello?

SFX: Sound of a gun cocking. Sandy! Look out!

SFX: Clay tackles Sandy to the ground. They both scream as there is gunfire. Lots of gunfire.

CLAY Are...are you okay? SANDY Yeah. What was that?

SFX: Footsteps as Chamberlain approaches.


CHAMBERLAIN

Oh. Moles. Well, come in. SFX: Sound of footsteps as they walk inside.

SANDY

Oh my...

SFX: Sound of retching.

CLAY Is that an arm?

CHAMBERLAIN Is she almost done?

SFX: The retching stops. Good. The hole’s over there. Try not to get in the way.

CLAY Uh...yes sir.

SFX: Sound of a tape recorder, recording.

CHAMBERLAIN Initial investigation into the disturbance at 999 Gari Circle by Agent George Chamberlain. Entry to the domicile was made via previously unknown tunnel leading up to the living room. Perpetrators broke through the wall, creating a circular opening……eight feet in diameter. The Hopkins were at home at the time of the incident.

SFX: Rummaging through scraps and wrappers.

Scraps of wicker basket, a torn blanket, and algae bar wrappers indicate evidence of a picnic. The algae rations themselves are missing, presumed taken by the assailants. The significance of this is not yet known. At least one of the Hopkins appears to have been killed in the attack...

SFX: Sound of recorder stopping. Sniffing sounds, followed by tasting sound. Recorder starts again.

…Estrogen levels in blood at the scene suggest the wife. Remains consist of one arm discarded behind the ottoman... SANDY (Gulp.)


CHAMBERLAIN ...the rest again taken by the assailants. Writing on the wall, “There is only one Queen.” …a reference to the fact that Mrs. Hopkins was newly pregnant. Note: the Hopkins did not receive reproductive permission. Investigator recommends a posthumous fine. Everything made of glass has been shattered.

SFX: Brushes away shattered glass.

Every mirror, every window, anything that reflects or…magnifies. The significance of this is not yet known. Perpetrators exited back out their tunnel taking the Hopkins with them. Scratch marks and remains of fingernails imply that Mr. Hopkins was still alive when they took him away. The significance of this...

CLAY Um…Mr…uh….sir.

SFX: Chamberlain turns off the recorder again as he examines the hole.

I found this in the hole.

CHAMBERLAIN It’s a rock.

SANDY It kind of looks like an….

CHAMBERLAIN (Interrupting.)

It also looks like a rock.

SANDY (Under her breath.)

Then why are you keeping it?

SFX: Chamberlain turns on the recorder. CHAMBERLAIN In conclusion, the record should show that Mr. Hopkins killed his wife for having an affair. He died trying to evade StreetSafe agents. Both bodies were disposed of in the usual way.

SFX: He turns the recorder off and pockets it.

Finish up. There are new tenants ready to move in.


SFX: Sound of footsteps fade away. Strange chittering sound.

CLAY

(Fearful whispering.) What was that?

SANDY (Fearful whispering.)

You know, ants can lift ten times their own body weight.

CLAY Why don’t we dig a little faster?

SFX: They hurridly dig.

NARRATOR

Remember, dear listener: do not feed the moles. As Sandy and Clay complete their night’s work, Nathan Rourke makes his way through the city to his home. He creeps carefully...quietly through the small apartment he shares with his mother…

SFX: NATHAN bumps into a table. Something shatters.

ELIZABETH

I heard that.

NATHAN Sorry, mom-

ELIZABETH

Just go to bed, we’ll talk about it in the morning.

NARRATOR And so he does. When finally wakes hours later, he keeps his eyes shut, not ready yet to face his mother’s ire.

ELIZABETH Good afternoon, sleepy-head. I know you’re up, your eyes moved.

NATHAN Mph.

ELIZABETH I was starting to think you’d become nocturnal and I’d given birth to a moleman. NATHAN Mmph.


ELIZABETH I saved a breakfast-pill for you. They had blueberry-muffin-flavor this time. NATHAN Mmmph. ELIZABETH You've got to eat, Nathan. NATHAN Mmph.

(gulps down pill)

SFX: Nathan struggles out of bed. He shifts, finally gets upright, and trips, hurting himself again. Steadying himself, he slowly walks across the apartment, as the sounds of water fade in.

TIME MARKER: 20:08 ELIZABETH So. Late night. NATHAN Mmph. ELIZABETH You could have sent a wire to let me know where you were. You know I worry. NATHAN I was hanging out with Ed, ma.

ELIZABETH I heard he got that job with Forms and Files.

NATHAN

Mom.

ELIZABETH I'm just saying, he deserves it. He played by the rules.

NATHAN Don’t start.

ELIZABETH You've got to learn to jump through the hoops to get ahead. If you don't find a job soon they'll send you to the putrescible waste fields for the rest of your life.


NATHAN

It's not a job it's a punishment.

ELIZABETH You've got to do something with your life.

NATHAN I passed every exam-

ELIZABETH Not every exam.

NATHAN The Identity Variance test is unfair!

ELIZABETH Who said life was fair? You always make things so hard on yourself.

SFX: Nathan kicks back his chair, preparing to storm out.

NATHAN

I'm headed out.

ELIZABETH Where?

NATHAN Out.

SFX: Elizabeth catches him- she is strong and fast.

ELIZABETH I don’t think so. You’re not going anywhere unless you’re bringing your employment card with you. You’re weeks overdue, if you don’t find an assignment then they’ll find one for you.

NATHAN I have it.

ELIZABETH You think I’m stupid.

SFX: She lets him go.

NATHAN No, mom-

ELIZABETH


You think I’m just your stupid mother with her stupid corporate job, but I wasn’t always just a security guard. I don’t like the kind of people you hang around with.

NATHAN I know what I’m doing.

ELIZABETH You have no idea what you’re doing. You’re walking with a limp. Did you think I wouldn’t notice? Whatever you’re into, it’s bad enough that you want to hide it from me and dangerous enough that you’re getting hurt doing it. And if your stupid mother can figure that out, how much do you think the Corporate Compliance Department knows about you?

NATHAN (at a loss)

Uh.

ELIZABETH You’re mad at the company, and you want to change the world. I get it. I do! I felt that way when I was your age. And your father felt that way. If he were here, he’d tell you it’s not worth it. You keep on like this, and you’re going to end up like him.

NATHAN I won’t. I promise.

SFX: Nathan crosses the room and opens the door.

ELIZABETH

You need HartLife a lot more than HartLife needs you. Life will be a whole lot easier if you just accept that and play by their rules.

NATHAN I’ll be careful.

SFX: NATHAN slams the door.

ELIZABETH You’ll be dead.

NARRATOR And so, sullen and sleep-deprived as teenagers have been throughout history, Nathan walks to that public service so essential to the Policies of HartLife, his local People Mover station. As the train glides gracefully into the station…

SFX: Clack-clack of a rusty train running on wheels that aren’t round, down tracks that aren’t straight, using brakepads that are no longer padded to stop at a “Station” that merely happens to be a convenient flat


area by the tracks. ...Despite the early hour and his promise to his mother, his destination is a drinking establishment called Al’s Bar, where he intends to meet his dubious “Friends” for untold mischief. But any trouble they might have stirred pales in comparison to what happened instead.

SFX: We hear Nathan boarding the train. It leaves the station

Little does Nathan know that that same train he is boarding carries another passenger familiar to you, faithful listener - mighty Neal Henderson, his shovel in hand, his mysterious contraband cylinder secreted in his waders.

NEAL Are you one of the fellas I’m supposed to meet?

NATHAN What? No.

(sniffing) Ugh, what smells?

NEAL Still? I washed and everything.

NATHAN Your boots, they’re... You're a PWC aren't you?

NEAL (annoyed)

Not anymore. Retired.

NATHAN Recently, it seems.

SFX: Neal stands and crosses to Nathan.

NEAL I'm just minding my own business, and I suggest you do the same...unless you want a faceful of Betsey.

NATHAN Are you ... propositioning me?

NEAL SFX: unsheathing the shovel

This... is Betsey.

NATHAN Sir, that's a shovel.


NEAL I know that. So mind your own before Betsey takes a bite out of your face.

NATHAN No offense, man. Geeze.

NEAL (grunts)

SFX: Neal sheaths the shovel. The train doors open and ANDREW, the PROFESSOR, the DEAN, and the TA enter.

ANDREW

I worked really hard on it! It works, too. See? You gotta let me hang out with you guys!

PROFESSOR Take it up with the Dean, Andrew. Admissions are his department.

ANDREW But he makes me retake the “Entrance exam” every time.

PROFESSOR Academic merit is important to our venerable institution.

ANDREW The “Entrance exam” is drinking a pint of lubricant without vomiting.

DEAN Well, my boy, you’ve failed each time, I’m afraid.

ANDREW It’s poison! How did you finish it?

TA Me? Oh don’t look at me. My entrance exam was true-or-false.

NEAL (loudly)

Excuse me boring science people.

PROFESSOR Ugh. A lay-person.

DEAN Now now, we need their patronage, Professor. It’s not all about pure research, you know, running an organization like ours is a business too.


PROFESSOR Very well. Jareth, see what the oaf wants.

TA (rattling this off from rote)

Right, sir. Welcome, my friend, to our weekly Science Fair. Our specials of the day are Francium and Potassium, and our seasonal offering is a fine lycopodium powder. We’re out of the magnesium and insulated copper wire. May I take your order?

NATHAN Potassium?

ANDREW (chuckles)

Hell yeah.

NEAL I’m not with them. And I’m not here to shop - I’m looking for an appraisal - maybe to sell.

TA Above my pay grade. Talk to the Dean.

NEAL Well Dean,

DEAN The Dean.

NEAL Right, well the Dean, let me show you what I’ve got…

SFX: NEAL rummages down his waders for something.

DEAN

I’m not that kind of doctor, you know.

NEAL What? No! I just want to show you this thing.

SFX: He pulls out the containment tube. We hear it thrum.

ANDREW A turd?

NEAL A tube.


ANDREW It looks like a turd.

NEAL It also looks like a tube, okay? TIME MARKER- 25:01

DEAN Hush, both of you. Hmmm…Professor?

PROFESSOR Right-o.

SFX: The PROFESSOR snaps on rubber gloves

Cylindrical. Twenty centimeters in length, high carbon steel, pressure clamps…this is a class-five containment tube.

SFX: The TUBE goes “Beep.”

(Pleasantly startled) Oh! It beeped!

NEAL Yeah, it does that. Right, so. Class five, eh? Nice. Pret-ty nice.

DEAN You must be joking. Class five tubes are reserved for the deadliest infectious diseases! We should all have haz-mat suits on.

NEAL Well what’s in it?

PROFESSOR No way to know for sure without opening it up. Which I could try-

SFX: The Dean snatches the tube from The Professor.

DEAN No! We don’t want to be anywhere near this when it cracks open. There could be rat flu in there.

PROFESSOR But...I’m so curious!


DEAN No!

PROFESSOR Sigh…

SFX: The emergency brakes on the people mover are thrown, and it screeches to a halt.

DEAN

We are unable to assist you at this time, and will be relocating our Science Fair immediately.

TA (again, by rote)

Thank you for shopping at the Science Fair we wish you the best fortune in lab safety and hope you come again-

DEAN Not now, Jareth, we’re leaving.

SFX: The PROFESSOR, DEAN, and TA exit through the train car.

ANDREW

Wait - hey, wait, you guys! I wanna do science with you!

TA Scram, kid.

SFX: They slam the door in ANDREW’s face.

ANDREW

Aw, man.

NATHAN I know what’s inside.

SFX: The train starts up again. NEAL

Yeah, and I smell like hot cocoa on a cold morning.

NATHAN I’ve seen it before. I know where it came from. It beeps every hour, on the hour.

NEAL You might have guessed that.

NATHAN


But I didn’t. Two days ago I was on level ten in a sealed corporate lab stealing...something unrelated. And I saw that containment tube on a desk.

SFX: Neal crosses to Nathan. NEAL

So what’s inside?

NATHAN The scientist who had it is a biologist. I think she was doing research into genetic engineering. That tube contains a sample of very advanced, very expensive, genetically-engineered tissue. Or seeds. Or whatever. I don’t know, I’m not a scientist.

NEAL Well then how did it end up in my putrescible waste field?

NATHAN I’m not sure. But I know someone who will want it back. Someone willing to pay a lot of money, I’d bet.

NEAL Remarkably, that’s exactly what I’m in need of at the moment.

NATHAN I think we can do business. A partnership?

NEAL If you know where to find this person...why not!

SFX: They shake hands. Nathan winces at Neal’s grip.

NATHAN

Okay. Tomorrow night, meet me at Al’s bar. I have to make a few calls.

ANDREW Okay. I’m in too!

NEAL You’re still here?

ANDREW Yeah. I’ve been here the whole time.

NATHAN Ah, geeze. He knows too much. We have to get rid of him.

ANDREW No I don’t!


NEAL (responding to Nathan)

Well okay.

SFX: NEAL pries open the door to the train while it is still moving.

This is your stop. Sorry about this.

SFX: NEAL hurls ANDREW from the train. He rolls and bounces, finally coming to a stop.

ANDREW

Oof!

HERBERT WEST Oh dear! That’s no way to exit a moving train. You’ve got to hold your arms out like a barrel and roll away from the tracks.

ANDREW Who are you?

NARRATOR While Neal Henderson and Nathan Rourke scheme and plot together, noble forces from HartLife’s finest are already at work trying to reclaim the Company’s property. We bring you now to the utilitarian office of Vice President Edward Davenport. Although technically aboveground, the room’s location on the interior of the Tower precludes windows, natural light, or (it would seem) cheer or happiness of any kind from entering. One single light swings overhead. Seated across from him is Mr. George Chamberlain, Special Investigator, lean and restless, perched on a metal chair.

DAVENPORT Chamberlain, George. Special Investigator. Policy number 5643. Do you...blink?

CHAMBERLAIN No.

DAVENPORT Could you? You’re freaking me out. CHAMBERLAIN Certainly.

DAVENPORT (Shuddering)

Ugh, I take it back. It’s worse when you do.


CHAMBERLAIN I know. DAVENPORT We’ll make this quick, then. A containment tube belonging to a top secret corporate lab has been stolen. CHAMBERLAIN Did our brilliant scientists check the last place they left it? DAVENPORT You’re funny.

CHAMBERLAIN No.

DAVENPORT (agreeing with him)

...No. The lab was tossed. Only two things were taken - a basic medical textbook...and a class five containment tube. It didn’t even trip the sensors when it was taken. CHAMBERLAIN Through the garbage chutes? DAVENPORT You’re close. You familiar with how putrescible waste is processed? CHAMBERLAIN They flushed the thing? DAVENPORT Bingo. And we have reason to believe a PWC named Henderson picked the thing up and walked off with it. He hasn’t reported to work.

SFX: Davenport pulls out a file. CHAMBERLAIN I can eliminate him and get you your containment tube by this afternoon. (wryly) Should I wear a radiation suit? DAVENPORT Henderson is not our target. Whoever flushed this thing planned to recover it - and they’re far more dangerous than the schmuck who just found the thing. Tail Henderson and the tube until someone makes a move on it. Find that person - and do a standard cleanup op.

SFX: Chamberlain stands and crosses towards the door..

Oh, and one other thing – you’re going to have help. TIME MARKER: 30:20


SFX: Chamberlain crosses back to the desk, frustrated.

CHAMBERLAIN I work alone. DAVENPORT Not today you don’t. CHAMBERLAIN (hisses) DAVENPORT Henderson’s found himself a business partner, some punk kid named Nathan Rourke. Rourke’s mother works with StreetSafe. She’ll know where to find them. CHAMBERLAIN You can’t be serious. DAVENPORT She used to work in the field. CHAMBERLAIN A hundred years ago? DAVENPORT I wouldn’t say that to her face if I were you. She’s on her way now. CHAMBERLAIN I’m not too worried. I’m sure the walker slows her down some. DAVENPORT Play nice, Chamberlain.

SFX: A knock. The door opens. Ah, Mrs. Rourke. Please, sit down. ELIZABETH

(with obvious fear) Thank you. What is this about, please?

DAVENPORT You’re not in any trouble, Mrs. Rourke. You can relax.

ELIZABETH Oh, I – thank you. The sign on the door –


DAVENPORT We get that all the time, ma’am, sorry for the confusion. M.U.R.D.E.R. is actually an acronym for our department. An unfortunate coincidence. Stands for ‘Municipal Union for the Restructuring of District….Excavation…uh, Records’. Nothing sinister, I assure you.

ELIZABETH Alright… DAVENPORT I’m Edward Davenport. Mr. Chamberlain is my associate, here. CHAMBERLAIN And now I have met you. DAVENPORT Mrs. Rourke, we’re here about your son.

ELIZABETH …Oh? DAVENPORT Elizabeth – may I call you Elizabeth?

SFX: Davenport rolls his chair back, crosses around the desk.

Are you aware that young Nathan hasn’t reported for his work assignment even once? ELIZABETH Why, no. I’m sure there is some mistake. DAVENPORT You and I both know better. We’ve been keeping track of your activities at work – you’ve been watching your son on the corporation’s equipment, and on the corporation’s time. ELIZABETH I- DAVENPORT Which I can overlook...provided you help us. Right now, Nathan is in the company of a criminal named Henderson. They are trying to sell a piece of contraband. I can’t go into too much detail, but the item they are carrying is extremely dangerous to your son. Not only is it a potential biohazard, but there are those who would kill him without a thought to get their hands on it. ELIZABETH Why are you telling me all of this? DAVENPORT We’re having a hard time predicting your son’s movements.


ELIZABETH That sounds like him. DAVENPORT But you know his habits, better than anyone. We need you to go into the field with Agent Chamberlain and find him, before anything happens to him. ELIZABETH You mean anything other than what you’ll do to him. DAVENPORT Elizabeth, we are doing this for your son’s sake. His safety is our top priority.

SFX: Elizabeth stands.

ELIZABETH You and I both know better. I read the sign on the door. DAVENPORT Mr. Chamberlain will be going out to find your son one way or another. When that happens- CHAMBERLAIN It will. DAVENPORT …do you want to be there, or not? We’re giving you a choice. ELIZABETH …I’ll go with you. But if you do anything to hurt him, I swear-

SFX: Chamberlain pushes back his chair, crossing to the door.

CHAMBERLAIN Whatever. Let’s go. NARRATOR And so, the unlikely pair sets forth into the underbelly of Our Fair City to locate our alliterative vagabonds, Neal and Nathan. Let us descend with them away from the lofty tower and into the City Below to comfortable C-deck, to the famous watering hole known as Al’s Bar. Everyone knows Al’s bar is the only place to keep your business your business, and attracts such a varied clientele that George Chamberlain and Elizabeth Rourke barely stand out.

SFX: Bar ambience, musicians singing “Rolling down to Tunnel Three.”

ELIZABETH


I promise, Mr. Chamberlain, this is where he’ll be. He spends enough of my credits here that I should know. NARRATOR The unlikely couple make their way to the end of the bar farthest from the door. The bar’s tables are populated by a smattering of pleasant looking people; a corporate copy boy here, a food pill processor there. All of them are chatting over glasses of clear liquid. ELIZABETH Is that them?

CHAMBERLAIN Your son is not due for another two hundred and fifty-six seconds.

SFX: rustling, click

ELIZABETH You use a pocket recorder? CHAMBERLAIN

(Into his recorder) Location: Al's Bar, C deck, Subjects: Neal Henderson… ELIZABETH Do you have to do that right now?

CHAMBERLAIN Nathan Rourke. Investigator: George Chamberlain.

SFX: Elizabeth clears her throat. Also investigating...Elizabeth Rourke. Usual patron types are present. Estimated arrival of targets: four minutes. TIME MARKER: 35:02

ELIZABETH My son is not a ‘subject’, he is a policy. And I may be here with you, but I’m not exactly a willing associate.

CHAMBERLAIN No one pointed a gun to your head. I was there. I would have noticed something like that.

ELIZABETH It was there.

SFX: The door to Al’s bar opens, we hear Neal and Nathan enter.


CHAMBERLAIN Shh. They approach.

SFX: the bar noise gets louder, almost imperceptibly, as we listen in on the action.

ELIZABETH What are they talking about?

CHAMBERLAIN I believe they are discussing the contraband in question.

ELIZABETH He looks awfully young for this crowd…

CHAMBERLAIN Be. Quiet. And listen.

NEAL Hey, Kid. Do we have a meeting?

NATHAN Hey, I don’t call you “poo-pants.” You don’t call me kid, got it. NEAL But you do call me poo-pants.

NATHAN I don’t care, I’m not a kid. NEAL Okay, Nathan, do we have a meeting? NATHAN Don’t use my name either. From now on you may refer to me as your associate, or your representative but leave my name out of it. NEAL Hey, my associate, if you would like to continue your day without a shovel-shaped dent in your ass I recommend you get on with telling me whether we have got a meeting or not. NATHAN Okay, keep your waders on. I was able to reach the scientist whose lab I...visited.

NEAL Won’t she know you stole it?

NATHAN


She didn’t see me, and anyway, I didn’t steal it. Someone else must have, after I left.

NEAL What do you think we can get for it? I...I got this girl, understand?

NATHAN Enough to make her very happy. Just leave it all to me. Is the containment tube safe?

NEAL I left it with someone I trust. She’ll keep it safe.

NATHAN Fine. Don’t tell me where it is - I don’t want to know in case we get caught.

SFX: NATHAN slides away from the bar and starts to leave.

NEAL

Okay then.

SFX: NEAL follows him.

NATHAN What are you doing? NEAL I’m going with you. NATHAN What? No. Buddy, I don’t think you understand how this kind of business goes down. It’s not really your speed. No offense.

NEAL You are not my buddy, and I will be coming.

SFX: Neal and Nathan push each other as the “debate” escalates.

NATHAN Won’t. Won’t. Wooooon’t.

NEAL Will. Will. Wiiiiiiiil! WILL.

NATHAN Fine. But give the waders a wash first?


NEAL

(a little bit hurt) I did...

SFX: NEAL and NATHAN exit Al’s.

CHAMBERLAIN Wait five seconds, then exit casually with me.

ELIZABETH I’ve tailed a suspect before, I know how it’s done.

CHAMBERLAIN We’re not tailing them. We’re going to pay a visit to the relations technicians.

ELIZABETH What?

CHAMBERLAIN They don’t have the item in question. I know where they’ve hidden it. Neal Henderson has a “Known associate.”

SFX: Chamberlain and Elizabeth stand and exit.

NARRATOR

And so, the pair of sleuths departs in pursuit of their quarry...but let us linger a moment longer at Al’s. Not for the ambiance, dear listener, nor the fine refreshments which HartLife serves there; but for the conversation. Specifically one surreptitious conversation in a quiet corner, overlooked by all but your most diligent narrator while compiling these true dramatizations.

ANDREW Hi.

ALISON Hi.

ANDREW I’m Andrew. Nice to meet you. Sit down?

ALISON Aww, that’s sweet, but I’m actually meeting someone.

ANDREW Yep. That’s me. Please sit. (Reciting.) “The wind is in the west.”


ALISON You’re Dr. West? You’re not what I expected.

SFX: Alison sits.

ANDREW Oh no, no, no. I WORK for Dr. West. First day on the job. Anyway, he told me get the “thing” before I give you the money.

SFX: Alison startles back from the table. ALISON

You’re carrying the money with you?

ANDREW Why?

ALISON No reason. I’m just really surprised you’ve survived this long.

ANDREW Me too.

ALISON I’ve got “the thing.” Here.

SFX: Unzipping bag. Sound of the containment tube.

ANDREW

Huh?

ALISON What?

ANDREW I saw a containment tube just like this a few days ago. They’re pretty rare…I think. Say, maybe it’s the same one. Did you get this off a kid and a PWC? SFX: Zipping the bag up.

ALISON No. I don’t know anyone like that.

ANDREW Are you sure? You’d remember this guy. He talked funny and smelled terrible and kept talking about a girl named Betsey. I think she’s his…shovel.

ALISON I said I don’t know him alright.


ANDREW Oh. Okay then.

SFX: Putting a bag on the table and unzipping it.

This bag has all the money in it.

ALISON SHH!

ANDREW (Whispering.) Sorry. It’s all there. Do you want to count it?

ALISON Idiot, I’m trying to keep a low profile here, so shut up, slide me the bag UNDER the table, and don’t talk loudly about the significant sum of illegal black-market currency you’re carrying.

ANDREW Sorry. You don’t have to call me an idiot.

ALISON Just try not to get us killed, okay? SFX: Sound of bag sliding. Now, what about the other part of my compensation?

ANDREW ...Ah. Slight problem there.

ALISON What do you mean?

ANDREW Well, you’re all set. You’ll be automatically erased from all corporate records at the end of the shift...

ALISON But? TIME MARKER: 40:00

ANDREW The other person - Neal? He’s been tagged as a ‘person of interest’ in the database. We can’t erase him.

ALISON


That was the deal, pipsqueak.

SFX: ALISON reaches across the table to throttle ANDREW.

ANDREW

(Struggling to breathe) I know! But it’s not my fault.

ALISON Then whose is it?

ANDREW His? I guess? I don’t know...people are staring.

ALISON (releasing him, and sighing)

You may have a point. I told him to keep a low profile. Grrr, he can’t do anything right.

ANDREW What will you do?

ALISON I’ll go without him. The deal is still on.

ANDREW You won’t have a residence assignment or food allotment or anything.

ALISON Let me worry about that. If I told you my plans, I wouldn’t really be disappearing would I?

ANDREW Guess that makes sense.

ALISON Anyway, are we done here?

SFX: Andrew stands.

ANDREW Yep. Dr. West said I should wish you good luck in your new life.

SFX: Alison exits.

NARRATOR

Dear listener, you have heard it for yourself. With a furtive handoff and a single glance over her shoulder, Alison has sold the precious containment tube, betraying the trust of her erstwhile odiferous paramor as well as the Company that provided for her throughout her life in one swoop. Why she did it is beyond the speculation of your humble narrator...but regardless, her


sale of the lost containment tube remains a secret to Neal and Nathan as we rejoin them on H-deck at the rough-hewn end of an unfinished tunnel. This far from civilization, the ear strains against the silence, probing for any sound of breath or footfall that would betray another human presence...or for any sound of scraping or chittering that would accompany, perhaps, something inhuman... Neal and Nathan, however, have come too far to turn back now.

SFX: Neal and Nathan are walking through a rough, pebbly tunnel.

NEAL You better not screw this up.

NATHAN I won't. NEAL I don't like you. NATHAN Oh no... NEAL And I don't trust you. NATHAN You’re not as dumb as you smell. NEAL I know you're a smartass, and we’re all very impressed. But can you set aside your little jokes for one minute? This containment tube is my ticket to a fresh start with the love of my life and I will NOT blow it on your account.

NATHAN Relax. I've got it. NEAL Well, that's reassuring. (it is not) NATHAN We’re almost there. Try to act natural. She was only expecting one of us. NEAL You didn't tell her I was coming?! NATHAN Well I didn't know you'd be here. NEAL


I don't trust you- NATHAN Ya. I got it. Just let me do the talking, okay? NEAL Fine. NATHAN Fine.

SFX: A bizzare whirring as a futuristic motorcycle pulls up.

NEAL (under his breath)

Asshat. NATHAN What did you call me? CALIGARI Ah, you're here. I thought you'd be alone. Do you have the containment tube with you? NEAL Of course not. CALIGARI No, of course not. And who are you, so pungent and so brash? NATHAN He's a business associate - his name is not important. CALIGARI He was not invited. NEAL Beg your pardon, ma'am, but talk like that might make a fellow feel unwelcome. Neal's the name. NATHAN Dammit, Neal, I said no names. CALIGARI Doctor Caligari. A pleasure, Neal. NEAL I'm sorry Nathan here-


NATHAN No names! NEAL I'm sorry Nathan didn't let you know I'd be coming along, but the containment tube belongs to me, and I'm not about to- NATHAN Will you shut up already? CALIGARI I thought Mr. Henderson was doing quite well. NATHAN I would appreciate it, Doctor, if you would-

SFX: Neal shoves Nathan aside. NEAL I don't remember offering you my last name. CALIGARI Somewhat unnerving, is it not? Now, can we please dispense with the misguided cloak-and-dagger routine and get down to business? You, Neal Henderson, found a containment tube in a pile of putrescible waste and now you wish to sell the item. Do you know what is inside? NEAL No. NATHAN Dammit, Neal, stop TELLING her stuff! NEAL She knows everything anyway. So. What’s this thing worth to ya? CALIGARI It will be difficult for me to assess the value of the item without first examining it. If it is damaged, it is worthless. Might we adjourn to its present location so that I can name an appropriate figure? NATHAN I'm afraid that won't be possible, Doctor. A third party has taken it to a safe location. Even I don’t know where it is. CALIGARI But Neal knows.

NEAL


Well…

CALIGARI Ah. It’s with Alison. Incidentally, since you brought Neal along, she is technically a fourth party. Don’t try to sound smart. NEAL You stay the hell away from Alison. If anything happens to her I'll kill you. NATHAN Neal!

SFX: Nathan jumps in front of Neal.

What he means, Dr. Caligari, ma'am, is that we'd prefer to meet another time on neutral ground. We'll bring the tube next time. CALIGARI Do that. And I suggest you both be on your best behavior next time.

SFX: Dr. Caligari exits, engine roaring off. TIME MARKER: 45:00 NATHAN WHAT was that?! You tipped our hand. NEAL She already knew everything! NATHAN And you threatened her! NEAL I don't trust her. NATHAN You don't trust anyone!

NEAL I trust Alison.

NATHAN I certainly hope so. She’s got our meal ticket. NEAL She'll keep it safe. NATHAN


She better. Because Caligari knew where we'd hid it. If she can find out, maybe others can. NEAL

(This sinks in) We've got to go to her! She's not safe! Come on!

SFX: NEAL sprints away.

NATHAN Aw, aw that...hey, wait up!

SFX:NATHAN follows.

NARRATOR And so our heroes dash off to rescue Neal's beloved Alison. But what they don’t know might kill them - for recall, dear listener, that the stoic and violence-prone Agent George Chamberlain has a head start on them.

SFX: A hail of gunfire, Chamberlain’s signature, is heard. He then kicks the door in.

ELIZABETH I thought you agents have access codes to every door in the tunnels? CHAMBERLAIN Yes. Why do you ask? ELIZABETH ...no reason. What are we looking for? CHAMBERLAIN You are standing here in the doorway. You are not touching anything at all. You will let me conduct the search. ELIZABETH I’m just glad to help.

SFX: We hear Chamberlain violently searching in the background underneath the following conversation.

I will stand here obediently. CHAMBERLAIN It’s not in the sofa. ELIZABETH


I will let you conduct the search. CHAMBERLAIN Not in the closet. ELIZABETH I hope I will be letting you conduct cleaning up this mess, too. CHAMBERLAIN It’s not under the bed. ELIZABETH I will stand here annoying you until you let me help. CHAMBERLAIN FINE! Fine, help me look. It’s a containment tube, yea big. ELIZABETH Okay…

SFX: the search continues What about this?

SFX: a paper rustles. The search stops. CHAMBERLAIN “Al’s nine”.

SFX: Chamberlain sniffs the paper.

She wrote this. ‘Al’s nine’...damn! She has it with her. Dammit, she has it with her. ELIZABETH Al’s? We were just there. CHAMBERLAIN

(regaining his calm) We just missed her. She won’t be there long. We may be able to catch her.

ELIZABETH No, she has too much of a head start. But if we go up into the tower - my surveillance station isn’t far. We can find her at Al’s and track her on the cameras.

CHAMBERLAIN I see no choice.

SFX: Footsteps as they exit.


SFX: Footsteps as Neal and Nathan enter. NEAL Alison? Hello?

NATHAN I take it this place doesn’t normally look ransacked.

NEAL Not usually, no. Wait, what are those.

NATHAN They look like...bullet holes.

NEAL Alison!

NATHAN The tube!

SFX: Neal runs into the next room. Nathan begins frantically opening cabinets and drawers.

NEAL

Where is she? Where is she? NATHAN

Where is it? Where is it?

NEAL She’s not in the bathroom.

NATHAN It has to be here.

NEAL Or under the bed.

NATHAN Come on.

NEAL Or behind the sofa.

(Panting.) She isn’t here.

NATHAN I’m aware of that, Neal. Where’s the containment tube?


NEAL What if she’s hurt? Or dead? Or worse?

NATHAN If she was, there’d be blood or something. She probably wasn’t even here when all this happened.

NEAL Right. Right, she’s smart. She probably got away. NATHAN Now, the containment tube? NEAL The tube? Uh, the closet. I should check and see if it’s there.

NATHAN Ya think.

SFX: Door opening and things being thrown around.

NEAL

...It’s gone.

NATHAN

What?

NEAL The canister, it’s not here.

NATHAN Are you sure? Let me see.

SFX: Rifling around through clothing.

NEAL First, they took the canister. Then, they took Alison.

NATHAN Who took her?

NEAL They. Them. The They who do things.

NATHAN Riiight. Okay. We need a plan. Maybe if I go to Caligari and explain things...where are you going?

SFX: Neal is walking away


NEAL

To rescue Alison.

NATHAN Where? From who?

NEAL Anywhere. From anyone.

NATHAN Just stop and let me think for a minute. There was a camera outside. Does it look like it’s working?

SFX: Neal walks to the door.

NEAL Is the red lighty thing good or bad?

NATHAN Good. It’s recording. In the morning, we can go to my mom’s StreetSafe office so I can hack into her computer and check the footage.

NEAL We don’t have until morning. Alison needs us now.

NATHAN Well we can’t very well go now unless you want to break into a closed StreetSafe office.

NEAL Alright. Let’s do that then.

SFX: Neal starts walking away.

NATHAN What? No. It’s above ground. We can’t just break into the Tower, that’s crazy.

NEAL Love makes us all crazy sooner or later.

SFX: Fading into the distance.

NATHAN But...we don’t have a cover story, a plan, anything. Neal! NEAL!

SFX: NATHAN runs after him.


NARRATOR And so the ill-fated duo sprint their way through the tunnels. To reach the tower, they had to hot-wire an elevator…

SFX: BZZT! NATHAN hotwires the elevator.

VOICE OF HARTLIFE

(powering down) Doors closiiiiiing…

SFX: Fritzing electronics Power restored! Going up.

NARRATOR And incapacitate an innocent security guard.

NEAL Sorry about this…

SFX: SPRANG! NEAL hits a guard with Betsey.

NARRATOR

And finally they find themselves at the door to Elizabeth Rourke’s security console.

NEAL (Muffled.)

How do you know no one’s in there?

NATHAN (Muffled.)

The lights are off. What are they doing, sitting alone in the dark?

SFX: NATHAN picks the lock. It'll only take a moment to pick the lock.

NEAL My way is faster.

NATHAN Oh, and what's your way?

SFX Loud bang. TIME MARKER: 50:00


NEAL

See. Faster.

NATHAN So much for quiet and subtlety.

NEAL I'll get the lights.

NATHAN No. Don't. They might tip someone off.

NEAL So we just grope around in the dark.

NATHAN Trust me. This way is safer. More covert.

SFX Bang. Ow.

NEAL What was that?

NATHAN Never mind. I found the desk. Now, let’s see. Computer on.

SFX: Nathan sits down. The computer comes on.

And…

SFX Typing. The computer dings a happy sound.

...we're in. Now, let’s see. Sector Alpha. Hallway...twelve.

NEAL Thirteen.

NATHAN Right thirteen. Camera…

SFX: A negative beep. What the?

NEAL


What is it? Did you find her?

NATHAN The surveillance footage, it...it’s been deleted.

NEAL Are you sure? Maybe if you typed a little harder.

NATHAN It’s gone. All of it. Someone wiped the entire Sector.

NEAL What'll we do?

SFX: Nathan turns off the computer.

NATHAN We need to go talk to Caligari. If someone with that kind of clearance is after this thing then...

SFX: Straw slurping. What the...? Where'd you come from?

CHAMBERLAIN I've been here the whole time. Sitting alone. In the dark.

NATHAN You’re with StreetSafe?

CHAMBERLAIN Not quite.

SFX: Gun cocking.

NATHAN Is that a gun?

NEAL Kid, look out!

SFX: Gunfire with pings from deflected bullets.

CHAMBERLAIN

Hmmph.

NATHAN You...you blocked those bullets with your shovel?


NEAL

Can't everybody?

CHAMBERLAIN Well...that makes things more interesting.

NATHAN Um...he's reloading.

NEAL Oh no he’s not.

SFX: Scuffle with shovel hits. The gun goes skittering away. Neal holds him against a wall.

Now, where is Alison?

NATHAN Ask him where the containment tube is.

SFX: Door opening. Footsteps as Elizabeth enters/

ELIZABETH I got another juice box for you Mr. Chamberlain.....Nathan?

NATHAN Mom?

NEAL Ma'am.

ELIZABETH Nathan, what's going on here?

NATHAN It's...it's a long story.

CHAMBERLAIN And a welcome distraction.

SFX: Chamberlain headbutts Neal. Neal drops Betsey.

NEAL Ow.


SFX: Neal drops Chamberlain. Chamberlain picks up Betsey.

Wha…? Hey! Betsey!

CHAMBERLAIN Hmm.

NATHAN Go get him, Neal. I got your back.

ELIZABETH Nathan, no! I forbid you from fighting an agent of M.U.R.D.E.R.

NATHAN He’s with MURDER?! Aw, man I can’t wait to tell those lightning riggers about this.

ELIZABETH What was that?

NATHAN Nothing.

NEAL

Fella, you let Betsey go right now or you and me are gonna have a serious problem.

CHAMBERLAIN Well we can’t have that.

SFX: Chamberlain throws Betsey. Glass breaking. Sudden howling wind.

NEAL

BETSEY! No! SFX: Running.

NATHAN Neal! Stop! We’re over a hundred feet up!

NEAL Hold on girl. I'm coming for yoooooouuuuuuuuu!

SFX: He leaps out the window.

NATHAN (Shouting out the window.)

Neal!


(To himself.) It’s just a shovel...

ELIZABETH Nathaniel Everett Rourke, what have you been getting yourself into. You are grounded for the rest of your natural life the moment we get home.

NATHAN Mo-om...not in front of the Murder Agent.

ELIZABETH

Right. Mr. Chamberlain. I believe you're done here.

SFX: Chamberlain walks to where his gun is. His gun scrapes against the ground as he picks it up.

CHAMBERLAIN

I'm afraid not, Mrs. Rourke.

ELIZABETH What?

CHAMBERLAIN I'm going to have to take Nathan in for a few questions. Officially.

SFX: Chamberlain cocks the gun. Young Mr. Rourke, what do you know about our data extraction program?

ELIZABETH

But...but he's safe. His associate is gone. And they don’t have the containment tube anymore. It's done.

CHAMBERLAIN It was done. However, your son mentioned someone else. Someone the corporation has a great interest in. Someone who was supposed to be dead.

NATHAN Mom, what's he talking about?

SFX: Elizabeth steps in front of Nathan. ELIZABETH

You're not taking my son.

CHAMBERLAIN Please be reasonable, Mrs. Rourke.


SFX: Chamberlain finishes reloading his gun.

ELIZABETH

You're not taking my son!

CHAMBERLAIN (Into his tape recorder.)

Let the record show, I tried.

SFX: A single gunshot

ELIZABETH N...Nath…

SFX: Thud of the body hitting the ground.

NATHAN M...Mom?

SFX: Chamberlain clicks on his recorder.

CHAMBERLAIN Let the record show: I tried.

SFX: Chamberlain clicks off his recorder.

CHAMBERLAIN Now, young Mr. Rourke, we are going to have a little conversation about your friend Dr. Caligari.

SFX: “I don’t want to feel guilty”- a loungey song fades in under the Narrator.

NARRATOR With that, the plot has tied itself up neatly for our dear Mr. Rourke. No longer alone and friendless, he finds himself held firmly in the arms of the Company, just one policy among thousands lovingly served by the HartLife corporation. But this is only the beginning, loyal listener. There is much left to tell, as the story of Our Fair City...continues.

SFX: Knocking.

SANDY and CLAY Molepeople.

SFX: Door creaking.

CLAY Hello? Anyone in here? Preferably with the correct number of legs.


(Calling out.) Sandy it's safe to come in.

SANDY (Right behind him.)

I know.

CLAY AAAH! Sandy! I told you to wait outside.

SANDY Why Clay? What did you think was in here?

CLAY Oh...uh...nothing.

SANDY Uh-huh. Go on. Say it. "I believe in Antpeople."

CLAY I don't know what you're talking about.

SANDY Okay. Hey, is that hole eight feet in diameter?

CLAY (Panicked.)

What? Where?

SANDY (Laughs.) TIME MARKER: 55:01

CLAY That's not funny.

SANDY It's a little funny.

CLAY Let's get to work. We've got to get this clean before…

SANDY and CLAY scream.

SANDY Is she...is she dead?


CLAY I...I don't know.

SFX: Clay walks over to the body. Do people normally have big holes in them?

SANDY

What am I: an expert on people anatomy?

CLAY Her snout is dry. That's bad, right?

SANDY Tap her whiskers.

SFX: Clay pokes Elizabeth’s body.

CLAY No response. We've lost her.

SANDY Poor person.

CLAY So...do we just...clean around the body?

SANDY We need to tell someone.

CLAY Who?

SANDY The overseer, a people vet, someone. And soon too, or else...

CLAY Or else...what?

SANDY (Conspiratorially.)

There are these people. They steal bodies...and do horrible experiments to bring them back as...the Woken dead.

CLAY bursts out laughing. It's true.


He's still laughing. Stop laughing.

CLAY Let me guess. Let me guess. Ol’ Silty told you this.

SANDY Me and Peat both.

CLAY I can't believe you bought that. I mean, Peat. Of course, Peat believes it. Peat's an idiot.

SANDY Peat is not an idiot.

CLAY Peat's an idiot.

SANDY Well, he may be an idiot, but at least he's smart enough to ask me out when he's got the chance.

SFX: Footsteps as Sandy exits.

CLAY (Not laughing so much anymore.)

Good one Sandy. (Calling after her.)

Sandy? You're joking right? Right? Sandy...wait- wait up...Umph

SFX Collision. Sorry about that.

HERBERT WEST Oh don't mention it. Completely my fault. Wasn't looking where I was going.

CLAY Here let me help you up.

HERBERT WEST Too kind. Thank you.

SFX Grunt of exertion. Well, must be off.

CLAY


Er, sir. Your bag.

HERBERT WEST Oh. Oh my. Thank you. I swear. I'd forget my head if it wasn't sewn on. Thank you so much.

CLAY You're welcome. Listen I have to...

HERBERT WEST Yes. Of course. Don't let me keep you.

CLAY (Fading into the distance.)

Sandy? Wait up. You didn't say yes to him, did you?

HERBERT WEST What a nice young mole.

SFX Knocking. Re-animator. Hello? Anyone in....Oh Christmas. A body. FIN- 57:32

BETSEY PALMER Loyal Policies, this is HartLife company manager Betsey Palmer. I want to take a moment and thank you for listening to Our Fair City. If you haven’t already, the best way to hear the rest of Our Fair City is to subscribe to us on iTunes, stitcher, or your favorite podcasting service. You can also follow us on facebook at facebook.com/ourfaircityradio, twitter at twitter.com/ofcradio, and get behind the scenes info and updates of facebook.com/hartlifenfp. Thank you again, and as always: we’ll see you in the tunnels.

https://www.facebook.com/ourfaircityradio/

https://twitter.com/ofcradio

https://www.facebook.com/HartLifeNFP/

Documents

Our Fair City Season One p. 1 - Amazon S3Fair+City+Season+One+Transcri… · Our Fair City Season One p. 3 ... The damp and glistening streets of level zero lie at the heart of our