A New strategy

Ephesians 5:1-17

The Goal (vv.1-2)We all need to have a goal in life, so what is yours? In these verses you will discover that God has a goal that He wants to share.

The Danger (vv. 3-7)You don’t need to be told that the world is a dangerous place. But did you realize that there are spiritual dangers, too?

The Reality (vv. 8-14)It’s easy to have a warped sense of reality in which we believe things to be the way we want them to be. That’s not God’s way!

The Question (vv. 15-17)What question should we ask before making any decision or moral choice? In this passage of Scripture, you will discover that question and its relevance to your daily life.

Now, what is the question?

Lesson

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Your daily choices reflect a personal strategy for living. It might be that you never sat down and wrote out a strategy, but you have one.

Some people let society dictate their strategies. So their choices are within the boundaries of what is legal or socially acceptable. These people encounter problems because society’s rules and norms change from time to time.

Other people choose to let the Bible guide their strategies. So they would be quick to do what the Bible says and not do what the Bible prohibits. They, however, struggle in the areas where the Bible is silent or unclear.

A third possibility is the strategy of self-centeredness. People who operate from this viewpoint seek only to please themselves with little regard for other people or the long term consequences of their choices.

All three of these strategies are evident among people who call themselves believers. So, is any of these the preferred strategy or is there a choice we haven’t yet mentioned?

The religious scene in the first century was confusing, to say the least. The rise of Christianity took place in a pluralistic society in which different people groups held

to different views about higher powers and religious practices. Things you and I would label as blatantly immoral were religious activities for some people.

The Roman Empire had given birth to a kind of intellectualism that viewed faith in God as simplistic and unsophisticated. Legalistic Jews rejected Christianity as being cultish and weak in its reverence for God’s rules.

Culture was on the upswing. Many people were successful in their businesses. Entertainment was on the rise. Self-gratification became the new hallmark of social interaction. Being a believer wasn’t easy.

Things haven’t changed much, have they? The challenges of the first century are the same as those of today. Believers still wonder how they can live for God in the midst of such social and religious confusion.

The Bible has a lot to say about wisdom. Apparently it’s a big deal. Several books of the Bible are categorized as “wisdom literature.” So wisdom is something God created for our benefit and for His glory.

There are three general ways to view wisdom. The first two views are very self-centered and secular. First, some define wisdom as the ability to succeed in life. Second, it is described as the study of the essence of life.

wisdom

Setting the Scene

The third definition of wisdom is based on Scripture and is rooted in God and a person’s faith in Him. Wisdom is the practical application of God’s principles and standards. When we are holy, we are wise.

Proverbs 2 identifies the outcome of wisdom—discretion (vv. 11-15). This is the core concept in this lesson.

Francis Bacon said, “A prudent question is one-half of wisdom.” In this lesson, we will deal with a prudent question that I first discovered in Any Stanley’s book, The Best Question Ever.

What do you want to be when you grow up? I’m sure someone asked you that question when you were younger. Some people, even as adults, are still dealing with that question.

I was raised in a poor home with alcoholic parents. In addition, both of my parents were heavy smokers. Today, my parents are in their 80s but their lives are constant reminders of the choices they made earlier in life.

If you would have asked my father when he was younger about his hopes and dreams for the future, he would not have said that he eagerly anticipated being confined to his home with an oxygen tube in his nose. Yet, because he made an unwise choice at a very young age, that is his situation today.

A lot of people today are making the same kinds of choices. Because the Bible doesn’t forbid something, they believe the choice is theirs. They rationalize and legitimize behaviors that put them as close to the edge as possible.

So what is the goal? Take a look at Ephesians 5:1-2. Paul instructed the Christians at Ephesus to make it their goal to imitate God. The Greek word for imitators also can be translated followers.

We don’t have a problem with this concept. We all are imitators or followers. But what is the object of our imitation? Are we imitating the world and its philosophies? Are we following our wants and desires? Paul said to imitate God. This changes everything.

I’ve met Christians who are unapologetic in their desire to imitate the world. I heard one say that had “grown” to the point where he could act like the world without compromising his convictions. The only problem is that the Bible never gives us permission to imitate the world.

Paul didn’t tell us to imitate the world. He didn’t tell us to try to fit in with the world. We were never told to compromise our convictions so we will be liked by the world. We are told throughout Scripture to be holy.

Second Timothy 1:8-9 makes it clear: “So do not be ashamed to testify about our Lord, or ashamed of me as his prisoner. But join with me in suffering for the gospel, by the power of God, who has saved us and called us to a holy life—not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace.”

Do you see any wiggle room in those verses? Is God OK with our chameleon-like faith? Paul told Timothy to be bold in standing up and speaking up for godliness. Why? Because God didn’t leave us here to fit in or to make ourselves happy. He left us here to serve Him.

What is discretion and how do you decide what to do in situations where the Bible is silent or vague?

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notes

The goal

Ephesian 5:1-2

Think about your most recent decisions regarding “gray areas.” Did you imitate God or the world? Why?

The goal for authentic believers is to be like God in our attitudes and behaviors. When we make this our goal, we will be ready to take the next step.

We understand the process of displacement. If you fill a glass with water and then add ice cubes, the glass will overflow because of the water that was displaced.

This principle works in our lives, as well. When God moves in, some attitudes and behaviors associated with our sinful lives disappear. Paul lists some of these attitudes and behaviors in verses 3-4.

Sexual immorality, impurity, and greed—these characteristics that are celebrated and encouraged by our society are presented as dangers to believers. Why?

It is through these sins that Satan attempts to destroy God’s work in and through the lives of His people. The Bible often connects theses sins because they are so uncharacteristic of God.

Verse 4 deals with verbal sins. When God moves in, speech that is obscene, degrading, foolish, dirty, suggestive, or immoral is replaced with an attitude of thanksgiving.

Whoa! Think about your speech and draw your own conclusion about God’s presence in your life. Your speech is one of the fruits of your relationship with God.

Here’s the problem—a lot of believers will go to church, attend Small Group, serve, and give in

hopes that their religious activity will counteract their worldly attitudes and behaviors.

That’s not how it works. God isn’t impressed with what we do for Him. He doesn’t overlook ungodly behavior because He owes us. God is holy and He demands that we also be holy.

Paul warns about the danger associated with being tolerant of immorality. So, what is immoral? The Bible offers some specific guidelines and then some general principles. If we do a thorough investigation we will come to the conclusion that immorality is anything that is dishonoring to God or inconsistent with His character.

For believers, there is a huge danger involved in imitating the world rather than God. The more we try to look like the world, the less effective our witness is.

Yet many believers want it both ways. They want to have one foot in each world and their rationale seems convincing. Have you ever heard some of these lines?• Jesus hung out with sinners,

why shouldn’t I? Answer: You’re not Jesus!

• How can I reach people if I don’t spend time with them? Answer: Who is really being influenced—you or them? Is your presence at their activities really drawing them closer to God or is it just a pious excuse for your lack of spiritual strength?

• Jesus wants me to “live life to the full!” Answer: When Jesus talked about the abundant life, it had nothing to do with you doing what you want to do! It was all about you living for God’s purpose with passion.

• The Bible doesn’t say we shouldn’t do this. Answer: You’re right. But the Bible does warn against giving in to sinful desires. It also tells us that we shouldn’t ruin God’s reputation.

Are you imitating God or the world? What should be your choice? What changes do you need to make?

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notes

The danger

Ephesian 5:3-7

Read verses 3-4. Which of these attitudes are the most troubling temptations for you? Why haven’t these been displaced by God’s presence?

I’m sure you’ve heard plenty of these kinds of lame excuses for self-indulgent choices. The sad thing is that they often come from the lips of people who believe that God understands. But God doesn’t understand; the Bible doesn’t teach that blending in with the ungodly is a mark of spiritual superiority! So, what is the real story?

Paul paints a very nice “before and after” picture for his readers. Take a look at verse 8. Notice the past tense statement followed by the present tense reality followed by a series of commands.

Darkness is a reference to the ways of the world. For the authentic believer, there is a line between the past and the present. We aren’t supposed to be flashing signs oscillating between on and off. But how many believers approach their spiritual lives that way?

Paul told his readers to find out what pleases God and to do it. How do we find out what pleases God? Spend time with Him and His Word. Let His Word tell you what is right and wrong.

We are good at deciding what makes sense to us and then finding Scripture to support our ideas. We see it in life, in books, and in Bible study curriculum. We have this weird idea that if we convince ourselves something is right, then it’s right. But God isn’t amused by our efforts.

Look at verse 11. Paul says to “have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them.” We are instructed to be God’s whistle-blowers. We are to have convictions that will most likely land us in solitary confinement at work and among weak Christians and non-believers. But that’s OK.

Because many “believers” value social acceptance more than God’s approval, they give in and make up spiritual-sounding explanations for their choices.

Paul has a few words for such people—”wake up, rise from the dead.” Apparently being unaffected by the sinfulness of the world is a mark of spiritual weakness, not spiritual accomplishment.

In verse 13, Paul says that everything is visible when exposed to the light. The light is a reference to God’s holiness and purity. When our goodness is held up to HIs holiness, we realize just how dingy and dirty our goodness is. So what can we do?

So, here is the moment you’ve been waiting for. Here is the question that, when asked and answered honestly, will change your attitude toward those so-called gray areas. Are you ready?

Read verse 15. Did you catch it? The question is this—Is it wise? We don’t need to ask if it’s legal or forbidden; we must ask if it’s wise. Remember, we defined wisdom as the practical application of God’s principles and standards.

Paul also contrasts being foolish with knowing God’s will. If we know

In what ways do you attempt to justify living according to your own desires? How does this make God feel about you?

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notes

The reality

Ephesian 5:8-14

Read verses 8-14. What are the instructions in this passage? How do they apply to you? Is your life light or darkness?

Paul said, “Have nothing to do with the fruitless deed of darkness.” What things in your life fall into this category? Do you avoid them or embrace them? Why?

The question

Ephesian 5:15-17

and do God’s will, we aren’t foolish. If we are foolish, we don’t know God’s will.

As Andy Stanley explains, there are three aspects of this question. Is it wise in light of…• My past experiences?• My present reality?• My future hopes and dreams?

When we look at it this way, the gray fades to black and white. If the Bible is silent on the subject, I can still make the right choice. If the Bible contradicts culture, I can still make the right choice.

This question—Is it wise?—will help us put away behaviors that are contrary to God’s desires for us. It will help us walk away from destructive behaviors that can ruin us personally and professionally.

There are a lot of hot topics about which believers disagree. Most of the disagreement is the result of spiritual immaturity, but some of it is the result of ambiguity in the Bible.

One such topic is alcohol. Is it OK for a believer to consume alcoholic beverages? I like to ask it this way: If what you are about to do takes control of your life, will you be drawn into a closer relationship with God and those He has entrusted to you?

So, if you decide to drink and it takes control of your life by becoming an addiction, will your spiritual life and your relationships with others be strengthened?

What about reading God’s Word? What happens if it becomes an addiction? What about your job, the internet, your appearance, using tobacco, overeating, memorizing Scripture, sharing your faith, and so on?

Do you see what I’m talking about? When we act as if everything is legal unless specifically prohibited by Scripture, we admit that we are

more into legalism than into an authentic relationship with the God who created us and left us here for a purpose.

Through the years, I’ve had lots of experience dealing with people who have made unwise choices. Sadly, most of those choices lead to less-than-good outcomes.

If what you’re doing takes control of your life, is it worth it? I wish someone would have asked that question to my father before he lit his first cigarette. Today, he would be untethered from the oxygen tank and able to enjoy the days he has left.

I wish someone would have asked that question to members of my family before they took their first drink of alcohol.

I wish someone would have asked that question to people who thought that joining a social networking site would be fun and entertaining.

I wish someone would have asked that to people who thought that an innocent friendship would be fine.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not picking on certain behaviors. I simply want you to start asking the right question about the things you are considering.

You will never understand what God’s will is unless you make knowing Him your passion. You will never escape making bad decisions until you make being wise more important than pleasing yourself. You will never live in real peace until you begin living within God’s boundaries rather than on the edge. What is your choice?

Do you know God’s will in life’s gray areas or are you foolish? Explain.

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notes

About what situations in your life do you wish someone would have asked you, “Is it wise?” If what you are doing takes control of your life, is it worth it?

How would asking, “Is it wise?” change your attitudes and actions?

None of us doubts that God left us here for a reason. Yet many of us have yet to embrace that reason.

A new strategy is needed if we are going to engage life the way God intended it. We must begin to ask the right question. Is it wise for you to be involved in missions?

Yes! The Bible is clear. Acts 1:8 tells us that we will be God’s witnesses. You are God’s witness, you are an effective witness, but are you effective for God or against Him?

Brian McLaren wrote a book in which he describes a conversation he had with a young skeptic. She wrote him an email which said that she would have become a Christian if she didn’t know so many Christians.

That situation is replayed hour after hour as potential believers encounter people who act as if their faith makes little difference in their lives. These “believers” make every effort to appear “unsaved” so that they will be accepted by the unsaved. Why? No matter what they say, it’s not because they are concerned about the spiritual well-being of the unsaved. In reality, they are more concerned about themselves. So, they do what the unsaved do. They go where the unsaved go. They imitate the unsaved.

But the unsaved aren’t amused. In fact, research shows that they are sickened by people whose faith is so insignificant that they can’t even stand on their own convictions.

Why are your coworkers still lost? Have you done everything to blend in with them so that they see no difference between you and them? Do you laugh at their jokes? Do you make small talk about things that don’t matter? Are you selling your soul for acceptance?

Is it wise? In light of your past, present, and future, are you making wise choices or are you just playing the part of a believer?

IntroductionWhat is your personal strategy for living?What is discretion and how do you decide what to do in situations where the Bible is silent or vague?

The Goal (vv. 1-2)Think about your most recent decisions regarding “gray areas.” Did you imitate God or the world? Why?Are you imitating God or the world? What should be your choice? What changes do you need to make?

The Danger (vv. 3-7)Read verses 3-4. Which of these attitudes are the most troubling temptations for you? Why haven’t these been displaced by God’s presence?In what ways do you attempt to justify living according to your own desires? How does this make God feel about you?

The Reality (vv. 8-14)Read verses 8-14. What are the instructions in this passage? How do they apply to you? Is your life light or darkness?Paul said, “Have nothing to do with the fruitless deed of darkness.” What things in your life fall into this category? Do you avoid them or embrace them? Why?

The Question (vv. 15-17)Do you know God’s will in life’s gray areas or are you foolish? Explain.

How would asking, “Is it wise?” change your attitudes and actions?About what situations in your life do you wish someone would have asked you, “Is it wise?” If what you are doing takes control of your life, is it worth it?

Missions MomentIn light of your past, present, and future, are you making wise choices or are you playing the role of a believer?

How should you respond to this lesson?

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notes

Missions moment Discussion guide

Mark the questions you plan to use in leading your Small Group discussion.