MOVE — ISSUE 28

MOVE PUTS COLUMBIA LEGENDS TO THE TEST

T H E K E Y T O Y O U R E N T E R T A I N M E N T

MOVE04.27.12 VOlUME 10 IssUE 28

DUDE, WHERE's MY BARIs Harpo's really the

best bar in Columbia?

KIss THE GIRl

+ in this issue

Is Emma Woodhouse still kissless in Columbia?

CRUsT A MOVEIs Shakespeare's really the

best pizza in Columbia?

move editor / brandon fostereditor-in-chief / kelly olejnik

managing editor / pat iversencopy chief / kelsey maffett

production manager / ashley lanephoto editor / nick ehrhard

designers / savannah kannberg, scott macdonald, casey purcella, ashley lane

writers / julia bush, greta weber, nate atkins, seth boster, savannah kannberg, kristin torres, kristen herhold, brandon

foster, emma woodhouse, lucia lee, dylan chapman, david adams, delia cai

staff/

MOVE • 04.27.12 2

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Letter from the old editor

They say time flies when you’re having fun, and I guess they’re right. It’s been one of the quickest semesters I can remember, and (minus a week there…) it’s been a fun one.

It’s nice to have a job that involves work you actually enjoy doing. And that alone has made working as MOVE editor a blessing. I love this stuff.

But I’ve also learned a lot. I’ve learned a lot about journalism, of course, but also about working with people, about operating as a part of a community and about keeping your brain functional at 4 a.m. And, if I’ve got one piece of advice to pass along (besides coffee), it’s that there are wonderful learning experiences that don’t involve offending large groups of people, so lean toward those. In all seriousness, I’ve honestly learned that you can never be too careful and conscientious when you are covering your community. Even if they weren’t the people you’ll rely on for coverage and readership — and they are — it is imperative that they’re always given the respect they deserve.

Now on to some thank yous:Thank you, Travis and Abby, for hiring me and teaching me

how to do this stuff, even if you wished I was Joel the whole time.

Thank you, Ashley, for letting me pretend I was actually MOVE editor.

Thank you, Kelly and Pat, for stepping in under less-than-ideal circumstances and taking the reins without a hitch. I look forward to seeing what you guys will bring to The Maneater next year.

And Delia, good luck with everything next year. You guys are in good hands, so keep on reading MOVE. (You are reading every week, right?)

And as for me… Well, funny story: I’m not even a magazine guy. Or even a pop culture guy. I’m actually a sports guy. So I’ll be headed to the Missourian to finally get some sports experience under my belt, if they’ll have me.

But, if you couldn’t tell from last week’s issue, I have a passion for music, and I’m so glad The Maneater gave me the opportunity to work with this love before I MOVE (sorry) on to the next one.

I’ve also developed another love over this semester: the city of Columbia. Even now, I’m still discovering more and more unique, amazing things about this place. So if I could leave you with one last bit of advice and a pun to boot, it would be to make the most of your time in Columbia. You’re only in college once. That’s the motto, right? #COMO

brandon foster | MOVE editor

Letter from the new editor

First and foremost, I’m a fangirl.And not even the legit kind who make it past superhulk

concert bouncers to meet and greet rock stars backstage. I mean, it’s a pretty good day already if I can make it past the glass doors at Memorial Union on my first try (Push? Pull? Roundhouse kick?). So I guess I’m more of a wanna-be fangirl, the kind who shamelessly professes to have so-and-so’s music etched forever in her soul, but who can’t even merit a lead vocalist’s second glance in a furiously moshing crowd. Especially not at 5-foot-4.

When I came to Mizzou last fall, I was still starry-eyed but didn’t think my chances of elite elbow-rubbing were going to be any better, despite all the celebrities and musicians running amok in CoMo (context: I hail from a 900-person village in central Illinois). But when I heard Taking Back Sunday was coming to Columbia and MOVE gave me the chance to do a concert preview for them, you would have heard my squeals for miles. Assuming they weren’t ultrasonic.

So, I really want to say that MOVE is where dreams come true—except I’d still like to marry Joseph Gordon-Levitt, and MOVE/fate sort of dropped the ball on that in October, so for now, I’ll just say that MOVE is where some serious magic can happen. That’s why I’m so thrilled to be the new editor this fall. I can’t wait to meet and work with all you writers, photographers, bloggers, columnists, Twitter-ers (Tweeters? Tweeps?) and of course, readers out there. Here’s to a semester of awesome journalism, lots of learning and probably lots more squealing, too.

delia cai | future MOVE editor

Let’s do some Columbia word association.Pizza? Shakespeare’s. Bar? Harpo’s. Mexican? El Rancho.No brainers, right? Or are they?As Columbia residents, we’re lucky to have such beloved

community staples. But what if they don’t quite live up to the myth? (Or, more likely, what if they live up to the myth, but some other place lives up to it even more?)

Here at MOVE, we decided to see if these places really merit their legendary status. It might be blasphemy to even question the reign of a place like Shakespeare’s, but we just had to know.

So we examined nine local legends: Shakespeare’s, El Rancho, Sub Shop, Booches, Harpo’s, Sparky’s, The Blue Note, Flat Branch and Ragtag.

Join us as we take a taste, a listen and a look at some CoMo classics. We might just bust a few myths in the process.

Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?

04 MEXICAN // EL RANCHOSANDWICH // SUB SHOPCOLUMN // NRDS NEED LUV 2

03 PIZZA // SHAKESPEARE'SCOLUMN // KISSLESS IN COMO

05 BURGER // BOOCHESBAR // HARPO'S

06 ICE CREAM // SPARKY'SVENUE // THE BLUE NOTECOLUMN // REEL TALK

07 THEATER // RAGTAGRESTAURANT // FLAT BRANCHCOLUMN // DAY BY DAYVID

bustin' COMO's Myths get out the way

MOVE ,

04.27.12 • MOVE 3

Two finals, six meal points and seven days stand between me and sweet, sweet summer. The kids constantly playing Frisbee on the quad and the beautiful weather are actually too much to handle when I’m writing papers and reading textbooks I neglected all semester. Summer is in the air.

So is success.Thank God, because I really was not looking forward to the

“I’m actually still kissless, but it’s fine with me because I’m a better person and I learned all these great lessons anyway, and some day my Mr. Knightley will come find me” final installment of this adventure. Wonderful readers (I’m talking to you, copy editors. Wink.), I’ve been kissed.

Romeo was getting more and more distant. He cancelled our date for a “conflict” and stopped texting me every second of the day. To be honest, it was probably a good thing. I was trying to give him a fair shot, but I still wasn’t really feeling it.

It’s always weird when two people let a fling fizzle out, and now we’re going to have to be awkward around each other until the end of time. It’s a good thing that’s coming up soon or I would be worried. If we fell apart in a week, though, I can’t even imagine what kind of mess we’d be in if we tried to make it work. I quickly bid adieu to Romeo and accepted my kissless fate.

Enter: Steve (musical, writer, kind of a nature boy). We were the kind of friends who acknowledge each other in the street and occasionally end up at the same house or apartment on the weekends. I had just gotten back from dinner and was looking forward to a quiet evening of homework when my phone vibrated with a text message. Steve had an extra ticket to a show. Since I still had a paper to write and a few chapters of history to read, I grabbed my coat and headed out the door.

Three hours later, we were making out.I’m kidding! Well, not really, but I’ll tell you the whole story! I

promise. So there we are, at the show, kind of bored and a little unimpressed.

“Do you want to leave?” he asked.He grabbed my hand, and we did. We wandered around

downtown in the dark, stopping at benches and ducking into empty bars, just to explore. It was basically a ton of romantic, “(500) Days of Summer”-esque IKEA shit, let me tell you. Finally, we found our way back to his apartment.

Kissing is weird. The best part isn’t the kissing itself, but the moment before the kiss, right before two pairs of lips find each other. Your heads lean together, and there’s a mutual understanding of what’s coming next. This is just a theory, but Winnie the Pooh agrees with me, and he’s my go-to philosopher, so I think I’m on the right track.

“’Well,’ said Pooh, ‘what I like best,’ and then he had to stop and think. Because although eating honey was a very good thing to do, there was a moment just before you began to eat it which was better than when you were, but he didn’t know what it was called.’”

Something about the electrical anticipation that leads up to a kiss is better than the kiss itself. I mean, since I’ve been kissed once, I’m basically the authority on the matter. This theory applies not only to the few seconds before a kiss, but to the semester I spent waiting for it.

Not that it was anti-climactic — it was actually the perfect circumstance for a first kiss: at a time I didn’t expect with a guy I didn’t expect. But the buildup was way more fun. Now, somebody change that banner up there from “Kissless” to “Kissed.” Who do you think I am, Sandra Dee?

Emma’s first kiss comes just in time to say goodbye to spring semester.

emma woodhouse

KISSLESS IN COLUMBIA

romance columnist

Springtime and the kissin’s easy

MOVE hIghLIghtS

As if Edgar Allan Poe didn’t sufficiently creep you out enough in high school lit class, “V for Vendetta” director James McTeigue brings all that macabre, shudder-inducing goodness to life in this two-hour mystery thriller that’s rated R for bloody violence and grisly images. And you thought poetry was boring.

(MOVIE RELEASE)thE RAVEnOPENS: FRIday, aPRIl 27

Contrary to popular belief, Norah Jones has released three albums since 2002’s Grammy-winning Come Away with Me. Produced by Danger Mouse, her newest album has a revitalized, snappy sound, embodied in her single “Happy Pills.” It sounds like it’ll definitely be worth checking out. We, ahem, don’t know why you wouldn’t.

(ALBUM RELEASE) nORAh jOnES - LIttLE BROkEn hEARtSRElEaSE daTE: TUESday, may 1

Everyone’s favorite Hayley Williams collaborator returns for his second full-length. His knack for the catchy hook is evident with single “So Good,” even if it does totally rip off the chorus of Jesse McCartney’s “Shake.” B.o.B is no stranger to guest spots, and this one features Taylor Swift, Lil Wayne, Nicki Minaj and, um, Morgan Freeman.

(ALBUM RELEASE)B.O.B. - StRAngE cLOUdSRElEaSE daTE: TUESday, may 1

We set out to eat, to explore and to investigate whether Shakespeare’s Pizza could be knocked off its throne, if it really is Columbia’s “Taste of the Town,” the crème de la crème, the Italian masterpiece that stands so far above all meager wannabes that it leaves competing grease puddles trembling in its caloric wake.

We ate, we tested, we spent and we can now profess: Shakespeare’s status as Columbia’s top pizza has been MYTH BUSTED.

Amid our Pizza Quest, we used all-meat samples and critiqued individual ingredients, product cohesion, price value and originality.

ShAkESpEARE’S Location: 225 S. Ninth St.

Yes, Shakespeare’s is still the city’s, and perhaps the nation’s, top college hangout, and our rejection of it as Columbia’s best pizza isn’t a refute to the campus hangout award ABC’s “Good Morning, America” recently bestowed upon it.

Nestled north of the J-School on the corner of Ninth and Elm Street, Shakespeare’s offers the convenient location and quirky campus feel that has you coming back for more. The fresh, conveyer-made and freshly-rolled product is also far from something to scoff at. But it’s just not the product that makes your mouth water and leaves a lifetime impression. Not quite like our winner, anyway.

ARRIS' pIzzA Location: 1020 E. Green Meadows Road

For a menu named after Greek gods, this product isn’t so mighty. At this date-like spot near Kohl’s on Grindstone Parkway, we ordered the Hercules (the meat-lover equivalent). It offered a pleasant sauce and decent ingredients but a crust beneath it all that was like toasted cardboard. With small ponds of grease drowning the dish and ingredients that needed super glue to stay attached to the paper-thin crust, Arris didn’t earn our approval. We doubt Olympus would be proud either.

WISE gUyS Location: 7 N. Sixth St.

You can order “The Untouchable,” the behemoth with a 20-inch diameter that comes in a box the size of your kitchen table. We did. And you should.

Wise Guys is nestled near campus on North Sixth Street. You can’t get enough of this pie, well-assembled with fresh toppings in the middle and a crispy, delightful barrier of crust on the outside. The pizza does feature an unequal balance of cheese to sauce, with the former dominating. The value is impeccable and the meat is glorious, but Wise Guys doesn’t precisely scream revolution.

g & d pIzzARIA — WInnERLocation: 2101 W. Broadway

Yes, G & D. As in “Go there now,” and “Dammit, this is really, really good.” This parlor located at a plaza on the corner of Broadway and Stadium Boulevard is our choice as Columbia’s finest, the heir to Shakespeare’s staple status, the town’s true pizza prince.

G & D is another Greek spot, but the similarities to Arris’ stop there. G & D (Good and Delicious, as one manager told us) is more modest, with its meat-lover titled “Country Music.” This circle of steaming cheese-and-meat delight crafts its own type of Columbian pizza, something distinguished from the grease dominating Shakespeare’s or the standard style characterizing Wise Guys.

It’ll enchant you and demand your eyes — even from the waitresses in jean shorts the size of your index finger.

nate atkins | associate editorseth boster | staff writer

PIZZA

Myth: SHaKESPEaRE'S HaS THE BEST PIZZa IN COlUmBIa. chALLEngERS: aRRIS' PIZZa, G & d PIZZZaRIa, WISE GUyS

FROM LEFT: Wise Guys, Arris’, G & D Pizzaria. TOP: Shakespeare's.

To be the best pizza in Columbia, or not to be... NICK EHRHARD | PHOTO EDITOR

04.27.12 • MOVE 5

MOVE HIGHLIGHTS

You might not know Joshua Tillman’s name, but you probably know his music. Formerly the drummer of folk gods Fleet Foxes, Tillman goes his own way with a new moniker. His debut FJM release features a song with the opening line “Pour me another drink and punch me in the face. You can call me Nancy.” So, yeah.

(ALBUM RELEASE)FATHER JOHN MISTY - FEAR FUNRELEASE DATE: TUESDAY, MAY 1

Think Miss Congeniality, but with less twirling and more narco gangsters. This film grabbed nominations at last year’s Cannes Film Festival and the Chicago International Film Festival, so catch it at Ragtag Cinema this weekend to see what you’ve been missing.

(MOVIE RELEASE) MISS BALA RELEASE DATE: FRIDAY, SEPT. 9, 2011

AT RAGTAG: FRIDAY, APRIL 27

Vent out your academic frustrations with Jason Statham as he tries to save a genius 12-year-old from about a bazillion bad guys. We’re not quite sure yet what’s with Hollywood’s fascination with little kids memorizing numbers, but then again, it probably would be useful for that stats final.

(MOVIE RELEASE)SAFEOPENS: FRIDAY, APRIL 27

Ever the college town, Columbia boasts a variety of bars to meet the needs of its inhabitants from all walks of life — the presumed and self-proclaimed “No. 1 Missouri bar” being Harpo’s. But there are also hipster bars, frat bars and townie bars — each with its own

unique culture and established norms. We all know where to go if we’re looking to discuss independent cinema over a $7 beer or where to go to appreciate cheap drink specials and saucy dress codes. But only one Columbia bar stands above them all. Only one can bring together every culture and subculture for a round, a pie and maybe a coin-operated arcade game. That bar is Shakespeare’s Pizza.

HARPO’SLocation: 29 S. Tenth St.

On Thursday through Saturday nights, Harpo’s vibrates with dancing, schmoozing, flirting and liberal imbibing. It has its own established norms and expectations – the higher the heel, the closer to God, being one – and caters to all, but it draws the Greek crowd at a particularly high frequency. The drink of choice seems to be the two-buck Coors Light (its equivalent is the $2 Stag at Ragtag), which isn’t particularly palatable, but its minimal impact to the wallet enables one to down enough to have fun even in a perceived hostile environment. And if Coors Light isn’t your thing, there’s always Shakespeare’s.

SHAKESPEARE’S — WINNERLocation: 225 S. Ninth St.

Shakespeare’s is downtown Columbia’s great equalizer. In the eyes of Shakespeare’s bartenders, no gaggle of sorority sisters takes precedence over a group of famished hula-hoopers or bike polo champions and vice versa. With its cheap and non-pretentious drink menu (read: easy to pronounce and of usually recognizable origin), this bar has likely been at one time a default meeting ground for social groups of all stripes. In a typical night, expect to see a coming-of-age party centered around a birthday girl in a rhinestone tiara nursing a jug of water while mulling over a shot book and skinny-jeaned hipsters wearing neon-colored faux Wayfarers huddled over Stags. Should the party girls find themselves stumbling into Ragtag on a typical Thursday, expect to see some judgmental looks and hushed tones – the same thing that would await the fixed gear enthusiasts should they meander into Bengal’s or Campus Bar and Grill. But at Shakespeare’s? No such thing. You’d be surprised how easy it is to forgive culture-on-culture grudges and long-held resentment when dollar pints and a greasy cheeseboard are on the table (literally and figuratively).

THE HEIDELBERGLocation: 410 S. Ninth St.

A second quasi-equalizer exists in the Heidelberg. Not as intimidating to the non-Greek affiliated as Campus Bar and Grill or Harpo’s, Heidelberg is a uniter and not a divider with the help of a mix of craft brews, old standbys and its incredibly generous happy hour. Two fat- and sodium-laden appetizers for the price of one? Giant pretzels? Bacon and cheddar potato skins? Mile-high chicken nachos? Is this clear to you yet?

T w e l v e years ago, USA Today named B o o c h e s ’ burger one of the 10 best in the nation. But does it live up to the test

in 2012? Or what about the famous ‘Berg — are the burgers there as good as their giant-sized appetizers? Or Flat Branch Pub and Brewery, the favorite spot to take your parents whenever they come to visit? The biggest question: Is it possible to sort out which burger is the best?

Yes. I, the former vegetarian, set out to find out how each restaurant makes a classic cheeseburger, because if you can’t make a delicious American classic, what can you make?

FLAT BRANCH PUB & BREWINGLocation: 115 S. Fifth St.

I was a little curious as to where the 1/2-pound slab of beef on my plate came from. So, I had my own “Portlandia” moment and asked where the cow lived. Instead of getting a name, I found out that it was sourced from Iowa Beef Packers, which is, at least, an American company.

It wasn’t a bad burger. But I didn’t want to eat it until my stomach felt like it was tearing apart at the seams, in the words of a fellow taste-tester, because it wasn’t that good. To balance out

the sheer amount of dead cow on the burger, it needed a lot more cheese. A wimpy slice or two of American cheese doesn’t balance out the burger’s taste and add enough flavor.

Part of the flavor problem stems from the lack of flavor in the actual ground beef. When you end up getting a very traditional cheeseburger, there is very little to mask the taste of beef. Luckily there were bowls of ranch and Flat Branch’s garlic sour cream on the table.

Dip it in the ranch. Just do it. It covers up the charred burger taste. The sour cream is more subdued. Despite the ranch being better, the sour cream still works well with the burger.

Lacking a distinct flavor isn’t always a bad thing, but after eating more than your fair share of burgers just to sort out the top three, you know what you’re looking for. It’s not Flat Branch.


Sometimes burgers are so beautiful and perfect-looking that they look too good to even touch. The cheese is melted just right and the meat is truly cooked: no pink edges. And the fries? Yum.

Let’s talk about the meat-to-cheese ratio. There is so much cheese that it is practically dripping over the edges. Umm, delicious?

It’s super greasy because of the cheese melting all over. This is one of those instances where you actually need every napkin in the vicinity just to send

a quick text. Regardless, the meat is on the dry

side. The cheese does make it less noticeable, but God help you if your first bite is a part without cheese. Avoid that, and it’s a pretty burger.

BOOCHES — WINNERLocation: 110 S. Ninth St.

It isn’t a cute burger, but cuteness isn’t everything. But that’s what I like about Booches: it isn’t a cutesy place to grab a burger. The menu is thrown up on a wall, it’s not well-lit and it’s not the type of place where I can ask the name of the cow my burger came from. When I went in to grab a cheeseburger, I wasn’t expecting much — regardless of what USA Today says.

But it was good. So good. The cheeseburger itself is barely bigger

than my fist, which is my kind of burger (normal-sized people will need to order two). I usually count the presentation as part of the show, but the bun was thrown on, the cheese was sliding off and I wasn’t sure of the patty’s shape (definitely not circular).

Don’t be alarmed by its appearance. It’s exactly what you’ve spent months searching for. The first bite — and every bite after — is chewy goodness. The Swiss cheese adds so much flavor-wise, but the greasiness really comes from the seasoned beef. The extra seasoning sends major points Booches’ way.

Burgers are supposed to be comforting and uncomplicated. Booches’ burger is exactly that.

Welcome to Columbia, home of the good burgersavannah kannberg | senior staff writer

CONFIRMEDBURGER

BAR I’mma buy you a drankkristin torres | senior staff writer

MYTH: HARPO’S IS THE BEST BAR IN COLUMBIA.CHALLENGERS: THE HEIDELBERGSHAKESPEARE’S

MYTH: BOOCHES HAS THE BEST BURGER IN COLUMBIA.CHALLENGERS: FLAT BRANCH THE HEIDELBERG

TOP: Booches, BOTTOM RIGHT: The Heidelberg, BOTTOM LEFT: Flat Branch Pub & Brewing

BRANDON FOSTER | MOVE EDITOR

SAVANNAH KANNBERG | PHOTOGRAPHER

MOVE • 04.27.12 4

MOVE HIGHLIGHTS

Jin’s super-shady dealings in all those episodes of “Lost” will just seem cutesy compared to the latest thriller from Na Hong-jin (“The Chaser”), which follows a Korean-Chinese cab driver’s desperate efforts to pay off debts and join his wife in Seoul.

(MOVIE RELEASE)THE YELLOW SEAOPENS: FRIDAY, DEC. 2, 2011


After releasing Santogold in 2008, Santigold has been M.I.A. for a while. (Not literally. OMG, conspiracy theory!) But it looks like she’s been putting that time to good use. Her latest features help from Diplo, Switch, Karen O and Dave Sitek of TV on the Radio. Also, one of the singles off MOMMB, “Disparate Youth,” is the bomb.

(ALBUM RELEASE) SANTIGOLD - MASTER OF MY MAKE-BELIEVERELEASE DATE: TUESDAY, MAY 1

With a move no one saw coming, St. Louis Cardinals ace pitcher Adam Wainwright decided to quit baseball altogether and release an album aptly titled Out of the Game. Wait, that might be wrong. Ohhh, Rufus Wainwright. Yeah, this guy is releasing his seventh studio album while Adam remains a Cardinal. Hallelujah.

(ALBUM RELEASE)RUFUS WAINWRIGHT - OUT OF THE GAMERELEASE DATE: TUESDAY, MAY 1

lucia lee

NERDS NEED LOVE TOO

video game columnist

There is no doubt that BioWare caused an uproar among fans when it included pay-locked downloadable content on “Mass Effect 3” discs. Although they weren’t the only ones to do this, the idea of DLC is still fairly new, allowing fresh controversies to sprout up every day.

The idea of on-disc DLC is that the developer has physically put the DLC data on the disc and buying the DLC is more like an unlock code instead of an actual download, like the name would suggest.

Epic Games’ design director Cliff Bleszinski is an advocate for developer’s rights to include on-disc DLC. Bleszinski spoke to GameSpot at PAX East, stating on-disc DLC is necessary.

“And often for compatibility issues, (on) day one, some of that content does need to be on-disc,” he says. “It’s an ugly truth of the gaming industry. I’m not the biggest fan of having to do it, but it is one of the unfortunate realities.”

This announcement came after Capcom’s admittance that it produced on-disc “DLC” in the form of 12 characters for its “Street Fighter X Tekken” game. After purchasing the $60 game with a limited number of characters, you have to pay $20 (or 1600 Microsoft points) to access the 12 other characters, some of which are known as staples in the series.

Capcom’s reasoning echoes Bleszinski’s, “Tekken” producer Katsuhiro Harada says.

“It’s Capcom’s business decision, obviously, but I expect the reason they did that was if one player bought a character that another player didn’t have, they would not be able to play against each other online,” Harada says. “Each player needs to have the character data on their disc — if one doesn’t, they would need to download it before each match – and as that includes the character model, the data would be large, increasing the download time,” he says, as Edge reports.

Harada himself claims Tekken would never charge for characters whose move sets “are essential items necessary in the game” and that Tekken “would never sell any of those individually.”

Jimquisition, a podcaster with Escapist Magazine, takes the side of the “peasant” and brought up many of the problems I was having with on-disc DLC.

First and foremost, developers like Bleszinski think on-disc DLC is a “necessary evil,” indicating that developers have to put DLC on discs. As far as I remember, I didn’t have to pay for unlockable disc content with the PlayStation 2; I simply had to complete ridiculous and random tasks within the game in order to get cool stuff. This is only an issue because developers made it an issue.

And let’s not forget the money issue. In the era before the Internet, developers had the typical “complete quest A without taking damage and earn a new character skin” challenges. The thrill of being a completionist for content is being taken away by the greed of developers who want to make you pay for the content you used to get for free. It’s like making someone pay for a freemium game and then making them pay even more for the add-ons that actually make the game worthwhile.

Everyone likes the occasional topical extras or expansion packs that extend the life of a game, but now essential game content is gated off until you pay for a code to unlock the data on the disc. In the words of Jimquisition, “If you’re only making a game with the intent to sell extra content, get into the growing free-to-play market or fuck off.”

From DLC to DLdoneThe term DLC begins to lose its meaning when developers store pay-locked content data on game discs.

mexican

sandwich

We’re bringing Mexi back

SUB SHOP Location: 209 S. 8th St.

Immortalized by Columbia filmmakers in the love letter to college that is “Box Elder,” Sub Shop lays claim to the title of best sandwich joint in Columbia for all the right reasons. And that’s saying something: Downtown Columbia, after all, is a figurative minefield of potential purveyors of your next sandwich. Quality products and attention to detail, though, are what put Sub Shop on top as the obvious superior sandwich.

First, there’s the weird and unexplained aesthetic of the premises. Psychedelic, fantasy-like wall paintings, Woodstock-inspired decorations and a very telling Ramones “Rocket to Russia” poster on the booze refrigerator under a banner reading “TAKE HERE A COLD BEER” give Sub Shop a personality unmatched by those chain restaurants offering anemic, haphazardly constructed assembly-line subs. Expect to wait 10 minutes or more for your made-just-for-you sammy, but it will be worth it. Sub Shop uses thick, generous cuts of meat, cheese and veggie toppings that are as edible as they are identifiable. The off-brand bags of chips for sale are veritable troughs of salty, starchy goodness — cheaper than the big brands offered at other places, yet provides seemingly endless

handfuls. Tangentially, they remain the only shop that has ever delivered me a sub at 9:30 in the morning. Your move, Subway.

PICKLEMAN’S Location: 1106 E. Broadway

Though a chain, I felt it necessary to include Pickleman’s because of the vehement, militant loyalty for the Midwestern chain that this uninitiated Californian observed upon moving to Columbia. People here seem to really value their Pickleman’s, and for understandable reason. With Pickleman’s, nostalgic meals are available should the craving for Mom’s grilled cheese and tomato soup strike you from the comfort of your East Campus apartment. Whether you get it in-store or from the delivery guy, Pickleman’s sandwiches are traditionally piled high with toppings and veggies, putting to shame even fellow chains with certified sandwich artists. Throw in a chocolate chip cookie, too, because after all, you only live once.

WHICH WICH Location: 304 S. 9th St.

At the beginning of this article, I tried

to sound like a bleeding-heart independent sandwich shop purist, but Columbia is fortunate enough to have a Which Wich. Miss your alarm clock again and wake up at 3 p.m. pining for an eggy breakfast sandwich? Which Wich has you covered, especially if you couldn’t decide between a breakfast sammy or huevos rancheros. An obsessive Elvis fan catering a death anniversary séance and need to feed your guests? They’ve got you and your weirdo friends covered, too, with the King’s favorite banana, peanut butter, bacon and honey sandwich. Not to mention the time-honored tradition of doodling on your sandwich bag and seeing it run down the line as the sandwich assemblers put together your sub. Sure, Which Wich is a chain, but it manages to retain some soul with its quirky offerings – although it’s still no Sub Shop.

kristin torres | senior staff writer

The best things between sliced bread

MYTH: SUB SHOP HAS THE BEST SANDWICH IN COLUMBIA.CHALLENGERS: PICKLEMAN'S, WHICH WICH

Vamos a escribir este artículo completamente en español. ¿Bueno?

Fine… (Guess we really aren’t gonna use all those years of high school Spanish.)

If you love El Rancho, there’s a good chance you know exactly why you love El Rancho. And it probably has something to do with “mucha cerveza” and “tres in the morning.” But what about all those other restaurantes? MOVE lets some other local Mexican joints throw their sombreros in the ring. (Pardon us for excluding Chipotle, but its Mexican heritage is questionable and we know you’re just gonna eat there anyway.)

EL RANCHOLocation: 1014 E. Broadway

All right. You know what this place tastes like when you’re hammered, but what’s it taste like before you pound all those Coronas? Pretty great, actually. The servings are muy grande, and every last bite is delicioso. Plus, the employees are amazing, if you think about all they have to put up with. Long story short: El Rancho is the one thing you are right about when you’re drunk. But let’s see how it stands up to competition…

LA SIESTALocation: 33 N. Ninth St.

If you’ve never ventured far enough down Ninth to try La Siesta, you’re not missing out on too much. Your typical Mexican restaurant, La Siesta is more legit than a Taco Bell, but not as satisfying as an El Rancho. Although, we've heard they have some pretty great margaritas if you’re so inclined. But other than that, its name is pretty appropriate, because this one’s a snooze.

BAJA GRILLLocation: Bingham Commons

Not really sure how Mexican this place really is. Although, the huevos rancheros and tilapia tacos are worth a taste. However, when the best thing on a Mexican eatery’s menu is its double chocolate chip cookies, that’s all you really need to know. Then why are we including it? Why do you continue to use your meal points to eat it?

TAQUERIA EL RODEO — WINNERLocation: 808 E. Nifong Blvd.

When it comes to Mexican food, we care more about taste than authenticity. Luckily, Taqueria El Rodeo doesn’t make you choose. The

authenticity is hard to ignore: as if the presence of fried ice cream and mole sauce (Pronounced moe-lay. Not related to the rodent.) on the menu weren’t enough evidence for you, this place serves cactus. That’s right, mother-freaking cactus. The spikes aren’t included, but we’re pretty sure you deserve to have some slipped into your enchilada if you question this place’s authenticity. Hell, it’s even located right next to an El Maguey (just down the road from Wal-Mart on Grindstone), as if it were like, “Come at me, El Maguey. We know who’s got the real Mexican food.” Now, we’re not saying you should drive here next time you’re hammered instead of walking to El Rancho, but jeez, you should at least try to convince STRIPES you live there or something.

brandon foster | MOVE editordelia cai | reporterMYTH: EL RANCHO HAS THE BEST

MEXICAN FOOD IN COLUMBIA.CHALLENGERS: BAJA GRILL, LA SIESTA, TAQUERIA EL RODEO

TOP: Burrito from El Rancho



04.27.12 • MOVE 5

MOVE HIGHLIGHTS

You might not know Joshua Tillman’s name, but you probably know his music. Formerly the drummer of folk gods Fleet Foxes, Tillman goes his own way with a new moniker. His debut FJM release features a song with the opening line “Pour me another drink and punch me in the face. You can call me Nancy.” So, yeah.

(ALBUM RELEASE)FATHER JOHN MISTY - FEAR FUNRELEASE DATE: TUESDAY, MAY 1

Think Miss Congeniality, but with less twirling and more narco gangsters. This film grabbed nominations at last year’s Cannes Film Festival and the Chicago International Film Festival, so catch it at Ragtag Cinema this weekend to see what you’ve been missing.

(MOVIE RELEASE) MISS BALA RELEASE DATE: FRIDAY, SEPT. 9, 2011


Vent out your academic frustrations with Jason Statham as he tries to save a genius 12-year-old from about a bazillion bad guys. We’re not quite sure yet what’s with Hollywood’s fascination with little kids memorizing numbers, but then again, it probably would be useful for that stats final.

(MOVIE RELEASE)SAFEOPENS: FRIDAY, APRIL 27

Ever the college town, Columbia boasts a variety of bars to meet the needs of its inhabitants from all walks of life — the presumed and self-proclaimed “No. 1 Missouri bar” being Harpo’s. But there are also hipster bars, frat bars and townie bars — each with its own

unique culture and established norms. We all know where to go if we’re looking to discuss independent cinema over a $7 beer or where to go to appreciate cheap drink specials and saucy dress codes. But only one Columbia bar stands above them all. Only one can bring together every culture and subculture for a round, a pie and maybe a coin-operated arcade game. That bar is Shakespeare’s Pizza.

HARPO’SLocation: 29 S. Tenth St.

On Thursday through Saturday nights, Harpo’s vibrates with dancing, schmoozing, flirting and liberal imbibing. It has its own established norms and expectations – the higher the heel, the closer to God, being one – and caters to all, but it draws the Greek crowd at a particularly high frequency. The drink of choice seems to be the two-buck Coors Light (its equivalent is the $2 Stag at Ragtag), which isn’t particularly palatable, but its minimal impact to the wallet enables one to down enough to have fun even in a perceived hostile environment. And if Coors Light isn’t your thing, there’s always Shakespeare’s.

SHAKESPEARE’S — WINNERLocation: 225 S. Ninth St.

Shakespeare’s is downtown Columbia’s great equalizer. In the eyes of Shakespeare’s bartenders, no gaggle of sorority sisters takes precedence over a group of famished hula-hoopers or bike polo champions and vice versa. With its cheap and non-pretentious drink menu (read: easy to pronounce and of usually recognizable origin), this bar has likely been at one time a default meeting ground for social groups of all stripes. In a typical night, expect to see a coming-of-age party centered around a birthday girl in a rhinestone tiara nursing a jug of water while mulling over a shot book and skinny-jeaned hipsters wearing neon-colored faux Wayfarers huddled over Stags. Should the party girls find themselves stumbling into Ragtag on a typical Thursday, expect to see some judgmental looks and hushed tones – the same thing that would await the fixed gear enthusiasts should they meander into Bengal’s or Campus Bar and Grill. But at Shakespeare’s? No such thing. You’d be surprised how easy it is to forgive culture-on-culture grudges and long-held resentment when dollar pints and a greasy cheeseboard are on the table (literally and figuratively).


A second quasi-equalizer exists in the Heidelberg. Not as intimidating to the non-Greek affiliated as Campus Bar and Grill or Harpo’s, Heidelberg is a uniter and not a divider with the help of a mix of craft brews, old standbys and its incredibly generous happy hour. Two fat- and sodium-laden appetizers for the price of one? Giant pretzels? Bacon and cheddar potato skins? Mile-high chicken nachos? Is this clear to you yet?

T w e l v e years ago, USA Today named B o o c h e s ’ burger one of the 10 best in the nation. But does it live up to the test

in 2012? Or what about the famous ‘Berg — are the burgers there as good as their giant-sized appetizers? Or Flat Branch Pub and Brewery, the favorite spot to take your parents whenever they come to visit? The biggest question: Is it possible to sort out which burger is the best?

Yes. I, the former vegetarian, set out to find out how each restaurant makes a classic cheeseburger, because if you can’t make a delicious American classic, what can you make?


I was a little curious as to where the 1/2-pound slab of beef on my plate came from. So, I had my own “Portlandia” moment and asked where the cow lived. Instead of getting a name, I found out that it was sourced from Iowa Beef Packers, which is, at least, an American company.

It wasn’t a bad burger. But I didn’t want to eat it until my stomach felt like it was tearing apart at the seams, in the words of a fellow taste-tester, because it wasn’t that good. To balance out

the sheer amount of dead cow on the burger, it needed a lot more cheese. A wimpy slice or two of American cheese doesn’t balance out the burger’s taste and add enough flavor.

Part of the flavor problem stems from the lack of flavor in the actual ground beef. When you end up getting a very traditional cheeseburger, there is very little to mask the taste of beef. Luckily there were bowls of ranch and Flat Branch’s garlic sour cream on the table.

Dip it in the ranch. Just do it. It covers up the charred burger taste. The sour cream is more subdued. Despite the ranch being better, the sour cream still works well with the burger.

Lacking a distinct flavor isn’t always a bad thing, but after eating more than your fair share of burgers just to sort out the top three, you know what you’re looking for. It’s not Flat Branch.


Sometimes burgers are so beautiful and perfect-looking that they look too good to even touch. The cheese is melted just right and the meat is truly cooked: no pink edges. And the fries? Yum.

Let’s talk about the meat-to-cheese ratio. There is so much cheese that it is practically dripping over the edges. Umm, delicious?

It’s super greasy because of the cheese melting all over. This is one of those instances where you actually need every napkin in the vicinity just to send

a quick text. Regardless, the meat is on the dry

side. The cheese does make it less noticeable, but God help you if your first bite is a part without cheese. Avoid that, and it’s a pretty burger.

BOOCHES — WINNERLocation: 110 S. Ninth St.

It isn’t a cute burger, but cuteness isn’t everything. But that’s what I like about Booches: it isn’t a cutesy place to grab a burger. The menu is thrown up on a wall, it’s not well-lit and it’s not the type of place where I can ask the name of the cow my burger came from. When I went in to grab a cheeseburger, I wasn’t expecting much — regardless of what USA Today says.

But it was good. So good. The cheeseburger itself is barely bigger

than my fist, which is my kind of burger (normal-sized people will need to order two). I usually count the presentation as part of the show, but the bun was thrown on, the cheese was sliding off and I wasn’t sure of the patty’s shape (definitely not circular).

Don’t be alarmed by its appearance. It’s exactly what you’ve spent months searching for. The first bite — and every bite after — is chewy goodness. The Swiss cheese adds so much flavor-wise, but the greasiness really comes from the seasoned beef. The extra seasoning sends major points Booches’ way.

Burgers are supposed to be comforting and uncomplicated. Booches’ burger is exactly that.

Welcome to Columbia, home of the good burgersavannah kannberg | senior staff writer

CONFIRMEDBURGER

BAR I’mma buy you a drankkristin torres | senior staff writer

MYTH: HARPO’S IS THE BEST BAR IN COLUMBIA.CHALLENGERS: THE HEIDELBERGSHAKESPEARE’S

MYTH: BOOCHES HAS THE BEST BURGER IN COLUMBIA.CHALLENGERS: FLAT BRANCH THE HEIDELBERG

TOP: Booches, BOTTOM RIGHT: The Heidelberg, BOTTOM LEFT: Flat Branch Pub & Brewing


SAVANNAH KANNBERG | PHOTOGRAPHER

MOVE • 04.27.12 6

We need to talk about 'We Need to Talk About Kevin'

Drew Koch | staff writer

MOVE highlights

Can't wait those six months 'til Halloween? Dress up now and get out to The Blue Note for the screening of this 1975 midnight movie classic starring Tim Curry, Susan Sarandon and Meat Loaf. So get out your newspapers and warm up your Time Warp, but leave your waterguns at home. Part of the cult or not, this should be a fun show.

(EVENT)ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW DATE: MONDAY, APRIL 30

LOCATION: THE BLUE NOTE, 17 N.

NINTH ST.

In this muscleman adaptation of the Shakespearean tragedy, Lord Voldemort lives again! Except now, he's a banished war hero who (shocker) is bent on revenge. You know, some people never change.

(ALBUM RELEASE) CORIOLANUS RELEASE DATE: THURSDAY, DECEMBER

22, 2011


Emily Blunt is going to be all classy and English, and Jason Segal is going to be ridiculously hysterical. Throw in Judd Apatow ("Bridesmaids") as producer, and we're refusing to see any downsides to this.

(ALBUM RELEASE)THE FIVE YEAR ENGAGEMENTRELEASE DATE: FRIDAY, APRIL 27

There’s a moment after the birth of a child when the mother gazes into the eyes of her newborn and forges a connection – a love – that will last two lifetimes. The child might mess up, a little or a lot, somewhere down the road, and the mother might not always be at her most maternal, but this is a love that is indestructible, eternal and auto-matic. That last world is probably the most important. Automatic. This love isn’t something that has to be worked or developed. It’s just there, naturally, from the very begin-ning. Or, it should be. “We Need to Talk About Kevin” is about what happens when it isn’t.

For whatever reason, Eva Khatchadourian and her son Kevin don’t connect, and didn’t even in his infancy. And then, fifteen or so years into his life, he locks a handful of students into his high school gym and shoots them down. Are the two connected? Director Lynne Ramsay, adapting the movie from the acclaimed novel of the same name, isn’t generous enough to answer that question outright, but the sprawling psychological narrative she constructs around it is far more fascinating and enthralling than a straight answer ever could be.

As Eva reels from the upending of her life and tries to reconstruct some semblance of happiness and stability, and as the film flashes back to times before the incident, the viewer is treated to a veritable wonder of visual filmmak-ing. Too few directors these days, I feel, take full advantage of the medium of film as primarily a seen art form – one enjoyed by the eyes – but, luckily, Ramsay is one of those few. And I’m not just talking about making movies that are pretty; I’m talking about movies that are pretty and for a reason. Every single frame of “We Need to Talk About Kevin” suffused with Ramsay’s customarily bold visual style, soaking in meaning and panache.

And for all the visual intrigue, she doesn’t skimp on story either. Avoiding the traditional, point-A-to-point-B, chronological way of ordering events, Ramsay skips around between present and past in a manner more fit to the psychological nature of the narrative. As the guilt-ridden are wont to do, Eva, in her mind, goes back and forth throughout her memory, trying to find all the answers, and where her mind goes, the camera follows. The end product is a thrilling and fascinating, if gloomy, account of, well, almost everything. Guilt, love, redemption, disappoint-ment, regret, anger, courage, rebellion, life and loss.

But even as good as this film is at its core, as strong as its direction and cinematography and script are, I don’t think it could have succeeded without Tilda Swinton in the lead role. This might sound like hyperbole, but it isn’t. Eva is potentially a very unlikable character. A mother who doesn’t love her son. Is there anything more taboo than that? More despicable? And yet, Swinton is able, somehow (don’t ask me how), to make Eva respectable and honest and dignified, if not exactly likable. You might hate some of the things Eva has done, but you don’t hate Eva. And young actor Ezra Miller does very much the same thing with Kevin, who is menacing and acerbic but also charming and intelligent.

Ultimately, I was rendered speechless at the end of “We Need to Talk About Kevin,” and for several reasons. I was rendered almost numb by the subject matter, deep and seri-ous and sobering, and I was also so enamored as to find difficulty verbally expressing my thoughts. You know, now that I think about it, it’s kind of unfairly ironic for a movie whose title demands conversation to be made too perfect for words to describe.

5 OUT OF 5 STARS

THE BLUE NOTE — WINNERLocation: 17 N. Ninth St.

While Columbia occasionally seems to get skipped over for STL, KC or even Lawrence, The Blue Note does get some cool visitors. For instance, the venue cel-ebrated its 30th anniversary with block parties starring Snoop Dogg, Ice Cube and Flaming Lips. Yes, these shows weren’t technically in The Blue Note building, but the street shows are just another cool ele-ment The Note offers. It also offers a nice bar and a reasonably central location. When it comes down to it, though, you’d prob-ably go see your favorite band play in an outhouse if that’s where they were playing. And, more often than not, if your favorite band is coming to Columbia, they’re com-ing to The Blue Note. That’s not to say this

venue actually _s an outhouse. It’s a pretty malleable place: You can mosh if you want to, but you can also have a seat at a table or in the balcony. Also, the size seems to strangely adapt to the size of the show, creating a “wow, I never realized how small this place is” feeling at a tiny show and a “man, _everyone_ is here” feeling at a big one. But again, it’s all about the bands you get, and The Blue Note runs the table in that department.

MOjO’SLocation: 1013 Park Ave.

Columbia is really blessed to have two concert venues that get semi-elite talent, and Mojo’s is the smaller half of that duo. While not as intensely intimate as The Bridge (see below), it still offers the valuable chance to catch decent-sized acts in a small locale. It is a considerable walk from the heart of Columbia, and you might have to wait a while before the main act hits the stage, but

it’s still a pretty great place to catch some certified bands at a reasonable price.

THE BRIdGELocation: 1020 E. Walnut St.

When it comes to intimacy and cool-ness of venue, you really can’t beat The Bridge. The building is also a home to the Columbia Music Academy, which often makes the performances more interactive. For instance, you might see a band play a few acoustic songs intermingled with stories from the road before asking the crowd if anyone wants to come up and jam. Next thing you know, there’s a flautist, trumpeter and a trombone player on stage playing “The Weight” along with members of the headlining band. Its small scale and incon-sistent schedule might prevent The Bridge from topping The Blue Note as the top CoMo venue, but it’s sure a fascinating place that belongs on your Columbia bucket list.

ANdY’S FROzEN CUSTARdLocation: 610 Cooper Drive

As I drove up to the brightly lit Andy’s Frozen Custard stand located about 10 minutes off campus, I was immediately met with a 1950s vibe. The colors, designs and music, combined with the fact that the space is an outdoor-only area, gave it a sort of 1950s authenticity.

In terms of the ice cream, I opted for a classic turtle sundae. Coming from Milwaukee, Wis., where custard is viewed as a sort of god, I had high expectations for the quality of theirs. My expectations were met within the first few bites, and I remained pleased until the end. If you have the transportation and want to try some-thing different, I would definitely recom-mend a trip out to Andy’s Frozen Custard sometime this summer.

SPARKY’S — WINNERLocation: 21 S. Ninth St.

Despite walking past Sparky’s countless times, each time mistaking its dog statue for a real one, I had not yet experienced the famous ice cream. Venturing into Sparky’s is an experience in itself, as the purple walls are completely covered with similarly styled portraits and kid-like landscapes.

After marveling at the walls, I walked up

to the shiny ice cream tubs and saw unique flavors such as chai tea, white Russian, peach lime sorbet and thin mint. I was somewhat overwhelmed by the variety of flavors, each seeming even more delicious than the previous. I finally decided on the white cake batter and within the first licks, I knew that Sparky’s reputation would be upheld in my eyes. Because it was so good, I couldn’t help coming back to try the chai tea flavor. If you haven’t been to Sparky’s yet, I urge you to walk downtown and pick out your own unique flavor. You won’t regret it.

BUCK’S ICE CREAM PLACELocation: 1306 Rollins St.

I was skipping class (ironically, nutrition-al sciences) when I walked into Buck’s Ice Cream Place, tucked inside Eckles Hall. The parlor was small but cute, its walls plastered with posters detailing its rich, 23-year-old history (established in 1989, it’s barely older than I am). After student charging the $1.50 Tiger Stripe cone, I headed to the benches outside the shop to revel in afternoon indulgence.

Since the parlor is only open from noon to 5 p.m., Buck’s is really only a feasible option for people who have wonderful, free schedules — or for people like me, who don’t mind skipping a class or two for no

reason at all. If you can make it there, Buck’s is free (that’s what student charge means, right?) and quality, MU-made ice cream. If not, though, you’d better head downtown for a more traditional ice cream fix.

COLd STONE CREAMERYLocation: 904 Elm St.

Every time I walk into Cold Stone Creamery, I feel a lot like Veruca Salt in the old-school Willy Wonka movie. I want the world — I want the whole world! An entic-ing array of ice cream, sorbet and frozen yogurt lie beneath the surface of the glass. But, at about $4-7 a trip, I would have to pick up a fourth job to start frequenting Cold Stone.

Maybe one day, when I’m a successful professional, I’ll become a Cold Stone regu-lar. Until then, though, hitting the down-town location on Elm Street offers a two-for-one deal every Tuesday.

dylan chapman

REEl tAlK

movie columnist

As summer’s warm weather approaches, so does the thought of ice cream. To help our readers make their choices, we have decided to sink our teeth — or tongues, rather — into several of Columbia’s most well-known ice cream shops. As Sparky’s seems to be the favorite, it'll serve as the staple to which others will be compared.

The dairy bestICE CREAM

VENUEAll bands on deckHere at MOVE, we like to think Columbia is a pretty music-savvy place. And if you think music venue in Columbia, chances are, you think The Blue Note. But should you?

MYTH: SPARKY'S HAS THE BEST ICE CREAM IN COLUMBIA.CHALLENGERS: ANDY'S FROZEN CUSTARD, BUCK'S ICE CREAM, COLD STONE

MYTH: THE BLUE NOTE IS THE BEST CONCERT VENUE IN COLUMBIA.CHALLENGERS: MOJO'S, THE BRIDGE


julia bush & greta weber | staff writers

brandon foster | staff photographer


MOVE • 04.27.12 6

We need to talk about 'We Need to Talk About Kevin'

Drew Koch | staff writer

MOVE highlights

Can't wait those six months 'til Halloween? Dress up now and get out to The Blue Note for the screening of this 1975 midnight movie classic starring Tim Curry, Susan Sarandon and Meat Loaf. So get out your newspapers and warm up your Time Warp, but leave your waterguns at home. Part of the cult or not, this should be a fun show.

(EVENT)ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW DATE: MONDAY, APRIL 30

LOCATION: THE BLUE NOTE, 17 N.

NINTH ST.

In this muscleman adaptation of the Shakespearean tragedy, Lord Voldemort lives again! Except now, he's a banished war hero who (shocker) is bent on revenge. You know, some people never change.

(ALBUM RELEASE) CORIOLANUS RELEASE DATE: THURSDAY, DECEMBER

22, 2011


Emily Blunt is going to be all classy and English, and Jason Segal is going to be ridiculously hysterical. Throw in Judd Apatow ("Bridesmaids") as producer, and we're refusing to see any downsides to this.

(ALBUM RELEASE)THE FIVE YEAR ENGAGEMENTRELEASE DATE: FRIDAY, APRIL 27

There’s a moment after the birth of a child when the mother gazes into the eyes of her newborn and forges a connection – a love – that will last two lifetimes. The child might mess up, a little or a lot, somewhere down the road, and the mother might not always be at her most maternal, but this is a love that is indestructible, eternal and auto-matic. That last world is probably the most important. Automatic. This love isn’t something that has to be worked or developed. It’s just there, naturally, from the very begin-ning. Or, it should be. “We Need to Talk About Kevin” is about what happens when it isn’t.

For whatever reason, Eva Khatchadourian and her son Kevin don’t connect, and didn’t even in his infancy. And then, fifteen or so years into his life, he locks a handful of students into his high school gym and shoots them down. Are the two connected? Director Lynne Ramsay, adapting the movie from the acclaimed novel of the same name, isn’t generous enough to answer that question outright, but the sprawling psychological narrative she constructs around it is far more fascinating and enthralling than a straight answer ever could be.

As Eva reels from the upending of her life and tries to reconstruct some semblance of happiness and stability, and as the film flashes back to times before the incident, the viewer is treated to a veritable wonder of visual filmmak-ing. Too few directors these days, I feel, take full advantage of the medium of film as primarily a seen art form – one enjoyed by the eyes – but, luckily, Ramsay is one of those few. And I’m not just talking about making movies that are pretty; I’m talking about movies that are pretty and for a reason. Every single frame of “We Need to Talk About Kevin” suffused with Ramsay’s customarily bold visual style, soaking in meaning and panache.

And for all the visual intrigue, she doesn’t skimp on story either. Avoiding the traditional, point-A-to-point-B, chronological way of ordering events, Ramsay skips around between present and past in a manner more fit to the psychological nature of the narrative. As the guilt-ridden are wont to do, Eva, in her mind, goes back and forth throughout her memory, trying to find all the answers, and where her mind goes, the camera follows. The end product is a thrilling and fascinating, if gloomy, account of, well, almost everything. Guilt, love, redemption, disappoint-ment, regret, anger, courage, rebellion, life and loss.

But even as good as this film is at its core, as strong as its direction and cinematography and script are, I don’t think it could have succeeded without Tilda Swinton in the lead role. This might sound like hyperbole, but it isn’t. Eva is potentially a very unlikable character. A mother who doesn’t love her son. Is there anything more taboo than that? More despicable? And yet, Swinton is able, somehow (don’t ask me how), to make Eva respectable and honest and dignified, if not exactly likable. You might hate some of the things Eva has done, but you don’t hate Eva. And young actor Ezra Miller does very much the same thing with Kevin, who is menacing and acerbic but also charming and intelligent.

Ultimately, I was rendered speechless at the end of “We Need to Talk About Kevin,” and for several reasons. I was rendered almost numb by the subject matter, deep and seri-ous and sobering, and I was also so enamored as to find difficulty verbally expressing my thoughts. You know, now that I think about it, it’s kind of unfairly ironic for a movie whose title demands conversation to be made too perfect for words to describe.

5 OUT OF 5 STARS

THE BLUE NOTE — WINNERLocation: 17 N. Ninth St.

While Columbia occasionally seems to get skipped over for STL, KC or even Lawrence, The Blue Note does get some cool visitors. For instance, the venue cel-ebrated its 30th anniversary with block parties starring Snoop Dogg, Ice Cube and Flaming Lips. Yes, these shows weren’t technically in The Blue Note building, but the street shows are just another cool ele-ment The Note offers. It also offers a nice bar and a reasonably central location. When it comes down to it, though, you’d prob-ably go see your favorite band play in an outhouse if that’s where they were playing. And, more often than not, if your favorite band is coming to Columbia, they’re com-ing to The Blue Note. That’s not to say this

venue actually _s an outhouse. It’s a pretty malleable place: You can mosh if you want to, but you can also have a seat at a table or in the balcony. Also, the size seems to strangely adapt to the size of the show, creating a “wow, I never realized how small this place is” feeling at a tiny show and a “man, _everyone_ is here” feeling at a big one. But again, it’s all about the bands you get, and The Blue Note runs the table in that department.

MOjO’SLocation: 1013 Park Ave.

Columbia is really blessed to have two concert venues that get semi-elite talent, and Mojo’s is the smaller half of that duo. While not as intensely intimate as The Bridge (see below), it still offers the valuable chance to catch decent-sized acts in a small locale. It is a considerable walk from the heart of Columbia, and you might have to wait a while before the main act hits the stage, but

it’s still a pretty great place to catch some certified bands at a reasonable price.

THE BRIdGELocation: 1020 E. Walnut St.

When it comes to intimacy and cool-ness of venue, you really can’t beat The Bridge. The building is also a home to the Columbia Music Academy, which often makes the performances more interactive. For instance, you might see a band play a few acoustic songs intermingled with stories from the road before asking the crowd if anyone wants to come up and jam. Next thing you know, there’s a flautist, trumpeter and a trombone player on stage playing “The Weight” along with members of the headlining band. Its small scale and incon-sistent schedule might prevent The Bridge from topping The Blue Note as the top CoMo venue, but it’s sure a fascinating place that belongs on your Columbia bucket list.

ANdY’S FROzEN CUSTARdLocation: 610 Cooper Drive

As I drove up to the brightly lit Andy’s Frozen Custard stand located about 10 minutes off campus, I was immediately met with a 1950s vibe. The colors, designs and music, combined with the fact that the space is an outdoor-only area, gave it a sort of 1950s authenticity.

In terms of the ice cream, I opted for a classic turtle sundae. Coming from Milwaukee, Wis., where custard is viewed as a sort of god, I had high expectations for the quality of theirs. My expectations were met within the first few bites, and I remained pleased until the end. If you have the transportation and want to try some-thing different, I would definitely recom-mend a trip out to Andy’s Frozen Custard sometime this summer.

SPARKY’S — WINNERLocation: 21 S. Ninth St.

Despite walking past Sparky’s countless times, each time mistaking its dog statue for a real one, I had not yet experienced the famous ice cream. Venturing into Sparky’s is an experience in itself, as the purple walls are completely covered with similarly styled portraits and kid-like landscapes.

After marveling at the walls, I walked up

to the shiny ice cream tubs and saw unique flavors such as chai tea, white Russian, peach lime sorbet and thin mint. I was somewhat overwhelmed by the variety of flavors, each seeming even more delicious than the previous. I finally decided on the white cake batter and within the first licks, I knew that Sparky’s reputation would be upheld in my eyes. Because it was so good, I couldn’t help coming back to try the chai tea flavor. If you haven’t been to Sparky’s yet, I urge you to walk downtown and pick out your own unique flavor. You won’t regret it.

BUCK’S ICE CREAM PLACELocation: 1306 Rollins St.

I was skipping class (ironically, nutrition-al sciences) when I walked into Buck’s Ice Cream Place, tucked inside Eckles Hall. The parlor was small but cute, its walls plastered with posters detailing its rich, 23-year-old history (established in 1989, it’s barely older than I am). After student charging the $1.50 Tiger Stripe cone, I headed to the benches outside the shop to revel in afternoon indulgence.

Since the parlor is only open from noon to 5 p.m., Buck’s is really only a feasible option for people who have wonderful, free schedules — or for people like me, who don’t mind skipping a class or two for no

reason at all. If you can make it there, Buck’s is free (that’s what student charge means, right?) and quality, MU-made ice cream. If not, though, you’d better head downtown for a more traditional ice cream fix.

COLd STONE CREAMERYLocation: 904 Elm St.

Every time I walk into Cold Stone Creamery, I feel a lot like Veruca Salt in the old-school Willy Wonka movie. I want the world — I want the whole world! An entic-ing array of ice cream, sorbet and frozen yogurt lie beneath the surface of the glass. But, at about $4-7 a trip, I would have to pick up a fourth job to start frequenting Cold Stone.

Maybe one day, when I’m a successful professional, I’ll become a Cold Stone regu-lar. Until then, though, hitting the down-town location on Elm Street offers a two-for-one deal every Tuesday.

dylan chapman

REEl tAlK

movie columnist

As summer’s warm weather approaches, so does the thought of ice cream. To help our readers make their choices, we have decided to sink our teeth — or tongues, rather — into several of Columbia’s most well-known ice cream shops. As Sparky’s seems to be the favorite, it'll serve as the staple to which others will be compared.

The dairy bestICE CREAM

VENUEAll bands on deckHere at MOVE, we like to think Columbia is a pretty music-savvy place. And if you think music venue in Columbia, chances are, you think The Blue Note. But should you?

MYTH: SPARKY'S HAS THE BEST ICE CREAM IN COLUMBIA.CHALLENGERS: ANDY'S FROZEN CUSTARD, BUCK'S ICE CREAM, COLD STONE

MYTH: THE BLUE NOTE IS THE BEST CONCERT VENUE IN COLUMBIA.CHALLENGERS: MOJO'S, THE BRIDGE


julia bush & greta weber | staff writers



04.27.12 • MOVE 7

pop culture columnist

Every time a new show premieres on HBO, there always seems to be controversy following it. Whether it’s the excessive nudity and incest in “Game of Thrones,” the kinky vampire sex in “True Blood” or the polygamous and religious themes in “Big Love,” the network never shies away from pushing the envelope.

The new comedy “Girls” contains what you would expect from an HBO show: frank sexual dialogue, quirky and true-to-life characters and themes that resonate to the current political climate. But the show has also been under fire for racism and unlikeable leads, two criticisms I absolutely do not agree with.

Many critics have taken offense that while the show takes place in the very racially diverse Brooklyn, the four lead girls are all white. I’m all for seeing people of all different colors and backgrounds on TV, but it’s not by any means racist to not feature other ethnic groups in any particular show. Sure, times are changing, but I feel that for the most part, people hang out with people of their same race. There are always exceptions. I have friends from all walks of life and racial groups. But friends are friends for a very simple reason: they have something in common.

The girls of “Girls” are all extremely flawed individuals. You don’t see any of them for their race, but rather their personalities and quirks. It’s almost the anti “Sex and the City.” It shows the reality of being a young woman in New York. Problems include finding money to pay for rent, not for Manolos.

“Girls,” created by and starring the extremely talented Lena Dunham, follows the lives of four recent college graduates trying to navigate the real world without the financial help of their parents. In the pilot, Dunham’s character, Hannah, tells her mom and dad, “I think I may be the voice of my generation. Well, the voice of a generation.” I think she’s right. This show gives a voice to a generation that has largely been ignored in the entertainment world: the generation of spoiled, rich, white kids with a delusional sense of entitlement. I belong to this group, and most of my friends do as well.

The Twitter hashtag #firstworldproblems has been common for years. Every weekend my friends strive to get “white girl wasted.” And just like the characters in “Girls,” we are going to be in a rude awakening when college ends and we have to try to make it on our own.

For a comedy, “Girls” is not afraid to address some very dark, real problems that young girls face. In the second episode, one of the characters, Jessa, scheduled an abortion. Other topics in the episode included the fear of getting STDs and being a 23-year-old virgin. There are definitely laughs to be had, but it comes from a sense of familiarity. You know these girls, you go to school with these girls, these girls are some of your best friends.

Critics will always find something to complain about. Controversy is only invented by people with too much time on their hands. I strongly recommend giving “Girls” a chance. I promise you won’t find any racism. And sure, the characters might have their unlikeable moments, but that comes with the territory of speaking for our generation.

DAY BY DAYVIDdavid adams

T h e b e a u t i f u l thing about a Midwestern college town is all of the unique places that come along with it. Res t auran t s a re no

exception. Here, it's hard to find a restaurant that's unsatisfying, but there are some that stand above the others. Flat Branch Pub & Brewing is generally considered the essential to take your parents (and their wallets) to when they’re in town, but are there better options?


How could we write a piece on Columbia restaurants without mentioning Flat Branch? With a varied menu and, for those a little older, beer selection, it's hard to go wrong here. The only downside: there's always a ridiculous wait. Expect to wait more than an hour to be seated during peak times, but you won’t regret it.

ADDISON’S – WINNERLocation: 709 Cherry St.

For any boy reading this,

Addison’s is the perfect first date restaurant. It's just casual enough but with a very classy touch. The food is absolutely fantastic, and though it's hard not to find it completely full on weekends, it’s worth the wait. And guys, you will charm the hell out of any girl you take here. Even if you need to get a second job to do it.

ANTHONY’S ITALIAN RESTAURANTLocation: 700 E. Broadway

This is far less known than Addison’s and Flat Branch, and there's hardly ever a wait, but Anthony's has some of the best Italian food in Columbia. Discovered by accident when, ironically, Flat Branch had too long of a wait, this Broadway gem has the most delicious, unique pizza created with sweet sauce. Anthony’s has a very quaint atmosphere, and every time I go in, I am welcomed with open arms.

QUINTON’SLocation: 124 S. Ninth St.

Quinton’s is a perfect restaurant for a nice spring day and has one of the best views of downtown. During the warmer months, Quinton’s opens its rooftop patio that is both relaxing and entertaining. The service and food are both great, but even

the atmosphere alone is worth checking out. BLEU RESTAURANT AND WINE BARLocation: 811 E. Walnut St.

Recently relocated two blocks north to East Walnut Street, Bleu has the same incredible food that Columbia has come to love, just in a different space. A classy yet casual restaurant, Bleu is known for both its dinner selection and brunch during the weekends. The most outstanding item on the menu is the macaroni and cheese. Mixed with thick-cut bacon, you'll never want your meal to end.

MURRY’SLocation: 3107 Green Meadows Way

A bit outside of downtown, Murry’s is located on South Providence Road near Nifong Boulevard. This food seems like it would be some of the most expensive in Columbia, but the prices are surprising. In a good way. Another perfect date restaurant, it is dimly lit and has the most fantastic steak sandwiches in Columbia.

We could write on and on about the many other incredible restaurants Columbia has to offer. These six are just a few of our favorites. Thank God for the Rec.

S o m e b o d y s o m e w h e r e at some time (no one seems to know the specifics) said that baseball is America’s favor-

ite pastime. But I scoff at that. Clearly, movies are! We bond over them, we judge people over them. We watch them to cheer us up, to inspire us, to make us laugh, to make us cry. And as much as the budding film scholar in me wants to say something smart-sounding about how a film is a film and the environment in which it is viewed shouldn’t matter, and it should be judged by its own merits, and so on… No. A movie-watching environ-ment does matter! A good theater or a bad one can drastically affect one’s opinion of a film, and so I offer this, a brief rundown and review of the movie theater scene her in our very own Columbia.

RAGTAG CINEMA — WINNERLocation: 10 Hitt St.

I’ll just admit at the start of this that I’m on the record as calling Ragtag

my “favorite place in the universe.” Sure, that makes me biased, but it also makes me an expert! Let me list all the reasons why Ragtag is just absolutely delightful. First of all, duh, the movies. Depending on your cinematic tastes, the film selection at Ragtag can be a huge plus, a meh, or a huge minus. I understand that a majority of college students would rather take a three-hour biology final than sit through something like “Meek’s Cutoff,” and I don’t fault them for it. But, for me, Ragtag’s playing of movies that usually only appear in theaters in big cities like New York or L.A. is a godsend. No longer do I have to wait for expen-sive DVDs of indie and foreign fare. And beyond the film selection, Ragtag excels in pretty much every other pos-sible facet. The food should be seri-ously considered in any conversation about Columbia’s best restaurants, and you can even bring it into the theater, along with any alcoholic beverage of your choice! And you get to sit in comfy couches! And before each film, a hipster (the best kind, I promise) projectionist comes to the front to tell you how awesome the movie you’re about to see is! And the theater is con-

nected to 9th Street Video, which is awesome, and has the widest selection of movies for rental in the entire state! I could go on here for pages. Basically, go. Go soon, and go often.

HOLLYWOOD – STADIUM 14Location: 2800 Goodwin Pointe

Did you know that the number after a movie theater’s name is how many individual theaters it has? Well, until about a month ago, I didn’t. Looking back, I don’t know how something so glaringly obvious never registered with me for over nineteen years, but, whatever. I also thought "epitome" was pronounced “eppie-tohm” for, like, the longest time. What I’m getting at here is that the ‘14’ up there after ‘Stadium’ means that this is going to be the Columbia theater with the most options. If you’re the type of person who drives to the theater with-out a movie in mind to spontaneously choose one upon arrival, then this is the place for you. This is also the place for you if you’re the type of per-son who prefers arcades on balconies, who delights in those weirdly lifeless promotional movie cardboard cutout things (they’re everywhere!), and/or

who feels like $5.50 is a fair price for a bottle of water. If you aren’t any of those types of people, then you might want to go somewhere else.

GOODRICH FORUM 8Location: 1209 Forum Katy Parkway

What is there to say about Goodrich Forum 8? Not much! It’s pretty generic as far as generic movie theaters go. It sells popcorn and candy at insulting prices, it has acne-cursed teens standing awkwardly and ripping your ticket stubs, and it smells exactly

like what you would expect it to smell like. In fact, everything at Forum is what you would expect it to be (except maybe for its bizarro location behind Schnucks), and that can be boring, yes, but also comforting. Sometimes you want that movie theater experience, the one that reminds your childhood and the first time you saw Shrek, and this is the place to get that. Oh, also, one time I saw a pseudo-celebrity former Real World cast member there. So there’s that!

But really, just go to Ragtag.

White ‘Girls’ may be truer to life than you’d think

RESTAURANTkristen herhold | senior staff writer

Chews your own adventureMYTH:FLAT BRANCH IS THE BEST RESTAURANT IN COLUMBIA.CHALLENGERS:ADDISON'S ANTHONY'S QUINTON'SBLEUMURRY'S

theaterdylan chapman | movie columnist

Get your popcorn ready, it's about to go down

MYTH:RAGTAG IS THE BEST MOVIE THEATER IN COLUMBIA.CHALLENGERS:STADIUM 14FORUM 8



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MOVE — ISSUE 28