Upload
michelle-versales
View
273
Download
0
Embed Size (px)
Citation preview
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
1/23
ACADEMIC WRITING TASK 1
Question 1:
You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.
The table below gives information about changes in modes of travel in England between
1985 and 2000.
Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make
comparisons where relevant.
Write at least 150 words.
Average distance in miles travelled per person per year, by mode of travel
1985 2000
Walking 255 237
Bicycle 51 41
Car 3,199 4,806
Local bus 429 274
Long distance bus 54 124Train 289 366
Taxi 13 42
Other 450 585
All modes 4,740 6,475
Sample Answer:
In 2000 the most preferred mode of travel is by car with 4, 806 people. There s a
noticable decrease in public transportation locally where it dropped from 429 people in 1985 to
274 people in 2000. However the long distance bus rides is much more preferred by people as its
figures are more than doubled in the last 15 years. People who chose to walk or cycle are
decreased slightly in 2000 which probably made people to take the train more often. Theres a
significant increase in the numbers of people who travelled by train. It jumped from 289 in 1985
to 366 in 2000. This makes the train second popular mode of transportation. Thi biggest leap in
the chart is the increase of taxi users who are tripled in 2000 with 42 people where it was only 13
in 1985
Apart from all this modes of travel, there are some more different types of travel as well
of course. Number of people choosing different modes of travel is rapidly increased from 450 to585 in 2000.
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
2/23
Comments:
Question 2:
You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.
The charts below give information about travel to and from the UK, and about the most
popular countries for UK residents to visit.
Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make
comparisons where relevant.
Write at least 150 words.
Visits to and from the UK
This is an answer written by a candidate who achieved a Band 6 score. Here is the
examiners comment:
This answer does not introduce the information in the table, nor does it report it
accurately. The figures are misinterpreted as representing the number of people rather than
the average number of miles travelled person per year. Consequently the information about
the increase in total travel is simply not mentioned, so not all key information is covered.
There is an attempt to summarize trends in the in the figures, but the reader cannot get a
clear overall picture of the information because of the fundamental confusion.
Nevertheless, the information is organized and the writing flows quite well because
of good use of referencing and other connectors, but there are occasional errors in these
and the links between ideas are slightly confusing at times.
The strong feature in this answer is the range of vocabulary which is used with
some flexibility and good control. A good range of structures is also used, but there are still
some fairly basic mistakes, such as in the choice of tense, subject/ verb agreement and
inappropriate use of the passive.
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
3/23
Most popular countries visited by UK residents 1999
Sample Answer:
The graphs reveal an information about overseas residents travel to UK and UK residents
travel to UK and UK residents travel to other countries, and where they visited more.
According to the chart of visits to and from UK, UK residents had visited abroad more
than overseas residents visited UK. UK residents travelling were increased slightly till 1986, after
that, there was a dramatic rise from & dollar; 20 millions to & dollar; 54 millions till 1999. Incontrast, overseas residents were increased gradually in travelling to UK from & dollar; 10 million
to & dollar ; 28 millions between 1979 and 1999.
From the information shown, we can see that France was the most popular country
visited by UK residents, accounting for & dollar; 11 millions. And the others countries visited but
UK residents were Turkey, Greece and USA, which were & dollar; 4 and & dollar; 5 millions.
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
4/23
Comment:
This is an answer written b y a candidate who achieved a Band 5 score. Here is the examiners
comment:The response is under-length(138 words). The candidate reports the key information
in the first graph i.e. that visits to and from the UK increased and that the increase in visits
from the UK was more marked than that of visits to the country. In the bar chart the
information is also reported accurately. However, the references to & dollar are confusing,
suggesting that the candidate has not fully understood the information given, and there is a
little attempt to relate the two diagrams or to make comparisons across the information given.
There is a brief introduction to the topic, with an attempt to paraphrase the rubric;; the
overall structure of the writing is clear, with some use of the basic discourse markers. There is
very little use of reference, however, resulting in a considerable amount of repetition of key
vocabulary. There is a fairly narrow range of sentence types and errors occur in a verb
formation and in the use of tenses.
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
5/23
Question 3:
You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.
The table below gives information about the underground railway systems in six cities.
Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make
comparisons where relevant.
Write at least 150 words.
Underground Railway Systems
City Date opened Kilometers of route
`
Passengers per year
(in millions)
London 1863 394 775
Paris 1900 199 1191
Tokyo 1927 155 1927
Washington DC 1976 126 144
Kyoto 1981 11 45
Los Angeles 2001 28 50
Sample Answer:
The table shows the details regarding the underground railway systems in six cities.
London has the oldest underground railway systems in six cities.
London has the oldest underground railway systems among the six cities. It was opened
in the year 1863, and it is already 140 years old. Paris is the second oldest, in which it was
opened in the year 1900. This was then followed by the opening of the railway systems in Tokyo,
Washington DC and Kyoto. Los Angeles has the newest underground railway system, London, for
certain, has the largest underground railway systems. It has 394 kilometers of route in total, which
is nearly twice as large as the system in Paris. Kyoto, in contrast, has the smallest system. It only
has 11 kilometers of route, which is more than 30 times less than that of London.
Interestingly, Tokyo, which is only has 155 kilometers of route, serves the greatest number
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
6/23
of passengers per year, at 1927 millions of passengers. The system in Paris has the second
greatest number of passengers, at 11911 millions passengers per year. The smalest underground
railway system, Kyoto, serves the smallest number of passengers per year as predicted.
In conclusion, the underground railway systems in different cities vary a lot in the size of
the system, the number of passengers served per year and in the age of the system.
Comment:
ACADEMIC WRITING TASK 2
This is an answer written by a candidate who achieved a Band 7 score. Here is the
examiners comment:
This answer selects and describes the information well. Key features are clearly
identified, while unexpected differences are highlighted and illustrated. The answer is
relevant and accurate with a clear overview.
Information is well-organized using a good range of signals and link words.
These are generally accurate and appropriate, although occasional inaccuracies and there
is some repetition. Grammar is well-controlled and sentences are varied and generally
accurate with only minor errors.
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
7/23
QUESTION 1:
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Present w written argument or cause to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the
following topic.
Improvements in health, education and trade are essential for the development of
poorer nations. However, the governments of richer nations should take more
responsibility for helping the poorer nation in such areas.
To what extent do you agree or disagree or disagree with thisopinion?
You should user your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with
examples and relevant evidence.
Sample Answer:
In balancing the world economic growth, the underdevelopment of the Third World
Nations have been drawn to the attention of the developed countries of the Western. Thu,
government policies and interference in the agricultural business of the poorer nations were made
to secure their dominant source of the economy. Many discussions among economist and
politicians also put their focus on the other aspects. That is, to improve the health, education and
trade for the developing countries. However, the improvements cannot be made by these
countries, but more external assistance and aids should be done.
Because of the shortage of fool supply, the people in poorer nation (i.e. Africa) are easily
prone to disease, hunger and death. When natural environment disasters happen, they are
threaten with their lives. Education cannot be well developed as a result of frequent droughts,
famines and disease spreading. The other countries while emphasizing on the development of
agriculture in the Third world, cannot really give the solution to the cyclical problem which has
been existing for a long time. It is time to consider the consequences of all the waste of efforts in
trying to help the economic growth of the Third World and to think from the other perspectives.
The richer countries have the power to rebuilt the Third World by taking care the essential-health,
education and trade. More aids for providing the medicine, educational needs and materials can
be done by the richer countries. The assistance of trade and developing business in the poorer
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
8/23
countries also can be of a great help to the poorer nations.
If the richer countries can be more serious about the essential issues of how a nation
develops, and well consider the special situations and circumstances those poorer nations are
facing, the improvement will be more efficiently made. The governments of developed countriesare, in some ways, responsible-though not obliged-for the future of those developing countries.
Comment:
QUESTION 2.
B. You should spend 40 minutes on this task.
Present a written argument or case to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the
following topic:
Popular events like the football World Cup and other International sporting
occasions are essential in easing international tensions and releasing patriotic
emotion in a safe way.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
You should user your own ideas, knowledge and experiences and support your arguments with
examples and relevant evidence.
You should write at least 250 words?
Sample Answer:
I DISAGREE.
The writer expresses a point of view, bit the ideas show little development and the argument
does not go anywhere. The writing is well-organised, however, can be followed with little
difficulty. Sentence structures are sufficiently varied, but grammatical and lexical control is quite
often faulty.
(e.g. subject/verb agreement, incorrect use of tense, mass/count nouns.)
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
9/23
Nowadays, football is the most popular fame in the world. We can find there are many
different teams who plays this football. There are dividing into 3 division: division one, division
two and division three. Each divisions have different skills, There skill that they have are depend
on the manager. He is the one who teachs the player how to play. By playing football, there aremany advantages and disadvantages. Firstly, the team can earn a lot of money. If we compare the
income in division one and division two are really different. The division one will get more that
division two. Because as we know the team in division one, they shows to the people that they
are able to play better than the others. For example: David Beckham (the player of Manchester
United). He can earn for about 45.000, 50.000/ week. Its unbelievable. Even the prime
minster in the UK just got for about 110.000/year. Secondly, they can get a lot of spectators
which makes the income increase. In one match, they can earn for about 20 or 30 million
pounds. Actually, its really high. For one ticket (VIP) it can cost us a lot of money. I think for
about 100 or over. That is for one person. How if we count for a million person? There are also
many disadvantages: like from the task which says that the releasing patriotic emotion in a safe
way. Actually \, I dont really agree about that: like 2 weeks or 3 weeks ago, there are 2 fans of
Leeds united got shots. And it makes them died. Many people come and give them flowers and
also the clothes which shown they re sad about that.
There are other sport games like tennis. Tennis is also popular. In playing tennis there are
also have advantages and disadvantages. This games shows how they against each other. The
advantages are can earn a lot of money, can attract the spectators (audience). There are also have
disadvantages of this game. For example: two years ago, when Monica Sales and Steffi Graph areon the match. They play against each other then, one of the Steffis fan cant stand anymore, he
killed (shots) Monica Sales. That makes Monica Sales have to stop the game. The people are
thinking to take her to the hospital. Because of that, it makes Monica Sales stopped from playing
tennis for about a year. But now, she has started again.
In my opinion, these sport can ease the international tensions and also can make death
from year to year become increase. So, it is very dangerous.
COMMENT:
This is an answer written by a candidate who achieved a Band 4 score. Here is the examiner s
comment:
The majority of this answer has no relation to the task set; the first half is completely
irrelevant and the second part is only marginally related to the topic. The candidate has therefore
been penalised for this. There is little meaningful message, and grammatical control is weak.
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
10/23
QUESTION 3:
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Write about the following topic
Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged.
Others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete
become more useful adults.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or
experience.
Write a least 250 words.
SAMPLE ANSWER:
Nowadays, purpose of education being changed in Korea. There are some people think
that competition in children should be made, also others believe that children who are taught to
co-operate as well as become more useful adults. There are advantages and disadvantages for
both of the arguments.
To begin with, what I good if a sense of competition in children is made? They could
develop themselves more and more as they learn and study a lot to win from the competition. To
prove this, in Korea, it is popular-even common now to have a tutor who come to students
house to teach extra pieces of study with paying a lot of money. They learn faster than what they
learn at school. Furthermore, during vacations, students study abroad to learn English for a month
instead or revise school work. If they have experiments such as study abroad, it I one the greatest
plus point to go to the famous well-known highschool. Moreover, there are four big school exam
and two national examinations to test students level of studies. Generally, only the highest 40%
can go to the good quality highschools and colleges. Children learn as much as they can, to win
the competition to obtain good quality school.
On the other hand, as they are busy to enter the school and study individually with their
own tutors, there are problems. They become selfish. They become careless and don t help others
a lot if it is about studies. There will e no co-operations for them. Then, why are weak parts and
strong parts for each person. To co-operate is to improve this part. People talk and listen to what
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
11/23
others thinking of and learn. That could also be a great opportunity to learn instead of learning
alone with one teacher.
In conclusion, I strongly agree with that children should be taught to co-operate rather
than compete. Nobody is perfect. People learn together, work together to develop each other.Therefore, I want parents and teachers to educate children concentrating on co-operation, not
compete and raking them.
COMMEMTS:
This is an answer written by a candidate who achieved a Band 6 score. Here is the examiner
comment:
Although the answer considers the main issues in the question, it deals much more with the
aspect of competition than it does with co-operation. Some of the supporting examples are
overdeveloped and divert the reader away from the argument. However, the main points are relevant
and the writer s point of view is generally clear.
The argument has a logical progression and there is some good use of linking expressions,
though the use of rhetorical questions to signal topic changes is not very skilful. There are also
examples of overusing markers, and of errors in referencing.
The candidate tries to use a range of language, but there are regular errors in words choiceand word form, and this occasionally causes problems for the reader. Similarly, a range of structure is
attempted, but not always with good control of punctuation or grammar. However the meaning is
generally clear.
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
12/23
General Writing Task 1
Question 1:
You and your family are living in rented accommodation in an English-speaking country.
You are not satisfied with the condition of some of the furniture.
Write a letter to the landlord. In your letter
Introduce yourself explain what is wrong with the furniture say what action you would like the landlord to take
Write at least 150 words.
You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Begin your letter as follows:
Dear.,
SAMPLE ANSWER:
Dear neighbor,
I am your new neigbour, I moved in Last week with my son, I am working as a nurse in
the nearby hospital. I am planning to hold a party, I will invite all my friends and relatives,
my son also will invite his friends and relatives, my son also will invite his friends I would
like to invite yu too, I will be happy to see you.
At the party I will provide all kind of drinks, different type of food. I will prepare
intercontinental dishes as well as some Arabic food, in addition I will also get some Indian
and Chinese food, I will order them from the restaurant, so we will have planty of food
and drinks, we will also listen to some music and I will introduced you to all of my ferinds,
also who ever likes to dance they can. I hope everyone will enjoy the party and have fun
including you.
If you decided not to come for any reason, please inform me, and I want to be sure that
the noise will not disturb you.
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
13/23
Looking forward to see you, as this will not disturb you.
Looking forward to see you, as this party gives both of us the opportunity to be goodfriends.
Yours faithfully,
Mahir
Comment:
This is an answer written by a candidate who achieved a Band 6 score. Here is theexaminers comment:
The letter has a clear purpose and all the information required in the task is
provided and well-extended by the writer. The tone is consistently informal and
friendly, which suits the situation. The closing expression is over-formal adds an
appropriate tone, but this is only a minimal lapse in the whole response.
The information is generally organized throughout the letter, but while there
are one or two examples of good linking, there is a lot of omission, and also is used
rather repetitively. As a result, sentences are not fluently linked and this limits the
rating.
Vocabulary is adequate and appropriate for the task although the range is
not wide. The level of control is generally good with only a few spelling mistakes. The
range of structures is limited and repetitive, however. There are one or two examples
of complex structures used as well, but overall there are lots of simple clauses that
have inaccurate punctuation. This is a weak point of this answer.
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
14/23
Question 2:
You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.
You were hurt in a minor accident inside a supermarket, and you wish to complain to the
supermarket, and you wish to complain to the supermarket.
Write a letter to the manager of the supermarket In your letter
say who you are give details about the accident suggest how the supermarket could prevent similar accidents.
Write at least 150 words.
You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Begin your letter as follows:
Dear Sir or Madam,
Sample Answer:
Dear Sir or Madam,
my name is Liam Test, im the student that got hurt in the accident in front of your row of bean-
tins in your supermarket. Let me give you some details about the accident first. I was just going
around the corner from the vegetables to beans when a pregnant woman crashed into me with
her shopping cart. It was impossible to see each other before the accident because this special
corner is very dark and the lights didnt even work, probably because the eight bulbs were old
and didnt serve anymore. Anyway, the floor was very slippery and wet because the rain was
dripping through the non-waterproof ceiling, so I slipped, fell, and knocked myself out on the
bean-tins. I list consciousness. Your insurance payed for the accidents in your supermarket: make
sure your ceiling is fixed and the floor is dry. You could also arrange your rows in a way that
makes it possible for your customers to take care of each other. Always get the lights checked at
leas once a week, and change damaged lightbulbs immediately. This would help making our
supermarket a safer place.
Sincerely yours,
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
15/23
Comment:
This is an answer written by a candidate who achieved a Band 7 score. Here is the
examiners comment.
This is a well-developed response to the task prompt. The letter has a clear
purpose, it is written in an appropriate style and it gives all the information required by
the bullet points. The situation is described in a relevant way and the letter
communicates effectively and fluently.
The information in the letter is organized, but there are no paragraphs so the
reader has to work harder to follow the changes from one topic to the next and in some
cases the links between sentences could be improved.
A good range of vocabulary is used accurately, including idiomatic expressions.
But some words are not well chosen so there are also awkward expressions that do notsound natural, and there are several examples of these.
The writing includes a good range of grammatical structures which are usually
used accurately. There are a few errors in grammar, and the first sentence lacks capital
letters, which is a rather basic mistake.
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
16/23
Question 3:You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.
You are unhappy about a plan to make your local airport bigger and increase the number of
flights. You live near the airport.
Write a letter to your local newspaper. In your letter
explain where you live describe the problem give reasons why you do not want this development.
You should write at least 150 words.
You do NOT need to write your own address.
Begin your letter as follows:
Dear Sir/ Madam,
Sample Answer:
Dear Sir/ Madam,
I am writing with regard to the article in your newspaper dated 7th September. My house is
situated within 20 minutes walk of the airport and increase the number of flights.
First of all, the low -flying aeroplanes are utterly distractive. They make such a big noise
that I cannot concentrate on housework at all. What is worse, I am woken up by the late hour
flights at midnight; I was diagnosed as insomnia the other day. I should call this situation noise
pollution.
Secondly, I am afraid that the expansion of the airport may reduce the plot of land for
the playground which is under construction near the airport at the moment.
To sum up, I strongly disagree with the plan. I would appreciate if you could possibly
write the article about the problems and disagreement as I said above.
Yours faithfully,
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
17/23
Comment:
This is an answer written by a candidate who achieved a Band 7. Here is the
examiners comment:
The response to the task is fluent , although there is a room for
expansion and clarification of some aspects of the task. The message is well-
organized and be followed throughout, with the writer making good use of
signpost words. There are some problems with the word choice and with the
word formation (e.g. big noise, distractive), but the range of sentence structures
is varied and well-controlled for accuracy.
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
18/23
GENERAL WRITING TASK 2
Question1:
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Write about the following topic:
Some people think it would be a good idea for schools to teach every young person how to be a
good parent.
Do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Describe the skills a person needs to be a good
parent.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or
experience.
Write at least 250 words.
Sample Answer:
Every young person, male or female should know more about being a good parent before having
children. There are many cases in which very young women give birth to little babies without
having a clue what means to be a parent.
In addition, school should provide courses, teaching young persons to be good parents.
It might seem as something very easy. Every woman can be a mother, the problem is what kind of
mother she is.
It is said that human instinct develops after giving birth to a child and every mother
father instinctually feels what to do for the baby. But, there are some things that ought to be
known before.
A child is not a simple toy. A child is a big responsibility, love and care. A mother should
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
19/23
know if she is already or not to have a child, and a couple should prepare having children.
We can see many cases with families behaving badly-in real life, on TV, reading
newspapers, when children, screaming and shouting, smacking them. Who is guilty then? Theparent or the child? This cases can end really badly if the persons in charge-here-parents and not
the children-dont learn how to behave themselves, how to handle their children, how and when
to give them support.
In addition to all the things written above, it would be a very good idea for schools to
teach young persons become good parents, as this can help young people how to handle their
problems and above all their childrens problems.
A child is the mirror of the parents.
COMMENT:
This is an answer written by a candidate who achieved a Band 6 score. Here is the examiners
comment:
This answer has a clear focus and presents a very definite point of view about the
general topic area. However, the second question is not directly addressed and no identifiable
parenting skills are described. This means the task is only partially answered and this limits the
Band score.
The argument is quite easy to follow and a range of devices is used to connect the
ideas. However, some of these connectives are not appropriate and paragraphing is not always
logical, especially at the beginning of the answer. The closing statement in the conclusion is
relevant to the argument but it is not well integrated into the writing.
A range of vocabulary is used with flexibility and a good level of control. There are
examples of appropriate idiomatic expressions that suggest that the writer has a good active
resource. There are some lapses and some minor spelling mistakes, but these do not reduce
communication.
The writer uses a range of structures effectively and accurately, with examples of
sophisticated phrasing. However, there are quite a lot of short, simple sentences too, and there
are lapses and omissions in some structures, although these do not prevent the reader from
understanding the message.
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
20/23
Question 2:
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Write about the following topic:
In the past, many people had skills such as making their own clothes and doing repairs
to
things in the house. In many countries, nowadays, skills like these are disappearing.
Why do you think this change is happening?
How far is this situation true in your country?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge orexperience.
Write at least 250 words.
Sample Answer:
In the past the people used to make clothes and doing repairs on things in the house more than
nowadays. This is caused for many aspects that are present in our days like the quantity of other
activities available to do, the differences in jobs and in lifestyle.
When in the past days the people finished their workday, it was still early and doing the some of
the repairs. While, in the other hand most of the women used to make clothes.
Nowdays is bigger the number of women that works, in addition to that, the work is normally
longer and more stressing for everyday, so the people is getting used to live as fast as possible.
Another element that is pushing to this situation is that as the people is having less and less time
for a hobby, any hobby will require more and more time. Because everything that you want to try
to repair is more technical and complicated than before, and to do some repair the people almost
have to be a qualified technician.
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
21/23
On top of all that the tradition is being lost because the people learn the traditions when they are
young and from their parents, but nowadays the young people have too many distractions and
hobbies like sports, going to shopping malls, video games, computers, cinema, amusement parks,
e-mail and chat rooms, instead of spending their free with their parents.
This situation is happening in the entire world, and its caused in part by the globalization and the
advance of the technology in the home.
So the situation is that when the people need more knowledge to their hobbies, they have less
time to acquire it because of their work. And that to transmit the traditions to other generations
the adults need the youngs people attention which they dont have because of new distractions
the youngs have.
COMMENT:
This is an answer written by a candidate who achieved a Band 6 score. Here is the
examiners comment:
The writing focuses on the first question but does not address the second one
directly. The candidate loses marks for this.
However, the writers point of view is clear and there are some relevant ideasthat are communicated effectively. Ideas are generally supported, and the argument is
organized with some clear linking, although paragraphing is not always used
appropriately.
A fairly wide range of language is attempted with mixed success. There are
some good idiomatic expressions and some accurate complex sentences, but the writer
misuses quite basic words and grammatical structures as well. The errors are quite
frequent, but the writers message can still be followed throughout the response.
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
22/23
Question 3:
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
You have been asked to write about the following topic.
It is generally accepted that families are not as close as they used to be.
Give some reasons why this change has happened and suggest how families could be
brought closer together.
Include any relevant examples from your experience.
You should write at least 250 words.
Sample Answer:
The todays family-life changed a lot. Many parents are divorce, a lot of mothers and fathers have
their jobs far awayfrom home. The children are often alone and lonelybut what are the reasons
for this happening?
First of all, I think that the modern technology is one of the main reason for this problem. Many
parents work in their nearest cities from their home. They work with computer in big offices and
came home late at night. However, they have no time to look after their children.
In the past, families used to work as a family. Every member worked hard and helped the family
to survive, for example farmers. Furthermore, the education used to be controlled by the parents,
not like todays day-schools with teachers and professors. On the other hand, there must be a
solution to bring separated families together. At my point of view, families should spend their free
time together. I am thinking about weekends or the time after work. Children need their parents
even when they are older. To give a reasonable example: I often go out with my parents, mostly
7/28/2019 Model Answer With Comments - Ielts
23/23
for a dinner. Then my brother and I speak about our future plans or something else. An intensiv
conversation is a possible solution. A similar way is, to divide your job into half-part work-times
and spend your free time leftover with your loved persons. A point against this statement is to
have financial problems.
To sum up I wish that every family is as close as possible with each other, if they like that.
COMMENT:
This is an answer written by a candidate who achieved a Band 6 score. Here is the
examiners comment:
The answer is an adequate response to the task, although there are not
many ideas and there is little development of these. The response reads fairly
easily, however, and the writers intention is usually clear. There is a variety of
sentence structures, and although these are not always grammatically accurate,
the errors do not interfere with the message. There are signs of vocabularylimitations.