Lord of the Rings Summary

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A brief summary of J.R.R.Tolkien's"THE LORD OF THE RINGS"

for the fantasy-impaired

Second edition by Jack A. Barker2000

Contents

l The Poem

l Background

l Characters

l The Hobbit

l Book I:Return of the Shadow

l Book II: The Fellowship of the Ring

l Book III: The Treason of Isengard

l Book IV: The Journey to Mordor

l Book V: The War of the Ring

l Book VI: The Return of the King

l Appendices

l Bored of the Rings

l The Ring Game

A note about book names:The Lord of the Rings is often mistakenly called a trilogy because it is published inthree volumes. In fact, it is one long novel, divided into six books (plus appendices), two of which appear in eachvolume. For the sake of navigation, I've divided my summary by the six-book breaks rather than the three-volumetitles: The Fellowship of the Ring, The Two Towers, and The Return of the King. The book titles I've used are taken

from material found in Christopher Tolkien's excellent series, The History of Middle-Earth. These are slightlydifferent than the book titles used in the recently-published seven-volume "Millennium Edition," mainly because it'sa pet peeve of mine when people call January 1, 2000 the start of the new millenniumit's not until January 1,2001, people!

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The Poem

Three Rings for the Elven-kings under the sky,Seven for the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone,

Nine for Mortal Men doomed to die,One for the Dark Lord on his dark throne

In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.

One Ring to rule them all, One Ring to find them,One Ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them

In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.

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Background

The Lord of the Rings and its precursor, The Hobbit, take place during the Third Age of Middle-Earth. Middle-Earthis a continent on a perpetually medieval fantasy world called Arda, which is filled with magical places, people, andevents, and where the forces of Good and Evil vie for dominion. It has always been vague whether Arda is meant to

be our "real" world in its prehistory, but I for one prefer to think of it in wholly imaginary terms. The confusionprobably stems from the amount of detail and realism that Tolkien puts into the story, in terms of things likeweather, climate, geography, and even phases of the moon. The history of Middle-Earth is broken up into four eras,aptly called the Four Ages.

During the First Age, the immortal Elves, the first Children of Ilvatar (aka. Eru, "the One"... God, basically),awoke by the shores of Cuivinen in Middle-Earth. Shortly thereafter, they were summoned to Valinor, the BlessedRealm, by the Valar. The Valar are akin to gods in the mythological sense, although they are rarely explicitly calledsuch. In fact, in the creation story of Arda, their role is closer to archangelswitnesses and participants in creationrather than originators. In any case, the Valar pretty much run the show on Arda for old Ilvatar. Those Elves whomade the journey to Valinor (which is located across the western sea from Middle-Earth) became known as the

Eldar, or High Elves, while those who remained in Middle-Earth became known as the Sindar, or Elves of theTwilight.

In Valinor, the Eldar learned many arts and crafts from the Valar (but don't thinkthey became a bunch of Martha Stewarts). The greatest of the Eldar was Fanor,who created three gems of surpassing beauty known as the Silmarils. However,the Silmarils were stolen by an evil Vala called Morgoth, the Dark Enemy of theWorld, who fled with them to Middle-Earth. Fanor and a great number of hiskinsmen vowed to pursue Morgoth and recover the Silmarils. Upon returning toMiddle-Earth, the Eldar discovered that Mortal Men (aka. "Men"), the SecondChildren of Ilvatar, had come into the world. Over the following centuries, the

Elves and Men battled the forces of Morgoth (consisting of such vile creatures asorcs, trolls, and dragons), but failed to recover the Silmarils. Finally, Beren (aMan) and Lthien Tinviel (an Elf maiden) ventured into Morgoth's stronghold ofAngband and stole one of the Silmarils from the evil Lord's crown. The great-

grandson of Beren and Lthien was Erendil the Mariner, who sailed to Valinor to beg the Valar to take up armsagainst Morgoth. The First Age of Middle-Earth came to an end when Angband was cast down, much of thecontinent was submerged, and Morgoth himself was bound by the Valar for all eternity. All of this and more isrelated in detail in The Silmarillion, another fine book.

The Second Age was the time of Nmenor, a great island kingdom of Men that lay within sight of Valinor itself.Erendil had two sons, Elrond and Elros, the Peredhil (Half-Elven). Elrond chose to follow the path of immortalElvenkind, while Elros chose to live out his life as a Mortal Man (albeit a long-lived one). Elros became the firstking of Nmenor. Back in Middle-Earth, in the land of Eregion, Elven smiths (led by Celebrimbor, grandson ofFanor) began forging the Rings of Power, talismans that gave their wearers great supernatural abilities (not theleast of which was invisibility). The Elves were unwittingly assisted in their efforts by Sauron, formerly the chieflieutenant of Morgoth. When the Elves had finished their labors, Sauron forged the Ruling Ring in the fires of Mt.Doom. The One Ring gave Sauron dominion over the others, causing them to be corrupted to his service. Only theThree Rings of the Elves remained free, having been forged by Celebrimbor alone, but even they could not be used

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without Sauron knowing about it. So for a time, the Elf lords set aside their Rings. The forging of the One Ringrevealed Sauron's true nature to the Elves, who declared war upon him. The Dark Lord took the fortified land ofMordor to be his stronghold.

Meanwhile, the descendents of Elros, the Edain, became mighty kings amongMankind. The Nmenreans were powerful and just, but eventually came to envythe immortality of the Elves. This left them vulnerable to the lies and deceptionsof Sauron. Through Sauron's treachery, Nmenor was destroyed and sank beneaththe sea. Only a handful of the Edain, led by the noble Elendil and his sons, Isuldur

and Anrion, survived the destruction by sailing to Middle-Earth. There, Elendilestablished a kingdom in the North called Arnor, while Isuldur and Anrionestablished the kingdom of Gondor in the south. Sauron was believed to have beendestroyed in the downfall of Nmenor, but in fact, his spirit had survived andreturned to Mordor. While the One Ring existed, he could not be utterlydestroyed. However, he was no longer able to take on a benevolent appearance.

To combat Sauron's evil, Elendil joined forces with Gil-galad, last of the kings of the Eldar. Together, the forces ofthe Last Alliance of Elves and Men were able to storm Mordor, driving Sauron's forces before them. Elendil andGil-galad were slain, but Isuldur cut the Ring from Sauron's hand, breaking his father's sword in the process. Sauronwas not killed, however, because Isuldur kept the Ring for himself, rather than destroying it. The first defeat of

Sauron signaled the end of the Second Age of Middle-Earth.

While on his way home from the war, Isuldur was ambushed by a company of orcs. He attempted to use the Ring'spower of invisibility to escape, but it slipped from his finger while he was swimming across the Anduin river. Nowvisible, he was slain by an orc's arrow. The Ring lay at the bottom of the river for centuries, until it was accidentallyfound by two friends, Dagol and Smagol. Smagol promptly murdered Dagol and took the Ring for himself. Heused his newfound invisibility for thieving and learning secrets. He was reviled by his people, who called him"Gollum," due to his peculiar habit of making gurgling noises in his throat. Eventually getting fed up with thisabuse, Smagol decided to leave home and made his way into the caverns beneath the Misty Mountains, where hethought he could learn the secrets of the world's making. This was in the year 2470 of the Third Age of Middle-Earth.

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Characters

(roughly in order of appearance)

Bilbo Baggins A hobbit of the Shire. He is recruited by Gandalf the Grey to participate in anadventure.

Gandalf the Grey One of the Istari, or wizards. Aka. Mithrandir, the Grey Pilgrim, Olrin, Tharkn,

Stormcrow. Originally one of the Maiar (roughly the equivalent of a demigod orangel), Gandalf was sent to Middle-Earth in mortal guise by the Valar to opposeSauron. When he arrived in Middle-Earth, Crdan the Shipwright gave him Naryathe Great, one of the three Elf Rings. Gandalf is the chief strategist and counselorto the forces of good.

Thorin Oakenshield A Dwarf, son of Thrin, son of Thrr, and rightful king of Erebor, the LonelyMountain.

The Dwarves The kinsmen and companions of Thorin, who share his quest to destroy the dragonSmaug and restore Thorin's kingdom (and treasure!). In no particular order, theyare: Dori, Ori, Nori, Balin, Dwalin, Fili, Kili, in, Glin, Bifor, Bofur, andBombur. After the events ofThe Hobbit, only Balin and Glin really have any part

in the story, and they're both pretty small.Tom, Bert & Bill Three trolls, who attempt to make a meal out of Bilbo and the Dwarves. Gandalf

tricks them into being caught in the sunlight, which turns them to stone. Bilbofinds an Elvish short sword among their booty, which he later names Sting.

Elrond Halfelven Lord of Rivendell, aka. Imladris, a hidden refuge of the Elves. Chief of the Eldar

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and bearer of Vilya, mightiest of the Three Rings.

Goblins/Orcs Hideous creatures made in mockery of the Elves by Morgoth. Nasty enough ontheir own, their evil natures make them perfect fodder for Sauron's armies. Called"goblins" in The Hobbit, and "orcs" in The Lord of the Rings. It's a linguistic thing.

The Great Goblin King of the goblins of the Misty Mountains. He gets killed.

Gollum/Smagol A wretched creature roughly the size of a hobbit, with webbed hands and feet, andenlarged eyes that shine with a green glow when he becomes agitated. He loses theRing to Bilbo, and later emerges from beneath the Misty Mountains to search for

his "Precious."Wargs Big, nasty, black, cunning wolves. The goblins sometimes ride them like horses.

Gwaihir the Windlord Lord of the Eagles, and a friend of Gandalf's.

Beorn A powerful Man with the ability to transform into a bear.

Thranduil The Elvenking, ruler of Mirkwood Forest, and father of Legolas Greenleaf. He andhis people are of the Sindar, Elves who did not journey to Valinor.

Bard A descendent of the King of Dale, a kingdom of Men that was destroyed by thedragon, Smaug.

Smaug A dragon with a bad attitude, and the object of Bilbo's long journey.

Din Thorin's cousin, ruler of the Dwarves of the Iron Hills. He comes to the Dwarves'assistance when they are besieged. He becomes King Under The Mountain afterThorin is killed in battle.

The Sackville-Bagginses Bilbo's cousins from the wrong side of the Shire. The youngest of these, Lotho,later declares himself the "Chief" of the Shire, but is really just a toady forSaruman, who orders Wormtongue to kill him.

Frodo Baggins Bilbo's nephew and heir. After throwing himself an 111th birthday party, Bilbogives Frodo the Ring. At the Council of Elrond, Frodo volunteers to be the Ring-Bearer and convey the Ring to its destruction in Mt. Doom.

Samwise Gamgee Frodo's gardener, trusted servant, and inseparable heterosexual companion. He

accompanies Frodo on his quest, and for my money, is the real hero of the book.Peregrin Took One of Frodo's cousins, and more commonly called Pippin. He joins Frodo in his

flight from the Shire, and later becomes involved in the War of the Ring. Afterlooking into the Palantr, a crystal ball of immense power, he is taken to MinasTirith by Gandalf.

Meriadoc Brandybuck Another of Frodo's cousins, who goes by the nickname Merry. He also goes alongwhen Frodo flees the Shire, and later becomes Swordthain to King Thoden ofRohan. Merry assists owyn in slaying the Lord of the Nazgl.

Sauron The Dark Lord of Mordor, former servant of Morgoth, forger of the One Ring, andall-around embodiment of evil. Sauron wants to retrieve the Ring in order to gain

complete domination over Middle-Earth. He never actually appears "in person"during the course of the book.

The Nazgls Also called the Black Riders or the Ringwraiths, the Nazgls are the bearer of theNine Rings of Mortal Men, and therefore, are Sauron's most powerful andterrifying servants. In the early part of the story, they pursue the hobbits from theShire. Later, they lead Sauron's armies in the assault upon the forces of Gondor.The chieftain of the Nazgls bears a prophecy that no Mortal Man may harm him.

Old Man Willow An ill-tempered tree that traps the hobbits in the Old Forest. Yes, I said a tree.

Tom Bombadil A jolly figure with amazing powers who rescues the hobbits from disaster in theOld Forest, and later saves them from the Barrow-Wights. Exactly who Tom is,

where he comes from, and how he fits in to the pantheon of Arda, are neverexplained.

Goldberry Tom Bombadil's live-in girlfriend, the "daughter of the River" (whatever the heckthat means).

Barrow-Wights Evil spirits who dwell in tombs upon the Barrow-Downs.

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Barliman Butterbur Owner and proprietor ofThe Prancing Pony, an inn located in the town of Bree.

Bob and Nob Butterbur's flunkies.

Aragorn Known in Bree as Strider, Aragorn is chieftain of the Dnedain (aka. the Rangersof the North), and heir to the ancient thrones of Arnor and Gondor. He bears as histoken the Sword That Was Broken, which his ancestor Isuldur used to cut the Ringfrom Sauron's hand. A Man of Destiny, with even more names than Gandalf. Heleads the Fellowship after Gandalf's fall.

Bill Ferny A rather nasty resident of Bree, who sells out the hobbits to the Nazgls.

Bill the Pony A skinny, half-starved old pony sold to the hobbits by Bill Ferny. He proves to berather steadfast and loyal, to Sam in particular.

Glorfindel An Elf of Elrond's household, sent to search for the hobbits when they don't arrivein Rivendell on time.

Legolas Greenleaf Son of Thranduil, the Elvenking of Mirkwood Forest. He joins the Fellowship ofthe Ring as the representative of Elvenkind.

Gimli A Dwarf, the son of Glin (one of Bilbo's old pals). He joins the Fellowship as therepresentative of the Dwarves.

Boromir A Man, the son of Denethor, the Steward of Gondor. He joins the Fellowship, but

succumbs to his desire for the Ring. He later redeems himself by falling in battledefending the hobbits.

Saruman A wizard, formerly the Chief of the White Council, and wise in ring-lore. Gandalfdiscovers that Saruman has betrayed the Council and seeks to claim the Ring forhimself. Saruman's stronghold is Isengard, an ancient tower built by theNmenreans. His symbol is the White Hand.

Arwen Evenstar The daughter of Elrond, and Aragorn's one true love.

Caradhras A mountain with a bad attitude. Hey, these things happen in epic fantasy novels.See Old Man Willow, above.

The Balrog A demon of fire and darkness from the First Age. In the Mines of Moria, Gandalf

falls into an abyss while battling it. Inside joke: in the original edition of AD&D,the Balrog would be classified as a "Type V Demon."

Galadriel The lady of Lothlrien, the Golden Wood. She is one of the Eldar who returnedfrom Valinor with Fanor to seek the Silmarils. The bearer of Vilya, one of theThree Rings.

Celeborn The lord of Lothlrien. Galadriel's consort.

The Uruk-hai A type of orc bred by Saruman, believed to be at least partially human. They aregenerally bigger, stronger, smarter, and more ill-tempered than normal orcs.

omer adig The nephew of King Thoden of Rohan, and a Marshall of the Riders of Rohan.He and Aragorn become great friends and allies. He succeeds Thoden as king.

Riders of Rohan Aka. the Rohirrim, skilled horsemen native to the land of Rohan. Staunch allies ofGondor.

Treebeard Leader of the Ents, immensely strong tree-like creatures who tend Middle-Earth'sancient forests. He finds Merry and Pippin, who convince him to act againstSaruman.

Thoden Ednew King of the Mark, lord of Rohan. He is old, and believes himself feeble due to thelies of his counselor, Grma Wormtongue. Gandalf breaks Wormtongue's hold overThoden, and the king rides to glory in battle.

Grma Wormtongue King Thoden's most intimate counselor, until Gandalf exposes him as a toadie forSaruman. He comes to a particularly nasty end.

owyn omer's sister. She longs to ride into battle, especially after she gets the hots forAragorn. owyn disguises herself as a man and travels with the Riders of Rohan toGondor, where she kills the Lord of the Nazgl. She later gets over her thing forAragorn when she meets Faramir.

FaramirBoromir's brother. He finds Frodo, Sam, and Gollum in Ithilien, a land on the

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The Hobbit

In the year 2941 of the Third Age of Middle-Earth (1341 of the "Shire Reckoning"), Bilbo Baggins is visited byGandalf the Grey. The following day, Bilbo's hobbit-hole is virtually invaded by thirteen Dwarves, led by theformidable Thorin Oakenshield. Through some chicanery on Gandalf's part, the Dwarves believe that Bilbo is a

professional burglar, whom they have decided to hire to assist them in recovering their stolen horde of treasure. Thetwo catches are: 1) Bilbo doesn't know the first thing about burgling, and 2) the treasure happens to be in thepossession of a vicious dragon named Smaug. Nonetheless, Bilbo sets off with the Dwarves for Erebor, the LonelyMountain, which stands on the far edge of the Wilderlands.

After a brief encounter with some trolls (during which Bilbo nearly manages to get the entire group eaten), theadventurers arrive at the home ofElrond Halfelven. The Elf lord discovers "moon letters" on a map of Erebor inThorin's possession, which tell of a secret side entrance into the mountain kingdom. After leaving Elrond's house,the Dwarves, wizard, and hobbit attempt to cross the Misty Mountains. When they take shelter in a cave, however,they are captured by goblins. Thanks to some timely magic on Gandalf's part (including killing the "Great Goblin"),the Dwarves escape. In the confusion of the getaway, Bilbo becomes separated from the party.

Alone in the tunnels, Bilbo makes his way by the pale light of his sword (it glows in proximity to goblins) towardsan underground lake. As he feels his way along, he comes across a ring, which he absentmindedly puts in hispocket. Shortly thereafter, he meets Gollum, not knowing that the ring belongs to the toadlike creature. Gollumchallenges Bilbo to a riddle game: if Bilbo wins, Gollum will show him the way out of the caves, but if Gollumwins, Bilbo will be Gollum's dinner. Bilbo and Gollum each answer several riddles, but then Bilbo becomes stuckfor a riddle to ask. At that moment, he feels the ring in his pocket and wonders out loud, "What have I got in mypocket?" Gollum believes that this question is meant to be a riddle, and is rather perturbed when he can't guess theanswer. He decides to kill and eat Bilbo anyway, but paddles back to his island to get the ring first, so he canthrottle Bilbo in invisible safety. When Gollum begins shrieking over the loss of the ring, Bilbo realizes the jig is upand beats a hasty retreat. Gollum surmises that Bilbo knows the way out after all and sets out in pursuit. Just asGollum is about to catch up with him, Bilbo accidentally puts on the ring and is surprised when the loathsomecreature runs right past him. Bilbo follows the slimy thing, and from listening to Gollum talking to himself, learns:1) that Gollum is leading him to the "back door," and 2) that the ring is magical. The back door is guarded bygoblins, and Gollum dares go no further. As Bilbo makes his escape, he hears Gollum crying out, "Thief Baggins!We hates it forever!"

Once outside, Bilbo quickly finds the wizard and Dwarves, who have also managed to escape from the goblins'

outskirts of Mordor. Faramir does not succumb to the Ring's lure, and helps Frodoon his way. He later returns to Gondor and is wounded by a Nazgl. He has some"issues" with his father.

Shelob A great monstrous spider that lives in the mountain passes of Mordor. Gollumbetrays Frodo and Sam to her, but Sam manages to drive her away.

Denethor The Steward of Gondor, and father of Boromir and Faramir. He takes the death ofBoromir (his favorite of the two), pretty hard. When Faramir is wounded by theNazg, Denethor tries to immolate both himself and his ailing son, but Faramir is

rescued thanks to the timely intervention of Gandalf and Pippin.Beregond A Citadel Guard who befriends Pippin. He deserts his post to help save Faramir

from Denethor's madness.

Bergil Beregond's son, who shows Pippin around the city of Minas Tirith.

Prince Imrahil A Prince of Gondor who leads his people in the Battle of the Pellennor Fields.

Elladan & Elrohir The sons of Elrond. They ride with the Dnedain to Aragorn's aid.

Corsairs of Umbar Race of evil mariners who are hereditary enemies of Gondor.

Ghan-buri-Ghan One of the Wild Men of the Hills (don't ask), who shows the Rohirrim a shortcut toMinas Tirith.

The Mouth of Sauron A twisted being sent to parley with Gandalf when the armies of Gondor and Rohanmarch upon the Gates of Mordor.

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demenses. The goblins and wargs pursue them, but the party is rescued by eagles, who bring them to the domain ofBeorn, whom Gandalf describes as a "skin-changer." Beorn is not fond of visitors, but the wizard's tale of theirourney makes him decide to help. The next leg of the journey is through the fearful Mirkwood Forest, and to the

Dwarves' dismay, Gandalf announces that he will no longer be journeying with them. As the group crosses theforest, they meet up with several misadventures, including a battle with giant spiders and imprisonment by theWood Elves. Through the use of his quick wits, the ring, and his short sword (named Sting after the battle with thespiders), Bilbo manages to save the day in each situation, finally bringing the Dwarves to Esgaroth, a town built onplatforms over Long Lake. The Lake-town is the last remnant of the ancient kingdom of Dale.

Assisted by the lake-men, the adventurers travel to the Lonely Mountain. Aftersome fruitless searching, Bilbo locates the secret door indicated on Thorin's map.Bilbo is reluctantly drafted to be the first one to explore the tunnel, and is orderedby Thorin to "burgle something." Summoning up his courage, Bilbo puts on hisring and makes his way into the dragon's lair. After a bit of verbal sparring, Bilbosnatches a golden cup and makes a run for it. This makes Smaug pretty darnangry. On a subsequent trip down the tunnel, Bilbo gives evasive answers to thedragon's questions, and accidentally leads the dragon to believe that he is a nativeof Lake-town. Smaug smashes the side of the mountain (the Dwarves, warned bythe hobbit, manage to duck inside the tunnel just in time), and flies off to destroyEsgaroth.

Smaug does just that, causing immense death and destructions to the citizens of Esgaroth. In the midst of the crisis,however, a thrush flies to a guardsman named Bard, and gives him a vital bit of information that was uncovered byBilbo. Specifically, the dragon has an unarmored spot on his underside. Using the Black Arrow, an heirloom of thelong-lost kings of Dale, Bard is able to hit Smaug's vulnerable patch and slay the wicked wyrm. The dragon's corpsecrashes onto Lake-town, destroying it utterly.

Meanwhile, the hobbit and Dwarves explore the Lonely Mountain, fearing the dragon's return. Bilbo finds theArkenstone, a gem of great value, but keeps it hidden from the Dwarves. The thrush brings them news of thedragon's demise and the destitution of Lake-town. Thorin, however, turns out to be a greedy so-and-so, and ordersthat the mountain be barricaded against the Men, who will certainly want some of the treasure. Bilbo is baffled by

this attitude. Sure enough, an army of Men led by Bard arrives, along with an army of Elves led by Thranduil, theElvenking of Mirkwood Forest. Faced with Thorin's stubbornness, the two armies lay siege to Erebor. Bilbo tries tosalvage the situation by giving the Arkenstone to Bard and the Elvenking, but his efforts are stymied by the arrivalof an army of Dwarves under the leadership of Thorin's cousin Din. The battle is about to be joined when Gandalfsuddenly appears in the middle of the field, and warns all three groups of the approach of an army of goblins, whohave been stirred up by the adventurers' activities in the Misty Mountains. The Men, Elves, and Dwarves join forcesagainst the goblins, but even their combined strength does not seem to be enough to withstand the fierce onslaught.At the last moment, however, an army of eagles swoops down and turns the tide of battle. Bilbo misses the end ofthe fight, as he is accidentally knocked out by a falling rock.

When he awakens, he is taken to Thorin, who is dying. Thorin repents and parts in friendship with Bilbo. Din isnow King Under The Mountain, and he agreeably gives the Men and Elves a fair portion of the treasure. Bard setsabout the task of rebuilding the kingdom of Dale. The Arkenstone is laid to rest with Thorin in the deepest part ofthe mountain. Bilbo returns home, accompanied by Gandalf. He arrives to find that his cousins, the Sackville-Bagginses, have had him declared legally dead and are auctioning off his personal belongings. Bilbo manages to setthings right, but is no longer respected by his no-nonsense neighbors. Nevertheless, he remains happy andcontented.

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Book I: The Return of the Shadow

Sixty years after the events depicted in The Hobbit, Bilbo Baggins throws a huge birthday party to celebrate his111th birthday, as well as the 33rd birthday of his nephew and heir, Frodo Baggins. At the height of the feast, Bilbogives a farewell speech and vanishes, causing much uproar and consternation among his guests. Later, as Bilboprepares to leave the Shire for once and for all, Gandalf appears and convinces him to leave the ring for Frodo,along with the rest of his inheritance. Bilbo does so, albeit reluctantly. Gandalf agrees to look in on Frodo from timeto time.

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Seventeen years pass, and Frodo begins to wonder what the hell ever happened to Bilbo. Gandalf shows up after along absence and informs him that Bilbo's ring is, in fact, the One Ring, and that if he likes his skin the way it is(that is, intact), he'd better head for the hills. Sauron and his boys are sure to come looking for it. Given this direwarning, Frodo procrastinates for several months about leaving the Shire. When he, his gardener Sam, and hiscousins Merry and Pippin, finally do make a break for it, they are pursued by mysterious Black Riders. The hobbitstry to take a shortcut through an eerie woodland called the Old Forest, but they are captured by an evil willow treeand subsequently rescued by Tom Bombadil. Tom is a spritely fellow with a blue hat and yellow boots. He andGoldberry give the hobbits shelter and warn them about the evil spirits of the Barrow-downs. They blunder intotrouble with the Barrow-Wights anyway. Luckily, they are still within Tom's domain when this happens, and he

comes to their rescue again. The hobbits loot the Barrows before continuing on their way, each taking a short swordleft over from the kingdom of Arnor's ancient war against the Nazgls.

The hobbits' next stop is the village of Bree. There, at an inn called The Prancing Pony, they meet a Man namedStrider, whom the innkeeper describes as a "Ranger." Frodo accidentally puts on the Ring in public, causing quite astir. The hobbits have to leave town, and Strider offers to be their guide to Rivendell (where they were supposed tohave met up with Gandalf). Frodo is suspicious of the Ranger until Butterbur produces a letter from Gandalf, whichthe portly innkeeper forgot to have delivered to Frodo in the Shire. In the letter, Gandalf warns Frodo about theBlack Riders and informs him that Strider is actually Aragorn, chieftain of the Dnedain. Narrowly escaping fromthe Black Riders in Bree, the hobbits are forced to purchase a pony from Bill Ferny, a suspicious character. Theparty heads into the wilderness, taking a roundabout route to Rivendell. At a hill known as Weathertop, the party is

ambushed by the Black Riders, and Frodo is wounded. As the group continues toward Rivendell, Frodo becomesincreasingly ill, due to the evil nature of the dagger with which he was stabbed. Elrond, meanwhile, has sent peopleout looking for them, and one of these, an Elf lord named Glorfindel, finds them. Thanks to Glorfindel's horse (andsome magical help from Elrond and Gandalf), Frodo is able to get by the Black Riders at the Ford of Bruinen andfinally arrive at Elrond's stronghold. However, his Barrow sword is broken in the confrontation.

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Book II: The Fellowship of the Ring

When Frodo awakens in Rivendell, the first person he meets is Gandalf, who chastises him for all the boneheaded

moves he's made so far. Frodo is then reunited with Bilbo, who has been living at Rivendell since he left at thebeginning of Book I.

Frodo and Bilbo are summoned to the Council of Elrond, where the history and fate of the Ring are debated. Thefollowing bits of information are revealed, not necessarily in this order. Glin (one of Bilbo's old Dwarf pals)reports that agents of Sauron have been nosing around Erebor looking for a hobbit named Baggins. Legolas reportsthat Gollum (who had been held in the custody of the Wood Elves for a bit) has escaped. Boromir reports that hehad a dream in which he was told to seek the Sword That Was Broken, as well as "Isuldur's Bane" (the Ring).Aragorn shows off his sword, and reports that now that Isuldur's Bane has been found, the sword will be reforged.Gandalf reports that the former leader of the White Council, Saruman, has turned traitor and had taken Gandalfprisoner (he escaped with some help from his old buddy, Gwaihir, the Lord of the Eagles). Finally, they bring out

the Ring and debate what the heck to do with the darned thing. After considering and rejecting several unworkableoptions, the Council decides that their only chance is to send the Ring to be destroyed in Mount Doom.Unfortunately, Mount Doom is located right smack dab in the center of Mordor, the land of Sauron. Frodovolunteers to be the Ring-Bearer.

Since the mission will rely on stealth more than brute strength, Elrond decides that a small group will be sent withFrodo. All of the "free people" are to be represented in the Fellowship of the Ring: Gandalf leads the group;Aragorn and Boromir go on behalf of Men; Gimli, son of Glin, for the Dwarves; Legolas for the Elves; and Frodo,Sam, Merry, and Pippin for the hobbits. Before they leave, Bilbo gives Frodo Sting (his Elvish sword) and a chainmail shirt made of mithril silver, a very tough, beautiful, and durable metal.

The Fellowship departs from Rivendell. They are unable to pass over the Misty Mountains due to the malice ofCaradhras, and are pursued by wargs. Gandalf has no option but to lead the group to the gate of Moria. An ancientunderground dwarven kingdom, Moria has now fallen into evil. The group encounters a demonic creature of fireand shadow called a Balrog. Gandalf attempts to hold the monster at bay while the others flee, and falls into achasm, dragging the Balrog down with him.

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The remainder of the Fellowship, now led by Aragorn, escapes from Moria andmakes its way to Lothlrien, an Elvish kingdom ruled by the Lady Galadriel andher consort, Celeborn. The Elves give them shelter and supplies. Galadriel showsFrodo and Sam her magic mirror, in which they see strange visions. Just beforethe Fellowship departs, Galadriel gives gifts to the party. Among these are Elvishcloaks that provide almost supernatural camouflage. To Frodo, she gives a glassphial in which a glimmer of the light of the Silmarils has been captures. To Sam,she gives a box of dirt.

The Fellowship travels downriver by boat. Frodo and Aragorn each learn that theyare being tailed by Gollum. Finally, they arrive at the Falls of Rauros, where theymust decide either to go directly east to Mordor, or west to Gondor first. Frodo

knows that it is his duty to go to Mordor, but he is afraid for his companions. As Frodo ponders his course of action,he is approached by Boromir, who urges the hobbit to go to Minas Tirith, the capital city of Gondor. When Frodoexplains that he cannot, Boromir goes nuts and tries to grab the Ring. Frodo escapes from his clutches by putting onthe Ring, and decides to leave for Mordor on his own, right away. Boromir regains his senses and informs the restof the Fellowship that Frodo has disappeared. Everybody scatters in confusion, except Aragorn, who alone keepshis head. He orders Boromir to follow Merry and Pippin to keep them safe, then heads off to find Frodo. Samrealizes what Frodo is up to, and intercepts his master just as Frodo is casting off to cross the river. Frodo wantsSam to stay behind, but Sam insists on going with Frodo to Mordor.

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Book III: The Treason of Isengard

Aragorn follows Frodo's trail, but is too late to catch him. Suddenly, he hears Boromir's horn blowing, calling forhelp. He finds Boromir dying. Boromir confesses his crime and asks Aragorn to go to Minas Tirith and aid hispeople. Before expiring, the warrior also tells Aragorn that Merry and Pippin have been captured by a group of orcs.Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli give Boromir a viking's funeral, setting him adrift on a boat on the river. Aragornexamines the traces left behind by Frodo and Sam, deducing what they have done. The quest of the Ring-Bearer isno longer in their hands, so the Man, Dwarf, and Elf begin a long chase to catch the orcs and rescue the hobbits.

The orcs carrying Merry and Pippin are Uruk-hai, servants of Saruman. Thehobbits are dragged across the land of Rohan, en route to Isengard, Saruman'sstronghold. Due to a combination of luck, quick thinking, and their Elf-cloaks, thepair manage to escape from the orc-band just before the Uruk-hai are slaughteredby the Riders of Rohan (aka. the Rohirrim). Merry and Pippin make their way intothe mysterious Fangorn Forest. There, they meet Treebeard the Ent. Their reportof Saruman's activities stirs Treebeard into action, and he in turn recruits the otherEnts to join in the fight against Saruman.

Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli meet the Riders and their leader, omer, shortly after

the battle. Despite the Riders' report that no one survived, the hunters continue tothe site of the slaughter, hoping to find some trace of their companions. Just inside

Fangorn, the trio meets Gandalf, who has returned from the dead more powerful than before. Since Saruman hasbecome corrupt, Gandalf is now chief of the Istari, and has been transformed into Gandalf the White. He assures hisfriends that the hobbits are in good hands and leads them to Meduseld, the home ofKing Thoden of Rohan.Gandalf breaks the spell of the slimy Wormtongue, restoring Thoden to his old self. Aragorn meets owyn,omer's sister, who immediately gets the hots for him (he is the Heir of Elendil, after all). Thoden resolves to leadhis troops into battle against the forces of Saruman. There is a terrific battle in the ancient stronghold of Helm'sDeep, which the army of Rohan wins thanks to the timely appearance of a forest of walking trees.

The morning after the battle, Gandalf, Thoden, Aragorn, Gimli, Legolas, omer, and a detachment of Rohirrim

travel to Isengard, which they find in ruins. Merry and Pippin greet the travelers and there is a joyful reunion of thefriends. The two hobbits describe the attack of the Ents on Isengard, and report that Saruman and Wormtongue havetaken refuge in Orthanc, the Nmenrean tower that stands in the center of Isengard (note: this is the first of the"Two Towers" that give the second volume its name). The Ents were also responsible for sending the trees thathelped win the battle at Helm's Deep. Gandalf and company go to the tower to parley with the fallen wizard. In theconfrontation, Gandalf breaks Saruman's staff and strips him of most of his power. While they talk, Wormtongue

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throws an object down from the tower. It is a palantr, an ancient crystal ball originally brought to Middle-Earth byElendil. Pippin retrieves the palantr and brings it to Gandalf.

As the group rides back to Helm's Deep, Pippin is overwhelmed by curiosity and swipes the palantr from Gandalf.Looking into it, he is confronted by Sauron himself. Gandalf realizes what has happened and comes to the rescue.Moments later, a Nazgl, now mounted on a winged monster, flies overhead. Gandalf entrusts the palantr toAragorn and, taking Pippin along for safekeeping, rides on ahead to Gondor.

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Book IV: The Journey to Mordor

As Frodo and Sam try to escape the treacherous hills on the east side of the river, they encounter Gollum. Frodotames him and forces him to guide the hobbits to the gate of Mordor. After a harrowing passage of the DeadMarshes, the little group reaches the entrance to Mordor. However, the gate is closed tight and swarming with orcs.Gollum claims that he knows of a less-guarded entrance to Mordor in the mountain passes to the south, and offers totake Frodo there. As they continue on their way, Sam becomes increasingly aware of a conflict between twodifferent parts of Gollum's personality. The "Smagol" half seems genuinely reformed, but the "Gollum" half is justas treacherous as ever. The one thing that both halves seem to agree on is that they want their "Precious" back.

While passing through Ithilien, a forestland on the borders of Mordor, Frodo andSam are captured by the Rangers of Ithilien, led by Faramir, Boromir's youngerbrother. Faramir learns of the Ring, and Boromir's reaction to it, but does notsuccumb to its temptation. When the Rangers capture Gollum, Frodo bargains forhis release. With Faramir's blessing, the trio makes their way to the vicinity ofMinas Morgul, the city of the Nazgl (note: it's the second of the "Two Towers").As they pass by, they see a great host issue forth from the black city and headtowards Gondor. Frodo is nearly found out when he sees the Lord of the Nazgl,who senses the power of the Ring nearby.

Gollum's path leads the hobbits far up into the mountains. They come to theentrance of a dark tunnel, which Gollum enters. Frodo and Sam are loathe tofollow. They muster up their courage and pass within, but quickly discover that the passage is a black maze and thattheir guide has deserted them. By using Galadriel's phial and Sting, Frodo and Sam escape from the maze, but areattacked by Shelob, a giant spider. Sam rushes to Frodo's aid, but is ambushed by Gollum. By the time Samextricates himself from Gollum's grasp, Frodo has been poisoned. Sam take Sting and drives the spider away, butthe damage is done. Frodo is dead. After some deliberation, Sam takes the Ring, resolved to continue the quest onhis own. No sooner has he left Frodo's side, than two groups of orcs converge on the site of the battle. Using theRing, Sam overhears the orcs, who say that Frodo is not dead, only comatose. Sam immediately abandons the questto rescue Frodo from the orcs, but he is too late. The orcs carry Frodo's inert form into the great tower of CirithUngol, as Sam knocks himself silly trying to gain entrance.

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Book V: The War of the Ring

Gandalf and Pippin arrive in Minas Tirith, the chief city of Gondor. They meet with Denethor, the Steward ofGondor, who already knows that Boromir is dead. The fallen warrior's broken horn was found by Faramir. Pippindescribes Boromir's valor, and offers his sword to Denethor, who makes him a Citadel Guard. While Gandalf andDenethor exchange information, Pippin is shown around the city by Beregond, a Citadel Guard, and his son, Bergil.Together, they watch the forces of Gondor gather, including Prince Imrahil. The following day, a great darknessspreads across the sky.

On the road from Isengard, Aragorn, Thoden, and company, are met by a mounted force of the Dnedain,accompanied by the Sons of Elrond. Based on messages they bring, Aragorn, Gimli, Legolas, and the Dnedaintake leave of Thoden and Merry, riding on ahead. They arrive at Dunharrow, a Rohirrim stronghold at the foot ofthe mountains dividing Rohan and Gondor. Aragorn shows himself to Sauron in the palantr, hoping to distract theDark Lord. He succeeds in wrenching control of the stone to his own will, but sees a great force ofCorsairs

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gathering in the south to attack Gondor. The only way he can bring help in time is to take the Paths of the Dead, atunnel through the mountains that is fraught with peril. Despite owyn's attempts to convince him otherwise (andrefusing her request to ride with him), Aragorn leads the Rangers (and Legolas and Gimli) through the mountains tothe Stone of Erech. There, he commands a host of dead warriors who are bound to obey the Heir of Elendil tofollow him to Gondor.

Merry has remained with Thoden and the Rohirrim, and becomes the king'sesquire. They arrive in Dunharrow the afternoon after Aragorn left. owyn is quitebummed, both because she has the hots for Aragorn, and because she longs for

glory in battle. Merry is given armor and stuff, but is not allowed to ride with theRohirrim to Gondor, because he's too little. A rider named Dernhelm lets Merrysecretly hitch a ride.

Minas Tirith is besieged. The Lord of the Nazgl's host surrounds the city. Faramirmanages to make it back, and reports on his meeting with Frodo. Denethor ispissed that Faramir had the Ring in his hands and didn't bring it to Minas Tirith.Gandalf reassures Faramir that he did the right thing. Faramir leads a sortie againstthe evil host, and is wounded by one of the Black Riders, who you will recall arenow riding on flying beasts. The gate to the city is broken, and Gandalf confronts the Lord of the Nazgl. Beforeeither of them can do much more than posture a bit, the darkness over the city breaks, the horns of the Rohirrim are

heard in the distance, and the Nazgl chieftain withdraws from the gates.

Merry rides with the Rohirrim to Gondor. They are helped past the evil sentries by the Wild Men of the Hills. Theyarrive at Minas Tirith just as dawn is breaking. Thoden boldly leads the Riders into battle, but is cut down by theLord of the Nazgl. Everyone flees before the Black Rider except Dernhelm, now revealed to be owyn in disguise(surprise!). Unnoticed in the confusion, Merry stabs the Lord in the foot with the sword he got in the Barrow (wayback in Book I), which somehow makes the Ringwraith's spectral flesh substantial. owyn seizes the opporutnityand kills the Lord of the Nazgl, fulfilling the prophecy that no "man" could defeat him. Thoden lives long enoughto name omer his heir, then dies. omer then spots owyn (who appears to be dead from the strain of killing theWitch-King), goes nuts, and leads his troops back into the battle.

It appears that no amount of berserk rage is going to do any good, however, because ablack fleet comes up the river, apparently bearing reinforcements for the evil army.But just as things are looking their bleakest, the wind unfurls the lead ship's flag,revealing the standard of Elendil (which only the king of Gondor may use). Yes, it'sAragorn, Legolas, Gimli, the Dnedain, and a bunch of other guys, come to the rescue.Aragorn and omer meet again, as kings in the midst of the hosts of Mordor, as hadbeen previously prophesized. Much death and destruction ensue.

Back at the city gates, Pippin catches up with Gandalf just as the wizard is about topursue the Lord of the Nazgl onto the field. Denethor, it seems, has lost his marblesand is going to incinerate both himself and the wounded Faramir. Gandalf follows

Pippin to the Houses of the Dead and saves Faramir, although Denethor dies byhurling himself onto a blazing pyre. It turns out that he also had a palantr, saw Aragorn's fleet coming, and figuredthey were all doomed. Faramir is taken to the Houses of Healing, where Gandalf spends the rest of the battletending to the wounded. Later, Pippin finds Merry wandering in a delerium. One of the old women at the Houses ofHealing remarks that the kings of Gondor were renowned for their healing prowess. Gandalf sends for Aragorn,who arrives incognito because he doesn't want to officially enter the city until he's actually been crowned king (youhave to do these things by the book, you know). Aragorn brings Faramir, owyn, and Merry back from the brink ofdeath.

The generals hold a debate to figure out what to do next. They've beaten one of Sauron's armies, but they know thenext one will be bigger, and the one after that, ad nauseum. Their only real hope is to draw as many troops out ofMordor as possible, so the Ring-Bearer will have a chance to destroy the Ring. They decide to march on Mordor. Atthe gates of Mordor, they are greeted by a weirdo calling himself the Mouth of Sauron, who shows them Frodo'smithril shirt, Sam's sword, and some other things belonging to the hobbits. Naturally, this leads them to theconclusion that Sauron has the Ring. Rather than submit, however, Gandalf defies the Mouth, takes back thehobbits' stuff, and calls Sauron nasty names. At this, a truly huge army pours out of the Gates and attacks the goodguys. Pippin (the only hobbit there at the time) finds himself fighting with a troll. Things look grim, but Pippinhears someone shouting, "The Eagles are coming!" which reminds him of Bilbo's adventure. Then he gets knocked

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out. Y'know, I just realized that three out of the six books end with a hobbit losing consciousness: I (Frodo), IV(Sam), and V (Pippin). How odd.

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Book VI: The Return of the King

Sam recovers his wits and makes his way into the tower. There, he finds that the squabbling orcs have done most ofhis dirty work, killing each other over what to do with Frodo's sword, chain mail, and cloak. One orc gets away withthe stuff. Sam finds Frodo in the very top of the tower and gives him back the Ring. They disguise themselves asorcs and press on, escaping the tower just as a Nazgl shows up to find out what the heck's going on.

The journey across Mordor is fraught with danger, not the least of which is thegrowing puissance of the Ring, which is working its evil magic on Frodo. Samkeeps them going. Finally, they arrive at the foot of Mount Doom. Sam carriesFrodo piggyback. They are jumped by Gollum, which snaps Frodo out of hisstupor. He cows Gollum, then proceeds up the mountain, leaving Sam to deal withthe slimy bugger. Gollum begs Sam for mercy, claiming that when the Ring isdestroyed, he too will die. Sam tells him to beat it, then follows Frodo. Inside theCracks of Doom, he catches up with Frodo, just as his master puts on the Ring andclaims it for his own. Before Sam can react, dogged old Gollum jumps theinvisible Frodo (whom we assume Gollum can see because of his long affinity for the Ring... or maybe not, maybehe just smells him). The two wrestle a bit, and then Gollum bites Frodo's finger off, Ring and all. In his jubilation,Gollum steps too close to the edge of the crater and falls into the fire. The Ring is destroyed. Sam and Frodo (nowcompletely back to his old self, more or less) leave the cavern, but all hell is breaking loose, as are large portions ofthe mountain. They bid each other farewell and swoon. Fire and brimstone will do that.

Back at the battle, Sauron's forces suddenly lose heart and make a break for it. Gandalf realizes what's happenedand calls in his old buddy, the Lord of the Eagles. They quickly fly to Mount Doom and scoop up Frodo and Samust before the hobbits fall into a lava flow. When the pair revive, they are honored by the assembled hosts of

Gondor and Rohan. The army returns to Minas Tirth, where Aragorn is welcomed as king by the people. The Third

Age of Middle-Earth is ended with Sauron's defeat, and now the Fourth Age (aka. the Age of Men) has begun(remember when I said way back in the background section that there were four ages?).

Meanwhile, Faramir and owyn (and Merry) have completely recovered and fallen in love (Faramir and owyn,that is... Merry has nothing to do with the love part). Everything is now hunky-dory. Later, Aragorn finds a seedlingof the White Tree (the living symbol of Nmenor, and subsequently of the combined kingdoms of Gondor andArnor), and gets married to Arwen, Elrond's daughter.

The hobbits begin the long journey back to the Shire. Along the way, they meet Saruman and Wormtongue, whohave become beggars. The defrocked wizard makes some dire utterings about the Shire, then goes along his way.The party gets back to Rivendell just in time for Bilbo's birthday. After spending some time with the old hobbit,

Frodo, Sam, Merry, and Pippin head back to the Shire. Gandalf goes with them as far as Bree, but then leaves tohave a heart-to-heart talk with Tom Bombadil (reinforcing the theory that Tom is some deity or demideity indisguise, much like Gandalf himself).

At the gates of the Shire, the four hobbits learn that ruffians, apparently acting under the orders of Frodo's cousin,have overrun the place. The mill has been torn down, factories have been built, and assorted atrocities have beencommitted. The four heroes, particularly Merry and Pippin, call the hobbit-folk to arms and defeat the blackguards(who, upon closer examination, bear a striking resemblance to the half-orc creations of Saruman that Merry andPippin saw at Isengard). The last step in overthrowing the bullies is to roust out their leader, who turns out to beSaruman, not Frodo's cousin at all. Not wishing to kill such a powerful being (who knows what sort of curse youcould bring down on yourself that way?), Frodo orders Saruman to leave the Shire. However, the badly abused

Wormtongue pulls a knife and slits the wizard's throat. Before Frodo can stop them, hobbit archers slay thewretched git. The War of the Ring ends on Frodo's front porch.

Remember the box of dirt that Galadriel gave to Sam? He uses the special magicElf dirt to repair the damage done to the Shire. There is also a seed in the box,which he plants in the meadow over Bag End. It grows into a huge "mallorn" tree

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like those in Lrien. He marries his childhood sweetheart, has a couple of kids,and they all move in with Frodo. Frodo, however, is not a happy camper. Beingstabbed, poisoned, bit, burned, and having his mind warped by the ultimate tokenof evil, have all left him with a sort of post-traumatic-epic-fantasy-shock-syndrome. After a couple of years, he and Sam ride off to the Gray Havens, wherethe Elves routinely ship off to Valinor, never to return. Along the way, they meetup with Gandalf, Elrond, Galadriel, and Bilbo. It seems that the remaining Ring-Bearers are all going to leave Middle-Earth and sail to Valinor, where they canfind peace. Merry and Pippin show up to wish them bon voyage, and to keep Sam

company on his trip home. As the grey Elf ship vanishes into the mists, Frodoholds the phial of Galadriel aloft. Sam goes home.

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Appendices.

There are six appendices at the end ofThe Lord of the Rings:

l Appendix A is a brief summary of the names and deeds of kings. This includes the Nmenrean kings, theGondor kings, the Arnor kings, and Dnedain chieftains, as well as some drivel about Dwarves. Of particularinterest in this section is "an excerpt from the Tale of Aragorn and Arwen," which fills in some of the gaps inthis romantic subplot. The end is particularly sad, in my opinion.

l Appendix B is the "Tale of Years," which gives a chronology of events leading up to the War of the Ring. Italso has a breakdown of the events in the novel, and a bit of information about what happened afterwards:Legolas and Gimli became great lords of their peoples, then sailed off to Valinor together; Aragorn ruled for along time then died (see Appendix A); omer also ruled as king for a while, then died; Sam became theMayor of the Shire for life and had something like a dozen kids; Merry became lord of Buckland; and Pippinbecame the Thain (the king's representative in the Shire).

l Appendix C contains hobbit family trees, for those who get a kick out of that sort of thing.

l Appendix D explains the hobbit calendar, and how it relates to other calendars.

l Appendix E has a bunch of cool "rune" alphabets.

l Appendix F contains a lot of linguistic information, as well as pronunciation guides for the names and placesused throughout the book. Now, I personally believe this would have been better put in the Foreward, ratherthan theAppendix, where nobody's going to see it until after they've been mispronouncing everything for1,500 pages.

There are also some indices regarding where you can find people, places, and things mentioned in the book.

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Bored of the Rings

If you go to the Ring Game, you are going to hear people referring to characters and places by names other thanthose that appear in The Lord of the Rings. Most of these can be traced to the tremendously funny parody ofTolkien's books entitledBored of the Rings, by the Harvard Lampoon. In this book, Frito Bugger (son of DildoBugger) must destroy the Great Dingus in the dreaded Zazu Pits of Fordor. He is accompanied by Spam, Moxie,Pepsi, Goodgulf, Arrowroot son of Arrowshirt (true king of Twodor), Gimlet, Legolam, and Bromosel. They are

pursued by the forces of Sorhed, betrayed by the evil entrepreneur Serutan, and trapped by Schlob (Sorhed's bloatedex-wife). Frito and Spam destroy the Nasty Thingamabob by using the oily Goddam as a dead weight and hurlinghim into a tar pit. Arrowroot marries Eorache (daughter of Eorlobe) and everybody goes home to play Scrabble.

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The Ring Game

What exactly is Ring Game? It is a live-action role-playinggame played twice a year in beautiful Governor Dodge StatePark in southern Wisconsin. At a meeting about two weeksbefore the game, players use a lottery system to selectcharacters. Everybody takes a number, numbers are drawn outof a hat, and when your number is drawn, you pick a characterfrom those that are left on the blackboard. Some players justshow up the day of the game to play generic characters likeorcs or men-at-arms.

Each player receives a certain number of points, based on threethings:

l The character they are playing. Men-at-arms and orcshave a base of 1012 points, "name" characters likeAragorn have 2030, while the wizards start in the 6080 range. Sauron starts out with 500 base points, but heis worth infinite points after 3:30 pm. Once upon a time,there were lots of restrictions on who could play whichcharacters (e.g., you had to be under 5'8" or so to play ahobbit; only women could play female characters, etc.).For the most part, those rules have all fallen by the wayside (in fact, it's become something of a running jokethat Arwen and Galadriel are often played by cross-dressers). The only restrictions left are: you must be over18 and have played in the previous game to be a wizard; you must have played the game at some time in thepast to play a hobbit; and you must be pre-approved by the judges to take the Menace as your character.

l How good their costume is. Costumes can earn a player 015 additional points. Average costumes run about69 pointsI've only seen a few fifteens in the years I've been playing, and those were truly outstandingcostumes.

l What armor and weapons they're carrying. Note that I said carryingno actual combat takes place. The typeand amount of weapons and armor a player wears determines how many extra points they receive. There is alimit of three weapons, and "real" armor and weapons earn double points.

Once everybody has signed in and gotten their points totaled up on a sheet by the judges, all the players are groupedtogether by teams and introductions are made. This is done for a number of reasons:

l To give everyone a chance to see all the costumes before they are torn to shreds by branches, brambles, andother natural hazards in the park.

l To make sure that everyone (everyone who's paying attention, that is) knows what all the characters look like.There's nothing more embarrassing than mistaking an Elf for a hobbit.

l To allow everyone to get into the spirit of the game by taunting the other team.

l To distribute tokens (see below).

l To make fun of Bill, one of the guys who runs the game. He's usually a good sport about it. Just watch out forhis whistle.

Tokens are little plastic cards on strings that people wear around their neck. They represent special events and/or

powers from the book. For example, Bilbo starts with the Sting token (which can automatically kill Shelob) and theMithril Shirt token (which adds points to any hobbit who carries it). If you are defeated in battle, the opposing teamcan plunder your tokens, except when they can't. There are exceptions to pretty much every rule in this game!

After introductions are made, everybody goes to their starting places, which are listed in the rule book. The gamestarts at 12:00 noon. Players cannot leave their starting place until then, except for Gandalf, who starts five minutes

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early. I toldyou there were exceptions to all the rules.

The object of the game is fairly simple:

l The Good team (led by Gandalf) is trying to get the Ring to the top of Mount Doom (a particularly nastyrocky knoll in the center of the park), to "destroy" it in the "Cracks of Doom."

l The Evil team (led by Sauron) is trying to capture the hobbits and take them to Sauron for interrogation andRing recovery.

l The "white hand" team (led by Saruman) is trying to win for themselves by capturing the Ring and touching itto the Cracks of Doom. They also win if the Evil team wins because, well, they're evil, too.

It is possible to have a tie. If the Good team doesn't destroy the Ring, and the Evil team does not capture all theGood citadels (see below), the game is declared a draw. This has happened only twice in Ring Game history: 1) Atthe Fall 1999 game, Good lost the final battle on Mount Doom, but Saruman chose to interrogate the wrong hobbit.The Evil team had neglected to capture Lothlrien, so the game was declared a draw. 2) At the Spring 2001 game,Sauron declared that he was going for a "Ring or nothing" victory, and so did not bother to take the Lothlrien flag.Once again, Good lost the battle on Mt. Doom, but Evil picked the wrong hobbit, leading to the second tie in fourgames.

Scattered about the park are flags that represent "citadels." For example, at the top of a hill about a half-mile fromMount Doom is the "Barad-dur" flag, representing Sauron's stronghold. Citadel flags usually have some point valueof their own, and give bonuses to players trying to defend them (e.g., white hand players double their point values atIsengard). Citadels really only matter if Good doesn't destroy the Ring and Evil doesn't capture it. If all the Goodcitadels have been captured, and the Ring isn't captured, Evil still wins by default. Each citadel has a designatedtime before which it cannot be attacked. Gondor, for instance, cannot be attacked until 1:30 pm. This has the effectof causing players to congregate in these spots for big battles at relatively predictable times, depending on teamstrategies.

Here's how "combat" in the game works in practice:

l A group from one team encounters a group from the other team.

l Somebody tags a player on the other side.

l The two sides total up who has the most points.

l The side that loses is "dead," and has to sit out for fifteen minutes.

l The winners capture tokens from the losers.

l If Evil is the winner, they can take up to half of the Good players as "prisoners," to be delivered to Sauron forquestioning.

This is a very simplified version of combat. I'm not even going to get into the wizard rules and all the exceptions ofthe various tokens. In Ring Game slang, defeating someone in combat is called "bouncing" them. For example, "wewere trying to decide which way to go when the Menace came out of the woods and bounced all of us!" Or,"Radagast said she's going to bounce the Lord of the Nazgl for being such a jerk."

Around 3:30 pm or so, virtually everyone shows up at Mount Doom. A circle of red streamers at the bottom of thehill presents a "perimeter" that Evil is not allowed to cross until Good does. Therefore, Evil usually surrounds themountain to see what ploy Good is going to use to get to the top. Good is not allowed to cross the perimeter until

3:30 pmthis is stilled called the "gentlemen's agreement," but it's really an ironclad rule. When Good is spottedcrossing the perimeter, the Evil team begins yelling "Good is on the Mountain!" and everyone charges uphill. A tagis made, battles and confusion ensue. Combat is resolved in the usual manner, although it takes longer than usualbecause of the sheer number of players involved. The winner of the "Mount Doom Battle" usually determines thegame winner, but odd results have been known to occur. Such as the time Saruman sauntered up Mount Doomunhindered by either team and casually touched the Ring to the Crack.

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After the game is over, everyone goes to the A&W in Dodgeville (occasionally, A&W is closed for the season andwe go to Culver's instead). The owners of the A&W usually plan their "closing for the winter" date around when thegame is scheduled, as long as it isn't too late in the year. After A&W, everybody drives back to Madison, takes ashower, grabs a bite to eat, and then goes to the official Ring Game party. There, the game is dissected in detail(e.g., "where were you at Gondor?" "Oh man, I got bounced by a Nazgl just as I was coming over the hill!"), liesare told, stories are swapped, and everyone has a rollicking good time.

For those who just can't stand to let their Ring Game experience end, there is also a breakfast the followingmorning. The location varies, usually decided at the party the night before. The breakfast is where the "cheese

grater" award is decided upon. Describing how the award got its name would be a violation of most ISP's rules ofservice, so I'll skip that. Suffice to say, it is given to the player who is determined to have done the mostboneheaded thing at the game. Past "winners" included a Lord of the Nazgl who blundered into an ambush,completely unaware of the rule that describes how owyn and Merry can team up to kill the Lord and reduce him tothe status of a mere orc for the remainder of the game. In the words of Bugs Bunny, "what a maroon!"

To view photo galleries from the past few Ring Games, visit the unofficial Ring Game Web Site!

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Second edition?

What happened to the first edition, you ask? Ah, therein lies the tale...

Back in 1994, I convinced a buddy of mine to attend Ring Game with me. He's a newspaper reporter, and thoughtthere might be a human interest story in it. The trouble was, he had never read The Lord of the Rings. I know whatyou're thinking (philistine!), but he's a great guy otherwise. To help him overcome this character deficiency, Idecided to write up a quick summary of the book for him. That was the first version of this little opus. By the way,the article never got written. Just didn't work out.

When I took on the self-appointed job of Ring Game webmaster in 1998, I began to receive occasional e-mails frompeople who were going to be playing in Ring Game, had never read the books, and wondering if I could "tell them alittle bit about [fill in character name here]." The piece from 1994 seemed the perfect thing to send, but alas, thedisk was long gone and all I had left was a photocopy. I tried scanning it into a .pdf file, but it just didn't fly. So, Idecided to redo the whole thing from scratch, and this is the result!

I hope you enjoyed it, and that if you haven't read the books, it might inspire you to do so. They really are very verygood, even if my summary is a bit on the flippant side. I welcome any constructive criticism [email protected].

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The Hobbit, The Lord of the Rings, and The Silmarillion are copyrights of The J.R.R. Tolkien Estate, Ltd. "Warrior& Dragon" illustration by J.R.R. Tolkien, The J.R.R. Tolkien Estate, Ltd. This summary and the illustrationsherein are 2000 Jack A. Barker. "In the Bleachers" 1995 Steve Moore.

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Lord of the Rings Summary