SAVING TVHS…ONE POOP AT A TIME

BIOMASS

TONOPAH VALLEY

Okay, WHAT?!Let me explain. Biomass is a super efficient form of energy that uses basically leftovers to

make energy, like sawdust, wood chips, leftover crops, dead trees, trash, and even manure! There are 2 ways we turn it to energy: 1. by burning the trash and compost and using the heat to boil water, thus making steam to turn turbines and make energy, OR 2. with landfill gas, in which a landfill is burned to collect the methane gas that is released in pipes, and then used to power the power plants. All this is done with trash and poop.

Cool, huh?

Now I get it! But how will we make it work?

SIMPLE! All TVHS would need is a few boilers, a decent amount of turbines, and some trash. LOTS OF TRASH! We

could use these things to power the school off poop and trash alone! The only problem is…..well, it won’t be the most

decent smelling energy source out there. Let’s face it, it will smell. A LOT. But it is clean and efficient, and would keep us

powered for a very long time. We could save enough on electricity to actually have field trips!

Where would we get the resources to power the turbines?

You do know there’s a cow farm right next door, right?There’s enough manure in there t power 20 TVHS’s! We could use a system of some sort, maybe some piping or a few trucks, to bring in manure for use to burn. There are also many, many fields that could supply dead crops, and just as many dead plants to burn, it being a desert and all. Community service awaits! We could even siphon the poop from our school bathrooms to burn!

But how would this change our beautiful school?

NOTHING! Well, not on the OUTSIDE. Okay, maybe a little on the outside. The turbines could be hidden in sheds, and the pipelines would obviously be underground. Like I said before, it might smell, but nothing helps you focus on math like burning trash!

Okay, I’m bought. Sign me up. I LOVE the smell of burning garbage anyways! How’s our coolio

school gonna look after the makeover?Like THIS! We would have a pipeline to transport the poop from the cow farm, and could hire the farmers to

transport old crops, where they would be burnt in our biomass

boilers for energy!

TVHS

COW FARM

OLD CROPS

BIOMASS BOILERS

THE ENDNO PUN INTENDED