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8/6/2019 Learning to Read and Write_Douglas
http://slidepdf.com/reader/full/learning-to-read-and-writedouglas 1/4
LearningtoReadandWritebyFrederickDouglass I lived in Master Hugh's family about seven years. During this time, I succeeded inlearningtoreadandwrite.Inaccomplishingthis,Iwascompelledtoresorttovariousstratagems.Ihadnoregularteacher.Mymistress,whohadkindlycommencedtoinstruct
me,had,incompliancewiththeadviceanddirectionofherhusband,notonlyceasedtoinstruct, but had set her face against my being instructed by anyone else. It is due,however,tomymistresstosayofher,thatshedidnotadoptthiscourseoftreatmentimmediately.Sheatfirstlackedthedepravityindispensabletoshuttingmeupinmentaldarkness. It was at least necessary for her to have some training in the exercise ofirresponsible power, tomake her equal to the task of treatingme as though Iwere abrute.Mymistresswas,asIhavesaid,akindandtender‐heartedwoman;andinthesimplicityof her soul she commenced, when I first went to live with her, to treat me as she
supposed one human being ought to treat another. In entering upon the duties of aslaveholder,shedidnotseemtoperceivethatIsustainedtohertherelationofamerechattel, and that for her to treat me as a human being was not only wrong, butdangerouslyso.Slaveryprovedasinjurioustoherasitdidtome.WhenIwentthere,she was a pious, warm, and tender‐hearted woman. There was no sorrow or suffering for which she had not a tear. She had bread for the hungry, clothes for the naked, andcomfortforeverymournerthatcamewithinherreach.Slaverysoonproveditsabilitytodivestheroftheseheavenlyqualities.Underitsinfluence,thetenderheartbecamestone,andthelamb‐Iikedispositiongavewaytooneoftiger‐likefierce‐ness.Thefirststepinherdownwardcoursewasinherceasingtoinstructme.Shenowcommencedtopracticeherhusband'sprecepts.Shefinallybecameevenmoreviolentinheroppositionthanher
husbandhimself.Shewasnotsatisfiedwithsimplydoingaswellashehadcommanded;sheseemedanxioustodobetter.Nothingseemedtomakehermoreangrythantoseeme withanewspaper.Sheseemedtothinkthatherelaythedanger.Ihavehadherrushatmewithafacemadeallupoffury,andsnatchfrommeanewspaper,inamannerthatfully revealed her apprehension. She was an apt woman; and a little experience soondemonstrated, to her satisfaction, that education and slavery were incompatible witheachother.FromthistimeIwasmostnarrowlywatched.IfIwasinaseparateroomanyconsiderablelengthoftime,Iwassuretobesuspectedofhavingabook,andwasatoncecalledtogive
an account ofmyself. All this, however, was too late. The first step had been taken.Mistress, inteachingmethealphabet,hadgivenmetheinch,andnoprecautioncouldpreventmefromtakingtheell.The plan which I adopted, and the one by which I wasmost successful, was that ofmakingfriendsofallthelittlewhiteboyswhomImetinthestreet.AsmanyoftheseasIcould,Iconvertedintoteachers.Withtheirkindlyaid,obtainedatdifferenttimesandin
different places, I finally succeededin learning to read.When Iwas sent toerrands, I
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alwaystookmybookwithme,andbydoingonepartofmyerrandquickly,Ifoundtimetogetalessonbeforemyreturn.Iusedalsotocarrybreadwithme,enoughofwhichwasalwaysinthehouse,andtowhichIwasalwayswelcome;forIwasmuchbetteroffinthisregardthanmanyofthepoorwhitechildreninourneighborhood.ThisbreadIusedtobestowuponthehungrylittleurchins,who,inreturn,wouldgivemethatmorevaluable
breadofknowledge.Iamstronglytemptedtogivethenamesoftwoorthreeofthoselittle boys, as a testimonial of the gratitude and affection I bear them; but prudenceforbids‐notthatitwouldinjureme,~butitmightembarrassthem;foritisalmostanunpardonableoffensetoteachslavestoreadinthisChristiancountry.Itisenoughtosayofthedearlittlefellows,thattheylivedonPhilpotStreet,verynearDurginandBailey'sshipyard.Iusedtotalkthismatterofslaveryoverwiththem.Iwouldsometimessaytothem,IwishedIcouldbeasfreeastheywouldbewhentheygottobemen."Youwillbefreeassoonasyouaretwenty‐one,butIamaslaveforlife!HavenotIasgoodarighttobefreeasyouhave?"Thesewordsusedtotroublethem;theywouldexpressformetheliveliestsympathy,andconsolemewiththehopethatsomethingwouldoccurbywhichI
mightbefree.Iwasnowabouttwelve‐years‐old,andthethoughtofbeingaslaveforlifebegantobearheavilyuponmyheart.Justaboutthistime,Igotholdofabookentitled"TheColumbianOrator." Every opportunity I got, I used to read this book. Among much of otherinterestingmatter,Ifoundinitadialoguebetweenamasterandhisslave.Theslavewasrep‐resentedashavingrunawayfromhismasterthreetimes.Thedialoguerepresentedtheconversationwhichtookplacebetweenthem,whentheslavewasretakenthethirdtime.In thisdialogue,thewholeargument inbehalfofslaverywasbroughtforwardbythemaster,allofwhichwasdisposedofbytheslave.Theslavewasmadetosaysomeverysmartas,wellasimpressivethingsinreplytohismaster‐thingswhichhadthede‐sired
thoughunexpectedeffect;fortheconversationresultedinthevoluntaryemancipationoftheslaveonthepartofthemaster.In the same book, Imetwith one ofSheridan'smighty speeches on and in behalf ofCatholicemancipation.Thesewerechoicedocumentstome.Ireadthemoverandoveragainwithunabatedinterest.Theygavetonguetointerestingthoughtsofmyownsoul, whichhadfrequentlyflashedthroughmymind,anddiedawayforwantofutterance.ThemoralwhichIgainedfromthedialoguewasthepoweroftruthovertheconscienceofevenaslaveholder.WhatIgotfromSheridanwasabolddenunciationofslavery,andapowerful vindicationofhumanrights.Thereading of thesedocuments enabledmeto
uttermythoughts,andtomeettheargumentsbroughtforwardtosustainslavery;but whiletheyrelievedmeofonedifficulty,theybroughtonanotherevenmorepainfulthantheoneofwhichIwasrelieved.ThemoreIread,themoreIwasledtoabhoranddetestmyenslavers.Icouldregardtheminnootherlightthanabandofsuccessfulrobbers, whohadlefttheirhomes,andgonetoAfrica,andstolenusfromourhomes,andinastrangelandreducedustoslavery.Iloathedthemasbeingthemeanestaswellasthemost wicked of men. As I read and contemplated the subject, behold that very
discontentmentwhichMasterHughhadpredictedwouldfollowmylearningtoreadhad
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alreadycome,totormentandstingmysoultounutterableanguish.AsIwrithedunderit,Iwouldattimesfeelthatlearningtoreadhadbeenacurseratherthanablessing.Ithadgivenmeaviewofmywretchedcondition,withouttheremedy.Itopenedmyeyestothehorriblepit,buttonoladderuponwhichtogetout.Inmomentsofagony,Ienviedmyfellow‐slaves for their stupidity. I have often wishedmyself a beast. I preferred the
condition of themeanest reptile to my own. Anything, no matterwhat, to get rid ofthinking!Itwasthiseverlastingthinkingofmyconditionthattormentedme.Therewasno getting rid of it. It was pressed upon me by every object within sight or hearing,animate or inanimate. The silver trump of freedom had roused my soul to eternal wakefulness.Freedomnowappeared,todisappearnomoreforever.Itwasheardineverysound,andseenineverything.Itwaseverpresenttotormentmewithasenseofmy wretchedcondition.Isawnothingwithoutseeingit,Iheardnothingwithouthearingit,and felt nothing without feeling it. It looked from every star, it smiled in every calm,breathedineverywind,andmovedineverystorm.
Ioftenfoundmyselfregrettingmyownexistence,andwishingmyselfdead;andbutforthe hope ofbeing free, I have no doubtbut that I shouldhave killedmyself, or donesomethingforwhichIshouldhavebeenkilled.Whileinthisstateofmind,Iwaseagertohearanyonespeakofslavery.Iwasareadylistener.Everylittlewhile,Icouldhearsome‐thingabouttheabolitionists.ItwassometimebeforeI foundwhatthewordmeant. It wasalwaysusedinsuchconnectionsastomakeitaninterestingwordtome.Ifaslaveranawayandsucceededingettingclear,orifaslavekilledhismaster,setfiretoabarn,ordidanythingverywronginthemindofaslaveholder,itwasspokenofasthefruitofabolition.Hearing theword inthis connectionveryoften,I set about learningwhat itmeant.Thedictionaryaffordedmelittleornohelp.Ifounditwas"theactofabolishing";butthenIdidnotknowwhatwastobeabolished.HereIwasperplexed.Ididnotdareto
askanyoneaboutitsmeaning,forIwassatisfiedthatitwassomethingtheywantedmetoknowverylittleabout.Afterapatientwaiting,Igotoneofourcitypapers,containinganaccountofthenumberofpetitionsfromtheNorth,prayingfortheabolitionofslaveryinthe District ofColumbia, and of the slave trade between the States. From this time Iunderstoodthewordsabolitionandabolitionist,andalwaysdrewnearwhenthatword wasspoken,expectingtohearsomethingofimportancetomyselfandfellow‐slaves.Thelightbrokeinuponmebydegrees.IwentonedaydownonthewharfofMr.Waters;andseeingtwoIrishmenunloadingascowofstone,Iwent,unasked,andhelpedthem.When wehadfinished,oneofthemcametomeandaskedmeifIwereaslave.ItoldhimIwas.Heasked,"Areyeaslaveforlife?"ItoldhimthatIwas.ThegoodIrishmanseemedtobe
deeplyaffectedbythestatement.Hesaidtotheotherthatitwasapitysofinealittlefellowasmyselfshouldbeaslaveforlife.Hesaiditwasashametoholdme.TheybothadvisedmetorunawaytotheNorth;thatIshouldfindfriendsthere,andthatIshouldbefree.Ipretendednottobeinterestedinwhattheysaid,andtreatedthemasifIdidnotunderstandthem;forIfearedtheymightbetreacherous.Whitemenhavebeenknowntoencourageslavestoescape,andthen,togetthereward,catchthemandreturnthemtotheir masters. I was afraid that these seemingly good men might use me so; but I
nevertheless remembered their advice, and from that time I resolved to run away. I
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lookedforwardtoatimeatwhichitwouldbesafeformetoescape.Iwastooyoungtothinkofdoingsoimmediately;besides,Iwishedtolearnhowtowrite,asImighthaveoccasiontowritemyownpass.IconsoledmyselfwiththehopethatIshouldonedayfindagoodchance.Meanwhile,Iwouldlearntowrite.
TheideaastohowImightlearntowritewassuggestedtomebybeinginDurginandBailey'sship‐yard,andfrequentlyseeingtheshipcarpenters,afterhewing,andgettingapieceoftimberreadyforuse,writeonthetimberthenameofthatpartoftheshipfor which it was intended.When apieceof timber was intended for the larboard side, it wouldbemarkedthus‐"L."Whenapiecewasforthestarboardside,itwouldbemarkedthus‐‐S.F." A piece for the larboard side forward, would bemarked thus‐"L.F." Whenapiecewasforstarboardsideforward,itwouldbemarkedthus‐"S.F."Forlarboardaft,it would bemarkedthus‐"L.A." For starboard aft, itwouldbemarkedthus‐"S.A." I soonlearnedthenamesoftheseletters,andforwhattheywereintendedwhenplaceduponapieceoftimberintheshipyard.Iimmediatelycommencedcopyingthem,andinashort
timewasabletomakethefourlettersnamed.Afterthat,whenImetwithanyboywhoIknewcouldwrite,IwouldtellhimIcouldwriteaswellashe.Thenextwordwouldbe,"1don'tbelieveyou.Letmeseeyoutryit."IwouldthenmaketheletterswhichIhadbeensofortunateastolearn,andaskhimtobeatthat.InthiswayIgotagoodmanylessonsin writing,whichitisquitepossibleIshouldneverhavegotteninanyotherway.Duringthistime,mycopy‐bookwastheboardfence,brickwall,andpavement;mypenandink wasalumpofchalk.Withthese,Ilearnedmainlyhowtowrite.Ithencommencedandcontinuedcopying the Italics inWebster's SpellingBook,until I couldmake them all withoutlookinginthebook.Bythistime,mylittleMasterThomashadgonetoschool,andlearnedhowtowrite,andhadwrittenoveranumberofcopy‐books.Thesehadbeenbrought home, and shown to some of our near neighbors, and then laid aside. My
mistress used to go to classmeeting at theWilk Streetmeeting‐house everyMondayafternoon,andleavemetotakecareofthehouse.Whenleftthus,IusedtospendthetimeinwritinginthespacesleftinmasterThomas'scopy‐book,copyingwhathehad written.IcontinuedtodothisuntilIcouldwriteahandverysimilartothatofMasterThomas.Thus,afteralong,tediouseffortforyears,Ifinallysucceededinlearninghowto write.Takenfrom:http://www.gibbsmagazine.com/learning%20to%20read.htm