Jilian Oder_final.pdf

4/16/2015 Jilian Oder

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Jilian Oder on mobile

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William ConstantinoI'll be hereFeb 23

Jilian OderI hated waking up with out you today Feb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderIt's pretty dead here. I'm sure that will change Feb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino

Feb 23

Jilian OderGuess I don't have to worry about you thinking about me That was a good dayFeb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderFeeling pretty unsexy today Feb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThat's bullshit. Why's that?You're one of the last people I can think of that should be feeling unsexy Feb 23

Jilian OderClogged ear, crusty skin, sour mood , no period yetLots of reasonsFeb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino

9+

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No period, huh?Feb 23

Jilian OderYeah I fucking knowI should really get on checking into thatFeb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoAbout how late would you say you are?Like, max?Feb 23

Jilian OderMax 10 daysOr one day early from normal monthly until last monthSo that's why the confusionI know another thing to worry about I'll buy a test today so we can stop thinking about it5 min smoke break nowFeb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoOk. I was certainly going to suggest that if you still hadn't got it by Wednesday Feb 23

Jilian OderI've never been this late but also I'm not feeling anything different than regular pmsSo I've been worried/not ?Certainly since my cycle was weird last monthYou seem calm about itFeb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoFear and panic tend to only have deleterious effects Feb 23

Jilian OderThis is trueFeb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderThe mentality I've been going withWell I'll keep you updatedAnd we'll keep talkingFeb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino

Feb 23

Jilian Oder
























Feb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderAnother quick 5. Lunch at 2 I imagineHow are you today ? I've been ranting but how's stuff ?Feb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoNot bad. Waiting to hear back from Wayfair about what time my appointment is. Confirmed my NPappointment for tomorrow so I can get a prescription refill.Also, it's me and Molly's anniversary today.Which we almost always forget until the day of Feb 23

Jilian OderOh so probably not a phone call day Happy anneversaryI was kind of thinking of calling you on my lunch actuallyMight be a good idea if you have plans tonightFeb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoDoesn't rule out later, but I'd like to talk to you on your lunch if you can Feb 23

Jilian OderOk coolLunch and bedtime would be a real treat I'll call you at 2 thenFeb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderEarly lunchCan you still talk ?Feb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoAbsolutely Feb 23

Jilian OderThat list only begins the things I want to do with youIt's exciting to think about fun things I want with youAlso out anneversary I feel will be a confusing thing to figure out Feb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoAlready though that thoughtthought!Feb 23

Jilian Oder
























Jilian OderHeheFeb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderWell it's either 2/14 or 2/20 if you count breaking upOr we could go by first kissThat's like 12/27? Maybe ?Feb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino12/31?Feb 23

Jilian OderOh maybeIt was late night on a Friday or early sat morningFeb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoEarly WednesdayFeb 23

Jilian OderBut no titles until early 2/14Oh I have a dated photo from the first night I slept overI'll check12/27 by kissSo you choose Gentlema choice !Feb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThat night by MIT was pretty good too Feb 23

Jilian Oder12/28Feb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderAnd yes it wasI like that it's photo documentedYou have got to scare me at work again soon before you start this job I miss you hereFeb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoIn the plans Feb 23

Jilian Oder

























12/27, then it's not messing with any holidays where we might need to be apart/have other stuffattached ?Feb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderJust saying


Jilian OderThere's burlesque all weekend queer themed at midway Saturday and biblical themed at OberonSundayI'm ish about either but just saying I may also wanna up dancing SaturdayJust letting you know my ideas, just in case Feb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian Oder10:30/11?Feb 23 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian Oderok my love, i'm in bed once again, this time I WILL have the phone on me with sound if i fall asleep.i should be up till 12/12:30 or so, but would love to talk earlier if you are freeFeb 23 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoStill awake?Feb 24

Jilian OderYep Feb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI'll be free soon. About 1520 minutes. Feb 24

Jilian OderOk love you call meFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderThanks for all of that booOops wrong messageThat was for muffinLolCalling soon ?Feb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino
























YepFeb 24

William Constantino

Feb 24

Jilian Oder..heyFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI'm headed to work but I'll be hereFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderHope you are doing okFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderMorning ?Feb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoAfternoonFeb 24

Jilian OderWas afraid you weren't talking to me . How are you ?Feb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoMeh. Didn't sleep last night until early this morning. Then overslept for my appointment.Feb 24

Jilian OderI'm sorryFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI'm going on lunch you want to talk ?Feb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoSure



















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Feb 24

Jilian OderOk I'll call in a fewFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino

Feb 24

Jilian OderOmgFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino

Feb 24

William Constantino

Feb 24

William ConstantinoI'm sorry that didn't go wellFeb 24

Jilian OderI think I'm going to leave workFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino




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William ConstantinoYou want to try the phone again?Feb 24

Jilian OderGive me a minute to get out of herdFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI don't want this to destroy you. Or either of us. No matter what. Feb 24

Jilian OderPhone conversations in the outer lobby onlyFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI wish I had your hand to holdI feel really scared but like I total badass for even being able to do this right nowFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI do wish I was there for you right now And you are a badass Feb 24

Jilian OderI'm a teary badassMan I need to peeBut I feel I should save itFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderTortureFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThey're not going to do a blood test?Feb 24

Jilian OderBothProbablyI'll request bothThe one they do with pee is not much better than the one I gotFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderNo blood tests here but I've been assured the urine will tell us what we need to knowFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian Oder



























Waiting now for resultsFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoOkhttp://i.imgur.com/Qd84zYul.jpgFeb 24

Jilian OderPage not foundThere is a dude vaping in the waiting roonRoomThis place is classyFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderWhat were you trying to send me?Feb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoShould load...it loaded for mehttp://i.imgur.com/Qd84zYul.jpgFeb 24

Jilian OderNopeI had to get away from the YouTube videos played on speaker and the vaping dudeGrating my nervesOh just saw itFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderCopying and pasting it workedVaping guy just returned my stuff I left near himWtfLife is weirdFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoQuite a motley crew in there, eh?Just spent an hour on the phone with my dadFeb 24

Jilian OderOh yeah ?Feb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYeah. He's doing much better.Feb 24

Jilian Oder

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That's good.Feb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoStill waiting?Feb 24

Jilian OderJust leftFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWant to talk?Feb 24

Jilian OderYesFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantinohttp://imgur.com/gallery/cZVKjz2Feb 24

Jilian OderThings went great with momI'm supported no matter whatFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderHope all is going ok with study timeI found out my mom will be home but sleeping post procedure tomorrowWe can still hang here and close the door and that's okIf that's ok with youFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian Oderi'm going to bed. i'll talk to you in the morning and see you tomorrowFeb 24 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderi hope you get some rest. good luck tomorrow.Feb 24 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderMorningFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderHope all goes awesome and hope to still see you at 2Feb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino















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I'll be thereFeb 25

Jilian OderHow'd it go ???Feb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoIt's tomorrowFeb 25

Jilian OderOh rightFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderJesusListen to meBeen like this all dayMemory is shitFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoAny chance I can talk you into dinner at James' Gate tonight?Feb 25

Jilian OderI could be into it yeahI just gotta be in by 9Feb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderAnd I'd like to go home for a little firstFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThat's doable provided we get there relatively early.Feb 25

Jilian OderTotallyWe can get there in 25 if the d and the bus act rationallyI think that could be niceYeah need showerAnd lying down and watching something before maybeFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI just want to be around youThat sound ok ?Feb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino


























William ConstantinoWas about to ask what you felt like watching Feb 25

Jilian OderWe can figure that together Feb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoSo, I've actually got to go to the bank. Which means I'm running behind schedule. I figure there's afew ways this can be handled...Feb 25

Jilian OderGive me optionsFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI could head to your house directly from there. That way I'd probably get there only a little behindyou. The other option would be to wait for me?Feb 25

Jilian OderOk no first one sounds goodI'll meet you thereFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoAlright. Thanks. Feb 25

Jilian OderAt my houseNot a problemFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantinohttp://sites.harvard.edu/~wuensch/T/subwaymap.htmlFeb 25

Jilian OderThat way if I have to wait it can be thereFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderOoohOk love see you in a littleKeep me updatedFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderHalfway home

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How goes the mission ?Feb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoOn my wayAt DudleyFeb 25

Jilian OderCoolFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThis traffic sucks Feb 25

Jilian OderBummerFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoOn the 66. Gonna switch to the C at Coolidge. Just past Brookline Village now.Feb 25

Jilian OderCoolFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoAbout to be on the CFeb 25

Jilian OderAwesomeFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI know shit is weird but I'm really excited to see youFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoFound somebody's bank card on the street, so I played good Samaritan and called their bank forthem.Feb 25

Jilian OderThat's nice Feb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWhat am I supposed to do?Feb 25




























Jilian OderI'm hereFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoAnd I'm at your back door Feb 25

Jilian OderWe can talk on the phoneFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI don't think we should talk in personNot tonightFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYet again, I disagreeGive me that at least?Feb 25

Jilian OderI'm sorry I'm finished for today . We can talk on the phone if you wantOr text hereFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThat's how you feel?Feb 25

Jilian OderI want so much more than what you can give meFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoIf you won't see me then there's little to offer.Feb 25

Jilian OderI will see you just not today. I can meet you in a neutral space another timeFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoPlease provide your test results from Planned Parenthood before discussing anything further withme.I see no reason to see you otherwise. I have no confidence that you in your fidelity, or that you areengaging me in good faith.My grammar's usually better, but this keypad is wet.As far as I'm concerned, you are ending any discussions.Feb 25

























Jilian OderI'm ending in person discussions tonightI will talk on the phoneOr in textFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoNot negotiableIn person was offered.Since that was rejected, no other offers are forthcomingIf you aren't pregnant, we certainly have nothing further to discuss.Feb 25

Jilian OderI understandI will get results to youFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoPlease do. And that's just the opening to any further discussions we might have. That's not aguarantee.Feb 25

Jilian OderI understandI'll get that to you asap it's not available onlineFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoLook kidI'm feeling better already. Now I don't feel so alone.Feb 25

Jilian OderOkWhy's that ?Out of curiosityFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoListening to my wife's anguish here. You remember her, right? The one we were all fucking in bed?Please, let me know if that slipped your mind at all.And yeah, the phone wasn't working for me. Hoping you find chat more agreeable.Feb 25

William ConstantinoUnfortunately, I wish we had more to discuss. I feel all you want from me is affirmation. If I had noabsolutely no chance of being a parent here, and I was just your friend, I know I'd want to say youwere making a poor decision. But honestly, if I was just your friend? I'm not sure I actually would.Feb 25

Jilian Oder























Jilian OderOkFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderChats ok I'm hereI'm sorry I was away for a moment doing choresBut I'm hereI'm sorry you are both going through this I understand if you don't believe meFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThis is fucking Looney Tunes from our perspective. I sure you can understand.Feb 25

Jilian OderI canFeb 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI'm feeling like I'm in a much better spotFeb 25

Jilian Odergoodwanna tell me about it?Feb 25 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI have what I need to move forwardFeb 25

Jilian Oderthat's good newscare to elaborate?Feb 25 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoNot sure now is the best time for that.Feb 25

Jilian Oderthat's alright.Feb 25 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoJust so you don't think anything weird, it's between Molly and I.Feb 25

Jilian Oderok,Feb 25 ∙ Sent from Web



























William ConstantinoStill awake?Guess we'll talk sometime soon thenFeb 26

Jilian OderYeah. Passed out. We'll keep talking of courseFeb 26 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYou're out at 2 today?Feb 26

Jilian OderI am why do you ask ?Feb 26 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoJust figuring out when you might be available to talk later.Feb 26

Jilian OderRight on yeahGoing to planned parenthood to get you that document right afterThen home I'll need to make some calls about insurance but I'll be free to talkWant me to call you when I get out ?Feb 26 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoNo. I'll let you know when I'm free.Feb 26

Jilian OderSounds good ball is totally in your court for when you feel like talkingFeb 26 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI'm not going to attempt to start conversation per your requestFeb 26 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderJust called backFeb 26 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoHey. Where're you at?Feb 26

Jilian OderHomeMaking important calls



























But homeFeb 26 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWell, let me know when you have some timeFeb 26

Jilian OderI can talk as soon as i'm off the phone herei'm on holdso i can chat here for a second if you want. but otherwise phone free soonI got masshealth.Feb 26 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoJust let me know when you're free to talkFeb 26

Jilian OderokFeb 26 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderI can talk nowFeb 26 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian Oder


Jilian Oder



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Jilian OderThey didn't include Sti results but I can get them when they have my medical info from old doctorwill get on that business hours tomorrow hopefully have that to you by next weekFeb 26 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI have my first midwife visit at the cambridge womens center/birth center next thursday evening. It'sthe first kind of visit you do before all the super medical stuff. Keeping you updated as requestedFeb 27 ∙ Sent from Web

William Constantino

Feb 28

Jilian OderI know I'm not supposed to reach out to you but I really just wanted to say hello.Mar 5 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderHad my first appointment today. Got a bunch of blood testing to make sure my thyroid/ironcontent/etc are in good order and some early genetic testing. Everything is going well as far asphysical exam. Quitting nicotine as we speak. If possible, the birth center would love to be able tospeak to you about some of your medical history, if you want, if not it's okay, but you can call. Letme know if you want that information to get in contact with them. I can give it to you. I'm headed toa nutritionist in 2 weeks to make sure i'm eating correctly and to the midwife again in 4 weeks foranother exam. I'll be getting more genetic testing and early risk factor testing in about 6 weeks. I'llhave the results of todays tests hopefully within a few weeks, and will forward that to you.








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Mar 5 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderI'll be out of town saturdaytuesday in western mass, then again next fridaysunday in new york, buti'll be free to chat or phone call when away or in between if you need to.Mar 5 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoNo need. And don't say hello.Mar 5

Jilian OderShould i stop sending this sort of information as well?I'll just assume that if you want updates you'll ask for them. Sorry to have bothered you.Mar 5 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI have 2 photo albums of yours here. I'll arrange to have then returned to you.Mar 5

Jilian Oderi'd appreciate that.Mar 5 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoJust tried calling youMar 6

Jilian OderI'm at work til 5What's up?Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoOk. I'll try back after then.Mar 6

Jilian OderAlrightMar 6 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThanksMar 6

William ConstantinoSorry. Circumstances got away from me. However, I'd like to talk to you soon.Mar 6

Jilian OderI figured as muchMar 6 ∙ Sent from Messenger



























Jilian OderYeah whenever you'd like to let me know.I'll let you know if I'm freeLike I said travelling SaturdayTuesday with social obligation but there will be time in betweenMar 6 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoIs it contentious to ask why you unfriended me?Mar 6

Jilian OderIt didn't seem like you wanted to be my friend.I thought you were done talking with me, i got frustrated i guess, felt like purging facebook as a wayto help that frustrationI saw your photo afterwards, that didn't especially help.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderThough you likely don't want to hear it, i miss you like crazy, and it's hard missing you and seeingyour name on a side bar every day.i didn't block you so we'd have a chance to talk if you wanted to talk.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThat...well, that might be the single best photo I feel I ever took. Not great. Maybe even a cliche.But it came out well. And was representative of pain.Mar 6

Jilian OderI understood itMar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoMiss me? Fuck....Mar 6

Jilian Oderit is really a great photo.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI've missed you.Mar 6

William ConstantinoAnd that sucks to even admitMar 6

Jilian OderThat makes me both sad and glad.I'm so sorry things are the way they are.


























William ConstantinoWe're both in that spotAnd Molly too. See...We can talk about our own pain and doubt. If I don't share this with her, she's alone. And shedoesn't deserve that.Mar 6

Jilian OderI know thatMar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderi agree with that.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoAnd this hurts her.Mar 6

Jilian OderI know, we're all feeling hurt.and i hate that.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoHit delete instead of send

Mar 6

Jilian Oderhm?Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoStillMar 6

Jilian Oderoh too many messages at once i get it.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI was drunk the other night and actually wrote to MuffinJust told her that I was "in a spot"Mar 6

Jilian Oderhow'd that go?Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William Constantino



























William ConstantinoDidn't look at her response for 2 daysWhen I actually did, I read it to Molly.Mar 6

William ConstantinoI wrote an entire reply...Then just blocked herNot personalIt was just...Well, she's your friendMar 6

Jilian Odershe is.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoShe's only heard from youMar 6

William ConstantinoAnd I didn't feel right taking thatI wrote a whole fucking treatiseMar 6

Jilian OderI think if you'd let her she'd listen to you. she's good like that. and not really a sidetaker.but that's your call.well..was what you wrote any good>?Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoMe and you might just have much to discuss. It's not all bad. It's not all good.Mar 6

Jilian Oderi'd like that.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderI don't think any converstion you and i have ever had has beenuncomplicatedMar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThe worst that I didn't write? Let me see how'd she deal with Alex accidentally knocking up EmilyFae. Then...See? Not very constructive, is it? To be fair, everything I wrote didn't include that at all.Mar 6

Jilian OderI see.


























William ConstantinoThat photo of the book wasn't born out of regret or resentment. My fucking soul feels like it'sburning here.Mar 6

Jilian OderI hear that.very much so.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderI don't know what you think about how i' m feeling, but i have a share of pain as well.I know it doesn't match to yours and mollys. I understand that now.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoIt's bad. I've needed some space from you. Hence why I was upset when you wrote "hello".Mar 6

Jilian Oderbut i've never been lonlier.I know, and i wrote hello because i couldn't bear to not say anything to you for any longer, it wasselfish.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThen had doubts whether I wanted updates from youI told you what I neededMar 6

Jilian OderI knowMar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoLook..I understandMar 6

Jilian Oderi really was pretty good for awhile there.granted.Life without you is not easy.you were not only my lover but one of my best friends, and i hate this.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoFor a while? I feel you're making decisions that last a lifetime. I needed time and you lasted oneweek. Hold on...Mar 6























Jilian OderokMar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThis is what really hurts!Mar 6

Jilian Oderi know that.I'm sorry i broke my promise to you with the contact thing.it was a stupid move.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoMe and you are supposed to be seeing Chappie tonight. We're supposed to go to New York witheach other. You were supposed to be here, in my house, with me lay weekend.Mar 6

William ConstantinoLast, not layBut now...I grieveMar 6

Jilian OderAnd i do too.And it tears me apart that following one part of my heart derails the other partMar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI'm not suggesting you should've been laissez faire about an abortionBut that...I could've been there for youMar 6

William ConstantinoWithout compunctionWithout reservationMar 6

Jilian OderI understand that.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoWith regret. Not relief.But you explicitly laid out to Molly what your intentions were. And this...If this is my child andcarrying it to term. Regardless of my feelings, this is what she feared about you come to pass.I'm not argueing with youKeep in mindMar 6























William ConstantinoNot telling you that you owe anybody anythingBut this is her worst fear. And I vouched for your intentions.Mar 6

Jilian OderAlright. I guess when i spoke to molly I didn't really have this in mind, I'm aware i hurt her, and ihate that. but this wasn't in the plans.as you might know.Shit i dont even know if she'd been like 'and if you got pregnant' that i would of had an answer thenit seemed so far awaylord was i ignorantMar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoWe did talk about this. I guess I accepted an ambiguous answer as a definite.My badMar 6

Jilian OderI don't remember having that talk.again, i'm not trying to argue either.just being honestMar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI knew you were worried about getting older. When I mentioned it to you, you talked about beingjust out of a relationship with Brett. And living with your mom...And not really knowing where youwere at.Mar 6

Jilian Oderwas this back in october?Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThat's what we nebulousy discussed the only time we discussed what could happen.No. Later. The only other time it came up was when I asked by you didn't use protection withBrendan.Your answer was "Because I wanted cock!" Mar 6

Jilian Oderwell yeah i was mad and it seemed like a truthful answerMar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI don't blame you...But that seriously was your answer!Mar 6

Jilian Oder























i'm a perverted human, it's true.I remember.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderNothing if not a sexual human.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoSure. So am I.Mar 6

Jilian OderI wouldn't of guessed ;oMar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThis situation...This ain't about perversion.You wouldn't have guessed?Mar 6

Jilian OderI agreeabout you being a sexual hunmanMar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderi was jokingof course.why not laugh when you're already burning in the flames of hellMar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYou see what I changed my profile picture to?Mar 6

Jilian OderI did/and mine is me and frannie because it's my best friend at the moment. gross cat life.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoLast summer. I thought Brittonie took it, but she corrected me that it was actually Roddy.Mar 6

Jilian OderRight on. It's a good one. i like the sign and it works.I'm not sure what to say now.There's lots i want to saybut i'm trying to be really careful.also having feelings without nicotine the first time since 1999 is really....harrowing.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web
























William ConstantinoTrying to be careful? I think I might unfortunately feel the same way...I've been worried unless Iagree with you 100%, I risk alienating myself from your decision heading. Actually, I've feared that'salready happened. Making, not headingMar 6

William ConstantinoI've felt the need to talk to you...But worried it would just be adversarial...And I've missed you too...but that there's been such a gulf between usOne that seemed like it would only get worse, not betterMar 6

Jilian Oderi'm feeling heartsick and heartbroken every day. I'm trying to be calm and super strong, but lifewithout you is ...not quite right.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI think I understand your fears and desires, but that you don't understand mine. And that you couldcopy and paste that sentiment and send it to me yourself.Mar 6

Jilian OderYeah i guess i could.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderso i guess then we do understand then.if we both feel the same way then we both understand in a way, without fully understanding.It truly sucks that doing what is right for our hearts tears us apart.because I hate not being able to share a part of my heart with you.I feel so truly alone, and i know you feel the same.or maybe i'm assuming.see you're getting some unedited now, let me know if it's too muchMar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoNo, it's fine.I told my dad what was up the other night.Mar 6

Jilian Oderoh wow.want to tell me how that went ? it's ok if you don't.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI got out of the car and he called me back. He said "I don't know what you're thinking son, but I'mnot telling Linda. This is too weird."





















Mar 6

Jilian Oderha.#dadreactionsMar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoLinda is my stepmother. You met her once.Mar 6

Jilian Odermine was like 'well i thought i had the big news of the day by putting my house on the market,remember you can still miscarry up to 3 months, just prepare yourself for that' gotta love exdoctors.i know who linda is.i can't picture her face, but you're not wrong.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderHey i'm here if you want to call or write, i may pass out however, so if i don't respond that's why. Iunderstand if you choose not to do either.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoOk. About to watch a movie with Caitlin, so I'm not being distant or anything.Mar 6

Jilian Oderi appreciate that, she's up for the weekend?Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Odernevermind. enjoy yourself as i said i'll be here.Mar 6 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoWe should go out for dinner.Mar 19

Jilian OderOk. When ?Mar 19 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoTonight would work for me.Mar 19

Jilian OderI can do that .Mar 19 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino



























William ConstantinoAny preferences?Mar 19

Jilian OderWell feeling light financially so nothing crazy. Cambridge ? Seems in betweenish.Mar 19 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderOr Allston whatever is fineMar 19 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoHarvard Square 8ish work for you?Mar 19

Jilian OderI can do that .Mar 19 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoOk. I'll iron out the details with you a little later, but that'll work for a start.Mar 19

Jilian OderAlright sounds good gives me a time frameMar 19 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI'm hopping in the shower , where would you like to meet specifically.Mar 19 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI was just working that out. I'll let you know by the time you'd be getting out.Mar 19

Jilian OderOk sounds goodMar 19 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderThere's a bus in 20 and one in 40, which one should I take ?Mar 19 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoTake the one in 40.Mar 19

Jilian OderGood by meMar 19 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino































William ConstantinoI looked at a few options as far as price/cuisine. Since I'll eat anything and you might have morerestrictions, is there anyplace in particular you'd want?Mar 19

Jilian OderWell what options did you come up with ?Mar 19 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWell, Alden & Harlow is great, but certainly not cheap. There's this place called The Boathousethat's real cheap, but it's veggie burger/Caesar salad town for nonmeat eaters.Mar 19

Jilian OderWell I'm eating meatAlden and Harlow does look goodMar 19 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoMeat certainly opens the options.Mar 19

Jilian OderOoh yeah fancy pricesMar 19 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI'm considering The Boathouse, or its slightly more upscale sister restaurant Daedalus.Mar 19

Jilian OderThat's fineWherever you like I'll be eating lightly I thinkMar 19 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderOr you knowLet's go fancyAlden and Harlow fuck it I'm likely up for one or two small plates they might as well be niceI'll work it outMar 19 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI'm actually feeling the other direction. I've eaten Alden & Harlow. They're small plates. I kind ofwant a sandwich.Mar 19

Jilian OderBoathouse it is I may get that salad after allThat's ok by meMar 19 ∙ Sent from Messenger

























Jilian OderHopping on bus nowI'll just meet you at the restaurant ?Mar 19 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYeah, you're certainly going to beat me there. Look at the Boathouse and Daedalus when you getthere and pick one. They're almost right next to each other. Whatever one seems more conduciveto sitting down, eating, and maybe actually hearing each other.Mar 19

Jilian OderWill doMar 19 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderAt Daedalus looked quieterWhat's your eta ?Mar 19 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino510, traffic dependingMar 19

William ConstantinoLikely on the shorter side of thatMar 19

Jilian OderOk first booth when you walk in on the leftIf I'm not there I'm in the bathroomMar 19 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI never can sleep anymoreMar 21

Jilian OderI'm sorry that I missed your message . Busy mind in the night keeping you up I assumeMar 21 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoHow're you doing?Mar 21

William ConstantinoWell, I hope you're sleeping well. We'll talk soon.Mar 22

Jilian OderHey just woke up. Sorry we keep missing one another



























Mar 22 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoHelloJust looking to chat...Mar 23

Jilian OderStill up ?Mar 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYep.Mar 24

Jilian OderI've gotta few before I crashHow are you ?Mar 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoGetting there. Yourself?Mar 24

Jilian Oderdoing alirght,i wish it was springMar 24 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoDittoMar 24

Jilian OderHealth and brain are doing okay i thinkMar 24 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoHow was work today?Mar 24

Jilian OderIt was airght. It's weird without Kyle, and we were over staffed and understaffed at the wrongpoints.Mar 24 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderso a little stressful.Mar 24 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYou at home?



























Mar 24

Jilian OderI am, getting tucked in. You?Mar 24 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoNearbyMar 24

Jilian OderI'd be up for a visit, but i have to work in 9 hours.Mar 24 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoOkMar 24

Jilian OderWhat are you doing out and about?Mar 24 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderI'm finding my eyes slamming shuti'm sorry i'm not more chattyMar 24 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoFreezing, for the most part Mar 24

Jilian Odergoodnesswhere did you go out to?Mar 24 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoHold on...Just a fewMar 24

Jilian OderokMar 24 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI won't keep you up longMar 24

Jilian Oderi'm up for chatting online for a few.Mar 24 ∙ Sent from Web

William Constantino





























William ConstantinoWell...I've had an awful lot to think about latelyMar 24

Jilian OderI can imagineanything you'd like to share?Mar 24 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoOf course...But I've never been that great on chatMar 24

Jilian Oderjust trying to open up the conversationMar 24 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI knowYou work at 10am tomorrow?Mar 24

Jilian Oderi do,tuesday is the worstMar 24 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThink you can spare me about 20 minutes?Mar 24

Jilian Oderi'm really falling asleep here.i'm sorryMar 24 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderi can probably talk on the phone tomorrow on my way in, around 9:30i've just got to take care of myself.Mar 24 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI'm at your house now thoughMar 24

Jilian Oderalright, well, i'm going to sleep, so please go home.i'm sorry but i need more notice than that.i'm really already up too late, so i'm going to pass out.Mar 24 ∙ Sent from Web

William Constantino



























Ok. I'm sorry. Not trying to be crazy, y'know?Mar 24

William ConstantinoI mean, if you opened your door you'd see me5 minutes and I'll Uber my ass out of here?I'm right hereThis has been so hard on meAnd I'm here. And I'm not looking to fuck with your shit.Mar 24

Jilian OderHey . Just wanted to touch base about last night. I don't mind seeing you at all and it wasn't a badvisit, weird but aren't they all? I just want to reassess boundaries about popping by. I really can'thave you just come by , mostly as it's not my house and also because I need to be able to haveagain my boundaries , we can talk more about this as you want , just needed to get that out asap.I'm not mad, I just need to plan meetings like that and I want us to respect eachothers saMar 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderSpaceMar 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYeah...wasn't looking to make that a habit.I'll certainly give you your spaceYou made it clear about that last night, and I'm not entertaining the idea of dropping by your mom'swhenever I wantBut the last conversation I remember you having about boundaries was with Molly, so forgive me ifthis rubbed me the wrong way as a follow up to last nightMar 24

Jilian OderI knowBut physical space is something we controlLast night was weird I knowMar 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI just wanted to be really clearWork and home are a no go unless we chat or plan it, maybe I'm in no position to make requestsBut I'll see you and talk to you whenever I canI want to respect whatever things we can when we can . Civility right even if it's not friendship ?Thanks for listeningMar 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoGive me a bit too respond. I'm out picking Molly up from the dentist.Mar 24

Jilian Oder




















That's coolMar 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoLook...there's nothing that I disagree with, in principal, that you asked for there. I knew I wasprobably pushing it by just showing up...But honestly thought you'd probably dig big romanticgestures. I at least left the boombox at home What wound up happening wasn't in my plan, butshowing you kindness and tenderness was. This being the first contact you made to me afterwardsreally kind of stung for a moment.Mar 24

Jilian OderI'm sorry to say itI mean to do thatIt was tenderAnd really niceI don't want to hurt your feelings now I should of spoken with you more about how o was nice tofeel cared for by youThen talked about needs etcMar 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI can be brusque and shitty and awkwardI'm sorryI'm at work til 6 if i don't respond quickly fyiAnd very very tiredMar 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

You called Jilian Oder.

Jilian Oder?Mar 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWhoops. My bad. Was just opening messenger. Mar 24

Jilian OderThat's okMar 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoUgh... http://www.universalhub.com/2015/policeinvestigaterestroomcamerabrooklinedeli?nocache=1Mar 24

Jilian OderOh no !Mar 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino






http://lm.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.universalhub.com%2F2015%2Fpolice-investigate-restroom-camera-brookline-deli%3Fnocache%3D1&h=WAQGzaki7&s=1


















Yeah. Not cool.Mar 24

William ConstantinoThursday?Mar 24

Jilian OderSure lets plan tomorrow I'm gonna pass outMar 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoSame here. I never slept.Mar 24

Jilian OderGoodnight lets both try to catch some zzzsMar 24 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoGoodnightMar 24

Jilian OderHey there , what's up for tomorrow?Mar 25 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWorking that out. Figure you'll head home for a bit first. What time you out?Mar 25

Jilian Oder2yeah home can be good first, or i can do an afternoon hang if that's easier, let me know what youdecideMar 25 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderSo I should be good to go around 4 or so, or whenever in between I think I'm likely going to be apumpkin at midnight or around there I haven't been able to catch up on sleep this week. Let meknow when and what you would like to doMar 26 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI'm getting ready to get going...Mar 26

Jilian OderOk I'm actually clothes shopping on newbury if you wanna meet upMar 26 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino




























Oh, ok. Didn't know you'd be there. Give me about another half hour and I'll be out the door.Mar 26

Jilian OderThat's cool I'm taking my timeMar 26 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderSnacking at the top floor of tridentWhere you hiding ?Mar 26 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoHeading that way now.Mar 26

Jilian OderOkMar 26 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoTraffic is being uncooperativeMar 26

Jilian OderThat's coolI'm still here snackingFair warning I'm post work and not prettied upHow's the ride ?Mar 26 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoSlow, but advancing.Mar 26

Jilian OderUsing the bathroom if I'm not at my seatMar 26 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderHeyMar 28 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoHey. I'm out at Dim Sum. How're you?Mar 28

Jilian OderHormonally unwellFeeling pretty trashed and sad and madAt the world not youMar 28 ∙ Sent from Messenger


























William ConstantinoSorry to hear that Mar 28

Jilian OderI'm sorry you probably have no invest i hearing about thisMar 28 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoNo, it's fineMar 28

Jilian OderWhat are you doing later ?Mar 28 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoDon't know yet. Hanging with Caitlin right now. I'll let you know?Mar 28

Jilian OderSureHave a nice brunchI'm going to try to regain my sanityMar 28 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoAny impetus for this?The feelings, I mean. Aside from just being hormonal...Mar 28

Jilian OderThere is no real reasonIt's feeling really lonelyBut it started with the hormonesMar 28 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoFeeling any better?Mar 28

Jilian OderI ate a really excellent omletMar 28 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderbut i'm still grumpy and strangeneeded to get things done today, but it's not going to happenhow's your day going?Mar 28 ∙ Sent from Web

William Constantino



























William ConstantinoIt's alrightMar 28

Jilian Oderstaying in for the night i imagine?Mar 28 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoNot sure yet...Mar 28

Jilian OderI'm hanging out here and eating ricotta cheese from the container.Mar 28 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderYou are more than welcome to visit.I know, i'm inticingMar 28 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderi should of said eggcellent omeletMar 28 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoNo, you shouldn't have Mar 28

Jilian OderIt was the right call.i need to use more puns i thinkMar 28 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoHeyMar 28

William ConstantinoAlright. I'm guessing you might've fallen asleep. How you rest well.Hope you rest well, ratherI'll be up if you want to chatMar 28

Jilian OderAwake ?Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYepMar 29

Jilian Oder





























Jilian OderOh heyPassed out a bit thereMar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderHow are you ?Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI'm alrightWas going to see if you wanted to hangout earlier, but you'd been idle for a while by that point.C'est la vie.Mar 29

Jilian Oder...sorry about that. I would of. i guess i was sleeping though.apparently i wouldn;t of been great companyMar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThat's alright. I've got to get up in the morning and go to an Easter brunch...even though it's onlyPalm Sunday Mar 29

Jilian Oderi'd hang out now, but apparently it's super late.Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderweird, family or friends?Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoFamMar 29

Jilian OderI hope that goes as painlessly as possible.I have easter next weekend with my brother and nephews etc.Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoWhere're you going for that?Mar 29

Jilian Odermy brother's in wakefield, it's just traditional fun for the kids, they are super non religious.They get a honey baked ham, and ther's hanging out and my brother get's to show of his fancyitalian imported foods or whatever he's into right now.Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oder



























Jilian Oderusually it would be 2 glasses of wine and i pass out on a couch but it will be seltzer and juice andplaying legos with nephews hopefully.Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoHey, can't beat LegosMar 29

Jilian OderLast timei was there my nephew was reading mad magazine and arguing with my brother ...whowas saying it was too 'subversive' and telling him it wasn't.(12)Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoIt is subversive. That's the point Mar 29

Jilian Oderhaha, i know.my brother certainly wasn't tearing it out of his handsMar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoHaven't seen an issue in years. I think they have advertisements in it now. That used to beverboten when Bill Gaines was still the editor.Mar 29

Jilian OderI think they do too.both my brother and I were into it for awhile there.Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI wrote a college paper on Information Discrimination and MAD Magazine.Mar 29

Jilian Oderinteresting!how it discriminates, or how people discrimate against readership?Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoNo, on the nature of being able to discern whether information is from a credible source or not.Mar 29

Jilian Oderoh, you know what. i didn't see the word information up there. i misread.Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoAh, ok



























There was a running theme in MAD: Politicians, celebrities, candy and soda companies...they onlywant your money, and they're willing to lie, flatter, or attack your ego in order to get it.Christ, I learned about the IranContra affair when I was 8 from reading that marvelous rag Mar 29

Jilian Oderit's pretty great. my family is a bunch of punks weather they dress there kids in khakis or not.omg, watching this documentary about pregnancy and it's making me sleepy, i think that's whathappened before.british lady and lots of sound affects having to do with water and womb soundsMar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThat'd do itMar 29

Jilian OderIt's helping me calm down hormonallyit's hard feeling this agitated, but that's okay, it will pass for at least a few months. then get weirdagain apparentlylet me know if you want to hear about none of thisMar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI would if I didn'tMar 29

Jilian Oderok, thanks.It came to my attention when I dated brett, that there are just some people in this world who aren'tthe people you go to about certain things. Turns out he was just an asshole, but I learned thelesson that you may have different friends for different needs.Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderiam totally late night rantingI am no fun to be around in this state.my mom was like 'i'm going to stop trying to cheer you upnow, it's not working'what you end up doing with the rest of your day?Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoReally just hung with Caitlin. She's got work to catch up on so she went home around quarter of 11.We've got a computer science/polisci project we're going to work on this summer when she's donewith classes, so that's cool.Mar 29

Jilian Odernice, just for nerding?Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web




















William ConstantinoYeah, unless it winds up being really good. She wants to work on data visualization techniques,and I've got a hair across my ass regarding congressional apportionment, so it's a good match Mar 29

Jilian Odersounds good.Totally not my ball of wax or whatever the kids say, but it'll be fun for you.I'm going to get as much outdoor time as possible, and try to help the dude who gardens at mymoms garden some veggies.he's not hired, just a sweet jewish boy from down the street.i meant, this summer,i will do these things. lots of ocean, lots of garden, maybe finally work on the blog.Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoGood dealMar 29

Jilian Oderwheres 'easter' tomorrow?Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoMolly's folksMar 29

Jilian Oderoh that will be nice thenMar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoMeh. Beats my relatives.Mar 29

Jilian Odernot to say your family wouldn't...just i know you hae had complicationslatelyMar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderwhat you up to, movie watching?Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoNaw. Just surfing.Mar 29

Jilian OderI'm having a hard time getting physically comfortableMar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino



























William ConstantinoLaying in bed with the laptop?Mar 29

Jilian OderYeahMar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWhat's your work schedule like this week?Mar 29

Jilian OderNormalMar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI'm free weds and Thursday afternoon this week so farThursday I have the second midwife apptMonday Tuesday and Friday I have plansMar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoOk. I would actually like to see you.Mar 29

Jilian OderOk let's make it happenI'd like to see youWeds is really goodMar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderAfternoon after workI'll need to be in bed earlyI like this 'actually like to'Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWell, this whole thing has been tough on me on several different levels.Mar 29

Jilian OderI know this...Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino

Mar 29

Jilian OderIt's not the easiest for me either




























Jilian OderI'm just trying to stay calm as I canHere's a photo of me making a crazy face ?Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian Oder


Jilian OderI uhGot boredMar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThat's calm? Mar 29

Jilian OderSureMar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderOk I'm no longer wearing uncomfortable clothes and turned the lights outLet's see if this helps me relaxAt least I know the difference between hormones and regular crazy...or do I ?Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoIf it's regular crazy, you'd be the last to knowMar 29














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Jilian OderHaMar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYeah, I haven't exactly mastered the art of the "selfie"Mar 29

Jilian OderYou always look mad in photos !Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI always feel like I'm probably looking doofy if I smileMar 29

Jilian OderYou have a great smileMar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino

Mar 29

William Constantino







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Mar 29

Jilian OderIt was worth a tryMar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino



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Mar 29

Jilian Oder


William ConstantinoSee...I think that first one works bestMar 29

Jilian OderLast one is a keeperGonna try to sleepMar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoA'ight. G'night.Mar 29

Jilian OderNightWeds?Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI'd like that. I certainly try.








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I'll certainly tryMar 29

Jilian OderOk coolGnightMar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoAny better today?Mar 29

Jilian OderYes muchMar 29 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoSounds goodMar 29

Jilian Oderkilean actually came down and visted, i'm less irriitated at him than i thought, he's being a greatfriend.Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoSo he only says douchey things? Mar 29

Jilian OderI think he was reacting, he's supportive of my decision, etc, etc, I think maybe he was just a bit too'honest' when i needed support before.Brenden and erin remain on my shit list.Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoWhat'd you guys do?Mar 29

Jilian Oderoh me and kilean?went to sunset cantina, i had a virgin pina colada, and pub food, and hung out at the house a bit.Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderit was nice.how was 'easter'?Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoGood people. Molly's folks, a foul mouthed female public school teacher and 3 gay guys. Prettygood.

























Mar 29

Jilian Oderthat sounds greatMar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoEverything else had been shit, so it was a nice change of pace Mar 29

Jilian Odereverything else?you mean today?Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI mean everything else in my life.Mar 29

Jilian Oderi see, i didn't know if the beginning of your day had been shit.I'm exhausted and have to work tomorrow, i'm glad you had some fun today.Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoAlright. Don't be a stranger.Mar 29

Jilian Oderdon't plan on it, still aiming for weds, i got plans the next few nights, if i'm out of touch.let me know if weds afternoon looks good for youMar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoOk. What chu up to anyway?Mar 29

Jilian Odergetting things done, hanging out with people.I mean, do you really want to hear about my personal life?I'I'm willing to talk about it, but I didn't know if it was weird'Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoDo I still fit into it?Mar 29

Jilian OderI'm pretty sure that you and are bound for life, and even if that wasn't so, You are totally my friend.I hope one of my closest, if we can manage it.Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

























William ConstantinoI hadn't signed up for friendship. You told me you don't bang your friend, and I sure as hell don'timpregnate mineMar 29

Jilian OderI know that's not what we signed up for, but it's where we are now.Mar 29 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoFriends?Mar 29

Jilian OderI'd hoped so.I've certainly thought we'd 'broken upI'm not trying to upset you but I am unsure of what world molly would be ok with you and i beinganything else, and you said yourself that we have lost the possibility for romanceThis is not the conversation i meant to get into tonight.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoLook at the spot you've put me inMar 30

Jilian OderIt's a shitty situationbut i'd hoped a friendship was recoverable from it.or that we could get there slowlyMar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYou're dealing with a passionate man. Sorry to inform you. Mar 30

Jilian OderI'm very aware.This child is a thunderstorm waiting to happen between the way both of us are.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI'd hate to think after all those things sweet things you had told me that you'd be able to distanceyourself from that and carry my child at the same time.Mar 30

Jilian OderI've felt many things for you, but do i feel romantic towards you lately? It's complicated and difficult.I was really hurt by your reactions and the things you said to me, even in shock, can not be unsaidor unheard.I do love you dearly, but that doesn't mean i have to be or stay romantic with you.There's no room for me like that in the life you want to live.























I've no interest in having a romantic thing under molly's nose.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYou're cruelMar 30

Jilian OderI'm sorry you feel that way.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderI don't think i'm being cruel.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoMaybe I was stupid to hope or to tryMar 30

Jilian OderWe've had feelings for one another, but where would they fit?Tell me how you think it would of worked? I'd honestly like to know, you were the one who told me itcouldn't.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThey have to. There's no other way.Mar 30

Jilian OderI can't ever have the things I want with you, love. I wanted them, but the fact is you already aregrowing a home and a marriage outside of me.This doesn't mean i stop loving youMar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderIt just means we have to shift to a different kind of partnership/friendshipMar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoGrowing? Do you have any idea what my future looks like now?Mar 30

Jilian OderI know that you aren't going to have things the way you wanted.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoListenMar 30

Jilian Oder



























I'm sorry things worked out that way, it's fucking terrible.OI'm listening.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoWhat do you want with me that you can't have?That you think you can't have?Mar 30

Jilian OderI want someone who isn't in a long term relationship with someone else.I want to be number 1. Iwant to be someones priority and love and life. I dont know if that is going to be monogamous ornot. I want to have a home with someone. I want to have animals and a garden and place for thiskid to run about in green space.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderAnd you'll always be a part of my life.But you've got molly to build home and heart and everything else with, even if it doesn't look theway you imagined, because i ruined everythingAnd i'm sorry. I never meant to smash up your dreamsMaybe i'm the asshole for following my heart.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI'm trying to have a discussion with you about the futureMar 30

Jilian OderRight, and your future belongs to you and someone else.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoDoes it now?Mar 30

Jilian OderAs far as I know you and Molly are still planning a future together.That's going with the information I have.You told me that you love me, but she's the one you want to be buried withthat was relativly clearMar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderI want be be with someone who wantst be buried with me.And it wasn't clear before, but it's seems crystal now.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI need to think seriously about what my life is going to look like. And this kid's. If you want to discuss






















what the future might hold, let me know.Mar 30

Jilian OderOk, i'm discussing it.This kid will have you in it's life, if you want.I don't know what to say other than that. I care for you, i always have, but i'm doing this all on myown so far, and that's clear, and if I was in a romantic relationship with you, that would not be thecase.I want someone at every doctors appointment, every time i cry, rubbing my back when it hurts.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderYou dont have the space for me.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoAnd it's been killing me to not be there for you like thatMar 30

Jilian OderBut you aren't.You aren't there.And i'm not going to hold out on thati'm going to take are of myself.because that's all i can do.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderNo one else will.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThink about your plans this week and where I might fit inMar 30

Jilian OderIt's okay that Molly is more important to you, what i want is asking too muchyou never asked for thisI told you I have weds afternoon free.other than that i have doctors appts, time with people, time to get things done.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThat must be all you want from me thenMar 30

Jilian Oderwell if you'd be willing to go to the doctors office and fill out a medical history and maybe hear yourchild's heart beat, that would be really cool.my mom will also be there.






















William ConstantinoWhen's that?Mar 30

Jilian Oderbut i didnt think you were up for that.Thursday at 6:40 at Cambridge Birth Center.There may not be a heart beat or ultrasound thing, but i heard that sometimes happens at a 10week appt.It's only supposed to last 20 minutes, the appt.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoOk. Consider how much of me you really want.Mar 30

Jilian OderHere's my wish and i dont know if you can do this? you let me know what you can actually do.I want to be friends. I want to be parents together. I don't see a romantic future for us right now, it'snear impossible considering our situation. I want you to come to appointments if you want to. I wantyou to be interested in loving and the welfare of this child.If you feel like it's too much, it's too much.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoToo littleSo, sorryMar 30

Jilian Odertell me what your ideal looks likeMar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderout of curiositySo also, what you're saying to me is that if doesn't look exactly like you want it, it can't be anything?We can't come to an agreement?Then i remain under the assumption that i'm alone here.As i'm sure you remain under yours about me.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoUnder mine about you?Mar 30

Jilian OderYes, that i can't adapt to what you want, that i'm not fulfilling your needsMar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oder























I dont know what you want me to say.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI just want to love you. And it seems like you're telling me that ship has sailedMar 30

Jilian OderI'm sure you feel the same about me but here goes:You left me and screamed at me when I needed you most.You let me know in no uncertain terms i was not your priorityYou haven't even apologized for the terrible shit you said to me.I imagine you don;t feel apologetic.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThen you are, in fact, imagining thingsMar 30

Jilian OderI can rebuild trust with you as a friend, but it's really hard to believe you want anything romanticfrom me.II'm certainly sure that molly would never have any interest in you being romantic with mneand that you have no interest in a life without mollyandeven if you did, wouldn't you hate me for the rest of your life from taking her away from you?Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderthe love of your life.I'll never be that to youwe can always love eachotherthat doesn't mean we can be togetherI will never be second again, i can't. I just can't.It was a fucking pipe dream to begin with, but someone is always going to end up hurt.I'm sorry if i sound bitterMar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderi feel bitterMar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYou never exactly offered me #1 either. Best I could hope for was #1a or #1b, depending on thedayMar 30

Jilian Oderneither of us had that to offer from the get go.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web




















William ConstantinoWe're pretty fucking far from the "getgo" nowMar 30

Jilian OderYes, i know.I'm remaining civil and calm in this situation because it's what i've chosen to do, i have a lot ofemotions on how i was treated here, but i discount them i think, because i was never 'yours' andyou were never 'mine'I shouldn't of had sex with someone coupled if i though that i would want full support in this sort ofsituation.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderbut i didn't think i'd be in this situation.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThat's not how I think we were both feelingMar 30

Jilian Oderwe felt that way sometimes, but your home and heart were mostly someone elses.a few weeks ago you downgraded it to 'hooking up for 6 weeks'i don;t know what you are driving at now, by asking what i want, because that's irrelevantwhat are you even offering?to love me yes, but not to give me home and your whole heart, and all the things i want in aromantic connectionMar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderthis kid is not a reason to nuke your whole connection with molly if that' s even what you're thinkingi wouldn't and won't ask for that ever.I don't think me not wanting a romantic connection where i'm not getting what i need is grounds fornot loving this child.i'm sorry if that's what you need to care for this child.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThat;s not what I saidMar 30

Jilian OderThen tell me what you meanMar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoLook, you just want to move on from me then fine.Mar 30

William Constantino























I'm sooryMar 30

Jilian OderWhat could you even give me? fuck, now i'm fucking crying.you don't have any space in your heart or life for me.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYou're killing meMar 30

Jilian OderAnd you are killing me. Care for me, love me by loving this kid. Living your life the best you can andtaking care of yourself.it doesn't have to be some twisted around romance where the rest of your life is fucking killed.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI'm worried that if I open up to you you'll just break my fucking heartMar 30

Jilian OderHaven't we already broken eachtothers hearts?Mine was broken the night i made up my mind and you told me you despised me.yours was broken when i couldn't give you want you wanted.I followed my heart, and i got venom, you asked me to listen to yours and all you got was my shittyselfishnesswe totally suckMar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoSorry I didn't have my shit together enough to make this storybook.That's not snarky 'sorry'Mar 30

Jilian OderI know.and i'm sorry that the words you used on me and the yelling aren;'t a thing i can do anymore, noteven for a minute without closing downthat's not your fault, that's 4 years of being called a shithead from someone else.it think the kids call it baggage.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI think I kept my shit together pretty well for someone who was realizing their whole life wasspiraling out of their controlI'm sorry I didn't keep it together betterAnd I'm sorry I gave you venom.Mar 30

Jilian Oder






















I appreciate the apology....and I accept it.It's hard not to say though that when all the dominos fall that people don't show you how they trulyfeel.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI felt I needed to show you thatMar 30

Jilian Oderwe can't always get what we want thoughAnd the partner i want to have would say to me 'we'll figure it out somehowMar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoJil...Mar 30

Jilian Oderright from the get go.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderI'm not an asshole for following my heartMar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoContext is _everything_Mar 30

Jilian Oderi'm not an asshole for choosing not to have an abortionMar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoCan you see that?What you seem to forget...I still had to tell Molly when we had that conversation. I had been in state of fear and pain and panicWhat human can really be expected to say "we'll figure it out somehow" under thosecircumstances?Mar 30

Jilian OderI get that, I guess what i wish you would have chosen to do is walked away and called me a cuntwho you despised to a wall somewhere. i don't deserve that.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoAnd you know what? I'm a great guy. I'm warm and loving and selfless. I think you got to see someof that. And I don't think I deserve to be judged in the worst moment of my life when I'm being toldthat what I think or feel has no bearing on the situation. Maybe I'd ideally have loved someone whowould've at least said that they were taking that into account. Instead you had gone from saying
























you weren't asking anything from me to saying you'd expect child support.Mar 30

William ConstantinoNeedless to say my head was spinningI was backed into a corner. I said horrible things to you. I also begged and pleaded.Mar 30

Jilian OderI needed you thenAnd I know you couldn'tMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI triedMar 30

Jilian OderYou couldn'tMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYou know I triedI came over and held youMar 30

Jilian OderI didn't see it ;/Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoAnd we were both frightenedMar 30

Jilian OderI'm still angry in some ways too I guessAt myselfMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWhat are you angry at yourself about?Mar 30

Jilian OderFor putting myself in this situationTrusting my body to someone who couldn't provide love and support regardless of what happensYou said it yourselfYou could of been there for meBut here you can'tMostly it seems because of your life and connection with mollyMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian Oder

























Jilian OderAnd I don't hate you for thatMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoAnd I trusted you with mineMar 30

Jilian OderI never implicitly said I would ever have an abortion but I never knew if I would or not. But younever said to me that you'd be supportive for a child we didn't talk about itthree people who have unprotected sex talk about itthat's whynot three peoplestupid voice to textMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoSee...now I'm thinkingMar 30

Jilian Oderwhat are you thinkingMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoEven before this...would you ever really have wanted to been tied down with me? If you were evermy "#1", would that have ever worked both ways?Mar 30

Jilian OderI don't know it was never even an available thoughtPerhaps we worked because I couldn't beMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoFair to say you certainly alluded to thinking along those linesMar 30

Jilian OderWell to be clear that was you being my number oneMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI could never be yoursYou have that alreadyMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoOr #1b, depending on the dayMar 30

Jilian Oder



























Jilian OderRightAnd it was a thought because you were treating me bestI was likely unfair to BrendenLikely why he left without a traceMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderThis pregnancy being the final insultMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoAnd I treated you great...right up until the moment you were telling me you were altering my lifeand future forever and tearing my heart out.Mar 30

Jilian OderRightThe moment we needed eachother mostWe failedTotallyMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI mean...and I'm serious here...do you want a doormat? Someone who'll love you and approve ofyou no matter what, and in the exact moment you want it?Mar 30

Jilian OderOnly in the times when shit gets realAnd they don't have to be at my side it just has to be a conversationI don't ever want to be yelled at again by a lover.I won'tif someone can't used either walk away or how thoughtful conversation I don't want to do ithave not howI'm not anyone's anger sounding boardMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoPeople yell sometimes. Especially when you've got them cornered. If I'm nothing more than a"yeller" to you now...Mar 30

Jilian OderThat's not trueMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThat's what I'm gettingI blew itMar 30

Jilian Oder























Jilian Oderit was blownMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYou've apparently moved onMar 30

Jilian OderI could've never gotten what I wantedMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWhat did you want?Mar 30

Jilian OderI didn't even know what I wanted until I was hereI don't want to be second bestMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoNeither do IMar 30

Jilian OderAnd have not moved on just letting my life progress naturallyYou're not secondbest to the person you're withhow would you feel if she knew you were saying these things to meMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI mean how would she feelMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoEverybody's out for their own interests here, isn't that the case?Mar 30

Jilian OderI guess so I'd rather honestly untangle this best we can my taking romance off the tableNot because I'm over youBut because we have toLet's just focus love for this kidPleaseMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderAnd I may meet someoneMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino



























If you're going to bind me to your life with a child and take that off the table...]That is cruelMar 30

Jilian OderAnd that's my businessIt's notMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYes it isMar 30

Jilian OderIt's what we have to work withMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderThen I'm fucking evil again fine. Villanize me for protecting my heartbut try to put aside your hate for me and care for this kid for a minuteMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoHate for you?!Mar 30

Jilian OderYes I'm cruel remember ?Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoFull quote "If you're going to bind me to your life with a child and take that off the table... That iscruel"Mar 30

William ConstantinoAre you cruel?Mar 30

Jilian OderIf that's what cruel is to you then yes but I think you are being unfairMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI The right to kind of relationship I wantI have a right to protect my heartand I have a right to be treated how I likeMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoSo do IMar 30


























Jilian OderI knowbut you don't have rights to meAnd I have none to youMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian Oderit may feel like I own youbut your heart is your ownMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI'm trying to work this out. If you have no interest in my heart, then I guess that's thatMar 30

Jilian OderThe trying to work it out is that's that?I have interest in your heart just not in a romantic relationship.I don't see how it's possibleyou haven't told me how it would be possible if you haven't shown me I would be possibleMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian Oderand I would never ask of you but life changes that would make it possiblebecause I actually care for your heartit's just not mineMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYou never asked me. I'm asking what you want and what it might look like.Where I;m involvedMar 30

Jilian OderIf you truly love me then please just be my best friendplease just do it's good for this kidMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderAnd let me be free let my heart be freeMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYou've taken much and when I offered more you turned me down.Mar 30

Jilian OderYou've only been for me when you canMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian Oder

























Let me lay this out for youMar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI could say the same about youMar 30

Jilian OderGive your medical history so that this kid can have a healthy start and the right tests before birth ,show up for appointments and be there for me as a friend and coparent. I'm giving you what i haveavailable under the hurt IVE sustained here regardless of how little you think that's worth. Myfriendship is worth 1000 times more than the unhealthy romance that you and I would have.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderPlease, just do this for me, and don't leave me alone.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderand if you cannot then say it. say it and let me do it myself.I've been recovering from our breakup from the moment that you told me you hated me, I didn'tthink i'd be rejecting you.I thought i was already gone from your heart.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYou know how many times over the last few weeks I wanted to just send you one of these: ?Mar 30

Jilian OderThen what preventted youWhat stopped you from loving me the way you want to.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderIt's okay that your love for your life and molly and everything else is greater than it is for me.It's okay. i forgive you.But it's not what i want. I'm begging you now. Be my friend.please.I have to go to sleep i can't be staying up like this, it fucks me up the whole week.Please think about what i'm asking.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoAnd what if I told you what my feeling for you actually were?Mar 30

Jilian OderYou can tell me, but i know where I stand and what I can do.I'm asking for what i can do.






















you asked what i want of you, i told you.I need a father for this child, i need a best friend, i need you happy and healthybecause i love you.why would the rest matterMar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThen if I loved you more than my life and Molly and everything, then you'd want to just be friends.Mar 30

Jilian OderDon't throw that at me. I know it's not true.it's never been true.it will never be true.And yes, i'd want to be your friend, because that's what i need now.why would you ask anything else out of me? we owe eachother nothing.Please let me sleep.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoSleep then. Think of me.Mar 30

William ConstantinoIt's only fair. I've missed you.G'nightMar 30

Jilian OderI never don't think of youI'm a wreck todayWe should talk more.Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWe shouldMar 30

William ConstantinoThe last time I felt alright was when we were sitting in the Eliot Hotel and talking. And when I got tohold you in my arms for a moment before we parted.Mar 30

William ConstantinoEveryday since has been tormentMar 30

Jilian OderWhy do you think that is?Mar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino























You're carrying my child and I haven't been able to be close to you.Mar 30

Jilian OderI'm sorry our talks last night got so intenseIt was late. And a lotMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI know. Thought I might try you earlier tonight Mar 30

Jilian OderIm hereMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderThough watching the walking dead finaleMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoNo spoilers please, but they kill any major characters?Mar 30

Jilian OderI haven't started it yetBut I will let you know that factThat if if the potatoes I just ate don't send me into a comaMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoFair enough. I would've written to you earlier in the day, but I've been alternating between beingunable to sleep and sleeping for 18 hours Mar 30

Jilian OderI'm glad you got restMar 30 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderNo major characters deadMar 31 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderWant to see a matinee of It Follows tomorrow ?There's a 4:30Mar 31 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI might be interested. I thought of hitting you up about that a few days ago, but it was after the lastshowtime.Mar 31


























Jilian OderI hear youWhen will you know About tomorrow ?I'm free from 3 on, I should be home by 8Mar 31 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThat's the plan, isn't it?Mar 31

Jilian OderOk cool you sort of seemed passive about the movieWas wondering if you didn't know if you could hangMar 31 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian Oderwell let me know where you'd like to meet, coolidge could be good for a snack and maybe movieMar 31 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYou got it.What's up with you?Mar 31

Jilian OderGoing to bedMar 31 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderWork at 6Mar 31 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoA'ight. Goodnight then.Mar 31

Jilian OderGoodnightMar 31 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderHey , what's the plan ?Apr 1 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYou out yet?Apr 1

Jilian OderI am headed home to changeApr 1 ∙ Sent from Messenger



























Jilian OderWhat's up with you ?Apr 1 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoGetting my ass in gear. I feel like eating at Zaftigs.Apr 1

Jilian Oderthat sounds good, we may miss a movie, but i don't mindi can't really catch the 7PMi'm just resting until I hear a time estimate from you, i feel worn out.Apr 1 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderwhat's your ETA?Apr 1 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoAbout an hour. Hopefully a little less.Apr 1

Jilian OderAt coolidge or here ?Apr 1 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoCoolidge, I assumed. Didn't think you wanted me around your house. I'll text you when I'm near theGreen line.Apr 1

Jilian OderAll I said was not randomly that we need to make plansYeah when thy head on the green line I can head overApr 1 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderYou not thy clearlyApr 1 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWallet went MIA for a bit. You in Coolidge?Apr 1

Jilian OderNope was waiting for you to say you were heading onto the cHome stillApr 1 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoAh. Ok. I'm on Mass Ave. Hopefully be at the train before too long.



























Apr 1

Jilian OderOk I should head over then I guessApr 1 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI might still wait. Rush hour starts early here Apr 1

Jilian OderOk wait until you get a train ?Apr 1 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoIf you want to go now, that should workApr 1

Jilian OderOkJust missed one, should be another soonApr 1 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoSame deal hereApr 1

Jilian OderGetting on one nowYou ?Apr 1 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThe sameApr 1

Jilian OderOh goodWhich stop you at ? I'm about there, heading to zaftigs, must peeApr 1 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoOne awayApr 1

Jilian OderSweet meet you at the train insteadApr 1 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoSleep wellApr 1



























Jilian OderYou have some fun, what you boys going to do?Apr 1 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoPlaying pool at Flat Top Johnny'sApr 1

Jilian Odersounds like a fun time, i wasn't able to find a download of going clear, but i did find the jinx.my russian dressing spilled all over my blinz, speculating if i should eat it or notApr 1 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoNice. The Jinx that is. Not Russian dressing on a blintz.Apr 1

William ConstantinoKickass.toApr 1

Jilian Oderi know it, i think i'll forgo the blinzApr 1 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThat should have Going ClearApr 1

Jilian Oderoh weird, searched it earlier, but there it is now.well sweetApr 1 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYep. I just watched it on my HBOGo account. They had a link up 15 minutes after the broadcaststarted.Apr 1

Jilian Odersweet.lots of sweets apparentlyApr 1 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThat's usually their window for things like Game of Thrones. Unfortunately their servers also tend tocrash for things like the season premier...and the Red Wedding? Took an hour and a half to getthat episode to start Apr 1

Jilian Oder



























Jilian Oderthe struggle is realApr 1 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoAnd you know I just wanted to see the look on my nonbook reading friends faces. Only reason Ikept people like that around. Worth it Apr 1

Jilian OderhahaApr 1 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderit was amazingok goodnight for real. it was nice having some time todayApr 1 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoG'night. Hopefully soon again.Apr 1

Jilian Oderagreed, looks like i might be free saturday night, but that's up in the air, we'll stay in touchApr 1 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderHope time with dad was okApr 2 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoIt was. How'd the appointment go?Apr 2

Jilian OderAttempt to find the heartbeat didn't work (she said it's likely too soon, and no need to worry) i'mimmune to chicken pox, rubella, measles, i don;t have hep b or hep c, and i've never hadtoxoplasmosis. I'm not anemic. My platlets are good,and turns out that my blood type isn't what ithought it was my whole life (i'm o positive, not a positive)Apr 2 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderturns out when i have my early risk assesment on the 15th, that I get to have an ultrasound then iam allowed 'to tell the world;(because miscarriage rates drop out)Apr 2 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYou know? I have no idea what my blood type isWould've wrote to you early, but I crashed as soon as I got homeApr 2

























Jilian OderApparently I didn't know eitherApr 2 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWhen's your next appointment?Apr 3

Jilian OderI have one an early risk assessment with my first ultrasound on 3/15 in brookline villageApr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI'll be on my own if you'd like to comeApr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoLoL...I've been to that clinic beforeThink I told you that sorryStory, ratherApr 3

Jilian OderThe Beth isreal genetic center ?Or whatever it's called ?Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoMight not be the same place, IDK.Apr 3

Jilian OderMaybe notWhy do you ask ?I'd of course love to have you there it's not my regular midwife but it is an important visitApr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoBeen on the phone with my dad. When's the next midwife appointment?Apr 3

Jilian OderI think 4/30 I'll have to look into itLikely evening timeMy mom will be at that oneApr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderOn a date with myselfApr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian Oder



























Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWhere at?Apr 3

Jilian OderHighland kitchen SomervilleApr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI've been there. It's good.Just hanging with yourself tonight?Apr 3

Jilian OderYep, seeing my a friend later but for now Jil on JilApr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoAh. Alright then.Apr 3

Jilian OderYou looking for company ?I've had a rough weekSo I need self lovesHave you been here ? It's crazy goodApr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYeah, I've been there









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Apr 3

Jilian OderOh JesusApr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThink I got the Reuben Cuban or something like that.Oh Jesus?Apr 3

Jilian OderSo goodOh Jesus this is good foodApr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoAhApr 3

Jilian OderHow are you ?Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoGetting good news from my dad. Looks like my aunt Paula might not get completely screwed here.Apr 3

Jilian OderWith the will ?Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYeah. With evening here. I'm not sure if I've gone into details, but that's just the tip of the iceberg.Everything, not eveningApr 3

Jilian OderNot really noProperty stuff ?Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYeah.Apr 3

William ConstantinoYou know...I make a damn good omeletApr 3

William ConstantinoAnd now my cable and internet are down. Not so good...



























Apr 3

William ConstantinoIt's a nice night. We should be adventuring around, y'know?Apr 3

Jilian OderI like an lskIOmelet I meanI hear you it's lovely I had a nice walk around SomervilleDo you know where we can find lilacs ?Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoSure. The Arnold Arboreteum, for one.Apr 3

Jilian OderI like lilacsApr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoHad a bush in the front yard until this fall. They're not blooming yet...are they?Apr 3

Jilian OderNo not until mid MayI just was thinking of spring thingsI like lilacs and orchards and berry pickingI think I'm bacon and short rib drunkApr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoGood dealApr 3

William ConstantinoNo nighttime river walks with me then?Apr 3

Jilian OderNot tonight unfortunatelyI'd love to another nightIf you would want to again ?Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI'll be a while before it's as nice as tonightApr 3

Jilian OderMaybe not so long

























Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWhy not tonight?Apr 3

Jilian OderBecause I have plansApr 3 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoAnything cool?Apr 3

Jilian OderNot sure yet, a friend i made through muffin has passover near me and asked if i wanna hang, i'mnot sure if we're just going to grab a 'drink' or do something else.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoBe more fun with me Apr 3

Jilian OderI'm surprised you don't have plans with peopleApr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoNopeApr 3

Jilian OderI;m sorry i'm not more available, my weekend got...oddly booked.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThat's...unfortunateSo you're booked tomorrow night too?Apr 3

Jilian OderYeah, Nicole is coming down and staying over, kilean has club stuff all weekend but is coming toboston sunday so she wanted to come up and hang, plus friends of hers are in town, so we'regonna go eat cheese and hang out.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoNo time for me thenApr 3

Jilian OderUnfortunately pretty booked until weds, with work, family stuff, friend stuff. Then weds i have to go



























try to get a new social security card and thursday i have the dentist. thrilling i know.I'd really like if you came with me for this ultrasound on the 15th, i'm actually supremly nervous.(we would likely see eachother before then, too)Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThis is tearing me apartI'd like to put a better face on this, but this hurts.Apr 3

Jilian OderI'm sorry you are hurting, i'm just sort of riding on the expectation that i'm at the very least on myown with this pregnancy, so i'm just trying to take care of myself. it's my priority right now.it's not meant to hurt you.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoAnd I've told you your butNotAnd...That's meant nothing?Apr 3

William ConstantinoI mean, sorry if I wasn't right from the get go. You were throwing a grenade into my life.Apr 3

Jilian OderI'd really like to see some action, here. I've asked you to attend appointments with me, and i'd likeyou to be a part of this pregnancy as well. Us forming a friendship is important too, but it's hard totalk to you about just 'stuff' when i'm finding myself not thinking that this 'stuff' this medical historythings so i can get the correct tests, this being there fore me during the pregnancy, is sort of what ineed from you in my life right now, as well as a friendshipApr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderI do appreciate that you've apologized for you intiial reaction. I forgive you.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoHad plans to see my dad the other day. You knew I wanted to go and I asked when the next oneswere.Apr 3

Jilian OderYou didn't seem like you wanted to go.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYou were incorrect thereApr 3

Jilian Oder























Ok. then i was incorrect.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderi want you there on the 15th. It's important to me.I know it's not the midwife, but it's an important appointment.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThis has been the hardest stretch of my life, y'know?I think I need you as much as you say you need me.Apr 3

Jilian Oderok.I know this has been hard for you, i've had my ups and downs lately too, my emotional well being isnot irrelevant here.Can you make it the 15th?Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYesApr 3

Jilian OderThank you.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoLet me ask: is this a date you're on tonight?Apr 3

Jilian OderNot really.Honest answerwe were 'fixed up' and hung out before , and all there was was a friendbuzz.so i'm hanging with a friend.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoJust want to get an idea what I'm setting myself up for here...I told you. You're carrying my child. It's kind of fucking with my biology...Apr 3

Jilian OderFatherhood, starting with this pregnancy. Friendship with me, hopefully if we continue to get along.I'm sorry to hear that. But i'm not a caged bird either.Though this pregnancy and baby are my priority and i'd never do anything to hurt this kidemotionally or physically.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William Constantino
























Then you ask for much, and offer me distance and heartbreak.Apr 3

Jilian OderI'm asking for what I want. I cannot give you what you want. You say you want to be part of thispregnancy and kid's life, then do it regardless of what I can or cannot offer you romantically.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderI'm sorry you feel it's the other way around.But no one else will ever be this kids father. I promise.That i can promise you, and if anyone acted like it, i'd be disinterested.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoSo you refuse me?Apr 3

Jilian OderYou seem to be refusing me.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoFar from itApr 3

Jilian OderI told you what i need, you've stated what you need, and i can't provide you with a romanticrelationship. this is where i stand. I'm going to have a difficult time providing you with friendship ifyou continue to not be able to be here for me and this child during this pregnancy. I didn't want toget this harsh or straightforward, but i'm not interested in being unclear.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYou seem less convinced when I'm looking right at you Apr 3

Jilian OderThe flesh is weak on occasion. But I know what i want and need.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoSo do IApr 3

Jilian OderSo tell me. be clear: best case scenario what do you want from me?Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI want you to love me the way you did. The way you're capable of. I want this kid to have twoparents who love each other. Not a dad who takes them out every other weekend.


























Apr 3

Jilian OderAnd what about Molly in this scenario?Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoShe gets a life that's closer to the one she wants.Apr 3

Jilian OderListen: I've told you what i have to offer, i'm sorry if i misled you in any other way, but i'm letting youknow loud and clear now, what i can and cannot do.I need to know now can you show up for an appointment, and for being a dad without being in aromantic relationship with me.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoOf course I'm say yesI'llApr 3

Jilian OderOkay, then that's what I wantApr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoBut...Apr 3

Jilian OderBut whatApr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYou have no feelings for me then?The conversations we had before...The things we said to each other. That's just in the past now?Sentiments with the shelf life of yogurt?Apr 3

Jilian OderThose were different times, and no i was not being ingenuine. I'm not interested in the past. I'minterested in a future for this child we can both do. I told you what I can do.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoIt wasn't that long ago you were telling me how the days without me didn't feel quite right. And myheart was still in chaos then.Past is quite frequently prologueApr 3

Jilian Oder

























Not here. we're in a different goddamn dimentionApr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderdimensionApr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI'll say we ateAreApr 3

Jilian OderI've only interest in this child now so if you're interested in doing this in a friends capacity, by allmeans, let's, but that's what there is.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoSo, I'm too late then? I could've had it different, but I took too long? Is that it?Apr 3

Jilian OderIt's not about late or early or anything. its about now. I'm interested in now and moving forward forthis child only.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoTo be fair, you're making a decision that has consequences that'll echo for generations. I didn'tthink three weeks to get my head screwed on straight was much time in the scene of things.Apr 3

William ConstantinoSchemeApr 3

Jilian Oderyou feel like your head is screwed on straight? that you know exactly what you want?That's hard for me to believe.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoAnd I figure that's the root of why you're refusing me nowApr 3

Jilian OderIt's a big part of it.I need you being a father now, not anything else, that's showing me love.That's what i have interest in, and you can't drag anything else out of me, i'm sorry to say.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderI've got my walls too.


























Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI plan on climbing thenThemApr 3

Jilian OderPlease don't, just stand beside me and be my friend on this.If you try to defy my boundaries, it's just going to drive me further awayi need support not someone trying to climb my wallsApr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoAll I've done here is offer you more and moreApr 3

Jilian OderBut you have not said yes to what i can give you.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYou carry my child, refuse me, and withdrawApr 3

Jilian OderOur child or nothing pleasei don't like this ownership language.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI thought you had a big romantic streak our something Apr 3

Jilian OderTurns out baby trumps allApr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYes. You seem to use that as a shield too.Apr 3

Jilian OderOh that's what you've got wrongi'm the shield for the babyand nothing gets through without my fucking approval.Listen, i'm getting angry.I dont want to be.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoWell, you picked the father


























I intend to be there for my child. Even if you can't or won't open your heart to me.Apr 3

Jilian OderOk. .our child or nothing please.i'm not interested in the 'my language';Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoIs nothing even an option?Apr 3

Jilian OderI can't even begin to open a door or even build one.I have no idea.I'm interested in this appoitment on the 15th, then maybe some dinner. If that interests you, pleaselet me know.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderThat's all i can look to right now.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoCan you see what the days look like from my perspective?I'm curious. Have you tried?Apr 3

Jilian OderUnfortunatly, i'm not really priortizing or thinking about your emotional state, no. Mostly becauseyou have no interest in mine.You don't seem interested in what i can provide.You actually rarely ask how i feel.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoIs that so?Apr 3

Jilian OderYes entirely.If you care for our child and my wellbeing as a pregnant person, that should be the first thing onyour mindnot who i'm dating, or that it's not you.Here's a fun recent facti'm terrified of miscarrying. I think about about it all the time, it's fucking scary as shit. i'm 3 weeksaway from getting out of the large danger zone and i'm supposed to just sit here being preganantand ok with thatThe midwife said it might be too early to find a heartbeat the other day, and we didn't which 'wasok' but that gave me fucking nightmares



















I dont want to send our child to a filthy day care.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderi want to not work or work from home because i already can't bear the idea of being awayi dont know if i can afford a nice one, even WITH child support.It's not that I hate you, or that you meant nothing to meit's that my head is filled with THISApr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoSo is mine!Apr 3

Jilian OderSo stop it with this romance shit, man, it's not the priority right now!Focus on the rest, focus on my health and pregnancyApr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderworry about me too much that wayI know you feel like you can't do that without romance, but it shouldn't matter.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI'm in perpetual fucking torment. From the goddamn moment you told me you were pregnant I washorrified that I'll have a child that I can't be there for everyday. That I can't live with.Apr 3

Jilian OderIt's not me you want then, it's to be a dad every day.So visit every day dude. let's figure some shit out.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoAnd you're telling I should give up on thatApr 3

Jilian OderNo.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderi'll see you and this kid will whenever we both can, it wont be like trying to see me now.I'll be off for 3 months starting at the birthYou can come over every day for that.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoIf I didn't want you, why would I have fought so hard to keep you? Why would I have risked somuch?Apr 3























Jilian OderYou told me you regretted it.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoWell, I don't have you now, do I?Apr 3

Jilian OderI'm honestly not interested in talking about that any more. if you have interest in this child outside ofa romantic conneciton with me, then let me know i'm not going to say it again.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoAnd you have my kidApr 3

Jilian OderOUR FUCKING KIDi've asked 3 times nowYou can say 'my kid' when you are not 'unsure how you'll feel that day' about signing yourpaternity.and you said that just a week ago.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI'll have your permission then?Apr 3

Jilian OderActually yes.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoLook...Actually, never mindI guess you get to change your mind depending on how you're feeling, but I have to own everythingI've ever said while watching the life I had burn to the ground.Apr 3

Jilian OderAgain, i'm sorry you feel that waybut how else am i supposed to take what you sayif not face value then whatyou've shown me nothing to the contraryApr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoOh? What was seeing you the other day?That wasn't to the contrary?Sorry I had to see my dad. I'm trying to save my family from complete ruination.























Apr 3

Jilian OderI'm glad you saw your dad. The next appoitment is on the 15th, i'll be leaving from Resivoir ataround 2:30/2:45coming straight from work to do so.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYou're binding yourself to me with this. This runs deep for me. It comes with attendant things. Youasked me if I was afraid of your love before, remember?I told you I wasn't. Are you afraid of mine?Apr 3

Jilian OderI'm not interested in talking about this, shoud i meet you at resivoir or somewhere else?we keep talkingit's not that i don't care.but it's time to start prioritizing.You love me? then let the idea of a reilationship go, and show the fuck up.Yes, i'm being fucking cold.but this is the ONLY thing on my mind.Apr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThis must be hard on youApr 3

Jilian OderIncrediblyApr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoAnd I'm trying to do what's in my heart. What I feel is right for me...And our child.Apr 3

Jilian OderWe'll talk soon , i'm off to my plans tonight.I hope you get some rest tonightApr 3 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoNot likely. I've been worried for weeks I'll never get to hold you in my arms while I sleep again...Andyou're telling me that's likely the case.Apr 3

William ConstantinoOk...couldn't resist. I was 5 minutes into telling John Paul what the hell was going on in my life theother night when he stopped me saying "Wait a minute...It's 10 until midnight! Jesus Christ Bill!Don't fuck with me like that...you really had me going!"

The day after...















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Apr 4

imgur.com ∙The Internet's visual storytelling community. Explore, share, and discuss the best visual stories the I…

William ConstantinoNot funny?Apr 4

Jilian OderHope your saturday is going okApr 4 ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoHope you had a good night and weekendApr 7

Jilian OderThanks I appreciate thatApr 7 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoDoing anything tomorrow?Apr 7

Jilian OderHey just saw this. I have tea with a friend right after work and then was going to try to get a fewthings done in the brookline area, why what were you thinking ?Apr 8 ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI was going to be busy in the afternoon the next two days, so I thought I'd see if you wanted to takea walk and maybe grab a bite. Oh well.Apr 8

Jilian OderNot walking weather really, yeah i just got in today, i've got stuff going on the next few as welli'm sure we'll figure something soonanything particular on your mind?Apr 8 ∙ Sent from Web

William Constantinohttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=49CCnFnz54s

Apr 9

youtube.com ∙

George Fenton (born George Richard Ian Howe; 19 October 1950) is a British composer best know…The Zero Theorem Soundtrack Karen Souza Creep

Jilian Oder? Have to watch later at work nowApr 9 at 6:41am ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino






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William ConstantinoIt's just a song. Kind of a cool, loungy cover. Thought you might enjoy it. Apr 9 at 9:48am

Jilian OderWill have to listen ?Apr 9 at 11:10am ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderMinus the wurst ok markI mean question markApr 9 at 11:10am ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoAnd Opening Day rehearsal got cancelled for today...probably for the best. It's nasty out there.Apr 9 at 1:19pm

Jilian OderIt's very grossI have the dentist until 4 in coolidge then freeApr 9 at 1:20pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoOh yeah?Apr 9 at 1:20pm

Jilian OderYepApr 9 at 1:21pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWell, I was going to take advantage of the cancellation and have a nap, but I could reasonableexpect to be free in the early evening, if you'd like to get up to something.Apr 9 at 1:24pm

Jilian OderYeah that could be goodApr 9 at 2:01pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI'm having sort of an emotional day fair warningApr 9 at 2:27pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYou got itApr 9 at 2:32pm

Jilian OderFeeling lowApr 9 at 2:41pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino





























Maybe that can be remediedApr 9 at 2:42pm

Jilian OderWould be niceApr 9 at 2:44pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI'm aiming to head out before 7. Let me know if you want to meet in Harvard square, or maybesomewhere closer to you if you don't feel like traveling.Apr 9 at 2:52pm

Jilian OderIt's Nasty out . I feel like curling up in a ball Apr 9 at 2:59pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYou see any of the second season of Broad City?Apr 9 at 3:00pm

Jilian OderI think I'm a few episodes behindThere is a child crying and screaming here at the dentistIm having flashbacks of childhoodApr 9 at 3:01pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoIn the waiting room, or in a dentist's chair?Apr 9 at 3:05pm

Jilian OderJust doneOhThey were in the chairI was in the waiting roomApr 9 at 3:39pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderMust be napping let me know when you are up I'll be home in an hourOr lessApr 9 at 5:00pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderGetting weird snacks at the Vietnamese fusion place down the street from meApr 9 at 5:01pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian Oderso i'm homeApr 9 at 5:52pm ∙ Sent from Web

William Constantino


























Ok. I'm up and in gear.Apr 9 at 6:09pm

Jilian Odercool, what shall we do. i'm honestly still in work clothes and hiding in a blanket.i was going to make super pregnancy induced weird grilled cheesewe can hang here if we're mellow.i'm lookin at your EBAYSApr 9 at 6:10pm ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderoops wrong message lolApr 9 at 6:10pm ∙ Sent from Web

William Constantino

Apr 9 at 6:13pm

William ConstantinoI'd hang out and watch somethingApr 9 at 6:13pm

Jilian Oderok, that sounds ok, i'll let my mom know so she leaves us be.what's your eta? it is rushhour.Apr 9 at 6:16pm ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderHow's the mission?Apr 9 at 7:17pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoSidetracked but enrouteApr 9 at 7:58pm

Jilian Oderokeverything ok?i am eating perhaps the most perverse version of a grilled cheese on earth.Apr 9 at 8:04pm ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoOh yeah? What's in it?Apr 9 at 8:24pm

Jilian Oder
























Apr 9 at 8:25pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderGorgonzola hot pepper jam and cinnamon toastApr 9 at 8:26pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoDamn.Apr 9 at 8:27pm

Jilian OderI can make you oneWhere are you now ?Apr 9 at 8:27pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoPut some pickles and nutella on that bad boy I actually ate. I'm in the Back BayApr 9 at 8:28pm

Jilian Oderyou apparently, see where i'm coming from.bizzarely enough it was not some pregnant mind creation it was a recipe i found online andmodifiedPS i'm not going to shower or change or anything, i'm in pure comfort mode here.Apr 9 at 8:30pm ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI didn't imagine anything else Apr 9 at 8:32pm

Jilian Oder



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ok good.frannie is dead asleep, i'm carbed comaed upApr 9 at 8:41pm ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoVery good. I think this'll be pleasant.And probably the second time you've seen me leave my house without a suit Apr 9 at 8:42pm

Jilian Oderi'm glad you didn't dress upnot that kind of visit.Apr 9 at 8:42pm ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderwhere are you now?Apr 9 at 8:42pm ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoTrain wanted to sit and rot at Kenmore for a minute. Coming out to Fenway in a moment.Apr 9 at 8:47pm

Jilian Oderah, took the D?Apr 9 at 8:47pm ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYepIt was here, and I think arguably fasterApr 9 at 8:48pm

Jilian Oderi think so, little bit of a walk, but doable.Apr 9 at 8:48pm ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderTake yourself to lunch ?Apr 10 at 12:32pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThe Dunkin Donuts in Kenmore was closed, so I did something shameful.I just ate my first McDonald's cheeseburger in about 6 years And I'm at gate D and Eric should be here any minute nowApr 10 at 12:35pm

Jilian OderThat's exciting I didn't know it was with EricApr 10 at 12:55pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino


























Apr 10 at 1:58pm

William Constantino

Apr 10 at 2:10pm

Jilian OderBeautiful !Apr 10 at 2:48pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderOut in 15Apr 10 at 2:48pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderAnd out of hereI'm starvingApr 10 at 3:09pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI'm still at Fenway. Probably done soonish. Where you thinking of eating?Apr 10 at 3:10pm

Jilian OderI don't know island oyster opens at 4 but I may not make itMaybe I'll go sit in eastern standard until the n?Apr 10 at 3:14pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderThen I meanApr 10 at 3:15pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoAlright. Might split from here in a minute.Apr 10 at 3:16pm







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Jilian OderCoolI'm done walking to kenmoreBring Eric if he doesn't hate meI might also wanna walk back down comm or beacon to eat cheaperBut eastern standard for nowApr 10 at 3:20pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderOmg maybe el Pelon?Apr 10 at 3:22pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoOoh...Wow...That'd be awesomeApr 10 at 3:22pm

Jilian OderTotallyYou out of there ?Apr 10 at 3:26pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoFew more minutesApr 10 at 3:27pm

Jilian OderOk I'm going to order a snack here for nowKill it when burritos maybeApr 10 at 3:28pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoBe there soonApr 10 at 3:43pm

Jilian OderOh goodI'm in the bar area at a table near the stairs to the bathroomShould I save you a deviled egg ?Apr 10 at 3:44pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoOnly if you don't want it I won't mind if you doApr 10 at 3:44pm

Jilian OderI will and a croquetteI need room for burritoSoon?Apr 10 at 3:59pm ∙ Sent from Messenger























Jilian OderThis croquette isn't going to make itApr 10 at 4:03pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoDamn Just finishingApr 10 at 4:04pm

Jilian OderEgg is still herevYou know not what my digestive system can do in only momentsApr 10 at 4:06pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI was starvingThen stuffedApr 10 at 4:06pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoS'okApr 10 at 4:06pm

Jilian OderNow starving againApr 10 at 4:06pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino

Apr 10 at 4:07pm

Jilian OderWhat a cutieSo winteryApr 10 at 4:07pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderWith that mini heardBearsBeard I mean !!!How soon . The egg is in peril !!!Apr 10 at 4:08pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino2 minutes


















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Apr 10 at 4:17pm

Jilian OderThen the egg is safeApr 10 at 4:17pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoMr. T Experience Even Hitler Had a Girlfriend: https://youtu.be/ajaejPsU7ok

Apr 10 at 5:08pm

youtube.com ∙

acoustic punk heartacheMr. T Experience Even Hitler Had a Girlfriend

William Constantino

Apr 10 at 8:05pm

imgur.com ∙

The Internet's visual storytelling community. Explore, share, and discuss the best visual stories the I…Philip Jackson. 1944.

William Constantino

Apr 10 at 11:22pm

Jilian OderHey . Passed out at 8:30Apr 11 at 2:02am ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYeah, I slept for a while too. Watching the Red Sox game right now.Like, it's still going on. Top of the 19th right now Apr 11 at 2:04am

Jilian OderNo way, that's wildI mean about the sox. How was shoppingApr 11 at 2:08am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThey didn't have pocket squaresApr 11 at 2:09am

Jilian Oderwell that's unfortunateApr 11 at 2:10am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoShe stormed off on me 10 minutes later. I came home and fell asleep. That's my night.Apr 11 at 2:11am

Jilian Oder







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man molly must really like pocket squares.Apr 11 at 2:11am ∙ Sent from Web

William Constantino

Apr 11 at 2:12am

Jilian OderI'm really sorry things went shitty.Yeah my train was so stop and go, and because i'm jil amplified (tm) i puked on the tracks when igot offApr 11 at 2:13am ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderthen almost all the way home, but managed to keep it togetherThoughts 'yep...still fucking pregnant' and then gave my mom my burrito and passed out until now.Apr 11 at 2:13am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThe Red Sox win!Sorry...but this game was maddeningCan't believe I didn't get an El Guapo while I was there. This will have to be rectified.Apr 11 at 2:15am

Jilian Odernext time i'm getting no meat extra plantain, that's all i really wanted.oh much nicer cover photo.Apr 11 at 2:17am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI figured I was going to change it to that as soon as I took it Apr 11 at 2:17am

Jilian Oderwell, i'm glad i said something anyhow, but i'm also glad you had it in mind beforeyou know, i like you.Apr 11 at 2:19am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYeah, I can be likable I'd been missing you, y'know?Apr 11 at 2:21am

Jilian OderI'd missed you too, even if I didn't show it, i just really needed to prioritize how important it was thatthis pregnancy and kiddo felt cared for.And i know YOU really needed to feel cared for.Apr 11 at 2:22am ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderI think we both feel better after last night.though i might be making assumptions
























Apr 11 at 2:27am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoFeeling relevant is nice Apr 11 at 2:29am

Jilian OderYou are very relevantI actually wish you were here tonight.Apr 11 at 2:31am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoCan't say I don't feel the same way I dreamt I was with you earlier...then woke up alone here on the sofa.Apr 11 at 2:36am

Jilian Oder sexy dreams or just near me?


William ConstantinoJust near youApr 11 at 2:37am

Jilian Odereither way, but that's nice.I'm right here.Apr 11 at 2:38am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI mean, wish I had a sexy one to recount...but just being honest Apr 11 at 2:39am

Jilian OderThat's okay tooI enjoyed our time.Apr 11 at 2:43am ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderI think, though, of all the 'sexy stuff' that I really missed kissing you most.Apr 11 at 2:43am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYeah. I felt that too.I might fall asleep again soonApr 11 at 2:47am

Jilian Oderhttp://www.scientificamerican.com/article/thebrainsofourfathers/

Fathers and their children reshape one another's neuronsThe Brains of Our Fathers: Does Parenting Rewire Dads?





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scientificamerican.com ∙

Jilian Odergood one to read later.not meant to make you said, you were just talking about biology, so I googled around.Apr 11 at 2:49am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoTold you that you were fucking with my biology Apr 11 at 2:51am

Jilian OderRead it sillyApr 11 at 2:53am ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI just did. I've read about the prolactin study before too Apr 11 at 2:54am

Jilian OderPretty coolHad no ideaApr 11 at 2:55am ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThanks for the linkApr 11 at 2:56am

Jilian OderNo problemI find cool parenting links a lotApr 11 at 2:56am ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderShould I send them your way?Apr 11 at 2:57am ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoSureApr 11 at 2:57am

Jilian OderOk I didn't know if it was weirdI hope I get to see you tomorrowApr 11 at 2:58am ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI was just thinking the same thingApr 11 at 2:58am

Jilian Oder







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I'm glad you are feeling sleepy thoughHow's your brains ? Happy ?Apr 11 at 3:02am ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThey'll be alrightApr 11 at 3:04am

Jilian OderI'm glad to hear thatIt's better than beforeApr 11 at 3:04am ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoIt isApr 11 at 3:05am

Jilian OderWhat do you think of Olivia ?You've probably drifted offGoodnightApr 11 at 3:21am ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian Oder

Apr 11 at 9:24am ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI have a stalkerApr 11 at 9:24am ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino














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Apr 11 at 12:48pm

Jilian OderMorning !Apr 11 at 12:49pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI needed to catch up.Apr 11 at 12:50pm

Jilian OderGlad you didApr 11 at 12:50pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderBrunch at Barcelona with momApr 11 at 1:55pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoSounds pretty sweetApr 11 at 2:08pm

Jilian OderAll dressed upCute round belly pic Apr 11 at 2:10pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian Oder

Apr 11 at 2:10pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino

Been a while since I've seen you dressed up














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Apr 11 at 2:37pm

Jilian OderIt's nice to doApr 11 at 2:38pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI will tonight tooApr 11 at 2:38pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian Oderback from movies with mom, gonna make treats for this party, i may just uber it there, I am feelinglazy and the public transport might stop me from goingApr 11 at 6:27pm ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoWhat time would you head over if you do go?Apr 11 at 6:51pm

Jilian OderI am four likely calling an uber near 9What's your deal?!(I meant for the eveningApr 11 at 7:23pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoMight meet with JP for a bit. Thinking of bailing on Medford. Either way, I should end up near whereyou'd be going and before too long. And if you didn't go, I could easily change where I wind up Apr 11 at 7:30pm

Jilian OderI'm totally gonna go. Fair warning, muffin may go, if we end up at this thing together, but i'll tell herthat you are awesome and not stupid.;pi'll suss out the situation regardless, and if it's awesome, you should come by, if not, i'll leave andwe'll hang out :_Apr 11 at 7:35pm ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderHow's things ?It's ok here nothing crazyYou go to Malden ?Apr 11 at 10:09pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI may not find myself here forever I'd love to see youApr 11 at 10:19pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI didn't go to Malden. I'm nearby. Apr 11 at 10:20pm

Jilian Oder

























Jilian OderOh goodyHanging w people ?Apr 11 at 10:20pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoNope. Just grabbing a quick bite and waiting to see if you think it'd be cool to invite me or not Was supposed to meet JP, but he crapped out.Apr 11 at 10:28pm

Jilian OderBoo !Yeah it's cool to come byApr 11 at 10:28pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderTalked to bday galApr 11 at 10:28pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoCool. Address? 872?Apr 11 at 10:30pm

Jilian Oder827Second floorThere's a signApr 11 at 10:31pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWord. I have a little bit, or should I hustle?Apr 11 at 10:31pm

Jilian OderCome by soon only cause I wanna see you Apr 11 at 10:32pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderThere's food hereApr 11 at 10:32pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWordOk. Wrapping up at Galway House. There soon.Apr 11 at 10:43pm

William ConstantinoOk, I'm not great at mornings. But I've got platonic friends that'll kiss me on the lips. Guess me andyou are a step down from that.Apr 12 at 9:47am

Jilian Oder



























You are TERRIBLE at mornings, and i'm sorry, it wasn't intended to hurt your feelings, just becausei chose not to does not put me below platonic friends.Apr 12 at 9:48am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoWell, didn't seem like you're very comfortable with meApr 12 at 9:49am

Jilian OderI told you I can't promise you anything, i've got a lot of moods going on, and i know you do too.Apr 12 at 9:50am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYour prerogativeApr 12 at 9:50am

Jilian OderI was comfrotable enough to let you stay in my bed, that's pretty big.Apr 12 at 9:50am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoDon't worry about it.Apr 12 at 9:52am

Jilian OderI hope I don't have to. Let's have a nice time weds, do the dr. thing, have some food, some goodtalks.Apr 12 at 9:54am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoJust pointing out that I didn't think that was a big deal.Unfortunately you didSo, sorryApr 12 at 9:55am

Jilian OderThat what wasn't a big deal? your crankiness? the no kisses?Whichever, I apreciate the apologies. I'm unsure friendship is going to be the easiest road for us,but we'll get there.Apr 12 at 10:06am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoGuess I've got a better idea of where we standApr 12 at 10:18am

Jilian Oderdo tell?Apr 12 at 10:19am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoWell, you were obviously uncomfortable with me kissing you on the lips. That gives me a prettygood idea of where we stand.


























Apr 12 at 10:25am

Jilian OderGood point.I hope i'll still see you weds.Apr 12 at 10:27am ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderDid they ever let you into fenway?Apr 12 at 10:27am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThey always doApr 12 at 10:30am

Jilian Oderhaha. awesome.Apr 12 at 10:30am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoJust didn't think it was a big deal on the scheme of things. Guess it meant more to me than Ithought. My bad.Apr 12 at 10:33am

Jilian OderI appreciate you being self aware...it's my fault though for not knowing where my boundaries lieuntil i'm there and being sort of a rejecty dickbag, i don't like that feeling.Apr 12 at 10:35am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoEasy solution. I just won't put myself out there. Problem solved.Apr 12 at 10:43am

Jilian OderI hope you do whatever you need to do.Apr 12 at 10:44am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoWell, I felt better the other day. Oh well. Have fun. See you Wednesday.Apr 12 at 10:53am

Jilian OderI'm sorry you're feeling weird, I'm looking forward to seeing you, i hope you are able to have somefun between now and then.Let's meet at my work at 2, let me know if you wanna switch that up, but should work.Apr 12 at 10:55am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI wouldn't say I'm feeling weird, but apparently you are.Look, I'm sorry. Guess there's not much to discuss here.Apr 12 at 11:41am

Jilian Oder



























Jilian OderI'm trying not to, because theres some aspects here that are going really awesomeApr 12 at 11:44am ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoThat's great for you. I'm going to get off of Facebook for a day or so. Ttyl.Apr 12 at 11:52am

Jilian OderOkApr 12 at 11:52am ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoLooks like that's next to impossible to do on mobile Apr 12 at 12:00pm

Jilian OderYou can just delete the app for nowApr 12 at 12:00pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI'd love to know where the heck your head is at though. It's a mystery to me.Apr 12 at 12:00pm

Jilian OderI want to be your friend. I'm glad we had sex it's weird but it's like we had to emote that way to healsomeI don't think I'm in a place where I can share that intimate space with youApr 12 at 12:01pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoAnd now you offer me less than I'm used to getting from most of my friends while asking for morethan anybody I've ever known.Apr 12 at 12:01pm

William ConstantinoYou've got chutzpah. Anyone ever tell you that?Apr 12 at 12:02pm

Jilian OderNoThough upon googling it I agreeApr 12 at 12:08pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino" In Hebrew, chutzpah is used indignantly, to describe someone who has overstepped theboundaries of accepted behavior. In traditional usage, the word expresses a strong sense ofdisapproval, condemnation and outrage."Glad we agreeApr 12 at 12:10pm

Jilian Oder



























What I read is it meant you had audacityNerveApr 12 at 12:11pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderBallsGood thing I'm not JewishApr 12 at 12:11pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantinohttps://m.youtube.com/watch?v=n2LJv21V0PoMonday at 10:17pm

Jilian OderWell that's near perfectTuesday at 6:17pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYou there?Yesterday at 1:59pm

Jilian OderYeah at work still need to change outside in 5You ?Yesterday at 2:02pm ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoNo, I don't need to changeI'm by the fountain next doorYesterday at 2:05pm

William ConstantinoFriends usually don't treat their friends like you just treated me.But I'm sure I can get past that." Orders denying one parent any visitation are rare but they are made when necessary to protectthe child."I was just stating the facts.Actually surprised you'd try to leverage access to our child in order to compel me to go toappointments with you. Appointments that I already agreed to go to, no less! 11 hours ago

William ConstantinoAnd...I'll just assume you're gonna cut me off for a bit.11 hours ago

Jilian OderYou said 'if i make it....' i raged out.I need you here for the whole thing or not at all, it's proof that you are in for this.That's more what I meant.Iturns out I am pregnant, so there's that. A bit feisty when it comes to my kid





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our kid11 hours ago ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderThese are my stipulations: Do this or don't , just let me know now.11 hours ago ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI want the kid. You don't want me. You don't have to make stipulations. But that seems likenegotiating in bad faith to me.11 hours ago

Jilian OderI'm protecting myself and this child.Are you going to show up for appoitments?within your schedule of course?11 hours ago ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoFact: If I claim or am pursued for paternity, I will, at minimum, likely be granted visitation.11 hours ago

Jilian OderIf you file for it.11 hours ago ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderIt is not automaticbut I will be discussing that with a lawyeras i imagine you will tooI want you to have visitationbut you have to show me you are interested11 hours ago ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoCertainly. As an unmarried woman, sole physical and legal custody default to you. Once mypaternity is established, different matter.11 hours ago

Jilian Oderthat means showing up11 hours ago ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian OderWill you show up?11 hours ago ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoYou just, right after the first ultrasound, threatened to withhold access to our child if I didn't go toyour appointments. Appointments I already said I would attend. This kid is not your bargaining chipto get what you want from me. I find it appalling that you already went in that direction.11 hours ago























Jilian OderI was lividBe appalled. I'm sorry.11 hours ago ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoLivid with me and at me is fine. You threatened my relationship with the child.11 hours ago

Jilian OderWeds May 6th, 5:20 PM, will you show up?11 hours ago ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoAlready had told you yes11 hours ago

Jilian OderAre you saying yes now?You said your parenting started when this baby arrivedthat's not how i see itThat's where I got madI'll be done being mad, when you say you'll be there.That's not a threat, that's just where I stand.11 hours ago ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoHow you see it isn't the be all end all of reality. Sorry to be the one to tell you.11 hours ago

Jilian OderWell you know, if i don't claim paterinity or child support, we won't have to worry about any of this.You'll be free!!!!!I'm sure i'll calm down about visitiation, but i'll sure as shit get to know my rights if you don't showme that you want in on this.11 hours ago ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoListen: I want to work with you on this. You wanted to know if I could be your friend. By waffling Igot to find out you had been dishonest with me before sleeping with me again, threatened that I'dnever see my kid, told that "you'd shred me", and generally treated very shabbily while beingnothing but patient and civil in return.11 hours ago

William ConstantinoBut that's understandable, because you're angry.But I deserve a lot better treatment than that.11 hours ago

Jilian OderAgreed























Moving forward, i will treat you with respect11 hours ago ∙ Sent from Web

Jilian Oderand I hope you realize that i'm not really ...tame as a pregnant woman full of hormones at themoment11 hours ago ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoMan...I only ever wanted to love you. And man, I've suffered for that.The lie hurt. I think I took it well, but I feel pretty stupid now. I mean, I had figured, but when youtold me you hadn't been with anyone, it made me feel a little less lonely than I had been feeling.10 hours ago

Jilian OderI'm sorry i liedi wasn't even thinking10 hours ago ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoSorry. I should keep this to myself.10 hours ago

Jilian OderWhatever you want.10 hours ago ∙ Sent from Web

William ConstantinoI'd like you to care, but I'm not sure that's forthcoming.10 hours ago

William ConstantinoAnd I don't recall saying anything to the effect of "if you make it". Any context you could providewould be appreciated.I'm unfriended again? Wow...just general bad faith from you all around.6 hours ago

Jilian OderI don't know if you are referring to with 'if you make it' I need context to give you contextWhy is being my Facebook friend important to you ? I'm still speaking with you3 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYou wrote "You said 'if i make it....' i raged out."3 hours ago

William ConstantinoCouldn't quite place it in any context where I said that last night3 hours ago

Jilian Oder


























You said something about maybe not showing up for appointmentI remember this because I then reacted3 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWhy is it important to me? Well, I didn't think I abused the privilege...3 hours ago

Jilian OderThat's not an answer3 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThen BOOM! Not friends with you anymore3 hours ago

Jilian OderWhy do you care about social media ?3 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderIt doesn't mean anything3 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThen why did you delete me..againI never did that to youAnd you deleted me and anyone who was my friendThen added me back, then deleted me again3 hours ago

Jilian OderWell I didn't think you were acting like a friendYou wouldn't say you would3 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI think I was. I've been honest with you. Being a friend doesn;t mean agreeing all the time. And Ithink I was very patient, and very kind, even in the face of abuse.3 hours ago

Jilian OderI asked you if you could be3 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI'm worried about you3 hours ago

Jilian OderI'm sorry ?3 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger


























William ConstantinoI've showed up to every appointment that I've agreed to.3 hours ago

Jilian OderIs this for the lawyers ?3 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYou don;t have any interest in me romantically. That's ok.3 hours ago

Jilian OderSuddenly it's ok!!!What do you want from me ?3 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoFrom the get go I told you I wanted updates to your medical status as concerns the child. That's allthere.Then you wanted to say hello.I resisted.Then I wanted to explore that3 hours ago

Jilian OderThen I backed off3 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoBut you moved on. Fair?3 hours ago

Jilian OderThen you wanted dinner3 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYou moved on. Fair?3 hours ago

Jilian OderMoved on ? Not quite3 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWell, neither had I, but I was refused, blatantly, and repeatedly.So, ok?I mean, we did sleep together again.3 hours ago

William Constantino



























William ConstantinoBut you had told me you had had no new, partners...to protect my feelings.But that wasn't the case. I think I responded well. Without anger or antipathy.Now, we disagree about what my rights to this child may be/ You wish to tie it to my presence withyour prenatal care. Much of which I already agreed to be participatory in.3 hours ago

Jilian OderDo you want to be my friend ?You don't seem to want toPlease answerYour rights fall in what the court decided2 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI'd rather bring an amicable agreement to the courtBut I need you in on thisAre you in ?Ok well I'm assuming silence is a no ?2 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI think I've been more than friendly. Being your friend? I don't wish to be obligated to you with sucha nebulous term with no rights or privileges. A blood test will prove if I'm a father or not. And I wouldadore the opportunity to be. We don't have to be antagonistic to each other. My actions towardsyou, especially after last night, should speak for themselves. I have this child's interest at heart. It'sbest we don't let our personal desires interfere with that.2 hours ago

Jilian OderI agree. Oh a paternity test now ? That's bitterYou know if you request it you pay for it2 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino?2 hours ago

Jilian OderThat's the law2 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoCertainly not2 hours ago

Jilian OderOh yes it is2 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoUm























2 hours ago

Jilian OderThat one I'm sure of2 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThat was to the previous line2 hours ago

William ConstantinoOh, my sweet summer child 2 hours ago

Jilian Oder'A blood test will prove...'Look at your last paragraph2 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYou told me last night you wouldn;t name me as the father, correct?2 hours ago

Jilian OderI said I could choose not to.I will likely for services for this childAnd for your being a father2 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThat you would withhold that if I didn;t appear at prenatal appointments of your choosing2 hours ago

Jilian OderWhich I don't not want2 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoOk. You told me you could choose to witholod that then2 hours ago

Jilian OderI didn't say thatNot on recordNice try though2 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYou said "Well, I don;t have to put you on the birth cirtificate!"2 hours ago

Jilian Oder



























I neither confirm nor deny thisYou think I'm an idiot ?2 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoDoesn;t matter, because I willingly sign it, or you have to sue for paternity. I was already willing toaccept.2 hours ago

Jilian OderOk then2 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI should probably be safe though. Any lawyer would probably tell me that.2 hours ago

Jilian OderIt's not a problem then2 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWell, we're already in "I'll neither confirm or deny" bullshit with you.2 hours ago

Jilian OderIf I'm not looking at a war here I'm interested in making this easy on both of usShow up May 6thDon't be my friend if you don't want toBut show upI'd rather be friendsBut you don't want that2 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI'll posit that if you never said that, you probably wouldn't be so fucking cutesy glib with that reply.And I've wanted to keep this as far from litigious as possible. You were the one who said that "you'dshred me".2 hours ago

Jilian OderI was angryAnd apologized2 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYou've lied to me, and threatened me. I've not come close to doing that to you.2 hours ago

Jilian OderWell certainly threatened2 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger
























William ConstantinoI called you a cunt once and apologized.2 hours ago

Jilian OderNot one but two times hanging outYou'll never get a penny out of me even if the president makes me2 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderYou saidHope you can keep it to termI despise youYou are an idiotSummer fucking childYou saidNothing but kind ? Lately yes2 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderHorseshit in total2 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoWould I have slept with you if I knew you had partners in the interim?I mean, that was your prerogativeAnd it was "oh, my sweet summer child". Not an Fbomb to be had, and certainly not a threat.Hell, it was just a couple of lines ago! I really worry about you though.I've told you time and time again I'd be there May 6th. Are we clear that you've said if I don;t attendprenatal medical appointments with you (that I already said I would) that you'd deny me access orvisitation?2 hours ago

Jilian OderIt will make me not want to , because fathering starts now the rest is up to the courtBut I can't deny you anything that I can't deny youI'll be looking into my rights certainly as should youWhy are you worried for me ? I'm fine I successfully carried a child through tretchary andheartbreakI feel like 1000000 dollarsFocus on getting yourself safe happy and employed. Show up for appointments. Be my friend ornotThat's what I ask of you and of storyShow up now so I can trust you to show up laterI have only only this kids best interest in mind and I need you sane, putting in, and heathyOh good you are still thereNo response ?2 hours ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William Constantino


https://m.facebook.com/william.constantino











https://m.facebook.com/jilian.oder




William ConstantinoI only have this kid's best interest in mind. My attending prenatal has more to do with your piece ofmind than my propensity for fatherhood. You want to tie the two together. I was offering to goanyway. Maybe you got skittish when you admitted you lied to me. But you leveraged my access tothis kid dependant on that. I'll still go, but you've been nothing approaching fair to me at all.Not being friends didn't necessarily equate being adversaries. If you can tell me where you've beena friend to me, I'd love to hear it.Doesn't, but didn'tI've tried kindness and tenderness and romance with you. You lied to protect my feelings, but Ithink I've shown that wasn't necessary. I've expressed interest in your medical situation vis a visour child right from the beginning.You've demanded friendship. You've refused anything more. My concerns are with our child'supbringing and well being.If I didn't hesitate to offer you the friendship you wanted, would I have found out about your deceit?I mean, I can live with it. But I would've hated living without knowing.1 hour ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI'm a terribly liar so likely1 hour ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI've tried with you. I think I really have. I've been honest and forthcoming. Even vulnerable.You really seem to have some hangups, and even said a lot of then are from past relationships, noteven with me. And don't worry, this shit never comes up in family court...But my hangups with you involve my relationship with you. You're free to do with your body whatyou please, carrying my child or not.But you lied, while insisting I be your friendYou've never been my friend as far as I can tell1 hour ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderFine . Friendship over then. I have my answer1 hour ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoI wish you no harm. I really only wish the best for you.1 hour ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderOk and same to youAnd the kidSo co parents it is1 hour ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoYou're real quick to get this defined for yourself, huh?1 hour ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderIt's safe to have labels



















Write a message...

Less iffy1 hour ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoGonna leave me off the birth certificate if it suits you?I just can't shake the feeling your attitude is "I said that because I was angry, but you made meangry!"1 hour ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderI'm not leaving you off anything1 hour ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoFriendship over...I was still trying, but I think that's what you want. Were you tearing up the othernight because I was making it hard for you to hate me and just move on romantically?Did you think that finally admitting you'd been with other men would make me jealous enough togive up any dreams of us having a household together with our child?1 hour ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderNo no noNone of those1 hour ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoThat wasn't my reaction, FWIW1 hour ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderYou won't answer me about being friends except to say I'm not friendlyI don't want to give up either1 hour ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

William ConstantinoTo be fair, I've been civil.1 hour ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

Jilian OderLately yesBut you can't tell me yes or no to friendshipI'm willing to try harder to be friendly honest and kind moving forward1 hour ago ∙ Sent from Messenger

















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