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In 4-H Youth Development Bullying NDSU Extension Service Center for 4-H Youth Development. What is CHARACTER COUNTS!?. The Six Pillars of Character. TRUSTWORTHINESS – honesty, integrity, promise-keeping, loyalty RESPECT – courtesy, nonviolence, tolerance, autonomy - PowerPoint PPT Presentation
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In 4-H Youth Development
Bullying
NDSU Extension ServiceCenter for 4-H Youth Development
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What is CHARACTER COUNTS!?
CHARACTER COUNTS! is more than character development curricula
The Six Pillars of Character
TRUSTWORTHINESS – honesty, integrity, promise-keeping, loyalty
RESPECT – courtesy, nonviolence, tolerance, autonomy
RESPONSIBILITY – duty, accountability, pursuit of excellence, self-restraint
FAIRNESS – openness, consistency, impartiality
CARING – kindness, compassion, empathy CITIZENSHIP – civic virtue, lawfulness,
common good
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Caring
• Concern for others’ well-being• Compassion• Empathy• Kindness and consideration• Charity• Sacrifice• Gratitude• Mercy and forgiveness
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Caring
Always be kind.
If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all – hurtful words have a lasting impact.
I have to show concern for others’ well-being.
I should act compassionately and with empathy.
I need to be kind and considerate.
I should practice charity, make sacrifices, and show gratitude.
I have to be willing to show mercy and forgiveness.
CARINGPositive values to instill
I will be a better person and live a more worthy life if I act on the following beliefs:
A Caring Person Is:
Compassionate and empathetic
Kind, loving, and considerate
Thankful and expresses gratitude
Forgiving of others
A Caring Person Is Not:
Mean, cruel, or insensitive
Selfish or self-centered
Too busy to lend a helping hand
Creating a Culture of Kindness
• In a Culture of Kindness, differences are accepted and celebrated.
• In a Culture of Kindness, it’s all for one and one for all; people stand up for and next to each other.
Pepper Experiment
• Step 1: Sprinkle the pepper in the water. • Step 2: Hold the soap in the middle of the
pepper for 3 seconds. Do not drop it in.• Step 3: Pour the sugar in the center of the water.
10 ©2012 Josephson Institute.
NDSU Extension 4-H Youth Development’s Definition of Bullying
Bullying behavior is defined as unwanted deliberate negative action by another individual or group of individuals with
intent to harm. Bullying may inflict harm or distress, including physical, social, sexual,
psychological, or educational harm. Bullying often includes an imbalance of
power between individuals/groups.
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The Triple D’s of BullyingDANGEROUS•Someone might
get hurt
DESTRUCTIVE
•Something might get broken, damaged, or destroyed
•Someone repeatedly teases or bullies other people
DISCRIMINATORY
•Someone’s core identity is ridiculed
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When 4-H’ers understand that they are responsible for their fellow 4-H members’ well-being, they are less likely to exhibit these behaviors and more likely to intervene if they see them.
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Is It Teasing or Bullying?
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Good-Natured Teasing
• Playful between BOTH people
• Uses a friendly tone• Encourages
friendships• Doesn’t lead to
physical confrontations
• Sometimes lightens a tense moment
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Hurtful Teasing
• Uses angry tone• Includes hostile body
language• Continues even when
distress is evident• Continues even when
the topic is upsetting to others
• Is accompanied by taunting or showing off
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Cyberbullying can include any of the following:
• Pretending to be someone else online• Sending threatening or mean messages• Posting/forwarding embarrassing images• Using information found online to harass• Setting up popularity polls • Creating an account as someone else
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Do• Intervene if you see/become aware of bullying
behaviors• Regularly discuss how to demonstrate caring
and respect• Establish clear guidelines for 4-H club and
activity conduct • Have a plan for handling incidents• Take all incidents seriously• Communicate with 4-H’ers and
parents/caregivers about processes if these incidents occur
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Don’t …
• Wait until there is a serious problem to start building a culture of kindness
• Blame the victim — no one deserves to be bullied
• Confront 4-H’ers about these issues in front of other 4-H’ers
• Get hung up on the details of finger-pointing — the bullying behavior must stop.
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Research shows
If one bystander says, “Stop it,” 50 percent of the time the bullying ends in 10 seconds or less.
If two or more people speak up, the bullying usually stops in 10 seconds or less.
“Bullying is a Relationship Problem” -Dr. Wendy Craig, Queens University
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Show them how
Adults are the role models here. If you are not pro-active in addressing negative behaviors, your 4-H’ers will not be either.
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Ways to prepare 4-H’ers to act
• Role play• Brainstorm strategies• Determine which adults they are most
comfortable talking to• Think of non-confrontational ways to
intervene• Recognize the strengths youth bring to the
situation
.
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Can 4-H’ers answer these?
• What can you do to help?• Whom should you ask for help?• What could you do if this happens again?• What should you do
after you have seen
something?
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Help 4-H’ers Keep Perspective
• Remind youth that there are many people in their lives who care about them.
• Use exercises and discussions to build social problem-solving skills
• Encourage 4-H’ers to consider whose opinions really matter
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Ways of Working with 4-H Youth
• Weave caring and respect through 4-H activities
and curriculum
• Have a “4-H Participation Expectations” meeting
with 4-Hers, volunteers and caregivers
• Encourage service learning