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Australian President callsSoviet leader Leonid Brehznev" A Dodo"

Australia devastated by nuclearholocaust:-Western Powerssuppress story

pSuper8MIT President Jerry Wreisnervacationing In AustraliaPaul Gray to assumePresidency earlier than ex-pected

- -- 16UFO lands in Bexleycourtyard; occupants taken toLobdell for lunch; inter-platnetary retaliation feared.

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Study shows ducks useful

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'ContinuousMovie Showings

- Since 1951

Volume 27, Number X

LSCCambridge

Massachusetts

Thursday, March 13. 1980

race, in which GAble is killed, butnot before revealing that he is stillmadly in love with formerCambridge Mayor Alfred Vellucci.

Originally entitled Brian ofNazareth, Life of Brian producedwidespread controversy by manyreligious groups, who called thefilm "sacreligious," "heretical,"and "entirely too funny for bor-ing stuffed shirts like ourselves."Among the groups picketingtheatres showing Brian were theThird Brian Adventists, and OurLady Brian of the Melons.

The tilm's success has alreadyinspired a flock of exploitativeimitations, such as Ben-Brian, InSearch of Historic Brian, and thenew rock opera Brian Cohen,Superstar* "Honk If You LoveBrian" bumper stickers arespringing up everywhere, witheven President Jimmy Carterwearing one on his forehead dur-ing a recent press conference. TheFBI reports that incidents ofcrucifictions are up 320 percentduring the last six months, and aiman calling himself Brian Kingrecently threw all the moneylenders out of Newark, NewJersey.

By Pontius IscariotHumphrey Bogart's favorite

film will make its rabidly awaited.MIT premiere this Saturday,March 15. Show times will be6:00; 8:30, and 11:00 in 26100and 7:00 and 9:30 in 10-250.

This brand-new, outrageouslyfunny comedy stars MarilynMonroe and Clark Gable, in ad-dition to the entire Python-group-and dozens of extras. The plotrevolves around Brian Cohen,(played by. Monroe) the simpleson of a Nazareth dentist inRoman-occupied Palestine.

Brian professes to be able tocure leukemia, make omeletteswithout breaking eggs, and turn-peanut butter into shampoo. Heis immediately seized upon by thedowntrodden people of Palestineas the new Messiah who will freethem from all the Roman opposi-tion, such as skyrocketing tuitionand forced commons.

Brian, however, wants only tobe left alone to enjoy his hobby ofmating birds with amphibians, sohe and Gable flee to Tunisia, set-ting.up the.movie's most hilariousline, "This must be Tunisia."Then comes the thrilling chariot

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/est watch out

demolitionists. The plan is soonforgotten as New York -is reducedto rubble from the blast of tbe ex-ploding hydrogen bomb, hiddenin the Statue of Liberty by theFrench when they gave it to theUnited States in 1886 and set toexplode in 90 years.

With New York destroyed andWashington in shambles, theleadership of the nation falls onPocatello, Idaho, the home of our

((o/"rilrl ed 0/ Page 6)

Shrew- 1By HoufOr N. jethro

Taining of the- Shrew will be'shown by LSC this Sunifday at 6:30and 9:30 in 26-100. The followingreview of 'thefil '_ is reprintedfrom the February 14, 1977 issueof hTke Focus!:

Richard Burton and ElizabethTaylor are back together again,this time for the Franco Zefferelliproduction of Shakespeare's im-mortal comedy The Taining of theShrew. The film also featuresMichael York as well as specialguest star Victor Spinetti, and isthe timeless story of a man whonmarries a woman for her. dowrydespite the fact that she is anotorious nag. What follows are aseries of rollicking verbal battlesand a wild chase scene across theAlps on dog sled.

Especially memorable is thebeginning of the second act, whenBurton and Taylor meet Gableand Monroe on the 8th AvenueIRT in New York City and decideto go into business as free-lance

By, Gorill Vard up with C 'nneryfor the heist. HisThrilling adventure and Dolby character is described in the

stereo await you at this ~FridayNs publicity material for the film asshowing of The Grpeat Train Ro- "'foppish," which I looked up inbery at 7:00 and 10:00 in 26-100. Webster's. It means "evoking or

The Great. Train Robbery, evincing memories of spoiled por-which has been called "the very ridge." I didn't bother looying upbest film made during the last 25 porridge, but if you'll remember,years" " (according to the it's what the bears were eating inproducer's mother) stars Sean Goldilocks. The starring trio isConnery, Donald Sutherland, rounded out by Leslie-Anneand Leslie-Anne Down. It was Down of Upstairs, Downstairswritten and directed by Michael fame, who goes through the entireCrichton, whose other ac- film exhibiting her ample figure incomplishments include The incredibly revealing, sexyAndromeda Strain and Coma. costumes like the one pictured

The movie is based on an actual here.event, the very first train robbery The Film was shot in Ireland,back in 1855 Victorian England. but received only minor woundsSean Connery plays the cool vil- and recovered. The film was laterlain who plans and executes the shot twice in Hong Kong, anddaring crime. Donald Sutherland this time one of the bullets lodgedplays the pickpocket who teams (continued on page 6)

Of Teddy Kennedy's seven-teen proven illegitimatechildren, se'ven have shownclear psychic tendencies.Indeed, Melinda, his daughterby Mrs. Penny Haff ofHangover, New Hampshire,correctly predicted the ap-pearance of the fleet of flyingsaucers at last year's bizzarretragedy in Guyana. TheUFO's which materialized atthe -People's Temple cult .grounds coincided with a sud-den outbreak of sunspots andthe birth of twin Test TubeBabies to Farrah Fawcett Ma-jors and Cheryl Ladd.

Farrah's test tube baby, aswell as her notorious es-capades with Warren Beattycould spell the end to her mar-riage with former Six MillionDollar Man Steve Majors. Thebreak-up was predicted fouryears ago by Phyllis Cornwal-lis, the psychic of Newark,New Jersey, who alsopredicted the cocaine chargessurrounding White House

-Chief of Staff HamiltonJordan and former CambridgeMayor Alfred Vellucci.

The National InquisitorDecember 7, 1492

By Penguin TangentsuThis week's tasteful Classics

Film features the energetic com-edy of Buster Keaton in "Steam-boat Bill, Jr." It will be shown onFriday, March 14 at 7:30 in 10-250. The Famous Keaton short"Cops" will also be shown.

"Stearnboat Bill, Jr." was thelast film that Keaton starred in,wrote, directed, and in generalcreatively controlled. In addition,he played all 350,000 extras, pro-jected the film in all 275 theatreswhere it opened, and single-handedly constructed 180 of thosetheatres in seven hours flat. In theFilm, Keaton plays the son of aSteamboat captain. His father hashigh hopes for his son, but notonly does he prove to be ahopeless shlepp, but he falls inlove with the rival captain'sdaughter. His father is incensed,especially after Keaton killsPetruchio. Things become evenmore complex after Tonv andMaria meet after the rumble, andsing, "What Are We Going To

Do About Maria'?" then all thenuns.go to tlie palace where theKing is dying, and he tells themthat "I think you're CharltonHeston shall have been a fool,etcetera, etcetera." Kirk tellsSpock to beam up, but Spock hasFallen in love with Monroe, andthe Vulcan's horn is up. A jealousGable stabs Spock, but theVulcan sets his phaser on 'clot'and repairs the damage. In theFinal moving scene of the film,Bogart and former CambridgeMayor Alfred Velluci go offtogether to join a Free Frenchgarrison near Brazaville.

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Millenial Volume

McCormick 3rd

~XPEF

Steamboat Bill, Jr,

_ I PAGE 2 THE FOCUS THURSDAY, MARCH 13, 1980 I l -; .

A Look At The Upsoming New 38 HampreiI I ~ -% ",I

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By Witmond and JerkoverWith the 1984 New Hampshire

primary approaching, many can-didates have already begunpreparing and organizing for thatbellweather of presidential cam-paigns. The primary looks to bean exciting race, and today TheFocus! takes a look at how thecandidates are faring in their earlycampaigning.

President John Anderson (seephoto) is given the nod as havingthe best organization in the state,although his popularity hasdecreased somewhat followinglast year's dramatic leap in infla-tion from two percent to five per-cent.

His main opposition will comefrom Ronald Raygun, makting hisfourth bid for the nomination atage 73. Raygun, whose campaignschedule is considerably limitedby his confinement to awheelchair and an iron lung, hasnevertheless made inroads onPresident Anderson's support byhis vows to drive the Soviet armyout of Mexico and Australia.

The third man in this two manrace is undoubtedly HowardBaker. Baker's main platform ishis plan to rescue the fiftyAmericans still being held hostagein Iran. Baker plans to use thenewest addition to the Americanmilitary arsenal, a very large stickmade of very hard wood (seephoto).

If the primary were held tomor-row, Anderson would probably.

nose out Raygun 45 percent to 40percent, with Baker garnering tenpercent and minor candidates likeDole, Stassen and formerCambridge Mayor Alfred Velluccisplitting the remainder; accordingto the most recent CBS-G3alloppole.

On the Democratic side, TeddyKennedy will try to regain theparty's nomination, but despitehis popularity in his New Englandbackyard, voters are sure toremember his startling defeat atthe hands of John Anderson in1980, 89 percent to 11 percent.Kennedy's campaign directorshave Just made a critical decisionto dye Teddy's hair and give hima facelift to restore his youthfulappearance and re-capture publicperception of the almost mysticalKennedy vigor (see photo).

Other candidates in the race in-clude current World HeavyweightBoxing Champion MohammedAli, one-term MassachusettsGoverner Ed King, and formerCalifornia Governor Jerry Brown,now 22 years old.

Brown's chances ar- not ex-pected to be affected by hisdivorce last month from rock starLinda Rondstadt, but he has beenhurt by being branded a flakebecause of his call for the legaliza-tion of meditation.

The Harris poll gives Kennedy60 percent, Brown 15 percent, Alithree percent, and Uncommitted22 percent. King is not expectedto get any votes.

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A Ie DATE OF POLES

Zengm Senator Edward Kennedy

#1) Raygun tells famous ethnic jokeabout black Pope.

#2) Raygun's heart transplant is atotal success.

#3) Kennedy admits that he lied.aboutChapakwidik.

#4) Mary Joe Kopechne discovered tobe alive.

#5) Former Cambridge Mayor Alfred Velluciannounces plan to ban all recombinantDNA research in Manchester; NH.

#6) Popular 50¢/gallon gas tax repealed.

#7) Brown decides to go with the flow--shares-the experience of campaigningwith the voters.

#8) The Big Dipper.

l MIIII _ Governor Ronald Raygun

a-----_ Governor Jerry Brown

INNEWORN President John Anderson

-- sir 1 Mayor Alfred Velluci

* * * * * * Senator Howard Baker

Governor Ed King

UNCOMMITTED (Democrat)

I

LectureHouse

By Cones B. BygonesLSC has just purchased a 17-

rooII farmhouse in NorthPorlnret, Vermont. The structure,to be known as Lecture House,will be available for weekend useby members of the MIT comrnunity.

Lecture House will bescheduled in a radically differentIma~nner than MIT's other off-calmpus retreats. Applications willbe solicited monthly and the fol-lowing rules will apply:

1. Students will be givenpreference over Deans, ad-ininistrators, and children.

2. Groups will be required toI ill out their forms truthfully.(Persons interested in continuingthe practice of submitting er-roneous forrs for their own en-joynlent ra;Ly still do so. However,applicants using pseudonymousgroup titles or fictitious names ofIMembers will be put on man-datory commons and their re-quest will be rejected.)

3. Applications will be open topublic inspection, though theywill be withheld from the CIA.

4. Decisions will be made in anopen scanner by a group of stu-dents, all of wlom have at leasthigh school educations and the.ability to tell a believable lie.

LSC hopes that these policieswill provide the mlaximum benefitto the M IT community.C omnplaints, however, may beSbihnitted in writin- to Robert L.I-alliflnan, Acting Dean for Stu-d11! Alffairs, 7-133. Good luck!

(Clockwise from Bottom): HowardBaker describes new secret weapon;former Cambridge Mayor Alfred Vel-lucci; Ted Kennedy after facelift;.President John Anderson.

Talbot House assignments have been made forthe month of April:4th-6th Preprofessional Advising Office1 1 th-1 3th MIT Corporation18th-20th Friends of Suzy Houpt Committee25th-27th Alfred Velluci High School

I

The Lecture Series Comms^?itteeand the Republican Club of MIT

are proud to present

A LECTUREby

RICHARD M. NIXONand

SPIRO T. AGNEW"Where We Went Wrong in '72"

(and '73, and especially '74)Admission Free

(Enemies List Mem bers 2 Dollars)Saturday, IMlarch 15, 1980

8pm 26-100

joke," but it was certainly notfunny to the four pedestrians whogot splattered with goat guts, orfor the poor goat's rW--*. Hackssuch as these atE neiMhO funnyand dangerous, aid are even lessacceptable wher cy. ie ot anur onthe Institute's roafktW 'domeswhich are off-liniits16 all non-authorized personnel.

West Garage StolenVassar Street's West ParkingGarage was stolen on Tuesdaywhen a worker went to lunchwithout locking the dw-r. Allemployees and persorntmareonceagatin reminded to lock all park-ing garalges and other- structuresto prevent such future occurences.Rerniemnber: Parking Garages areexpensive!

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Those Fickle New7 Ha phire-desEmma OttS

)0)0)0i1#ekQk~QQQQ

QQQQQQQQQ UNCOMITTED (Republican)

QkQQQQQQQ5 UNCOMMITTED (Independent)

QQQQQQQQQ UNCOMMITTED (Whig)

Official MIIT Notice

W -olic adddUrchins Called

DangerousYes, once again Spring is just

around the corner with its bud-ding trees, its chirping birdies,and its undauntable bicyclethieves. Th in and iden-tification otio ns by ourpatrolmen Xipfficuit, in-deed, so sf*8g~va:ed thatwith a lock It should besecured in or discouragethese pests. And remember toreport at once a theft to our of-fice.

Dome Off LimitsLast week's plunge of a baby goatfrom the Lobby 7 Dome mayhave been amusing to the youngrowdies who organized the i'

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Student (Center's Lobdell D~iningRoorni wohere it o)verlooks Kresge

Krupke said that the newylighting will help make potentialKreiae-stealers easier to spot. Liswell Lis inLake Lobdell patrons%%,tchin- Kresge less likcl! toloiter.

By Thunder TurkeyA Physical Plant worker was

arrested yesterday for attemptingto steal Kresge Auditorium.

Pancake Turner, a 13-yearemployee of Physical PlantBuilding Services, was taken intocustody by Campus Patrol of-ficers while leaving Kresge withelectrical conduit.

In a raid on his home near Har-vard Square, Catbridge policediscovered a large hoard of otherparts of Kresge, including severalpant els of the old roof, most of theconcrete thought to have beenwashed away from the west cor-ner of the roof, and the two Bauer

--U-4 projectors installed in theXresge projection booth late lastsurnmer.

'Our theory is that Turnerslowly removed the concrete fromthe west corner of the roof, know-ing that Kresge was due for re-roofing and that M.l.T. wouldclose the building for reconstruc-tion when the missing concretewas discovered," said CampusPatrol Officer Kookie Krupkeyesterday.

"Once Kresge was closed, hecarried pieces of the buildinghome with him every night," con-tinued Krupke. "Our first indica-tion that Turner was trying tosteal the building came when wesaw a picture of the renovationwork, taken by Luther Heinz, in arecent issue of Tick Tock. Thepicture clearly showed Turnerwith a piece of Kresge in hispocket."

Turner was arraigned yesterdayin Middlesex County DistrictCourt on charges of grand larcenyand edificial kidnapping, and wasordered to undergo psychiatricevaluation.

William Jennings Bryan,

District Judge, said in his order,"Although stealing a building is atruly heinous crime, anyone whowould steal ;I Bauer projectormust be suspected of mental in-colilpeten ce.'

In the meantime, M.I. I . nas In-stalled mlercury-valpor lights nearKresge find atl the south end of the

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`B' 'conduits, just before his

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arrest by Campus Patrol

By Joey RamoneUAP Jonathan Hakalot '81, in

an interview, explained he was infull agreemnent with the Chancel-lor's office's position on the re-cent tuition hike- Hakalot said

that the 17%' is completely ac-ceptable. Hakalot pointed out thatthe inflation rate in Brazil is wellover 35% and that MIT has anumber of Brazilian students."When you index the tuition rateincrease to the Brazilian studentcost of living and then average itproportionately over all MIT un-dergraduates, 17% becomes veryacceptable." Hakalot went on toexplain that "with M IT's largestudent population from Euro-pean and Latin Americancountries and given their homecountry's respective rate of infla-tion, 17% is actually quite abargain."

Hakalot then explained the re-cent curtailment of personalfreedoms represented by theComrnons decision. "With manystudents from communistcountries and old fashionedrepressive families at MIT, forcedcommons is a substantial increasein personal freedoms to many stu-dentshere." Hakalot said he feltin deed that inany students here.need the discipline" imparted bybeing forced to eat commonsfood.

Real Paid Advertisement .. Real Paid Advertisement .. Real Paid Advertisement . Real

PACIFICINTELLIGENICE %CONSCLTANTS

is looking for adventurous and talented men anid wonlenfor positions in its rapidly expanding Eastern Division.We specialize in the acquisition and interpretation ofintelligence. Possible opportunities are in the fields ofelectronic surveillance, reconnaissance, research anddevelopment and various support seivices. If you thinkthat you have the talent and experience needed to joinour team of operatives, call us at ext. 5 6138 or ext. 5-6135.

Howdy Doody lookalikeJonathon Hakalot on receiving.from Paul Gray. a scholarshipcovering any expenses he mightincur in his remaining time atMIT. (P hoto by Gordo Haf-focused. courtesy The Rech)

With many feeling that the tui-tion and commons decisionsrepresented failures on the part ofHakalot's administration,Hakalot felt obliged to point outhis accomplishments. " We havesubstantially reorganized our ac-counting system. The $50,@0reserve fund has been'reorganized' to only $25,000."

The UAP said that the other$25,000 is being amortized by theHakalot Development Board, arecently appointed Institute Corn-rnittee. As far as the apparentfailures with the administrativepolicy, Hakalot commented,"Don't worry. Nobody really ex-pected that we could really doanything. I'd hate to upset them."

Intelligence Constdtantsigeles, Calffomia

Pacif cLos An

Real Paid Advertisement ... Rsal Paid Advertisement ... Real Paid Advertisement ... Real Paid Advertisement .'. .

Z O D I A C PARTY

Real Paid Advertisement ...

THEv Z BT

By Flo ZiegfieldAi new theater entertainment

complex is now being built on thewest carnpus by the MIT LeisureServices Corporation (LSC).

l he Ilicility. with a seatingc apaciy o' over 6000,)will repre-scillt aI I11alr ilmrprovelmenl il LSC

MOvie qUa;liltV PIMlIS Currently in-ClUdc installltion of two 7011m1rn

prI., jector.s capa5;ble ol1' showing

Ultra-Pa'nanlvisicBIo, a six channelD)oNlhs SOUcldu stlemi, 30 Bosecolonel X(8)0 lzudspebakers poweredb\1 I(.)(( *,0 watts of' auilplificaltion,and prrovisioni I;mr the later instal-I;,i,0i Ol' SellS.ll l 01.lnd equiplllenlt.

The two-story complex willhave al 2000 seat ice skating rinkoin the around floor to enableLSC to book the Ice Capades, theIce Follies and the hockeyp1;n-of l0s ofthe Winter Olypics. Atthe ilid ol' each skating season,the ice surface will be chopped upanld sold to SCC for use at therevived Stratus Rtats. When askedif' Rat patrons would mind theskated-onl ice, SCC chairmanChris Wheeler-Dealer comn-

rnented, "No problem. They'll betoo soused to notice."

A recent article in The Recknoted that MIT Physical Planthad not included sufficient fire es-capes for the planned capacity inthe design. When informed of theproblem, LSC staff engineerShorty Bill sighed, "That's unfor-tunate. That means that we mightnot be able ito show as manynitrate filnis to packed houses aswe planned."

LSC treasurer Joel "Dwarfo"Berez felt the cost of the newtheater would not trigger an in-crease in movie prices "as long asour Chrysler stocks hold up."Otherwise, refreshments will justhave to sell more squid and flax.Additional revenues will begenerated by periodically rentingthe f'acility to the Athletic Depart-ment when LSC is not using it.

the grand opening for the newtheater is planned for nextl ebruary's Registration Day,when LSC will show "SnowWhite and the Seven Dwarfs-What Really Happenned.,"

rzi1

DANCING I DOOR PRIZES !nlyZ5/personTickets on sale in Lobby 10 $ 4. /c ou ple

- -- I-

THURSDAY, MARCH 13, 1980 THE FOCUS PAGE 3

Kresge pocket vetoed

.'~~~~~~~~~~~r~ A. · ·.

-The picture that started the Campus Patrol investigation of Kresge'sgradual disappearance (see story, page 3). Note the 2x4 wood beamwhich the man in the center has In his pocket and is trying to conceal.(Photo by Luther Heinz. Tick Toc!;. U'sed without permission)

17% -TDM

_MWAMM- L M

Entertainmentcomplex plansreve~aled

Live "-z (zjMusic With

SCORPIO At 8:30

In The SALA0NMAR1S

Free Beer (.w/lD) & Refreshments

Proceeds to Myasthenia Gravis Fund !

& IZ' " gT -:B-~~~~~~- -- U Rambing religious dogv wap

I

Edlitorial

Building is c ed upThe newv athletic center (to be conmpleted in 1980, I mnean 1981, 1

inean 1982. . .) is apparently going to have space for thousands of peo-p~le, fnd adequate fire exits for half that amount. This tidbit conies toinle by way ofaz prestigious newspaper on our canipus. (I dare not saywhich since their business manager would love to have nie sued forlibel.) Thes Reach (whoops) ran this no doubt important news on thefront page. It is disappointing that their fine reporters overlooked ancven miore calmpus-shattering failing of the heralded sports coniplex.

After all, the number of people the center will be able to accom-inodate is aI trivial piece of information that affects only a minisculeportion of the M IT population. So there will be limited access to sportsevents. How Inany students actually go to these jockish displaysaInyhzow So gradualting students will be permitted fewer guests at theirerem~onies. How many students actually graduate? (Spot countsamol(ung those inhabitants of the fourth floor of the Student CenterleeVall a smalll nlumlber.)

No, the capacity of the Atheletic Center is a moot point importantonly to the architects. What is truly devasting is the sheer size andp~lacernenlt of the monstrosity. Why, the damn thi'ng is going to blockthe sunset!!!

Is that laughter I hear'? Do not be derisive. This is more destructive toschool spirit than you think. No more will MITSFS nmenbers bebalthed in the glow of the setting sun, so vital to their well being, sincethe heat in the library is so finicky. The dignitaries of APO will nolonger have the perfect backdrop to their meetings. An elemlent of greatbeauty will be lost to all those who use the Student Center.

With Kresge lost to future generations, the main auditorium for MITevents is now the Sala de Puerto Rico. As the days becomne longer andthe sun sets at a later hour, hundreds of people would have beencrowded in that room observing the awe-inspiring last rays of our life-L-jiving orb. Alais, this is not to be.

But this is not the true horror that that edifice will bring. An exten-sive surveving study reveals to mne that the Center will protude justenvut'r0 past the Student Center so as to block out the rays of the settingSlln that woulld -shine down the Infinite Corridor. Yes, M IT has seen its'Ilast Sunset down the Infinite Corridor.

i-or those who do not know of this austere senliannual event, attend'-is I relate the tale. Twice a year, on days equally spaced about thewinter solstice (Sunset Days occur on the last days of Noveniber andJalnualry). the sun sets exactly on a path that allows its rays to shootstraight down the Infinite Corridor. Twice a year hundreds gather atthe far end of the.Corridor to witness the occurrence. The event hasgreat religious significance to the members of the community. Evensuch greats its Professor Emeritus Harold E. "D~oc" Edgerton take timleoul of the hectic schedules in order to attend the event.

And now the infidels in the MIT Administration want to take all ofthis away!! How dare they? Hiow dare we let the'egtaa with it? If--we 'do, this deprivation of our spiritual and aesthetic rights will only bethe start. I envision a day not too far in the future when MIT studentsfire lorced to spend their lives enclosed by steel and concrete buildings,never seeing the sun, never knowing what the grass feels like when youanid your boy/girl-triend topple onto it in the heat of spring passion...

D~on'l let this happen! We can stop themn. All it takes is some of the.spirit of1the bygone days of revolution. Compulsory commons, poorlydesigned new-dormitories and athletic complexes, all this can be stop-ped bry the proper use of force and persuasion. We will demnand that theadministration tear down the new Athletic Center -and re-erect it

ei ghlt leet closer to Central Square.

,The Focu8s!t could not care-less, about its responsibilitytoethe MIT community tobe fair and reasonable.

1. 1 1 1 | .

Dan Perished '81- Chairman of the BoardJon von Zelowitz '82 -Editor in Chief

Steve-o Mrtzky'79 -Managing EditorJloel Feeberez '75 -Business Manager

Landru '75- Executive EditorVolumne 27. Number 2

Thursday, March 13. 1980

I

The Focus (ISSN 1234-6969) is published occasionally during the academicyear by the MIT Lecture Series Committee. 84 Massachusetts Avenue, RoomW20-469 /really!/, Cambridge. MA 02139. Third Class postage unpaid atBoston, MA. Profit Orgy Permit No. 59720. POSTMASTER: Please send allsocially adept studs under 5'2" interested in joining Execomm to our mailingaddress- The Focus!, PO Box 7. MIT Branch, Cambridge, MA 02139.Telephone: (617) 253-3791. Advertising, subscription, and typesetting-ratesavailable. 1980 The Focus!. Printed by Charles River Publishing, Inc.

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vIn light of the fact that thispublication is traditionally thesound ing board for the partiallyaware, and therefore prints thingsthat no rag would dare touch, Icrank forth this missive with somehopes and many doubts that itwill be printed.

I continually read letters inyour sister rag The Rech fromsome really incredible flaming,Milintaristi'c-fe-ebI'e, schin'tik6right-wi-ng hawks with suicidaltendencies, begorange! Well, asthe one duly annointed and of-ficial, even, representative ofVeterinary Disciplism on campus,I will avail myself of this oppor-tunity to enlighten you with thedivine or at least mildly ip-teresting words spoken by thefirst prophet Alphonzo Bedoyaand attributed to either the godMurray or a particularly good lotof mushrooms.

Alphonzo recently said to me,and I quote,"Twas of a Knight,late, lang time agonle, ine that auld

stadle Eld wherein dour Stoolybeginnes." Alphonzo is a greatman, who in every word leavesreams of meaning. This crypticstatement clearly outlines Mur-ray's attitude towards the draft. Atrue veterinary disciplist wouldnever allow himself to be takenalive. Besides, the military as -arule refuses to provide Mazolaand Nymphets, two of the mostcritical ingredients for a succes-sful Crossover celebration.

Continuing, and after a shortinterval of unintelligible mumnbl-ing, Alphonzo said, "Thenhooligan Hornigan wasruernorgued to have been seengathering his Masteries andshrifting through his dustardDeeds in a most peculia r fashion.And with that druided -Snarecreeping over his Visigoth atwitch in later tombs people wereheard to have forgrifted theirMummers and dyed on the spot,be brudely Rapt in a twice nicely.fadshun."

I mean, you gotta admit that

not even Lennon can get intopropheting that heavy, you know?More psilocybin. So that showsthat M urray is opposed tomilitary action of any kind,anywhere but New Jersey. Oh,Fuck! I've lost my razor blade. Sothis just goes to show that, youknow, the hawks are just like piss~-ing uip a rope, right? I'd betterclose this 'ere I loose it.

Anyhloo, Alphon'zo, closed bysaying, "And laying that secondFinger aside his nose and givingher Nod, Murray pilately washedhis hands of the whole affair. AndCypilly speaking, It was probablya Blessing." Like, can you getbehi-nd that, man? Oh wow. Backto ~the,--ixfies!

With Murray, you have noneed for clothes!

SJ. Faz-ak G

The Focus!Editril PoAy

Flames ;|zv the Child w.v-lina' (11' iluna{tics and alleLI~S;LKil! I (u11.1d Al oeive All1 cs(1.. Opinions a e \% i i t ei by prceole genel'ly|1! *on1-nlectetAd \\-[II TheR 1 o CR. MildO~CC3siOM11h ContaI~in ilucid

rnzuk}.ll1s. [Letters me l ic g|<-

Atientl hci-\ ilclI-C~lISMo l e~ll I a~lullili'lts.

\%1lXc1l ;,mo,.st newlU ;11ppea.

it) TheR [1.,1A..

To the Edfitor:Well folks, again the adminlistra-

tion hasq released one of -its biasedreports on sexual activity oncampus. Speaking for the Com-mnittee for .$ocial Betterment, Iwould like to put in our two centsfor the male of the species. Asusual, we demand equal time.

IHlw can the Institute claim thatthere is harassment on this cam-pus'? I've never been harassed inall my years here. In fact, I'mpretty dawned bored. I sit in myroom evelry night in McGregor Fentry. I keep hoping that someonewill comne harass nie'! I'm going to

graduate with simultaneousdegrees in 6, 8, 18, 22 and 16 afteronly three years! - Why don't I get harassed, orgroped even? I mean, I'm perectlyqualified for it! I'm male, have a5.0, I finally licked my acne, l1changed my eyeglass frames! Whywon't women harass me? Comeon! Just a roaming hand or anudge if that's all you can spare!Please! I mean all of us on thecommitee are tired of each other.HELP!

Head HunierCommnittee for

Social Betterment

Foreign Editor: Steve Rhuel '73Photo Editor: Kevin Oddlyborn '82Ricky Re-write, Boy Reporter: Erki ShermanDrums: Scotty Griffith '81Keyboards: Julie 3ozacz3a '79Sound: Shorty Bee '73Non-contributing Editor (hallelujah !): GordoI

i'797

Hiaffwit '79Mun~chkins: Crunchy Biddle '82, Linaus Viscous '82Reproductions: Billy D. Goat 'ODTall Munchkin: Lucrezia Lindemere Linde '82Contributing Editors: Dornstein Icon '75, Head HuniStephanos Berzadopolous '80, Mike Ssivat '81Refreshments (slurp)'. Rocket J. Cardliasco '01Thief: Marcus Blancus '75Contributing Mysterious Presence: The Body '75contentment)Dead: Francisco Franco '31

nter '79,

To the Editor:I am writing to- express my

amazement at the recent plethoraof flaming about FinBoard's$50,000 reserve fund. I will ignorethe fact that this fund was'specifically set up to be kept forlong term projects and emergen-cies; that everyone even remotelyconnected with FinBoard knew ofthe fund's existence and purpose;that The Rech had nothing else forits front page on several occa-sions.

But what's all the fuss about?Don't people have any idea howmuch other campus organizationshave stashed away? For example,SCC has $210,000 in quartersgenerated by their pinballmachines stored in3 vaults deepbelow the Student Center, thevaluse of the silver in LSC's filmcollection is estimated at well over$400,000, The Review holds$90,000 in Chrysler 30-yeardebentures (though their marketvalue is open to question), and the

Chinese Student Club hoards inexcess of 12,000 tons of rice.

When I approached UA Presi-dent Jonathan Hahaha to askabout his -opinion on theseholdings, hee responded, "Ofcourse I known of those assets forseveral years. I'm in the process ofsetting up meetings with. . . HO WMANY TONS OF RICE???'"

Siephano0s Ber adqpulov-_'1q

(peace,

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_~ PAGE 4 THE FOCUS THURSDAY, MARCH 13, 1980

Nurd wvants woma~n

i Lettr witn -ya oo

( rP~L' I~ 1 g Ln I CL- L I_- _I-_d -- II _

Congressmen made ·assholes of - In the most recent FBI stingoperation, several U:S Congres'smen were accused of spitting on subwaypItlailrfoi.. A Georgetown ·mansion,-was fitted to look like a subwaystop on the neW Washington- subway system. Videotapes were made asthe: congressineni thinking themselves to be on the first leg of tinoverseas fact-finding junkets were induced to spit by FBI agents dis-guised-as ticket maiachines.

Nu'dear HavocBomb test. confirmed - State department -officials have todayrevealed -thalt the unidentified nuclear explosion 6teaeSouth Africa last1,111 was an- atomic device lest by the Massachusetts Institute ofTechnology. ' This confirms long-time rumors of MIT's nuclear -weapons development program-. MIT becomes the seventh memlber of

the nuclear crub,joining the US, the USSR; India, China, Britain, andLichtenstein. When told about the development of the atomic weapon,M IT president Jerome Weisner is reported to have said, "Wow! Neat!"

Nuclear advances - President Carter has approved funds for thecontroversial MX Arlly Camp System. This program would build Fiftyarrny carnps- on a huge reservation in Nevada. The camps would beconnected by. underground tunnels, and all the army camp personnelwould periodically run from one camp to another. Thus, the Sovietswould never be sure which of the fifty camps to nuke blue.

NIX Missiles for Massachusetts - Some changes to the MX missileprogram have been recently approved. In order to minimize expenses,railroad track already in place will be used to shuttle the missiles un-

derground from stop to stop. Massachusetts Governor Ed King has an-nounced that the MBTA subway system will house two MX nlissiles."In addition to keeping the metropolitan Boston area safe from Conl-rie attack," said King, "the MBTA deficit will be greatly relieved,since each time a missile is moved, the US Army will be charged 25cents."

NationalFeeble candidate fights back - Republican presidential contenderRonald Raygun today called a press conference to refute claims niadein a recent The Rech article that he was too old and feeble to serve aspresident. While tap dancing across the stage, Raygun remindednTern bers of the press of the leadership qualities he showed in his role inKhind s Rowlt. Raygun noted that his experience working with- a- monkeyin Bedlimnefisr Bonzo qualified him to deal with Congress. He then wenton to tell his vast repertoire of ethnic jokes on Italians, Australians,Texans, Ducks, Iguanas, and citrus fruits.

Weather oWarm and pleasant today, with a chance of rain tonight. Chknging to

snow by midnight and then to huge red hot rocks plunging from thesky, mutilating innocent women and children, ripping their limbs off,and disemboweling helpless widows, orphans, and cripples. Tides twoto three hundred feet above normal, with some flooding of low Iyingcoastal areas expected. Clearing towards mornings with temperaturesrising towards 300 degrees Celsius by noon. As the oceans boil away,uncovering secret UFO bases hidden within the Bermuda triangle, bil--ions of test tube babies looking like Farrah Fawcett Majors will dropfromn the sky, and will take over all the capitals of the world. As thesand lizards from Alpha-Orionis IV begin the counter-attack SundayI lorni ng, most of the Earth's surface will be reduced to M fused lump ofradioactive silica.' By Monday, skies should clear, with seasonabletemi peratures.

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cluding UAVP Chuck Markhamand SCC Chairman ChrisWheeler have been detained for..questioning" by the CampusPatrol.

The abolition of studentgovernment was also announcedin the seven hour address. Hakalafelt that there was no need for thiswith "a substantially responsiveand responsible" person in thePresident's office.

Dean Robert Holden has Of-fered his services as UAP if stu-dent government is ever re-established.

The faculty gave a differentreason for resigning. They are

angry hi th the ;ir iilimst ration Fornot receivin news of' major deci-siOlns bel'ore student publications.

Vacated 'l'CIIIy po)sitions willbe Filled bv Phvsicail PlanrtcnplI(oyces.

Gray is mIaking himself;lvalilable rts it dralf candidate forthe 19380 Republic;ll Presidentialn() ination. "A\fter ;1ll this time, Idon't want to colimpletely give upthe chance of ai Presidential posi-Lion, no rnlltter where it is," heSlid.

Gray feels that he can "screwpeople as well as anyone in

Ct(veernment."

By Steven SolenoidThe entire administration will

leave MIT on June i, ex-Presidentelect Paul Gray will announcetornorrow in a meeting with theCorporation. In a seperate action,the faculty is also expected toresign.

Student leaders will substitutefor the administration until a newone can be assembled. UAPJonathon Hakala '8I will replaceGray as-President-elect and eachGA member will become a Vice-President.

Due to the light nature of thework and lack of experiencenecessary, it is not anticipatedthat the new administration willexperience any insurmountabledifficulties,

The prevailing reason for' theresignations was a need for al'change of pace."'

"I've been here for practicallymvy whole life, for Christ's sake! Imnay have been President-elect foronly a few months, but I've beenaround for more years than moststudents have been alive, and IJ'msick and tired of the place. I'vedone my best to drive the littlebuggers [students] out, but I guessI failed, and it's either them orme," explained Gray.

In a major policy addressWednesday to a group of threecomnatose students,- Hakala an-nounced a tuition hike in additionto the one apprOved by Gray.

"I have determined that thistuition hike will offset a potential-ly larger one that looms in ourfuture. I would like to take timeto point out that this apparentlysubstantial increase of $400 is ex-Lacti- the urnour,nt #%thatL Iliadprormised we would hold the ;ad-rninistration to," said Hakala.

Hakala refused to comment onwhy many campus leaders, ins

Soviets pushy-The-Soviet push in the Middle East continues asIrI-i t ljd Indiafll.11un1derjthe tread.of the advancing Red Arnly. Presi-dent JihlrayyCarter called a Ipress conference to an-nounce the additionof newv. iteilns to,the list of vital foodstuffs enibargoed to the SovietUnion. Added to the list were'such items~ as'Count.Chocula cereal.I'lepsi-Ccola, -and, Ring -Dings.

Paul Gray eagerly awaiting the luncheon for the Corporation cateredby Dining Service.

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All applicants must not drink, smoke, crr usemnnd-altering drugs. Applicants must refrainfrom the use of foul language.Only virgins need apply.,

i,.II

F11I

THURSDAY, MARCH 13. 1980 THE FOCUS PAGE 5 _

Adios folks, it's been real

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at LSC

there's more to the showthan just the movie.

Everything you wanted for only 75 cents

JL-,,,-~~~~~~~~~~X. 4~?"~;~

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Rone Miller lecture on "Energy-rmSpac

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By Stevie DwarfskiProfessor Kene Miller, a

NASAZ consultant on the develop-inent of' the space shuttle andori nler head of M.l.T.'s Aero andAistro depalrtmnent, will give a freeleeture oil 'Ineroy from Space"Tues., Malrch 18 ait Spm in 10-250.

Slides aind L film simulation of.r)tece constructioil will be shown.

Much of the lecture will bebased on UROP research con-ducted tit Senior House. "CosmicHleads," the name of the studentresealrch group, hopes to erect theworld's largest marquee in ageosynchronous orbit overBoston. Powered by solar cells,the marquee will operate in thenight sky to be visible from theground.

The first message planned is''Do drugS to live. Live to do

drugs." Advertising space willeventually be available at a priceto help offset the cost of theoperation. I

Babcock and Wilcox, the com-pany that built the reactor atThree Mile Island, and HughesAircraft are rumored to be offer-ing six digit sums for advertisingspalce.

In case of solar cell failure, the"Heads" have a backup systemplanned, consisting of a largernetal cage containing 3,473,819gerbils powering a generator.

Finding space suits to fit theanirnals is expected to be difficult.Original experiments on thisrnethod resulted in failure whenthe gerbils exploded when ex-posed to the vacuum.

Space shuttle placing marquee into orbit.

* _m MoF m mm* moo _F* =No- =O 0=0 lO ==l

mitory like East Campus," ex-plained Ms. Nevillson.

Nor R Magnusson, EastCarnpus house manager, ap-plauded the memo. "Now we canget even with them for the GreenBuilding!" he exclaimed.

East Campus residents hadmixed responses ranging from un-printable to disappointed. "Whatwill we do on weekends withoutTransparent Horizons' to hack?"asked one student.

Nevillson responded to this at-titude by saying, "Studentsshould interact with their en-vironrent. Who knows, theymight improve it!"

Plans for "TransparentHorizons"; are still unclear. Bex-ley still is on record as wanting it,citing the need for it during R/Qweek. Alternatively, it may beconverted into a thermitepowered torch for the Olympicsto be held in Boston.

By Francis Ford Crappola"Transparent Horizons," the

sheet metal sculpture installedseveral years ago between theEast Campus parallels, will haveto be removed within two weeksaccording to Vice-President Con-stantine Simonides.

The artist, Louise Nevillson,has refused to sign a "memo ofliability"' covering the damage toEast Carpus and the psyches ofthe students living there.

The rnerno, which Nevillsoncalled "ridiculous," makes theChernical Engineering depart-nient and her liable for alldarnages caused by the sculpture.

'It's really grotesque, I know. Irnade it that way to show M.l.T.wheat is happening to its students.Sorne poor innocent pieces ofmetals bent and warped under in-tense heat and pressure, sym-bolize the poor M.A.T. tool. It isespecially appropriate for a dor-

nationwide speech, Zit calls for anend to the needless slaughter ofcelery and is quickly sent away toa home for peop'le who say thingslike that. Finally, with a modicumof sanity restored, Burton andTaylor return to their home inCambridge, where Burton meetsMcCormick and Baker and theysettle down to become a row ofWest Campus dormitories.

Happiness eludes Baker,however, and he decides to runfor President of the United States,but is handily defeated by JohnAnderson. In a moving scene, hetells fornter Cambridge MayorAlfred Vellucci that "my life hasbecome a jar of mayonaise."Critics and audiences still argueover the meaning of those famousand enigmatic last words.

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Artist Louise Nevillson, whose sculpture "Transparent Horizons," sub-titled "A Self-portrait in Iron. must be moved within 2 weeks.

his talents but lost his secretRoger Ramjet decoder ring.

The Great Train Robbery hasbeen so well received by thepublic that other robbery moviesare being planned. The soon to bereleased Airport '80: The GreatPlane Robbery will star BruceDern, Victor Spinetti, and formerMayor Alfred Vellucci. Othersinclude The Great Tricycle Rob-bery, The Great No. I Harvard-Dludlev Bus Robbery, and TheGreat Inter-Continental Trans-Atlantic Monorail Robbery(directed by Irwin Allen).

(c0Jnlinel7{ jromn page I )in the crucial third reel. Doctors

were forced to do an emergencyscenectomy, tragically removingthe scene where Gable andMonroe help Connery andSutherland remove the gold bul-lion 1rorn the train. However, thisis soon forgotten as the very nextscene is the incredibly powerfulone where Connery realizes hehas won the loot but lost his in-nocence; he has done the impossi-ble but lost his pride and in-tegrity: he has reached the peak of

forl / Have you ever wondered what goesinto an LSC poster? Well, it allbegins in the darkroom with properdark room- techniques. First we userubber cement to make a nice stickypaste-up. Then we flash the film and

I impregnate it with developer to getail the parts welldevldoped, and fix-er so that it can be exposed in broaddaylight. You must m-ake sure you

':-''' have the right point suzes Negs arescantily clad with masking sheets onone side and nothing (Oooh!) on theother. The next step of our process ismounting the plate with the diddlestick, and then passing over theblanket and between the rollers.When a white spot appears on theplate, it's time to put your Tusche onthe plate. And for a final clean-up. ..

roto

A PoemI're a goose and harden in the countryAn acme I call ny ploneA treat I can replace toWhlen I heed to nee aloneCatterfiv and butterpillarPerch on hbeqft loughA iid I listen to the dats and cogsA.s theva1 mpark and they beowYe~s, mature here is nunderfulThere is Ilo iveed for nurdsWh11ile .willisng hv ml ivindullu1: fltterBim, 1 little turds.

-Traditionalz

Putz oni the rollers.

PREIO

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MM PAGE 6 THE FOCUS THURSDAY, MARCH 13. 1980

Lost horizons _ _

StillTa e(conlii~zed Iroun padge 1 }

Robbery Continues

PROFITEERCOME and LOOK UP our ridiculously "reduced" rates and our famous fine"friendly" service, and maybe well be able to SQUEEZE you into our TIGHTwork schedule. So SLIDE onl DOWN tomorrow! You have nothing to lose+%eepf

If you can't pay now, ask about our free lay-away plan. You won't lost our interest(rates) but you might lose the shirt off your back (and more!) Remember, if wescrew up, YOU PAY!

II · r~ l -II l

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-- ------ sill =b-

scenter so that stu-

ng hammocks.to pay for the dor-rovements, student: increased 100 per-Xive to September,ier felt that this in-not unreasonable,,s will be able to takef the improvementsthe 12 foot barbed

guard stations, andThese changes willrecreational advan-

ill cut the -flow ofigh the dormitories,

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I

MARC~·;M~g), 943Q-T EF0CUSF.-PAGE.7 _:

Olympics take Arrim·-X~~iii~jiethro MhN. Rhuel These spaces are obvious new athletic

*At seidents Jiying in dor- choices, noted Braammer, since dents can stirrnit-ories will be requested to they are not fully utilized at this In order t(vacate their rooms by April. 15 to time and are conveniently close to rnitory imprprovide housingfoAd the, alternate :: camqpus. Anid, he eontinued, must ' ents will be1980 Summer Olymipic'Gaaes to · students would not noticetfi dip cent,- retroacbe held in Boston, announced ference between their current 1979. BrammMIT director of student housing . rooms and the new accomoda- crease wasH. E. Brammeryest'eday.! , . .tions. -. since students

Students unable to firdi&;,off r Studentslji-Vinginresge will advantage ofcampus housingYill-be p0laced in. be assigned- two adjacent :Eeats, next fall, likeKresge auditoriumr, n'ow.-unused one in:"ich- to'sleOp and one in wire fences,due to roof rep~air, aid i:ne the new - ; which to study. Sinceno food is --spotlights." Iindoor athletic fiktility, which swill allowed in the aulditoium, all stun have definitebeenclosed in polyethlfyknesheets dents wil.,.be.placed on corn tagas and wiuntil the walls ar, c6inpleted early ¢. 'pusory commons in Lobdell. urchins throuin the summer. - ks will b said Brammer

.~~~~~~~~' .ook _ilb~sp~idi h

Baker House, a future home for Olympic Athletes

The Demtlocratic National Comm1Ze11ittee

antd the M8.l.T. Science Fiction Socien,

proudl· prreoe1 t concert byLINDA RONSTADTsinging on behalf of

GOVERNOR JERRY BROWNCandidate for the Presidency of

the United States, Spacecraft EarthAdmission Free

Saturday, March 15, 19808pm 26- 100

The Boston Syniphony will: beperforming Moizart's 'YellocwSubmarine" in tht.,H ardwareDepartrent of t6M Harvar,,d Coopin about, twelve,",m ninutes froln,now. Tickets caid:be obtained bysending a self-addresstd, stampedhedgehog to Libyan PresidentMuarnmar Qaddafl.

A special presentation of HansPhilbert's classic mime ballet,"Two Sisters and ai Corn Muf-fin"', will be performed by thePhilbert Mime Ballet. The perfor-mance can be seen this Wednes-day in the Great Court, but onlyif you bring really- goodbinoculars as the ballet companywill begin Braintree.

An exhibit of Matchstick Art by'sculptor Felix "Two-Sheds"-Borschtsky will- be held inBoston's Public Garden thisweekend. The exhibit includesmatchsticks of-every conceivalblesize and color, as well asBorschtsky's 'Monla Matchstick.'

This Saturday's Midnight Movie,"The Texas Chainsaw Massacre",

^ has-been cancelled, due to the film: accidentally being delivered to the

LSC Office and subsequentlyvanishing mysteriously.

The department of Food andNutrition is offering a series oflectures this weekend on "OurFriend The Rutabaga". For timesand locations call DepartmentHeadquarters and speak to MissAnne Rutabaga.

There will be a rally supporting thedraft to be held Sat., March 18 atPier 6. Participants will be in-ducted immediately and sent offto the country of-their choice.

Classes in Punk culture includinghow to pierce cheeks, dance like amnaniac, and really learn to loveJoey Rarnone will be held Thurs-day nights. Call 494-8314.

Shy, lonely MIT President wants tomeet voluptuous female for last flingbefore retirement. Please call 253-1000and ask for Jerome.

Parking Garage for sale. Slightly usedbut good condition. May need minorfoundation work and some painting. CallLen at x3-1541.

I will do any sort of menial labor forminimum wages, especially if it isdemeaning and filthy. However, I will notwork near any labs where DNA researchis going on. I don't want MY childrenhaving 8 legs and three eyes. CallCambridge Citq Hall and ask for Alfred.

FOR SALE: One delegate to theRepublican National Convention. Goingcheap at five million dollars (less thanone-half of cost!) Please contact ConnallyCampaign Headquarters if interested.

Peace. Contentment. Raise ClassicsPrices. Vote for Anderson. InvoicePublicity Supples. Hot 'Chocolate at4arn Watch Python--Films. A ButternutDonut and a Cup of Cider Please. Readbusiness Week. To be absorbed call x3-3791 and ask for Landru.

Anywhere you sit, -a BLOSE reflect/directing loudspeakersurrounds you with sound. From the left. From the right. frombehind you. From under the carpet.Conventional loudspeakers beam the sound in one or twodirections. Result - piercing piccoloes, boring bassoons, dul-lard drums.

The nine or so precisely placed carefully constructed drivers ineach BLOSE loudspeaker radiate sound in all directions. Andfill the room with sound.

Nlo matter where you sit or stand, you hear accurate stereobalance. Every note is reproduced with clarity and precision.From the shrillest shriek of the lead vocalist to the deepestthump of the drum.Sound reflects off walls, ceilings, floors, end tables, and piles ofdirty laundry for a virtual cacophony of reflected sound sm-eared throughout the room. Result? Proper balance ofreflected and direct sound, just like at a live performance.Ever notice how at Symphony Hall, all the musicians playtowards the back of the stage with their backs towards theaudience? The BLOSE loudspeaker accomplishes the sameresult. You won't be able to tell if Mr. Ozawa is conducting inyour living room or in Park Street Under.

BLOSE makes two models of loudspeakers for home use. TheBLOSE Dead Goats model is a modestly priced bookshelf

system for small rooms. The top-of-the-line BLOSE Ed Kingmodel. shown below, was the result of a decade of acousticresearch at MIT. It sets a new standard for open, spacious,lifelike reproduction that characterizes the world's most highlyreviewed loudspeaker.BLOSE loudspeakers. They fill your listening space withreflected sound, just like in the shower room at DuPont gyrn-nasium.

BLOSE. Surround yourself with sound

Girls: you've tried the rest, now trythebest Rated four stars in a recent new-spaper poll. I'm available if you are. Call"Big" Jon von at x3-3791 or drop by anynight near Kenmore Sq.

Fetishists: I'm looking for someone tohave good times with. You are cuddlywench with rubber sheets. Mazola. an-d or bales of flax. I have squid - willtravel Call Gordon at Father's Fore anynight

Wanted: Classics director to replacesenile. Incompetent Blank. Must beyoung (-20) and not given to outburstsof twittery. Must own more than one pairof pants x3-3791

Open letter:Dear Siophmore Ihose bag) women,

How dare you steal our sons from us.Must you rob the cradle to get what youWdllt ?

The Freshmen Mothers.

Last chance: after months of waiting,we're aboout to give up If you're red-headed arin lonely, leave we got a matchfor you Viryins get first pick. Call Cap'neddy or Unkle Erki at x3-3791.

ANYWHERE YOU SIT,YOU'RE SURROUNDED BY SOUND

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at. OFr!NAThe Mole Hill, Framirighanm, Mass. 01701

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There are four differentleagues. D league allows only un-armed combatants. C, B. and Aleagues, respectively, allowbroken bottles, knives and chains,aind zip guns,

The only difficulty facing theinstitution of the sport has beenthe difficulty in finding-insuranceunderwriters for new sports atMIT since the $2,300,000 in-surwnce clarim rnade during lastf,-Il's Freshman Green BuildingJuinp [The Fo(cus, Vol. 27Number 1].

the problems of the inner cityyouth," said Holden, "Further-mnore, I welcome a unique oppor-lunity to involve the Cambridgecoimimunity in activities at MIT."

Intralmural Chairman PeterLelniming '69 praised an interestin 'al healthy niind and a healthybody,'" shown by these students.

in street fighting, two opposingteams Ineet in a large vacant lot,in this case Briggs Field. At therelferee's signal, the teams begin totight. At the end of the timeperiod, the lealni with the greaternumiher ol' Imemnbers left isdeclaired the winner.

By Gordo Haffaware/\ new intraiinural sport will be

aceed next year when IM streetfighting col:7 petitions begin in Oc-toher.

This sport is being added since;anv of MIT's inner city students

halve coirmplatined that the presentrange of' sports offered is dis-

ri III i na to rv s i n ce theirhbackrounds einphasized survivaltechniques over "hopscotch andilacks."

I)e;n Robert Holden is the ad-ministrrltion Imemiber that hasprovided the Imalin support for thene\s activity. "I c;ln fully relate to MIT team trying to gnurdstuff for two points in last- night's game

(Photo by short stuff courtesyThe Rech)

stitutes an MIT approved -nerdfor the usual NCAA approvedbasketball. Nurds were chosenbecause of their unique ability todribble all by themselves.

When asked how he liked thenew version' f the game, starplayer Tilty Tallest commented,"Well, I think that gnurd basketsshould-be worth more than twopoints since it takes at least threeplayers to stuff one." Anotherplayer enjoined, "I love it! Itmoves incredibly quickly since thenurd keeps getting up and run-ning awav.-

By Captain CrunchSince the recent report that the

vinyl used to cover basketballs ishazardous to the health of activeplayers, the stands all over thecountry have been filled tooverflowing with screaming deathcrazed crowds. However, at MIT,where such passionate activitywould be considered ungnurdly,they have kept the crowds belowthe limited capacity of the Cage'sbleachers.

Two M IT Students, DaveMcKnurd and Sue Tuleson, cameup with a new way to playBasketgnurd. Basketgnurd sub-

.1I

I i Workmen deliver new sound equipment for 26-100 last summer.

ly treated and new upholsteredseats will be installed.

These changes and the need toexpand the projection booth toaccomodate the new equipmentwill reduce the seating capacity in26-100 to approximately 150seats. As a result, LSC will beforced to increase admission tofive dollars for all films in 26-100.In addition, the physics depart-ment will be forced to scheduleten lecture sections for 8.01.

LSC spokesperson MichaelDornbrook '75 expressed LSC'sthanks to the physics departmentfor their cooperation with theserenovations. Dornbrook statedthat the projected completiondate is now June, 1993.

separation on the three frontchannels.

Later phases include the instal-lation of projectors for Cinerama,Imax, VistaVision, Super 8, andGAF Viewmaster reels. Soundsystems for Fantasound, Perspec-taSound, and Vitaphone will beadded.

The final phase calls for the in-stallation of a huge theatre pipeorgan for LSC's annual silentrovie. However, this modifica-tion will require closing 26-100for a semester so that the Physicspreparation room can bedemolished and replaced withranks of organ pipes. At the sametire, the room will be acoustical-.

By R. M. JethroLSC today announced the near

cornpletion of the new 26-100sound system. The third phase ofthe project, the completion of thebooth monitoring facility andimprovements to the Dolby stereocinetma processor, are now com-pleted.

The first two phases of therenovation, installation of theDolbv stereo cinema processoraInd the Bose amplifiers andspeakers, were completed duringthe surrner of 1979. In the fall, aKintek cinema processor for16rnrn films was added. The re-cent improvements to the Dolbyprocessor improved stereo

LSC projection director Ed Hunter prepares new 26-100 soundsystem for Friday's showing of The Great Train Robbery with Dolbystereo sound.

The Lecture Seriev Comm1Erittee- and the Republican Club of MIT

are proud to present

A SPECIAL SHOWINGof

BEDTIME FO'R BON\IZO

RONALD R-EAGANCandidate for.the President

of the United StatesSpecial Short SubjectThe Pilot Episode of

DEATH VALLEY DAYSAdmission Free

Saturday, March 15,8pm 26-1 00

1980

_ I ' PAGE 8 THE FOCUS THURSDAY, MARCH 13, 1980

Sport rumbles on campus

Basketbal 4.0

26-100 renovations(cont.)4

VVhy is thisman smiling?

You would be too if you worked forThe Focus! Drop by one semester andplay with our equipment. You'll be anold pro in no time. Or, if you like towrite, we'llshow you how to deal with"all the news that's fit to fabricate."

The Focus!'M/e don't care. We don't have to

were irresponsible!