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Of Tents and Kings

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Leader’s Guide

07Old TestamentTHEME

Old TesTamenT 7 — 1

Objective To help groups understand how God’s covenant continued as Israel established a nation, and to lead them to experience God’s grace in calling them as a covenant people.

“Be strong and courageous; do not be frightened or dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” – Joshua 1:9

FOCUS THIS WEEKWhen called, Samuel was willing to listen and, thus, became the catalyst for a new era. Later, when the people wanted a king, Samuel (and God) suggested otherwise. The people made their demands, got what they wanted and paid the price. Ask your groups a Question: Are they willing to listen to the warning voice of God and say “thy will, not my will be done?” Years later, God was faithful to David for the sake of the promise, not because there was something special about him or his descen-dants. That promise became the means by which the ultimate blessing came to the nations: Jesus, son of David. Don’t let anyone leave without being confronted by the main point: God wants to speak to me. God wants to protect me from things that would harm me. God wants to use me, in spite of my sin, to bless the world.

USING THIS THEMEThe sections provided in this theme are designed to optimize both your planning and the brain-based learning structure of Head to the Heart (H2H). They follow the same basic format as our companion PowerPoint presentations. Whether your planning involves this document or the PowerPoint presentation files (or both), this and every H2H theme includes:

n Opening: Set the stage for a welcoming and fun event with songs, movement, and energetic learning games to preview the theme.

n Presentation: Begin the teaching time with your choice of resourc-es in the four sections provided: Life Line, Images & Analogies, Bible Time and Creative Interruptions. Remember: we give you much more than you could possibly use, so pick and choose what you think will work most effectively in your setting.

n Small Group Time: Model FAITH5 (share, read, talk, pray, bless), care for one another and process the presentation themes.

n Closing: Review the theme once again, enter your imagination with the prayer journey, pray for group and individual highs and lows, and close with a quiet blessing.

n Creative Interruptions: Enrich the theme and experience with these supplemental teaching extras: skits, music, a QuizBowl and various other options. Include a group of high school youth, a Crazy Parents Committee (CPC), or a Cross+Gen team up front to put these fun theme enhancements together.

Copyright © Faith Inkubators. For use by “Head to the Heart” members only, and only during the 2019-2020 school year. Any other use of this material is prohibited. www.faithink.com

Of Tents and Kings


2 — Of TenTs & Kings

I. OPENINGThe opening sets the mood for the entire session, saying, “Something great is going to happen.” Use this time to welcome your small groups and introduce the Theme in a fun and memorable way. Be excited! Have fun!

A. Gathering MusicThe Master Musician or Music Team kicks the event off with energy. Five to fifteen minutes before gathering time, set the mood of joy and vitality with two or three upbeat, singable, familiar camp/church songs relating to the theme. Project lyrics overhead so all hands are free to clap.

B. Welcome & IntroductionsAt the stroke of the hour, the Master Musician or MC stages a countdown “10, 9, 8, 7…” and begins the event (think “event” not “class”). Thank everyone in advance for their attention, make key announcements, and welcome spe-cial visitors. If you are celebrating a Servant Event of the Week, highlight the accomplishments of the small group and award a gag prize or traveling tro-phy. Invite this group to share what they gave and what they received.

C. QuizBowlInvite individuals or representatives from small groups up for a quick pre-view of the theme using the FINKmania PowerPoint slides or the questions provided. Idea: Let your senior high youth or Crazy Parent Committee (CPC) take ownership in this.

D. Theme IntroductionIntroduce the theme “Of Tents and Kings” with the PowerPoint slides provided. A version of the theme song is embedded into the slide to help you build the mood.

E. Opening PrayerNo relaxed mood for the opening prayer this session! Whip the crowd into a lively litany. Instruct half of the groups to join hands and repeat the prayer of King David, “Create in me a clean heart, Oh God,” in a whisper. Practice this a few times. Instruct the other half to lock elbows and cheer: “We want a king! We want a king!” Practice this together. Read the following prayer as a litany, pointing to one group to do their line following the first sentence and the other following the second sentence. Then narrate this litany by Rev. Herb Brokering, pointing to a group after each “†” for their response: “Dear God, there are kingdoms all around us with great armies and castles. † We want a king so we can have the king’s power, so we can conquer and win battles. † We want a king to give us fame and status, to bring spoils to us and secure our future. † We want a king to defend us from poverty and give us a safe income. † We want a king whose emblem will be on our clothing and vehicles, and whose warranty will make us sure. † Oh, God, we want a king to give us action, make us number one, put us on top, give us the best. † Oh God, we want a king and you send us a king who herds sheep, kneels in repentance, weeps over a lost son. † Sings prayers with a harp, dances the liturgy and gives us Psalm 23. † Oh God, yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory. † We want a king who sings, who dances and chants: Create in me a clean heart, oh God.” †

F. Theme SongIntroduce the theme song “Be Strong” embedded in the PowerPoint slides. (This song is also available via iTunes® or Amazon.com search: Old Testa-

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ment: Make Me to Know.) Practice this song in Huddle with all Guides, senior high youth and leadership team members so you can sing with energy. Create dance, actions or a modified American Sign Language to use with the chorus.

II. THEME PRESENTATION You’ve welcomed your groups and previewed the topic. Now it’s time to present the most engaging presentation you can mus-ter. Use the provided Life Line, Images & Analogies, Bible Time, and Creative Interruptions to add punch and dimension. Lecture alone hits only 5% of the capacity of the brain—be visual! “Quick-Pick” Suggestions: In a time crunch this week? Our favorite teach-ing suggestions for this lesson are highlighted with a †. If preparation time is tight, look at these pieces first. They should do the trick for a 20-30 minute presentation.

A. Life Line Story †Begin with a story from your own life when you wanted something that you knew wasn’t good for you. How did you feel? Did you find a way to get it? What were the results? Were there any consequences or “I told you so’s?” Would you do anything differently if you had it to do over again? What part did grace play in the outcome? Consider inviting a special visitor to share his or her story on this theme.

B. Creative Interruption: Skit † Invite your Theme Team, senior high, Crazy Parents Committee (CPC) or a small group to introduce the theme with your choice of the skits provided.

C. Images & Analogies Choose from two or three of the following to get your point across. (You won’t have time for many more than this!) Remember to stop for a Creative Interruption at least once (skit, song, activity, etc.) Idea: Take a look at the questions on the FAITH5 Small Group Time handout to make sure you cover them during your presentation.

1. arT aTTacK: † Refer everyone to the cover art by artist He Qi (pronounced heh-chee) located on their FAITH5 Small Group Time handout and included on the PowerPoint slides. Invite groups to study the art for a moment, then ask volunteers to describe what they see. Where do they find themselves in the art? How do the image and the verse of the week apply to their lives today?

2. salvaTiOn hisTOry Time line: (See Theme #1 Leader’s Guide for full timeline explanation. Find digital files of the timeline cartoons in your “Intro and Extras” folder.) If you are using this visual, label 1400-1100 B.C. “Conquest of the Prom-ised Land” and 1150-930 B.C. “United Kingdom.” Enlarge, paint and place Cartoon VII (above, right) at 1010 B.C. You may wish to create additional cartoons for these characters, placing them as indicated: Joshua on 1400, Deborah and Ruth to the right of Joshua, Samuel and Saul around 1050, and Solomon at 970.

3. bOOK repOrT: If you are using a bookshelf visual, add a second shelf marked “History of Israel” and the 12 books, Joshua through Esther, in green. For a little fun, have puppets or actors in book costumes do the introduction.

4. gOd’s QualificaTiOns: Think of the people God chose in our themes thus far: Adam and Eve sin. Sarah laughs at God. Jacob cheats. Moses tries to get out of his assignment. The people of Israel grumble and complain. Saul becomes murder-ously jealous. And David, the most revered king of Israel, spies another man’s wife in a bathtub, gets her pregnant and has her husband killed. If God can use this mis-

The first blow is half the battle.

– Oliver Goldsmith

Time Line Cartoon VIIOf Tents & Kings

(Enlarge and place near 1000 B.C.)


fit bunch, God can use anybody! Give small groups three minutes to write a poem or jingle that begins: “God must be crazy…” and ends with, “If God can love these folks…” Read the poems and print them in a bulletin.

5. Wandering Off: † Blindfold one volunteer and put them into the center of a big circle of other guests. Pick one person in the circle to be “the source” and tell the blindfolded volunteer to walk to this person, using only clues from what they can hear. However, have the rest of the people in the circle yell and talk loudly as well, even trying their best to imitate the voice of the person who is “the source.” Play a couple of times, and share how the people of Israel were pulled in different direc-tions when they began to live life in the land God had given them. God sent judges to get them back on track. Discuss: “What different voices do people hear in our society? What does God use to get people back on track? How does he use you?”

6. media mix: Bring in a mix of songs and movie clips to illustrate your point.

sOng: Head to YouTube® and view “All Things New” by Steven Curtis Chapman off of his disc by the same name. Google the lyrics and ask your groups, “What is this song saying about God’s mercy? Who could be the “hopeless” people in this song? Why does God take less-than-perfect people and make them agents of God’s plan?”

mOvie classic: † Rent Herbie: Fully Loaded (2005) and play the scene from the 49:14 mark to the 51:49 mark (or, if you have the time, to the 54:47 mark). Set up this clip: Maggie Peyton (Lindsay Lohan) is part of a racing family, and is struggling with her overprotective father for acceptance as a racer. She gets an special 1963 VW beetle as a college graduation gift, and the car eventually leads her to challenge racing champ Trip Murphy (Matt Dillon). In this scene, Maggie is caught between wanting to protect her beloved Herbie car and her desire to be taken seriously as a driver. She eventually wagers Herbie and loses him to Trip. Her desires end up costing her. Ask your guests, “Have you ever foolishly taken chances because you desired some-thing? Have you ever acted out of character in order to fit in, for instance? Would you do anything differently if you had it to do over again? What part did grace play in the outcome?” Note: This clip would fit in nicely with the Life Line.

You could also try National Treasure (2004) and play the scene from about the 1:43:00 to 1:45:32 mark when the group is in the “City of Gold” and have found an area of pulleys, lifts and stairs that lower them closer to the bottom of the city. Ben-jamin Gates (Nicolas Cage) is gripping his colleague Abigail (Diane Kruger) by the hand as she is dangling from a crumbling lift. Ben Gates looks in to her eyes and says, “do you trust me?” She replies, “yes.” He drops her and she hits the lift below. Ask your groups: “Have you ever been in a situation when you were unsure God was holding you, but you knew you had to give in even though you were afraid or unsure?” In spite of ourselves, God knows what’s best for us and sometimes we need to let go and let God move in our life.

D. Creative Interruption: Weakest FINK (Weekly Terms)Use the game show format on the PowerPoint to explore and understand the five key terms of the week.

E. Bible Time †Have groups read and highlight the encouraging words God gave to Joshua on the edge of the Promised Land in Joshua 1:9. Write “Be Strong!” in the margin. Now read and highlight I Samuel 3:10. The boy Samuel heard God calling in the night. This was his response. Write “Good Answer!” in the margin. Is that the response you give to God when the voice of the Spirit stirs you in the night? Next, take groups on a journey through the history of Israel as they enter and settle in the Promised Land. Introduce key figures and review major events from Joshua to Solomon as

Discoveries are often made by not

following instruc-tions. By going off the main road, by

trying the untried.

– Frank Tyger


time permits. Again, you may choose to walk through the following verses together, or have small groups read the following and make general reports. Have groups highlight and mark their own Bibles as suggested. Note: Because of the volume of material in this theme, consider giving part of the highlighting as (gulp!) homework for groups to do together as part of their family devotions.

n JOshua: This book begins where the previous theme left off, with Moses dead and Joshua stand-ing at the edge of the Promised Land. Have groups highlight 1: 2, 5 and 9, and write “The Conquest Begins” in the margin. The tribes of Israel wandered 40 years in the wilderness. Finally, God’s promise of the land—a promise made to Abraham 500 years earlier—is about to come true. There is only one problem: the land is full of people already. A brutal and bloody conquest begins. This is as strange a history as any Hollywood screenwriter could write in an R-rated movie (or worse). A prostitute is saved (chapter 2), a hill of foreskins are cut off (chapter 5) and people are tricked out of their cities and butch-ered (chapter 8). Did groups know that such stories existed in the Bible? Sing “Joshua Fought the Battle of Jericho” if you wish, but don’t have too much fun. Joshua’s army murdered every human and most of the animals they could get their hands on. Ask groups, “How was this God’s will?” Let them strug-gle with the question and thank God for the mercy of Jesus who says, “Put away your sword,” (Matthew 26:52) to the new covenant people. As the book comes to a close, each of the twelve tribes (descen-dants of the twelve sons of Israel) settles in a differ-ent part of the land. Joshua’s final challenge is worth highlighting in 24:15. Write “Choose the Lord” in the margin.

n Judges: After settling in the land, Israel is tempted to worship other gods. This infidelity causes them to lose many battles. God raises judges to deliver them. Read and highlight 2:16 and write “Judges” in the margin. Highlight 4:4. Introduce Deborah and write “Deborah the Judge” in the margin.

n ruTh: The daring, loyalty and commitment of a foreign woman kept the promise of blessing alive. Ruth’s most famous words, in 1:16, are quoted often at weddings, but are actually the words of a woman to her destitute mother-in-law, Naomi. Highlight them and write

“Ruth’s Loyalty” in the margin. This young woman’s willingness to stay with Naomi and serve the one true God grafts her into the promise. She becomes the mother of Obed, the great grandmother of David, and thus, the ancestor of the Messiah.

n i and ii samuel: Samuel was dedicated to God from birth. Salvation history takes a turn as Israel demands a king. Samuel warns Israel that kings will cause trouble, tax them and take their sons to war. The people get their way and Samuel, now the prophet, anoints Saul as the first king of Israel. Saul fails to obey God, and the shepherd boy David is chosen. (God chooses a young person again!) David is blessed in battle after battle. Yet, when he becomes a rich, power-ful king, he, too, abuses his power. Tell the story of Bathsheba in II Samuel 11. Highlight verses 2-5 and write “David sins” in the margin.


Highlight verse 15 and write “David plots murder” in the margin. Tell the story of Nathan’s trap to set the stage for the Psalms. Highlight 12:7 and write “David Exposed.” Highlight verse 13 and write “David repents.” Even though David is forgiven, there are still consequences.

n i Kings: Solomon becomes king. He asks God for wisdom over power and wealth. Highlight 3:9. Write “Solomon Prays for Wisdom” in margins. Solomon builds the temple in Jerusalem. Highlight 8:23, 27. Write “Temple Dedication Prayer” margins. A series of kings fol-lows, mostly bad. Israel falls away from God again and again.

F. Cartoon of the WeekReinforce the theme by introducing this week’s cartoon using the PowerPoint slides or an enlarged version of the cartoon provided. Idea: For added fun, invite actors or the entire group to read it with cartoonish voices.

III. SMALL GROUP TIMEDismiss to FAITH5 Small Group Time. Use this theme’s chapter of your H2H Journal, or print both the Youth and Guide Handout to distribute. If using the handouts, you will also need to distribute the Home Huddle Handout, containing the nightly Bible verses for FAITH5 Home Huddles. Tip: Plan at least 30 minutes for Small Group Time.

IV. CLOSING Please don’t let your small groups fade away after meeting. Bring everyone back together for a contemplative closing. Dim the lights and light a candle to set the mood for this moment of quiet reverence.

A. Theme Song ReviewGather groups back with a quiet version of the theme song.

B. Wrap-up ReflectionThank everyone for their attention once again, then reflect on the Bible verse and theme one final time before prayers and blessings. Let them read the PowerPoint slides silently as the theme song plays or is sung. Move from there into prayer.

Even though God’s people sin, fail and lack courage, God directs, delivers and con-tinues in covenant with them as they enter the Promised Land. They demand a king and are given what they want, only to see that getting what they want isn’t always so wonderful. Even David, saved by God again and again, sins greatly and must be confronted before he repents. Through it all, God remains faithful and continues to direct the plan of salvation history. When God called Samuel to change the world, the boy answered, “Speak, Lord, your servant is listening.” Is that how you will answer God’s call?

C. Prayer Journey by Rev. Herb Brokering

When small people cast long

shadows, the sun is going down.

– Venita Craven


Dim the lights and light candles to build a worshipful mood for prayer. Then sit down, relax, close eyes and…

Float now to a time that is all time, and a space that is all space. Picture power. Pic-ture another kind of power. Picture power in nature, in a tree, in a roaring river, in a seed growing.

Imagine power in a city, power in an office building, in a conference room in ses-sion, power at a desk. Picture power in a cafeteria, in an interview, in a street per-son, in an alley, in a chapel. The power of An instrumental or a guitar.

Picture power in a hospital, in a corridor, in the research laboratory, in a nursery, in a baby, in a night nurse, in an emergency room, in the hands of a surgeon.

Picture power in a school cheer, people sending one another off, greeting one another. Picture power in a banner, in a Bible verse. Let your mind float to the power in a true story, in a secret. Picture the power in an act of kindness. Feel the power of serving, of what it means to give something up, of making a great sacri-fice, going out of your way, risking your life.

Think of having power to follow a dream, remembering something wonderful. Feel the power of being known, someone calling your name, remembering you, honor-ing you. The power of being respected, being famous like a king. Like a queen. Feel the power, imagine the power and know all power comes from God. From God.

“Speak Lord, your servant is listening.”

D. PTA (Praise, Thank, and Ask) PrayersInvite each small group to bring at least one PTA Prayer to this closing time. Invite anyone with special concerns to pray aloud at this time or write their concerns on slips of paper and hand them to you for public reading. Continue with the soft ver-sion of the theme song to maintain the mood.

E. Benediction & BlessingGive a group bene dic tion. Then invite small groups to step to the baptismal font and bless one another with the sign of the cross on the forehead and the following words or their own favorite blessing:

“May you hear the voice of the Lord calling in the night, and may you rise tomorrow to do God’s will.”

All things are possible until they are proven impossible— even the impossible may only be so, as of now.

– Pearl S. Buck


Creative Interruptions are various brain-based teaching pieces designed to enhance your presentation and keep your audience connected. At least once dur-ing the Theme Presentation, take time for a Creative Interruption that refocuses your guests, and brings a brain-based, multi-faceted aspect to the teaching. You may wish to ask or assign small groups to create an interruption.

Art GalleryUse the PowerPoint slides provided plus scans of your own original art to celebrate the theme in images. Weave in quotation slides plus music. For added impact, invite a group to create a large banner, poster or wall-hanging with the verse of the week and the art from the cover of this theme. Raise this new piece of art into the air on fishing line at the moment you unveil the theme. For a very different visual, hang your banner on a tent pitched in the center of your presentation space and do the entire session from that tent.

FINKtoonCreate an original cartoon based on the verse of the week, the theme or one aspect of the Old Testament. Or add your own punch line to the cartoon template pro-vided in the supplemental PowerPoint slide. Display the cartoon in front for all to see. As an alternative, enlarge one of the cartoons in this theme and use it during the presentation time.

Prayer JourneyUse the guided meditation provided or write your own prayer journey on the theme “Of Tents and Kings.” Play the theme song embedded in the PowerPoint slides or a favorite hymn as background music. Consider lowering lights, warm-ing the group up with a stretching and breathing exercise and adding the senses (smell, taste, touch, hearing, sight) to your prayer experience to build the mood. Speak quietly, clearly and slowly. Include the theme verse at the core of the journey. Leave room for the Scripture to sink in and the Holy Spirit to speak.

SkitsAsk or assign a small group to perform one of the skits provided or to create an original three-minute skit on the theme. Be as elaborate and imaginative or as sim-ple as you wish in creating the dialogue, costumes and props.

Theme Song With MovementAsk a musician, small group or a member of your Music Team to perform and teach the theme song, “Be Strong,” or to create their own song based on the verse of the week. After you’ve learned the song, add movement or American Sign Language to make the song even more memorable. Arrange to perform it as a “confirmation choir” at a future worship service.

I have a great responsibility because I can

afford to be honest.

– Mary Sarton

Nobody wants to follow somebody

who doesn’t know where they’re

going.

– Joe Namath

ExtrasCreative Interruptions



Video GodmercialCreate a three-minute video on the theme of God’s call. Catch people exiting wor-ship and ask them to reflect on God’s calling in their lives. Be sure to include a mix of children, teens and elders. If you’d rather do an artsy piece, create a visual collage of monarchs, politicians and military leaders smiling and shaking hands. Contrast these images with pictures of war, oppression and poverty. Time and Life maga-zines and videos are good sources for high quality contrasting pictures. Play Wag-ner’s “Flying Dutchman Overture” or Tchaikovsky’s “1812 Overture” as background music and close with Joshua’s final challenge to Israel, Joshua 24:15. Make sure everyone is involved either in front of or behind the camera.

Weakest FINKMake up your own key terms to supplement the theme using the template slide provided.


seTTing: Outside Samuel’s tentprOps: “We Want a King” protest signscharacTers: Narrator, Samuel, Ser-vant, Israelites (with Monty Python Brit-ish high-pitched accent)

narraTOr: And now the “(your church) Theater and Not-Ready-for-Anytime Players” proudly present “We Want a King.” We take you to a protest outside the tent of Samuel, the judge of Israel.israeliTes: We want a king! (Chanting)samuel: What’s the commotion?servanT: It appears to me that the peo-ple are demanding a king, sir.samuel: A king? God doesn’t want them to have a king. Kings are trou-ble. Quiet! Quiet! (Screaming at top of lungs) QUIIIIIIEEEETTT!(The crowd is silenced) Thank you. Now, what’s all this king business?israeliTe 1: We want us a potentate.israeliTe 2: No, no. A regal emperor.israeliTe 3: No, no, no, no. We want us an imperial constitutional monarchy.samuel: A what?servanT: They mean they want a king.israeliTes: Yeah! We want a king! samuel: What do you want a king for? Isn’t God’s rule enough for you?israeliTe 1: Well, God’s rule is nice…israeliTe 2: …but it isn’t enough.israeliTe 3: We want us something a little more… you know… tangible.samuel: What?servanT: They mean they want some-thing a little more visible. It’s hard for the people to visualize God. So they want someone to represent God for them. You know. Someone like a king.israeliTes: Yeah! We want a king! We want a king!samuel: Quiet! Quiet! QUIIIEEET!Why on earth do you want a king? Do you know how much trouble kings are?israeliTe 1: But all the other nations around us have kings.israeliTe 2: Yeah! What he said.

israeliTe 3: What he said.samuel: That’s a stupid reason. If all the other nations jumped off a cliff…servanT: I don’t think that one’s going to work with them, sir. Too patriarchal.samuel: So, I’m a patriarch. Sue me! Okay. You’re right. Another tactic. Why don’t you stick with the system of judg-es God has in place to rule you?israeliTe 1: We’ve been wandering in this nomadic existence long enough and now that we’re settling down…israeliTe 2: What he means to say is, how are we going to be a great nation unless we look like everybody else?israeliTe 3: Yeah! Like everybody else.samuel: And exactly how do they look?servanT: They have kings, sir.israeliTes: Yeah! And we want us a king, too! We want a king! (Chanting)samuel: A king will demand loyalty from you. israeliTe 1: That’s okay.israeliTe 2: It’s nice to be loyal.israeliTe 3: Yeah! Like everybody else.samuel: A king will make demands. Set laws. Aren’t God’s laws enough? israeliTe 1: No! We need new ones!samuel: New laws? Like what?israeliTe 1: (Pausing) Uh, like… like… like the law… the law of gravity.israeliTe 2: Yeah! Gravity.israeliTe 3: Yeah! We want gravity! We need gravity. (Pause) What’s gravity?samuel: A king will draft your children into armies. Take away your sons. Steal your daughters for his harem. Tax the best of the fields and flocks.israeliTe 1: That’s okay. We want taxes.israeliTe 2: Yeah! We love taxes.israeliTe 3: Yeah! (Pause) What are taxes?samuel: You’re better off living by God’s laws and with the judges in place.israeliTe 1: But we want to be like everybody else.israeliTe 2: Yeah! What he says.

israeliTe 3: Yeah! We want a king!israeliTe 1: You better do what we tell you and appoint us one whom God approves of or we’ll go out and pick one ourselves.samuel: I’m warning you. God wants you to serve and obey only God. And in that day that you have a king, your cry will go out, but the Lord will not answer.israeliTe 1: That’s all right.israeliTe 2: We’ll just call someone else.israeliTe 3: Yeah! We’ll call… the king!israeliTes: (Chanting) We want a king! We want a king! We want a king!servanT: Better give them what they want, sir. You’ll have a riot on your hands.samuel: Okay. I’ll do it. But I guarantee, they’re not going to like it. Quiet! Quiet! QUIIIIIEEET! (The crowd is silenced) I’ll do as you wish. I will anoint Saul, son of Kish, as the first king of Israel. And after him David. And after David, Solomon. And after that, a whole slew of miser-able despots will follow.israeliTes: (Cheering) Yeah!israeliTe 1: We like despots.israeliTe 2: We adore despots.israeliTe 3: Yeah, we do. (Pause) What’s a despot?servanT: A despot is a rotten, miser-able, low-down, dictatorial, egomania-cal king!israeliTes: King? Yeah! We want a des-pot! (Carrying Samuel)narraTOr: And so Samuel finally gave in. He anointed Saul the first king of Israel. And after Saul came David, and then Solomon. And after that came a whole slew of miserable, rotten, well, you know. And within a few years, instead of giving their allegiance to God, the nation of Israel had become just like everyone else. And their cheers eventu-ally changed to… well, you probably can guess it.israeliTes: (Carrying Samuel out) Down with the king! Down with the king!samuel: Quiet! Quiet! QUIIIIIIEEEET! Somebody call 911! Quiet!


we want a king

Old TestamentSKIT A

07by Rich

Melheim


seTTing: Hillside battlegroundprOps: Stones, slingshot, helmet, base-ball catcher’s chest protector, stickcharacTers: Narrator, David, Goliath, Brothers 1-3, Philistines 1-3

narraTOr: We join our hero David, son of Jesse, and his brothers as they pre-pare for battle with the mighty Philis-tine, Goliath.brOTher 1: Are you sure you want to do this, little bro? brOTher 2: No offense, Dyno Dave, but Goliath has a knack for making people a snack, if you know what I mean.brOTher 3: He is rather large. Maybe you should just go back to the sheep.david: Yeah, yeah, yeah. He’s nine feet tall, 600 pounds with armor that weighs another 200. Blah, blah, blah. He’s nothing. I used to wrestle bears and lions for fun.brOTher 1: Yeah, but this bear carries his own spear and javelin.david: Have some faith in your little brother. He’s only a man. Flesh and blood. brOTher 2: Let’s just hope this man leaves you with some flesh without spilling too much of your blood.(Goliath and his crew approach)brOTher 3: Suffering Syria! Here he comes. We have time to bug out.brOThers: Yeah, let’s go.

david: We’re staying!gOliaTh: Who is the fool who accepted my challenge? Step forward!david: It is I, David, who will free my people from you Philistines.gOliaTh and philisTines: (Ad lib) Ha ha. You kidding? Who’s the runt?gOliaTh: This must be some sort of joke. My breakfast weighed more than you. Who are you to think you can defeat me, the mighty Goliath?david: I am David, servant to King Saul, servant of the Most High God!philisTine 1: Oh, I know this kid. He’s the shrimp who plays harp for Saul when he has bad dreams.philisTines: (Ad lib) Ha ha ha. (All play invisible instruments) La la!gOliaTh: C’mon! There’s got to be more than this. Send me a soldier!philisTine 2: What are you gonna do, put Goliath to sleep with a lovely can-tata? How about a little sonata?(Laughing continues)philisTine 3: Hey Goliath, better get your jammies on. Nighty night!(Laughing continues) Ha ha!david: Today, I will defeat you, Goli-ath, and show everyone that Israel has a God.gOliaTh: And will you be beating me up with your little stick?david: Look, you biology experiment on steroids, you can come against

me with a sword and javelin, but I come against you with the power of Almighty God; the God whom you have defied. The Lord doesn’t need swords or shields to save his people. (Takes out his slingshot)philisTine 1: (Pause) A slingshot? Oooooo…(Laughing continues)philisTine 2: What? Not enough room to carry the pea shooter? Ha ha ha!(Laughing continues)philisTine 3: Hey kid, is that thing load-ed? (Laughing continues) Ha ha!(David rears back and lets the sling-shot fly. Goliath tumbles to the ground. Laughing stops)philisTine 1: Ah… nice shot.all philisTines: (Ad lib) I’ve seen enough. Yeah, we can go. War’s over.(Philistines run out) brOTher 1: I know you didn’t learn to shoot like that in 4H.brOTher 2: Well done, bro!david: Let’s go tell the king.brOTher 3: Remind me not to make any more jokes about his harp playing, will ya fellas?narraTOr: And so, the little shepherd boy, David, filled with the power of the Spirit, returned to Jerusalem where he was celebrated as hero of Israel and later was crowned king. (Applause)


guess who’s coming to dinner?

Old TestamentSKIT B

07by Pete

Erickson


seTTing: Chris’ housecharacTers: Chris and PatprOps: Couch, chair (house setting)

(Pat walks in)paT: (Blurting out) I’m here because I need your support.chris: I’m fine, how are you? That’s usually the line I say when I respond to people who walk in the room. But usually they start with “Hey Chris, how are you?”paT: OK. “Hello!” (Pause) Now, I need your support.chris: What could be so urgent? Let’s see... Oh! Were you outwitted by your third-grade neighbor again playing “Go Fish?”paT: Worse!chris: Worse? Can’t find the keys to your scooter that doesn’t need a key?paT: Worse!chris: Really? Wow. Well, by all means, enlighten me on your sad situation.paT: (Blurts out) I want to be a teacher!chris: You want to be a teacher? (Pause) Of children?paT: Yes!chris: It’s a little weird, but I guess if criminals can rehabilitate themselves and rejoin society, then really bad stu-dents can want to be teachers.paT: That’s what I said.chris: Why would you want to be a teacher? You hate school.

paT: First, I love school food. Second, I’d get summers off. Third, guests fear teachers.chris: (Sarcastic) Well it sounds like you have three really rock-solid reasons for wanting to be a teacher. What’s holding you up?paT: Remember the “career tests” we all took earlier this year from the counsel-lor’s office? My test doesn’t say I should be a teacher.chris: Well, my dad told me his test said he should have been a forest ranger and he’s been a pretty average accountant for twenty years.paT: Well, my dad tends to agree with the results of my test.chris: Certainly parents always have big dreams and visions for their own children, but usually will support you anyway.paT: Yes, but the school counsellor agrees with the test and my dad.chris: Sounds like this test nailed it if your dad and counselor agree. What is this mysterious vocation everyone seems to agree on?paT: Botanical Implementation Spe-cialistchris: Sounds cool. What is it?paT: (Sheepishly) A landscaper.chris: What’s wrong with that? paT: It’s not a teacher! Why can’t they just let me do what I want to do?chris: I think people want what’s best

for you. You know, what makes the most sense. They want to save you from disappointment and help you find the best fit for your gifts to be used. paT: Really? They’re not just doing it to mess with my head?chris: No. In fact, it’s a lot like God leading and guiding God’s people in the world. God sent messengers to help people understand the message that God wants all of us to use the gifts we’ve been given to bless the world. Now the only thing to think about is do you want to use the gifts God has given you or go on your own and roll the dice with a job that might not fit. And, I might add, potentially stunt the growth of countless children. Besides, maybe one day, you could teach land-scaping, or botanical implementation, or whatever you want to call it. Who knows!paT: I’m glad God sent a nerd like you to remind me that God gave me gifts and will protect me as I use them. (Tak-ing a deep breath) Wow. I think I just got car sick saying that.chris: I felt woozy just hearing it. Now, don’t you have some perennials to plant at my mom’s house?(Pat and Chris walk out together)paT: Very funny. You know, I’m pret-ty good with a shovel, so you better watch it.


hold my calls

Old TestamentSKIT C

07by PJ

McCluskey


Question: Which of the following is not in the right chronological order?: A.) Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, B.) Jacob, Joseph, Moses, C.) Moses, Joshua, David, D.) David, Solomon, RuthQuestion: Who became the leader of Israel directly after Moses?: A.) King David, B.) Deborah, the Judge of Israel, C.) King Solomon, D.) General Joshua, Moses’ right-hand manQuestion: What was the major problem with the Promised Land as Joshua prepared to enter it?: A.) It had no ocean front property, B.) It was empty of all life, C.) It was full of rather large and dangerous people who didn’t exactly want to move out, D.) It had no mall within miles or bus systemQuestion: How did Joshua and the Israelites conquer Jericho?: A.) They sent a big wooden horse to the gates with soldiers hidden inside, B.) They marched and sang and blew trumpets until the walls fell in, C.) They set the city on fire, D.) They played clarinet music until the people begged for mercy Question: Soon after settling in the Promised Land, the Children of Israel: A.) Forgot the God who brought them out of Egypt, B.) Started worshipping other gods, C.) Both A and B, D.) Opened a lot of casinosQuestion: Samuel was called by God to be a prophet when he was: A.) Sleeping in the temple, B.) Finished with his seminary studies, C.) Still a young boy, D.) Both A and CQuestion: Israel wanted a king, but Samuel said it was a bad idea because: A.) Kings are highly over-rated, B.) Kings only cause trouble, C.) Taxes would go way up, D.) He was concerned they’d trust in their king, not in GodQuestion: Samuel anointed Saul king, then later chose a shepherd named: A.) Stinky, B.) David, C.) Solomon, D.) ElvisQuestion: David moved the capital to Jerusalem, where: A.) His son Absalom staged a rebellion against him, B.) His son Solomon built the temple, C.) His son Samuel heard God calling in the night, D.) Both A and B

Final QuestionIn Joshua 1:9, God promised the Children of Israel, “The Lord your God is…:” A.) “…with you if you keep out of trouble,” B.) “…with you wherever you go,” C.) “…with you if you promise to tithe 10% to the church,” D.) “…with you if you promise to kill everyone you encounter”

Quiz Answers: D, D, C, B, C, D, D, B, D, B

quizbowl

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I. OPENING...O ld T esTamenT 7 — 1 Objective To help groups understand how God’s covenant continued as Israel established a nation, and to lead them to experience God’s grace