Hilarian - Issue 1 2016

1Autumn 2016.

Edition 1Autumn 2016

2 The Hilarian. 3Autumn 2016.

3

4

5

6

7

8

13

15

17

18

19

21

22

23

24

25

26

Table of Contents

Letter from the Editor

Welcome from the President

Ligertwood or the Oscars?

Oscars Award Winners

Meet the AULSS Team

AULSS OpeningParty: Sue Me

The Ultimate Uni Playlist

Legal Fantales

Good Music

Mi Goreng is Your Goreng

Hot Tips from the LawSchool Life-councilor

Insight from an LKSenior Associate

AULSS Careers Fair 2016

Womadelaide

A Message fromLipman Karas

End of EditionQuizzes

Edition 1, Autumn 2016Published April 2016

EditorsPatrick EdwardsSarah Wormald

DesignAngela Watson

ContributorsAlison Jones, Clare Mingorance, Elly Zola.

Thankyou to our sponsorLipman Karas.

The Hilarian

DISCLAIMER: This publication does not represent the views of the Adelaide University Law School. The University of Adelaide does not endorse this publication. This publication is the sole production of the Adelaide University Law Students’ Society (AULSS).


Letter From The Editor Welcome fromthe President

The Hilarian Team

Patrick Edwards Editor Angela Watson Design Sarah Wormald Editor

University of Adelaide Law School, the place where dreams are made and contracts are broken. Welcome to all of the first years out there reading their first ever issue of The Hilarian, it’s never as funny as you expect but its funnier than Foundations of Law.

Welcome to those of you who elected to return to law school, I know it was tempting to drop out and focus on your finance degree instead, but let’s face it, you’d miss the hexagons and telling people that you’re studying law. 2016 is already shaping uptobe a fantastic year at the Hiliarian, if Donald Trump can be a serious contender for presi-dent of the USA, then surely we can pull together a few funny articles and informative tidbits to help law students get through their degree. We have a new team, and for the first time (that we are aware of), our team includes a graphic designer. Take note of how this facilitates the careful manipula-tion of the masses, convincing even the most cynical law student that the Hilarian is a more than just a bunch of students who find the 140 charac-ter limit of Twitter too restrictive to accurately portray the true depth of

their own self-importance. I mean, where else can I write an opinion piece about being upset about being called a rich white boy. It did hurt my feelings though. The AULSS are currently work-ing their arses off to make this year one to remember.

The events team have begun to mould out the perfect law ball experience in June, I have been assured that the event will be classy enough to vali-date your private school education, but tacky enough to validate your love of doing shoeys on the sensual, sweaty back rub that is the dance floor at Fat Controller. Make sure you get your hands on a copy of the expertly curated careers guide if you haven’t already. The careers guide is an incred-ibly handy tool for getting a better understanding of the endless number of jobs that only 1 in 4 of us will get. Luckily however, there is an “alterna-tive careers” section that lists some other possibilities for usat the end of this magical educational journey such as: chair of local neighbourhood watch committee, parking inspector and alternative careers list compiler. There are a number of awesome social jus-

tice events coming up (details on page ???). In particular, make an effort to get around Walk for Justice. It’s a great cause to get involved with and it would be pretty weird to study law and not agree that justice should be accessible for all. Also the free breakfast was re-ally good last year, Julia Gillard served me quiche, what a trip.

The social justice breakfasts are al-ways a good time, it’s a great chance to network with other law students and listen to interesting speakers. It’s our pleasure to be bringing you the latest law school news and hopefully a few lol’s too. We aim to make things light and funny because we know how much seriousness you have to readon the day to day. H

XOXO

The Hilarian has long provided law students with much needed comic relief in times of great stress, namely, week one until you fend off the crowds to exit the Wayville tin shed for yet another semester.

You may laugh (we hope!) but humour is serious business, as ironic as that might be. To be precise I consulted a trusted and reliable source, Wikipedia, which provides, humour (in Common-wealth English) |noun [ mass noun ] is the tendency of particular cognitive experiences to provoke laughter and provide amusement.

“Julia Gillard served me a quiche, what a trip.”

SHH!Answers to the wordsearch on

page 26...

Welcome to the first edition of The Hilarian for 2016!Stephanie Kolaczkos

Patrick Edwards

Let’s Make The Law School Great Again

In fact, Professor of philosophy, John Morreall, informs us that humour al-lows us to cope better withstressful situations.

And as resourceful and savvy law stu-dents (i.e. find anything that will make our lives easier) by merely laughing we can better cope with the stress of cramming an entire semester into one week (aka SWOTVAC). As Professor John claims, in short, you will have greater internal resources for being happy and this is likely to manifest itself in greater physical wellbeing.

That’s right people, in avoiding doing actual study by picking up this high quality publication and absorbing its laughter-inducing powers, you are equipping yourself with one of the soul’s best weapons in the fight for self-preservation.

So sit back, relax, and let TheHilarian help you. H

R

L

B

E

I

A

E

A

B

U

K

J

J

I

S

E

A

T

I

L

T

Q

O

F

B

A

L

O

C

N

F

A

D

I

S

L

D

G

S

D

W

A

W

Q

H

M

D

W

W

M

E

T

A

L

E

S

G

I

E

B

E

R

G

A

A

B

E

N

P

H

I

A

E

P

U

C

T

L

H

Y


Glitz and Glamour

The high fashion of the Oscars is reflected in the high fashion of the law school. While the rest of the uni are content to go about in everyday clothing, this just does not fly in the law school. Entering Ligertwood is like stepping onto the red carpet. Girls looking casual whilst sporting Sass & Bide and Cameo, or Lorna Jane and Lulu Lemon activewear (y’know, to show we’re active AND smart). Boys strutting their stuff in boat shoes and polo shirts. If you are not dressed to the nines in law school then, like, why are you even studying law? You may as well have created a scandal as big as Reese Witherspoon and Tina Fey wearing similar purple dresses.

Social Activism

Social activism is a big part of the law school. Maybe it’s because we are all studying to become soulless lawyers and we feel like we need to justify our career choice by being outspoken and pretending to take action on big social issues. Just like award shows crop up every few months in Hollywood, we have social justice breakfasts every few weeks. And just like Leo and Chris Rock use this time to express their views on climate change and racial discrimination, this is our nice quarter-ly intake of social activism where we can pretend we will become amazing human rights lawyers who will change the world, and not the rich, comfort-able corporate lawyers most of us are destined to become.

Boycotting

In case you’d been living under a rock and somehow hadn’t heard – the Academy Awards were plunged into controversy this year when, for the second year in a row, no black ac-tors had been nominated for awards #OscarsSoWhite. As result, multiple Hollywood superstars decided to boycott the Oscars this year, including Will Smith and Spike Lee. Boycotting in the law school just happens to be

The Oscars. Glitz and glamour. Socialactivism. Boycotting. Leo finallywinning that damn Oscar \(^_^)/.Sounds like the Adelaide Uni lawschool to me. By Sarah Wormald.

a very popular social standing. While law school boycotters rarely (if ever) have some overwhelming social justice issue for their absence, it is part of who they are. The full-time boycott-ers only appear for the most vital of events; exams, free lunches, and law ball. Part-time boycotters frequently skip lectures in favour of a sleep in (Although you could definitely consider boycotting 9am lectures as a form of protest for the social injustice of mak-ing uni students wake up that early just to fall asleep again in the lecture).

Leo Finally Winningthat Damn Oscar

Six nominations and thirteen years later brings the biggest news of the year, nay, the decade. Leo got his hands on that Oscar. Now that he’s finally achieved everything he can in the film industry, its time he explores some other career paths. And by thisI mean decide to come and studyAustralian law at Adelaide university.I mean, does he really haveany other option? H

So in short, the law school is basically the academy awards. But all year round. So own it people, and maybe Leo will turn up in the next freshman class. But now that we’ve established that Ligertwood is, in fact, the Oscars, we have to move on to the most exciting part of the evening: the Awards!

“Ligertwood

“PAWS UP

“

or the Oscars?”“The Awards!”

award winners!”

”

Best Original Screenplay

This Oscar is presented to Bernadette Richards for her implausible Tort Law seminar questions. Such unbeliev-able scenes and scenarios allowed for excellent plot development throughout the semester and also made Titanic look like a walk in the park. Best Actor

And the Oscar goes to… Leonardo DiCaprio Matthew Stubbs. Stubbsy is to be commended for his tremendous one man show in the Principles of Public Law pre-lecture video series. What an impeccable performance! He demonstrated a fine ability to be an engaging method actor. Not only were his pre-lecture videos superb, but his live performance during lectures were made even better through the ‘flipped classroom’ experience (audience interaction and participation is always a crowd favourite). Great work for a first time actor, can’t wait to see what he stars in next. Best Supporting Actress

The Oscar goes to… Gabrielle Ap-pleby for her cameo role in ‘The Kable Debate’ in the Principles of Public Law pre-lecture videos. Gabrielle gave a very convincing performance alongside Matthew Stubbs and played the role of an academic exceptionally well, so much so that she should really con-sider a career in law or academia. Best Director

Presented to Adam Webster for Foun-dations of Law. Overall, Adam con-structed the course very well and paid great attention to detail when directing students through statutory inter-pretation. Bravo.

Best Producer

Confession: I have made this Oscar up so it doesn’t actually exist within the realm of the Academy Awards. Yet if it did, it would definitely be awarded to Dale for the production of his subject ‘International Humanitarian Law and Advocacy’ which he consistently pro-moted throughout InternationalLaw in Semester 2. Best Cinematography

Presented to Andrew Stewart for Con-tract Law. Andrew is to be commend-ed on his lecture PowerPoints as they were crafted beautifully with signifi-cant thought given to aesthetics and animation. He achieved a fine balance between the use of sound effects and slide transitions and paired these with great angles and an innovative use of clip art. Well done. Best Short Film

Take your mind back (or fast forward) to Property Law because the Oscar for Best Short Film goes to the videos played in each Property Perspectives seminar. How a short film on Dentists and Cricket relates to Property, I will never know…?

Best Adapted Screenplay

With constant references to popular culture, the award for Best Adapted screenplay goes to the 2015 Contracts take home exam for referencing artists and songs from the Triple J Hottest 100, and to the final Property exam for being taken straight out of an episode of Suits.

Best Soundtrack

This award goes to the very deserv-ing Evan Richards. If you had Evan as a seminar leader in Property you would be well aware of his ‘Property Law’ theme song. Even if you were not in his class, you can have the best of both worlds by listening to it on YouTube. Unfortunately, Evan had to decline our offer to perform his song during the live ceremony. Best Documentary

I am going to leave this Oscar winner for the First Years to decide because they will without a doubt be bombard-ed with a series of “Learning Mod-ules” over the next few weeks which essentially double as documentaries. The ever-popular module on ‘Academic Dishonesty’ is a strong frontrunner and contender for the golden statue, however I believe the underdog in this category is the ‘Guide to Referencing’ module. Stay tuned to see how this fierce competition is settled. Best Picture

There are two types of attendees at Law Ball; those with a Snapchat story either less than 10 seconds or over 100 seconds. There is no medium. As a result, this Oscar goes to everyone who has directed their own Snapchat story at Law Ball (or intends to this year). Your work does not go unno-ticed, and even if your Snapchat story is 257 seconds long… at least you can use it to refine your timeline of events and ‘fill in the blanks’ from the even-ing. Special consideration is given to those stories utilising location GeoFil-ters, emojis and the new GeoLenses (double points are being offered this year if you manage to coordinate a Face Swap at some point throughout the night, and triple points if itfeatures a lecturer). H

What a year it has been for Ligertwood. We have been witness to someof the finest performances by academics and have been presented with aseries of articulate pre-lecture videos and learning modules that only a true visionary could produce. The artistic integrity of the Adelaide Law School is stronger than ever and I have faith that 2016 will bring an even greater year for academia and performance. By Alison Jones

After considerable deliberation, it gives me great pleasure to announce the Oscar winners for this season.


The Adelaide University Law Students’ Society (AULSS or LSS for short), represents you, Adelaide Law Students, on campus. We are a group of students who have been elected to help you out in a variety of ways. We organise events, such as the much discussed and infamous Law Ball, pub- crawls and other social nights. We also run an assortment of competitions to appeal to your competitive side. The LSS organise the annual Careers Fair and publish a Careers Guide to assist you in exploring po-tential career opportunties and create invaluable contacts. We do heaps of stuff to make your life at Law School a little more enjoyable and rewarding!

Meet theAULSSTeam

PRESIDENT:STEPHANIE KOLACZKOS

For me, starting a new university year almost always begins with watching Legally Blonde. Not particularly mature I know, but I’d like to think most law students can benefit from soaking up all that enthusiasm Elle Woods evokes in her sassy, assertive yet amicable and overly-friendly nature. Unfortunately, I can hardly carry out my role as President in a way that Elle would – for one I am quite certain the Law School would not approve of an entirely pink inspired AULSS office to dominate the ground floor of Ligert-wood, despite the architectural awe it would/ could/should be.

But not unlike Elle, the AULSS will keep you in the loop on social events, careers, volunteering and employ-ment opportunities, competitions, social justice initiatives and everything in between to make your law school experience more than just lugging ridiculously heavy books around! So be sure to hit us up with any thoughts, ideas or feedback you might have so you can make uni days your best days yet!

VICE PRESIDENT(ADMINISTRATION):GEORGIA GRAY

As Vice President (Admin) it’s my job to make sure the LSS can deliver you the events that YOU love! I do all the behind the scenes work to make sure everything runs smoothly; and namely that the annual Law Ball gets paid for so that you guys can all enjoy the fes-tivities and open bar!

But my job isn’t just about paying peo-ple – I help ensure that the committee runs smoothly, and assist all members of the committee with whatever they need! I work closely with the execu-tive team to make sure we’re using our resources in the best way possible to make YOUR law school experience great.

Feel free to send me an email if you have any queries about the LSS, not just monetary related, at [email protected] or come say hello if you see me hanging around avoiding being studious (I love constructiveprocrastination)!

VICE PRESIDENT(EDUCATION):JAMES BAMPTON

REPS: Paula Papastamatis, Beau Brug

The job of the Education portfolio is to provide students with all the resources to excel in their studies. Whilst this doesn’t sound particularly exciting, we run seminars and provide you with tips and tricks on exams and study techniques (the highlight of which are free tea, coffee and cakes). We also act as the representative body of the AULSS on the national stage at the Australian Law Students’ Association (ALSA), so we ensure that you are kept up to date with initiatives and resources for students from across the country.

The Education team has a particular focus on First Years (come on now, you were once one too!), helping in the transition from high school to university life. We run social events to help you get to know your peers, seminars to help you understand assignments, and run an election for two First Year students to come on to the committee as First Year Representatives. Law school can be quite overwhelming (or underwhelming, if you don’t go to any lectures) so please be sure to contact us at [email protected] if you have any con-cerns or just want to have a chat (or alternatively if you want to discuss how you went in AFL Dream Team last weekend).

VICE PRESIDENT(CAREERS & SPONSORSHIP):KATIE WARNER

REPS: Jack Culbertson, Samuel Leeson, Soraya Pradhan,Mariah Pavlou, Cameron Villarosa

The role of the Careers and Sponsorship team (fondly known as the C&S dream team) is to liaise with various firms and organisations to provide sponsorship for the AULSS. Without such sponsorship the AULSS wouldn’t be able to run the variety of essential events that allow you (as desperate job-seeking law students) to network with practitioners and other key individuals in the legal in-dustry. As the esteemed Harvey Spector once said: “First impressions last. You start behind the eight-ball you’ll never get in front”. With this advice in mind, I encourage you all to attend our Careers Fair, networking events and the variety of seminars run by our team. In any event, I hope to see you all around in the hexagonal-themed, asbestos-filled paradise we call Ligertwood.

Here’s a quick introduction tous so you know who to say hi to:

“But not unlike Elle, the AULSS will keep youin the loop onsocial events...”

“... the hexagonal-themed, asbestos-filled paradise we call Ligertwood.”

“If I have my way, winners will also have their names engraved in stone...”

COMPETITIONS DIRECTOR:THOMAS BLOKLAND

REPS: Henry Materne-Smith, Nathan Sexton, Damon Nicholson, AirlieWaterman, Bec Slimming, CallumDisario, Shane Martin

As the Director of Competitions, I or-ganize my wonderful team so that they can coordinate all the competitions and training days run by the AULSS. I like giving advice, so feel free to shoot me a message on Facebook if you need some. Not legal advice though, as you’ll soon find out, that’s a big no-no. I know it is unlikely that you have heard about competitions but basically, they improve a number of your legal skills, such as advocacy, negotiation and examination.

Why do competitions? Well, for one, winning a competition is the differ-ence between Law School student and Law School Royalty! Maybe that’s a stretch, but you gain some incredibly useful skills, meet a number of well-established professionals and academ-ics in the field and, if you win, you get the opportunity to represent the University at national competitions! (For IHL, you could even represent Australia!). If I have my way, winners will also have their names engraved in stone to be displayed in the law school for many years to come. (Seriously though, we have some shields that I am going to get up-to-date, so you could be Law School Famous.)


ACTIVITIES DIRECTOR:JAMES D’ALESSANDRO

REPS: Alison Jones, Harriet Iles, Marie Rocca, Jaclyn Heinrich, Holly Carter

The ‘Activities’ portfolio, is the best portfolio. Why? Because my portfolio work tirelessly to give law students the opportunity to get drunk (responsibly of course) at various fun and exciting events! This year, our vision is to make sure that every law student wakes up with a hangover because they had such a great time the night before at all the various events that we have organised, but of course, as I said above, none of you will let that happen because you will all drink responsi-bly... Also, yes, I’m the guy that you can direct your angry ‘Law Chats’ posts to about how the tickets to Law Ball have sold out too quickly.

In all seriousness, I’m looking forward to working with the group of keen and committed committee members on my portfolio. We have made it our mission to make sure that we listen to sugges-tions and organise the greatest law events this side of the Torrens River. Please send the activities portfolio an email or drop into the office to give us any suggestions you have about events past, present and future. We are also continuing our Law School Local program and will release some sweet deals for you to take advantage of around Adelaide.

SOCIAL JUSTICE DIRECTOR:LIAM COBAIN

REPS: Eman Elhelw, Caitlyn Georgeson, Zara Smith, Luke Edwards

Right. Let’s be clear. You’re uni students. You want to get drunk. You want to have fun. We have all been there. Some of you are probably only at law school after watching Suits. You probably... no... DEFINITELY see social jus-tice at the top of this paragraph and think ’I don’t need this’ or ’that can’t be fun.’ Well guess what... you do and it is.

There is no better way of transitioning into the law school than by getting involved and that is exactly what we in the Social Justice Portfolio strive to enable you to do. First and foremost, we want you to be happy, which is why we plan on running a number of initiatives to help give you some well deserved rest from your cases and textbooks.

Once we have you happy, we want to expose you to the impact that the law has on social justice in our community, and more specifically, how you can get involved. Social justice breakfasts, volunteering opportunities and other initiatives are all in store to try and link what you learn in the lecture theatre to the real world. H

So buckle up and sober up for the whirlwind of excite-ment that the Social Justice Portfolio will bring you in 2016: stay tuned and we look forward to meeting you!

Meet theAULSSTeam (cont.)

“... work tirelessly to give law students the oppor-tunity to get drunk ...”

“Some ofyou areprobablyonly at lawschool[becauseof] Suits.”


AULLSOpeningPartySue Me

Snaps fromThursday, March17th at Distill


Being a first year newbie, it’s safe to say I’ve got a lot to learn about holding the precious title and reputation that comes with being an Adelaide Uni Law student. I’m not quite sure what the title entails as of yet, but surely it’s not coinci-dental that the standard response I get when telling people my area of study is, “Oh yeah, you’ll fit right in with that Michael Kors bag”…

TO STUDY TOArtist: Jack Garratt (PHASE)

What better way to study than listening to the soulful vocals of Jack Garratt. It was only a few months ago that the UK singer/songwriter burst into our lives with hits such as ‘Breathe Life’ and ‘Weathered’, solidifying his place in our playlists and proving himself as one to watch. Or so it would seem. Cough cough, Brit Awards Critics’ Choice Award. Anyway, I wouldn’t go quite as far as to say this album is perfection, however it is without a doubt worth the listen. Garratt gives us a taste of blues meet electronic, where one minute we’re hearing strong synths and heavy bass, and the next minute pianos and soft acoustics. If there’s one thing to be said, it is that he is not afraid to be experimental within his music, an exceptional quality to have. Regardless of whether it’s the upbeat melody of ‘Chemical’, or the deli-cate nature of ‘I Know All What I Do’, you’ll be left feeling empowered. Perfect for a study session! After listening to this album, you may be puzzled as to who the real Jack Garratt is, but I can assure you it will leave you dying to find out. A lot of potential and great things to come I’m sure.

TO EXERCISE TOAlbum: BLOOM (RUFUS)

Exercise. Some love it, some hate it. Regardless, I guess we need it. Just be mindful, I use the term exercise loosely. Running, cycling, golfing, knitting, Netf-lix… whatever floats your boat. Whatever your specialty, I guarantee Rufus’ new album, ‘Bloom’, will make a great soundtrack. It’s no news to anyone that Rufus are tearing it up in the music world, being one of the most well-known and loved dance music trios of our time. After caus-ing waves with their first album, ‘Atlas’, back in 2013, Rufus has dominated the music scene ever since, playing endless sold out concerts and festivals all over the world. On this latest album, Rufus has duplicated a number of elements from Atlas, but have clearly progressed in doing so. Radiating synths, mixed with an uplift-ing dance beat, and then topped with soothing vocals; it makes for a definite crowd pleaser. It is safe to say that Rufus are extremely good at what they do, no questions asked. Triple J hits ‘Like An Animal’ and ‘You Were Right’ feature on the album, but delve a little further and you’re guaranteed to find some hidden gems. So next work out, get rid of that negative energy with the help of the Summer-y, feel-good vibes of ‘Bloom’. You wont regret it.

The Ultimate Uni Playlist

TO COMMUTE TOArtist: YUMA X Let’s be honest, if there’s one thing we’re all too familiar with, it’s public transport. Pretty much the only upside to this is the chance to chill out and kick back with headphones in, that is, if you aren’t suffering through public transport peak hour, getting up close and personal with people you’d probably rather not. Anyway, to help you get through these tough times, I recommend Yuma X… you can thank me later. Now, unlike the previously mentioned Jack Garratt, Yuma X is yet to release a debut album, however I promise that their current five songs will be more than enough to suck you in and satisfy all of your music needs. So at this point in time, not too much is known of Yuma X, except that they are girl-boy duo from Sydney, and they make damn good music. The duo creates a dreamy, electronic soundscape, just begging for you to get lost in. The beauti-ful, and somewhat seductive, vocals of Lucy float effortlessly over their skillful production of shining synths, pulsing percussion and lyrical loops. I’m predicting big things from these Aussie music newbies! Look them up on SoundCloud: soundcloud.com/weareyuma_x

OLDEN BUT GOLDENAlbum: Trouble Will Find Me (The National) Okay, so I’ve only got a few weeks under my Law School belt, but I can already say I’m feeling the pressure. If there are some of you in the same boat as me, I’ve got the perfect thing for you. They’re called The National, and they will rock your world (not even joking). Their latest album, ‘Trouble Will Find Me’ was re-leased in 2013, so I guess it counts as old, but regardless of the year, this album is quite possibly one of the greatest of all time (big call, I know). The Brooklyn-based boys are veterans in the music industry, having released roughly eight albums and EPs since 2001. And they’re still going! If you’re new to The National, I’d say they fall into the indie rock category, but probably darker and deeper than you’ve ever known. They definitely have a certain uniqueness and individuality about them, putting them in a league of their own. To put it simply, this album is raw, emotional and honest. Matt Berninger’s deep, distinctive voice over simple, yet carefully crafted melodies is an incredibly tran-quil combination. The album explores a number of themes such as love, death and depression, and in true The National style, uses endless metaphors to do so, some of which will have you thinking for hours on end. If nothing else, The National is always good for a cry, so will come in handy for those depressing times when you feel that Law School is becoming all too much. It’s the perfect temporary escape! H-

Favourite track: Surprise yourself

Favourite track: Hypnotise

Favourite track: Graceless

Favourite track: Swimming Pool

Anyway, I’m only a few weeks in and it’s safe to say I’m a bundle of mixed emotions right now. Overwhelmed, excited, and possibly even a little (a lot) scared are just a few of the feelings I’m experiencing at this point in time. I’m not sure about you, but I don’t think I’d quite make it through my days without my one true love - music. That’s why I’ve put together this list of must-listens, guaranteed to get you through any occasion. By Clare Mingorance.


WHO AM I?An Associate Professor in Adelaide law school, this man has fast gained a leg-endary status amongst the students. His subject in first year law is near im-possible to fail since his introduction of the ‘flipped classroom’, and as a result has created the law school viral videos to match. He is also an avid participant in the Professor John Williams Table Tennis Competition. The nicknameawarded to him by students takesthe shape of the classic Australian beer holder. ANSWER: Associate ProfessorMatthew Stubbs.

WHO AM I?The inspiration for many law students to actually study the degree, she has been an advocate for having a brilliant work ethic whilst looking absolutely fabulous. Famously winning her first murder case whilst still in first year at Harvard law, she was one of the few law students to get a job straight after graduating. She is often sited carrying her Chihuahua Bruiser under her arm. Somewhat of a dating guru, she isalso inventor of the popular female pick-up move: the ‘bend … and snap!’ANSWER: Elle Woods.

WHAT AM I?Loved by most, despised by some, this is something most law students could not survive their degree without. The 3000 word torts take-home exam that ‘should only take the length of a normal exam’ would have been failed by countless law students without the assistance of this item. Vital to get through assignments that students have inevitably left to the last minute, this product was so in-demand that a pop up cart selling it had to be erected outside Ligertwood. ANSWER: Coffee.

WHAT AM I?The most anticipated event of the year, this party is in high demand across all three universities in Adelaide. Obtain-ing a ticket is the most stressful event of the year for many students, more so then any assignments or exams, as they often sell out in under a minute. Many students practice refreshing pag-es to build up their reaction times and locate the fastest internet. Becoming a member of the AULSS is highly desir-able for the sole reason that members are guaranteed a ticket. ANSWER: Law Ball.

WHAT AM I?

While the concept of this item is ap-

pealing to many students, the reality

is often much worse. The law school

professors have introduced these into

many of their courses, sometimes

occurring mid-way through a course

or at the end of one. Often given only

24 hours to complete it, students are

told it should not take any longer then

3 hours. However, this is rarely the

case as students begin to resent their

professors, working until 4am to try

and finish it on time.

ANSWER: Take home exam.

WHO AM I?

I emerge from the woodwork when

students are asked to band together in

the dreaded group assignments. There

are multiple of me in every law class.

I am the most hated of any group pro-

ject. I talk big about what I am going

to contribute, but only a couple days

before the assignment is due I sheep-

ishly admit to my group that I have

done nothing, whilst still promising to

get it done in time. My group then all

begrudgingly do my part anyway in

fear I will not produce. I make

enemies for life throughout my

time at law school.

ANSWER: That group member

that does nothing. H

BY SARAH WORMALD.

Good Music

At first it seems like a simple ques-tion… but in the Bolivian jungle, a few days before Australia Day, I found myself being attacked for my beliefs about what is and what isn’t “good music”. I only mention Australia Day because it’s the day that we, the youth, eagerly put on the radio forthe first time since last Oz Day tohear the results of the most im-portant vote we will ever parti-cipate in, the Triple J Hottest 100.

The Triple J Hottest 100

Every year, people are pissedoff when the results come in.The winning song is from anartist that is a sell-out, the songwas overplayed or it’s “just plain S**t”. I genuinely believe that the JJJH100 brings out the absoluteworst in people.

I cannot count how many times I have simply voted for songs so that I could share them on Facebook and people would think I was cool or edgy when really my favourite 10 songs of 2015 were “What do you mean?” by J Biebs 10 times. I know I am not the only per-son that has done this, I can tell from some people’s shared lists that they have done the same, I mean c’mon Brad, I know for a fact you’ve never even heard an Earl Sweatshirt song in your life.

People have a habit of being total snobs when it comes to music taste, in particular people who listen to Triple J (myself included). In 2015 JJJ snobs went nuts when a campaign, #Tayforhottest100, tried to get “Shake It Off” into the countdown. Triple J swiftly banned the song from the countdown on a range of fair enough grounds: You cant have a paid cam-paign via Buzzfeed to get a song in, votes shouldn’t be made based on hate etc etc. However, the PEOPLE went nuts because T-Swizzle is a commercial pop artist who makes a bunch of money and therefore doesn’t deserve to be included… which is the exact kind of snobbery that the people

that started the campaign #TayforHot-test100 were talking about. Theyactually validated the campaignin their reaction.

Hot Tips for JJJH100 2017

1. The JJJH100 brings to light the fact that people take their music taste wayyyy to seriously. Who cares if Jenny likes Justin Bieber and you only listen to instrumental versions ofGerman hip-hop anthems. Let Jenny just be Jenny.

2. In the same way that you should let Jenny be Jenny, just remember that no one gives a crap who you voted for, so vote honestly and don’t share it on Facebook, it looks desperate. When you think about it, it’s a bit like listing your 10 favourite foods or 10 favourite animals, Facebook isn’t a terrible tinder date, you do not have to make crap small talk to your 500Facebook friends.

3. If a song you don’t like wins, feel free to be surprised but don’t get up on your high horse asking “how?” you know how you douche, more people voted for that song than they did for your song. Its a vote, you can’t re-ally argue with it. Besides, isn’t there some thing where its supposed to be

cool to be into stuff that most people aren’t really into? Isn’t it better if you vote honestly and then your songs DON’T make it into the 100? That way you can genuinely feel like the special and unique snowflake that youthink you are.

I am a Belieber (for the sake of argument)

So this guy who was attacking me over beers in the Bolivian jungle, we’ll call him “Mitch”. His angle was that you cannot deny that The Beatles are the greatest band of all time, he even said that Rolling Stone magazine is the authority on what is and isn’t “Good”. His argument was based on the fact he wasn’t into Bieber and other pop artists and as a result they cannot be good. He didn’t give many reasons as to why The Beatles are the greatest band of all time, so I can only assume he means in terms of sales, which means that all the “good” artists from last year must have been Adele, Taylor Swift and the cast of Pitch Perfect 2, the exact kind of art-ists he seemed intent onbringing down.

Mitch and people like him need to stop applying their subjective opinions to a question that calls for an objec-tive measure which probably doesn’t exist anyway. Guys like Mitch can’t let Jenny keep being Jenny, so if you know a guy like Mitch, don’t letMitch be Mitch.

PS. Mitch, if you’re out there, Jus-tin Bieber has been on the cover of Rolling Stone 3 times, sorry I was so confused when you said Justin Bieber couldn’t possibly be good, but also said Rolling Stone is the authority for what good music is. H

In Arthur Conley’s 1967 hit “Sweet Soul Music” he sings a simple, yet elegant line, posing an importantquestion; Do you like good music?By Patrick Edwards.

Belieber’s are encouraged to cut out and stick on their forehead.


Mi Goreng is Your Goreng

Making dinner is a tricky thing when you’re a student. For starters, you either have $0 in your bank account, or you’ve over drawn (probably), so grocery shopping is not really an option. And secondly, those occasional moments where you think to yourself ‘mmm yeah I’m gonna make myself a proper meal’ you will inevitably open those pantry cupboards, only to find endless packets of mi goreng and not much else. So I thought I’d share with you all a couple of tips on how to mix up your mi goreng and make it mi gourmet. Words and photos by Sarah Wormald.

Dinner Party Mi Goreng

Looking to impress? Go no further then the Mi Goreng in your pantry. Dust off one of those disused pots from the back of the cupboard and follow the in-structions of how to prepare on the stove. Already you’ve given your mi goreng that homemade feel, and when your guests arrive they’ll see you painstakingly slaving away at the stove to make their dinner. If you really want to impress, say your parents are coming over and you have to pretend you’ve got your life together, don’t be afraid to splash out a little. Drain the broth and cook them stir-fry style adding a couple chopped spring onions and some shred-ded chicken. Be proud of the ‘oohs’ and ‘ahhs’ emitted from your friends and parents. You deserve them.

Date Night Mi Goreng

Got that big tinder date you’ve been waiting for all week? Don’t bother forking out the cash to take them out, instead treat them to a romantic night in with a bowl of your signature mi goreng. The key to making it romantic is to serve the noodles all in one dish. If you prefer your mi goreng without the broth, heap it all onto one plate and wait for the Lady and the Tramp in-spired date to take of: chomping those noodles right the way down until your lips meet in a euphoric kiss, the fla-vours of the mi goreng intermingling. You get the picture. Enjoy your noodles ramen-style? No problem. Simply stick two straws in a bowl with your noo-dles and broth and enjoy a 50s-diner-style date. Its as if you were sharing a delicious vanilla milkshake without have to splash out and actuallybuy the milkshake! H

Breakfast Mi Goreng

Ever looked at your boring old corn-flakes in the morning and just thought ‘ew, I don’t want cardboard for break-fast AGAIN’ (cause let’s be honest, that’s basically what cornflakes are). Can’t take another avocado ‘smash’ on toast either? Well let your mi goreng be your saving grace as it becomes an unexpected breakfast food. Fry a quick egg and pop it on top of your mi gore-ng. You’ve never tasted a breakfast so satisfying. This trick is especially impressive if you and your friends are hungover after a big night out with the law lads and ladies. Nothing beats that greasy, unhealthy taste of mi goreng, partnered with an egg fried deliciously in even more oil. It’s the stuff dreams are made. And those appreciativemuffled grunts coming from youronly partially awake friends?That’s all you baby.

So next time you’re stuck for what to eat for dinner, get creative and experi-ment with the multiple mi goreng packets I know you have in your cup-board. You might just surprise yourself.

Keep an eye out for news of the AULSS’ annual participation in the WALK FOR JUSTICE. This event, to be held on the 17th of May from 730am - 9am, aims at raising both funds and awareness forJus-ticeNet SA, who provide pro bono legal services for disadvantaged citi-zens in our community.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!

WALK FOR JUSTICE

“...you will recieve aT-Shirt and ... [A]relaxed stroll throughthe Botanic Gardens...”

“...for JusticeNet SA, whoprovide pro bono legal services for disadvantaged citizens...”

By registering and joining our AULSS group, you will receive a T-Shirt and will be able to enjoy a relaxed stroll through the Botanic Gardens whilst the city sleeps, with the incen-tive of a cooked breakfast keeping you going! (Not to mention the breakfast will be served by Chief Justice Kourakis and other legal professionals!) So come one, come all and join up to the AULSS’ team in the 2016 Walk for Justice to support a great cause for people inneed. More details tobe released in April. See you there!”

+ + =Breakie Walking Botanics JUSTICE!

19Autumn 2016.


XOXO

Hi Sandy,

I feel your dilemma, we have all been there, trust me. As a law school life-councillor I’m obliged to offer you advice on your problem using the ever trusty IRAC format. Proven in your first foundations of law course to be the best way to solve any problem.

ISSUES

Every uni student knows the torture of being handed pamphlets, or get-ting roped into a conversation with an activist group. I mean, you can’t very well say ‘no’ and continue walking when they ask ‘do you support gay marriage?’, so then you have to stop and chat to them. It is important to understand that this same torture is also felt by those doing the handing and the roping, as they are rejected by hundreds of students every day. The students trying to avoid this situation will now be referred to as ‘avoidors’ and the people handing outpamphlets as ‘avoidees’.

RULES

There are certain social rules that can be related to your situation. If eye contact is fervently avoided, this is a basic social rule that no interaction will take place. If an avoidor is incredibly busy as he/she walks past, it would be considered rude for the avoidee to in-terrupt them. However, if conversation is instigated, then it is considered rude to then completely ignore the avoidee attempting to start the conversation. Using ‘colourful’ language when ad-dressing the avoidee is also considered socially unacceptable. Battery is also not an appropriate response either. You probably don’t want to be sued in torts. This is not a desired result.

APPLICATION

If you make eye contact with the avoid-ee during your walk from one class to another, you are almost obliged to interact with one another. The key here is to keep your head down. If you have sunglasses, wear them. This makes eye contact much harder. And making no eye contact significantly reduces your chance of an avoidee approaching you, flyer in hand, cheesy smile plas-tered on their face, and slightly dead eyes from performing theirunforgiving task. If you look busy, avoidees are much less likely to come up and approach you. There are a couple different ways to achieve this state, and each one varies in success. The first option is to bring a friend to be in deep conversa-tion with whenever you walk to and from the hub. However, this comes with a few problems. Firstly, the avoidees may take this as an opportu-nity to rope in two people instead of one. This can therefore be a dangerous game, risking it all on the confidence of the avoidee. Secondly, this tactic can be an issue logistically. Unless you happen to have a sizeable, Kardashian-esque entourage, it can be difficult to ensure you have a friend with you at all times. Another, much easier approach, is to be engrossed on your phone. Now that phone has to be the most incredible thing you’ve ever seen. Im-agine Ryan Gosling has just sent you a text and you have to devise the perfect reply, you’ll get there. For an even higher success rate wack in some ear-phones and pretend to jam out to your favourite song. If you seriously commit to jamming out, you might just weird everyone out enough that no one will come with in a few meters of you.

Finally, if you’re not comfortable with any of the above methods, just run. This is simple and effective. You look busy, so they won’t approach you. You are running too quickly for them to intercept you. And if they happen to chase after you, shouting opinions at you, you can probably sue for assault. So it’s basically a win-win.

However, not encountering them at all will be your biggest chance of avoiding the awkward process altogether. For your convenience I have mapped out the spots around the hub the avoidees are typically found, and some alterna-tive routes you could take to avoid them. Please use at yourown discretion.

CONCLUSION

It is therefore possible for an avoidor to walk past an avoidee without having to engage in conversation, however this is not a guaranteed result. H

Dear law school life-councilor,

I have been continuously experi-encing an awkward social situa-tion for the past couple of weeks. Every time I walk somewhere in the uni, particularly the hub or past Napier, I am bombarded with pamphlets and questions about my political opinions. I just want to get to class, or see my friends, but I just can’t seem to walk past them without them en-gaging with me. Please help with some tips. I’m desperate.

Sandy Cohen

Hot Tips With The Law School Life-councilor

Law School Life Councilor

I started at Lipman Karas as a winter clerk. What immediately struck me about the firm in my first week still rings true as a Senior Associate seven years later. LK stands apart for three reasons: the quality of the work, people and culture.

Work

LK is an exciting place to practice law.

As a lawyer at LK you have the opportunity to work on some of the most complex, challenging and interesting litigation projects in Australia and internationally.

These cases require in-depth legal analysis and the distillation of large amounts of factual data. Young lawyers at LK work directly with Principals, as well as counsel and independent experts, on all aspects of their projects, where leading national and international firms act on the other side.

Within eighteen months of being an Associate at LK, I found myself assisting in court in the appeal of Westpac v The Bell Group Limited, which was at the time the largest civil litigation action in Australian history. Other junior lawyers at the firm get similar experience, working on major projects in Australia, Hong Kong, England, the US and several other Asian and offshore jurisdictions.

People

The practitioners and support staff at LK are experts at what they do. They are dedicated, intelligent and resourceful. LK offers unrivalled opportunities for work and to learn from leaders in their field.

But the LK experience is not about technical and strategic acumen only. The people that work at LK are friendly and

Insight from an LK Senior Associate

approachable. They understand that the best results are achieved by working as a team where everyone participates. Each member of the team’s contribution is valued and recognised.

Culture

The culture at a law firm, like any place of work, is extremely important. LK’s culture is open and community oriented. The firm has an active social and community program, with regular social gatherings, fun walks/runs and community initiatives. The firm regularly undertakes pro bono work. Junior lawyers are encouraged to contribute to the direction of these programs, which in turn offers them an insight into the role and functioning of a law firm beyond our core practice of law.

LK takes a genuine long term interest in its lawyers. It has a strong training programme but more importantly, it treats its lawyers as individuals. After clerking at LK for six months, I took a leave of absence to undertake an associateship with Justice Vanstone in the Supreme Court of South Australia, returning to LK afterwards. The firm was also supportive in my undertaking part-time postgraduate studies. Other young lawyers at LK have pursued similar paths.

As the firm has grown, LK has remained an exciting and rewarding place to practise law, steadfastly maintaining its high standards in relation to its projects, people and the opportunities offered to staff.

Lucas Arnold Senior Associate

By Sarah Wormald


AULSSCareersFair2016

Snaps fromThursday,March 24that Bonython Hall


Womadelaide

Womad. The lineup was great this year, the food impeccable, their politi-cal involvement even better (running such programs as Planet Talks and commissioning Indigenous artists and musicians to contribute to the festi-val) and the Speakers Corner patrons remained as cooked as ever.

I do, however, maintain some criti-cisms. I am not pointing fun at that couple whom work at KPMG, sport-ing Ralph and Saba outfits Monday to Friday, yet upon the arrival of Womad-elaide, switch to hemp pants and Bob Brown t-shirts. Nor am I referring to those teenagers sporting Ganesh sin-glets and some form of facial cultural symbol that they personally hold no objective ties to. No. This goes deeper. Dress as you like, wave your hands as you please but do not lie about who you are every other day of the year and do not patronise me for not knowing who Mountain Mocha Kilimanjaro are and for not wanting to sit in a ‘sewing tipi’ with young mothers eating acai bowls discussing how they do not be-lieve in vaccinating their children. Just as the chia seeds expand in your al-mond milk, so do chickenpox through-out your child’s Tee-Ball team.

One of my least favourite elements of the festival is that competitive nature older people develop in re-gards to whom out of their friendship

circle is more culturally experienced, more “worldly”, more carefree, more spiritual… more “om”. ‘Jan, did you hear that Cat Empire are from rural Madagascar?’ ‘Oh of course Marg, I am all about the sounds of rural Mada-gascar’. Or how about those parents who dance barefooted like those tall inflatable dolls you see at car dealer-ships? Draped in paisley renewable fabrics, chirping about empiricism and blitheness, yet sneakily reaching into their woven shoulder bag to grab their Aqium as soon as anyone brushes past them, and refusing to drink any water but that in their thermospre-filled with San Pell.

I don’t understand why so many members of the crowd need to cover up these things. We all know you paid $350 for that laminated 4 day wrist-band, and following that purchase moved your Amex Gold card from your Michael Kors leather wallet to that woven hemp one you bought in India during that heavily insured guided tour Flight Centre organised for you. The most honest 4-day attendees here are the “Poo Crew”.

Actually in googling “March 14th” to find out which form of antiquated race we get the day off for, Urban Diction-ary offered me with the explanation “Steak and Blowjob Day”. Not only did this make me quiver with a sharp re-sentment for humanity, it also offered a surprisingly rather contrary day to celebrate for those elated folk waving their arms in the park. 40% of which watched Cowspiracy a few years ago, and as they brush the dust off their bamboo fibre legionnaire suddenly remember all the horrendous facts re-garding livestock farms, thereupon de-ciding to only eat British India’s Dhaal for the next 4 dinners – until their breakfast on the Tuesday, because you just can’t go past the eggs benedict at My Kingdom for a Horse.

I did, however, learn some useful things from the cultured Womadelaide punters. One being that Orange Blos-som is both an artist performing at the festival and a flavour of biodegradable soy lassi available to me from the food stalls. And that if I put certain pebbles in my water or rub them against my bare core, my insides will be better at digesting and conserving energy- or some other form of Yakult powers. Yet in saying all this, nepotism did score me a free ticket and holy sh*t there were some good doughnutsand chai, and Marlon Williamsreally can sing. H

Till next year,Namaste,xxxx

By Elly Zola.

Lipman Karas is a specialist legal practice representing corporate, government and private clients.

With offices in Adelaide, Hong Kong and London, our team has a proven track record of consistently outstanding results in some of the most challenging, complex and high profile commercial litigation in the Asia Pacific region and internationally.

Local Presence

A career at Lipman Karas provides opportunities and experiences that are unrivalled in South Australia.

Lipman Karas offers practitioners a chance to work with lawyers who are recognised as leaders in their field on litigation projects, investigations and inquiries that are unique in both magnitude and complexity across many jurisdictions.

Clerkship applications close Monday, 11 April 2016. For information on the application process please visit lipmankaras.com.

Global Opportunities

Best International Firm for Work Life Balance 2014, 2015 Best Australasian Firm for Talent Management 2013Best Adelaide Firm 2012, 2013, 2014


Wordsearch

End of EditionQuizzes!*

Congratulations on making it through your first edition of The Hilarian for 2016! Now it’s time to consolidate this newly acquired knowledge with a wordsearch!Answers on page 4.

Rabbit

Distill

Womad

Belieber

Justice

Fantales

Law Ball

Leo

R

L

B

E

I

A

E

A

B

U

K

J

J

I

S

E

A

T

I

L

T

Q

O

F

B

A

L

O

C

N

F

A

D

I

S

L

D

G

S

D

W

A

W

Q

H

M

D

W

W

M

E

T

A

L

E

S

G

I

E

B

E

R

G

A

A

B

E

N

P

H

I

A

E

P

U

C

T

L

H

Y

Which Easter

Egg Are You?

*Tools for procrastination.


HaighsMostly A’s

You either have a trust fund or you definitely still get eater eggs from your parents. Because, lets be honest, no student can afford a $24 Easter egg any other way. You also have impec-cable taste (clearly, I mean, its Haighs), which transfers onto your fashion, décor style, and your Triple J music playlist. You probably also choseto study law partially because youtake a certain pleasure in saying ‘I’m studying law’ to anyone who asks. CadburyMostly B’s

We have a sweet tooth over here. Cleary favouring quantity over qual-ity, chances are you’ve stocked up on enough Easter eggs to see you through to the mid-year exams. You are also not afraid to conform, owning that fact that you happily jam out to JB and T-Swizz, not feeling the need to pick anything wild, or out there.You probably chose to do law becauseeveryone else was doing it and it sounded cool, so why not?

Red TulipMostly C’s

You are the hipster. Like red tulip eggs, you pick out those items which others only look curiously at before choosing the more popular, familiar option. You take great pride in the fact that you are different and would never in a million years trade in the Red Tulip Easter bunny for a generic Cadbury’s one. However, if Red Tulip gains traction and becomes popular you will drop that Easter bunny faster than a corporate lawyer drops a pro bono case. Your law degree is almost definitely partnered with arts, media or international studies, to give you a release for your inner creative.

1. You take notes duringa lecture by … A. Adding to the ‘notes’ section inthe powerpoint on your macbook.B. Printing out the slideshow andwriting notes next to the slides. C. Writing fresh notes in a vintage-looking brown paperback notebook. D. Adding notes to the powerpoint on your tablet, ipad or other brand laptop. 2. Your go-to uni outfit is …

A. Cameo, Sass&Bide, GormanOR Ralph Lauren polo, chinosand boat shoes.B. Something cheap, but still fashion-able – what’s really in at the moment. C. A cool vintage knit jumper witha pair of brogues or loafers. D. Cameo or Ralph Lauren but Iprobably found it on sale somewhere (not that I’m telling).

3. When you go out you …

A. Grab a cocktail at Udaberry with your Law squad and head over toFat Controller or Transmission. B. Ask around to see what everyone else is doing, and just go with the flow. C. Only go out for undergroundgigs at bars no one else has heard of. D. Make sure you host a massive pres before joining the crowds atFat Controller or Transmission. 4. You are studying ...

A. Law/Commerce or Law/Economics. B. Straight Law. C. Law/Arts or Law/InternationalStudies. D. Law/Health Science.

5. How did you spend Easterthis year?

A. At your family’s beachhouse in Victor Harbour. B. At home with the fam. C. With your friendslistening to Triple J. D. With a friend’s or boyfriend’sfamily at their Victor Harbourbeach house. 6. In the Triple J Hottest 100, the songs you voted for ranked …

A. Almost all within the top 30.B. I couldn’t even vote formy faves T-Swizzle or Yeezus. C. I voted, but none of themeven made it into the top 100. D. I didn’t vote, but Idefinitely listened!

LindtMostly D’s

You like to keep things classy, but relatively affordable. When you turn up to a party, you avoid the goon sac like the plague, but you show off the $16 Peter Lehman bottle of white (because that’s classy). You are great at bar-gain hunting. You attend all the BNKR warehouse sales, and know exactly where to buy knock-off clothes that look almost identical. Law was prob-ably your choice because you wanted to study a prestigious degree without having to fork out the money to get a UMAT tutor and go to med school.

28 The Hilarian.

The End.

Documents

Hilarian - Issue 1 2016