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Firmness matters— now and later Being firm with your child won’t just help you maintain order now. It may help her become a more secure adult later. Research shows that kids whose parents are loving, but firm, are more likely to: • Succeed in school. • Take care of themselves. • Be emotionally well-developed. • Be happy. Why? Parents who are firm are good at setting clear boundaries. And this clarity helps their kids have a better understanding of how they’re expected to behave. Source: M. Levine, Ph.D., The Price of Privilege: How Parental Pressure and Material Advantage Are Creating a Generation of Disconnected and Deeply Unhappy Kids. ® Copyright © 2012, The Parent Institute ® , www.parent-institute.com Sample Issue Guiding Students for School Success Self-discipline is critical to your child’s success in school and in life The dreams you have for your child—and that he has for himself—depend, in part, on his self-discipline. Will he behave well? Will he get along with others? Will he be responsible? Will he overcome challenges? To encourage self-discipline: • Set limits. As your child grows, family rules will change, but they should match his age and abilities. Be sure to enforce key rules consistently. • Be clear. Instead of, “Clean your room,” say, “Make your bed and put away your clothes, toys and books.” Explain possible results: “When you’re finished, we can leave for the park” or “Items left out are taken away for a day.” • Use consequences. Kids learn from their successes and failures. Let your child make minor decisions, even if you disagree with them. He might spend his allowance too quickly, for example, and learn from this mistake. • Solve problems. Work through difficulties together. Avoid yelling and interrupting. Focus on respect and solutions. Meanwhile, give your child chances to solve problems himself, with your guidance when needed. • Be a role model. You are your child’s most important teacher. Show him exactly how you want him to act. Over time, you will see results. Source: A. Hamilton, “Raising Tomorrow’s Adults: Teaching Children Self-Control and Self-Responsibility,” University of New Hampshire Cooperative Extension, http://extension.unh.edu/family/documents/RTAConrl.htm. Your School Name Here Your Name and Title Here Your child won’t learn anything in class if she’s not there, so make attendance a priority! To ensure she’s in school every single day: • Embrace routines. Follow simple bedtime rituals at night and routines in the morning. • Prep in advance. Pack lunches and load book bags before bed. It’ll make morn- ings much less frantic. • Be firm. Unless your child is legitimately ill, insist she go to school. Manners matter! In a recent U.S. News and World Report survey, 90 percent of Americans said that lack of manners has become a big problem in society. And 78 percent felt that: • People’s manners have gotten worse in the past decade. • Poor manners have led to more violence in society. Continue to insist that your child say please and thank you at home, and he’ll transport his good man- ners to school! Source: M. Borba, Ed.D., No More Misbehavin’. Use the right approach at homework time Research shows that parent involve- ment can have either positive or negative impact at homework time. For the right approach: • Supervise, but don’t help unless you see your child is struggling. • Be aware of what your child is learning. Make supportive comments. • Guide your child through an especially tough assignment—but don’t do it for him. • Make sure your child gets extra help at school when he needs it. Source: “Homework Tips for Parents,” U.S. Department of Education.

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Page 1: Guiding Students for School Success Your School Name Here ... › pdf-samples › fbke0712-color.pdf · The Price of Privilege: How Parental Pressure and Material Advantage Are Creating

Firmness matters—now and laterBeing firm with your child won’t just help you maintain order now. It may help her become a more secure adult later. Research shows that kids whose parents are loving, but firm, are more likely to:• Succeed in school.• Take care of themselves.• Be emotionally well-developed.• Be happy.Why? Parents who are firm are good at setting clear boundaries. And this clarity helps their kids have a better understanding of how they’re expected to behave.Source: M. Levine, Ph.D., The Price of Privilege: How Parental Pressure and Material Advantage Are Creating a Generation of Disconnected and Deeply Unhappy Kids.

®

Copyright © 2012, The Parent Institute®, www.parent-institute.com

Sample Issue

Guiding Students for School Success

Self-discipline is critical to your child’s success in school and in lifeThe dreams you have for your child—and that he has for himself—depend, in part, on his self-discipline. Will he behave well? Will he get along with others? Will he be responsible? Will he overcome challenges? To encourage self-discipline:• Set limits. As your child grows, family rules

will change, but they should match his age and abilities. Be sure to enforce key rules consistently.

• Be clear. Instead of, “Clean your room,” say, “Make your bed and put away your clothes, toys and books.” Explain possible results: “When you’re finished, we can leave for the park” or “Items left out are taken away for a day.”

• Use consequences. Kids learn from their successes and failures. Let your child make minor decisions, even if you disagree with them. He might spend his allowance too quickly, for example, and learn from this mistake.

• Solve problems. Work through difficulties together. Avoid yelling and interrupting. Focus on respect and solutions. Meanwhile, give your child chances to solve problems himself, with your guidance when needed.

• Be a role model. You are your child’s most important teacher. Show him exactly how you want him to act. Over time, you will see results.

Source: A. Hamilton, “Raising Tomorrow’s Adults: Teaching Children Self-Control and Self-Responsibility,” University of New Hampshire Cooperative Extension, http://extension.unh.edu/family/documents/RTAConrl.htm.

Your School Name Here Your Name and Title Here

Your child won’t learn anything in class if she’s not there, so make attendance a priority! To ensure she’s in school every single day:• Embrace routines. Follow

simple bedtime rituals at night and routines in the morning.

• Prep in advance. Pack lunches and load book bags before bed. It’ll make morn-ings much less frantic.

• Be firm. Unless your child is legitimately ill, insist she go to school.

Manners matter!In a recent U.S. News and World Report survey, 90 percent of Americans

said that lack of manners has become a big problem in society. And 78 percent felt that:• People’s manners have gotten

worse in the past decade.• Poor manners have led to more

violence in society.Continue to insist that your child say please and thank you at home, and he’ll transport his good man-ners to school!Source: M. Borba, Ed.D., No More Misbehavin’.

Use the right approach at homework timeResearch shows that parent involve-ment can have either positive or negative impact at homework time. For the right approach:• Supervise,

but don’t help unless you see your child is struggling.

• Be aware of what your child is learning. Make supportive comments.

• Guide your child through an especially tough assignment—but don’t do it for him.

• Make sure your child gets extra help at school when he needs it.

Source: “Homework Tips for Parents,” U.S. Department of Education.

Page 2: Guiding Students for School Success Your School Name Here ... › pdf-samples › fbke0712-color.pdf · The Price of Privilege: How Parental Pressure and Material Advantage Are Creating

Spend quality time togetherThe time you spend with your child today may help shape her values tomorrow.Time together allows you to:• Learn what makes her tick.• Talk about school, friends

and goals.• Offer advice.But what is “quality” time? It’s any unrushed moment with your child. You could be in the car or washing dishes. The key is that you’re together—and you’re communicating!Source: “Where Did the Time Go? Spend Time with Your Kids Now,” A Family Guide To Keeping Youth Mentally Healthy & Drug Free.

Firm, Fair & Consistent®Guiding Students for School Success

Published nine times a year, September-May. Available in English and Spanish. First Subscription

School Building Rate: $209. Additional versions after 1st, add $119 each. Includes full print reproduction

and electronic distribution rights to the parents at your school. Subscription begins the date order is processed.

Call for school district rates.1-800-756-5525

The Parent Institute®, a division of NIS, Inc. www.parent-institute.com

Copyright © 2012, The Parent Institute®, www.parent-institute.com

Sample Issue®

Q:My fourth grader seems awfully casual about disregarding

the rules sometimes—both at home and at school. How

can I teach her to be more respectful of them?

A:The answer is simple: By demonstrating respect yourself!

Remember, when it comes to nurturing your child’s character,

actions speak much louder than words. So showing her what respect

for the rules (and anything else) looks like will be much more

powerful than telling her.

To model respect for your child:

• Follow your own rules. Do you

insist on no swearing at home, but

then start cursing when your favorite

football team fumbles the ball? Stop.

Your child won’t take the rules

seriously if you don’t.

• Support the school’s rules. Be sure

your child follows the school dress

code. Go over the code with your child and make sure she under-

stands it. If there’s a “no gum” or “no cell phone” policy, insist

that she not bring those things to class. Show her that you and the

school are partners in her education.

• Obey traffic laws. You might not agree with the rules of the road,

but that doesn’t give you the right to break them. So the next time

you’re tempted to ignore that “no turn on red” sign, reconsider.

Your child may be watching and, if so, she’s getting the wrong

message loud and clear.

• Be honest. If the kids’ fare only goes up to age 10, and your child

is 11, don’t lie about it. Doing so tells her that it’s okay to break

the rules when there’s a payoff in it for you.

Teach responsibility for technology useBuilding responsibility can be confusing in today’s high-tech world. Kids often want privileges—such as having a Facebook account—long before they’re ready. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that parents:• Learn about technology. Understand the features

and platforms kids are using. Many, including Facebook, are not for kids under 13.

• Monitor technology. Keep the computer in a spot you can supervise. Ask, “What did you do online today?” Set limits.

• Encourage good judgment. Kids should imagine the whole world can see messages they send or post. At the same time, kids must strive to protect their privacy. More information is available at http://safetynet.aap.org/.

Source: “Talking to Kids and Teens about Social Media and Texting,” American Academy of Pediatrics.

Are your penalties out of date? Time-outs may have been fine when your child was in preschool. But now that he’s older, you might curb his poor behavior with “bigger kid” consequences such as:• Having him come inside if he’s

playing outdoors.• Taking away his music for a

while.• Suspending phone privileges for

a time. Source: S. Steelsmith, Go to Your Room! Consequences that Teach.