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Arts, Culture, Music and Irreverence in the South West, UK
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TheFlying
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01Vol 2Apr/May
FREE!the
The Flying PostApr/May 2012
PoliticsArts
MusicCulture
Arms Trade TreatyGil Scott-HeronNexus - 9Post Dubstep Fictators + More!™
Nostalgiaissue
the
When we took on the Flying Post project just over a year ago, we targeted
exponential growth. Seven issues down the line, and that ‘growth’ is now manifest
in physical form. The very magazine you hold in your hands has upsized, and we’re
proud to be able to bring you even more of the interesting words and elegant
pictures that prompted you (we hope) to pick us up in the first place. In truth, our
editorial team have acted a little like slave-drivers (or Tesco-Jobcentre synergists,
as they’re now called) to get the content in shape for this edition, but once again
our team have produced something truly special, with their wonderful design
work for this issue and, indeed, our new website. Our political contributor Mark
Arnold opens the issue with a campaigning piece about the, hopefully, soon-to-be-
signed international Arms Trade Treaty. This is a global issue which has received
an appalling lack of exposure in the mainstream media, and we’ve sought to bring
it firmly to your attention. Various ponderments on nostalgia and its uses and
gratifications follow, in an edition which has adhered devotedly to our ‘Nostalgia &
Anticipation’ theme. Indeed, the theme itself has been captured in image form by
our Photography Director in a selection of ‘Futuristic Pictures with a Vintage Feel’.
We are extremely proud to be able to publish a posthumous interview with the great
Gil Scott-Heron, in a candid piece which celebrates the heights and tragic demise of
a truly remarkable man. The rest of our music section, however, has one eye firmly
on the future, with a piece considering what has been coined the ‘Post-Dubstep’
movement, and an interview with an emerging exemplar of the genre, Manchester-
based D/R/U/G/S. Of course, no Flying Post would be complete without our ever
irreverent review section, and this month’s ‘Fictator’ – or (Future) Dictator – review,
provides a wry observation of dictators past, and a satirical forecast of the dictators
of tomorrow. Enjoy, dear reader, and remember us…
TFP
Managing EditorGustavo Navarro [email protected] [email protected] Director Robert [email protected] Director / Designer Nia [email protected] Editor: Dan [email protected] Rossi
Advertising To request a media pack contact:[email protected]
Front Cover: Robert Darchwww.robertdarch.com
www.theflyingpost.com
Contributors: Mark Arnold, Jessica Lennan, Patrick Cullum, Jack Cuncliffe, Len Brown, Nathan Blaker, Simon Peplow. Special Thanks: The Costume Box, Trash Dollys, Exeter Phoenix, No Guts No Glory.
The Flying post welcomes all editorial submissions. No responsibility can be assumed for unsolicited materials. All letter and submissions will be treated for publication and copyright purposes and subject to TFP’s right to edit and comment editorially. All rights reserved on entire content; nothing may be reproduced in whole or in part without written permission from the publisher. Opinions expressed in articles are those of the author. Any similarities between persons or places mentioned or alluded to in the fiction and real places or persons living are purely coincidental.
02 on pondERing nostalgia03 aRms tRadE tREaty 07 jack's ways oF thE woRd08 nExus - 912 ’86 intERviEw with gil scott-heron 15 post dubstEp 18 d/R/u/g/s19 thE REviEw - FictatoRs
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TheFlying
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I recently read an academic article exploring the concept
of nostalgia as a ‘Resource for the Self ’, which cited
Humphrey Bogart’s romantic declaration to Ingrid
Bergman at the conclusion of Casablanca that at least
they’ll “always have Paris”, as a perfect example of
our human capacity for fondly revisiting past events
and taking solace from such moments. Granted,
Bogart’s character Rick was probably still a bit irked
by Bergman’s turning up with her estranged husband,
but the sentiment remained intact: despite their tragic
and inevitable separation at the film’s denouement,
the memory of their tender time spent together in the
shadow of the Eiffel Tower would prove a sufficient
tonic for the pain.
I myself have been described, in somewhat less poetic
terms, as a ‘nostalgia-whore’; in that my obsession with
all things passed – be it an idyllic childhood memory
or a painful revisiting of past mistakes – has often
come to define me. Interestingly, both of these aspects
of reminiscence play crucial roles in the differing
interpretations of the plausible benefits nostalgia has for
us as a species.
So, for the purposes of this article, I think it pertinent
to differentiate between the denotative significance of
the word ‘nostalgia’, and the act of simply obsessing
about the past. To be nostalgic implies that a certain
yearning, a level of sentimentality, is present when
thinking back to ‘a better time’. Obsessing about the
past, for me, implies a far more torturous process; a
process in which one neurotically torments themselves
for no palpable benefit. In Eckhart Tolle’s The Power of
Now, he posits that you “cannot truly forgive yourself or
others as long as you derive your sense of self from the
past.” Although admittedly, considering that the book is
specifically about surrendering to the present moment
and “rendering the past powerless”, it’s possible that he
is a little biased about his views on nostalgia.
Alternatively, the aforementioned academic article
proposes that “nostalgia functions to restore positive
moods and feelings of social connectedness [and]
confers more direct benefits to the self by amplifying
explicit self-esteem and buffering individuals from the
negative impact of existential threats.” Comprehensive.
But how, really, does nostalgia benefit us as a species?
Are we the only organic life forms on the planet who
derive a sense of pleasure from the past? What about
elephants?
Outside of the realms of time travel, surely our only
legitimate way to relive events is via nostalgia, or in more
pragmatic terms, through ‘episodic memory’. Celebrated
cognitive neuroscientist Endel Tulving, asserts that
episodic memory (or in this case nostalgia) is a form
of consciousness that allows people to think about the
subjective time in which they live and ‘mentally travel’ in
that time. This presents us with a number of benefits; in
sentimental terms, it can prompt us to revisit the specific
emotions felt when listening to a loved song (Bonobo’s
entire Days to Come album reminds me of train
journeys to Brighton when visiting my girlfriend during
her first year of uni, circa 2008), whereas in semantic
terms, it also tells us that playing in traffic or spitting on
old people (however fun this may be) is usually an ill-
advised pastime.
I’d rather focus on the sentimental. As a species
we have long used the world around us to prompt
memories passed. I myself cannot walk past various
local landmarks without attaching some mischievous
adolescent story to them, and if those landmarks weren’t
there it’s not unreasonable to suggest that the memories
would fade rather quicker. These landmarks, in much
the same way as photographs, are symbols of our
past, and their absence would inhibit our capacity for
nostalgia and, thus, our capacity for truly enjoying the
memories that have been pivotal in the shaping of us.
We are bound by physics and the fundamental laws of
time to never experience the same thing twice; we may
come close, and feel and do things similarly, but once a
moment has passed it is, principally, gone forever. How
lucky we are then, to be able to look back and, if only for
a short while, revisit fonder times.
To conclude? This article has not set out to prove,
disprove or generally assert anything; it is merely a
ponderment. But one thing, I think, has been made
clear in this jumbled assortment of words: nostalgia is
a wondrous and unique emotive device. It sets us apart
as a species…maybe not from animals (elephants), but
certainly from rocks. It’s said that ‘those who choose
to ignore history are doomed to repeat it’, and our
experiences – good and bad (in fact, especially the bad
ones) – are what come to shape us as people. A person
without past is a person without identity: like an outlined
drawing absent of colour, and it’s necessary that we
reflect on the past and which paths were trodden before
arriving at our current mental and physical locations. In
short: anticipate, be hopeful and look forward, for there
is no mystery greater than the future, but it is worth
remembering that there is no use looking forwards if you
haven’t first looked back.
on Pondering Nostalgia“ A r e w e t h e o n l y o r g a n i c l i f e f o r m s o n t h e p l a n e t w h o d e r i v e a s e n s e o f p l e a s u r e f r o m t h e p a s t ? W h a t
a b o u t e l e p h a n t s ? ”
words by oliver tolkien
W e m u s t s u p p o r t a “ b u l l e t p r o o f ” A r m s T r a d e T r e a t y
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2011 was a watershed year for global democracy and human rights. Sparked by the flames of Tunisian street vendor Mohamed Bouazizi’s self-immolation, revolution swept across the Middle East and North Africa, casting regime after regime into disarray, ousting Ben Ali in Tunisia and Mubarak in Egypt, igniting civil war in Libya and popular uprisings in Bahrain, Syria and Yemen, as well as major protests in nearly every country in the region.
2012 will prove equally historic as the United Nations (UN) convenes to sign an international Arms Trade Treaty (ATT) to regulate the flow of weapons and ammunition around the world. Incredibly, there are already international treaties in place to regulate the global trade in bananas and dinosaur bones, but not the deadly trade in guns, tanks, bombs and bullets (two of which, reassuringly, are produced each year for every person on the planet). “Concluding a strong treaty in July will be a crucial step towards a safer world”, said Jeff Abramson, coordinator of the Control Arms secretariat, in a statement acknowledging the Control Arms coalition’s recent Nobel Peace Prize nomination. Control Arms is a global coalition of NGOs and civil society actors that has forged the path towards an ATT since 2003.
Russia and China’s recent veto of international attempts to impose an arms embargo on Syria, in the face of what the UN now deems crimes against humanity being inflicted on the civilian population by Assad’s regime, poignantly reinforces the profound importance of establishing a treaty in July that holds governments accountable to their obligations under international humanitarian law, and categorically bans the sale of weapons to repressive or aggressive regimes.
Why is an ATT important?
Every day, millions of people suffer from the direct and indirect consequences of the irresponsible arms trade: thousands are killed, others are injured, many are raped, and/or forced to flee from their homes, while many others have to live under constant threat of weapons. The poorly regulated global trade in conventional arms and ammunition fuels conflict, poverty and human rights abuses.
(Control Arms)
On average more than one person is killed every minute as a result of armed violence. At the end of 2008, 26 million people were internally displaced by armed conflicts. About 60% of human rights violations documented by Amnesty International have involved the use of small arms and light weapons. All of the top six countries of origin of refugees in 2008 are locations of armed conflict, and child soldiers have been actively involved in armed conflict in government forces or non-state armed groups in 19 countries or
territories since 2004. Armed conflict also costs Africa around $18 billion a year (roughly $300 billion between 1990 and 2005).
Why is that our problem?
“I don’t really fill my mind much with what one set of foreigners is doing to another.” - Former Defence Minister Alan Clark, when questioned about the genocide in East Timor, perpetrated by Suharto’s Indonesian regime, using British weapons and fighter jets. The indiscriminate massacre and systematic torture and starvation of East Timor’s indigenous population ended in 1999, by which time over a third of the population were dead.
Uncomfortably, the UK is one of the foremost gunrunners in the world. From concentration camps in East Timor to the killing fields of Sri Lanka, from the skies over Gaza to the streets of Bahrain, British arms have continually been used for external aggression and internal repression around the world throughout modern times. Our current government has been determined to push more weapons than ever, as Defence Equipment Minister Peter Luff told an arms expo in June 2010: “There will be a very, very, very heavy ministerial commitment to arms sales. There is a sense that in the past we were rather embarrassed about exporting defence products. There is no such embarrassment in this government.” Indeed, David Cameron shamelessly toured the Gulf accompanied by representatives from eight arms dealers this time last year, claiming Britain had “nothing to be ashamed of ” for selling weapons to Middle Eastern despots whilst pro-democracy protestors were being murdered in the streets. During questioning about the use of British weaponry to crack down on peaceful protestors, Business Secretary Vince Cable candidly told the Commons committee on arms export controls: “We do trade with governments that are not democratic and have bad human rights records... We do business with repressive governments and there’s no denying that.” According to Campaign Against Arms Trade (CAAT): “The UK Government’s 2010 Human Rights Annual Report identified 26 ‘countries of concern’. In that year, the UK approved arms export licences to 16 of these”.
CAAT reports the sale of tear gas, sniper rifles, shotguns, crowd control armament and small arms ammunition, amongst an arsenal of other weaponry, to Bahrain and Libya throughout 2010. Saudi Arabia, our biggest arms client, sent British armoured vehicles to Bahrain to crush protests, and it’s highly likely they also used British fighter jets to commit war crimes in Yemen. We continued to sell a variety of weapons, components and ammunition to Bahrain and Saudi Arabia during the 2011 crackdowns. Looking back at 2009, CAAT highlights our arms deals with Sri Lanka, who committed war crimes against Tamil civilians trapped in conflict zones during the end of the civil war, and Israel, who “almost certainly” used British weaponry in Operation Cast Lead, during which the UN concluded that Israel deliberately targeted civilians. Despite both countries being ‘countries of concern’ for human rights, the UK continues to supply weapons to Sri Lanka and Israel.
We should care about pushing for an effective ATT because
we should want our government to stop arming tyrants and abetting war crimes, and we should want other governments to stop too. We follow events in Syria with profound sadness and impotence, and must share the belief that there should be international mechanisms in place to force Russia to stop arming the regime. Despite Mr Clark’s indifference, “what one set of foreigners is doing to another” should mean something to us – especially when what a government is “doing” is murdering, torturing and raping its own or neighbouring people. This should matter whether or not they are using weapons made in Britain, which they often are.
How would an ATT work?
“An effective ATT would be based on a simple principle: no transfers of weapons likely to be used for violations of international law.” (Oxfam)
An international ATT would be a legally binding agreement by all states to use the same standards when assessing whether or not to export arms. Each state would remain in control of their own arms exports, but would be obliged under international law to undertake a transparent risk assessment on all weapons controlled under the treaty, by the standards of the treaty. It would then be illegal for them to supply arms to countries that don’t pass the risk assessment.
Control Arms identifies several key elements that are necessary for a comprehensive and effective ATT. Firstly, the treaty must hold governments accountable to their obligations under international humanitarian law: it must ensure that sales of arms to where they might be used for human rights violations, internal repression or external aggression are banned categorically. Secondly, the treaty must be all-inclusive: it must cover all weapons, all transfers and all transactions. Thirdly, the treaty must be workable and enforceable: it must include clear details of implementation, must mandate full transparency in all transactions and reports, and must include mechanisms for monitoring and enforcing compliance, including the use of sanctions and international judicial instruments.
How would it be enforced?
This will still be on the table in July. Control Arms envisage a treaty that would be incorporated into the national law and regulations of every ratifying nation, and reinforced through rules such as regular public reporting. It would then be illegal under national and international law for any government to ignore the treaty’s criteria when supplying arms. Any decisions that break the terms of the treaty could then be challenged and potentially overturned in national courts. Under the proposed treaty, governments would be required to report their arms sales openly and transparently, which would lead to greater public, parliamentary and international scrutiny. As with any treaty, there would be international controls ranging from diplomatic pressure (including sanctions) to legal action, right up to the International Court of Justice.
incredibly, there are already international treaties in place to regulate the global trade in bananas and dinosaur bones, but not the deadly trade in guns, tanks, bombs and bullets
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What can I do?
We need to put popular pressure on our government to champion a strong ATT. Whilst the UK government was once a leader in the process, Control Arms warns in a Briefing for MPs:
There has been a growing perception among other states that the UK Government has reassessed its role… and decided to step back. This is affecting other supporter states, which look to the UK for leadership, and consider the UK’s positioning on ATT issues as a barometer for global consensus. Any indication that the UK is reducing its support for the process could encourage the treaty’s opponents in their efforts to block progress.
(Control Arms, Parliamentarian’s Guide to the Arms Trade Treaty)
In response to thousands of emails and letters he has received regarding the ATT, Ed Miliband noted “that some have suggested that the Coalition Government is not prioritising [the ATT process] nor playing the global leadership role taken by the previous Labour
Government.” He also promises to continue to put pressure on them to do so. Nick Clegg has recently spoken out on the issue, writing in the Independent: “Internationally, we’ll lead the charge for a robust, legally-binding treaty, covering all conventional weapons.” David Cameron, however, remains deafeningly silent on the issue.
Popular pressure from civil society has delivered some real success at the recent final ATT Preparatory Committee (PrepCom) in New York:
We’re happy to report that civil society access was just one of several areas where the UK Government team significantly upped its game this week. Working hard, and working the room, the UK was vocal and engaged and made a number of strong statements.
(Amnesty International UK)
This is positive news, but there’s still an extremely long way to go. Another outcome of the PrepCom was that final negotiations in July will comprise a mixture of consensus and majority voting. This means that it will be possible to achieve an effective treaty in the
face of opposition, but this will require political determination from the UK. Write to your local MP, as well as David Cameron, Nick Clegg and Ed Miliband, urging them to speak out on and fight for a robust Treaty. Visit www.amnesty.org.uk (where they have template letters and emails) and www.controlarms.org to find out more and take action.
Since this issue of The Flying Post is about looking back as well as forwards, let’s take some inspiration from a rare triumph of British justice. For decades, Britain was “the single
most important supplier of arms to the [Suharto] regime in Indonesia, which [was] responsible for the worst genocide since the Nazi Holocaust”. During the escalating atrocities four women – Andrea Needham, Joanna Wilson, Lotta Kronlid and Angie Zelter – took matters into their own hands and, armed with hammers and banners, broke into a British Aerospace facility and disabled several Hawk fighter jets that they knew were destined for shipment to Indonesia. They caused nearly £2 million damage, but were all acquitted on the grounds that they were using reasonable force to prevent a crime (namely, genocide).
This year we don’t need to take nearly so much initiative to help create a safer world for future generations. We have a once in a lifetime opportunity to secure an effective ATT, and if we don’t keep the pressure on our government to fight for a bulletproof treaty, we may never get another chance.
we should care about pushing for an effective att because we should want our government to stop arming tyrants and abetting war crimes, and we should want other g o v e r n m e n t s to stop too
words by mark arnold
Photography by Jessica Lennanwww.jessicalennan.com
Jackswaysof the
word
ostalgia as a word was coined in the late 17th
century by medical student Johannes Hofer to describe
a malaise also known as ‘Swiss homesickness’. It is
constructed from a combination of the Greek words
nostos and algia, roughly translated as an ache for
homecoming. Swiss mercenaries fighting abroad would
miss their homeland such that hearing Swiss music
would make them indolent, disabling them of strength
with a severe longing for home. Because of this, the
singing of kurehin (a horn melody used when herding
cattle through the beautiful Swiss Alps) was banned,
with the King of France once losing a whole battalion
to the bucolic lure of the horn, the pied piper of their
imagination leading them to a risky escape home. This
‘disorder of the imagination’ theory lost credence as the
Swiss believed it cast them negatively, so the idea was
put forward (by the Swiss, incidentally) that the cause
of their ‘lethargy’ was the change in air pressure after
the descent from their mountain homes, an idea which
Easyjet have today employed as an excuse to explain the
absence of all human beings on their service and the
soulless, ‘lethargic’ clones who serve in their place.
Nostalgia is often associated with a yearning for a
culture that exists no more, rather than for a particular
homeland, or perhaps for a time of innocence; a time
where society was more cohesive, or often for a time
where an individual was in their ripening prime. A song
or a picture, a smell, even, can trigger intense feelings of
nostalgia and it is considered an emotive process of little
harm – perhaps even a self indulgent pleasure.
Nostalgia is partly to blame for an over romanticising
of the past, and a mistrust of change and the future,
every generation since time immemorial has stated
with unequivocal conviction that ‘in the good old days
everything was better. Everything.’ Even some who lived
through the Second World War would have us believe
life was better then, despite it plainly being far, far worse:
they were being bombed, living on powdered eggs and
everyone was a bit racist. Maybe nostalgia is simply a
yearning for a time when the world was yours?
It seems to be an increasingly conventional wisdom that
the past is somehow more important than the present;
the passing of years sanctifies its significance along
with the constant eulogising by each generation which
perpetuates the ‘myth of the golden age’, one that is
perhaps completely individualistic. There is a lot of
negativity about the present, but it is all we have, so let
us make every moment as worthwhile as possible. Then
when we are older, we can reminisce about the glory
days when the world knew its place, chocolate bars were
bigger and ‘multiculturalism’ was a blissfully distant
concept. Expectantly waiting to be nostalgic. Doesn’t
mean it’s worthwhile.
n
words by jack cuncliffeIllustration by Patrick Cullum www.patrickcullum.com
n e x u s - 9
Photography by Robert Darch - www.robertdarch.com | Clothing designed by Bee Watson at The Costume Box - www.thecostumebox.net | Modelled by TrashDollys - www.chamostrashdollys.com
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G i l S c o t t - H e r o n
len Brown recalls meeting gil scott-heron in a hazy west-london hotel room in 1986.
Some men are born great. Some have greatness thrust upon them. Some are just lucky bastards, in the right place at the right time, to bear witness to the words and works of great men.
Gil Scott-Heron played an important part in my political education. As a middle class teenager brought up in the predominantly-white North East of England – where racism flourished in the early Seventies – my knowledge of black African and black American politics was sketchy to say the least. In truth, I had a slim grasp of non-white, non-European, even non-British politics until I got a copy of Gil’s ‘From South Africa to South Carolina’ in 1976.
As you do, when you’re young and you fall in love with extraordinary voices making extraordinary music, I went back and gorged on his earlier work. Mind-blowing jazz-meets-soul-meets-blues-meets-poetry (Bluesology, he called it) such as ‘The Revolution Will Not Be Televised’, ‘Winter in America’ and, best of all, ‘Lady Day and John Coltrane’ which beautifully articulated the sustaining power of great art.
Later I’d treasure a copy of ‘Small Talk At 125th And Lenox’, his fiery breakthrough recording from 1970,
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“ I don’t get i nto any of that Behold the world of G i l Scott-Heron sh i t . I’m just say ing , Here’s
some th ings that have been bother ing me , they may have been bother ing you too’. I t’s just a
sens i t i v i ty .”
ferociously attacking inequality, prejudice, military aggression in Vietnam and poor government. Because of Gil, I first began to understand what really was going on. He led me to the Last Poets and Sweet Honey in the Rock, made me listen to Billie Holiday and John Coltrane and Nina Simone, and taught me to read Langston Hughes, Gwendolyn Brooks, James Baldwin and Steve Biko’s I Write What I Like.
And so it came to pass, in the summer of 1986, that I spent a memorable afternoon in the company of Gil Scott-Heron.
He’d landed in London a few hours earlier, en route to Peter Gabriel’s WOMAD festival. He was jet-lagged, burnt out, struggling to sleep, when this young NME journalist knocked on his hotel room door, humbly seeking an interview.
Sat up on his bed, bare-chested like a warrior, drawing power from a smoking spliff, Gil was soon in full flight; at his most articulate, opinionated and finger-pointing best; a scene perfectly reflected by photographer A.J. Barratt.
Gil was only 37 then, and had been on the radical road for 16 years; a mobile pioneer of pop with a conscience; a man whose portentous songs and crusades against inhumanity had elevated him, in my eyes, to the status of prophet.
Since the early 70s he’d spoken out against the horrors of heroin (‘Home is Where the Hatred is’); warned of the energy-sapping, brain-numbing goggle box (‘The Revolution Will Not Be Televised’); and called for solidarity with the struggle against apartheid in South Africa (‘Johannesburg’). ‘Angel Dust’ had alerted the American media to the growing
PCP abuse among the young; ‘H2O Blues’ tackled Nixon’s entanglement in Watergate; while ‘The Bottle’ fired the campaign to combat alcohol abuse.
These were just the hot songs, the issue songs, for which Gil had rightly been hailed. Check through the extensive back catalogue and you’ll find a whole host of fine compositions – some political, some danceable, many passionate, all emotional – to match your every mood.
Our meeting took place years before Nelson Mandela’s release and the birth of the Rainbow Nation, and Gil was always keen to talk about the situation in South Africa. His track ‘Johannesburg’ had demanded increased economic pressure on the apartheid regime as far back as 1975, and he clearly felt political progress was too damn slow.
“It looked as if the sanctions question would never even come to the attention of the political powers-that-be. Even when limited sanctions came I thought it was a great step from no recognition, no acknowledgement of the problem. Hell, I thought it should have happened ten years ago, but often it takes as long to get straight as it did to get crooked. Now it’s our responsibility to keep the pressure on.
“Often even if we think we’re right, if it’s moving too slowly we abandon it, and politicians play on that. They think if they bat an issue around in the back room, eventually that issue will leave the front pages and the constituencies will cool out. Let’s make it as hard for them to deal with it, as it is for us. It’s very hard for me to look at South Africa and feel that, as an American, some of my money is being used to sustain that.”
In 1986, South Africa was the focus of his attention; he’d recently contributed to the ‘Sun City’ album and made regular appearances with the growing ranks of Artists Against Apartheid.
“I’m always pleased when I see members of our family – artists, athletes, entertainers – take some sort of stand that brings them back into the world. In general it’s as if we live on some other fucking planet and just come down for shows. Artists are always claiming they’re so fucking sensitive, but we aren’t if we cut ourselves off because of record sales or the number of tickets we might sell.”
One of the familiar media jibes made at Artists Against Apartheid, I reminded him, was that audiences at gigs seemed to be predominantly white. He took a deep, self-controlling breath before answering me.
“Okay, but there’s some black people over here with problems that nobody’s attending to. Maybe they looked at the problems they had and said, ‘Yes, South Africa’s one but also getting these groceries for tomorrow is a problem, maybe I better save the ticket money ‘cause the kid needs some milk’. There’s economics between them and getting to the gig, and it has a lot to do with how well educated, or well informed you are.
If you don’t have a TV or a radio, if you don’t have the money to buy the newspaper then perhaps you are a little cut off. This may make you look insensitive but what it really makes you look is poor. And they’re part of the people
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we would hope to help. South Africa has become a priority because it’s actually reached the stage of people killing one another. I would obviously go and try and plug up the dyke where it’s leaking before I go and work on the place where it looks like it’s gonna leak.”
Many of Gil Scott-Heron’s songs had promoted “The Change”, the bloodless revolution, in America and South Africa. I bravely suggested that, although we all wanted apartheid to be dismantled with limited bloodshed, under Afrikaan ideology, sadly many white South Africans would never see the black man as their equal.
“Well they’ll see it goddamnit before this is over,” he replied angrily. “They’ll either see it because it’s real and it’s necessary or they’ll see it goddamnit because it’s a bloodbath and their fellow men are getting killed all around them.”
His uncompromising reluctance to play it safe would always make it difficult to classify Gil Scott-Heron. Songwriter? Poet? Singer? Musician? Novelist (The Vulture and Nigger Factory)? Categories and pigeonholes never conveyed the simplicity of the man’s objectives or the diversity of his talent. Just try and find his work in record stores: “Fifteen years to be misce-fucking-llaneous!” he laughed.
“I like to write songs about issues, not because they became headlines but because they could become headlines. I don’t write them after a crisis and say, ‘Damn wasn’t that something about South Africa’. The idea’s not that everyone who heard my song would decide the way that I have but that, at least, they’ve got another way of looking at that problem. We just make suggestions, other people make laws.”
Gil would certainly sidestep the radical/militant/extremist presentation, arguing that his politics were really just common sense. It’s something he picked up from his grandmother, who brought him up and who featured in his early songs.
“She was an issues woman, looking at things in terms of what’s fair and not fair. It’s a question of looking in your heart for the truth and not seeing whether your favourite politician goes for a particular issue. On a right and wrong type of basis, this is how my grandmother raised me, to not
sit around and wait for people to guess what’s on my mind, I was gonna have to say it.” He would return to Lillie Scott fourteen years later, on his final collection, ‘I’m New Here’, most memorably ‘On Coming from a Broken Home’. Her death, when he was only 12, had a huge impact on his life.
But if the sensitive streak came from the maternal Scott side then the tough talking, the uncompromising stance – some called it stubbornness – came from his Dad’s.
“My father’s family, the Heron’s, they were known for two things down in Jamaica – fighting and football.” Gil’s dad played for Celtic; the first black footballer to grace the Scottish game.
Must’ve been hard, I suggested, for a black player in 1950s Glasgow?
“Not really. Then it was just like now. If you kicked a ball in the net, fuck what colour you are!”
The Scott-Herons often appeared in Gil’s early melancholic moments, and personally I’ve got a soft spot between the ribs for songs like ‘Save The Children’ or ‘Did You Hear What They Said’ or the shattering ‘Pieces of A Man’. And, rising high and proud thanks to Brian Jackson’s uplifting flute, there’s ‘Winter in America’; Gil’s coldest, sharpest demolition of the American Dream.
Sadly, this is too easy to say with hindsight, but at the time of our meeting in July 1986, Gil Scott-Heron was already struggling against other enemies, much closer to home. A proud principled man, he had been in dispute with Arista America since 1982’s ‘Moving Targets’ album, and apart from ‘Sun City’, work on Richie Havens’ A Matter Of Struggle movie and POW (a film about black Vietnam vets), his only recent vinyl output had been the anti-Reagan rap hit ‘Re-Ron’ (’84) produced by Bill Laswell.
“There’s now a question over who’s going to be in charge of my projects,” he told me, with a sad deep, Old Testament growl. “I say I am and they say someone else is. So there won’t be any work done on projects of mine until I’m placed back in charge. ‘Re-Ron’ sounded like Bill Laswell, which is fine for Bill Laswell, but not for Gil Scott-Heron. Everything else they can have – the money, the executive producer credits, the album cover, all that shit’s up for grabs. But what the music sounds like – I gotta have that.”
He would always argue against going back and recreating past glories. He constantly updated his sound, moved towards the next audience, and looked towards the next generation. Hence the ground-breaking rap (first used by Gil in ’74 on ‘The Revolution Will Not Be Televised’) of ‘B-Movie’ and ‘Re-Ron’. Even ‘Whitey on the Moon’, his grim contrast between ghetto poverty and the costly space programme, had been modernised into ‘Space Shuttle’, “putting the fear back in atmosphere”.
Typically, he would only be creative on his own terms; on his own terms or not at all.
“It’s really between me and the marketing people, because they have a history of being wrong about my music, they never anticipated any of my songs being hits. In America
the mentality is that if you have a hit, they expect you to do the same thing again, repeating the formula. But my style has been to explore the different aspects of black music, to continually explore and develop.
“When Leonardo da Vinci did the Mona Lisa, did he go right back and do the Mona Lucy, just ‘cos he had a hit?”
Following his death last May, at the age of only 62, it’s hard not to feel cheated. I caught him live in London several times in the late Eighties and Nineties, notably at the Town & Country Club and the Jazz Café, but he seemed to be ageing fast and the voice became less sure, more slurred. Sometimes he didn’t show at all. Despite his strength of character, he struggled with drink problems, became addicted to cocaine and spent years checking in and out of prisons and rehab centres. In 2008 he confirmed he was HIV positive, which made him more vulnerable to the pneumonia that probably killed him.
Despite having produced thirteen studio albums in the first twelve years of his recording career up to 1982, he released only two more in the remaining 29 years of his life. These both contain glorious, moving moments, notably ‘Message to the Messengers’ on 1994’s ‘Spirits’, and ‘Me and the Devil’ on XL Recording’s ‘I’m New Here’ in 2010. Perhaps with better management or guidance, or more luck, he’d have continued to be prolific; an influential poet, commentator and force of nature. ‘I’m New Here’ will now have to serve, musically, as his last will and testament, but thankfully Canongate are bringing out his long-delayed memoir The Last Holiday in early 2012.
My final memory of Gil Scott-Heron takes me back to that West London hotel room in July 1986. He’d talked for hours about the state of the world, American poetry, the running of record companies, Scottish football and South African politics. But, in the end, I made the mistake of confusing the man with the message and – in an awkward expression of affection and admiration – I dared suggest that he was some sort of prophet. Flattery got me nowhere.
“I don’t get into any of that ‘Behold the world of Gil Scott-Heron shit’,” he replied firmly. “I’m just saying, ‘Here’s some things that have been bothering me, they may have been bothering you too’. It’s just a sensitivity. If I had second sight I’d be doing better than I am now, hell I’d have had a thousand dollars on the World Cup, on the Derby, I’d be checking the steeplechasers everybody…”
Prophet or not, some might argue that tragically the bastards eventually ground Gil Scott-Heron down. But they didn’t win, they couldn’t win. He lived to see the end of apartheid, he lived to see a black man in the White House, and his creativity and music will last as long as this planet does. Wherever you are Gil Scott-Heron, may your gods be good to you and your demons finally defeated. What a man and, Jesus, what a life; lived with passion, poetry and controlled rage.
H is uncompromis i ng reluctance to play i t safe
would always make i t d iff i cult to class ify G i l
Scott-Heron . Categor ies and p i geonholes never
conveyed the s impl i c i ty of the man’s objec-
t ives or the
d ivers i ty of h i s talent . Just try and f ind h i s
work in record stores : “F ifteen years to be
m isce-fuck ing-llaneous !” he laughed .
words by len brownPhoto Credit: A. J. Barratt
w e ' r e a l l n e w h e r e
i s i t w o r t h w h i l e d i s c u s s i n g a n e w s o u n d b y d e f i n i n g i t i n t o a n e w g e n r e ? o r a r e t h e a c t s t h e m s e l v e s m o r e i m p o r t a n t t h a n d e f i n i t i o n ? t f p l o o k s i n t o t h e e m e r g i n g a c t s o f ‘ p o s t - D u b s t e p ’
year ago a frenzied discussion stirred amongst fans and critics. Out of this commotion, a new genre was born; a minimal, sparse sound that emerged from
the Dubstep movement – some have come to call it Post-Dubstep. The genre has an intrinsic connection to its predecessor, but it is the melodic & melancholic
sister of dubstep. The discussions that took place over 2011, though at times pointless, have lead to define the genre more clearly. A year later, the term already has
a clearly defined musical boundary with an umbrella of its own particular artists (Mount Kimbie, Burial, Joy Orbison, Fantastic Mr. Fox, Dark Sky, James Blake,
Kode9) and labels (Hyperdub, Hessle Audio).
Like all good things music is fleeting, especially in an age where the internet is a catalyst for how fast a concept & sound can grow, explode and die out in a matter
of months; it wouldn’t be long before the discussion changed. The debate around post-dubstep still exists, but it has now veered into what direction the new genre
is heading.
Dubstep was the linchpin sound of 2011. The year was defined by the transition of the genre into the mainstream. Dubstep, described in general terms as dark,
instrumental music, with overwhelming bass lines and reverberant drum patterns (occasionally bordering on brown noise), has been sampled by a number of
different artists, even gaining a popular following in America through its own category of Brostep. The meteoric rise of the marmite figure Skrillex as an advocate
of the genre has lead many to conclude that dubstep has run its course, with the familiar accusation that the sound has ‘sold out’. How can an immaterial entity sell-
out? However, the question remains: has this sound, which sometime in the noughties was unlike anything you’d ever heard, now become stale? An obvious reply
would be that the industry giants have capitalised on the recent momentum of the genre and have turned it into a repetitive, meaningless, money-making scheme
and left it for dead before moving on to suck the life out of the next great thing. Of course, that is a rather extreme view on the matter. The fact is though, that
the beats and samples once used almost exclusive in dubstep, have started to bleed across a number of genres. Just look at the BBC Sound of the Year list of 2010,
2011 & 2012, to see how many artists featured were either proponents or directly influenced by dubstep.
awords by gustavo navarro
Image Credit: Whitey Fisk
Perhaps it was over-sampling, or the need for something
different that lead the genre to veer in a different direction.
Around the same time that dubstep artists were rapidly
filling large venues, The xx released their debut album, in
what was a possibly game changing move. In 2010 Mount
Kimbie released Crooks and Lovers – the group’s debut
album, and the first to be described as Post-Dubstep. Soon,
a bunch of artists were being categorised under this genre,
and it was only a matter of time before inconsistencies
started appearing and very obvious differences between
this new ‘collective’ of artists became apparent.
The Post-Dubstep scene now finds itself at a crossroads.
Various artists are following different paths and, though
these are not disparate paths, the differences are perceptible
enough for a need to separate them into their own musical
sub-categories. In one hand you have people like Burial,
James Blake and Mount Kimbie producing slow, melodic
beats, whose sound triggers a nostalgia-like melancholia
– all artists who have received widespread praise from
critics and fans alike. In the other you have people like The Weeknd, Frank
Ocean and The xx reinventing R&B, and returning it to its emotive roots, with
powerful lyrics and compositions that have a voice – a good example of this
being Jamie xx’s remix album with Gil Scott-Heron ‘We’re New Here’. It’s unfair
not to mention other artists like Fantastic Mr. Fox, Joy Orbison and Dark Sky
producing sounds that filter into techno and house. Somewhere else in the scale
is the enigmatic SBTRKT, whose experiments with the genre are reminiscent
of the metamorphosis prompted by Detroit Techno
for the electronic music scene in the early 90s. The
reach is such that people like Lana Del Rey and A$AP
Rocky have been sampling from the post-dubstep pool.
There are even rumours that Thom Yorke has begun
producing post-dubstep remixes under the alias Sisi
BakBak.
The question about genre still remains, and what to do
with it. It’s easy to get caught up in discussions about
genre by referencing the past in order to appropriate its
place in the present musical matrix, and even though
defining a sound by pigeon-holing it into particular
musical characteristics (structure, bpm, rhythm) – these
will only come to loosely define the entire breadth
of styles that are intrinsically linked to post-dubstep.
But the act of forcing something into a category can
be a hindrance to the beauty of the moment. For a
generation that is clearly weary of grand narratives
and less susceptible to such all-encompassing
definitions, the music industry may seem like a final stronghold for the earnest
understanding of ideas. Unfortunately for genre, the speed in which information
gathers these days is such that any well-meant discussion on the topic quickly
builds and explodes, leaving us with the bitter-sweet feeling that we’ve just
arrived late to a great party. So, either Future Garage, Future 2-step, Techno-
House, Alternative R&B or Post-Dubstep – in the end all that will remain are
the acts themselves.
U n f o r t u n a t e l y f o r g e n r e , t h e s p e e d i n w h i c h i n f o r m a -t i o n g a t h e r s t h e s e d a y s i s s u c h t h a t a n y w e l l - m e a n t d i s c u s s i o n o n t h e t o p i c q u i c k l y b u i l d s a n d e x p l o d e s , l e a v i n g u s w i t h t h e b i t t e r -s w e e t f e e l i n g t h a t w e ’ v e j u s t a r r i v e d l a t e t o a g r e a t p a r t y
Mount Kimbie by Tyrone Lebon James Blake
aThe Cafe Bar Presen
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In this edition of TFP we’ve been looking forwards
and backwards. Gil Scott-Heron was undoubtedly a
seminal influence on modern music; some pointed
to the poet and songwriter as the ‘Godfather of
Rap’, with his early records shaping the emerging
American hip hop culture. That’s us looking
backwards. Looking forwards, TFP has tried to
explore tomorrow’s world of the ‘Post-Dubstep’
genre. A genre in which Manchester-born Callum
Wright, AKA D/R/U/G/S, has been making quite
a name for himself. Not that he himself would ever
categorise his own music under a label as specific as
‘Post-Dubstep’, referencing his aversion for the music
industry’s relentless insistence on making everything
a something-‘wave’ in an early interview with As You
Are magazine. I caught up with him to look back at
a massive year for D/R/U/G/S, the difficulties DJs
face trying to get shows playing down-tempo dance
music, and his Manchester football allegiance.
Let’s start with a straightforward one: how would you describe the D/R/U/G/S genre?
Just dance music is fine by me. Because I don’t write my tunes with djing in mind I don’t feel the need to shoehorn my sound into house or techno or whatever. It’s the big benefit of being a live artist predominantly; it gives me a lot more creative freedom.
Paul Lester of The Guardian last year described your music as something that “really does belong on what we imagine a Cafe Del Mar comp would sound like.” What do you reckon? Could you see D/R/U/G/S playing Balearic Ambient tunes in front of an Ibiza sunset?
I dunno what goes on in Ibiza, I wouldn’t mind playing out there though! Obviously there’s a big muppet element that
we’d be avoiding but that goes for every booking really…
He also said that because of your name he expected you to be “electroclash synth terrorists”… thoughts?
He doesn’t have a clue.
You used to play in punk bands during your teenage years? I read an interview with you recently where you said that “most electronic music is a product of isolation, that played a big part in how I got into this.” Does this mean that having full control over the tunes you produced was one of the bigger incentives in making electronic music?
Absolutely, everything has to be my way! When I was in bands even if someone had a good idea that actually improved a song I wasn’t having it. Drummers are the worst, I hated them.
These days, DJs struggle to get sets playing the sort of music you do. Don’t get me wrong, there’s plenty of House and Techno out there, but your particular brand of atmospheric, progressive music is usually reserved for early morning sessions after a heavy night. What are your thoughts about this? Do youthink DJs place too much emphasis on whomping crowd-pleasers for their live shows?
That’s a great question. In comparison to producers who only DJ out I would imagine I feel a lot less pressure to play certain tracks or a certain style. I’ll be playing a far more varied set than someone who was considered a ‘techno’ DJ for example. I think that’s a healthy thing, those kind of creative restrictions are never beneficial in a musical sense I don’t think.
What are your main influences? Musical or otherwise…
Ambient shit like Tim Hecker, Mono and Gas. Hip Hop, alot of Kompakt Records stuff like Boratto and Superpitcher.
2011 was a big year for you, with a glut of live shows
and festivals including a slot at Glasto, could you highlight the standout moment of the year?
Would have to be the last show of the year, playing to a sold out Warehouse Project back in Manchester – after the crazy year we had it was very special. Playing Reading and Leeds would be a close second; they have so few dance acts on, so to be asked to do it was great recognition.
Try and paint a picture of what your ultimate dreamscape gig would be. As in, if a genie had granted you one wish – to be the architect of the perfect hour-long slot. Setting/crowd/era?
One of the quality dance tents at Glastonbury next year! I Genuinely can’t think of anything better, or more appropriate, for the music I make.
What’s the strangest thing that’s ever happened to you at one of your shows?
Playing on the beach at Midi Festival in France, I was in a pod about a metre from the ocean and it was mentally windy. Crazy show. So good.
Best show you’ve ever been to yourself ?
Prince at Way Out West last year. Unreal performance. Smashing out riffs on the guitar, bass and piano he was. (SIC)
What does 2012 hold for D/R/U/G/S?
Definitely a lot more music – we’ve only put out 2 12” singles and a handful of remixes so far which isn’t much. I’ve been in the studio with a vocalist recently and I’m very excited to get those tracks out.
City or United?
I’m from Manchester so obviously I support United.
D/R/u/g/st h e c r e a t i v e r e s t r i c t i o n s o fp l a y i n g u n d e r o n e g e n r e a r e n e v e r b e n e f i c i a l i n a m u s i c a l s e n s e , i d o n ’ t t h i n k .
TheFlyingPost
Review
We have to admit that finding something to write about after last month’s ‘Dogging Review’ wasn’t easy. We even appealed online for readers of the mag to pipe in with their own suggestions, but after the overwhelming response from all of two people (benches, phone booths), we decided to stop being lazy and come up with something ourselves. So here it is: the (future) dictator review. Or ‘fictators’, if you like. Understandably, this is a subject matter which may rouse a questionable response from many of you, but a wise man recently said that ‘there’s nothing in life you shouldn’t joke about; it depends what the joke is.’ We are not seeking in any way to trivialise the terrible actions of dictators past – we understand the kind of sensitivity that is generated by years of oppression and jingoistic rule. We are simply trying to highlight that there are certain things in life you just have to laugh at. Like Kim Jong Il’s claim that he invented the hamburger. Or Mobutu prohibiting anyone else from wearing leopard-print hats. In an era where we are swamped by media coverage of human atrocity after atrocity, and the men in charge of our world seem largely to share the common denominator of power-crazed lunacy, we thought it may be interesting to look forwards and anticipate what kind of crazy shit the dictators of tomorrow will be serving up. We’ll keep the genocide to a minimum, and the ludicrous eccentricities to a maximum. To illustrate the sheer ridiculousness of dictators past, we’ll even include one historical dictatorial action in the bio of each character we make up. See if you can spot ‘em.
Jurgen Von pokka, reign – 2022-48 (finland)Von Pokka was a twin kicked out of the way by his brother at birth and so, as the second-born son, was usurped to the throne. Subsequently he developed a major twin complex and, at aged 8, murdered his brother. After taking his ‘rightful’ place on Finland’s throne, he promptly set about renaming various national institutions and places: Helsinki was renamed [email protected] to promote worldwide traffic online and thrust Finland into global economics, centuries old Finnish mobile phone company Nokia was renamed as Siemens and a third of the nation’s annual budget was spent on developing half-baked iPhone apps that he thought up on holiday. His official title was also Comrade-Chairman-Prime Minister-Foreign-Minister-Minister of War-Commander-in-Chief of the People’s Army of Finland, as he awarded all cabinet positions to himself. He never shook his twin complex though, and banned the production and sale of all things that came in twos: gloves, pairs of shoes, socks and most trousers. After several years of rule, he was consumed by his fear of all things that came in twos and eventually removed one of his own kidneys, resulting in his swift death.
Dictatorial Fact: Enver Hoxha (1908-85) was the dictator of Albania from the end of World War 2 until his death in 1985. It was he who gave himself every cabinet title during his rule. He also banned beards, typewriters and colour TVs.
n’gugi wa abayomo, reign – 2035-69 (nigeria,)N’gugi became the president of Nigeria by writing his own name on the back of every ballot card during the presidential election and relying on the probability that 50% of the time the counters would pick out the card with his name on the top. Incredibly his stunt worked, and in 2035 he was elected president. Concerned with his nation’s image and the idea that people stereotypically viewed Nigerians as money scammers, he promptly had the governor of the public bank assassinated and set about dismantling the Nigerian banking and monetary system, replacing all banks with either Fitness First gyms or book-cycles and banning all trade in and out of the country. Despite fears that the entire nation would economically implode, leaving people fighting over food in the streets, it actually turned out that everyone was a lot happier and shared more. Life-expectancy went up and national literacy improved by 18%. He remained much-loved and admired until his death in 2069.
Dictatorial Fact: Francisco Macias Nguema (1924-79) of Equatorial New Guinea had the governor of the national bank murdered and carried everything that remained in the national treasury to his house in a rural village. He was an infamous embezzler of national money and once bought his son a $237 million yacht. He also claimed to be a witch-doctor with magical powers.
Dr henry c. liberty, reign – 2059-2102 (United states)Dr Henry C. Liberty (real name Randy Diggler) was not a real doctor and changed his name to Henry C. Liberty after the two most famous Americans in history: Henry Ford and the Statue of Liberty. Nobody knew what the ‘C’ stood for although conspiracy theories were rife throughout his tenure, the most prominent of which claimed it actually stood for ‘Conspiracy’. The irony of the fact that he was a dictator called ‘Liberty’ was not lost on anyone, aside from the entire North American public, who still had great trouble with the device even in the 22nd century. In 2072 he sold the Earth’s naming rights to Apple, which
FutureDictators
TheFlyingPost
Review
meant that scientists, astronomers and in fact all living beings were required to refer to it as ‘Planet Earth: Brought to you by Apple’ for the duration of Apple’s ten year, multi-trillion dollar contract. The only dictator on our list to have come close to actually causing the destruction of the Earth (Brought to you by Apple) when he became obsessed with the idea that the moon was in fact a centuries-old Communist stronghold where they were breeding far-left Chinese super-humans with Russian accents and outsourcing the globe’s relentless supply of Che Guevara t shirts. Naturally, he ordered a nuclear strike and tried to have the moon ‘removed’, which would have wrought untold natural disasters for the Earth (Brought to you by Apple) like tidal mayhem and the destabilisation of Earth’s (you get the picture) gravity. Fortunately these events did not come to pass, as he became suddenly distracted and spent the rest of the day typing his own name into Google. Eventually, he was overthrown and escaped to Hawaii – but not without 24 suitcases of American gold.
Dictatorial Fact: Ferdinand Marcos (1917-89) of the Philippines escaped to Hawaii (after the Reagan administration provided him and his wife with safe passage) with 24 suitcases full of Filipino gold, diamond jewelry hidden in diaper bags and certificates for gold bullion valued in the billions of dollars after he was eventually overthrown. He looted billions of dollars from the Filipino treasury, so much so that the Philippine government is still paying interest in public debts incurred during his administration.
field marshal lord horatio Benedict (ruler of the Known world), reign – 2095-2142 (india)Field Marshal Lord Horatio Benedict (real name Manish Singh) in fact began his ruling life as the monarch of India. As the Indian empire expanded across the globe in the wake of defeats to rival superpowers Brazil and China, his rule became more and more influential, and from 2115 onwards he took the additional title of Emperor of Britain. After defeating Britain (Singh had already taken care of America, after convincing Dr H.C Liberty into swapping the entire nations’ constitutional rights for a 30ft high gold-plated statue of Sarah Palin) in the 2112 Battle of Hull – historians remain baffled as to why precisely the battle for dominion of Great Britain was fought here – he changed his title to Field Marshal Lord Horatio Benedict: Ruler of the Known World. He established the West UK Trading Company in 2115, and forced most of the nation into a basic form of slavery (minimum wage) to keep up with India’s demand for vast quantities of affordable designer clothing, natural British herbs and mild spices, and microwavable fish and chips. Part of Lord Benedict’s genius in maintaining order in Britain during his rule was his decision to sustain the nation’s endless outpouring of mainstream reality TV: The X Factor, I’m a Celebrity, Big Brother, Pop Idol and Britain’s Got Talent were all given additional funds whilst ITV were given a further 5 channels (taking their then total to 27). As a result, Lord Benedict’s rampant and coercive exploitation across Britain went unnoticed by the vast majority of the British public, who simply thought the increasingly ubiquitous presence of Indians was down to England’s liberal immigration policies.
Dictatorial Fact: The British Empire and all advocates, then and now.
honourable leader mustafa fatsum, reign – 2022 to 2031 (Qatar)
HL Fatsum (nicknamed ‘The Mad Goat’) was born to a nomadic Bedouin family in 1987. As a youth he was famed for his love of desert life and his enormously thick glasses. Fatsum rose to prominence due to his quick temper and irrational, near schizophrenic paranoia. He saw plots everywhere even from a young age, once hatching a plan to kill every goat in the tribe after his own goat had gone missing. Unfortunately, due to his impaired vision, dogs and camels also fell to his fuzzy wrath, and because of this woeful short sightedness his tribes’ nomadic days – with no camels to bear them – were over. ‘Let them ride goat!’ was his cry, thus inspiring his moniker. Fatsum joined the army but could not distinguish between uniforms, killing where he sensed movement; this was problematic as many things moved
and Qatar was not at war. He then launched a brutally successful coup in 2022, destroying all opposition. His rule was peppered with outlandish eccentricities: he allegedly often sent love letters to the Queen of England (still alive in 2025), despite his aggressive hatred for Britain and all things therein. The land was in fact prosperous and secure for a time, until he simultaneously developed aibohphobia (fear of palindromes) and tyrannophobia (fear of tyrants), presumed to be the result of Americans firing self-doubt rays across the Atlantic from microwaves. He and his people subsequently wore tin foil hats for the remainder of his rule but, being as their homestead was predominantly made up of sweltering desert, this ensured a grim end for Fatsum. Being terrified of both his name and his occupation, his reign ended with him running through the desert screaming his name forwards and backwards covered in tin foil as he slowly baked in the desert sun.
Dictatorial fact: Idi Amin was rumoured to have sent love letters to the Queen despite hating Britain, his full title however does not allude to royalty and is a more modest ‘His Excellency, President for Life Field Marshall Al Hadj Doctor Idi Amin Dada, VC, DSO, MC. Lord of all the Beasts of the Earth and Fishes of the Sea and Conqueror of the British Empire in Africa in General and Uganda in Particular’.
tony B. liar, reign – 2069-2075 (UK)Blood-drenched gunrunning war criminal Tony B. Liar and his imbecilic prayer buddy George Dubyuh weren’t the first Western tyrants to pioneer the technique of waging war on an idea, but they took Cold-War style fear mongering to dizzying, amorphous heights. No one likes ‘terror’, right? Exactly. So let’s wage war on it! And what better way to terrify terror into submission than to beat it at its own game? By this logic the turn of the millennium was the perfect time for a series of indiscriminate wars that mostly harmed innocent civilians and children in return for appropriating their natural resources and furthering Western dominance in the Middle East. Take that, terror! After waging two illegal wars in the Middle East the natural career move for Mr Liar was official UN Middle East Peace Envoy, a position he used to completely destabilise the region. Mr Liar was apt to celebrate his meteoric diplomatic success with his well-known favourite cocktail, the ‘Bloody Liar’ - a sinister take on the bloody Mary which is a subtle blend of blood, oil and the tears of orphaned Iraqi children (finished with salt, pepper, gunpowder and horseradish). On one of his regular visits to the shadowy underworld from whence he was spawned, Mr Liar managed to smuggle back his “close family friend” Muammar Gaddafi from the clutches of death. A cunning ploy involving a combination of Gaddafi’s renowned, endless torrents of mad, incomprehensible shit followed by Liar’s slimy PR skills, brainwashed all the protesters in Tahrir square into conceding that Mubarak is in fact “immensely courageous and a force for good” (as Tony had been saying all along), at which point he won a landslide victory in the first ‘free’ Egyptian elections. He promptly banned any further elections, but nobody noticed because they were too busy trying to figure out what on earth had happened. It was through this unholy triple-alliance and a few more trips to and from the underworld that Liar eventually became the first ‘Holy and Benevolent Emperor of the Middle East and Europe’. This new superpower teamed up with the US to wipe out Africa and China and completed total world domination in 2075. Since then the three Eternal Truths of Benevolent Peace Envoy Tony B. Liar have been recited every morning by all citizens: ‘WAR IS PEACE, FREEDOM IS SLAVERY, IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH’.
Dictatorial Fact: We’ll give you a clue… his wife’s called Cherie, he was the first serving prime minister questioned as part of a criminal inquiry and he’s got big ears.
words by benny gromadski & michael goffman
Illustration, Jurgen Von Pokka by Simon Peplowwww.simonpeplow.com
Illustration, Field Marshall Lord Horatio Benedict by Patrick Cullumwww.patrickcullum.com
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