February 2011 - Tukee AZ

What’s Your Passion

Stepping In

That One Thing

Rules of Engagement

to Sexy Bedrooms

that Stands Out

Complete Viking Kitchen

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Complete Viking Kitchen

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Contents

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14

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F E A T U R E S

W H A T ’ S I N S I D E

RUlES oF ENgAgEmENT“John and Joan had been in love since high school. Her plan was to become an actress where she earned small parts at the old globe Theatre in San Diego opposite a new actor named John Wayne.”

What’s Your Passion?Interesting stories containing some fact, some fiction, but always with a mixture of boldness, courtesy and an uncanny air of familiarity.

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DESIgNER SEcRETS To SExy BEDRoomSI understand the master bedroom is not one you generally show off, but...

Stepping InStep into our world where we will escort you through various designing techniques and ideas. Some old, some new and some yet to be named, either way, the door is open and after you visit, you won’t want to leave, mostly because we won’t let you!

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THE PRINcESS AND THE PEEPSI can’t let February go without taking time to appreciate the other primary loves in my life....my girlfriends.

Behind the CurtainIt’s not always easy to pull the curtain back. These are issues you don’t always find the words for, and along with ideas, you’ll want to uncover for yourself.

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THE coUNSEloR IS INIntimacy and Authenticity: Risks Worth Taking

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“WHIlST” yoU DoN’T FoRgET...yes, she actually said “whilst”... Don’t write off the old when it’s now the new!

That One ThingWe know how to find what stands out, whats worth writing about... that One Thing that jumps out at you.

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SomE lIkE IT HoTmanaging your home’s temperature via smartphones. Not possible? Think again.

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TukeeAZ February 2011

lovE oN THE (SocIAl NETWoRkINg) RockSIt seems clear that most of these change-in-relationship-status postings are more about the poster seeking revenge on, or initiating a reaction from their (ex)lover than anything else.

The Deep EndForget your life vest, refill your oxygen tank and dive into a section that will surprise, amaze, educate and possibily anger you with topics you were waiting for “the other guy to bring up.” Feel free to throw down the gauntlet and challenge us.

32

WARDRoBE TIPS FoR ARIzoNA’S “THAW”It’s all about color!

Second GlanceWhat makes you STOP, TURN AROUND, and take a Second Glance... It’s worth it!

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To PRoTEcT AND To SERvEDefending a girls best friend. Being presented with the sizeable investment of an engagement ring, you’ll want to protect it for reasons both practical and sentimental.

Area 44Area 44 unlike Area 51 doesn’t have any alien sightings or do they? Area 44 is Ahwatukee.

30

lEgAlIzINg mARIJUANA: HoW IT WoRkS.Persons who use marijuana for medical purposes are not immune from Arizona’s driving under the influence DUI laws.

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Page 6 TukeeAZ Magazine www.TukeeAZ.com Volume 1 Issue 3 February 2011

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Artistic ArrangementsFor Valentine’s Day...For Valentine’s Day...

and Every Day of The Year

Denise Teichert

Local Designer Denise Teichert,

Owner of Teichert Design Group and

Show Host of Fine Wine and Design has

actively lead complete floor to ceiling

design projects for over 18 years for both

residential and commercial projects.

Denise is an Allied Member of ASID and is a

regular contributor for Tukee AZ.

e-mail: [email protected]

Contributors

PUBLISHERSAZ Media Consultants, LLC

Isabel & Kevin Ham

ART DEPARTMENTJeb Blann

Angelina Gonzales

ADDITIONAL CONTRIBUTORSMelanie Beauchamp

Tiffany CraigJoel Henderson

PRINTING CONSULTANTRobert Petri

© 2011 by Arizona MediaConsultants, LLC

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reprduced in any form without prior written

consent from TukeeAZ Magazine

TO OUR READERS:TukeeAZ Magazine would love to hear your reactions to our magazine! Feel free to send

us an e-mail:[email protected]

ADVERTISERSTukeeAZ is distributed to select area

homes and through prime area businesses. To hear more or to

request a media kit, please contact Isabel Ham at 480.656.0626 or

[email protected]

Chef Laura SlamaAn Ahwatukee resident since 1992, Laura Slama is a

graduate of Le Cordon Bleu, Scottsdale and the University

of Pennsylvania. As the executive chef and owner of

Celebrated Cuisine, as well as Laura’s Gourmet, the

producer of four moutherwatering flavors of artisan crafted

granola. Chef Laura is also a regular contributor to several

television shows, including Sonoran Living Live and the

Valley Dish. She also is a regular contributor to Tukee

AZemail: [email protected]

Marcie Edmonds

In her Ahwatukee practice, Change of Heart Counseling, Marcie Edmonds, M.C.,

L.P.C., helps people cope with and heal from a range of issues including depression,

anxiety, addictions, codependency and relationship challenges, divorce, grief and

more. Reach her at [email protected] or visit her online at

www.changeofheartcounseling.com. Or, find her at www.TukeeAZ.com.

Diane Meehl

Longtime Ahwatukee resident, Diane Meehl, owner of Your Words by Design, is

an independent journalist and editor, a mother of 3 and an active community and

church volunteer. A regular contributor to several local publications, including The

Arizona Republic, Ahwatukee Foothills News and Raising Arizona Kids magazine, Diane

can be found poring over her laptop during piano and ballet lessons.

Scott Gruby

Scott Gruby is a software engineer in San Diego, California. He has written mobile

applications for more than 15 years, most recently for the iPhone and the iPad.

www.TukeeAZ.com

Susan Brashears Wacker

Susan Brashears Wacker divides her time between her

work in real estate, her hobbies of jewelry making, art

and writing, and her time with her elderly parents, two

adult daughters and four granddaughters. Susan’s roots

run deep in Arizona. Her grandparents were all early

pioneer settlers in the Verde Valley, Phoenix and Prescott and include the Brashears,

Smith, Hicks and Marshal families. Most of Susan’s youth was spent in Chinle and

Parker, Arizona and also Mesa and Flagstaff. She now makes her home in La Mesa,

California with her husband Dennis.

COVER PHOTOArt Holeman, PhotographerMichael’s Creative Jewelry

Foothills Floral Gallery


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Welcome!

Dear Tukee AZ Reader,

Welcome! I’m so glad you’ve discovered our magazine, and I look forward to your feedback. Allow me to introduce myself. I have been

blessed with many wonderful gifts in my life… my beautiful children, supportive and loving friends and family,

and an exciting and rewarding career. I’ve also been fortunate to live, work and play in a community full of

inspiration, growth and true spirit. When I was offered the opportunity to serve as Design Editor for Tukee AZ,

my response was an elated, “YES!” Not because I love the challenges of intense deadlines or the occasional bout

of writer’s block, but because I’ve been given an opportunity to share my knowledge and passion for design with

others in this community we call home.

My background and experience in design and media go back many years. I won’t share the actual number of

them with you because, well, you might not believe I’m still thirty-nine and that’s my story, I’m sticking to it! I

come from a family of gifted artists, so it only seems natural that I follow that path. My education and years of

experience reside mostly in fashion and interior design. I’ve spent most of my adult life creating visual displays

and designs for both commercial and residential spaces. My background in media has enabled me to share

many of the transformations I, along with my talented team, have created for our clients.

In 2005, I launched a career in media with the local lifestyle television show, Fine Wine and Design. We

showcase extraordinary floor to ceiling design projects, wine pairings, and recipes from top celebrity chefs. I

look forward to introducing to you the many facets of design. Together we’ll step into the world of talented

designers and take a look at the innovative products and exceptional art found right here in Ahwatukee. We’ll

journey through local design events and scout out the “must do’s” as we discover new ways to create and

engage in the “how-to’s.”

I am proud to be a part of the Tukee AZ lineup… and I look forward to embracing homemakers, foodie

enthusiasts, fellow artists and designers looking to get their creative juices flowing, learn something new, or just

have fun! I’ll enthusiastically encourage you to enhance your home, your style and your life through art, design,

food and wine, and I invite you to enjoy all that TUKEE has to offer.

Both our Art & Creative Directors said “we need an editor’s letter and a

picture”. In our opinion, an editor’s letter is sometimes overlooked. For now,

we will continue to publish interesting content, some fact and some fiction,

delivered with a mixture of boldness and courtesy from contributors, both

professional and “ semi professional” that will present “behind the curtain”

opinions with style, passion and an uncanny air of familiarity. Here is a small part

of our beginning along with the first of many contributor introductions.

A foreboding of destined CHANGE, was the feeling we had on a warm Ahwatukee evening as

we sat down to dinner with one of our friends. She lifted the glass, testing her newest find, a Malbac, and in her usual “flair”, threw

down the gauntlet (she actually did that) and said, “Well, are we going to do it”? Now don’t let your mind wander into THAT area! She

was talking about all the urging we’d had from numerous community leaders, business owners and residents to produce a magazine

befitting Ahwatukee’s lifestyle, a publication that would focus on local businesses and people in a manner equal to its own uniqueness.

Well, we picked up that gauntlet and said, “only if you’re going to jump in with us”……so enhance a friendship into a marriage, yes, I

am now married to Denise Teichert, in the publishing sense. It has taken 3 years, and she continues to be as unique as our community

and the magazine she is the Design Editor for. With her knowledge and professionalism, you’ll find what we found, a woman with a

positive “I can accomplish anything and in half the time” attitude. So, “step in” with Denise and welcome to our world.

Next Month, be prepared to meet our other friend and Contributor, Chef Laura.

I might ask her to marry me too….in the Publishing sense!

Cheers! Denise Teichert

Kevin & Isabel

Page 10 TukeeAZ Magazine www.TukeeAZ.com Volume 1 Issue 3 February 2011 Page 11 TukeeAZ Magazine www.TukeeAZ.com Volume 1 Issue 3 February 2011

t’s interesting how the one

room in our home where we

spend the most time is the

last to get decorated. Over

the 18-plus years I’ve been

helping people enhance their

living spaces, I can count on one hand the

number of calls I’ve received specifically for

help with master bedroom designs. I get

numerous calls regarding children’s rooms.

Putting our children first is not a bad thing,

however any marriage counselor out there

will stress the importance of having a

little “you/us” time. I am by no means

a marriage counselor; trust me, I will be

following my own advice as I write. Some

of you are smiling, I know.

I understand the master bedroom is not

one you generally show off. It’s not the

first room your guests see and it doesn’t

have to be transformed into some happy

place to keep your children occupied and

feeling safe. Therefore our time, budgets

and thoughts are focused on those “more

happen’n” spaces. In actuality, though,

your life and/or your relationship may

very well be “more happen’n” if you put

invest in your most personal space…your

bedroom!

Whether you’re single and want to change

what you are attracting, (or just want to

attract, period) or if you’re looking to

recharge the eroticism in your existing

relationship, start by incorporating these

sexy design principles into your bedroom.

Don’t wait! This is far too important to put

on hold. Valentine’s Day is just around the

corner; this is a perfect time to re-charge

your bedroom… and your romantic life. A

few tips to get the (creative) juices flowing:

• Remove the clutter - including anything

that reminds you of past lovers, such as

photos, love letters, gifts, etc. And get rid

of any bad memories. If you’re looking to

rejuvenate, you have to start fresh.

• New bedding can bring fresh energy;

so this is where I advise you to splurge.

Crisp, clean sheets (I recommend a 450 -

650 thread count) entice us to jump in.

Keep your bedding simple…. comfortable

and uncomplicated.

• Cozy up your walls. Warm tones are

sexy. Try browns, beiges, apricots and

yellows. Red is the color of love and

passion; but use caution, because it also

stimulates anger - unless you’re into that

kind of thing.

• You might find it interesting that yellow

symbolizes communication, so keep that

in mind if you’re lacking in that area.

• As hard as this will be for some, try to

keep computers and televisions out of

your bedroom. If that’s impossible for

you, then at least hide them in a cabinet

or armoire.

• Keep all exercise equipment out of the

bedroom - that’s not the excitement we

are trying to create here!

• When it comes to accessorizing, think in

terms of pairs. One of anything represents

loneliness; so plan for two nightstands,

two candles on a dresser, two pictures on a

wall. And your accessories are the perfect

opportunity to introduce that passionate

red. It’s been said that a red object on

the nightstand increases eroticism in the

female partner, a copper one in men.

• Lastly, keep in mind allure is in the

lighting. Soften your lighting with the

use of dimmers, candles and oil lamps.

Not only does it set

the mood but we all

look better in soft

lighting, too.

With a bit of time

and effort, your

love life will match

your bedroom’s

passionate décor.

Enough said!

Valentine’s Day is just around

the corner; this is a perfect time

to re-charge your bedroom…

and your romantic life.

Looking for a romantic piece of furniture? Let me introduce you to the Chaise Lounge. Properly known as “Chaise Loungue”, which is French for long chair. A symbol of luxury and comfort it’s perfect for your bedroom or sitting room. The unique design of a chaise lounge makes it extremely comfortable. Its artistic curves make it a sexy piece of furniture that is sure to bring a touch of romance to your décor. There are a wide range of options when it comes to choosing a look that’s right for you. Traditional to modern you’re sure to find the right fit!

When in LOVE…

By: Denise Teichert

Do as the

Frenchdo…

SteppingIn

SexyBy: Denise Teichert

BedroomsDesigners’ Secrets to

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ut together pieces they can wear now that have staying power to wear later in the season. I

often find women have

a hard time choosing

clothing outside of their comfort zone.

This is especially true when it comes to

color. Just because it’s still winter, don’t

be afraid to embrace color! Navy is hot

this season, along with yellow and shades

of grey. I tend to get the question, “Why

so much yellow? It’s not summer time

yet!” Once again, it’s all about transition.

Why not try a bright canary top or

cardigan, which easily transitions into the

next season. Save time and stretch your

wardrobe budget. High five, ladies!

The key to making the most of this in-

between time is to gather versatile pieces

to add to your collection. Not a big fan

of yellow? Try a sheer navy blouse, with

a classic cut pair of grey or silver pants,

and since it’s still cold outside, pick up a

matching blazer as well. Choose items you

can wear to both work and happy hour,

and look great in both places!

Finally, every outfit that achieves a “put

–together” look requires accessories. Try

some silver textures that are everywhere

right now, such as a silver cuff and

matching necklace to stitch your look

together. And don’t forget your most

essential accessory …confidence!

Wardrobe Tips for Arizona’s “Thaw”:

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sn’t it funny how we tend to

write off what is “old” in favor

of what is new? We can’t help

it, it’s just human nature. I

mean, why settle for the old

and understood, when you

can take on the new and exciting? Well, I

have one word for why not, Ruffino Italian

Cuisine.

A few evenings ago, after a thwarted

attempt to dine at a few new restaurants

in our “bubble” (one was in “training

mode”, the other still learning the basics),

my dining partners and I decided to visit an

oldie but a (potentially) goodie at Warner

between 48th and 51st streets, Ruffino

Italian Cuisine. As you may be aware, it

went under new ownership about three

years ago. Gone is the garish red wall,

the old Italian décor, and in its place is

a spot that made me say, “where have I

been?” Seriously, from the warm greeting

at the door, to the knowledgeable cocktail

server dying to make us feel comfortable, I

had to pinch myself for a second. I was a

little thrown off by the live entertainment

until the little voice inside my head said

“embrace, don’t reject” and before I knew

it, I, too, was flying to the moon…..

We decided to enjoy appetizers in the

lounge while waiting for our table (yes,

there was a wait), which included the

beef carpaccio and the bacon wrapped

scallops. Both were delicious, although I

would suggest the kitchen slice the beef

a teeny bit thicker so it is easier to lift

from the plate, and perhaps cooking the

“Whilst” You Don’t Forget Ruffino Italian Cuisine

By: Chef Laura

That OneThing

bacon slightly longer (but don’t ruin those

scallops, they were perfection!).

Our server, David, wanted nothing

less than to please, and he performed

flawlessly. For those of you that know me,

I can be a little challenging, and so that is

exactly what I did – I challenged him to

bring me that evening’s best dish on the

menu – which turned out to be the Halibut

Genovese – Pan seared halibut with capers

and artichokes, so perfectly cooked, that

after 30 minutes sitting on my plate (I

am a bit of a talker) it was still moist

and enjoyable). My dining companions

put old and new school to the test, veal

marsala and fresh seafood ravioli. Again,

pinch me – where am I? The Tuke? The

veal was reminiscent of my days in

excellent restaurants in Manhattan; the

house-made pasta definitely did not deter

from the abundant seafood inside that

had no chance of being overwhelmed by

ricotta – a great balance.

Oh, but I digress. Whilst (yes, I wrote

whilst) waiting for the main, we shared the

hearts of palm salad. Replete with hearts

of palm, artichoke hearts, roasted red bell

peppers, baby romaine, tomatoes and a

great balsamic vinaigrette, it was funny to

see three people so enraptured by a salad.

Dessert was a little more challenging.

Most of the desserts come from an offsite

bakery, so we specifically asked for that

which is made in house (crème brulee) and

back East (cannoli). Suffice to say, both hit

a basic need, but I am confident, given the

talent of the chef, desserts in house could

be so much better (Chef Laura reminder –

better to offer fewer options that are yours

and awesome, than too many which don’t

reflect all the wonderful things your guests

have already experienced).

I am grateful to the current rash of

Ahwatukee restaurant newbies for not

being ready for me yet. I was able to

rediscover what has always been here and

found a new place for my bubble to float.

Gone is the garish red wall, the old Italian décor, and in its place is a spot that made me say, “where have I been?”

Photos By: Art Holeman


irst dates can be awk-

ward. Anyone who tells

you otherwise apparently

never had one. From the

drive to the restaurant, to

selecting the menu items,

enduring lapses in conversation, and of

course, the inner monologue (“do I have

food in my teeth”, “is my conversation

interesting”, “did he just check out that

other woman?”), first dates can be excru-

ciating.

But first dates can also be exciting – no

lapses in conversation, easy familiarity, no

room for inner monologue as words tum-

ble unfiltered from your mouth.

The restaurant we pick can play a role in

making or breaking that first date. Lucky

for us, we have The Living Room not too

far away. Tucked into the edge of a retail

strip in Chandler, The Living Room is ex-

actly that – easy familiarity that embraces

you the moment you walk in. Depend-

ing on your mood and your dining com-

panion, choose to sit indoors at the bar, a

high top, or a table for four or outdoors on

the abundant couches. No matter where,

you will be greeted by a service staff who

knows the menu, isn’t shy about sharing

their favorites, can navigate you through

the wine list or make up a cocktail de-

signed to please your specific desire.

On the Saturday evening I visited The Liv-

ing Room it was nearly full at 6pm. I did

notice that women outnumbered men,

but I think that was more due to the fact

that the menu appeals more to women

than men – I call it a “grazing menu”,

comprised of items that are meant to be

shared, as opposed to the traditional “what

are you having?” menu where someone in

your group is certain to have entrée envy

(entrée envy: the emotion one feels when

eyeing another person’s entrée and think-

ing “I should have ordered that!”).

Following the directions of our enthusias-

tic server, Morgan, we started with two

bruschetta. The first was more of a test

since it can be an easily ruined classic: to-

mato, mozzarella and basil with a drizzle

of balsamic reduction. Presented sliced

in thirds, each piece had plenty of toma-

toes and fresh mozzarella nicely brought

together by the balsamic. The second,

selected by my dining partner, was com-

prised of prosciutto, figs, mascarpone and

tomato jam, also in thirds, proved to be a

tasty balance of sweet and salty.

From there we ventured into sandwich

land, enjoying a house roasted turkey

sandwich with provolone, roasted pep-

pers and basil pesto, served hot, with a

chopped vegetable salad on the side. As

a professional chef known for her pesto, I

am pretty picky when I taste others, but

this one I definitely enjoyed, especially in

combination with the turkey. The prime

beef sliders were also tasty, and were a lit-

tle more filling than the bruschetta, impor-

tant if you want to leave feeling like you

have eaten an actual meal.

Other items we tried included the anti-

pasto board with selected Italian meats,

cheese, olives and ciabatta, great to share,

especially in a large group, as well as the

hot Bavarian pretzel, made in house, of-

fered with three different mustards. I con-

sider myself a pretzel connoisseur, and this

one was definitely up to snuff.

Chef’s Caution - If you select The Living

Room for your first date, prepare yourself.

The combination of atmosphere, service

and menu is the perfect formula for dating

success. The rest, of course, is up to you.

Chef Laura note: All good first dates result

in a second. On a return visit to the Living

Room, this time enjoying the brie fondue

and few different bruschetta, I was happy

to see the same consistently friendly staff

and one even remembered my visit from

the earlier visit. At The Living Room, it is

easy to see how that first date could easily

start a long term love affair.

D I N I N g I N

The living RoomBy: Chef Laura

That onething

That OneThing


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By now, we thought we’d all live like The Jetson’s. While home automation has remained

a topic of conversation for years and there are so many advances in technology, we’re not

there just yet. True, we’ve enjoyed systems for turning lights on and off during certain

hours, and timers to fire up appliances at night. Still, Judy wouldn’t be too impressed.

A programmable thermostat remains the simplest form of in-home automation; an

essential for both comfort and energy savings. These relatively mundane devices enable

the regulation of heat or air at predictable intervals, and they have been the extent of the

promise of life at a touch of a button. That is… until now.

A company called Radio Thermostat, www.radiothermostat.com, makes a few Wi-

Fi enabled thermostats, putting this technology on a new trajectory. While they

won’t automatically clean your house or make dinner, these devices help regulate

the temperature…whether you’re relaxing at home or

globetrotting.

These thermostats perform the same

functions as their contemporaries, but

also integrate with your home network so

you can control the temperature from not

only the comfort of your couch, but from

anywhere you can connect via mobile

application or web-based connection; but

that’s not all. For instance, if you leave

the house and forget to turn off the air,

you can hold the temperature to achieve

maximum efficiency. Plus, programming

these thermostats is a snap, just log into the

website for instructions.

One of the best features of these thermostats,

including the CT-30, and its counterpart, the

3M Filtrete 50, is that they are affordable. Each

is available for a price just slightly higher than

a programmable thermostat, around $99. Installation will, of course, cost extra, but if

you’re slightly handier than George Jetson, installation shouldn’t be too difficult.

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That OneThing


“John and Joan had been in love since high school. Her plan was to become an actress,

and she earned small parts at the Old Globe Theatre in San Diego opposite a new actor

named John Wayne.”

Whats yourPassion?

RulesEngagementof

“Rules of Engagement?” she asked. “Just exactly what are those, and why do you have to enlist and go to Korea, or Japan, or to whatever secret place they’re sending you?”

“Well, my love,” he answered, “the ROE’s are complicated and confusing at best. Basically, they are the guidelines that determine where, when and how you conduct

yourself in difficult situations. And yes, I have to go… to serve our country and preserve our freedom so future generations, our children, might not have to.”

“I understand. But I hate that you’re leaving. I love you desperately.”

By: Isabel Ham


were to be married. No one knew. It

wasn’t official.

After all those letters professing his love,

abruptly, they stopped. Joan had been

heartbroken to find out that he was

missing in action (MIA) and quite possibly

dead on arrival (DOA). She didn’t know

exactly what had happened, but she was

going to go find him! When she left for

the Orient, she didn’t tell anyone, knowing

they’d advise against it. She didn’t want

to hear it; so she was gone.

After months, and no word from either

of them, there was a beach party and all

the usual suspects showed up. Beach

parties at “The Del” in San Diego during

the 1940’s and 50’s involved bonfires

with lots of friends, some you didn’t even

know. One in particular stepped forward

to announce he was back. It was John;

and he was looking for Joan. No one knew

where to find her. After surviving Korean

and Japanese battles, he was faced with a

bigger fear - losing his love forever.

A glimmer of hope, mixed with

paralyzing fear hit him when he

found that she’d left to look for him!

Back to Korea and Japan to no avail,

she had come and gone. He returned

to the States, where he came across

her brother, Bob attending Annapolis

Academy, who told him cryptically “the

last I heard from my sister who obviously

inherited the blood of our adventuring

Spanish ancestors, was that she was going

home”. That was all, nothing more.

Had too much time passed for a love to

survive? It was a summer day, and the

Alabama sun was threatening her tomato

plants as Joan watched her child playing

in the mud of their 150-year-old family

homestead, when a man approached.

They stood looking at each other, and in

that moment, it evaporated - the vision of

what their life would have been. All the

years of hoping and dreaming and finally

giving up, came rushing in on them. In

that moment a voice echoed, “Your

chance is gone.”

As he watched the little girl, rub muddy

hands on her mothers skirt, he looked at

Joan with longing, smiled, blew her a kiss

and then turned and walked away. He

never looked back. She didn’t run after

him this time. She stood still, tears in her

eyes she looked down at her child, the one

with John’s personality, and envisioned

the ones to come. In that moment, she

vowed to teach them that when they find

love, hold on tightly, don’t let anything

get in the way…not work, not play - not

even a war.

A love like that is so fragile, so precious,

that even if you have to break “THE RULES

of ENGAGEMENT” to defend it… then….

do it!

Many hours later, surrounded by all the

artifacts from this unrequited love, I knew

that she had excelled in HER mission. My

brothers, John, Clay, Charles, and a sister

Kayte, would agree. For me, hopefully

I’ll find the man that quite possibly is my

father, and thank him for the love he gave

to my mother, the respect he afforded

her, and the service he gave our country.

The “Rules of Engagement” are those you

follow each day, the ones you respect when

you’re engaged with any relationship.

Whats yourPassion?

uncovered those words and

many more contents in an

old cigar box. Dusty and

unopened, it had languished

in a large crate that had

been ignored and moved

from one house to another. The storage

company had called and asked if I wanted

to continue renting a space. Having taken

out all the important items and stacking

them in my garage, I thought, well, it

wouldn’t matter if I gave away the rest to

Goodwill. I almost wish I had.

Buried deep down under torn papers

and pieces of an old scrapbook with gold

corners, I discovered carefully hidden

handwritten letters. I was shocked to see

them. I thought I’d already discovered

all the mementos of my mother’s life

after her early departure from mine. The

numbered letters were both old ones

and new. Thumbing quickly through the

photographs, my eyes settled on a man I’d

never seen before. Mingled throughout

the box were photos of my mother

pictured with the same man, strategically

hidden in between love notes with her

lip prints on them, and programs from

The Old Globe Theatre. Amongst the pile

was a skillfully drawn sketch of a naked

woman, complete with a beauty mark on

her cheek.

The excavated trove revealed old menus

from restaurants, a cross without a chain,

a booklet titled ‘The Mass on the day

of Marriage,’ a key (to a house?), a tiny

pill box tucked with a note that read,

‘whoever opens this must give a kiss,’ a

sultry picture of my mother, who looked

like Elizabeth Taylor down to the beauty

mark, wearing a black velvet swimsuit…

and one of a man in a uniform and helmet

smoking a cigar. On the back it read, “this

is me beside my home. I carry the carbine

to fight off the Korean girls. The armor vest

is to hold in my stomach. I have a cig in

my mouth because we get them free. One

pant’s leg is up because I just scratched my

leg. If you can’t use this, please send it

to the home for old soldiers, I Love you

desperately”

I thought, this guy has a great sense of

humor… who is he? There was more,

including an old box made of fabric

emblazoned with the word, passion, and

I was almost afraid to open that one! First,

I got up to get a drink - I won’t tell you

what kind, but for the sake of posterity, I’ll

just say, those Argentineans’ know what

they’re doing - and came back PREPARED

to find just ONE MORE corner to turn in

my life. I hoped it wouldn’t be a dead end.

I opened the “passion” box, and found

exactly that…it was filled with poems

and letters that would put Hallmark out

of business, plus, two rings. What existed

in those letters was the love of a lifetime,

and I never knew it. Here’s how the story

unfolded.

John and Joan had been in love since

high school. Her plan was to become an

actress, and she earned small parts at the

Old Globe Theatre in San Diego opposite

a new actor named John Wayne. Her

friend, Suzanne Pleshette, had advised her

to ‘hang in there’ and a good part would

come along. She could dance, and had a

beautiful face and a wonderful personality,

but couldn’t carry a tune to save her

life… something I inherited, along with

her friends name. John had enlisted into

the Army and was serving with the 40th

Division in Korea where he was awarded

the Combat Infantryman’s badge. They

“A love like that is so fragile, so precious, that even if you have to break “THE RULES of

ENGAGEMENT” to defend it… then….do it!”


network of friends fared a better chance

of survival.

In my own strictly empirical research, it is

clear to me that women are different from

men in this regard. Often, in order to cope

with their stress, men choose to retreat.

Together in groups, guys seem more

likely to seek diversion than conversation.

There seems to be an unwritten rule not

to talk about their problems, whereas with

women, how much we share is precisely

the measure of our closeness.

It doesn’t take long for women to achieve

this intimacy. We tell our labor stories to

the pregnant woman in the bathroom. We

celebrate our children and commiserate

over their struggles. We laugh at the

antics of our significant others and we

cry over our profound disappointments

in them. We deliver meals when one of

us is sick, because we instinctively know

that the caregiver is often the last on her

own list. We humble ourselves to each

other, and we draw strength from the

encouragement we so effortlessly offer to

one another.

So Princesses and Queens, join me in

celebrating your Knightess-in-shining-

Uggs. Because she’ll ride you off into the

sunset and emancipate you from your

hours of toil… at least until you’ve got to

get the kids to bed.

Longtime Ahwatukee resident Diane

Meehl is an independent writer and can

be found in her closet, talking with her

girlfriends on the phone.

on’t get me wrong, I’m

all for technology. I love

an e-card in my inbox;

but when it comes to

expressing my feelings

during Valentine’s Day,

I’m a devout believer in the church of

Hallmark. However, my still knight-in-

shining-denim is not the only one I’m

thinking of as I forage for greeting cards

this year.

I can’t let February go without taking time

to appreciate the other primary loves in

my life…my girlfriends. Without them,

I’m not certain I would have survived the

adventure that is marriage these 16 years

and counting. Their support, laughter

and constant companionship is vital to the

many and varied roles I play every single

day. The women in my “foxhole” have

my back, and I’d take a bullet for any of

them. (Of course it might take the shape

of sharing an emergency cocktail to shake

off some mother-in-law stress.)

Nothing prepares one for the rigors

of marriage, family life or intimate

relationships. No one explains that after

the Prince sweeps in, every Princess rides

off to a castle for which she will carry a

hefty load of responsibilities, including

cleaning the royal “thrones.” Or that

over time, the tiara tarnishes, the Prince

occasionally acts downright froggish,

and the fever pitch of courtship simmers.

Marriage is a marathon, and every wife

needs a gang of girlfriends to help her

retain her reign as Queen. Her very life

depends on them.

Evidence suggests my theory rings true:

women with strong friendships enjoy

more robust health. Jeffery Zaslow, author

of The Girls from Ames, spent a decade

immersed in the study of a group of

women and their friendships. “A host of

studies show that having a close group of

friends helps women sleep better, improve

their immune systems, stave off dementia

and actually live longer,” he said. His

research revealed a study at Stanford

University that showed women with late-

stage breast cancer who enjoyed a large

By: Diane MeehlThe Princess & The Peeps

Behind TheCurtain


By: Marcie Edmonds, M.C., L.P.C.

The Counselor Is In Intimacy and Authenticity: Risks worth Taking

Behind TheCurtain

bout a year ago Steph

had a digital image of us

created by the amazing

Nan Lawson. She loved

that print, she framed

it, blogged about it, and

posted it on facebook. So, I contacted

Nan soon after that and asked her to do

a top secret project for me. She had all

the photos, and knew our styles already

from when Steph did business with her.

My project was a little different than the

other one though. I asked Nan if she

could illustrate me on one knee instead of

standing.

Finally Monday, December 27th I went

to the ring store to just “look” at the ring

and decide what I should do. The ring

was not online anymore so I was worried

it would be discontinued. I was able to

walk away owning the ring that I would

ask the woman I love to marry me. I knew

I had to act fast if I wanted to propose that

week. Her sister, and close friends would

leave the following week for school. The

proposal had to happen with them here.

I secretly set up a breakfast with her parents

one early morning. They knew that the big

question was coming, and fully supported

us. They couldn’t wait for Steph and I to

start the next chapter in our lives. After

getting their approval, I went home, tried

to get sleep and planned how I was going

to propose.

Stephanie came over to my house to

meet up and go to dinner. She came

in, and I told her to sit down because I

had a present for her. She looked at me

like “why did you buy me something?”

I told her that it wasn’t big and I gave

her the wrapped frame. When she saw it

she jokingly said “Its not a ring!” I loved

hearing that, because she had NO idea

what was coming. Then she opened the

present and was so happy to see it was a

Nan Lawson. It took her a minute to realize

what I was doing on the print. Once she

realized she started to tear up and kept

repeating “Are you serious?” “Is this a

joke?” Then I got on one knee, opened

up the ring box and said. “I love you so much, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?” She was in complete shock. All I heard for

a minute was “Seriously?? Did you buy

that? Is this really happening?” I put the

ring on her ring finger and gave her a hug

and she then said YES!

Since that day we have loved being

engaged and that much closer to being

married. I truly love Stephanie SO much,

and I am so blessed to have her as my

fiancé. I can’t believe that in about a year

she will become Mrs. Henderson.. Then I

will be the luckiest man in the world.

Joel and Stephanie’s proposal story...

oes this sound familiar?

You often think one

thing yet say another.

Or, your standard

answer to a casual

greeting is, “I’m fine,”

even if it isn’t true? You aren’t alone; many

of us employ these practices in certain

contexts. However, patterns such as these

turn problematic when they become the

only way we “do life,” walking around

with an invisible sign that reads, “If

you only knew.”

Many of us have learned

how not to say what

we really think, believe

or feel. We do this

out of fear of others’

reactions: i.e., he/

she will get mad at

me; my words will

be hurtful; I’m afraid

if you know my truth

you may not want to

be with me. We mask

our sadness behind

anger. We drape our pain

with a smile. We soothe

our emotional wounds with

compulsive activities. Over time,

these habits become symptoms of

a range of psychological issues making

their way to my office.

Feeling dissatisfied with life, discontented

in relationships, depressed, anxious or

drawn to addictive behaviors often propels

people to seek professional help. During

their journey in therapy, clients can learn

to become more authentic. Practicing

authenticity means being true to oneself…

to your personality, spirit and character.

The difference means knowing when it’s

appropriate to say, “I’m fine”, to the

c h e c k o u t

clerk, but admitting, “I could really use a

shoulder to cry on,” to a significant other.

Creating emotional intimacy in

relationships requires risk. I like to

describe intimacy as, “in-to-me-you-see.”

True intimacy involves allowing yourself

to be vulnerable. We do this by sharing

all of ourselves with someone we trust,

speaking truthfully and letting go of the

potential consequences. When we try to

control the outcome in relationships, we

end up sacrificing our authenticity if we

are not equipped to deal with conflict

or rejection. So we act as if life is

an election, toting a campaign

slogan that says, “Vote for

me! Vote for me!” It’s

exhausting to sustain

that kind of insincerity.

Are you ready to

take a calculated

risk in 2011? Make

a commitment to

express your inner

self, and worry less

about what others

think. Align your

thoughts, words,

feelings and actions,

and you may discover real

change in your experiences

and relationships. It’s what I refer

to as living a life that is authentic. It’s

not an easy shift, and it forces us right

out of our comfort zone. But it’s the

surest path to sustaining loving, engaged,

intimate relationships.


Area 44

n November 2, 2010,

Arizona voters approved

Proposition 203 legalizing

marijuana for medicinal

use. The Department of

Health Services (DHS) has

yet to finalize rules that will be used to

regulate medical marijuana. The informal

draft Rules and comments thereto are

available at the Arizona Department

Health Services website.

At this time it appears that the following

rules and guidelines are expected to be

used to determine who may use medical

marijuana and how it may be dispensed

and cultivated. Medical marijuana may

be used for the following conditions:

Cancer, glaucoma, HIV/AIDS, Hepatitis

C, ALS, Crohn’s disease, Alzheimer’s

disease, cachexia or wasting syndrome,

severe and chronic pain, severe nausea,

seizures (including epilepsy), and severe

or persistent muscle spasms (including

multiple sclerosis). Patients must have a

doctor’s certification of their diagnosis of

an eligible condition and certification that

use would be medically beneficial. They

would then have to purchase the drug

from a registered nonprofit marijuana

dispensary. Location of dispensaries

continues to be a controversial subject

because many citizens do not want them

located in residential areas or near schools

Patients or their registered caregivers may

acquire up to two and a half (2.5) ounces

of medicinal marijuana in a two (2) week

period from a registered nonprofit medical

marijuana dispensary. If the patient resides

over twenty-five (25) miles from the

closest medical marijuana dispensary, the

caregiver or the patient can grow up to

twelve (12) marijuana plants in a locked,

enclosed facility.

Current DHS informal draft rules

punish violations by, amongst other

consequences, revoking a qualifying

patient’s or designated caregiver’s registry

identification card should the qualifying

patient or designated caregiver provide

medical marijuana to an individual who

is not authorized to possess medical

marijuana under the Arizona Medical

Marijuana Act. Depending on the

circumstances, criminal penalties may also

be applicable.

Persons who use marijuana for medicinal

purposes are not immune from Arizona’s

driving under the influence (DUI) laws.

Arizona DUI laws make it a crime to drive

a vehicle while under the influence of

marijuana. If a person is using medical

marijuana and can be shown to be under

its influence they are guilty of a DUI. The

problem is that chemical tests are not

always sufficiently accurate to determine

if there is enough marijuana in someone’s

blood to actually impair them. Unlike,

blood alcohol analysis wherein someone

with a blood alcohol content of .08 or

more is presumed impaired, Arizona

lawmakers have not yet established a

standard quantitative level of marijuana

that must be in a person’s blood for them

to be deemed impaired. Marijuana and it

metabolites can remain in an individual’s

bloodstream even though they are no

longer impaired by the drug.

For more information please contact us

at [email protected] or

visit our website at arizonadui.com.

Legalizing Marijuana: How it works.By: melanie Beauchamp

hen that special

moment happens, all

the preparation in the

world flies right out the

window. Your fiancé

may have stumbled

through his (or her…women are asking

these days, too) well-rehearsed proposal,

but he did manage to present you with

the diamond engagement ring of your

dreams. It was a sizeable investment, one

you’ll want to protect for reasons both

practical and sentimental.

Think for a moment about these heart-

stopping scenarios. The left finger you’ve

been staring at for months is suddenly

bare. Or, perhaps an intruder took off

with your jewelry box. Or, your ring is

scratched during a vigorous rock climb.

The earth’s most robust gemstone still

requires protection from theft, loss or

damage. Check out these tips to prevent

a disaster or mitigate your loss:

• Ask for an appraisal from a trusted

jeweler. Adjust for inflation by having the

piece re-appraised every 3-5 years.

• Take a photograph of your most precious

pieces. Store these, along with your

certificate of appraisals and receipts, in a

safe, secure place.

• Review your current homeowners/rental

policy. Most standard policies only cover

a small fraction of the cost of jewelry.

• After reviewing the policy, contact

your insurance provider to gain a further

understanding of how to insure your

jewelry. Determine your comfort

zone with a deductible.

• When not wearing your jewelry, establish

a safe and secure place for your pieces,

the more creative the better, but not SO

creative that you forget! Establishing a

routine of consistent care will help prevent

loss or damage.

Taking a few moments of your time

to ensure this significant investment is

protected for a lifetime will reap dividends

for years to come. Congratulations!

To Protect and PreserveDefending a Girl’s Best

Friend…For LifeBy: kevin Ham


Oh yes, we know them. Those people

that meet someone and after the 3rd

date they post on their social networking

page that they are “in a relationship”. A

couple of weeks pass, they have their first

fight, and hurriedly change their status

back to “single”. A few days later, the

couple reconciles and the status changes

back to “in a relationship”. This repeats

several times over the next few months

until they post “engaged”, then “single”,

then “it’s complicated”, then back to

“engaged”. Meanwhile… we’re reaching

for the Dramamine.

Announcing new and ending old relation-

ships on cyberspace has become a trend.

If iconic pop diva, Madonna, can do it, so

can we, it seems. After she declared the

end of her relationship with Jesus Luz over

the internet, Madonna took comments

from fans on the change in her status.

One fan Twittered, “Hello Madonna

honey am glad you are single again – you

made your best music as a single wom-

an!” To which she responded: “NOT AS

GLAD AS I AM!”

Before the existence of Facebook, Twitter

and the other social media sites, this kind

of semi-intimate relationship information

was usually shared exclusively with only

the closest friends and family. Today,

many people have no qualms about

broadcasting the highs and lows of their

love relationships all over the internet,

or at least to their 200 closest internet

friends. If they do have regrets about a

hasty relationship status change, well,

once it’s out there, it’s just that… out

there. The post could be removed, but

chances are, not in time to keep it from

being read. And, somehow, even while

having regrets about past relationship

postings, some people can’t seem to stop

themselves.

It seems clear that most of these change-

in-relationship-status postings are more

about the poster seeking revenge on, or

initiating a reaction from their (ex)lover

than anything else. They are a way to

say, “See… I’m moving on!” or, “I’m put-

ting myself back on the market!” or, “I’m

raising my hand in a single finger salute

to you!”

As for me, if my husband and I ever hit

the skids, I vow not to change my Face-

book status until I’m absolutely, positively,

unequivocally certain that we are finished

and over; then I’ll deliver him my single

finger salute in real space not cyber.

love on the (Social Networking) RocksBy Susan Brashears Wacker

The DeepEnd

Fashion Independent: The Original Style of Ann Bonfoey TaylorOpens February 28An impressive and personal collection of works by the most masterful fashion designers of the 1950s and 60s

DevouredMarch 12 & 13, 2011The Valley’s premier culinary event blends savory food from independent Phoenix restaurants, wine, and inspirational art

Théatre de la ModeOpens March 12Miniature mannequins created in 1944 and dressed in post WWII Parisian couture make their Southwest debut

Arts and FlowersMarch 31 – April 3, 2011Scores of breathtaking floral arrangements by more than 40 Valley floral designers accent art works on view in the galleries

u p c o m i n g e v e n t s

Try out the comfort of our dental office

FREESONICARE TOOTHBRUSH

to the first 25 NEW Patients

($100 Value!)480.339.7651Free Friendly Phone Advice

4206 E. Chandler Blvd. #20www.desertdentistry.com

Taking the time to make you comfortable.


Treasure the Moments...

Welcome to Our World!

Until Next Month...

PartingShot

We Care. We Listen. Call Us.Litigators: Criminal • Personal Injury • Civil

Twenty Years Legal Experience in Arizona • www.beauchamplawoffice.com

480.704.0777

Thank You, Ahwatukee...

...For making this a great place to live!

We would like to feature a random

act of kindness monthly. Please

help us to do so by identifying

those special individuals.

Email us at [email protected]

Documents

February 2011 - Tukee AZ