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In Part I of this series, Avoiding The Death and TaxesTwilight Zone, we discussed why over 90% of your
clients have not planned (and probably will not plan)for their own demise. In Part II, we profiled a newholistic planning approach that we call Living LegacyPlanning and urged professional advisors to view theirclients as more than just so much money and propertyto be handled and passed on to heirs. We introducedreaders to our graphic model of legacy, The LegacyCircleTM, and explained how all components of aperson's legacy are vitally important to individuals andtheir advisors as they struggle with these issues.
In Part III, we suggest ways you can use some ofthese ideas with your clients. Even advisors who do notwork full-time in the estate planning area can attractnew clients and create deeper, stronger relationshipswith existing clients by using these Living Legacyprinciples.
We all know what is at stake for wealthy clientswho, regardless of age, education or business savvy,have not planned. Many will be forced to sell (possiblysacrifice) the family's most easily liquidated assets −their stock and bond portfolios − to pay a seven- oreight-figure estate tax bill. The family's financialconsultant, an unwilling participant in such an theevent, will be able to offer little comfort to the familyby saying "But I tried to tell him . . . ."
Furthermore, after the taxman has been paid, thefinancial consultant may well lose what remains of thefamily portfolio when it passes to children or grand-children unless steps have been taken in advance toestablish a relationship with the younger generationfamily members.
We know that death awaits all of us at the end oflife's road, and yet the majority of us probably do nothave our affairs in order − just in case the journey endssooner than we think it will. As a self-diagnostic, askyourself why you haven't planned for the inevitable.Too far off in the future, you say? Now imagine you arein your 70s or 80s, and ask yourself the same question.Your death is too painful to contemplate, you say? Nowyou have an inkling of what your older clients feel, andwhy the "death-and-taxes" conversation inherent intraditional estate planning is so unpleasant and so oftenavoided.
Living Legacy Planning is a kinder, gentler alterna-tive to that conversation. It can be used to motivatepeople − especially seniors − to get their affairs inorder, as well as to establish relationships with youngerfamily members. The purpose of this article is not todiscuss in detail all the aspects of Living Legacy
Senior Consultant
Legacy Planning, Part III − Getting StartedKenneth B. Wheeler and Scott M. Farnsworth
Planning, but rather to show you some initial steps inthe process that you can try with your clients.
Before you attempt to use these steps with yourclients, we suggest you first review the components ofa person's legacy as depicted in The Legacy Circle.Second. Recognize that every client is a completelyunique, one-of-a-kind individual. No one before orsince has ever lived a life filled with the same experi-ences, influences and perceptions as the person sittingin front of you. Be sincere in your appreciation of thisuniqueness.
Step One:Ask the Right Questions, Then
Shut Up and Listen
You begin the Living Legacy process by encouragingpeople to tell you stories about their personal historyand family heritage, and then (and for some, this is thehard part) listening attentively and appreciatively towhat they have to say.
The power of sharing stories should not be underes-timated. Richard Stone, a nationally recognized expertin the use of stories in the business world to communi-cate, motivate and teach, has written: "Telling a story,especially about ourselves, may be one of the mostpersonal and intimate things we can do. Through story-telling we can come to know who we are in new andunforeseen ways. We can also reveal to others what isdeepest in our hearts and in the process, build bridges.The very act of sharing a story with another humanbeing contradicts the extreme isolation that character-izes so many of our lives."1
When we share this idea with professional advisors,we often encounter two types of skeptics. One groupscoffs at the notion that there is much professional rela-tionship value in hearing "old stories." These skepticsbelieve clients come to them for their keen minds andprofessional credentials. They see no need to developmore than a superficial relationship with a client. Theyattempt to build initial rapport with discussions ofcommon interests such as golf, tennis or fishing (orwhatever the client's hobbies may be) and then get rightdown to business.
The second group of skeptics believes that whilethere may be some value in having a client share his orher personal history and family heritage, as busyprofessionals they don't have the time "to waste on suchmatters." This is especially true for those advisors whobill by the hour and who feel pressure, either self-induced or from their firms, to produce billable hours.
The Voice of the Investment Management Consultant
February 2000, Vol. 3, No. 1
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To both groups we offer the observation that"no one cares how much you know until theyknow how much you care."
Rather than debate the merits or demerits ofthe Living Legacy process with either group,we simply say, try it! What do you have tolose? Select a few of your older clients orprospects, and ask them questions like: “Wheredid you grow up and what were things likethen? How did you come to live here? Whatwere some of the most challenging times ofyour life?" Ask a married couple, "Did both ofyou grow up in the same town? How did thetwo of you get together? What have youlearned in your time together?"
Ask a few follow-up questions aboutanything interesting they may have mentioned,but mostly, just listen. Put aside your ownagenda for a few minutes and really focus onthem and the uniqueness of their lives. See howtheir eyes light up while they are sharing theirstories. Notice the energy that expresses itselfin their body language. At some point in theconversation, share a brief story about an inci-dent in your own life, but then quickly turn theconversation back to them. Ask another open-ended question or two and then, when theyhave finished talking, thank them for havingshared their stories with you.
While a client is sharing stories about his orher personal history and family heritage, youmust listen with both your head and your heart.Those stories will reveal the storyteller's corevalue structure and deepest concerns, whetherabout money or any other subject. As a result,you will become uniquely qualified to adviseand counsel the client.
As with any new behavior, you may feelawkward or uncomfortable at first. We haveseen, however, that any advisor who tries thisexperiment three times will have at least oneincredibly powerful experience, an experiencethat will change the nature of his or her rela-tionship with the client (and in many cases, willchange the advisor too.) For a total investmentof zero dollars and a few minutes of time, theadvisor can lay the cornerstone of a foundationfor a long-term relationship with the client. Weknow it works because we have been using thisapproach with clients in our offices for the past18 months. The results have been truly remark-able.
Step Two:Explore What Your
Client's Legacy Might Include
For anyone in his twilight years, the issue of"legacy" becomes profoundly important. As wediscussed in the Part II of this series, peoplewant to know they have somehow made adifference in the world.
Unfortunately the focus of the financialservices community has for too long beenlimited to tax and wealth-related issues. As aresult, many people have come to think of theirlegacy only in terms of financial bequests. Butnotwithstanding this limited focus and themarketing barrage spawned by the demo-graphic realities of the "Age Wave," mostseniors realize that their legacy can and shouldconsist of more than money and property.Many feel the non-financial aspects of theirlegacy are as important − if not more important− than financial bequests. They have seenadverse impact that inherited (unearned)wealth can have on heirs and their families,sometimes referred to as affluenza.2
The idea that one's legacy is more thanwealth resonates deeply with most seniors.They often express a deep sense of appreciationto the professional advisor who shares theirunderstanding of this insight. The LegacyCircle is one way to explore this concept withthem.
As we share stories and discuss The LegacyCircle with clients, we encourage them to thinkabout their legacy in a more holistic sense. This
exchange is often lively and sometimes liber-ating for them.
The discussion of personal history andfamily heritage also makes it easier to identifythe range of concerns clients may have. Onceuncovered, these concerns can then be priori-tized and addressed in the planning process.When clients understand the problems at handand trust that their advisor will present solu-tions consistent with their objectives, valuesand beliefs, they are much more likely tofollow the advice given by the advisor.
Step Three:Explore the Implications of
Losing the Lessons of a Lifetime
You can generate enormous good will bysimply taking the time to listen attentively toclients' stories. Clients recognize and appre-ciate someone who makes the effort to see theworld through their eyes. If you do nothingmore with these ideas, you will benefit greatlyand so will your clients.
The real power of building relationshipscomes, however, when you guide your clients
The Legacy Circle
S E N I O R C O N S U L T A N T
someday guide and comfort their loved ones asthey travel life's road.
ConclusionFor us, the steps outlined above lead our
clients naturally into Living Legacy planning, aprocess which is far more encompassing thantraditional estate planning. For you, the profes-sional financial consultant, these steps will leadjust as naturally into broader, deeper and moremeaningful personal and financial relationshipswith your clients and prospects. In the finalanalysis, we believe clients respond to profes-sional advisors who see them (and who helpthem see themselves) as unique and significanthuman beings.
In life, the past links with the present andeventually meets the future. This is what legacyis about: honoring the uniqueness of a person;celebrating a life well lived; and using theaccumulated resources of a person's life tobuild bridges for those who follow.
An advisor who implements the LivingLegacy process and takes the time to reallylisten to and understand a client, can providecreative solutions tailored to the client's uniquecircumstances, needs and objectives. He or shequickly becomes one of the client's mosttrusted advisors. Over time, this relationshipwill lead to referrals from the client, larger feesfor the advisor and the opportunity to connectwith the client's heirs. The advisor, in effect,becomes a catalyst as clients review a life welllived and set about to harvest and preserve theirunique legacy for posterity. It is as RobinWilliams' character, Patch Adams, advocates,much to the annoyance of his colleagues,"When you treat the patient instead of thedisease, you almost always win."
About the AuthorsKenneth B. Wheeler, JD, LLM Tax, and
Scott M. Farnsworth , JD, CFP, areWealthCareTM attorneys in the Winter Parkarea of Orlando, Florida. Their company,Family Legacy Institute, Inc., trains organiza-tions and professional advisors to use the prin-ciples of Living Legacy planning in thedevelopment of collaborative, long-term rela-tionships with clients. For additional informa-tion, contact them at (407) 645-1779, or visittheir internet web site at www. family legacyinstitute.com.
Notes1Stone, Richard. (1996) The Healing Art of
Storytelling. Hyperion Press, p. 3.2Affluenza refers to the liabilities attached to
inherited wealth. The money that buys power,privileges and luxuries can just as easilydamage a child’s self-concept and motivationto achieve The Whitman Institute.
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to the understanding that the unique signifi-cance of their lives is important enough topreserve and pass on to their families andcommunities. We believe one of the most valu-able treasures people have to leave is a store-house of lessons, insights, understanding andwisdom accumulated over a lifetime. Thistreasure is fragile and may be lost either gradu-ally over a period of years, or suddenly as theresult of death or mental incapacity. Fewpeople give much thought to the implicationsof losing the lessons of a lifetime until such atragic event occurs.
This oversight presents an opportunity foradvisors to be of additional service to clients.An advisor who recognizes the importance ofsuch information to the client, and also helpspreserve it for future generations, will earn aposition of enormous influence and trust withthe client as well as with the client's family.
Many seniors are humble or modest andtend to minimize the significance of their lives.But when given a little encouragement andreassurance, they begin to recognize the impor-tance of preserving their wisdom and insight.They come to realize that loved ones or evenmembers of their community may somedayneed and cherish the intellectual legacy theyhave left them.
Step Four: Help Your ClientsPrepare a Declaration of Their Own
Personal Legacy
Once clients recognize the importance ofpreserving their life wisdom (or the cost offailing to do so), we help them harvest thespecial things they want to preserve. One of theways we do this is in the form of a documentwe call a Personal Legacy DeclarationTM. Thisis a written declaration of their personal values,their beliefs and the lessons they have learnedfrom their life's experience. The tradition ofleaving one's heirs an intellectual testament, or"ethical will" as it is called in the Jewishculture, has its roots in the Old Testament. Wehave found the preparation of this document tobe a capstone event in the creation of a relation-ship with a client.
Getting started, as most authors know, isoften the hardest part of any writing project, sowe often "ghost" the initial draft of the client'sPersonal Legacy Declaration. The client fillsout a short questionnaire, and their responses,together with our interview notes, are then usedto prepare the first rough draft. Using our draftas a starting point, the client can then edit thedocument and add more personal thoughts.Once begun, the process usually has a naturalflow. When clients understand the premise that"words from the heart, enter the heart," they getover their reluctance to express themselves inwriting. They understand that their words will