Essay Mini-Outline:Thesis:

Through point of view and characterization, Richard Peck’s story, “Priscilla and the Wimps,” promotes the idea that bullies gain their power through the cowardice of others.

Main Point #1: (will become topic sentence # 1): The perspective of the narrator supports the reader’s understanding of Monk’s complete control of the school and the unwillingness of the students to defend themselves.

Quote #1: “I admit it. I'm five foot five, and when the Kobras slithered by, with or without Monk, I shrank. And I admit this, too: I paid up on a regular basis. And I might add: so would you” (Peck 1).

Quote #2: “we were all grabbing our coats out of our lockers. And hurrying, since Klutter's Kobras made sweeps of the halls for after-school shakedowns” (Peck 1).

Main Point #2: (will become topic sentence 2):Only one character displays courage and finally breaks Monk’s hold on the school.

Quote #1: “Nobody's ever laid a finger on a Kobra, let alone a hand the size of Priscilla's” (Peck 2).

Quote #2: “Then Priscilla, who hardly every says anything to anybody except to Melvin, says to the Kobra, ‘Who's your leader, wimp’”(Peck 2)?

SAMPLE PARAGRAPH: ADDED COMMENTARY FROM SHAPING THE ESSAY

The perspective of the narrator supports the reader’s understanding of Monk’s complete control of the school and the unwillingness of the students to defend themselves. The narrator freely “admits” his own cowardice in “pay[ing] up on a regular basis” and is convinced that the reader would do the same thing (Peck 1). In his mind, the only way to survive is to submit to the will of the bully and his gang. His cowardice and the silent agreement that exists among the students at the school allows seven people to have total control over hundreds of students. At the end of the school day when everyone “grab[s] coats out of [their] lockers,” there are plenty of people to rebel against Monk’s control; however, they “hurr[y], since Klutter’s Kobras ma[k]e sweeps of the hall” to collect more money (Peck 1). Again, the reader can see the missed opportunity for students to act in concert in great numbers, but they give in to fear. Their desire to “go along to get along” gives Monk his power and solidifies his position in control of their every resource and move during the school day. Fortunately for the narrator, Monk’s position of power wasn’t intended to last forever.