NO CHILD DESERVES TO BE A STATISTIC

Especially A Tragic One

National Anti-Bullying Month is October

A Time To Raise Awareness about Anti-Bullying Efforts

Bullying is taking a different approach with cyber bullying becoming more and more rampant in school and after school.

Cyber Bullying- bullying through email, instant messaging, in a chat room, on a Web-site, or through digital messages or images sent to a cell phone.

Social Networking has provided an entirely new environment for bullying to take place.

Bullying

Teens Popular AcronymsGetting Familiar with Today’s Language

CD9 – Parents are around LOL – Laughing out loud MorF – Male or Female Noob – Often an insult to somebody who

doesn’t know much about something. GNOC – Get naked on camera (webcam) (L)MIRL – (let’s) meet in real life MOS – Mom over shoulder PIR – Parents in room PRW – Parents are watching TDTM – Talk dirty to me.

Bully Statistics

160,000 kids stayed home today because they are afraid of being bullied.

61% of students said they believe students shoot others at school because they have been victims of physical violence at home or at school.

Bully Statistics

About 56% of all students have witnessed a bullying crime take place while at school.

71% of students report bullying as an on- going problem.

Bully Statistics

1 out of every 10 students drops out or changes school because of repeated bullying.

1 out of every 20 students has seen a student with a gun at school

Source:ehow.com

Bullycide Statistics Suicide continues to be one of the leading causes

of death among children under the age of 14 Bullycide – is a term used to describe suicide as a

result of bullying. Suicide rates are continuing to grow among adolescents, and have grown more than 50% in the past 30 years.

Bullying can include various types of behavior from physical attacks, to destroying one’s personal property or clothing, verbal abuse, starting rumors, name calling, verbal attacks online.

Source: bullying statistics.org

11 Facts About Bullying1. Over 3.2 million students are victims of bullying

each year.2. 1 in 4 teachers see nothing wrong with bullying

and will only intervene 4% of the time.3. 1 in 7 students in grades K-12 is either a bully or a

victim of bullying.4. Approximately 160,000 teens skip school every

day because of bullying.5. 56% of students have personally witnessed some

type of bullying at school.6. Over two-thirds of students believe that schools

respond poorly to bullying with a high percentage of students believing that adult help is infrequent and ineffective.

11 Facts About Bullying (cont.)

7. 71% of students report incidents of bullying as a problem at their school.

8. 90 % of 4th through 8th graders report being victims of bullying.

9. 1 out of 10 students drop out of school because of repeated bullying.

10. Harassment and bullying have been linked to 75% of school-shooting incidents.

11. Physical bullying increases in elementary school, peaks in middle school and declines in high school. Verbal abuse, on the other hand, remains constant.

Source: www.dosomething.org

Bullied to Death at 15Kristina Calco

Why Bullies Bully?

Most common theories suggest that bullies primarily want to gain status among their peers.

Two needs underlie this drive for status 1. Need for Popularity2. Need for Domination

Bullies who primarily desire Popularity seek out victims who have been rejected by their peers.

Bullies who primarily desire Domination look for victims that are vulnerable and unable to defend themselves.

They seek victims who can be dominated easily and who ideally won’t tell anyone.

Contrary to what people belief, bullies often have high self esteem.

Bullies can lose their moral compass when driven by their peers

Simple reason is it shows they have power over others.

The reason they do it repeatedly is because they are getting away with it.

Nobody is calling them on their bad behavior When they aren’t called on it they think it’s OK. Evidence shows that bullies often suffer from social

and emotional problems

A Big Myth

Is that bullies bully because they feel bad about themselves.

Research shows that they have average or above average self-esteem.

Research also emphasizes parents play a role,

“If parents are modeling Aggression kids might learn that.”

Reality is that we’re not talking to kids early enough and long enough about bullying and healthy relationships.

What are the Warning Signs that a Child is Being Bullied?

Decline in quality of academic performance Seems happy on weekends but unhappy and preoccupied or

tense on Sundays. Sudden decrease in school attendance or skipping certain

classes. Sudden lack of interest in school-supported activities and

events. Uses “victim” body language: hunches shoulders, hangs head,

will not look people in the eye, and backs off from others. Suddenly prefers the company of adults. Suddenly develops a stammer or stutter. Carries protection devices (knife, box opener, fork, gun) Possessions (books, money, clothing) are often “lost,”

damaged, or destroyed without an explanation.

Effects of Bullying on the Target

Stomach aches Weight loss Headaches Drop in grades Drug or alcohol use Sexual Activity Physical Aggression Suicidal

Alienation Low self esteem Insecurity FEAR Depression Withdrawn Anger Vengeful

Source: HRSA

How Are Boys and Girls Different In Their Bullying?

Both boys and girls use verbal aggression mocking name-calling teasing mean telephone calls, verbal threats of aggression

intimidation graffiti publicly challenging someone to do something playing a dirty trick taking possessions coercion

Boy Bullies:

Boys bully both boys and girls (Olweus, 1993).

Boys use more direct behaviors (physical and verbal bullying) than girls do.

They usually use more indirect bullying as their verbal skills increase (Mullin-Rindler, 2002

Boys use more physical aggression Boys are just as likely as girls to use

social and emotional taunting.

Girl Bullies:

Girls are aggressive, and use more indirect behaviors to damage relationships and can be sneaky and nasty.

Girls are becoming more physical in bullying than in the past.

Girls bully in groups more than boys. Girls seek to inflict psychological pain on their

victims, which hurts as much as, if not more than,

Girls frequently make comments regarding the sexual behavior of girls they don’t like (Byrne, 1994a, 1994b).

Source: Bullyfree.com/free-resources/facts-about-bullying

There Are Various Reasons Why People Bully

Cultural Causes of Bullying – Our culture is fascinated with winning, power and violence.

Researchers point to World Wrestling Federation

(WWF) as glorification of bullies in the name of entertainment.

Institutional Causes – If the institution at which the bullying takes place – whether the home, the school. Or the workplace- does not have high standards for the way people treat each other then bullying may be more likely.

There Are Various Reasons Why People Bully (cont.)

Social Issues – The fact that one gets more recognition for negative behaviors than for positive ones can contribute to reasons why people bully.

Family Issues – Families that are not warm and loving and in which feelings are not shared are more likely to have children who bully.

  Another environment that is prone to producing

bullies is one where discipline and monitoring is inconsistent.

Source: findarticles.com

We Ask Why?

So, Why do people Bully? There are many reasons, but one thing is clear regardless of why people bully, any type of bullying needs to come to an end.

Source: findarticles.com

Possible reasons for being bullied

The bully or the target are either smaller or bigger than most kids their age.

The target may be a minority.  May have a disability. Maybe you have a name that is not

ordinary. Source: www.pbskids.org/its my life

What to do in the Moment

Ignore them

• Pretend you didn’t hear them

• Don’t look at them

Don’t cry

• Don’t show them that you are upset

• Don’t get angry

Talk about it to someone

• Write it down so you don’t forget to tell someone

• Respond to the Bully evenly and firmly

•Remove yourself from the Situation

Turn the comment into a

joke

•Go somewhere that an adult is present

•Talk to an Adult

Turn and walk away

•The bully is the one with the problem

Remember you are not the One

with the problem

Why Must Bullying Stop?

It is more prevalent today than in the past and occurs in more serious forms today.

The intensity of bullying has increased because more students join in.

There have been numerous criminal cases because of bullying

It creates a fearful school It is a common theme in school shootings as

students retaliate for the bullying. It causes stress in studnets. It causes “toxic” shame,” which is destructive to

one’s sense of worth (Garbarino, 1999)

Why Must Bullying Stop? (cont.)

It causes some students to harm themselves, cutting themselves, for example.

Thirty percent of all child suicides can be directly related to bullying (Hawker & Boulton, 2000).

It encourages students to run away from home, when they are rejected at home and school.

It encourages gang membership. It encourages teen pregnancies. Rejected girls may

seek someone to love. It contributes to poor school attendance. Hostile children are more likely to develop diabetes

and develop cardiac problems as they age.

What Are The Signs That My Child Is A Bully

Look for: Impulsive Behavior A desire to always

be in control Showing little or no

empathy for others Source:bullyfree.com/

freeresources

Bully Proof your Child Help them develop a sense of

self.

Encourage them to learn about themselves and learn and excel being exactly who they are.

Encourage your child to explore activities that make them feel good about themselves.

Encourage courageous behavior “stand up for themselves as well as their peer and friends.

Source: Cnn.com

Peace Is Popular…Bully Is Not

Our Lives Should Be More To Do With Beauty and Less To Do With Pain…….

Make the Best of Each Day