Dick Whittington

Dick Whittington & His Cat

Act 1 Prologue (Fairyland) As the lights come up on Fairyland, we are greeted to the sight of FAIRY BOWBELLS in her majestic glory. FAIRY: Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls and welcome to Fairyland. Its so exciting, dont you think? Its magical, glittery and grand. In case you dont already know, my name is Fairy Bowbells, yes indeed My job is to help tell this glorious tale and move it along with speed. In old London Town, theres a young boy named Dick Whittington Hes searching the streets paved with gold Hes a brave boy, courageous and very bold. But alas, our young Dick will have no luck The streets arent paved with gold for thats just a myth It does indeed suck, doesnt it, boys and girls? (Audience response) However, if our hero manages to end up In the right place at the right time He shall be alright and become Lord Mayor with the clocks chime.

Now, I cant stand here all day, wittering on at you Theres far too much to be done. So off well go to London Town with the dawn and the rising sun. The lights fade into London Town.

Scene One (London Town) As the lights rise on London Town, we see the VILLAGERS and ALDERMAN FITZWARREN, who is looking very splendid.

MUSICQ2: BRING ME SUNSHINE INTRO ALDERMAN: Roll up, roll up, ladies and gentlemen. Welcome to good old London

Town where I, the one, the only, Alderman Fitzwarren am willing to grant the citizens of my humble town a fifty percent reduction in my store for one day and one day only. So pop on by Fitzwarrens Fantasy Store and see what delights await before your very eyes.

ALICE FITZWARREN enters.

MUSICQ1: OVERTURE/INTRO

MUSICQ2: BRING ME SUNSHINE INTRO

ALICE: Father, youre looking very jovial today. I havent seen you this happy since that wicked King Rat vanished from the land.

ALDERMAN: Life is becoming perfect once more, my dear. I have my dream job, my own store and a beautiful daughter. What more could I wish for?

MUSICQ3: BRING ME SUNSHINE ALDERMAN: BRING ME SUNSHINE IN YOUR SMILE

BRING ME LAUGHTER ALL THE WHILE, IN THIS WORLD WHERE WE LIVE THERE SHOULD BE MORE HAPPINESS SO MUCH JOY YOU CAN GIVE TO EACH BRAND NEW BRIGHT TOMORROW.

ALL: MAKE ME HAPPY THROUGH THE YEARS,

NEVER BRING ME ANY TEARS LET YOUR ARMS BE AS WARM AS THE SUN FROM UP ABOVE BRING ME FUN, BRING ME SUNSHINE, BRING ME LOVE. BRING ME SUNSHINE IN YOUR EYES BRING ME RAINBOWS FROM THE SKIES LIFES TOO SHORT TO BE SPENT HAVING ANYTHING BUT FUN WE CAN BE SO CONTENT IF WE GATHER LITTLE SUNBEAMS. BE LIGHT-HEARTED ALL DAY LONG, KEEP ON SINGING HAPPY SONGS LET YOUR ARMS BE AS WARM AS THE SUN FROM UP ABOVE BRING ME FUN, BRING ME SUNSHINE, BRING ME LOVE BRING ME FUN, BRING ME SUNSHINE, BRING ME LOVE!

After the merry dance, the VILLAGERS return to their business and ALDERMAN and ALICE continue. ALDERMAN: Wholl be first to step into Fitzwarrens Fantasy Store? ALICE: I will father. ALDERMAN: My dear, you already live there. ALICE: Oh, well, Im sure we can find somebody wholl come and look at a nice bargain. ALDERMAN: I wonder who MUSICQ4: DAME SARAH SPONGES ENTRANCE SARAH enters in spectacular dame fashion, in an extremely overlarge frock. DAME: Hello mums and dads, boys and girls. (Audience response) Come on,

Im sure you all can do much better than that. Hello mums and dads, boys and girls. (Audience response) I tell you what, lets shake it up a bit. Hello boys and girls. (Audience response) Fantastic, right up there with the best of them. Now for the grown-ups. Hello mums and dads. (Audience response) Oh dear, you are sounding very repressed

MUSICQ3: BRING ME SUNSHINE

MUSICQ4: DAME SARAH SPONGES ENTRANCE

tonight. But never mind, onwards and upwards. My name is Sarah Sponge, middle name: Victoria! I work in Fitzwarrens Fantasy Store baking all the delicious treats youll find there. Im the Mary Berry of panto-land!

ALDERMAN: Ive sampled many of her delights. DAME: Of course you have, you cheeky thing! ALDERMAN: Now Alice, could you please go and fetch me my accounts? ALICE: Yes father, certainly. (She exits) ALDERMAN: Now Sarah, we need to have serious words. DAME: Oh lord. ALDERMAN: Its about Jack. I feel lately that hes starting to become complacent. DAME: Well the clue is in the name Alderman. ALDERMAN: What do you mean? DAME: He is called Idle Jack, sir. Idle. Idle Jack. IDLE JACK bounds on thinking hes been called. IDLE JACK: Who called for me? DAME: Nobody dear. We were talking about you instead. IDLE JACK: Oh thats really nice isnt it? Talking about somebody behind their back.

I have feelings, you know. DAME: Ooo, feelings for me? IDLE JACK: Sorry to disappoint you Sarah but not those type of feelings. DAME: Rejected! ALDERMAN: If we could get back down to business. Jack, whats going on lately?

Hardly any of the store jobs are getting done. IDLE JACK: Well, you see, the thing is Im always so tired. ALDERMAN: You do realise that if you dont buck up your ideas, youll be out. IDLE JACK: I understand Alderman. Ill try my best. ALDERMAN: Very well my boy. I best be off and see whats taking Alice so long with

my accounts. (He exits) IDLE JACK: Sarah, theres something Ive been meaning to tell you. DAME: Righto. IDLE JACK: Well, Ive been wondering whether I should get myself a new job. DAME: Righto. IDLE JACK: So I was thinking I might put in an application for Tesco. DAME: Righto. IDLE JACK: Sarah, why do you keep saying righto? DAME: Because youre stood on my right toe. IDLE JACK: Oh, sorry Sarah. DAME: You will be if youre not careful. Now, have you done your chores? IDLE JACK: What chores? DAME: Oh deary me. Jack, you were supposed to hoover the store as well as

ensuring that the bins are put out. Its collection day. IDLE JACK: Well, do you want the true answer or the false answer? DAME: (To audience) He really is silly at times. (To Jack) I want the false

answer. IDLE JACK: Really? DAME: No you fool! Of course I want the truth. IDLE JACK: Well, I just couldnt really be bothered.

DAME: Its a good job your names Idle. DICK WHITTINGTON enters. DAME: Oh look, a newcomer to the town! (Approaches DICK) Hello there

handsome. DICK: Oh hello. Im Dick. DAME: Youre a what? DICK: No, my dear lady, my name is Dick Whittington and Ive come to

London as Ive heard the streets are paved with gold. Ive come to get my fortune.

DAME: Im sorry, my lad, but the streets arent paved with gold. Its just a wise old tale.

DICK: So Ive come all this way for nothing? DAME: Im afraid so. The CAT enters, skulking around followed by ALDERMAN and ALICE. ALDERMAN is chasing the cat. ALDERMAN: Whats this cat doing here? Get away, vermin! ALICE: Father, its only a cat. Its not vermin. More like the rats! ALDERMAN: Ah but I still dont like it sniffing around my store. It could do any

manner of things. DAME: All youve got to do is treat it kindly and itll treat you kindly back. ALDERMAN: Whos this boy whos just strolled in? DICK: Im Dick Whittington. Nice to meet you sir. ALDERMAN: Very good my boy. Now, does anybody know what can be done about

this cat? IDLE JACK: Maybe its lost and cant find its way home. It makes me feel ever so

sad. DAME: Pull yourself together. ALICE: I reckon we need to find out who the cat is. DICK: (Approaching the cat) Hello. CAT: Meow. DAME: Whats that supposed to mean? I dont speak Cat-anese. DICK: Whats your name? CAT: Meow. Meow. DICK: Barry? CAT: Meow. Meow. DAME: Mildred? CAT: Meow. Meow. IDLE JACK: Spartacus? CAT: Meow. Meow. ALDERMAN: Polly? CAT: Meow. Meow. ALICE: Its a name similar to Polly. Shake the head for male, nod for female. CAT: (Shakes his head) ALICE: A male cat. How about Terry? CAT: Meow. Meow. ALDERMAN: Were getting closer.

DICK: Tommy? CAT: Meow. Meow. DICK: His names Tommy. Tommy the cat. DAME: Well, we got there in the end! DICK: And I think Tommys lost. Look at him! Very thin and frail. CAT: Meow. Meow. DICK: There must be something we can do. IDLE JACK: Why dont we feed Tommy up inside and then we can send him on his

way? DAME: An excellent idea. Ill give you that one Jack. Top form! ALDERMAN: Whats news with you Dick? What lies ahead for you? DICK: I cant head home now. Ive come so far. I guess Ill have to find

somewhere to stay for tonight. I best head off before it gets dark. ALICE: Wait! Im sure Dick can stay with us here at the store? What do you

say, father? ALDERMAN: Ill think about it. ALICE: Oh please father. Go on. It cant do any harm, surely? ALDERMAN: Very well. Dick, you may stay at the store however youll have to find a

place to rest your head. On one of the counters or something. Also, Im looking for an apprentice. I think youd be perfect for the job, Dick.

DICK: Are you sure Alderman? ALDERMAN: Indeed else I wouldnt have suggested it. DICK: Very well, Ill take it! Theres a flash and KING RAT appears surrounded by his villainous rat gang. KING RAT: Bow and grovel, bow and grovel. I said bow and grovel! DAME: Excuse me, King Rat, I thought youd disappeared from the land. Or

should I say, banished. KING RAT: Did you really think youd keep me away for this long? Your simple

feeble minds arent a match for I, King Rat, am the greatest of them all. DICK: Whos King Rat? ALDERMAN: The most evil rat this side of London. Always threatening to devour the

inhabitants of the town as well as ensuring that both him and his rat gang overthrow London Town and take control of the population.

KING RAT: And how easy it shall be. Not before very long, I shall take control and become Lord Mayor of London and all peasants will be in my power.

DAME: Id rather die than be under your control King Rat. ALICE: Youre a wicked rat who deserves punishment for the terrible things

youve put upon our land. KING RAT: Oh boo hoo! Whilst you think, by shouting at me, that youll get your

own way, I can safely say you wont, not while Im around. DICK: Then well just have to get rid of you wont we? One way or another. KING RAT: Is that a threat, young boy? If youre feeling so brave as to take me on

then tell me your name. DICK: Im Dick Whittington. I came to London to seek my fortune. Id heard

the streets were paved with gold but found that to be untrue. However, Im going to be sticking around for a little while longer and I shant let you terrorise these poor people.

KING RAT: Oh yeah? And who exactly is going to defeat us?

DICK: Tommy! Chase after them. MUSICQ5: RAT CHASE There is a rat chase as TOMMY chases KING RAT and his gang. The others watch in amazement at the scene unfolding before them. KING RAT: Quick, my lovely rats, scarper! KING RAT and his rat gang disappear rather quickly. TOMMY bounces back onto stage with a hearty meow. DICK: Well done Tommy. DAME: Youve certainly done us proud. ALDERMAN: What an extraordinary cat to chase off all those nasty creatures!

Tommy can definitely say with us here at the store for as long as he needs to. Now I best be heading off, theres lots to be done today to ensure all goes swell. Tommy, if you follow me I can give you a good feed. Tata my peeps!

ALDERMAN exits followed by TOMMY bounding along behind him. DAME: Well I guess I should make a start with some baking. ALICE: Oh Sarah, what are you going to be baking today? DAME: My original Victoria Sponge, my dear. After all, Im named after it. I

should have known Id grow to be a lover of cakes. IDLE JACK: And I can tell you enjoy eating them as well. DAME: You watch it, Jack. Youre going the right way for a smacked bottom.

As for that remark, you can come and be my assistant for the day. Right, Ill see you all later.

SARAH and JACK exit leaving DICK and ALICE by themselves. ALICE: So, Dick, how are you finding London? DICK: Its not a bad place. Not bad at all. However, if Im being honest, I was

hoping for it to be a bit more exciting. ALICE: Dont worry Dick. With Fitzwarrens Fantasy Store opening today, Im

sure London is going to be bustling with both people and activities. There was something I wanted to tell you as a matter of fact.

DICK: Certainly Alice. ALICE: I dont know its like theres this strange connection between us as if

weve known each other all our lives, but we cant have done for weve only just met. I felt it when I first laid eyes on you.

DICK: Thats weird Alice. Ive got the same feeling. ALICE: I think this could be the start of something very special. MUSICQ: SOMETHING I NEED DICK: I HAD A DREAM THE OTHER NIGHT

ABOUT HOW WE ONLY GET ONE LIFE

MUSICQ5: RAT CHASE

WOKE ME UP RIGHT AFTER TWO STAYED AWAKE AND STARED AT YOU SO I WOULDN'T LOSE MY MIND AND I HAD THE WEEK THAT CAME FROM HELL AND YES I KNOW THAT YOU COULD TELL BUT YOU'RE LIKE THE NET UNDER THE LEDGE WHEN I GO FLYING OFF THE EDGE YOU GO FLYING OFF AS WELL AND IF YOU ONLY DIE ONCE I WANNA DIE WITH YOU GOT SOMETHING I NEED IN THIS WORLD FULL OF PEOPLE THERE'S ONE KILLING ME AND IF WE ONLY DIE ONCE, (HEY) I WANNA DIE WITH YOU (YOU, YOU, YOU) YOU GOT SOMETHING I NEED IN THIS WORLD FULL OF PEOPLE THERE'S ONE KILLING ME AND IF WE ONLY DIE ONCE, (HEY) I WANNA DIE WITH YOU (YOU, YOU)

ALICE: LAST NIGHT I THINK I DRANK TOO MUCH, YEAH

CALL IT OUR TEMPORARY CRUTCH, HEY WITH BROKEN WORDS I'VE TRIED TO SAY HONEY DON'T YOU BE AFRAID IF WE GOT NOTHING WE GOT US (YEAH) AND IF YOU ONLY DIE ONCE I WANNA DIE WITH YOU GOT SOMETHING I NEED IN THIS WORLD FULL OF PEOPLE THERE'S ONE KILLING ME AND IF WE ONLY DIE ONCE, (HEY) I WANNA DIE WITH YOU (YOU, YOU, YOU) YOU GOT SOMETHING I NEED IN THIS WORLD FULL OF PEOPLE THERE'S ONE KILLING ME AND IF WE ONLY DIE ONCE, (HEY) I WANNA DIE WITH YOU (YOU, YOU, YOU)

BOTH: AND IF WE ONLY DIE ONCE, (HEY) I WANNA DIE WITH YOU! The lights fade down on DICK and ALICE as they share a loving hug.

Scene Two (King Rats Dungeon) As the lights rise on King Rats Dungeon, it is repulsive and full of horrid objects. It is very dark and dim. KING RAT comes into view sat in his royal throne. MUSICQ7: TRANSITION INTO KING RATS DUNGEON KING RAT: (Singing) LIVING IN THE SUNLIGHT, LOVING IN THE MOONLIGHT

HAVING A WONDERFUL TIME (Noticing the audience) Oh its you lot! Who gave you permission to fix your eyes upon my dungeon? Still,

it is lovely, wouldnt you agree? (Audience response) Oh yes it is. (Audience response, to and fro) Its strange, when you think about it, how as rightful ruler of London, I am despicably treated. Does nobody ever care about how my rats and I have had to live for centuries? Its all the humans. Those poor, poor humans with their feeble ways and humble opinions always trying to get the sympathy vote. But nobody ever takes a moment to think about us rats, especially I, King Rat. My life has been one full of misery and despair. And yet nobody bats an eyelid or cares to listen to me. Still, I must remain strong and keep pushing through the hard times, like this

MUSICQ8: LIVING IN THE SUNLIGHT KING RAT: I'M SO HAPPY!

AHA! HAPPY GO LUCKY ME! I JUST GO MY WAY, LIVING EVERYDAY! I DON'T WORRY! WORRYING DON'T AGREE, THINGS THAT BOTHER YOU, NEVER BOTHER ME! THINGS THAT BOTHER YOU, NEVER BOTHER ME I FEEL HAPPY AND FINE! AHA! LIVING IN THE SUNLIGHT, LOVING IN THE MOONLIGHT HAVING A WONDERFUL TIME! HAVEN'T GOT A LOT, I DON'T NEED A LOT COFFEE'S ONLY A DIME LIVING IN THE SUNLIGHT, LOVING IN THE MOONLIGHT, HAVING A WONDERFUL TIME! JUST TAKE IT FROM ME, I'M JUST AS FREE AS ANY DAUGHTER. I DO WHAT I LIKE, JUST WHAT I LIKE, AND HOW I LOVE IT! I'M RIGHT HERE TO STAY WHEN I'M OLD AND GRAY, I'LL BE RIGHT IN MY PRIME! LIVING IN THE SUNLIGHT, LOVING IN THE MOONLIGHT, HAVING A WONDERFUL TIME!

JUST TAKE IT FROM ME, I'M JUST AS FREE AS ANY DAUGHTER. I DO WHAT I LIKE, JUST WHAT I LIKE, AND HOW I LOVE IT! I'M RIGHT HERE TO STAY, WHEN I'M OLD AND GRAY, I'LL BE RIGHT IN MY PRIME, LIVING IN THE SUNLIGHT, LOVING IN THE MOONLIGHT, HAVING A WONDERFUL TIME! It is wonderful being a rat! Now, we must get down to the matter at hand. That young Dick took a step too far trying to get one over on me. Therefore he shall have to go and I have just the plan. When theyre all sleeping in that puny little store of theirs, I shall stumble my way in, steal the Aldermans petty cash and flee the scene before anybody finds out who the culprit is. When Dick wakes, theyll all think its he who has stolen the money. Oh, this is too perfect and theres not a moment to lose. I must make haste and before very long, those suffering fools will be throwing Dick out on his ear, the unfortunate boy. Hell be heartbroken. But life goes on, doesnt it and one day soon I shall rule London Town.

Blackout.

Scene Three (Inside Fitzwarrens Fantasy Store) The lights rise up on Fitzwarrens Fantasy Store. The stage is separated into two parts for this scene: one half is the main body of the store, the other half is the kitchen. To begin with, ALDERMAN FITZWARREN and ALICE are situated in the main body of the store. ALDERMAN: Bargains galore. Such wonders to behold! Why, my dear, Ive just sold

a rather fine looking pearl necklace for just 10.99. ALICE: Thats awfully cheap, isnt it father? ALDERMAN: Nonsense my dear. When youve been in business as long as I have,

you really understand how to pull off a bargain. After all, the customer is always right.

ALICE: Except for when they rip you off father. You do realise that by giving the customer exactly want they want, youre gaining very little money.

ALDERMAN: Oh bother, I have been a bit of a fool.

DAME: Time to get a move on with my spiffing Victoria Sponge. Now, Jack, you do everything I say and nothing will go wrong. Understood?

IDLE JACK: Completely understood, maam. DAME: Dear Jack, why are you calling me maam? IDLE JACK: Well its like being back at school isnt it? I always loved cooking class. DAME: Very well, you may call me whatever you like as long as you dont call

me late for dinner. Now, Jack, can you pass me the flour? JACK produces DAME with a flower, not flour. DAME: What am I supposed to do with that, silly boy? The self-raising flour is

what Im after. IDLE JACK: Oh right, that type of flour. JACK passes her the flour which she measures and puts into the bowl. DAME: Next Im going to need four eggs. Bring them over here for me and

separate them. JACK brings them over and separates them into two eggs on one side of the table and the other two on the opposite side. DAME: No Jack. Separate them into the bowl! IDLE JACK: Oh right! Im not a total fool. DAME: Not a total one, no. ALDERMAN: The futures looking bright!

MUSICQ: BARGAINS TO BE HAD (TUNE: KNEES UP MOTHER BROWN) BARGAINS TO BE HAD, BARGAINS TO BE HAD STEP RIGHT UP AND TAKE A LOOK JUST LIKE THIS AMAZING BOOK IF I CATCH YOU STEALING ILL SAW YOUR NOSE RIGHT OFF HANDS IN YOUR POCKETS, FINGERS IN THE SOCKETS BARGAINS TO BE HAD! COOKIES, COOKIES BY THE SCORE THEY ARE REALLY LUSH, THE OPPOSITE OF MUSH FOR JUST ONE POUND TWENTY THREE DELICIOUS TREATS FOR YOU AND ME! BARGAINS TO BE HAD, BARGAINS TO BE HAD STEP RIGHT UP AND TAKE A LOOK

JUST LIKE THIS AMAZING BOOK IF I CATCH YOU STEALING ILL SAW YOUR NOSE RIGHT OFF HANDS IN YOUR POCKETS, FINGERS IN THE SOCKETS BARGAINS TO BE HAD!

COOKIES, COOKIES BY THE SCORE

THEY ARE REALLY LUSH, THE OPPOSITE TO MUSH FOR JUST ONE POUND TWENTY THREE DELICIOUS TREATS FOR YOU AND ME!

BARGAINS TO BE HAD, BARGAINS TO BE HAD STEP RIGHT UP AND TAKE A LOOK JUST LIKE THIS AMAZING BOOK IF I CATCH YOU STEALING, ILL SAW YOUR NOSE RIGHT OFF HANDS IN YOUR POCKETS, FINGERS IN THE SOCKETS BARGAINS TO BE HAD HANDS IN YOUR POCKETS, FINGERS IN THE SOCKETS BARGAINS TO BE HAD!

Blackout.

Scene Four (Fairyland) Scene Five (Inside Fitzwarrens Fantasy Store) Scene Six (King Rats Dungeon) Scene Seven (On the Docks of London)

Act 2 Scene One (Aboard the Ship) MUSICQ: 9 TO 5

TUMBLE OUTTA BED AND I STUMBLE TO THE KITCHEN POUR MYSELF A CUP OF AMBITION AND YAWN AND STRETCH AND TRY TO COME TO LIFE JUMP IN THE SHOWER AND THE BLOOD STARTS PUMPIN' OUT ON THE STREET THE TRAFFIC STARTS JUMPIN' THE FOLKS LIKE ME ON THE JOB FROM 9 TO 5 WORKIN' 9 TO 5, WHAT A WAY TO MAKE A LIVIN' BARELY GETTIN' BY IT'S ALL TAKIN' AND NO GIVIN' THEY JUST USE YOUR MIND AND THEY NEVER GIVE YOU CREDIT

IT'S ENOUGH TO DRIVE YOU CRAZY IF YOU LET IT 9 TO 5, FOR SERVICE AND DEVOTION YOU WOULD THINK THAT I WOULD DESERVE A FAT PROMOTION WANT TO MOVE AHEAD BUT THE BOSS WON'T SEEM TO LET ME I SWEAR SOMETIMES THAT MAN IS OUT TO GET ME THEY LET YOU DREAM JUST TO WATCH 'EM SHATTER YOU'RE JUST A STEP ON THE BOSS-MAN'S LADDER BUT YOU GOT DREAMS HE'LL NEVER TAKE AWAY YOU'RE IN THE SAME BOAT WITH A LOTTA YOUR FRIENDS WAITIN' FOR THE DAY YOUR SHIP'LL COME IN 'N' THE TIDE'S GONNA TURN AND IT'S ALL GONNA ROLL YOUR WAY WORKIN' 9 TO 5 WHAT A WAY TO MAKE A LIVIN' BARELY GETTIN' BY IT'S ALL TAKIN' AND NO GIVIN' THEY JUST USE YOUR MIND AND YOU NEVER GET THE CREDIT IT'S ENOUGH TO DRIVE YOU CRAZY IF YOU LET IT 9 TO 5, YEAH THEY GOT YOU WHERE THEY WANT YOU THERE'S A BETTER LIFE AND YOU THINK ABOUT IT, DON'T YOU IT'S A RICH MAN'S GAME NO MATTER WHAT THEY CALL IT AND YOU SPEND YOUR LIFE PUTTIN' MONEY IN HIS WALLET 9 TO 5, WHOA WHAT A WAY TO MAKE A LIVIN' BARELY GETTIN' BY IT'S ALL TAKIN' AND NO GIVIN' THEY JUST USE YOUR MIND AND THEY NEVER GIVE YOU CREDIT IT'S ENOUGH TO DRIVE YOU CRAZY IF YOU LET IT

9 TO 5! Scene Two (In the Depths of the Ocean)

We are transported into an underwater, magical world full of mystical sea-creatures such as mermaids and crabs, very reminiscent of The Little Mermaid. MUSICQ22: UNDER THE SEA ALL: THE SEAWEED IS ALWAYS GREENER

IN SOMEBODY ELSE'S LAKE YOU DREAM ABOUT GOING UP THERE BUT THAT IS A BIG MISTAKE JUST LOOK AT THE WORLD AROUND YOU RIGHT HERE ON THE OCEAN FLOOR SUCH WONDERFUL THINGS SOROUND YOU WHAT MORE IS YOU LOOKIN' FOR? UNDER THE SEA UNDER THE SEA DARLING ITS BETTER DOWN WHERE IT'S WETTER TAKE IT FROM ME UP ON THE SHORE THEY WORK ALL DAY OUT IN THE SUN THEY SLAVE AWAY WHILE WE DEVOTIN' FULL TIME TO FLOATIN' UNDER THE SEA DOWN HERE ALL THE FISH IS HAPPY AS OFF THROUGH THE WAVES THEY ROLL THE FISH ON THE LAND AIN'T HAPPY THEY SAD CAUSE THEY IN THERE BOWL BUT THE FISH IN BOWL IS LUCKY THEY IN FOR A WORSER FATE ONE DAY WHEN THE BOSS GET HUNGRY GUESS WHO'S GON' BE ON THE PLATE UNDER THE SEA UNDER THE SEA NO BODY BEAT US FRY US AND EAT US IN FRICASSEE WE WHAT THE LAND FOLKS LOVES TO COOK UNDER THE SEA WE OFF THE HOOK WE GOT NO TROUBLES LIFE IS THE BUBLES UNDER THE SEA UNDER THE SEA SINCE LIFE IS SWEET HERE WE GOT THE BEAT HERE NATURALLY EVEN THE STURGEON AN' THE RAY

THEY GET THE URGE 'N' START TO PLAY WE GOT THE SPIRIT YOU GOT TO HERE IT UNDER THE SEA THE NEWT PLAY THE FLUTE THE CARP PLAY THE HARP THE PLAICE PLAY THE BASS AND THEY SOUNDIN' SHARP THE BASS PLAY THE BRASS THE CHUB PLAY THE TUB THE FLUKE PLAY THE DUKE OF SOUL THE RAY HE CAN PLAY THE LINGS ON THE STRINGS THE TROUT ROCKIN' OUT THE BLACKFISH SHE SINGS THE SMLT AND THE SPRAT THEY KNOW WHERE IT'S AT AN' OH THAT BLOWFISH BLOW UNDER THE SEA UNDER THE SEA WHEN THE SARDINE BEGIN THE BEGUINE IT'S MUSIC TO ME WHAT DO THEY GOT? A LOT OF SAND WE GOT A HOT CRUSTACEAN BAND EACH LITTLE CLAM HERE KNOW HOW TO JAM HERE UNDER THE SEA

EACH LITTLE SLUG HERE

CUTTIN' A RUG HERE

UNDER THE SEA

EACH LITTLE SNAIL HERE

KNOW HOW TO WAIL HERE

THAT'S WHY IT'S HOTTER

UNDER THE WATER

YA WE THE LUCK HERE

DOWN IN THE MUCK HERE

UNDER THE SEA

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Dick Whittington