Dear Mr. Beale, I am glad you have brought this to my attention. I do not blame you; I do not eat...
9
Dear Mr. Beale, I am glad you have brought this to my attention. I do not blame you; I do not eat the food on my airlines either. Here is my recommendation, do as I do and bring something else to eat (I like subway). Since you are curious about dinner around my house, I would like to invite you over (I have a five star chef). If you follow my advice, your next flight should be a good one. Remember to always fly Virgin. Take Care, Richard
Dear Mr. Beale, I am glad you have brought this to my attention. I do not blame you; I do not eat the food on my airlines either. Here is my recommendation,
Dear Mr. Beale, I am glad you have brought this to my
attention. I do not blame you; I do not eat the food on my airlines
either. Here is my recommendation, do as I do and bring something
else to eat (I like subway). Since you are curious about dinner
around my house, I would like to invite you over (I have a five
star chef). If you follow my advice, your next flight should be a
good one. Remember to always fly Virgin. Take Care, Richard
Slide 3
Dear Oliver, I pity you in more ways than one. I pity your lack
of thankfulness for never enduring true hunger, and lack of
gratitude for a safe, timely flight. Having to look at the seat in
front of you during a flight is a cruelty in itself, and for that I
pity you even further. The hardships you experienced on that flight
resemble those of a POW camp, and Virgin Airlines will happily
cover the cost of any psychiatric care you deem necessary. For
future flights my recommendation would be flying Wolf Gang Puck
Airlines, but dont forget your camera; their food may be more
photogenic than ours.. My condolences go out to you Oliver, I hope
you can overcome this traumatic flight. Sincerely, Richard
Slide 4
We are sorry about your recent experience and so we are
offering you a free flight* aboard our airline. We hope you enjoy
your flight! *Flights are limited to one person, must be redeemed
within five days of this letter, may not be transferred to a third
party, traveler must fly in cargo hold of plane, no meal will be
served, Virgin is in no way responsible for loss of life or limb
due to frost bite or asphyxiation.
Slide 5
Slide 6
To whom it may concern, Thank you for your complaint. I am
currently struggling to find a solution to your problem. Solving
world hunger will have to wait Sincerely, Richard Branson P.S. Your
right, that was not custard
Slide 7
Repetitive Ignorance its in custard Richard, custard Its
mustard Richard. MUSTARD. Look at this Richard. Just look at it:
Which one is the starter, which one is the desert? Ray Liotta says
Lifes Not FAIR! Its your hamster Richard. Its your hamster in the
box and its not breathing.
Slide 8
Slide 9
Dear Mr. Beale, We are sorry to hear that from you, we
apologize for having you going trough that bad experience. All our
customers are extremely valuable to us. However, don t forget that
this is an airline not a buffet or prestigious restaurant. All I
can say is... please call Angelina Jolie ASAP! Sincerely,
Slide 10
Dear Mr. Beale I am Richard Branson, and I am super bad ass.
While you have nothing better to do than take pictures of food you
dont eat I am busy selling records, building personal islands, and
flying to the moon. Go Beavs, and Seacrest out. Yours Sincerely
Richard Branson