Embed Size (px)
DESCRIPTION
Need a laugh read some of the poems, feel free to sing along if you like
Citation preview
SYMPATHY FOR THE PRINTER
Please allow me to introduce myselfI’m a printer of quality and taste
Provided many jobs, never late!
And I was around since the LetterpressHad its moments of Glory and Fame
Made damn sure to buy a DigitalWashed our hands, no more plates
Would be pleased to meet you
Was hanging around “your neighborhood”When I saw it was time for a change
So, I cold called the Marketing Group
I ran a pressHeld a Production Rank
When the Projects engagedThere will be no mistakes
Would be pleased to meet you
Ah, What’s puzzling youAre we good or simply insane?
Whoo, whoo ...Whoo, whoo ...
We’ve been around for many long years
Can you guess my first name?
“Edward”
“Sanders”
Now You Know My Name Edward [email protected]
That’s how I got your name
Can you guess my last name?
BEST OF TIMES
And we’ll take on any project that must deliver on time
When printers lock their doors and hide inside
We’ll take the challenge so get some restAnd every day you’ll find.
But I know, when your world turns upside down
Keeping your dreams alive and you in Paradise.
Tonight’s the night we’ll make history, both, you and I
I know you feel these are challenging tasksWhile staying with production all night
I do believe it’s true,
These are the best of times
The best of times are winning working from you
Our materials of yesterday will last a lifetime
These are the best of timesThese are the best of times
These are the best of timesThese are the best of times
The headlines read your project delivered on time We believe it’s true
So don’t ever feel helpless like a ship against the tideWe will deliver your project and keep you in Paradise
Baby, I know we will always be around. 4U
Edward Sanders [email protected]
Rumor has it there is another closure in sightBut I know, this closing will pass us by
These are the best of times
So your don’t have to cry, no-no!
Some win Some lose -we’ll make this a world keeping you informed too!
E-COMMERCE
Life is but a moment in spaceWe spend a great part of it in the workplace!
Wouldn’t it be nice to relax for a while?To laugh and maybe share a smile?
How could this be done? One would ask.Let Ed Sanders handle this task!
Allow me an introduction, and I’ll promise you this:A demonstration of technology that really exists!
Easy to useFriendly for all,
A quicker method of procurementWhile eliminating paperwork and time for all!
Order your stationery, forms,brochures and more!
Just point and click in “Your” on-line store!
Now that I’m done, hope you had fun!
WRITTEN BY ED SANDERS
Here is my number when you’re not on the run.
917-589-8900
IMAGINE
Imagine there are no BudgetsIt’s easy if you try
No Limits below usAbove us to only Sky
Imagine all the print buyers
Imagine there’s no competitionIt isn’t hard to do
Nothing to bid or quote for
Imagine all the artistsGiving us what we need . . . .
You may say I’m a dreamerYes, I’m the only one
Hope someday you’ll try usAnd the jobs won’t be just
Imagine no deadlinesI wonder if you can
No need for rushes or responsesAll proofs never to be sent
Imagine all the printers
You may say I am a dreamerAnd in this case the only one
I hope someday you’ll meet meAnd the world of Print
Using only me . . .
And no discounts too!
One
Out of business except for me . . . .
Will always be lots of fun
KEEP ON IMPRESSING YOU
Though I know about the other suppliers
Let’s work once again togetherAnd I meant every word I said
When I said that we won’t disappoint you I meant
And we meant every word we saidWhen I said that we won’t disappoint you I meant
It’s the only thing we want to doWe will never stop
We will just keep on impressing you
Now you’re deadBut it went to another vendor for some, reason
You should’ve known from the other proposals, maybeThere was something missing
You should have seen by the look of their quote
The timeline will not be metNow your frozen
All coiled up and hissing so you call Ed
It’s just not that important
And we’re going to keep on impressing you’Cause it’s the only thing we want to do
We don’t want to waitWe just gonna keep on impressing you
We meant we won’t disappoint you forever
We want to keep on working with you
’Cause it was us baby way before them
That we will perform forever
PURCHASING STRANGER
Haven’t we met?You’re some kind of purchasing stranger
You could be good for meI’ve had experience so there’s no danger
If I’m smart then we’ll quote awayKeep our margins low so we can stay
Heaven forbidI’ll take my chance with this Purchasing Stranger
I looked into your eyesAnd extended you my hand
You’re an Angel in disguise
To know you is to want to help youYour firm’s everywhere I go
And everybody knows
Your can source from anyone
Purchasing StrangerYour no longer a Purchasing Stranger
I looked directly at your face
WRITTEN BY ED SANDERS
That’s why we’re working for you
We provideone stop shopping with cheer Then we can go and grab a beer
Your internal client giving you an embraceSales Stranger in the begining
Now we are all winning !We can finally work for you
This all started with a Purchasing Stranger
