COCKROACHLAND

GETTING STARTED: GEOGRAPHY, HISTORY, PEOPLE AND LANGUAGE

Cockroachland is a small country located in some place around New York’s franchises of KFC. This country has got more than 1000 years of history, but it wasn’t a modern democracy till the nineteenth century. After the historical revolution against insecticide, cockroach people formed a constituent assembly to create a federal state based on the political theory of power division by Montesquieu.

In Cockroachland, there are 1000000 cockroach people and 5000000 larvae. Adult cockroaches are extremely affectionate because they have 4 arms to hold other hands. They are also very sociable and like public festivities, that are usually celebrated at night, on the pavement, with the company of rats and rubbish.

The official language of Cockroachland is Spanish. And the most common dialect is the Chiquito-de-la-calzada Spanish.

By Ricardo Teruel

WHERE TO STAY IN COCKROACH

The majority of the population in Cockroach live as the aborigines, in houses made of products of the land and they sleep in hammocks due to the fact that there are many insects in the land. Nevertheless, there are developed and tourist areas where you can get a place to sleep. Everything depends on what you want to pay for it.

This tourist guide recommends you these hotels if you want to spend your holidays in a luxurious hotel or camping: Cockroach hotel; Red aunt houses; No- insect hotel; Cockroach camping; Red aunt camping, etc. You can find their phone numbers on the net.

One of the best hotels is Cockroach hotel, located in the heart of Cockroach capital, best-known for its upscale residences, fashionable shops and fine, over-priced restaurants.Amenities include:-Rooms equipped for disabled guest are available upon request.-Individual climate control.

-Marble bathroom with bathtub.-Mini Bar.

Another option is Red Aunt houses, an exciting alternative to the traditional hotel.Nothing less than a natural paradise where one connects completely with nature because the houses are on top of the trees.Every house offers a privileged space for retreat and relaxation after a hard day sightseeing, with:-Comfortable spaces for sitting, dinning.-A mesh to stop insects.-An explorer kit

In contrast, if you want to spend your holidays like an aborigine, you can rent a typical cottage, or a houseboat. The best way to rent a cottage or houseboat is to contact with Cockroach´s official web.

By Eva Egea

FOOD IN COCKROACH LAND

Cockroach land has different dishes, you can eat well throughout the country, for example, the most important dishes are:

In the north of the country, the traditional food is papatua, a rich stew made of meat of camel, rabbit, potatoes, garlic, spices and carrots. This stew is flavoured with a lot of spices (in this country we can find a great variety of spices). And finally this stew is served with either pumpkin bread or noodles. It tastes delicious!!!

In the south of the country, travellers can discover a great vatiety of fish dishes, but the most important one is calamake, it is made with a typical fish of Cockroach land called amake, and the other ingredients are: rice, potatoes, peas and seafood. The fish is braised with the potatoes and the rice is boiled with the peas and seafood.

In this picture you can see the Papatua

Species of Cockroach Land (saffron, cinnamon, vanilla, pepper,...)The tourist can savour this

delicious dish in the middle of nature.In this picture, you can see the best cook I have ever seen; her name is Clementina, she is making papatua.

You can eat the Calamake at a traditional restaurant situated in a wonderful place with fantastic views near the city, in this place, you can breathe fresh air.

To sum up, in Cockroach land, travellers can eat very well because they can find a great variety of food: fish, meat, vegetables, sweets and, most importantly, prices are very cheap.

Traditional restauran where you can eat calamake,

Traveller´s tip Do not to forget to taste the typical drink,

Cockrich, made of cockroaches. It is not advisable to wear high-heeled

shoes at restaurants.

By Eva Candela