ClearScien+ficWri+ng:ToolsfortheWri+ngProcess

HollyPrevostAssociateDirector,UHWri+ngCenter

April5,2017hbprevost@uh.edu

www.uh.edu/wri+ngcenter

PART2

Wri+ngisaProcess

Edi$ng&Proofreadingareimportantpartsoftheprocess

GamePlan:TwoLectures

LastTime:Higherorderwri+ngconcerns

Today:Lowerorderwri+ngconcerns

•  Audience/Purpose•  Thesis•  Paragraph

Development•  Organiza+on

•  Transi$ons•  Clarity/Conciseness•  Punctua+on•  Wordchoice•  Spelling

Transi+onsSignalConnec+onsbetweenparagraphs,sentences,andwords

•  Explicit–  Tellyou“gothisway”throughspecificwordsand

phrases

•Implicit–  Direc+onisinferredthroughlessdirectwaysof

signalingrela+onships

TOOL#1:Transi+onsExplicit

(modifiedfromDianaHacker,AWriter’sReference)Toshowaddi$on:again,and,also,besides,equallyimportant,first(second,etc.),further,furthermore,inaddi+on,inthefirstplace,moreover,next,tooTogiveexamples:forexample,forinstance,infact,specifically,thatis,toillustrate,even,namely,specifically,Tocompare:also,inthesamemanner,likewise,similarlyTocontrast:although,andyet,atthesame+me,but,despite,eventhough,however,incontrast,inspiteof,nevertheless,onthecontrary,ontheotherhand,s+ll,though,yetToconcede:granted,naturally,ofcourseTogeneralize:asarule,asusual,forthemostpart,generally,generallyspeaking,ordinarily,usuallyToemphasize:certainly,indeed,infact,ofcourseTosummarizeorconclude:allinall,inconclusion,inotherwords,inshort,insummary,onthewhole,thatis,therefore,tosumupToshow$me:a]er,a]erward,as,aslongas,assoonas,atlast,before,during,earlier,finally,formerly,immediately,later,meanwhile,next,since,shortly,subsequently,then,therea]er,un+l,when,while,onceToshowplaceordirec$on:above,below,beyond,close,elsewhere,fartheron,here,nearby,opposite,tothele](north,etc.)Toindicatelogicalrela$onship(causeandeffect,etc.):accordingly,asaresult,because,consequently,forthisreason,hence,if,otherwise,since,so,then,therefore,thus

h^p://www.longleaf.net/ggrow/transi+onchart.html

TOOL#1:Transi+onsImplicit

INFERREDRELATIONSHIPSCREATEDBY:•Usingtopicsentences•Repea+ngkeywordsandphrases•Crea+ngparallelstructure

–Usesamegramma+calstructure–Usesamepartsofspeech(noun,verb,conjunc+on,etc.)

•BeingconsistentinPOV,tense,andnumber•Movingfromoldtonewinforma+on

Exercise1:Iden+fyingTransi+ons•  Examinetheparagraphbelow.Iden+fytheoccasionswhenthewriter

uses–Parallelstructure–Repe++onofkeywords/phrases–Transi+onalwordsTheancientEgyp+answeremastersofpreservingdeadpeople'sbodiesbymakingmummiesofthem.Inshort,mummifica+onconsistedofremovingtheinternalorgans,applyingnaturalpreserva+vesinsideandout,andthenwrappingthebodyinlayersofbandages.Andtheprocesswasremarkablyeffec+ve.Indeed,mummiesseveralthousandyearsoldhavebeendiscoverednearlyintact.Theirskin,hair,teeth,fingernailsandtoenails,andfacialfeaturesares+llevident.Theirdiseasesinlife,suchassmallpox,arthri+s,andnutri+onaldeficiencies,ares+lldiagnosable.Eventheirfatalafflic+onsares+llapparent:amiddle-agedkingdiedfromablowonthehead;achildkingdiedfrompolio.

Exercise1:Iden+fyingTransi+ons

TheancientEgyp+answeremastersofpreservingdeadpeople'sbodiesbymakingmummiesofthem.Inshort,mummifica-onconsistedofremovingtheinternalorgans,applyingnaturalpreserva+vesinsideandout,andthenwrappingthebodyinlayersofbandages.Andtheprocesswasremarkablyeffec+ve.Indeed,mummiesseveralthousandyearsoldhavebeendiscoverednearlyintact.Theirskin,hair,teeth,fingernailsandtoenails,andfacialfeaturesares+llevident.Theirdiseasesinlife,suchassmallpox,arthri+s,andnutri+onaldeficiencies,ares$lldiagnosable.Eventheirfatalafflic+onsares$llapparent:amiddle-agedkingdiedfromablowonthehead;achildkingdiedfrompolio.

–Parallelstructure–Repe--onofkeywords/phrases–Transi$onalwords

GamePlan:TwoLectures

Last+me:Higherorderwri+ngconcerns

Today:Lowerorderwri+ngconcerns

•  Audience/Purpose•  Thesis•  Paragraph

Development•  Organiza+on

•  Transi+ons•  Clarity/Conciseness•  Punctua+on•  Wordchoice•  Spelling

ClarityTool#2‘TopLe]’SubjectandVerb

•  Loca+on

BeginningofparagraphBeginningofsentence

•  Mostimportantinforma+ongoeshereMakethesubjectthesubjectMaketheverbtheverbCorrectExample:MymotherandIdrovethecartoDallas.IncorrectExample:ThecarwasdriventoDallasbymeandmymother.Disclaimer:Theincorrectexampleisnotincorrectifyouwantedtoemphasizethecarasthesubjectofthesentence.

Exercise#2:SubjectsandVerbsMakethesubjectthesubject•Smartphoneprobesareinthespotlightrecently.Comparingwithtradi+onalmethodswhichareusingfixed-loca+onsensinginfrastructures,forinstances,induc+veloopdetectors,radarsorvideocameras,ithaslowercost,higherscalability

Exercise#2:SubjectsandVerbs

•  Smartphoneprobesareinthespotlightrecently.

Comparingwithtradi+onalmethodswhichareusingfixed-loca+onsensinginfrastructures,forinstances,induc+veloopdetectors,radarsorvideocameras,ithaslowercost,higherscalability.

Exercise#2:SubjectsandVerbs

Makethesubjectthesubject(Rewrite)•Smartphoneprobeshavebeeninthespotlightrecently.Theycostlessandscalebe^erthantradi+onalmethodsthatusefixedloca+onsensinginfrastructuressuchasinduc+veloopdetectors,radars,orvideocameras.

Tool#3Concision•  Eliminatevaguewords,replacewithspecificones

–  Wordy:Thepoli+ciantalkedaboutseveralofthemeritsofa]erschoolprogramsinhisspeech(14words)

–  Concise:Thepoli+ciantouteda]er-schoolprogramsinhisspeech.(11words)•  Changephrasesintosingle-wordsandadjec+ves

–  Wordy:Theemployeewithambi+on...(4words)–  Concise:Theambi+ousemployee...(3words)

•  Changeunnecessarythat,who,andwhichclausesintophrases–  Wordy:Thereport,whichwasreleasedrecently...(6words)–  Concise:Therecentlyreleasedreport...(4words)

•  ChangePassiveVerbsintoAc+veVerbs–  Wordy:AnaccountwasopenedbyMrs.Simms.(7words)–  Concise:Mrs.Simmsopenedanaccount.(5words)

Takenfromh^ps://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/572/01/Takenfromh^ps://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/572/03/

TOOL#3:CONCISION• Editforefficiency•  LearnCPR:

ConcisionPrecisionRevision

Takenfromh^ps://www.e-educa+on.psu.edu/styleforstudents/c1_p2.html

TOOL#3:CONCISIONConcision-beginbycurngtheneedlessandvirtuallymeaninglesswordsExamples:‘inavarietyofways’‘intermsof’Precision-thekeytomakingaparagraph’smeaningmorepreciseistochooseclear,meaningful,representa+venounsplacethemattheheadofeachsentence,andfollowthemwithverbsthatdescribeeachnoun’smeaninginthesentence.Revision-onceyouhavemadethewri+ngmoreconciseandprecise,revisethework

Exercise#3:Concision(CPR)ReadthisparagraphanduseCPRtomakeitmoreconciseIncreasingforeigncompe++onandtechnologicalchange,inavarietyofforms,arenow,astheyalwayshavebeen,disrup+ngvariouswell-establishedpa^ernsintermsofindustrialorganiza+on.Anapparentgrowingqualityintheupwardmovementofeconomicchangeisalsocausinggeographers’interestinregionaladjustmentproblemstogrowaswell:problemsthato]enfocusconcernonregionaleconomicdeclineinacontextoflowratesofna+onalproduc+vityimprovement,onlossofinterna+onalcompe++venessinsectorssuchasautomobilesandprimarymetals.

Exercise#3:Concision(CPR)applied

ParagraphwithCPRappliedRecently,increasingforeigncompe++onandtechnologicalchangehavedisruptedwell-establishedpa^ernsofindustrialorganiza+on.Thisaccelera+onineconomicchangehasheightenedgeographers’interestinregionaladjustmentproblems,drawinga^en+ontoregionaleconomicdeclineinsuchsectorsasautomobilesandprimarymetals.Regionaleconomicdeclineo]enmanifestsitselfthroughlowratesofna+onalproduc+vityimprovementandalossofinterna+onalcompe++veness.

GamePlan:TwoLectures

Last+me:Higherorderwri+ngconcerns

Today:Lowerorderwri+ngconcerns

•  Audience/Purpose•  Thesis•  Paragraph

Development•  Organiza+on

•  Transi+ons•  Clarity/Conciseness•  Punctua+on•  Wordchoice•  Spelling

•Takeabreakbeforereading•Readoutloudslowly•Printitout(orexpandonscreen)•Readitbackwardssentence-by-sentence•Asksomeonetoreadoutloudforyouwhileyoureadsilently•UseGrammarly•Makeawri+ngconsulta+on

TOOL#4:Edi+ng

Tool#5:RecognizePa^ernsofErrors1.AvoidNominalizedVerbs–useofaverb,adjec+ve,oradverbasanounmakesthesentencemorewordyNominalizedsentence:Theexperienceofchildrenwithrespecttobeingatschoolforthefirst-meiscommon.Non-nominalizedsentencewithsubjectandverbatfrontofsentence:Manychildrenexperienceworrieswhentheygotoschoolforthefirst-me.2.Avoidthemisuseofcolons–colonsconnecttwoindependentclauses(whereyoucouldreplacethecolonwiththewordbecause);ortheyconnectanindependentclausewithalistExample:Hegotwhatheworkedfor:hereallyearnedthatpromo-onExample:Youmayberequiredtobringmanythings:sleepingbags,pans,utensils,andwarmclothing.

TOOL#5:UseResourcesThereareseveralgreatgrammarresourcesavailabletostudentswhoarena+veandnon-na+veEnglishspeakers.TheOWLatPurduehaslotsofmini-lessonsandquizzesonceyouhaveiden+fiedyourpa^ernoferror

h^ps://owl.english.purdue.edu/exercises/

Conclusion

•  Incorporatethese5toolsintoyourwri+ngprocess

–Transi+ons:explicitandimplicittransi+ons–Clarity:‘top-le]’subjectsandverbs–Concision:LearnCPR–Edi+ng(punctua+on,spelling,grammar) iden+fypa^ernsoferror,prac+cewith resources

•Learnhowtoself-assessapieceofwri+ng•Examineyourwri+ngprocess

TheUniversityofHoustonWri$ngCenter

ClassroomandBusinessBuilding,Room205www.uh.edu/wri+ngcenter

713-743-3047

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Saturday10-1