Child and Adolescent Counseling: Understanding …...―No matter our age, we are all 6th graders lost looking for our lockers.‖ –Chap Clark Child and Adolescent Counseling 8 Light

Child and Adolescent Counseling 1

Light University Online

Child and Adolescent Counseling: Understanding Children and

Their Issues

CACO 501

Module 5



Module Five

Table of Contents

What Modern Kids Believe Chap Clark, Ph.D. ........................................................................................................................................................... 3

Learning Styles and Learning Disabilities Cynthia Tobias, M.Ed. .............................................................................................................................................. 14

LEARNING TO THINK LIKE KIDS



Description What is adolescence? What is “The World Beneath?” Why can’t I connect with teenagers today? These questions along with many others concerning what modern kids believe will be addressed in this lesson. Students will also learn about the process of individuation, the stages of adolescence, and how it has all changed in the past 100 years. Special emphasis is placed on the period of mid-adolescence and what adult systems have done to our kids today.

Learning Objectives:

1. Gain a general understanding of what modern kids believe and how adult systems have ultimately abandoned them.

2. Clearly define adolescence and identify and explain the three tasks of an

adolescent.

3. Define the term “The World Beneath” and explain its significance in the life of a mid-adolescent.

WHAT MODERN KIDS BELIEVE

VIDEO

Chap Clark, Ph.D.



Introduction

Up until about 40-50 years ago kids were embraced by community. They lived, worked, and

acted out of community and were accepted by everyone in it. Today, people are now

expected to perform in order to be accepted. Such a system has left kids abandoned and

looking for their own identity in a world that expects too much from them. As a result they

have built their own underground world in an effort to survive and the result is a more

disconnected generation longing for connection from the adults they no longer trust. This

lesson is a powerful look into the world of the adolescent and reveals a powerful plan

people must follow in order to bring our kids back to the God who loves them.

I. Culture

A. Culture has changed for kids today.

B. People assume life is static, feeling safest with those who are just like them.

―It is really hard to be a kid today.‖ –Chap Clark

―Our expectation today as adults is that the youth culture is the same as it was when we were that age…This is simply not true.‖



II. What is Adolescence? A. Definition of Adolescence

B. The Period of Life Between Childhood and Adulthood

III. Development of Adolescence throughout History

A. Two Stages of Life—Childhood and Adulthood

B. Meta-narrative

C. From a Tool to a Nuisance

Assimilation and communitywide commitments Lack of commitment in caring for the young

IV. Individuation: The Process of Becoming a Unique Individual

A. The Process of Becoming a Unique Individual

B. A Process of Moving from Dependence to Independence



V. THREE Tasks of Adolescence A. Who Am I?

Identity begins in creation and comes to fruition in redemption

The quest for identity and becoming the person Christ created each child to be

starts with getting rid of false messages

B. Autonomy, so I matter?

Locus of control

1. External – Child

2. Internal – Adult

Do individual choices matter?

C. Belonging

“Where do I fit? Where is my home? Where is my community?”

Interdependently relying on one another

Mark 10:13-16



Present day American narrative: “I have the right to do whatever I want to do.”

Today people must perform to be accepted by others

VI. Puberty

A. Men

B. Women C. The average age a girl hits puberty is the same age both boys and girls in that

society begin asking those three questions.

D. Average age of puberty onset is declining around the world. E. Adolescence in 1970’s was Two Stages:

Early adolescence – 13-15 years old

Late adolescence – 16-18 years old

―No matter our age, we are all 6th graders lost looking for our lockers.‖ –Chap Clark



F. Concrete Thinking Characterized by Early Adolescence

G. Abstract Thinking Characterized by Late Adolescence and Adulthood

VII. Mid-Adolescence: Ego-centric Abstraction

A. Started in Mid-1990’s

B. New Stages of Adolescence

Early adolescence – 11-15 years old – “It’s all about me…I like you, you like me, we are okay.”

Mid-adolescence – 15-21 years old –“I am aware of other people, my impact on

them, and their impact on me but during this season of life I don’t have the energy to care very much.”

Late adolescence –21 – mid/late twenties – “I can conquer the world; I am ready

to insert myself into it but I am not ready to take responsibility for it.”

Kids today admit that the cruelest thing an adult could say to them is, ―High school is the best time of your life; live it up.‖ In light of their own current experience they wonder, ―If this is as good as it gets, I want nothing to do with this thing called life.‖



VIII. Systems

A. Sports

Baseball – Little League born in 1938 to develop and nurture kids

The systems are no longer about developing kids

B. Education Assimilation

Present day—test scores and achievement

C. Church More interested in getting kids to like it than to fit into a community

Kids know they are just a number

D. Family

From solid institution to high disintegration

Parents focus on child’s doing and performing rather than being

E. Abandonment by Adult Systems



IX. The “World Beneath”

A. A System Built by Mid-Adolescents who Feel Abandoned

B. Early Adolescents Still Trust Adults and Think They Care

C. Characterized by Its Own Values, Support System, Belief System, and Hierarchy

D. Oppressed and Disregarded People Groups

E. Living in “Layers” Lack identity Create identity – “coming up for air” “The only people who know me are my friends” Clusters

1. Not true friendships

2. Relationship of necessity

3. Consequences of systematic abandonment

i. Lying to parents

ii. Sex (i.e. oral sex parties)



F. The Most Stressed Generation Cutting Exhaustion Alone and abandoned

X. What Adults Must Do Next

A. Come Alongside Kids Without a Self-Serving Agenda

B. “Every kid needs FIVE adults to become a healthy individuated adult” Adults who will

Know the kids’ name

Look the child in the eye

Sit in the child’s corner, unconditionally inviting that child into their community

―Will you care for one kid that will allow you to sow his steps and hear your story?‖



Bibliography

Barna, G. (2003). Transforming Children into Spiritual Champions. Ventura, CA: Regal Books.

Clark, C. (2005). Hurt: Inside the World of Today's Teenagers. Grand Rapids, MI: Baker

Books. Elkind, D. (2001). The Hurried Child: Growing Up Too Fast Too Soon.

Cambridge, MA: Perseus Publishing. Luce, R. (2005). Battle Cry for a Generation: The Fight to Save America’s Youth. Colorado

Springs, CO: NexGen.



Study Questions

1. What is the biggest myth adults believe about youth today? What is adolescence? How has meta-narrative played a role in adolescence throughout history?

2. According to Chap Clark, what are some of the biggest differences in the way adult systems approached adolescents in the past and the way they approach them today? What effect has this had on youth today?

3. What is individuation? What are the THREE tasks of adolescence? Describe each one. What are the questions adolescents ask in each task?

4. Why is puberty an issue in this discussion? How has it changed the stages of adolescence? What are the present day stages of adolescence? How would someone define the way adolescents think and relate in each stage?

5. What is egocentric abstraction? What is the “world beneath?” What are different aspects of the “world beneath” and how did it develop? What did Chap Clark say every adolescent needs?

Soul Care Notes

Deuteronomy 4: 9, 10 James 1:27 Daniel 1:8 1 Timothy 4:7 Luke 2:41, 42



Description “Kids today do not hate to learn. They hate school.” This course is an eye-opening lesson on learning styles and learning disabilities. With discussions on ADHD, the strengths and weaknesses of students, standardized tests, uncomfortable classrooms, and even the time school starts, students will learn the three main reasons kids tend to hate school and what parents, teachers, youth pastors, etc. can do about it.

Learning Objectives:

1. Gain a general understanding of how the educational system is designed to cater to one type of learning style.

2. Clearly define the three main reasons kids tend to hate school.

3. Be able to implement strategies which address the issues of learning

styles to help the kids you parent, teach, or lead.

LEARNING STYLES & LEARNING DISABILITIES

VIDEO

Cynthia Tobias, M.Ed.



Introduction

Good social interaction, high energy level, independent thinking skills—all attributes many

employers today are looking for in good employees. Yet they are the same attributes

getting kids in trouble at school on a daily basis. Unfortunately, an increasing number of

kids are having a hard time dealing with traditional teaching styles and when they don’t

live up to the expectations of the educational system, they are labeled and taught to

conform to the way the system works. In an eye-opening lesson of learning styles and

learning disabilities students will be introduced to the three main reasons kids tend to hate

school.

I. Three Main Reasons Kids Tend to Hate School

A. It serves the wrong customer.

Educational system is not serving the student today

1. Physical discomfort

2. Early morning/Time of school

School is designed for the convenience of those who are teaching it Kids don’t hate learning…they hate school

―The things people are being hired for today are what they got in trouble for in school—good social interaction, high energy level, and independent thinking skills.‖ --Cynthia Tobias



B. Teachers only focus on the student’s weaknesses.

Two different ways people are pre-wired

1. Analytic 2. Global, intuitive

Highly global kids struggle because educational system is set up for analytic kids Help kids truly focus on how their minds work and show them what they are

good at and what they are not good at teaching them to use their strengths to overcome their weaknesses

ADHD Auditory learners Is the child deficient or is the way teachers are presenting the material deficient? Focusing on child’s strengths and not what people want as teachers makes all

the difference in the world

C. People have confused accountability with tests.

Standardized tests What should child be able to prove by taking this test? What do teachers want

these kids to do? Tests favor analytical minds



Physical discomfort Allow kids the chance to learn the way they want. Give them the opportunity to

say what helps them learn.

II. Is Something Wrong with the Child or the System?

A. What if something is wrong with the system and not the child?

B. What if something is wrong with the parent or teacher?

What is a particular child’s list of strengths? Give each child a book on learning styles and have them highlight the words and

phrases that jump out at them Bibliography Tobias, C. U. (2004). I Hate School: How To Help Your Child Love Learning. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan. Tobias, C. U. (1999). Every Child Can Succeed: Making The Most Of Your Child's Learning

Style. Colorado Springs, CO: Focus on the Family Publishing.

―We should be less concerned with how messy and inconvenient it gets and more concerned with who we are targeting and what we’re trying to accomplish.‖ --Cynthia Tobias --Cynthia Tobias



Study Questions

1. What are the three skills that many kids today get in trouble for yet many employers find attractive?

2. What are the three main reasons kids tend to hate school?

3. Describe what it means to be “serving the wrong customer.” How is the educational system doing this today?

4. How does the educational system handle the strengths and weaknesses of students today? What is the problem with the way they handle it? Why do auditory learners tend to get into trouble more than other students? What is the difference between an analytical learner and a global, intuitive learner? Who does the educational system cater to most?

5. What is the problem with ADHD and the educational system? What does it mean to have “confused accountability?” What does Cynthia Tobias suggest to remedy this problem?

Soul Care Notes

Malachi 4:5, 6 Deuteronomy 13:24, 22:6 Mark 10:14-16 Ephesians 6:1-4

Documents

Child and Adolescent Counseling: Understanding …...―No matter our age, we are all 6th graders lost looking for our lockers.‖ –Chap Clark Child and Adolescent Counseling 8 Light