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Student Name: Atif Iqbal Student ID: 13058021001

Assignment No. 1 (Message for Analysis)

Assignment Title: Practice Your Knowledge

(1) Analyze the MessageThe analysis of the message is as follows:

Contains Vague Impressions Rather Than Facts:The sender of the message has used vague impressions and unethical language instead of providing

the facts. The message does not tell the information about if any warning had been given earlier.

Not a Concise Message:The message is not concise at all. There is a lot of repetition of similar kind of lines only with

different words. It is a destructive message having negative tone throughout the message.

Words and Tone of a Verbal Message:The message seems to be a verbal message being delivered standing face to face. There is impression

of a professionally written message. The words and phrases are full of personal feelings (anger) that

should never be the part of an official message. Rough words are used as well.

Dumping and Unclear Purpose:The message does not clarify or highlight what the purpose of the message is. The exact purpose of

the message is lost somewhere between too many unnecessary lines. The reader gets confused about

what is expected from him. It seems to be just a scolding of the employees and not a memo.

Not Persuasive:The message does not tell the readers how they will benefit if they follow the instructions of the

message. Instead, it puts the readers on defensive mode right from the beginning by only stressing

on the negativity. The readers would tend to get de-motivated after reading such comments, words

and phrases instead of feeling motivated to act according to the rules mentioned in the message.

Conclusion: The above analysis provides that is an ineffective message

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(2) Revise the Message

Date: 15-03-2013

From: H.R Department

Subject: Institution of Employee Monitoring System

Dear All,

It has been observed that the majority of the employees have not been putting the currect timings of

their arrival to office, on the Time Cards. As it is not an acceptable act both ethically as well asprofessionally, the management has decided to take measures to discontinue it. As a result, a strict

Employee Monitoring System is going to be instituted in the office building from Monday 23-03-

2013.

As part of the monitoring system, video cameras would be installed at all the entrances to the

building, and the employees would use electronic key cards to enter or leave the office building.

Furthermore, the employees would be allowed maximum three lates from work or coming back

from lunch.

An appropriate action would be taken against the employees failing to act according the new late

policy.

I look forward to have your positive contribution in the successful implementation of the new

system.

Regards,

Atif Iqbal

Head of H.R Department

IPC Group of Companies