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Don’t put up with annoying, unreliable birth control. There are alternatives that might actually boost your mood, metabolism, and sex drive. Five real case histories prove that they’re absolutely worth searching for. By Erin Zammett Ruddy

Change your Birth Control, change your life

iI never thought I’d say this, but I love my birth control—and not just because it keeps me from having more kids. The Pill I used to take worked, sure, but every month I’d have some PMS-induced Hulkish freak-out that made me feel (and seem) crazy. It wasn’t until I’d had my second child—and my 242nd meltdown—that I considered a change. A friend had gotten an IUD and raved about it, so I pumped her for information and cross-checked it with my other friend, Google. My gynecologist loved the idea, so at 34, I dropped the Pill and got ParaGard, a non hormonal IUD. My husband was a tad suspicious of the idea of a copper rod chilling in my uterus, but psyched that my swinging pen-dulum of emotions was gone. We were both happier.

When I mentioned this revelation to my girlfriends one night over cocktails, it sparked a long conversation about our birth control hits and misses, which turned out to be mostly misses. Some of my friends were dealing with mood issues like I used to, some suffered through low libido or heavy pe-riods, and one showed us the black sticky residue still on her butt from the patch she’d stopped using months ago. An-other friend had hilarious stories about the NuvaRing hula-hooping around her husband’s penis, and another had re-sorted to “pulling and praying.” What I took away from this overshare: We all put up with a lot in the name of contraception.

“Women will go years dealing with a birth control they don’t like,” says ob/gyn Hilda Hutcherson, M.D. “I think it’s because they don’t know what else is out there.” And even if something has been working for you, it might not be right as you get old-er and after you have kids. “There isn’t one perfect solution for your whole reproductive life,” says Rebecca Booth, M.D., a Louisville, KY–based ob/gyn and the author of The Venus Week: Discover the Powerful Secret of Your Cycle… at Any Age.

So, what to do? First, gather info on your own—talk to friends, read the stories here, find details online—before you see your doc. “The typical gyn visit is 15 minutes, so no doctor is going to give you a dissertation on all the various methods available,” says Hutcherson. Use that precious time to discuss the options you like in light of your personal health history. And if you do make a switch, be patient. “Unless you’re having something really serious, like extreme bleed-ing or pain, give a new method three months before decid-ing whether it works for you,” Hutcherson says.

Bottom line: As with many things (sex life, hair, mar-riage), you don’t have to settle for so-so birth control. These women didn’t give up their search for a better match, and it paid off. You may wind up with something different—these aren’t the only choices—but you won’t know how much better you can feel until you try.

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Photographed by Stuart Tyson

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Her birth-control breakthrough: Suzy switched to ParaGard after her second child and was happy

that there were no hormones involved. But after she’d weaned her daughter and the baby was sleeping through the night, “I still seemed like I had a newborn, that’s how exhausted—and fat—I felt,” she says. She started to sus-

pect she actually needed the hormones to feel balanced. After two cycles on the Pill again,

she was back to normal. “I lost the weight, I had energy—even my skin looked better,” she says. “It

wasn’t the IUD’s fault, but I am glad I got it out.”

What you need to know: There are women who just plain feel better on the Pill. The added estrogen and progestin suppress ovulation and the hor-monal spikes that can affect moods, skin, energy levels, and appetite. “A lot of patients tell me they want to go natural and try non hormonal birth con-trol, but it isn’t always better,” Booth says. While about 15 percent of women report worse mood swings on the Pill, many feel it gives them a more even keel. Others swear by what the Pill does for their skin. There isn’t one Pill that’s guaranteed to speed metabolism, but with some trial and error, you might find one that does that for you. Taking the Pill also allows you to manipulate your cycle; if you skip the week of placebo pills, you can avoid a period for a vacation or an event (a completely safe thing to do).

Her birth-control breakthrough: “I always forgot to take the Pill,” Amanda says. “Or I forgot to take it at the same time every day.” She and her husband sometimes remembered to use a condom as backup, but she felt worried pretty much all the time. The Pill eased her dysmenorrhea (“crazy pain during my period,” she explains), so she didn’t want to give up the hormones that helped. Mirena delivers hormones, so she got the benefit of pain relief without having to remember to take the Pill. It’s been great for the couple’s sex life, too, because now Amanda doesn’t get a period at all (not uncommon with Mirena). “That’s awesome,” she says.

What you need to know: An IUD gives you long-term protection: great for moms spacing out their kids, and for women who are done having children—but not done having sex (especially if tubal ligation seems too permanent). Mirena is also prescribed to combat heavy periods—and getting rid of those can definitely change your life.

Her birth-control breakthrough: When her first post-pregnancy period back on the Pill came with heavy bleeding, Deb knew something was up. “In 20 years on the Pill I’d never had a problem,” she says. She endured the bleeding for two weeks, knowing that the first period (or few) after having a baby could be different, then said, Enough. Her doctor suggested the NuvaRing. It was just the ticket for Deb’s body—and periods. “I love it!” she says. “Only having to change it once a month versus taking a pill daily is very freeing.”

What you need to know: The ring works like most Pills (three weeks on, one week off), though if you want to skip your period, you just pop in a new one instead of skipping a week—Deb does that to stave off menstrual headaches. The flexible plastic ring is inserted into the vagina (by you, like with an applicator-free tampon), where it dispenses ovulation-suppressing hormones. Some women get a mucousy discharge, which is not problematic and often considered a benefit because of the added lubrication during sex.

She lost the extra weight Bad periods, gone

Less worry, better sex

Suzy P., 39, mom of two (ages 4 and 2)

what she tried: Pill IUD Pill

Deb M., 40, mom of one (age 5)

what she tried: Pill NuvaRing

aManDa c., 33, mom of three (ages 8, 6, and 3)

what she tried: Pill hormonal IUD

Changeyour...

Her birth-control breakthrough: When Marie and her husband were almost—but not quite—ready to have kids, she stopped taking the Pill and bought some spermicidal foam, which is supposed to kill sperm on contact. So much for that: Nine months after trying it, her first son was born. She and her husband were thrilled, but for the next eight years, when they weren’t trying for more kids, her husband wore condoms. “I didn’t mind, but he was less enthused,” says Marie. And they both hated the extra step. When Marie got pregnant with her third child, she was confident that she would be her last, so she arranged to have her tubes tied. “The doctors asked me over and over if I was sure, and I was,” she says. The procedure took about 20 minutes after her C-section, and the recovery was no longer than with her other births. “I never have to worry about getting pregnant again, and I can just enjoy sex, whenever, wherever,” she says.

What you need to know: Totally done having kids? Think you’re too old to get pregnant—but hearing about a 47-year-old new mom freaks you out? Welcome, tubal ligation. A doctor clamps, ties, or cuts the fallopian tubes to prevent an egg from entering. Another permanent option: Essure, a tiny stainless-steel coil that’s inserted into each of your fallopian tubes, creating scar tissue that prevents sperm from passing. And then there’s vasectomy, which is a great, safe, female-parts-not-required option. Because maybe it’s time for your guy to step up.

Redbookmag.com 127

Her birth-control breakthrough: Kate tried two different birth control pills

over the years, but felt pretty much the same on both: She had a regular period, which she liked, and zero interest in sex, which she didn’t. “I loved my husband, but I’d pray that

he’d have to work late so I didn’t have to tell him I wasn’t up for it,” she says.

She also endured dark moods and irrita-bility, which also affected her marriage. “I swear

I think I actually told him I wanted a divorce once because he forgot to pick up wine,” she says. “I became a nagging, bitchy, sex-less wife, and I hated it.” After hearing all this, Kate’s doctor switched her to a low-dose Pill (with lower levels of both estrogen and pro-gestin). “This one worked so well—better moods, a cycle you could still set a watch to, and my libido was finally back!” says Kate. “I can’t believe I waited so long to make a change. I feel like the best possible version of myself and I love it.” So does her husband.

What you need to know: One of the most common complaints about birth control pills is low libido. While some women love that traditional Pills suppress testosterone (for the clear skin), others find that their sex drive goes missing without it. There are several low-dose Pills on the market; just be aware that many must be taken at the exact same time every day in order for them to be effective. “I see many patients suffer because they’ve grown attached to their Pill and they don’t want to go through the hassle of mak-ing a change,” says Booth. “But no one should have to live like that.”

No more thinking about birth control—like, everBad periods, gone

her liBido is BaCk in Business!

Kate R., 34, mom of one (18 months)

what she tried: Pill different Pill

better Pill

MaRie G., 36, mom of three (ages 9, 4, and 1)

what she tried: Pill spermicidal foam

condoms tubal ligation

Birth Control 101

• Pill: The most popular form of contraception comes in three varieties: the combination pill (estrogen and progestin), low-dose combo, and progestin-only (the “mini pill”).

• iuD: Intrauterine devices are small plastic or copper rods inserted in the uterus by a doctor; they prevent sperm from reaching the egg.

• RinG: nuvaring is a flexible plastic ring that delivers both estrogen and progestin through the tissue in the vagina.

• iMPlant: nexplanon is a matchstick-size rod that is placed under the skin of your upper arm and releases progestin. It lasts for three years.

• Shot: Depo-provera is a shot given by a doctor every three months. It contains progestin, and its effects can last six to 10 months after the final shot.

• SteRilization: Tubal ligation surgery pre-vents the fallopian tubes from carrying eggs to the uterus. essure is a device that creates scar tissue so that the egg and sperm can’t meet (no surgery required). For the guys: vasectomy cuts the tubes that carry sperm from the testicles.

Thinking about making a switch? Here’s what’s what:

Changeyour life.

BirthControl...