Cesium Issue 2: The Razor Issue

8/15/2019 Cesium Issue 2: The Razor Issue

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m a g a z i n eA r t M e d i a C u l t u r e P o l i t i c s

CESIUM

(The Razor Issue)


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CESIUMm a g a z i n e

Editor-in-Chief Adam Moore

Assistant Editor Brooke Orcutt

Art Director Andy Sommer

Graphic Design ConsultantMaria Moore

Business Director Elizabeth Schmitz

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Cesium Magazine is published quarterlyWe would like to thank the University of Northern Iowa

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Vol 1. Issue 2. January/March 2006


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(table of contents)MiscellaneaFrom the editor 6Contibutors 7

Correspondance 8Upcoming Events 35

ArtFlowers, Sobriety, Out of Town Checks andQuestions Like So What 9

Fiction by Lewis DeJong. A flower deliverydriver searches for more than an address.

Swimming in the Nervepool 13Ben Timmons explores Ebon Fishers recentexhibit at the UNI Art Gallery.

Roommate Wanted 19Fiction by Jim OLoughlin.

Media Audibles 20

Brian Tambascio reviews three albums fromNeil Diamond, James Blunt and Mice Parade.

Why I Love Project Runway 21Essay by Scott Freeh, on his newly discoveredlove of designing.

Return to the Cult 23Brian Tambascio returns to the cult hit,

Bottle Rocket.

CultureIn Search of Bennifer 24

Essay by Janice Houlihan, looking for the originsand politics of name combination.

Erasing the Razor 27Essay by Paul C. Middleton. What lengths will wego to in order to leave shaving behind?

PoliticsPlain Speaking 29

T. Dalley Waterhaus takes a rare look at the Bushadministrations successes.

Why No News is Good News 32Essay by Paul C. Middleton. How the modernmedia divides us all.


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6/36miscellanea / 6

(from the editor)

I was watching the Super Bowl, along with 90 millionother viewers, when an advertisement for the newGillette Fusion came on. At first I was convinced it wasa joke, or quite possibly a low-grade hoax. I rubbed myeyes, and then checked the alcohol content of the beer inmy hand, but quickly realized it was true. For those of youthat missed this engineering marvel, I should explain.

A five blade razor. Five blades. For years uponyears, the two blade razor reigned supreme after thou-roghly throttling the single blade razor (and barber shopshaves) into submission. And then in 1998, Gillette un-

veiled the three blade razor and shaving purists aroundthe world cried blasphemy. Three blades were sure to

shred our faces and increase the irritation. However, de-spite the temporary uproar and worry, men settled intothis new tool for combating the five o clock shadow, and it

worked beautifully. Later on, four blades debuted withoutmuch fanfare, but now we have five blades, and an almostunlimited ability to remove the uppermost epidural layeron our faces.

And thus, with such potent inspiration on my side, andnew Gillette stock in my portfolio, The Razor Issue was born.

Im hoping that this issue operates like a five-bladed implement criss-crossing your hot lathered face,leaving you a bit torn up at the seams, but overall, quiterefreshed. You might even experience some irritation, but

trust me, thats perfectly normal for such a sharp issue. Icould keep going with the corny razor analogies (weretrimming away the unnecessary fluff and leaving you withnothing but smooth writing?), but youre smart, and Imsure you get the point. Or have stopped listening anyway.

As for the proof in the pudding, were proud togive you an ecclectic variety of writing, from a look at theartwork of Ebon Fisher to an exploration of the Benniferphenomenon to T. Dalley Waterhaus admittance that theBush administration might actually be doing something

right .Its shaped up to be a fine issue, and we plan to

give you more of what youve come to expect from Cesium

and our brand new website, www.cesium-online.com.If youre new to the magazine, give us a read (or three)and keep an open mind. If youve been with us since ourhumble beginnings, thanks for sticking around. Hopefully

well hear from you, no matter what category you fall into.So sit back with your favorite can of Barbasol, and

get ready for some razor-sharp writing (that was the lastone, I promise).

Adam MooEditor-in-Chief


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(Correspondance)Who doesnt love getting mail? Except when its ripping you a new one.

The 1968 election between Humphrey and Nixon was said to be one of thewidest-ever margins in history (Plain Speaking, Sep/Dec 2005). It was

actually a fairly close margin, and Nixons win over McGovern in 1972 wasconsidered a landslide. Also, technically Gerald Ford was never elected;he got the job after his boss quit. A fun fact; he was the only person to be

elected to neither the Vice Presidency nor the Presidency.Perhaps you might look into hiring a fact checking department.

-J. Fisher Davenport, IA

The story, Surviving Lillian, by Chuck Dooley (Sep/Dec 2005) was listedas fiction. But I definitely think this has to be an error, because I oncedated a girl named Lilly who broke all the windows on my Jeep Liberty

with my own golf clubs after I broke up with her. You may want to askChuck if hes ever been to LA.

-Nick Hamilton Los Angeles, CA

Glad to see The Big Lebowski finally represented for being themasterpiece that it is (Return to the Cult, Sep/Dec 2005). Thanks. Maybe

we could get a piece on Raising Arizona? -Paul Seawell Cedar Rapids, IA

You gave the latest album from Sigur Ros a lower rating than an albumfeaturing a masked rapper who collaborates with late-night

cartoons (www.cesium-online.com)? I think weve found the editorial taste level.-Jenny K. Framingham, MA

Hey, what up? Dont know who Im writing to and I dont give a damn!This website is very pleasurable...

I liked the magazine and would like to get in on the next.If you down, come get down! If not, two fingers. Peace.

-Chauncy S. Cedar Falls, IA

Chuck Dooleys piece about the college students chugging milk for lack

of better things to do (Challenging the Gallon, Sep/Dec 2005)sounded absolutely painful. You might want to make sure politicians

dont read that, or else well get an age requirement placed on dairypurchases. Oh, and by the way, the fact that there were no females par-

ticipating just goes to show you which one is the smarter sex.-Tara Nichols New York, NY

Make sure to write us at [email protected] with all yourcomments, gripes or corrections. Letters may (or may not) be edited

for clarity or content. Readers who have correspondance selected willreceive a pat on the back for being ambitious.


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(Flowers, Sobriety, Outof Town Checks, and

Questions Like So What)Fiction by Lewis DeJong

We start our story with a young man, Sal Murte,driving his van toward the bank. It is Friday and dan-gerously close to the banks closing time. He scribblesan amount on the check and his name on the back as

he hustles inside just in time. It is the last check he willsend as his summer and his summer job are now over.Of the money he made, over half went out of town incheck formchecks with empty memos. What a worth-less summer he had, toiling in a van with nothing to showfor it but half of his salary and a fading tan. In order tounderstand how futile a summer it was, we must go backto the beginning of it and see what transpired.

In early May it was arranged that Sal would get a job atthe local flower delivery store. He would be given a uni-form, a decal for his van, and a list of instructions and ex-pectations. It would be an easy job that he enjoyed doing;it was something to pass his time. Plus, there was joy inbringing people joy. I am literally bringing people joy,he would say, even though he was figuratively bringingthem joy and literally bringing them flowers. Nonethe-less, he would enjoy it and made several friends at work,friends that would invite him out for drinks. He would go,of course, although he would not drinkhe refused.

His handsome sobriety, however, would catchthe attention of the bartenders, especially one brunettenamed Ashley. She would flirt with him even though he

would not show interest at first. She persisted still, hopinghe would eventually cave, and he finally didthrowinghis arm around her shoulder. They would go, ironically,to the bar that she worked at, with the same people that

were usually there. The only difference on the weekend was that Sals new girlfriend would not be working, butrather taking Sal into poorly-lit areas of the bar whereshe would sit on his lap and copy what actors would do

when they were supposed to be in love.She would ride with him on deliveries. They

would hold hands and rest them on the cup holders.They would choose radio stations together, singing the


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songs like duets. He would let her steal a flower from thebouquets with two dozen, though not from single dozenspreads. She would smile and smell it thankfully. After work,the van would sway under a tree alongside the road leadingup to her stepfathers impressive house. Then, after a whilelonger, the van would rock back and forth. He would fill hishands with her bodybreasts, ass, anything. She wouldlean into him, and then recoil only to lean in further.

I want you, she would call, scratching his chest.

I hardly know you, is what he wanted to reply buthe could not be in the throes of young lust and sensible atthe same time. So he just closed his eyes and mimickedher cries.

Memorial Day came around and Sal went to gopick up Ashleythey were going to spend the holidaytogether. He could see the streaked cheeks as soon as sheopened the door, and he knew that something was wrong.Is something wrong? he asked as he they trudged down-stairs to talk.

Im pregnant.Is it mine?She slapped him.

It yours, but its ours. I want to have it. I think Ilove you, Sal. Perhaps this is a sign; this is the beginning.My stepfather wants this to work, but he wants you to helpout to prove that you will be involved. I know we can dothislets have this baby.

Resigned, he said that he would help. She would make plansfor him to take her to the hospital,help finance the pregnancy, and bethere for her throughout the process. Then, he could bepart of the family. He knew that she felt it was not over,but he would never talk to her again. Regardless, he wouldsend her some money by the end of the short summer.

And so what?He would take the rest of May off and begin again

on the first of June when he gathered his checkhalf of which was sent out of town.

June would begin with a burst of activity in the flower busi-ness. Sal would work overtime, nearly fifty hours a week.The majority of his day would be spent running to a north-of-town nursing home and backdelivering some roses,sometimes azaleas, and tulips to an old man or woman.The drive there would be slow, but the one back wouldbe slower. While inside, he would hustle through the nurs-ing home to avoid the stale air circulating, the sad facescontorting, and lame workers talking. At least three timesa day he would speed over to Shady Pines, although hethought it was funny when he would call it Piney Shades.Then around Fathers Day, the burst would exacerbate andhe would deliver numerous orders there.

One old man in particular would get many of thedeliveries. Sal would bring all of them and soon got toknow this old man whose room was beginning to fill up

with foliage. The man, Albert, would talk about his lack of a familysomething Sal would relate withand how he

wanted a new onesomething Sal would not comment on.

Then, they would waste time just looking at the flowers andtalking about anything that distracted them from what theyshould be doing.

You remind me of my son, the man said grufflyand paternally. He stirred a drink, just by moving theglass. He offered Sal a cocktail of his own, but Sal refusedto drink.

Well, thanks. I never got to know my real dad. I was put up for adoption right away.

The old man rolled up his sleeve and showed SalMurte his arm. Right at the elbow, but at the insidewherea junkie would have a markthe old man had a birthmarkin the shape of a cursive, uppercase Q, which meant it alsolooked like a poorly drawn 2. You got one of these? hesaid, pointing to the dark symbol.

Sal did the same to his sleeve and pointed to abirthmark at the same place. Yeah, I do, he said in matter

which reflected a number of emotions: incredulity, anxiety,distaste, excitement, care, but none more than tranquility.

I saw it when you first came in; I didnt have to seethat to know you were my kin, though. All those flowers youbrought me, I ordered themjust to see you. I think you

are my grandson, but before we can do anything, the nurs-ing home wants me to take a blood test for the orphanage.They said you have to pay for it cause they dont want nokids coming in here to take our money. Thats just what

they said. I can put you in my will, Igot money, you just gotta prove it tothem. You can have a family. We canbe a family.Sal just smiled and hugged the

old man who was now nearly in tears. Albert explainedhow everything was to work and Sal agreed. Still, whenhe walked out through the revolving doors, passing theincoherent noises from the shadows of men, now smokingclove cigarettes in slacks lined with colostomy bags, heknew better. On the drive home he felt the June air andknew that he would not return to Shady Pines. He woulddrive back to the flower shop and tell the boss that he hadto be given a new route. Regardless, he would send theman some money.

And so what?

July would begin slowly as the first few days leading upto the holiday were long dayslong because time movesmore slowly when the sun is constantly imposing on skin.Cold sodas would boil after only a few drinks or severalsongs; the reentering of the van would become a diffi-cult process because of the vinyl seats that radiated. Sal

would begin to slow down his work and fraternize aroundthe shop more. This would improve his status among theother workers who enjoyed people who would slow downtheir work, and especially those who would slow downtheir work to fraternize; this ballyhoo would not includethe boss.

Sal would do this so much that he began to get in- vited to the parties of his coworkers, including the big 4th of July blowout at Todds lake house. Sal accepted this offer, notbecause he was terribly social, but he was terribly bored.

He knew that she felt it was notover, but he would never talk to

her again.


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The weekend led off with a bonfire and a contestto see who stayed up the latest. Sal did not win, and in fact

woke up early enough in the morning to find Todd insert-ing a syringe between his toes, after which he passed out.Sal carried him to the beach house, although Todd pushedoff again once there. Sal ignored this behavior for the sev-eral days that the party continued, but he could not stoplooking at Todds toes. Todd would come over and offer Sala drink, to which he refused. Both young men would look at

each other confusedwondering why the other would do what they were doing. The parties would continue throughthe long weekend and July, with Sal catching Todd doingmore heroin, but Sal still showing up and hanging out.

July was winding down when Todd finally came tohim for help, asking him: Will you help me?

Sal wanted to help his friend who had dark bagsunder the eyes; his friend who was twitching and mistak-ing orders at the shop. Scarier, though, was where Todd

was going, not where he was.I always thought of you as a good friend, even a

brother. If you helped me out right now, you can move in with me, it could be like family. I just need a little money

for rehab, and then I get some money from my parents.Theyll help as long as Im clean, so I need your help to getthere. If you cant or dont want to, thats fine, Im not askinganybody else. You are the only one I trust.

So, Todd got everything prepared and told Salthat it was going to work out fine. Sal left Todds home andknew that he could not see him again. He had his sched-ule switched again to avoid Todd and the whole crowd. He

would try to get him the money before summer was overthough.

And so what?August began and Sal waited for his last check and

then told his boss that he had to be going back from wherehe camethis was a lie, as Sal was going someplace new.He got his last check and drove quickly to the bank wherehe sent half of it away, which is where we began our story.

As was said earlier, Sal had a bad summer and now it wasover. It was a bad summer because nothing really mattered.Some girl lied to him to try to get him to stay and start afamily. Some old man wanted a friend who will mourn him.Some junkie needed a friend to get by and not kill himself.

And what is worse was that they all wanted some money.Sal did not have any money. He sent half of it out of

town to a husband and wife whose child had died when Salhad gotten drunk and called her for a ride. It was a night

when the roads were icy. Her car crashed and he did noteven know about it until the next day. The parents started afoundation at a local library to which Sal Murte gave moneyout of an ugly combination of guilt and obligation. He stillcould not feel anything, but perhaps those checks were his

way of doing something human and taking responsibilityfor killing that girl.

So we end with Sal leaving the city, going to findsomewhere new where maybe something will matter andhe can forget what has happened. Maybe somewhereits not just synapses firing for no reason, or its not just

electrons bouncing off one another just out of habit, or itsnot just the binary world that we walk through each day.Someplace where people arent like the flowers they lovesogrowing, blooming, then dying in an ephemeral burstof nothing. Someplace where it all means something be-cause people are like flowers because they grow together,roots touching underground.

He would never send the money to Ashley whobirthed his child and would have loved him. He would

never send money to Albert who was his grandpa and would have given him a human connection. He wouldnever send money to Todd who was a good friend to Saland would have gotten clean even without him. Sal Murte

just couldnt bring himself to be a valuable part of thesepeoples lives.

Nonetheless, he imagines Ashley having the baby with the support of the old man his wrinkled hands holdingthe newborn in a room filled with flowers. He imagines Al-bert finding a son in Todd who now brings him his flowersand sits with him, stroking their birthmarks. He imaginesTodd out of rehab, engaged to Ashley, celebrating their

wedding with pictures, cake, and an assortment of flowers.

Or maybe they all start a family and have a garden. All hecould do was hope, because he was on his way out of townlooking for another job so that he could rush to the bankon Fridays and send half of his check out of town.

And so what? cs

Making a r t mat t er.Featuring invent ive f ict ion , inspiring poetry andinsightfu l nonfict ion from todays f ines t wri ters .

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(Swimming in the Nervepool) A look at Ebon Fishers Media Ritualsand Zoacodes

As I get closer to Ebon Fishers world, I cant help butwonder exactly what to expect. The exhibit, titled Trans-

formations in the Nervepool: The Rituals & Zoacodes of Ebon Fisher , leaves me bewildered. Friends and acquaintancesin the art department at the University of Northern Iowahave tried to explain it to me, but they usually ended uptripping over their words for lack of an effortless classi-fication. Technology, science and culture were all usuallymentioned in an interchangeable order, but they were all

just too broad to give me any idea of what to expect.So I decided it would be best to simply check it out

for myself.What I find really does seem to defy a standard art

classification, in the most positive sense imaginable. The

by Ben Timmons


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first thing I see when I step into the quiet, dimly lit galleryis a far wall with massive scientific drawings of the humanorgans responsible for our senses. To my right and left aregiant images of the bladder, liver, stomach and pancreas.This is definitely modern, I say to myself.

***

Artist Ebon Fisher began his experiments with technologyand culture at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology in1984. He was awarded the job of teaching an undergradu-ate class, entitled Creative Seeing, and this would prove tobe the spawning point for his pioneering work.

Fisher began organizing what he termed mediarituals, bringing together a group of Boston musicians,dancers and a DJ to perform biologically-themed ceremo-nies. The group was named Nerve Circle , and would beginFishers experiments in visceral theatre, which combinedblaring music, random media and a highly interactive audi-ence, all designed to open participants minds to new formsof thinking and experience. However, after encounters withthe Boston police (interrupting a Nerve Circle performanceentitled, Evolution of the Grid , in Fishers darkened loft),and an eventual eviction, Fisher relocated to Williamsburg,Brooklyn, where he would hone the concept of these mediarituals, and push his unique art even further.

***

I spend some time examining these large images of humanorgans, and eventually make my way around the left side of the gallery. Most of the art shown depicts biology in a very

abstract manner. The piece, Dear Little Rats Brain , is justas the name sounds: a large representation of what couldonly be the nerve center for a rodent. It is displayed nextto Human Pelvis , and I find myself anchored between thetwo images, wondering where the inspiration came from.

The placard next to both indicates that they wereused in various media rituals, but does not elaborate. Iimagine throbbing music, perhaps techno, but not neces-sarily, and people dancing around these giant depictionsof beautiful biological design, standing in stark contrastto the artificial technology that is used to power the lightsand sound.

But as I look at these images towering over me, Istart to think that the two do not stand in stark contrast,but instead bring together technology and the natural

world into a sort of strange, post-modern organism wherethe delineations between technology and biology do not

from left: Human Pelvis, Dear Little Rats Brain, I See Now

Dear Little Rats Brain


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necessarily exist.

It reminds me of The Matrix . I suspect thats not what he had in mind.In an interview much later, I get a chance to ask

Fisher about these organs. Since I was an undergraduatestudent all my imagery has flirted with science -- notbecause science is absolute or true , but rather its a popularreference point. I see the images of organs and networksas non-objective, living phenomena emerging withincultures relationship with nature, he replies.

***

Once in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, Fisher set about address-

ing and modifying what he called, living traditions. Themedia rituals would continue in differing forms with thehelp of other local artists, and evolved into his monthly

Media Compressions . Media Compressions were set up toshare information in a classic democratic circle, layeringpopular media in a second skin around the group, Fishersays. Participants would bring media in a variety of forms(slides, video, music, etc.) and share with the group, withthe media samples becoming layered on top of each other,building in intensity until climax and total silence.

Fisher soon branched out from Media Compres- sions , hosting notable events such as the Eyeball Scan-

ning Party , where participants would have their eyeballs

scanned, and then look into a video camera installed inthe middle of the party, and share their thoughts on theprocess. There was the simply named Suction/ReflectionSystem , where participants would move through a space tofocal points on the floor (identified with strobe lights anddirectional markers), and set off projections of microscopictissues in the process. Fisher also developed the Web Jam

with fellow artists, a de-centralized hybrid mesh of variouscultural, technological and environmental webs, all in theeffort to create new hybrid life forms, bringing togethereverything from video to fire to exploding watermelons. Inthe course of the Web Jam , all of these webs would interactand create new organisms and subsystems.

Throughout all of these media rituals, the combi-nation and interweaving of human and media technologysought to bring the two towards one collective meetingpoint. In the midst of these rituals, the artistic communityof Williamsburg, Brooklyn formed and flourished.

***

Moving from the left side of the gallery, where most of hisearly biological work is displayed, I move into a dark room

with soft, almost tribal-sounding music emanating from theceiling. The placard at the entrance indicates it is called a

Human Stomach Enlarged Neuron Drawn by Psychologist


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18/36art / 18

as suggestions for ones exploration of the world; they feellike something to come from Eastern philosophy, not theWestern world of thought. There are pictures and imagesof Zoacodes in the most mundane of places and situations;in the car, in a field, or in a persons hand. And the inter-esting thing is that they do not seem like foreign objects,but instead like they belong and blend with these environ-

ments. They change with culture and feedback, allowingthem to take any number of forms and meanings.

Fisher says, Zoacodes are not intended to act asedicts or rules, but rather open-ended, optional socialalgorithms (problem-solving routines) which combine,usurp one another, and play aboutThe truly open mix-ing and evolution takes place in a more turbulent spaceof media, culture, minds and the wider environment whichsustains it all.

He elaborates: I dont expect my Zoacodes tocompete with thousands of years of religious and seculartraditions. For that matter I dont envision any ethics sys-tem supplanting any other, per se, although hybridizationseems inevitable. This has already occurred, as is wellknown, with the merging of Christian and Pagan traditions.Culture seems to work like a big bubbling soup in whichmultiple systems operate simultaneously, overlappingand mixing continuously. In my ruminations on a network-based ethics system, Ive thought about how overlappingand even competing principles might cohabitate withina single ethics system -- and perhaps even melt down atthe edges, embracing evolution, decay and context-drivenchanges in emphasis.

***

Fisher has continued to explore his Zoacodes , and hascreated what he calls the Nervepool , a digital ecosystem

where these bionic ethics can evolve further through feed-back and media rituals. He continues to explore the con-nections between culture and technology, and considers

himself a gardener or zoologist, cultivating his mediaentities and events like organisms.

When asked about what he hopes the ultimategoal of his work will be, Fisher says, I hope I lead viewersto sense the utterly strange and wonderful nature of exis-tence itself. I dont want them to get stuck on my work, perse. The Russian filmmaker, Tarkovsky, once said he usedhis camera to look with wonder at nature. Im hoping todo something along those lines, although I include culture,religion and science with nature. With the Zoacodes , I hopepeople will come away appreciating ethics and social net-

works in general . Life is a miracle. Social experience is amiracle multiplied. Psycho-social-ecological experienceis a universe whirling in a bewildering web jam.

Zoacode With Two Probes Over Snow

cs

Give Ebon Fisher feedback about his Zoacodes andartwork at www.nervepool.net, and make sure to check

out www.cesium-online.com for moreof Ebon Fishers art.


19/36art / 19

(Roommate Needed)fiction by Jim OLoughlin

Roommate Needed!!! A totally reasonable $275 a month!

These are great digs! All appliances are NEW! Washer/Dryer: NEW! Refrigerator: NEW! Venetian blinds: MOSTLY NEW! Oh, yeah, carpet: NEW!

You will want to live with us! We are: Jesse, a music major who also works at Sonic Music and only practices hisdrums between 4:30 and 6:00 p.m.; Jason, a business majorand delivery dude at Pizzarama who brings home leftoverpies at the end of the night; and Wes, a philosophy major

who is currently between jobs but wont bum a smoke off you on ethical principles.

We are great people to have as roommates, and well

make you feel right at home. Totally open and honest andeasy get along with unless youre into stealing your room-mates stuff, like the last guy, Julian, which was a real buzzkill and led to a Survivor -like tribal council scene that wasa lot less enjoyable than it looks like on TV. But we all getalong great. Aside from the last guy, Julian, stealing thingsand the time Wes meds got messed up and he threatenedGeorge, our landlord, we have never had any problems.

And George, our landlord, is totally cool and quite liberaland not a slumlord by any means! If were a little late withthe rent, we dont fret, because George usually forgets tocash the checks until the middle of the next month any-

way. And he was even cool about that time Wes chasedhim down with a baseball bat and understood about Wesmeds being messed up because he said when he cameback from Nam there were a few years hed rather not re-member himself.

So, youll get your own bedroom with a nice view, as longas you like the look of brick. You can also keep the bigfish tank Julian left behind, though after the whole incident

with the python that escaped from the tank wed all bemore into less-dangerous pets like hamsters or maybe aturtle.

But anyway, where else can $275 a month get you a homeand friends? Its like less than $100 per friend, and that

doesnt even include the companionship of Princess, theamazing three-legged cat that survived the attack of thepython. Give us a call at the number below. Well be happyto talk to you anytime, except maybe not between 4:30 and6:00 p.m. when Jesses practicing the drums.

See ya later, peoples!

Read more fiction online at www.cesium-online.com

cs


20/36media / 20

(Audibles)This issue, our resident audiophile, Brian Tambascio, decides to cut away the rest of the band

and focus on three musicians that explore in softer tones.

12 Songs Neil Diamond

On his amazing enough 29th album, 12 Songs is a storytelling, acoustic concoc-tion of slow rock and soulful lyrics, but isnt the same old Cherry, Cherry

weve seen before. With nothing more than his voice and his guitar on mosttracks, Neil regales us with tales of broken love and lifelong struggles. One of the best cuts is a song entitled, Hell Yeah, and builds beautifully up to a pow-erfully understated conclusion. We features more of a polka/ragtime rhythm,giving us classic Neil lyrics like, Love is all about we. He treats us to somebrass and violins on, Evermore, one of the catchiest tunes here. 12 Songs ismore somber overall than much of his earlier work, and that might turn someoff, but for the rest of us, Neil has produced a definite gem that will keep usforever in blue jeans.

Back to Bedlam James Blunt

Starting off in small bars around London, 28-year-old James Blunt is now on thehot list all over the U.K., and his newest album is setting him off right acrossthe pond. Trained in piano and violin, Blunt had also been in the army for fouryears before he realized his true calling was music (and were glad he did).Youre Beautiful is his first single, featuring Blunts high tenor voice and aninfective chorus. The most upbeat track on the album is, Wisemen, with poprock guitar and a faint synthesizer, obviously aiming to be his next single. If youre in the mood for something a little slower, Tears and Rain and No Brav-ery are more vocally focused, with touches of faint piano and acoustic guitar.

A few songs on this album love to build up to nothing, which becomes a bit of atest of listener endurance, but overall, it proves to be a rewarding listen.

Bem-Vinda Vontade Mice Parade

Adam Pierce, the brain behind Mice Parade holds true to his alternative-fusiongenre that (by nature) lacks definition. On his newest solo album he combineseverything from abstract funk, to slower orchestral-acoustic mishmashes, whereit sounds like everything was thrown slow-motion into the kitchen sink. TheDays Before Fiction is one of the most symphonic tracks, featuring a plethora of

everything from exotic percussion, synthesizer and a soaring tenor vocal track.Nights Wave shifts crazily from strumming acoustics and deep drum groovesto a sporadic guitar break, and finally mutates once more into a catchy chorus.Certain tracks such as Warm Hand in Farmland, and The Boat Room, didntseem to develop as much, but Pierce has a knack for composing with delicacy.Some of the randomness in a few tracks wanted to drag on too far, but it might

just be the secret to Mice Parades musical insanity.

The rating scale? Read the beakers.1 beaker: Pass on it 2 beakers: Only if youre a fan 3 beakers: Damn good 4 beakers: Buy Now!Make sure to get more music/talk more music on www.cesium-online.com


21/36


22/36media / 22

is seemingly absent from most reality television. Insteadof learning where someone got their breasts done, or thegym they work out in, we learn about their struggles tomake a name in the fashion world, something inherentlymore interesting to me (although it might be because

writers experience much of the same thing). Other showshave confessional moments, where characters dish to thecamera, and cry about how much they hate one personor another; Project Runway has this, of course, but we also

get to hear Santino talking about the madness behind hislatest design, or Nick contemplating his muse. We see theideas for the designs coming together before any work iseven done. Its a soap opera of creativity.

And then there are the clothes. Watching thesehip, young designers construct and invent hip, young out-fits from nothing makes us feel hip. As we listen to Zulemadescribe just why we need an interlock sewing machine,

we feel knowledgeable about fashion, something that, andI can speak freely for my friends here, we have never feltbefore. As we watch Daniel and Chloe sewing crazily tobeat the midnight deadline, it sets us to talking about howthat skirt just does not work , or what a shitty design Andre

has committed to. When the models begin to strut confi-dently down the runway, we readily discuss our favoritesand guess at what design will give a fated designer theaxe. We flex our creative and aesthetic muscles, and bringour own opinions to bear, a rarity in reality television.

The appeal of the whole process may come fromthe fact that the show focuses around a form of creativitythat everyone has their fingers in. Everyone has a sense of fashion, whether it is good or not. Even my dad, who cantseem to dress himself in coordinating colors, thinks he isincredibly stylish, and becomes slightly offended whenmy mother tells him to take off the Members Only jacket.

Project Runway makes high fashion incrediblyaccessible, and it makes us feel cool for taking part in it.Watching Fear Factor does not make me want to jump outof a moving car, and Survivor does not make me want to

wear fig leaves and stomp around a tropical island. But,really, after watching Project Runway , I say to myself, I betI could do that. Not in a dismissive way, but in an embrac-ing way, because, man, Id really like to try.

Of course, it should be obvious to me that I cantdo that; I wouldnt even come close. I lack the training, thefashion school and the incredibly stylish gay eye. But thefact that my friends and I are intrigued by the sheer cre-ativity that these designers bring to bear means that wecome back, week after week, and hopefully will for sea-sons to come.

Now if I could only get these homemade leopard-print pants to fit right.

Get more pointless media analysis at www.cesium-online.com

cs

thirsty?

The Dublin House325 2nd Avenue

Cedar Rapids, Iowa (319)364-5525

Serviving 16 varieties of Irish andDomestic beer on tap


23/36media / 23

(Return to the Cult)This issue, Brian Tambascio looks at Wes Andersons pioneering indie film, Bottle Rocket , and why

its quite possibly the seventh best film of the 90s

Some Background?

In 1996, fledgling director Wes Anderson co-wrote the quirky movie

Bottle Rocket with his college friend Owen Wilson. The script waspassed from contact to contact until it made it into the hands of JamesL. Brooks, who ponied up five million for production. The movie starsOwen Wilson as Dignin, an inept but hopelessly optimistic robber, andhis gang, featuring Luke Wilson as Anthony, the goodhearted ro-mantic, and Robert Musgrave as Bob Mapplethorpe (named after thecontroversial photographer), the conflicted getaway driver. Screen leg-end James Caan also shows up to play the small role of Mr. Henry, themaster thief/landscaper, and is just another example of the dynamiteperformances throughout. Unfortunately, the nuances seemed to be loston audiences, pulling in one million in ticket sales before making anuntimely exit from theaters.

Whats the big deal?

Throughout the 90s, if not earlier, independent film was the place to findnew talent and loads of creative vision, and many of them moved on tobecome cult films. Wes Anderson is the prime example of this cinematicaesthetic, and in Bottle Rocket , crafts not just the story of a group of bum-bling criminals, but the touching tale of how far dreams and optimismcan take you (refreshing, instead of the crop of slacker epics floodingthe theaters at the time). He pulls it off with his unique style, such aslong shots of oddball objects (like army figurines) and a frequent focuson hands, demonstrating an in-depth knowledge of unconventional sto-rytelling. The dialog flows like the entire movie was improvised, and in

the process, forges an incredibly dry and subtle humor, present in allthe interactions between Dignin and Anthony. Combine this with thefast scene cuts Anderson seems to prefer, and the touching relationshipbetween Anthony and Inez, the English-impaired housekeeper, and youhave an independent film that breaks boundaries.

The cult legacy?

Even though the film wasnt in theaters long, it has slowly spread like a virus through the internet community, cultivating a large collection of dedicated fans. Wes Anderson would go on to direct movies like Rush-

more , The Royal Tenenbaums and The Life Aquatic , all staying true to the

unique vision that he pioneered with Bottle Rocket . The Wilson brothers would go on to be superstars in their own right, showing up frequentlyin Anderson productions and on their own. Legendary director MartinScorsese even picked this movie as his seventh favorite movie of the90s in an interview with Roger Ebert, so you know it has to be good.

How should you watch it?

Watch it with two of your best friends, while wearing matching yellow jumpsuits.

Get more movies online at www.cesium-online.com

cs


24/36culture / 24

(In Search of Bennifer)essay by Janice Houlihan

I will readily admit that I am a tabloid freak; I relishturning the pages of countless gossip mags while I waitin line at the store to buy the essentials, like HagenDaz ice cream and the latest Queen Latifah movie.These magazines, printed on flimsy paper and seem-ingly designed by monkeys throwing opposing colors andheadline texts onto the page, have long held me undertheir spell. Where else can you see the latest celebrity topack on the pounds, or break up in grand style with theirlongtime spouse for the new, hip kid on the block? I striveto keep up on all the twists and turns between the stars,

and in the process it becomes like a mini-soap opera. Oh,the suspense until the next issue!

However, in all my years of studying these shame-less purveyors of celebrity excess, Ive just noticed therecent trend of what I can only call name combination. Itmay sound slightly odd, but anyone that has emerged fromunder a rock and watched television will know what Imreferring to.

Bennifer. Brangelina. Tomkat.Its the apparently recent phenomenon of bringing

two peoples names together to form one unique identi-fier. It all started, of course, with Ben Affleck and the Latin


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bombshell Jennifer Lopez in 2002. Their romance intriguedus, and gave every tabloid freak something to live for (if that seems sad, you just dont understand). For those thatarent as celebrity savvy, the two actors, both already hugestars, met on the set of their hit movie, Gigli , and ignited apaparazzi storm as their romance heated up exponentially.

The general public quickly fell into line, obsessed with getting the latest news about the couple, whether itbe from the latest issue of People , or nightly updates from

Access Hollywood (myself included). Although it isnt de-finitive where the name camefrom or who originated it, thecouple was soon referred tolovingly, simply, as, Bennifer.There was no more mention of Ben Afflecks entire name, nor

Jennifer Lopezs (which had al-ready been unofficially short-ened to the catchy J. Lo); thetwo became the entity knownas Bennifer, and upon their glo-riously public breakup in 2003,

people continued to feverouslydiscuss the demise of Bennifer.

It seemed that imme-diately after, the publics tastefor these name combinationscould not be satiated, spawn-ing most recently, Tomkat, tosymbolize actors Tom Cruiseand Katie Holmes connection,and Brangelina, standing inplace for actors Brad Pitt and

Angelina Jolee. Perhaps act-ing in the spirit of precedentthat Bennifer gave us, all of these couples were the subjectof tabloid scrutiny, attractingphotographers everywherethe couple went, and giving uscelebrity press conferences,most notably Tom Cruisespublic announcement of hisengagement to Katie Holmes (which was rumored to be apromotional stunt for newly released movies by the actors,but I digress).

As I sit, staring at the stacks of People and Star thatsurround my desk and fill my shopping carts, I cant helpbut wonder about the actual act of these name bastardiza-tions, and where they came from. Perhaps it is the sign of an extremely busy society, one that has no time for extrasyllables and wants to trim every word into the most com-pact form available; this makes sense, but the logic fails

when I look around me and realize this phenomenon isnot occurring in personally significant relationships. Myparents (Mark and Katherine) have not become a catchysignifier, like Markine, or Kathark. My friends do notsay things about my boyfriend (George Spanzants) and Ilike, did you hear the latest about Janspanszants? as ut-terly hilarious as that may be.

So where exactly does this pop culture phenome-non hail from? Its not as if this is a long-standing Hollywoodpractice; one of the classic celebrity couples, SpencerTracey and Katherine Hepburn, never altered their namesto become a singular unit (and actually, they spent theirlives avoiding the press), and youve never heard JohnnyCash and his wife June Carter Cash referred to as, Cash-Cash, although it definitely sounds cute. In all actuality,one of the only classic examples available is that of Lucille

Ball and Desi Arnazs production company, formed in theearly 1950s, entitled Desilu,cleverly combining namesinto one of televisions mostprolific production companiesever; this name wasnt used toidentify the couple, althoughthe state of celebrity tabloidmedia was much different (if not non-existent) at that point.

However, it turns out thatthe concept of linguistic com-bination is hardly as new as it

may seem. The practice of fus-ing two or more words, and si-multaneously combining theirmeanings into one, is known asa portmanteau (port-man-too).Linguists and other people thatreligiously study the usage andevolution of language (includ-ing those that insist on correct-ing me when I say who, insteadof whom) have other sub-cat-egories and definitions of thispractice, dependent on howand what words are brought to-gether, but for our intents andpurposes, we will simply lookat the cultural phenomenon of portmanteau.The fact of the matter is thatthe combination of words isall around us, in ways that we

never even pause to think about in our daily conversa-tions. Ever eat brunch? Thats obviously lunch and dinnersquished together, used to describe an awkwardly-timedlate morning meal. What about use a camcorder? That

would be a camera and a recorder, designed to compactlycapture embarrassing moments for reshowing at familyreunions. Ever watched an infomercial, done jazzercise,or stayed in a motel? These portmanteaux (notice theplural spelling) are so ingrained in our society, that notonly does the mention of them here seem rather mundane,but also doesnt even get a raise of the eyebrow from myspellchecker. Even the word muppet is readily recognized,bringing together a marionette and a puppet, and thatsslightly more exotic than the last examples.

If this demonstrates that the idea of combiningtwo words into one has been around for a long, long time,it should be no surprise that weve finally gotten around

Its not easy being a portmanteau


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27/36culture / 27

(Erasing the Razor)an essay by Paul C. MiddletonIf theres one thing I truly hate, and hate being astrong word, it would have to be shaving. I think I fallinto league with most men here. Since late seventh grade,its been a chore to scrape my face smooth just so my girl-friend would stick around. Standing in front of the mirrorevery morning, eyes half open, and dragging a dull razor

across the stubble thats crept in overnight, I wish for ei-ther the ability to grow a full beard, or a genetic makeupthat keeps my facial hair at bay.

Then one day, after applying a whole styptic pencilto my face to stop the bleeding (which stings like dippinga fresh cut into a glass of lemon juice), I said to myself,there has to be a better way.

I quickly took to the internet, searching for a cureto my shaving blues. There were a multitude of websitesdedicated to hair removal in varying forms, from the sim-ple (plucking) to the expensive and involved (electroly-sis). After a few hours of searching, I decided on tryingseveral remedies for my hatred of the razor.

The first stop on my hair removal tour de force wasNair, the famous depilatory lotion. You might rememberthe old Nair commercials, with happy women runningdown the beach in swimsuits and perfectly smoothed legs(who wears short shorts?). The idea was that a quickapplication of this lotion would essentially melt away thehair, leaving you with smoother skin, for a longer time thanshaving. Sounded like the million dollar idea.

After picking up a bottle at the store, I studied thelabel for warnings. There were plenty; the bottle advisedme to apply a small amount to a hidden area and wait for24 hours to check for adverse reactions. I skipped this

step, as time was clearly at a premium. However, beforeapplying the hideous-smelling lotion (ironically labeledas Raspberry Raz-ma-tazz, which sounded delicious), I didsome last minute research online, and found one too manytales of people developing, patches of skin resemblingsevere sunburn, which took weeks to heal.

So I applied it liberally to my armpit as a trial.The directions instructed me to wait approximate-

ly five minutes before wiping off the lotion with a damp washcloth, but no more than 10 minutes (the last part wasin big bold letters). The first minute was bearable, but thenthe tingling quickly changed to a dull burn. Around thethree minute mark, my eyes began to continually dart tothe clock to see if time had elapsed. At four minutes, I sin-cerely thought I heard the pores of my armpits screaming.

When the clock finally stopped at five minutes(sweet relief!), I gingerly wiped the hair away with a damp

washcloth and inspected the area. The hair had been wiped away semi-cleanly, but the area was quite irritated,like I had just used a deodorant laced with acid. The Nair

would go nowhere near my face.The next idea was an intriguing one; it was called

the HairOff Facial Buffer (as seen on TV!). It claimed to, buff away facial hair gently, instantly and easily, with no pain,no chemicals and no mess. Ignoring the implied imageof someone from a janitorial company using a floor bufferon my face, it sounded like a win-win, and even better thanmelting my hair (and skin) away with depilatory lotion.

I opened the box and found a purple plastic holder,and three sandpaper-like pads. The bi-lingual directions(Spanish and German) told me to attach one of the pads to


28/36culture / 28

the purple holder, and then gently stroke my face with it ina counterclockwise direction. Simple enough.

I did as I was told, rubbing the coarse pad over my weeks growth; I could feel the top layer of my skin slowlybeing erased, but the hair stayed put. I pushed harder,but to no avail. After about ten minutes of this (and a lotof wishful thinking), the hair remained intact and my skin

was raw. I assumed it was what fish felt like when they havetheir scales removed. I decided to stop the experiment,

before I rubbed a hole in my cheek.Disappointed and disillusioned, I thought of onelast technique. I had always heard of people getting hair

waxed off, and it was generally touted as the most effec-tive way to get rid of body hair for long periods of time. Itsounded a bit painful (perhaps best portrayed recently inThe 40 Year Old Virgin ), but it seemed to be a quick pain,and easier than losing a pint of blood every morning infront of the mirror.

I called a local salon to inquire about getting itdone professionally.

Sure, we can wax your face, the woman on theother end said cheerfully.

How often would I need to wax it?A mans face? She thought for a moment. Well,

probably like once or twice a week.Really? Once or twice a week?Thats just a guess.Okay. How much would it cost?About 30 dollars a session.Thats when I hung up the phone. As much as I hated

shaving, it was not worth 60 dollars a week to have waxdrizzled on my face, and the hair violently removed, stripby strip. But that didnt mean I couldnt try it at home.

I located the Sally Hansen Hair Remover Wax StripKit (what a mouthful) at the store, right next to the facial buf-fer, which, in hind-sight, was probably not a good sign. Thebox said it was both dermatologist and salon tested, andboasted smooth results for up to eight weeks. It soundedlike the Holy Grail.

With the help of my roommate, we carefully warmed up the waxing strips and placed one on my cheek,over the now patchy beard that was taking shape. We werecareful to place the strip with the grain, and pressed downhard to ensure a good adherence. My heart rate jumped asmy roommate grasped the edge of the strip and preparedto yank it off like an old band-aid. The question was raisedas to whether we should count down, or if she should justpull the strip quickly without telling me.

This isnt helping my nerves, I said. She placedthe end of a toothbrush into my mouth for me to bite downon, as we were apparently out of bullets.

And then she pulled. There was no countdown.If youve ever seen someone wax hair off their

body, and havent tried it yourself, you might think thattheir yelp of pain is simply an overreaction. Please do notbelieve this. My face stung like I had just put it into a tankof active jellyfish. Although I could not deny that the skin

was now smooth and stubble-free, the odds of me usingthe facial buffer were more likely than ripping hair off myface once a week.

In a final thought of desperation, I remembered a website that I had stumbled upon, where men discussedthe use of Rogaine to stimulate hair growth on the face.These men were probably much like me; desperate togrow a great Old Testament beard and have an excuse tonot shave every morning. It was very ZZ Top.

When I looked into it more, however, the side ef-fects began to outweigh the benefits. Men who had ex-perimented with Rogaine, which works by supposedly

stimulating hair follicles, reported waiting up to 90 daysto begin seeing results. Furthermore, Minoxidil (the ac-tive ingredient in Rogaine) apparently enters your systemupon repeated use, instead of simply working at the siteof application. This led some men to report extra growthof hair on their back, chest, legs, and even foreheads. Not

wanting Nair my forehead every few days, I logged off,defeated.

And so, after all of my experiments in eliminatingthe chore of shaving from my life, I trudged back to themirror, resigned to my fate as a man in a clean-shaven cul-ture. My Mach 3 almost seemed to laugh at me for trying toescape his chemically-coated blades (for my comfort) and

his ergonomic handle. My only hope now is that some dayI can engage in progressive gene therapy that will replacethe gene that turns me into a gorilla overnight, with onethat keeps me as smooth as a Neutrogena model.

Get more hygene at www.cesium-online.com

cs


29/36politics / 29

(Plain Speaking)This issue, T. Dalley Waterhaus scares his therapist and pontificates

on the PR successes of an administration.

As the war on terror progresses, now threateningto slurp up Iran in its path to world democracy,

American style, it seems that the public is finally

starting to come to. Once upon a time, it felt likeeveryone was behind Bush, doing their patriotic dutyand keeping their mouths shut, no matter where theships course seemed to head. Those of who spokeout, whether it was against the war, torture, or evenseemingly mundane things like the economy, werequickly and efficiently silenced. We were marginal-ized, pushed to the edge of the debate and labeled ascrazy (which, undoubtedly, some of us were), as liber-als (which some of us are), or as both (Ted Kennedy).

And yet, it appears, much like modern teen-age fashion, what was once out is now in again. It is nolonger viewed as political suicide to denounce the

war, torture of prisoners, or even the administrationshandling of natural disasters. Perhaps, if I may be sobold to suggest it, political dissent has achieved someform of vogue, a kind of social chic, among those withany measurable influence on society (read: the mediaand celebrities). Representative Jack Murtha, who

was once denounced as a crackpot for calling for the withdrawal of troops immediately from Iraq, is nowlooked upon in a sort of awe for having the huevos to stand up to the Republican dogma hanging overWashington like a bad Los Angeles smog cloud.

As I watch all of this unfold, and the mediaslowly begin to say, perhaps we shouldnt haveagreed with everything the administration told us,

well, I cant help but smile and realize just how damnbrilliant this administration is. Absolute genius!

Anyone who knows me has probably alreadycalled the mental health institution at this point, butallow me a moment to explain.

The Bush Administration, along with thehelp of expert spin surgeons like Karl Rove (which isspelled much like Karl Marx, just for reference), hasmanaged the national discourse better than Joe Mon-tana running a two-minute offense. All the talk, allthe dissent, has been controlled. If anyone with any

significant amount of clout felt like saying somethingdemeaning or contrary to what the administration was vocalizing, the administration simply marginal-ized those voices with a barrage of conservative

views crying foul.How un-American of you to say that!The idea that President Bush has no plan for

this country is absurd.Lets get back to the real debate, Mr. Colmes.Rinse, repeat, and voila! It suddenly becomes

obvious to the average American worker that Demo-crats, and the left in general, are only interested indemeaning our commander-in-chief and distracting

us from the real debates, like why gay marriage is horriblyevil (instead of some war overseas people keep talkingabout). Despite the possibility that the administration usedsome questionable means to persuade the masses (releas-ing news clips produced by the propaganda departmentto run in conventional news channels), and even somepossibly illegal ones (anyone remember Valerie Plame?Didnt think so.), it remains fact that they were completelysuccessful in controlling and shaping the debate as itevolved in the country.

Now we see this slow change through the media, atide of people rallying against the administration. If youreso smart, T.D., why isnt the administration shutting thesepeople up? you ask. Well, the fact of the matter is that theyno longer need to. The administration, and the RepublicanParty in general, has beat the Democratic Party to such abloody pulp that if there was a referee, hed call for a TKO.Theres nothing left of the Democrats; theyre fragmentedand disarrayed. The Bush administration knows betterthan hit a man when hes down (thats just not American,after all), and so we now hear the multitudes that had beenpreviously suppressed.


30/36politics / 30

Of course, it would be ridiculous to think that theadministration would lose control of the situation at hand;sure, the administration openly came out and admitted itmight have listened in on your weekly phone calls to yourgirlfriend in Afghanistan, but really, it wasnt illegal. Sure,they admit the war may have been misguided, but hell,

were there, so wed better finish the job. The conserva-tives have gotten extremely proficient in giving the left justenough rope to hang themselves with, and the Democrats

seemingly do it with glee.Of course, this is not to say that public opinionhasnt reacted to the administrations mess-ups; Bushs pollnumbers remain at basement level, and show little signof jumping up. Republican representatives and senatorsseem torn in following their leader or distancing them-selves from what seems to be scandal after scandal. Butlets face it; the fact that the Democrats lack a coherentstrategy to fight back lets the Republicans sleep at night(most likely on a Tempurpedic mattress).

Until the left can find a galvanizing force to bringthem back to relevancy, even I cant help but sit back andapplaud the administrations brilliant maneuvers. Its pure

textbook marketing; now, if only the Democrats could getto the library and read it.

Get more T. Dalley Waterhaus and a 24-hour politicsbuffet at www.cesium-online.com

cs

Wells is the new master of understated post-modern angst...this should be his introduction to

literary circles everywhere.-The Omaha Review

[Wells] develops scenarios youcould only dream of, and thenforget as soon as you wake.

-The New Criticism

Spectacular...it reads likesomething from a much more

established author.-KMR

A son back from Iraq. A husband busy collecting

bodies. A wife addicted to disaster

coverage. A family unwraveling to its

fractured conclusion.

introducting Peter Wellsincendiary debut novel,

Salvaging the Dead

Available in May fromthe Greenbourgh Press

and bookstores everywherewww.theGreenboughPress.com


31/36politics / 31

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(Why No News isGood News)

It doesnt take a genius of any sort to realize that ourcountry is divided in its ideologies. We have one grouppopulating the big cities and costal areas that vote alongfairly liberal lines, and we have another from the Southand Midwest that typically lean towards the conservative.This, on its own, is not a large shock by any means, as ithas statistically always been the case; the people in themiddle of America (frequently referred to as, the BibleBelt) are often raised in environments with more conser-

vative roots, focusing around a sturdy work ethic and theidea that the government should mind its own business, while the masses in city centers experience a plethora of ideas and ethics melting together.

Historically, these two political viewpoints alwaysseemed to get along and respect each other, inhabitingthe national realm with a sense of dignity, and an under-standing that both sides were present for a reason, likesome sort of Western ying and yang . Thats not to say thatthe Republicans and the Democrats always cooperated(which was often far from the case), but it should be notedthat people were once more able to envision both sides of

the debate, and simply put, it got things done. Yet, in todays national climate, it is becoming

evident that this sort of political happy-medium is disap-pearing, and a sizeable gap is widening between the rightand the left. A look at the headlines of any major paper

will most likely reference Democratic filibusters over Re-publican appointments and Republican threats to utilizethe ominous-sounding nuclear option . Poll numbers illus-trate the fact even more vividly; a CBS poll reports that in

1980, only 43% of respondents felt there were large, majordifferences between the two national political parties; in1998, that number jumped to 63%. The poll also reportsthat 51% of respondents feel that George W. Bush has di-

vided people, while only 32% of people feel that he hasunited America.

This slow growing division has become moreevident than ever. These days, the word liberal is bandiedabout like an obscenity among conservatives, using it as ablanket term to describe anyone that adheres to the Dem-ocratic platform, even if they still remain fairly centeredin their ideologies. Any mention of universal health care

Essay by Paul C. Middleton


33/36politics / 33

brings about comparisons to Communism, and lists of themost liberal senators appear in the media every year

with growing focus, reading like a blacklist, a condemna-tion of Democratic voting records.

Likewise, the term conservative is tossed about oncollege campuses and in Starbucks coffee shops the same

way; liberals look upon the right as people lacking soulsand compassion, willing to hand government (and possi-bly their own mothers) over to corporate control, when in

reality, a person may define him or herself as a conserva-tive simply because they dislike taxes. Aligning a person with the Christian right has become an even more dubiousdistinction, conjuring images of religious zealotry and anappetite for abortion clinic bombings.

The two parties refuse to talk to each other andkeep to themselves, never attempting to engage in aclean, honest debate. When legislation stalls in Congress,Democrats and Republicans jump to blame each other forthe bottleneck and accuse the opposite side of partisanpolitics. Each year, the tacticsgrow dirtier, with the bestexample being George W.

Bushs attacks on John Kerrys Vietnam service in the 2004presidential campaign, whereKerrys service and valor

were openly questioned andtarnished (although it should be noted that Democrats arecertainly guilty of similar things, such as forged NationalGuard records showing Bush skipped out on duty.). Thesesentiments of discontent are prevailing not only in Wash-ington, but across the country as we all take sides and re-fuse to look over the political divide separating us.

But what is to blame for this growing polarization, andmore importantly, is there a way to restore a semblance of mod-eration (or at least sanity) to our nations political thought?

That, of course, is a bit of a loaded question, asthere are undoubtedly a variety of causes for the politi-cal gap. But while it is certainly not a complete answer,a likely source is todays popular media. Organizationsthat specialize in the delivery of the news are themselvesbecoming polarized and staking claims to territory onceuntouched by traditional news outlets. And this is quicklytransferring to the public.

Perhaps the most influential are television offer-ings, as it is most readily identified as the publics primarysource of news (a Pew Research Center [PRC] study putsthe percentage of people relying on the television for newsat 74%). Some time ago, long before I was even born, theonly sources for news on television were the three majornetworks: ABC, CBS, and NBC. Because the viewers choic-es were limited to the big three, competition was relativelytame, with networks primarily competing for the big scoop.

And then came the spate of cable news channels, begin-ning with CNN in 1980, and the fight for audience share

was on. Networks were not only fighting to be the first tobreak a story, but were trying to keep the audiences atten-tion around the clock. All of these new channels professedthe same journalistic standards as other news outlets, andyet seemed to cater to certain segments of the population,

all in an attempt to garner ratings.News channel biases are obvious to most consum-

ers of cable television, and the PRC shows that 72% of people believe news channels only report on one side of an issue, which is not at all false. For example, Fox News,

which bills itself as, fair and balanced, is often earmarkedas the conservative channel of choice, hosting fare suchas The OReilly Factor and Special Report with Brit HumeThese shows make an effort to present opinionated view-

points on the days news, which tend to be more conserva-tive in nature. Likewise, CNN (as to a lesser extent MSNBC)has been cast the more liberal choice, where shows like

Anderson Cooper 360 advertise the asking of probingquestions of those in charge. CNN has famously been la-beled by critics, such as the group Accuracy in Media, asthe Clinton News Network, or Clearly Not Neutral. PBSfeatures News Hour , and is viewed by many people as theultra-liberal choice because of outspoken criticism of Re-publican administrations, although PBS lacks the viewing

exposure of CNN.This matches up with poll-

ing done by the PRC, which

shows that the televisionchoices people make arequickly becoming linkedto their ideologies. Overhalf of Fox News viewers

describe themselves as conservative (52%), compared toonly 36% of CNNs audience. This demonstrates that whenpeople tune into news channels, they are more often thannot looking for affirmation of their existing beliefs, ratherthan confirmation of objective facts. This presents a quan-dary to traditional journalistic practices; traditional jour-nalism espouses the unbiased telling of stories, but thesenews networks blur those long-standing rules by deliver-ing the news with a slant, whether the slant is pronouncedor not.

Our problem of political division partly arises fromthe fact that viewers develop loyalties to these networks,and thus begin the process of polarization in their thoughts.Fox News is generally more supportive of the current Bushadministration than the other major cable networks, andpredictably, people that frequently tune into Fox Newsfind fewer problems in the way the country is governed(CBS polls show that 75% of Republicans feel the countryis headed in the right direction). Likewise, since CNN andMSNBC typically ask tough questions (MSNBCs Hardball with Chris Matthews makes a living off of this), viewers willoften find themselves being critical of the administrationin office (the same CBS polls show 83% of Democrats feelthe country is headed in the wrong direction).

However, the blame can hardly be limited to thetelevision side of the media. The internet, and political blog-ging more specifically, have opened news consumers up toan exponentially greater set of ideas. Blogs have allowedany person with a computer the chance to share their views

with the world, and are a wonderful step towards grassrootspolitical involvement; however, when people take to theinternet to become informed, they still tend to gravitatetowards sites that share their same ideology. Conservative

Organizations that specialize in thedelivery of the news are themselves

becoming polarized and staking claims toterritory once untouched by traditional

news outlets.


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readers will be more likely to surf to the blog, Blogs for Bush , for example, while liberal readers will be found on websites like Left is Right . The major news networks alloperate blogs as well, but they remained aligned withtheir viewing demographics ideologies, and usually offerlittle extra insight into the political happenings of the day.While unbiased news sources abound on the internet (theBBCs international news site remains one of the best), itseems that people are more inclined to stay with their own

party, which rarely avoids spin andcontinues to propagate existingbeliefs, even if they prove to be er-roneous.

It should be noted at thispoint that print news, a longtimemainstay of news organizations (as it was obviously presentbefore television was even conceived), continues its de-cade-long slide, in popularity, according to the PRC, withonly 42% of Americans reporting that they read a newspa-per yesterday (down from 58% in 1994). This is occurring

while many academic and independent studies of main-stream print media, such as The New York Times and The

Washington Post , show that they are often the most objectivereporters of the news, despite allegations of bias from bothsides of the political spectrum. People are ignoring the onesource of unbiased news, in favor of party propaganda.

So now that we know about the polarization of themost popular forms of media, the question remains as to

whether we can do anything about it, or if its even a prob-lem at all.

Polarization of public political sentiment is cer-tainly not going to go away anytime soon, but it shoulddefinitely be a warning sign and red flag for people thatare interested in a productive public debate. As peoplecontinue to subscribe to news channels that deliver factsgeared to one segments beliefs, audiences will be moreand more likely to see other sides of a debate as wrong, because the opposing ideas are not represented by theirsource of choice, whether it is Fox News or a trendy new

blog. This makes working with disparate groups and par-ties increasingly difficult, and limits the amount that wecan get done, because of a lack of consensus. This can onlyserve to harm our country.

This is not to say that a person should not listen tothe views of their political party of choice; the great thingabout our society is that you are free to read what you like.However, when news consumers are looking for unbiasedinformation about the latest national disaster, election or

congressional debate, consum-ers should be conscious aboutthe source they turn to, and howit affects what they hear. Viewerscan make decisions to turn notonly to their favorite blogs or

news channels, but also to news sources that are known fortheir impartiality in the reporting (such as The New York Times or the BBC) for a second opinion. Of course, we allknow the world is becoming a busier and busier place,and most will argue that they dont have time to check thefacts of one source against another; I would argue that intodays complex political climate, where decisions made

across the planet can have huge effects on Americans,knowledge is the ultimate power, and we cannot afford tolimit our knowledge to any one source.

Through a little effort to examine all sides of anissue or debate, we are able to better cooperate with eachother, and in turn, accomplish more as citizens. By stop-ping to read that headline, you connect yourself with thenational debate that affects everyone. By reading both aliberal and conservative viewpoint, we become more bal-anced people.

And isnt that what we need right now anyway?

Check out www.cesium-online.com for more cynicalpolitical opinions.

People are ignoring the one sourceof unbiased news, in favor of party

propoganda.

cs

Check out writing from...Chuck DooleyT. Dalley WaterhausBrian TambascioDavid SurreySusan StuartTristan AbbottRon SandvikDave Donovanand more...

Art. Media. Culture. Politics. Continued.

www.cesium-online.comG o u r m e t C o o k i n g . c o mfish poultry beef pork vegetarian


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(Upcoming Events)Thursday, March 30, 2006

Are you dying to see some great stand-up comedy that leaves you tearing up and gasping for air? Would you settle for

some amateur comedy? Penguins Comedy Club, located in downtown Cedar Rapids, will be hosting Amateur Night,showcasing the finest non-professional talent in the area. Look for a superb five minute set from Cesiums own BrianTambascio, and make sure to head back on April 13 th for the Amateur Night Contest, where the best of the best will beselected. Showtime is at 7:00, tickets available at the door. Saturday, April 8, 2006

The Lampost Theatre & Coffeehouse, in association with the Hearst Center for the Arts and Filmnotes.com, will show-case a night of creative philosophizing with the first annual Why Am I Here? Film Festival. Amateur filmmakers fromEastern Iowa will screen films ranging from 30 seconds to 30 minutes, all in search of answering the question, why?

The Lampost Theatre & Coffeehouse is located on Seerley Boulevard, just blocks away from the University of NorthernIowa. Check out filmnotes.com/whyfilmfest for more info.

Saturday, April 8, 2006

Spring is here, and that can only mean one thing: new clothing lines. The place to be is at the annual University of North-ern Iowa Fashion Show, produced by students in the Textiles and Apparel Program. The theme is Style Perspectives,and it will feature designs ranging from evening wear to wearable art. The show takes place in the Lang Hall Auditorium,and doors open at 7:30. Make sure to stick around after the show for a portfolio review and reception at the Center forMulticultural Education in Maucker Union.

Saturday, April 22, 2006

Remember a few years back, when camouflage was all the rage? Yeah, neither do we, but we are told it has officially re-turned, courtesy of the University of Northern Iowa Art Department. They will play host to the Camouflage: Art, Scienceand Popular Culture, mini-conference, focusing on all things camouflage, from the artistic, scientific and psychologicalside of things, to military and fashion-related concealment and deception. It will feature half-hour talks and slide showsfrom over 37 world-renowned scholars throughout the day. Make sure to wear your finest M*A*S*H t-shirt.

To pre-register, send a $20 check (made out to the UNI Department of Art) to:Camouflage ConferenceUNI Art DepartmentCedar Falls, IA 50614-0362Please remember to indicate the name of the person registering and contact information (mailing address and email).On-site registration is also available.

Send questions to Prof. Roy R. Behrens at [email protected]. Tell him Cesium sent you.

A quick look at the events you might find Cesium at, if we ever left the office.


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