Distrust in themselves, school refusal / school phobia

By Ana RuscanuDistrust in yourself School refusal/ school phobiaDistrust of the World and Yourself As doubt spreads, nothing seems to satisfy. You begin to feel a churning fear that no one and nothing in the world will give you fulfillment. Worse, you doubt your own life. You feel that because of your negative state you are incapable of ever extricating yourself from your miseries. Distrust of the world and of yourself is a most profound doubt. As the doubt becomes interiorized, it extends to your ego your sense of self. You begin to doubt your capacity ever to be happy. You may doubt the capacity of yourself to know anything. Certainly your self-esteem is shot down. Your self-confidence cracks apart. You feel little joy in being you. You sense your ego is only a makeshift structure which holds you together each flimsy day. You dont have an intrinsic sense of who you are or that you are a significant and worthwhile person.

This invasion of doubt motivates many suffering people to seek professional counseling. Questions of what makes life worthwhile, and why, result from this shattering of confidence in the outer world, in others, or oneself. Too many people today feel their lives have substantially no value and thereforelife itselfhas no substantial value. They run about the planet killing, shooting, and torturing other people in the most insane manner. Doubt of one's worth or capacity for happiness is a highly significant problem, especially in an age which involves considerable disorientation and regular shake-ups of society. Also, at this time young people dread the earth will not survive that they will not be able to grow old. Even theexistenceof the earth and life itself is in doubt.

School refusalSchool refusalis the refusal to attend school due to emotionaldistress. School refusal differs fromtruancyin that children with school refusal feelanxietyorfeartowards school, whereastruantchildren generally have no feelings of fear towards school, often feelingangryorboredwith it instead.While this was formerly calledschool phobia, the termschool refusalwas coined to reflect that children have problems attending school for a variety of different reasons and these reasons might not be the expression of a true phobia, such as separation or social anxiety.

Symptoms: Symptoms of school refusal include the child saying they feel sick often, or waking up with a headache, stomachache, or sore throat. If the child stays home from school, these symptoms might go away, but come back the next morning before school. Additionally, children with school refusal may have crying spells or throw temper tantrums. Warning signs of school refusal include: frequent complaints about attending school frequent tardiness or unexcused absences absences on significant days (tests, speeches, physical education class) frequent requests to call or go homeexcessive worrying about a parent when in school frequent requests to go to the nurses office because of physical complaints crying about wanting to go home

What Parents Can Do

It is important for parents to keep trying to get their child to go back to school. The longer a child stays out of school, the harder it will be to return. However, it may be hard to accomplish as when forced they are prone totemper tantrums, crying spells,psychosomatic orpanicsymptoms and threats of self-harm. These problems quickly fade if the child is allowed to stay home.The most important thing a parent can do is obtain a comprehensive evaluation from a mental health professional.That evaluation will reveal the reasons behind the school refusal and can help determine what kind of treatment will be best. Your childs pediatrician should be able to recommend a mental health professional in your area who works with children.

The following tips will help you and your child develop coping strategies for school anxieties and other stressful situations.Expose children to school in small degrees, increasing exposure slowly over time. Eventually this will help them realize there is nothing to fear and that nothing bad will happen.Talk with your child about feelings and fears, which helps reduce them.Emphasize the positive aspects of going to school: being with friends, learning a favorite subject, and playing at recess.Arrange an informal meeting with your childs teacher away from the classroom.Meet with the school guidance counselor for extra support and direction.Try self-help methods with your child. In addition to a therapists recommendations, a good self-help book will provide relaxation techniques. Be open to new ideas so that your child is, too.Encourage hobbies and interests. Fun is relaxation, and hobbies are good distractions that help build self-confidence.Help your child establish a support system. A variety of people should be in your childs lifeother children as well as family members or teachers who are willing to talk with your child should the occasion arise.

Causative factors

Factors that can cause reluctance to attend school can be divided into four categories. These categories have been developed based on studies in the United States under the leadership of Professor Christopher Kearney. Some students may be affected by several factors at once.The child possibly wants to avoid school-related issues and situations that cause unpleasant feelings in her or him, such as anxiety, depression, or psychosomatic symptoms. The reluctance to attend school is one symptom that can indicate the presence of a larger issue, such as anxiety disorder, depression, sleep disorder, separation anxiety or panic disorder.

The child may want to avoid tests, presentations, group work, specific lessons, or interaction with other children.The child may want attention from significant people outside of school, such as parents or older acquaintances.The child possibly wants to do something more enjoyable outside of school, like practice hobbies, play computer games, watch movies, play with friends such as riding bikes, etc., or learnautodidactictly.Other factors can be:Anxiety aboutacademic achievementandbeing testedcan arise on the basis of inflated claims by teachers and/or parents, but also unrealistic ambitions of the upset child themselves.

School refusal may arise as a response to bullying.Shynessor asocial phobiacan contribute to school refusal.The child might worry about parents or siblings, for instance, a parent with substance abuse, or a parent who physically abuses other family members.Some students may refuse school due to anxiety or fears of emergency drills, such asfire,lockdown,tornado, and shelter in place drills.

Conclusions:Often, however, the person you cant trust is yourself. Your feelings are not about the other person, even if you do feel them only in this relationship. They are about you. When you feel highly possessive or desperate in relation to another person, it is almost always because you have not yet developed your own inner feelings of safety.As soon as you trust yourself you will know how to live- Johann Wolfgang von GoetheWhen we develop trust and confidence in our own abilities to overcome the obstacles we face in life, trust in others follows naturally.School refusalis the refusal to attend school due to emotionaldistress.

Sites from where I chose some information:http://www.adaa.org/living-with-anxiety/children/school-refusalhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/School_refusalhttp://www.themystic.org/turning/distrust.htmhttp://www.purposepowercoaching.com/site/?p=118#sthash.SyHHm2LB.dpuf