BLIZZARD

Written by

carlos camejoFS 36011.3.15

Based on, If Any

AddressPhone Number

ii.

BLIZZARD - BY CARLOS CAMEJO

HAM - FS 360

11/3/2015

INT. A MAN’S DREAM - NIGHT

A man’s dream recalling the events of several weeks before that led to this.

An article in a newspaper reads: “North Dakota mayoral candidate, Gordon McAllister dies under mysterious ‘circumstances’”

Several newspaper articles from across the state and nation dealing with it can be seen.

“Who Is Spencer Brown? Retired operatic duo of Spencer and Lily have new ‘Handel’ on small-town Midwest politics”

“Third party candidate, previously at 10%, has meteoric rise with just weeks left”

“The Fargo North Stars, the newest MLB expansion team, are 0-162. Why does God allow suffering?”

EXT. HOLY TRINITY PARISH CHURCH - AFTERNOON

A man and a woman dressed in black coming out of a funeral are approached by rapid-fire camera lights and microphones going up to him. The woman is wearing a dark black hat and sunglasses to avoid paparazzi.

A bagpiper plays something mournful as mourners leave the church.

MANNo comment. No comment, thank you.

A JOURNALIST with a camera sticks a microphone out.

JOURNALISTSpencer Brown! Spencer Brown! I am with Noticias 12 Hermosillo. Spencer? Mr. Brown?

They go into a black car and drive off.

EXT. MIDWESTERN TOWN - MORNING

A small town in the middle of North Dakota sparsely decorated with houses and shops.

SNOW begins to fill the landscape - thick, heavy, ruinous SNOW.

INT. BEDROOM - HOUSE

The bedroom is dim and largely quiet save for the sound of roaring snow and wind outside.

Decorated with modest furniture, some political signs and pictures of a couple.

LILY SMITH (31) fumbles around the bed, half-awake and stumbling to turn on the light -- the snow wakes her up.

Her husband, SPENCER BROWN (33) sleeps next to her and grumbles in his sleep.

LILYSpencer, wake up - look outside.

SPENCER(grumbling in sleep)

No, I don’t care what you do. Chinga tu madre.

She looks at him sort of disturbed. But nudges him to wake up.

He looks outside much to his dismay. The snow isn’t letting up.

SPENCER (CONT’D)I heard flurries last week. You’re kidding me.

Lily sits upright and turns the TV on to a weather forecast showing North Dakota under a blizzard warning. Flashing, alarming colors.

TV NEWS...And Baylor defeats Ole Miss 78-0, causing the South to rise again. And now to the weather.

(weatherman comes on the screen)

2.

(MORE)

Yes, today, a low front is coming over the region, bringing with it heavy snow to the Bismarck metro. All schools are closed. Unless you are in labor or on fire, stay home.

Spencer takes a deep breath. The show must go on.

SPENCERIn labor or on fire... sounds better than this.

LILYI’ve been both. No it isn’t.

SPENCERYou’ve been on fire?

LILY(beat)

I went to college.

They get out of the bed and talk while Spencer gets dressed down the stairs to the main hallway.

His patience worsens with each breath.

LILY (CONT’D)Weren’t you supposed to go to the polls today?

SPENCERDo not “past tense” me. Goldberg and I are supposed to go to the headquarters at city hall.

LILYIt looks like World War III outside and you’re still going. You’re kidding me, right?

SPENCERThe election is today. I have to prep my headquarters and get my managers there.

LILYTry and get it rescheduled.

SPENCER(making his point, enraged)

The people of Willisberg are voting right fucking now!

3.

TV NEWS (CONT'D)

(MORE)

We are a strong people who do not get fazed by snow, damn it.

LILY(air quotes)

The “people of Willisberg” can wait for 2 feet of snow.

SPENCERNo, they can’t. I’m going to the headquarters whether you like it or not.

LILYYou don’t listen, do you. It looks like hell outside and you want to drive 30 minutes.?

(to hell with it)Fine. Go. But keep in touch, at least.

He opens the door to go outside. Blasted by snow and wind. Not fun.

SPENCERLily, I’ll be back at 5. Be seeing you.

The door is slammed shut by the wind, bringing in a little snow with it.

The snow piles, causing Spencer to trek outside slowly through the thickness.

This goes on for a while until he reaches his car, a BROWN HONDA sedan.

He enters and begins to make an effort.

INT/EXT. HOUSE - DAY

Lily opens the door to the house slightly ajar to peek outside and check on him.

Spencer insists he’ll be fine despite his dingy metal turd with wheels.

SPENCER(from the car)

I drove to Yellowstone in this piece of metal ass, it can take some hits!

(starts up car;

4.

SPENCER (CONT'D)

(MORE)

completely stalled)Wait. Motherf-

(tries again)Lily!

Lily motions for him to wait.

She comes outside dressed for the weather - hastily putting a coat - and runs outside in the cold.

EXT. HOUSE - DRIVEWAY - DAY

Lily runs outside to the stalled brown car, unable to move in some feet of snow.

Stunned at what has just happened.

LILYWhoa.

SPENCERIt’s terrible but it’s nothing new. We can try again.

Getting the car out of the driveway, take 2: Spencer tries again to move his car even an inch out to the driveway and on his way.

No dice.

Spencer lets out an audible, exasperated, disappointed groan. Gets out of the car and kicks it.

SPENCER (CONT’D)Shit!

LILYCalm down! You’ll break the thing.

He walks inside the house, furious. This is not supposed to happen. This was never supposed to happen. Lily follows.

SPENCERI’ve broken it before. This is something else!

LILYWell, maybe you should’ve planned beforehand.

5.

SPENCER (CONT'D)

SPENCERMaybe that fucking weatherman who predicted “2-3 inches” should get a new job!

LILYCalm down. Find a plan B.

SPENCEROK. I’ll maybe call Goldberg.

LILYShe’s in Bismarck, right?

SPENCERAnd she drives a pinche-

(stops himself from cursing again)

That’s right, you’re from Tucson.

He goes over to a space in the house with phone reception, this time the living room.

INT. HOUSE - LIVING ROOM

His saving grace. The woman he picked to be second in command should Willisberg ever have its own John Wilkes Booth - JANET GOLDBERG.

He gets on the phone to call her and hopefully make the headquarters in time.

For some long seconds, there’s just a dial tone. After a while, though...

A sigh of relief comes over him. Finally.

SPENCERGoldberg.

(chatter over the phone)Yes?

(more chatter)My car’s stuck in the driveway. In the snow. Come down from North Willis.

(more chatter)OK.

(more chatter)What?

(more chatter)Just tell me when you get here, OK. Bye.

6.

He hangs up, knowing there’s a modicum of hope.

Goes over to Lily ecstatic in the other room.

INT. HOUSE - KITCHEN

He goes to where Lily is now and makes himself a cup of coffee.

SPENCERGoldberg’s coming and we’ll be off out east pretty soon. Finally.

LILYGood.

SPENCERIt won’t take long.

LILYYou have 20 minutes to kill. What are you going to do?

He goes outside again to give starting his car a final, honest effort. Maybe it’ll move.

EXT. HOUSE

Spencer goes outside to give starting the car one last try. After this, he better hope Goldberg comes.

He goes inside the car and does what he did the first two times, which was start up the car and try to move it anywhere at all.

It finally moved. An expression of joy comes across Spencer’s face... that quickly turns to regret, sadness and disappointment.

The car comes to a halt, not because of the snow but because of large, billowing smoke coming out of the hood. He gets out and pops it open.

Much to his dismay, the engine is completely busted.

SPENCERLily!

LILY(she goes back outside)

What?

7.

SPENCERThe car’s busted.

LILYI can see it from here, inside the house! What did you do?

SPENCERGood question! I think I overworked it a little.

LILYA little? I don’t think you have a car anymore.

SPENCERWater under the bridge.

He comes inside the house and tries to kill time waiting for Goldberg.

About 20 minutes pass when a black Cadillac is driven by someone who probably should... not be driving. Slides it into his mailbox.

Spencer hopes its what he needs right now, but instead a GUY comes out. Blonde, 20, wearing thick-rimmed glasses.

Runs up to the front door and rings the bell, handing out a pamphlet.

RANDOM GUYHello?

SPENCERNo.

The door closes. And is opened again.

RANDOM GUYSir, I just need to-

SPENCERNo!

Yet again.

RANDOM GUYBut, sir-

SPENCERBin Laden lives here. It’s dangerous. Go away.

8.

He runs away in fear. The door closes.

INT/EXT. HOUSE - AFTERNOON

Spencer recognizes who it happens to be - actually for this time, JANET GOLDBERG (34), blonde, thick Dublin accent, dressed in typical lawyer fashion and also his running mate.

She rings the doorbell and comes inside.

SPENCERJanet, hello.

JANETYou called?

SPENCERMy car’s having trouble, so we need to carpool to city hall.

JANETFor what?

SPENCER(uhhhhhh?)

The election headquarters.

JANETOh, those. Yeah, those were postponed until next week. Here’s the letter from the mayor.

SPENCERHow did I not know about this?

JANETBecause it’s 2015 and Revolutionary War vet Tom still doesn’t have a cell phone. Here.

A printed out letter from the mayor... Mayor... his last name looks like a cat danced on the keyboard.

The letter has his own personal email at the top, some very cheesy, vaguely pornographic username from 1992, and the text of the letter deals with how election machines have failed.

Lily comes in and notices her.

SPENCERThe election’s been postponed!

9.

LILYWait, why?

JANETIt’s the first year we’re trying electronic voting booths... and the server crashed.

SPENCERYou’re kidding me.

JANETNope. Talk to the mayor. Dude wanted to be all hip and trendy. Remember “Willisberg Presents Carmina Burana?”

LILYThat is how I met Spencer. And that’s the only memory I want to keep. On a different note, it seems you just wasted an entire day.

SPENCER(word can’t come to him)

Well, “wasted”... more like, eh... yeah, we wasted an entire day.

JANETSo, next week, we move on. Next week is when the election is. Meet me at city hall.

SPENCERAll right.

Everyone just nods and goes along with it.

LILYCan I come?

SPENCERI guess I’m a politican now... which means you come by default.

She laughs.

LILYJanet, do you want coffee or something? Warm up?

JANETPlease. It’s cold as hell outside.

10.

They get some coffee and sit down.

SPENCERSo what happened?

JANETI go to vote and the machine doesn’t work. No one’s worked. So, Tom calls and tells me that it’s not just Willisberg, it’s county wide.

LILYOh, crap.

JANETHe loves trying to be new, nothing typical.

SPENCERSeems pretty typical of Mayor...

(tries to remember his name)

Mayor...

JANETTom... he’s from some island nation no one’s ever seen.

SPENCERSo, the election is just postponed. It’s election night tonight for the rest of the country. What are WE going to do?

JANETMy husband got me tickets to the Fargo North Stars.

SPENCER(horrified)

But they’re terrible.

JANETBingo.

SPENCERThey’re the worst team in Major League Baseball.

JANETAnd that’s how he scored tickets for basically nothing. That’s his job.

11.

SPENCERAnd he is...

JANETJim Bob.

SPENCERAnd he’s a ticket scalper?

JANETJudaism welcomes all types. I saw him at a wedding in Ibiza and I guess he came over. Ticket scalping is how he makes money.

LILYI... kind of want to come.

JANETOf course. Hold up, let me call him to get the tickets.

She goes over to where there’s reception and calls Jim Bob.

A calm conversation at first, but a loud “WHAT?!” on her end elicits a switch to Spanish.

For a good minute, no one can understand what she’s saying.

Spencer turns to Lily.

SPENCERYou’re from Tucson and you went to San Diego State for a semester. What’s she saying?

LILYI don’t know. It is kinda hot.

SPENCEROh, who cares? Focus on the task at hand.

LILYJust because I’m from “Mexico in denial” doesn’t mean anything, Spence.

Janet gets off the phone.

JANETHe’s in jail. Apparently, ticket scalping is a crime here.

12.

LILYWell. That’s no fun. What should we do now?

A gun shot reverberates through the town. Loud and piercing in the air.

Everyone’s eyes widen in shock and fear.

SPENCERWhat... the fuck was that? Honest question? It came from the direction of city hall...

JANETThat’s a very good question...

A car pulls up to the house and an old man comes out. TOM (78, slow, short and gray-haired) is the mayor. He rings the doorbell. They all come up and open.

TOMHello, all.

JANETWhat was that noise at city hall, sir?

TOMI was just cleaning my old Civil War-era musket. It’s a family heirloom.

Janet whispers to Spencer. “Told you he’s old as hell.” He nods.

TOM (CONT’D)I’m sorry about the voting booth troubles, by the way. I know it caused you a lot of-

And like a character in a Shakespearean play, the mayor drops dead. Only not as violently.

JANETOh, fuck. He’s dead.

SPENCERWhat should we do now? Lovely question, wife.

They just kinda walk away nonchalantly and call an ambulance.

FADE OUT.

13.

14.