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© Françoise Mathieu 2017 www.tendacademy.com
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© Françoise Mathieu 2017 www.tendacademy.com
SELF-TEST: Assess your Physical and Psychological Resilience
Read each statement carefully. Give yourself points as follows: 2 points if the statement describes what you do every day/almost always, at work, at home, on the road, 1 point if the statement describes what you do sometimes, 0 points if the statement never applies to you.
# Statement Score Body 1 I eat regularly, eating when hungry and stopping just before I feel full 2 I maintain a healthy weight 3 I eat lots of vegetables and fruits throughout the day 4 I choose whole grains, non-processed foods and limit my sugar intake 5 I have healthy snacks with me in my office, on the road and at home 6 I drink at least 8 cups of fluid (water, other healthy options) throughout
my day
7 I use the stairs everywhere possible 8 When possible I walk or cycle to meetings, appointments, shopping &
other outings
9 I use work breaks or lunchtime to stretch, go for a walk or take an exercise class
10 I do activities that strengthen my muscles, bones & improve posture 2 - 3 times a week
11 I do stretching & balancing activities 2 - 3 times a week 12 I accumulate 150 minutes of active living/ increased heart rate every week 13 I get regular preventative and required health care 14 I do physical activities that I find fun 15 I make sure I get enough sleep 16 I limit the amount of screen time I engage in 17 I take regular vacations/time off/day trips Other: Heart 18 I practise deep breathing during stressful times like short deadlines, traffic
jams, etc.
19 I have people I can share things with 20 I practise receiving from others 21 I nurture intimate relationships 22 I deal with situations directly instead of complaining, and I focus on
finding a solution
23 I take time for myself everyday 24 I volunteer for something I find worthwhile 25 I see the glass half full rather than half empty 26 I know when and how to say "no" 27 I accept other people's differences and the things I cannot change 28 I treat myself with loving kindness as I would speak to someone I care
about
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© Françoise Mathieu 2017 www.tendacademy.com
29 I allow myself to cry when needed 30 I smile and laugh daily 31 I engage in play regularly Other: Mind 32 I play challenging games or puzzles 33 I am curious and like to learn new things 34 I break out of my normal routine or do things that are out of my comfort
zone
35 I read literature that is unrelated to work 36 I do things that I am not expert at or in charge of Other: Spirit 37 I take time to self-reflect 38 I know what my values are 39 I have a sense of purpose in life 40 I seek to make a contribution in life 41 I have hope 42 I am aware of the non-material aspects of life 43 I identify what is meaningful to me and notice its place in my life 44 I take time to meditate/pray/contemplate 45 I have experiences of awe 46 I connect with things larger than myself e.g. nature, spiritual group, etc. Other: Professional 47 I take breaks during the workday 48 I take time to connect with co-workers 49 I make quiet time to complete tasks 50 I engage in projects/tasks that are exciting/rewarding 51 I arrange my schedule so no part of the day is "too much" 52 I have a workspace that is comfortable and comforting 53 I get regular work support/consultation 54 I negotiate for my needs (flexible schedule, time off, benefits, pay, etc.) 55 I find my work mentally stimulating 56 I find my work meaningful Other: Total Total your scores and see how your resilience habits rate. Score results:
•1 - 55: You may want to consider making some changes. Choose one thing and start now!
•56- 76: Pretty good! Still consider choosing one thing to change and start now.
•77 +: Wow! You have some great self-care habits. Is there anything you want to build on?
Adapted from: The Power of Full Engagement, by Jim Loehr & Tony Schwartz & Transforming the Pain: A workbook on
Vicarious Traumatization by Karen Saakvitne &Laurie Anne Perlman
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© Françoise Mathieu 2017 www.tendacademy.com
Life/work balance self-test
What’s Draining You?
Excerpted from Cheryl Richardson “Take time for your life” (1999)
Check all that apply to you
Relationships
__There are people in my life who continuously drain energy
__I have unreturned phone calls, e-mails, or letters that need to be handled
__I have an unresolved conflict with a family member
__I lack quality friendships in my life
__I feel a void in my life created by the lack of a romantic partner
__There is someone I need to forgive
__There is a relationship I need to end
__There is a phone call I dread making, and it causes me stress and anxiety
__I’m currently involved in a relationship that compromises my values
__I miss being a part of a loving and supportive community
Add your check marks: _____
Environment
__My car is in need of cleaning and/or repair
__My wardrobe needs updating and/or alterations
__I’d like to live in a different geographic location
__I have appliances that need repair or upgrading
__My home is not decorated in a way that nurtures me
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© Françoise Mathieu 2017 www.tendacademy.com
__My closets and/or basement are cluttered and need to be cleaned
__Repairs need to be done around my home or apartment
__My home is cluttered and disorganized
__I miss having more beauty reflected in my environment
__I watch too much television
Add your check marks: _____
Body, mind and spirit
__I eat food that’s not good for me
__Something about my physical appearance bothers me
__It’s been too long since I’ve been to the dentist
__I do not get the sleep I need to feel fully rested
__I’d like to exercise regularly but never seem to find the time
__I have a health concern for which I’ve avoided getting help
__I have emotional needs that consistently go unmet
__There are books that I’d love to read but never seem to find the time for
__I lack personal interests that are intellectually stimulating
__I lack a spiritual or religious practice in my life
Add your check marks: _____
Work
__I no longer enjoy my job and have a hard time showing up each day
__ My work is stressful and leaves me exhausted at the end of the day
__ My office is disorganized, my desk is a mess, and I have trouble finding what I need
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© Françoise Mathieu 2017 www.tendacademy.com
__ I’m avoiding a confrontation or conflict at work
__ I tolerate bad behaviour from a boss or coworker
__ I am not computer literate, and it gets in the way of my productivity
__ I lack the proper office equipment that I need to do my job well
__ My work does not allow me to express my creativity
__ I know I need to delegate specific tasks but am unable to let go of control
__ I feel overwhelmed with the amount of information that enters my life in the form of email, books, magazines, and mail
Add your check marks: _____
Money
__ I have tax returns that are not filed or taxes that are not paid
__ I pay my bills late
__ I spend more money than I earn
__ I don’t have a plan for my financial future
__ My credit rating is not what I’d like it to be
__ I do not have a regular savings plan
__ I do not have adequate insurance coverage
__ My mortgage rate is too high, and I need to refinance
__ I have debt that needs to be paid off
__ My will is not up to date
Add your check marks: _____
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© Françoise Mathieu 2017 www.tendacademy.com
Add score from each category
Relationships:
Environment:
Body mind and spirit:
Work:
Money:
Are there areas that cause more energy drains than others?
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© Françoise Mathieu 2017 www.tendacademy.com
The Self Care Gauge
Write down 3 warning signs that you are getting overloaded with stress (could be physical, emotional or behavioural): 1. 2. 3.
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© Françoise Mathieu 2017 www.tendacademy.com
Balance Map
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© Françoise Mathieu 2017 www.tendacademy.com
Feeling Effective
What are my training needs?
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
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© Françoise Mathieu 2017 www.tendacademy.com
54321 Exercise
1. Describe 5 things you see in the room.
2. Name 4 things you can feel (“my feet on the floor” or “the air in my nose”)
3. Name 3 things you hear right now (“traffic outside”)
4. Name 2 things you can smell right now (or 2 smells you like)
5. Name 1 good things about yourself
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© Françoise Mathieu 2017 www.tendacademy.com
Low Impact Debriefing
1) Increased Self Awareness
Have you ever shocked or horrified friends or family with a work story that you thought was fairly benign or even funny? Working in this field, we rapidly become desensitized to the trauma and loss we are exposed to daily. Try and become more aware of the stories you tell and the level of detail you provide when telling a story. Ask yourself: Were all those details really necessary to the storytelling? Could you have given a “Coles notes” version and still passed on the necessary information?
2) Fair Warning
We use fair warning in everyday life: If you had to call your sister and tell her that your grandfather has passed away, you would likely start the phone call with “I have some bad news” or “You better sit down”. This allows the listener to brace themselves to hear the story. Why not do the same when debriefing? If I know that you are coming to tell me a traumatic story, I will be prepared to hear this information and it will be less traumatic for me to hear.
3) Consent
Once you have warned the listener, you need to ask for consent. This can be as simple as saying: “I need to debrief something with you, is this a good time?” or “I heard something really hard today, and I could really use a debrief, could I talk to you about it?” The listener then has a chance to decline, or to qualify what they are able/ready to hear.
4) Limited Disclosure
Now that you have received consent from your colleague, you can decide how much to share. I suggest imagining that you are telling the story starting on the outer circle of the story (i.e. the least traumatic information) and slowly move in towards the core (the very traumatic information) at a gradual pace. You may, in the end, need to tell the graphic details, or you may not, depending on how disturbing the story has been for you.
How much detail is enough? How much is too much?
Don’t assume you need to disclose all the details right away. Is sharing the graphic details necessary to the discussion? For example, when discussing a child being removed from the home, you may need to say “the child suffered severe neglect and some physical abuse at the hands of his mother” and that may be enough, or you may in certain instances need to give more detail for the purpose of the clinical discussion.
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© Françoise Mathieu 2017 www.tendacademy.com
My Commonly Used Coping Skills
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Others I Might Want To Try
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© Françoise Mathieu 2017 www.tendacademy.com
Reflection: My Support System Take a few minutes to reflect on and answer the following questions about your social support system. How do I know when I need to access my support system? When I am having a bad day, who do I connect with? Who are my social supports in my work/volunteer life? Who are my social supports in my home/personal life? What areas of my support system do I need to enhance?
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© Françoise Mathieu 2017 www.tendacademy.com
MAKING CHANGES Commitment to changes I could make in the next…
Immediate plan: Can you think of one small step you could take in the very near future to move you closer to this goal? (you could consult a friend/coach/counsellor for additional ideas if you feel stuck here)
Change I could make in the next Week: What do you need to get in place to make this happen?
Change I could make in the next Month: What do you need to get in place to make this happen?
Change I could make in the next Year: What do you need to get in place to make this happen?
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© Françoise Mathieu 2017 www.tendacademy.com
Recommended Resources Compassion Fatigue/Vicarious Trauma The Compassion Fatigue Workbook by Françoise Mathieu (available online at Amazon)
Trauma Stewardship by Laura Van Dernoot Lipsky Organizational Health Building Resilient Teams by Patricia Fisher (available at www.tendacademy.ca)
Is work Killing You? A Doctor’s Prescription for Treating Workplace Stress by David Posen Trauma and the Body Childhood Disrupted: How your Biography Becomes your Biology. Donna Jackson Nakazawa
The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel Van Der Kolk
The Body Bears the Burden: Trauma, Dissociation and Disease by Robert Scaer Stress/Immune System Resilience, Balance & Meaning Workbook by Patricia Fisher (available at www.tendacademy.ca)
When the Body Says No by Gabor Maté Mindfulness & Self-compassion websites and Apps www.franticworld.com/free-meditations-from-mindfulness
www.self-compassion.org
www.mindfulselfcompassion.org
Body Scan link: https://www.mindful.org/a-3-minute-body-scan-meditation-to-cultivate-mindfulness
Ichill App
Headspace App
Calm App Life/Work Balance Take Time for Your Life: a 7 Step Program for Creating the Life You Want by Cheryl Richardson Self Care/Stress Reduction Do One Thing Different: 10 simple ways to change your life by Bill O’Hanlon
Little book of stress relief by David Posen
Simplify Your Life: 100 Ways to Slow Down and Enjoy the Things That Really Matter by Elaine St James