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ATTRACTION CONTROL MONTHLY

PRIVATE

THOUGHTS!

!!!!

“THE HUMILIATION OF

BEING OVERLOOKED BY

MEN”

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The Bad Girl Notice:

Attraction Control Monthly is copyright 2012 – 2016 with all

rights reserved. It is illegal to copy, distribute, or create

derivative works from this book in whole or in part, or to

contribute to the copying, distribution, or creating of derivative

works of this book. Here is the statement on my website

reprinted for your reference:

"©2011, All Rights Reserved. If you try to copy, steal, or

distribute all or any part of my book or this web page without

permission, I will have my attorney contact you and make you

wish that you'd never had such a stupid idea in your life. Count

on it. By purchasing this book, you agree to the following: You

understand that the information contained on this page and in

this book is an opinion, and it should be used for personal

entertainment purposes only. You are responsible for your own

behavior, and none of this book is to be considered legal or

personal advice."

And I expect you to abide by these rules. I regularly and actively

search the Internet for people who violate my copyrights. Now

that we're finished with the bad girl notice, let's learn about how

to build and maintain attraction with a man...

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Hey, it’s Renee here.

I want to talk to you about the

humiliation of being overlooked by men.

I do block this out because it's such a

painful part of my history with men. But

every now and then the memory comes back

and bites me on the ass.

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About 8 or 9 years ago, I was in what

you'd affectionately call "a Bad Place" in my

dating life.

Ugly. Second rate. Stick out like a sore

thumb. These are all the things I felt about

myself.

And worse of all, I really felt alone in

being in that bad place.

One memory really stands out.

It was a night I went out with a couple of

close girlfriends of mine, we had both gotten

dressed up. We went out to a house party of

my friend which happened to be full of males.

There were a few girls, but more males.

I'd say the split was about 70/30.

Anyway, all my friends got male

attention and the guys all looked past me like

I didn't exist.

I don't know if you know that feeling,

maybe you do. Maybe you don't, I guess I hope

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that you don't. But if you do, I really know how

you feel.

You know those moments where you're

walking down the street, and a stranger

comes walking towards you and you start to

decide in your mind whether you should smile

and be friendly or just walk straight past

them, practically ignoring them?

And you decide to be open and smile,

only to find that they walked straight past you

like you didn't even exist on the street when it

was OBVIOUS that you were walking past

them and smiling?

It's not a nice feeling. You know they're a

stranger and all, but still, it's not a nice

feeling. That's how I felt, just times it by

1,000!

I remember, that night, being so hurt

and ashamed that all my other girlfriends

were being 'hit on' but I wasn't....SO humiliated

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in fact, that I actually asked my close

girlfriend this embarrassing question:

"Why do you think men overlook me but

will hit on you and Sam?"

And she looked at me, half grinning, half

deeply in thought.

She thought about it and said....

"I don't know. But if I had to think about

it, I'd say it's because you're not the typical

blond kind of girl that men hit on."

I remember looking away, thinking, ok.

So what exactly can I so about that. I'm not

the typical blonde, so does this mean I'm

doomed to a life of always feeling like I'm the

'less attractive' one?

That sinking feeling you get in the pit of

your stomach sometimes; that's what I felt.

I just nodded and took it like a

professional boxer takes a punch to his face in

the ring. I took it, thinking that my only

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option was to receive that belief about myself

openly and ACCEPT that as my so called fate.

But, it killed me inside.

I remember another time that hurt me

even more.

I was out with a girl from university.

She was tall. About 5 foot 8. Her body

was about as "perfect" as they come. She had

double D breasts and a great figure.

I liked her a lot, we had fun together.

Again, I always convinced myself I was

her sidekick. The "cute" girl who goes along

with the "hot" girl.

We were out dancing. At the time I

thought she was a good friend (again, silly me.

But that's another story).

So we were out dancing and there was an

attractive black man whom we both noticed

and thought was good looking.

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Of course, he noticed us looking and took

up the opportunity.

He followed up to the upstairs part of the

club and when we were sort of cornered,

approached my friend. I think he smiled at

her and had a moment of "oh crap, forgot to

say hi to the friend.." so he gave me a quick

handshake just to make things less awkward.

He approached my friend and tried to

pick her up. She actually had a boyfriend at

the time and so she then jokingly told him

that she was already taken and he shook his

head in disbelief and said: "Oh, you're one of

THOSE women."

My friend laughed and said "oh but my

friend here is available", and made a swiping

hand gesture towards me and then looked

away from me, sipping her drink and eyeing

the dance floor."

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The guy looked at her and gave a

0.00002 second sideways glance towards me

and made a nervous laugh and then left.

Nice.

Totally awesome.

The last painfully humiliating memory I

have of my dating days was again with my uni

friend. This time, we were out with another

girl from university. They were both tall (5

foot 8) and big busted.

If you know me at all, you know I'm only

of slight build and am petite, and let's just say

my breast size isn't "large". So it was VERY

easy for me to compare myself to these girls

and feel totally, shatteringly UNLIKEABLE by

men!

Now, I never feel this inadequate, but I'm

getting to that.

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We went out to the beach one day, as a

group of 3 happy girls do on a summer day

together as a break from university.

I had been approached a few days before

by the owner of a juice bar, and he had asked

to drive all the way out to come and see me.

So I said I didn't have time but he could

come and see me and my friends at the beach,

to which he agreed.

So he came, and he was very respectful

and genuine about spending time with me (He

had driven a whole hour).

But I'll never forget, I was sitting on the

beach while my two girlfriends went for a dip

in the water, and 5 minutes after he arrived,

they walked towards us, water dripping off

their bodies and in their bikinis and his mouth

dropped open.

“Are they your FRIENDS???!!"

I said "yep".

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He said "wow. They're just a little bit

good looking."

Then I thought: Great. Thanks. That's a

nice thing to say when you're out here to see

me.

Anyway, we went out to a restaurant

after that, and he was in conversation with

the other two girls and me, but they seemed to

get along so well. He didn't make a go for my

friends but...at the time I was torturing myself

with feeling of inadequacy.

Writing about this is hard enough. Re-

living the memories make me wonder how I

managed to cope.

And that's why I want to write to you.

Because, this whole dating and relationship

thing was never smooth for me. In fact, it was

very painful.

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Until I became High Value and decided

to change it around and I met the man of my

dreams.

And on the rare occasion that I look back

at who I was back then, I get a shock of "oh my

gosh was I like that!"

And I feel such a huge relief that I now

couldn't even TRY to feel that bad about

myself.

Now, I feel such a strong sense of

ownership of myself, after all the pain I went

through and the solid decisions

I made to change my life, that I feel

incredibly blessed.

And I would want no less for you.

So today I just wanted to share with you

how it was even possible to change to a High

Value mindset and not feel threatened by

other women.

But before I do, I must warm you:

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Rock-solid self esteem and confidence

take a hell of a lot of emotional labor. It's

constantly getting out of your own butt, being

totally honest with yourself, and choosing a

better life instead of holding on to your low

self esteem.

Because I'm sure you'd agree with me,

sometimes, it's much easier to just enjoy

having low self esteem than it is to become a

woman who is High Value and who sees

herself that way.

Having the boring old story of "I have low

self esteem" is far too comfortable and

tempting.

But it's also downright devastating for

you, your health, and for the happiness of

those people around you that you love.

So may I ask that you CONSIDER

choosing to be High Value, and sticking to that

as a new WAY OF LIFE?

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If you agree, and are willing, I want to

share with you how I went from being THAT

girl (above) to feeling (almost) invincible

when it comes to men, my love life, and my

relationship.

But what I wanted to tell you was this:

Those memories are painful. But what I

notice now is, there is no way I would ever feel

"less than" like I did back then. NO WAY.

I still have moments of insecurity, for

sure.

But I would never feel that constantly

overwhelmed by feelings of inadequacy like I

used to.

Don't get me wrong, I STILL get

overwhelmed with feelings of inadequacy' the

difference is: it doesn't last.

It lasts probably a FRACTION of the time

it used to.

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So here's how you can start to get a rock

solid sense of self ownership.

Wouldn't it be nice to walk in to a room

and KNOW that you are JUST as worthy or

MORE worthy than everyone else?

It's not so you can be arrogant, it's so you

can have an unbreakable self esteem and

confidence that you are worth the best.

The only way to do it is this:

And I'm sorry, it's not a fancy answer,

it's a boring and uninteresting answer.

The only way to do it is to find something

OUTSIDE of yourself.

Why? Because human beings will do far

more for the ones they love than they will

ever do for themselves.

See, feeling inadequate is like habitually

eating potato chips every day. It's addictive! It

feels good to feel inadequate because then you

never have to face your fears because you

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always have the tired old excuse of feeling

inadequate.

Long ago, when David and I first started

dating and I was a flaming selfish bitch, he

turned to me and said… "Do you love me

enough to love Yourself?"

And I was speechless. I wanted to yell

out and say “What the hell do you mean? I feel

INADEQUATE!"

But he wouldn't stand for it. He let me

learn on my own without feeding my selfish,

self involved mindset.

And shortly after, I realized that yes, I

really did love him enough to love myself.

In fact, it wasn't only him. It was my

Mom, too. It was my father. I knew my mother

and father had suffered long enough, seeing

me grow up having next to zero self esteem at

times.

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These three people DESERVE to receive

the energy of me loving myself and bringing to

them my passion, my compassion, my love

and my self respect.

Now, you may not have a boyfriend right

now, but that does not stop you.

I guarantee that there is SOMEONE in

your life whom you would get your head out of

your own butt for.

Maybe your mother, your father, your

daughter, your brother, or your

grandmother....You FUTURE daughter, even.

Find who that person is.

And ask yourself:

"Do I want to see this person suffer

through seeing me diminish myself?"

And you may not think this is relevant to

your dating life, but it is the most relevant

thing ever.

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Because, once you start getting out of

yourself, out of your own butt, you are

stepping out of your old shoes and the

QUALITY of Men you attract is totally

different, and men see that you have

impeccable self respect and that you own

yourself and the ground you walk upon.

AND! You get REALLY good at telling

the difference between a good man and a man

that's bad for you.

You are not a pushover, and you KNOW

your worth, because you know that life is not

all about yourself.

Life is the most miserable when we live it

only for ourselves.

Women are the MOST unattractive when

they live life for themselves, because that's

not what we're made for! We are made for far

more than that.

So, go and find that person today.

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And your energy will change.

Men will feel you as High Value when

they see you, look at you, listen to you talk,

and they will feel a PASSIONATE woman.

You will not longer have to feel like you

have to take CRUMBS or what is leftover of

the single male population.

Start today! Or don't.

Take care!

Renee.

-XxX-