Amanda Final

8/3/2019 Amanda Final

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For Heavens Sake, Get tothe Point!

BY: Amanda Hall

If an innocent, truly interested

reader picks up a book and wants to really

feel the story, is it more

effective writing if he reads,

The woman is an angel on

Earth, and God has only to open the

beautiful gates of heaven for her to enter

her worthy place in the everlasting

world, or The woman works tirelessly

for charity, contributing more than 20

hours every week at the Federation of the

Blind? No contest! While flowery

wording is often misguidedly chosen as a

writing style masquerading as effective, it

is really concise, direct writing with

optimal word choice that always better

conveys and captivates the reader.

Really, Less is More!

When it comes to writing, authors

lacking confidence, or just extremely

verbose, believe loading a sentence with a

lot of elaborate, descriptive words will

force the reader to feel the intended

emotion and be captivated; however,

using unnecessary, countless words in

general will mostly like confuse the reader

who has no hope of deciphering the point

the writer is trying to make, if there

actually is a point. Inexperienced writers

find it easier to exhaustibly describe

scenes or elaborate on feelings because it

is easier to fill up a page with words than

effectively and efficiently tell a story that,

in its telling, provides real experience to

the reader. According to Sherice Jacobs,

the education system today encourages

students to use creativity in their writing

to facilitate the expression of emotions.

Unfortunately this teaching style usually

leads to purple patches, otherwise

known as needless sections of flowery


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words that instead of captivating the

reader, draws him or her away from what

the writer is really trying to say. Most

people embark on reading for either work

or pleasure. When reading for pleasure,

the reader wants to be swept off his or her

feet with active text that allows ones own

imagination to fill in the blanks. Active,

exciting, effective story telling makes a

literary piece intriguing, whereas never

ending, over-inclusive storytelling leads to

disinterest, confusion and even coma-like

somnolence. Likewise, a reader tackling a

document for work, or a student

attempting an academic article with the

goal of the most expedient absorption of

content, does not want to waste any

time trying to glean importance out of a

piece dripping with inconsequential

verbiage and monotonous droning of

grandiose or trivial inclusions. In the

article Dos and Donts of Writing a

Compelling Opening Chapter, Idrees

Patel agrees, explaining

that tight writing is a

great way to keep the

reader engaged. Shorter

sentences make reading easier, because it

makes it more likely

the reader will be able

to remember what

was said.

The Fix

The fix to overloading a sentence

with a bunch of words is simplicity: keep

it short! Adding extra words in the hope

that a beautiful writing piece will grow is

a losing proposition, unless of course the

author is William Faulkner, an extremely

gifted master in writing long flowing

sentences. Unfortunately, in elementary

through high school, as well as on the

dreaded and college-determining

standardized tests such as the SAT, the use

of as many words as possible is

shamelessly encouraged by assigning


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papers with minimum word counts,

instead of papers geared to effectively and

consummately cover assigned points.

According to Jacobs, a reader wants to be

able to get straight to the point, so a writer

should limit taking short cuts, detours, or

becoming unnecessarily repetitive.

Effective word Choice

An unforgivable way to lose a readers

interest is through poor word choice.

Filling a sentence with a bunch of

adjectives to describe something is

monotonous and sometimes even

overwhelming to the reader. Good word

choice is like cooking: a chef doesnt want

to overpower the eater with a dizzying

array of spices because it makes the food

bitter, over stimulating the diners pallet.

On the other hand, if the cook does not

add enough spices, the meal is bland and

boring. Balance is the key and the same

principle applies to an inviting literary

work. Too many words can over stimulate

a readers brain; he or she simply cannot

process it, or may not have the energy or

motivation to try. Effective word choice

creates a nice flow, which resonates with

the reader and makes the story

delicious. In Element of Style,

William Strunk, Jr. concurs, explaining

that A sentence should contain

no unnecessary words, and a

paragraph no unnecessary

sentences.

The Fix

One valuable tool used to

attract and hold the readers attention is

the use of the strongest, most accurate

verb at every opportunity. For example,

the word finds is bland and not nearly

as dynamic and effective as explores. A

reader can visualize a character exploring

but is lulled to sleep picturing someone

finding something. Verbs, however, tend

to have a presence of their own and have


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to be treated with respect when writing; a

great verb can be ruined with a lack of

understanding by the writer. For example,

a sentence such as, The woman died a

horrific painful death, sounds idiotic and

unnecessary, whereas The woman died a

painful death, gets the point across

quickly and effectively.

Getting to the Point

Many an unsuspecting, aspiring

writer has been seduced by the promise of

flowery writing, which is both misguided

and tragic when attempted written pieces

become redundant, mind-numbing works

that serve to lull the reader into resigned

submission. In Writing Concise

Sentences, Gary Larson explains how

redundant phrases are bad habits just

waiting to take over a persons writing.

Larson asserts that this bad habit tends

to sprout from wordiness, a practice which

also results in a garden variety of

misinterpretations by the reader. As

previously stated, students are sometimes

encouraged to focus on writing a lot of

words because they are assigned a certain

length of paper, or that the piece needs to

be so many words. Teachers are

challenged to recognize the value of

writing 500 effective words instead of

1000 words chosen to take up assigned

space, and to encourage students to write

concise sentences that make sense, get to

the point, and are free of redundancy.

The Fix

Writers can avoid the pitfalls

accompanying flowery writing if they

crunch up their sentences. Sherice

Jacobs advises writers to read aloud a

couple of sentences and, if out of breath

due to the outrageous length, try making it

more digestible for the reader by

eliminating extra words. Teachers can

likewise motivate their students to

produce powerful, charismatic writing by


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challenging them to write a consummate

piece that meets their own satisfaction.

Conclusion

The misguided promise that

flowery writing is effective will

unfortunately continue to influence the

novice writer trying to impress

unsuspecting readers everywhere, but it

by no means has to become a death

sentence to once-promising literary works.

If writers commit to concise writing they

will prove that less is really more and will

be victorious in the eyes of the reader.

Finally, writers cant forget the main

ingredient

for good

writing:

good word

choice. Mastering the arts of balance and

effective word choice are the keys to

memorable writing, mesmerizing lucky

readers and guaranteeing their overall

satisfaction.


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Work Citied

"Does Your Writing Suffer from Purple

Overload?." Ed. Sherice Jacobs.

N.p., n.d. Web. 14 Jan. 2012.

Hynes, Tom. "Saying It Short: 'A Less Is

More' Guide to Effective Writing ."

PR Newswire. N.p., Apr. 2011.

Web. 14 Jan. 2012.

"Sticks and Stones ." N.p., n.d. Web. 14

Jan. 2012. .

"Writing Concise Sentences ." The Guide

to Grammar and Writing , n.d.

Web. 14 Jan. 2012.

.
http://bulwer-lytton.com/sticks.htmhttp://bulwer-lytton.com/sticks.htmhttp://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/concise.htmhttp://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/concise.htmhttp://www.calvin.edu/library/knightcite/index.php#http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/concise.htmhttp://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/concise.htmhttp://bulwer-lytton.com/sticks.htmhttp://bulwer-lytton.com/sticks.htm


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