Ma. Jessica L. Diezmo IV – BS Psychology

Dear HeartTree,

I am Shaila

Bhave, a Hindu

Canadian who loss a

husband and two

sons on a plane

crash. It has been

for months but I still

having trouble

recovering with my

loss. The community thought that I am a very strong

and a calm person in facing the tragedy of my

family but the truth is my strength is due from

taking valium prescription. There were times when I

had a vision of my husband telling me to finish what

we started and heard the voices of my family telling

me that my time has come and that I must be

brave. I really miss my family so much. Can you help

me deal with my grief?

Sincerely,

Sheila

Dear Shaila,

Reading your letter brought up memories of

grief when I lost my loved ones. I understand where

you coming from and I want you to know that we all

grieve in our own way. But you ask for my help and I

am more than willing to help in coping with your

grief. The first step is to feel you grief. I know you

misses them so much but for you to heal is by

admitting the depth of your extreme pain. Next is to

recognize your anger points and learn how to

resolve this destructive emotion. As you mention in

your letter, your community knew you for your

strength following the tragedy. Slowly discontinue

your prescription because you might not even

realize it but you are mad about your loss and you

should not always be calm and controlled with this

kind of feeling. Third release feelings of guilt and

remorse and learn to forgive yourself and others.

Furthermore don't grieve alone; find strength and

support from others. Lastly reach for help & hope

(from within & outside yourself). Remember your

Dear Heart

Ma. Jessica L. Diezmo IV – BS Psychology

family’s vision and voices this allows you to move

forward in your life; go help others and think of

great things to look forward to.

Yours truly,

HeartTree