ADVANTAGES AND DISADVATNAGES - kaueli.kau.edu.sa/Files/126/Files/142237_Writing Pack 104.pdfNow, go back to the essay about “The Advantages and Disadvantages of Mobile Phones”

© 2014: English Language Institute – KAU 1

ADVANTAGES AND DISADVATNAGES

AN INTRODUCTION TO WRITING

ELI 104


English Language Institute King Abdul Aziz University Jeddah, Saudi Arabia Copyright 2014 English Language Institute, King Abdul Aziz Univers ity, Jeddah All rights reserved. No part of this booklet may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without the prior permission in writing of the copyright owner and the administration of English Language Institute at King Abdul Aziz University. Acknowledgement Senior Editors Simon Best Patrick Boylan Author Hafez Karout Editors Adil Abdul Rehman Anas Shaban Layout and Design Patrick Boylan


An Introduction to Writing Advantages and Disadvantages ELI 104

In this level, you will be able to: 1. Understand and articulate the purpose and organization of a discursive essay. 2. Generate and discuss ideas with others. 3. Understand how to build a good introductory paragraph to a discursive essay (general statement, opposing statement, your thesis statement) 4. Clearly express your topic and personal opinion in a thesis statement 5. Put body paragraphs in proper order 6. Write a topic sentence for each body paragraph 7. Find and correct common errors (capitalization, punctuation, spelling and fragments). 8. Link your major arguments correctly using linking words/ phrases that show the same line of thought. 9. Link body paragraphs correctly.

10. Explain some major arguments using examples, reasons or results.

11. Identify common mistakes in my own and others’ writing and correct them (paragraph organization, linking words and punctuation missing, minor supports missing, correct use of modals).

What contrasting issues do you discuss with your friends and classmates? Do you look at all sides of an issue before you take a position? Are you often able to convince others of your opinion?


In this level, you will write about a job you want to have. You will take the following steps to do it. Section 1: GETTING STARTED

A Understanding discursive: purpose and organization B Brainstorm advantages and disadvantages

Section 2: Preparing Your Writing

A Write your introduction B Ordering your body paragraphs C Write a conclusion D Put together the first draft

Section 3: Revising Your Writing

A Linking major arguments B Develop your major arguments with minor supports C Benefit from peer feedback D Make revision decisions E Write the second draft

Section 4: Editing Your Writing

A Check for modals B Check for linking words and phrases and punctuation C Benefit from peer feedback D Write the final draft


Section 1: Getting Started A Understanding discursive: purpose and organization Activity 1 Read the following essay and match the headings to the paragraphs.

Disadvantages of mobile phones Advantages of mobile phones An introduction A conclusion

1. _______________________________________ Mobile phones have transformed the lives of people in the last few years. They have changed the way we communicate with each other and they have brought many benefits in business, education and our personal lives. However, there can be several disadvantages to using mobile phones, related to health, productive use of time and social relationships. 2. _______________________________________ There are several advantages to using mobile phones. Firstly, mobile phones have made communication easy and cheap between friends, family and businesses. People can call or text or even video call each other at any time. This means that people can be in constant contact with their loved ones or with their co-workers. Secondly, mobile phones have many other uses such as browsing the internet, reading emails, playing games or shopping online. Finally, modern phones, like iPhones, have many useful apps for learning and entertainment. 3. _______________________________________ While these benefits are important, there are also important disadvantages. One is the health risk. For example, keeping a mobile phone next to your ear all the time can cause cancer and headaches. A second disadvantage is that many people spend too much time texting and chatting on their mobile phones, and this stops them from doing other useful activities like studying or reading. When people use their mobiles all the time, they waste a lot of time. What is more, using mobile phones too much can cause social problems. Clearly, using a mobile all the time stops you from interacting face-to-face with other people. 4. _______________________________________ To sum up, I think that mobile phones are useful. However, they can also cause a lot of problems, so we must not use them too much.


Activity 2 In small groups, read the text again and answer the following questions. 1. Which good sides of mobile phones are mentioned in the introduction? _____________________________________________________________________________ 2. Which word in the introduction means “But”? _____________________________________________________________________________ 3. What sides of life are badly affected by using mobile phones? _____________________________________________________________________________ 4. How have mobile phones made communication easy? _____________________________________________________________________________ 5. Mobile phones have many other uses. What are they? _____________________________________________________________________________ 6. According to the writer, how can mobile phones increase health risk? _____________________________________________________________________________ 7. What happens when people spend too much time texting and chatting? _____________________________________________________________________________ 8. What does the writer want his readers to do? _____________________________________________________________________________


Activity 3 You have just read a discursive essay about “The Advantages and Disadvantages of Mobile Phones”. Now, look at the meaning and organization of this essay. DISCURSIVE WRITING Discursive means to change direction of thought using logical argument*. Discursive writing often has the following features: • It is about two opposite sides • The structure of the essay is very important: The writer’s position is indirectly shown in the second body paragraph

*argument: evidence ORGANIZATION OF DISCURSIVE ESSAYS The organization of a discursive essay looks like this:

Introduction: It shows the problem and the writer’s personal opinion.

BODY PARAGRAPH 1: (the opposite side)

• other people’s views and beliefs • Supporting arguments • Examples/ explanation for some arguments

BODY PARAGRAPH 2: Writer’s side (My side)

• Supporting arguments • Examples/ explanation for some arguments

Conclusion: a decision or recommendation.


Practice 1 Now, go back to the essay about “The Advantages and Disadvantages of Mobile Phones”. Then, in small groups discuss answers to the following questions. 1. The thesis statement is the main sentence in the introduction. Find it and double underline it? 2. The essay has two body paragraphs. Underline the topic sentence of each body paragraph. 3. Circle the personal opinion in each topic sentence. 4. Now you can tell the topic of each body paragraph. Write out the sentences about the advantages and the disadvantages into the following table. Do NOT add explanation or examples.

Advantages Disadvantages

5. Does the write support the advantages or the disadvantages? _____________________________________________________________________________ 6. What is the function of the conclusion? Check (√) the correct answer(s).

It summarizes the arguments. It includes a decision or a recommendation to take action. It is a general comment on the topic.


B Brainstorm advantages and disadvantages Activity 1 Follow these steps to help you get ideas about your topic. Step 1 Choose one of the five topics you would like to write about for this course.

1. Studying abroad 2. Using the internet 3. Using Facebook/Twitter/Whatsapp/Skype 4. Living in a big City 5. Having a lot of money

Step 2 Find another student who chose the same topic and share ideas. Step 3 Brainstorm 3 advantages and 3 disadvantages and write them below. Choose the ones that you can explain or give examples for.

Advantages Disadvantages

Step 4 Share your ideas with other groups. Remember! Always add new ideas to your worksheet. Step 5 Decide which side you want to take in your essay – advantages or disadvantages.


Section 2: Preparing Your Writing A Write Your Introduction A GOOD INTRODUCTION An introduction has the following structure:

1. The first sentence is a general sentence about the issue, called the topic sentence.

2. The second sentence is about what the OTHER SIDE think of the issue. 3. The last sentence is YOUR thesis statement and it is about YOUR SIDE of

the issue. Tick the sentences that you think are correct information about a good introduction. A good introduction ...

is in the middle of the essay. is at the start of the essay. introduces ideas not covered in the essay. tells the reader what you will write about in the essay. gives examples to support your details. explains and gives small details. should make the reader interested in reading the essay. has a thesis statement (last sentence). has a general, interesting statement about the topic (first sentence). should have at least two sentences before the thesis statement.

THE THESIS STATEMENT A thesis statement must show:

A linking word: However,.../ While ...., / In fact, ... The topic: What you write about, e.g. Mobile phones, Living in Jeddah,... opinion: so many advantages, several advantages, a lot of ...

Example: [However] LINKING WORD,[going back to college]TOPIC has [several disadvantages] PERSONAL OPINION


Practice 1 Read the following introductions. In each of them, underline the topic sentence and circle the thesis statement. Mobile phones have transformed the lives of nearly everyone on the planet in the last few years. They have changed the way we communicate with each other and they have brought many benefits in business, education and our personal lives. However, there are several serious disadvantages to mobile phones, concerning health, social communication and technical issues. With the growth of the internet we can see different programs or films, and we can share comments, videos or photos with our friends or family. We have the possibility to do courses, or we can make an appointment to see the doctor. While we can buy almost everything online, the growth of online shopping has not really improved our life because the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. The future is a mystery to everyone. Some people say that the future is bright because modern technology will soon be able to solve all problems in our society. Other people think that modern technology makes it impossible to feel good about the future.


Practice 2 Write the following sentences in the correct order to make a good introduction. Many people think that there are many disadvantages in the area of online/distance learning. Online degree programs can help people who are constantly busy with family and work responsibilities but would still like to continue their education. In spite of these disadvantages, online degree programs are gradually earning respect and will continue to grow as a resource for those seeking an education.


Practice 3 Each thesis statement below is missing one part. Read the missing parts at the bottom of the page. Write the letter of the missing part in the space in the sentence to which it belongs. Thesis statements 1. ___ in the summertime can be a good thing and a bad thing, providing jobs for many people, but also causing traffic jams. 2. South Korea has some big companies that make good electronic items such as ___. 3. Many sports players, ____make a lot of money. 4. All countries should try ____ for everyone. 5. Going on a diet can be good sometimes, but it can also be ___. 6. However, high schools should help students find part-time jobs in their field of interests, ___. Missing parts a. like football players or tennis players b. to provide free education c. bad for your health d. Building new roads e. both to help them earn money and to gain work experience. f. mobile phones and TVs. Your turn Now write an introduction to your topic. Which side did you take after brainstorming? The advantages or the disadvantages? Remember to include Do you have?,,, Check (√) A general sentence at the beginning A linking word before the thesis statement A thesis statement (YOUR side of the argument)


Your Introduction


B Ordering Your Body Paragraphs ORDERING OF YOUR PARAGRAPHS � The introduction: Before writing an introduction, you need to decide which

SIDE to support; that is, � The OTHER side is the sentence before YOUR thesis statement. � YOUR SIDE is the final sentence in your introduction.

� Body paragraph A is about the arguments of the OTHER SIDE, clearly indicated with a topic sentence.

� Body paragraph B is about YOUR arguments. � The conclusion is a decision or a recommendation to the reader. Practice 1 In small groups, read the TWO following essays about the same topic, “Online Shopping: Pros and Cons.” They have different opinions on the issue of online shopping. Then, answer the following questions. (No need to read every word, your teacher will help you spot the answers.) 1. Double underline the thesis statement of each essay. Is it about advantages or disadvantages? Which side does the writer support in each essay? 2. Find the linking word in each thesis statement. Is the argument about the OTHER SIDE before the thesis statement? Topic 1: LINKING WORD: ________________________ Topic 2: LINKING WORD: ________________________ 3. Underline the topic sentence in each body paragraph of the two essays. Then, put the correct headings in the box (Body Paragraph A etc) in the correct places in the essays.


4. Which body paragraph is related to the thesis statement? Is it about the OTHER SIDE or the WRITER’S SIDE?

o Body Paragraph _____ is related to the thesis statement. It is about ________ ____________ .

5. In each Body Paragraph B, how many arguments support the topic sentence? o _____ arguments in Body Paragraph B, Topic 1. o _____ arguments in Body Paragraph B, Topic 2.

6. In each Body Paragraph B, Which argument is the strongest and the most important for the writer? The first or the last argument?

o _______________ argument.

7. Which linking words are used to show the writer’s strongest argument? ESSAY 1 Online Shopping: Pros and Cons The growth of online shopping has greatly improved life for the consumer. Many companies today offer their products online, so that customers can buy them from their own homes. Some people may be afraid of buying things online; however, others find it very convenient because it is fast and gives a variety of offers. There are several disadvantages to online shopping. First of all, it can be quite risky. Another drawback to online shopping is that some products might not be as good as they appear to be on the screen. In addition, you may not be able to return the item or get a refund. On the other hand, there are many advantages to shopping online. The greatest benefit of online shopping is that it brings a lot of different products to us in a single click and we do not even have to leave our home. What is more, online shopping is a very quick way to buy whatever we want from all over the world. In my view, online shopping has many advantages and a few disadvantages. On the whole, I believe that if you are careful and use services like PayPal, you will be safe from getting cheated.


ESSAY 2 Online Shopping: Pros and Cons The growth of online shopping has greatly improved life for the consumer. Today, it is popular to shop online because it is quick and easy. However, there are also several disadvantages to online shopping because it is better to shop in a real store than to shop online. Online shopping has many advantages. First of all, we can find a great variety of products and we can find products that are not available in our city or country. Secondly, online shopping allows us to buy things whenever we want, 24 hours a day. Finally, many people shop on websites like e-bay, where they can find second hand products that are cheaper than products in regular shops. On the other hand, there are some disadvantages to online shopping. One disadvantage is that it is not possible to physically check the items you are buying. Also, it can be difficult to return or exchange what you have bought. Most importantly, we do not always know if the website where we make purchases with our credit card is safe and secure. To sum up, although shopping online is an easy, cheap and useful way of shopping, we have to be careful to use only safe and secure websites. On balance, I believe that while shopping online is a good way to shop, but if you have the opportunity to buy it in the shop, it is better because you can try on what you want to buy. That way, you are sure to get what you really want.


Your turn Now write your body paragraphs A and B. Make sure that you do the following: (√) Look at the Brainstorming Sheet. Make a final decision on the order of the arguments in body paragraph B

Body Paragraph A is about the OTHER SIDE’s arguments. Body paragraph B is about YOUR SIDE. Body paragraph B is related to YOUR thesis statement (your opinion).

Body paragraph A has a clear topic sentence. Body paragraph B has a clear topic sentence. You can use this chart to help you. OUTLINE

TH

E O

TH

ER

SID

E

Conclusion : Restatement of your thesis or a recommendation

support 3:

support 2:

support 1:

Topic Sentence 1:

support 2:

support 3:

support 1:

MY

SID

E

Topic Sentence 1:

Thesis Statement about MY SIDE

A statement related to the OTHER SIDE


Your Body Paragraphs


C Write a Conclusion THE CONCLUSION The conclusion usually:

• Reminds the reader what you wrote about in the essay (a restatement), and/ or

• Recommend an action to be taken (a recommendation).

Practice 1 Read the following conclusions and find if a conclusion is a restatement, a recommendation, or both. To sum up, I think that mobile phones are useful. However, they can also cause a lot of problems, so we must not use them too much.

A restatement A recommendation Both To sum up, although shopping online is an easy, cheap and useful way of shopping, we have to be careful to use only safe and secure websites. On balance, I believe that while shopping online is a good way to shop, but if you have the opportunity to buy it in the shop, it is better because you can try on what you want to buy. That way, you are sure to get what you really want.

A restatement A recommendation Both I n my view, online shopping has many advantages and a few disadvantages. On the whole, I believe that if you are careful and use services like PayPal, you will be safe from getting cheated.

A restatement A recommendation Both


In my opinion, therefore, cars have more advantages than disadvantages. The disadvantages of cars are serious, but with better cars in the future, these problems will become smaller and we will be able to continue enjoying the freedom cars give us.

A restatement A recommendation Both To sum up, I agree that eating out can lead to eating too much fast food. However, in general there are more advantages than disadvantages to going to restaurants. Just be careful what you choose!

A restatement A recommendation Both So you can see there are many reasons to visit this restaurant. Food, price, location – there is not a single disadvantage with going there. Try it for yourself!

A restatement A recommendation Both Your turn Write a conclusion for your discursive essay. What type of conclusion is it—a restatement, a recommendation, or both? Your Conclusion


D Put Together the First Draft As you have worked your way through section II, you have written all the pieces that you need for your discursive essay:

o The introduction ( including general statement and YOUR thesis statement) o Body Paragraph A (Topic Sentence about the OTHER SIDE & major

arguments) o Body Paragraph B (Topic sentence about YOUR SIDE & major arguments) o The conclusion

Put these pieces together to create the first draft of your essay. Then add a title. Please, refer to your Writing Composition Booklet.


Section 3: Revising Your Writing A Linking major arguments

LINKING MAJOR ARGUMENTS It is very important to link your major arguments very well because you need to lead your readers by the hand and show them your line of thought. � For body paragraph A, you can use the following linking words and

phrases: o Firstly, ...>> Secondly,... >> (Thirdly,) >> ... Finally,... o First of all,>>Another (dis)advantage.../Also/furthermore/In

addition,>> Finally,

� For Body paragraph B, you can use the following connectors: o One (dis)advantage of...is that ...>> Also,... >> Most importantly,... o One is... > Another (dis)advantage...> Above all, ...

Practice 1 A student wrote the following essay without linking the major arguments. Supply the missing linking words. Missing linking words a. On the other hand, b. Also, c. First of all, d. Above all, e. Another advantage f. To sum up, g. One advantage h. Finally, Body Paragraph A: Many people don’t like using mobile phones because of the disadvantages. ___they think there are a lot of health risks. ___if you use a mobile phone while driving you are more likely to get in an accident. ___some people simply feel using mobile phones too much is a waste of valuable time. Body Paragraph B: ___there are many important advantages to using mobile phones. ___is that mobile phones allow us to keep in touch with our family and friends. ___is that they allow us to have access to important information anywhere when we need it. ___smart phones have access to thousands of apps for entertainment and help you do just about anything.


Your Turn Look at your first draft. Add linking words to help your reader clearly follow your arguments. C Benefit from peer feedback PEER FEEDBACK When you have a classmate read your first draft, you can get useful feedback. You can find out what a reader thinks is unclear, poorly organized, or not well written. This will give ideas about how to improve your draft. Exchange drafts with a partner. Read your partner’s draft and check it using the Revision Checklist below. At this point, do not check grammar. Then give your partner feedback. Revision Checklist (√) / (X) Body Paragraph A is about the OTHER SIDE’s argument. Body Paragraph A is related to the sentence before the thesis statement.

Body paragraph A has a clear topic sentence. Body paragraph B has a clear topic sentence. Major arguments of Body Paragraph A are easy to follow and have linking words.

Major arguments of Body Paragraph B are easy to follow and have linking words.

D Make revision decisions Using the Revision Checklist, decide on the changes you want to make. Mark the changes in your first draft.


E Write the Second Draft Write the second draft of your composition, making changes and improvements. Use Your Turn, your partner’s ideas, and ideas from your teacher to write the second draft. You are ready to write your Second Draft. Please, refer to your Writing Composition Booklet


A Benefit from peer feedback Read your essay from start to finish. For each item in the table below, check to see if it is present and complete. Under the column that says “Me”: • Write “Y” in the box if it is present and completed. • Write “N” in the box if it is incomplete or needs improvement. •

When you are done, give it to another student in your class to check as well. They should put their feedback in the column that says, “Peer.” After they have completed and returned the checklist, turn it in to your teacher along with your essay.

Writing Checklist Me Peer The introduction paragraph introduces the issue/ problem, with a clear opinion.

Body paragraph 1 is the other side/opposite opinion Body paragraph 2 is my side/my opinion. The conclusion includes a restatement and reason for my opinion. Each body paragraph has a topic sentence. Each body paragraph has at least three major sentences that support the topic sentence.

Each body paragraph has appropriate linking words. • Linking major ideas: firstly> secondly>thirdly> finally

Correct spelling, full stops at the end of every sentence, and capitalization.

There is only one subject+ verb(s) in a sentence. • Incorrect: My relatives they eat and talk in a restaurant every

day. • Correct: My relatives eat and talk in a restaurant every day.


D Write the Final Draft Write your final draft, making the changes you have noted on your second draft from Your Turn and the Writing Checklist in Section III. Take all that you have learned and the feedback from your teacher and other students as well. You are ready to write your Final Draft. Please, refer to your Writing Composition Booklet

Documents

ADVANTAGES AND DISADVATNAGES - kaueli.kau.edu.sa/Files/126/Files/142237_Writing Pack 104.pdfNow, go back to the essay about “The Advantages and Disadvantages of Mobile Phones”