A Guide to helpGrandparents who have

a caring role

www.cfnf.org.uk

Produced by Community First New Forest

Contents

Introduction 2

Toys and play equipment 3 – 4

Computers 4

Schools 5

Benefits 5 – 7

Legal Arrangements 8 – 10

Making a will 10

Service and support groups 11

2

As a grandparent you are an important figurein your family’s life. You may be providingemotional support or practical advice, or youmay be actively involved in caring for yourgrandchildren. But this is not always easy andsometimes even with all your experience youneed help and support too.

This guide will help you find some of theanswers and the support you may need whilstcaring for your family.

Who can I talk to? Many grandparents find themselves raisingtheir grandchildren, often without knowingwhat help they can receive. Each situationis unique, with its own challenges.

You may feel “out of touch” when dealingwith everyday situations, such as goinginto your grandchild’s school, after schoolactivities and understanding what benefitsyou are entitled to.

Grandparents Guide “Are you a carer looking after your grandchildren?”

“Do you feel overwhelmed?”

“Do you want to talk to other grandparents in a similar position?”

“Loving grandparents can make all thedifference to family life. As the pace and pressure of daily life increases, the contribution grandparents make has never been more necessary”

(A quote from Denise Robertson from Good Morning)

The good thing is that you are not alone, asmany grandparents find themselves in yourposition. Here at Community First NewForest we have a Grandparents RaisingGrandchildren Support Group.

If you find yourselves back in a parentingrole looking after your grandchildren thenthis group could offer you the advice andsupport you are looking for.

Come along and chat over coffee, give eachother advice and encouragement at thisfriendly support group, refreshmentsprovided. Everyone is welcome, so if youwould like to come along, want moreinformation or would like to be added toour mailing list, please contact:

Project Co-ordinatorCommunity First New Forest Tel. 01425 482773 or email cypservices@cfnf.org.uk

Community First New ForestArchstone HousePullman Business ParkPullman Way Ringwood BH24 1HDTel. 01425 482773Fax. 01425 482666www.cfnf.org.uk

There are also many other support agencieswho can offer advice and a list is included inthis guide.

Just because you are looking after yourgrandchild, it does not mean you need to bestuck at home all day. If you have an underfive, there are playgroups and toddler groupsthat operate in church halls and communitycentres. Your local library, doctors surgeryand local primary school will have informationregarding activities available in your area.

Your grandchildren will have the opportunityto mix with other children of a similar age,and you will have the chance to meetother grandparents who may be in asimilar position.

Toys and play equipment It is easy to forget what your childrenneeded when they were young, and theneeds of your grandchildren can bechallenging. If you are unsure what kindof toys or equipment is appropriate thenParentline Plus offers parenting adviceon everything from toys and nutrition todiscipline. This is available to grandparentsas well as parents.

They are on the internet atwww.parentlineplus.org.uk

They also have a confidential email supportservice as well, manned by volunteers whotry to reply within three working days – orif your problem is more urgent, telephonetheir 24-hour helpline on 0808 800 2222.

Their postal address is:Parentline Plus520 Highgate Studios53-79 Highgate RoadKentish TownLondonNW5 1TL

Finding toys and equipment can be achallenge. Your local charity shops and carboot sales often have good quality playequipment at the fraction of the cost youwould pay in the shops. Young childrenusually don’t care where they come from,just as long as they can play and keep busy.

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There is a Toy Library at:Fordingbridge SandleheathSea Scout HallSandleheathFordingbridgeHantsSP6 3EETel: 01725 517379Email: jacquiingram@tiscali.co.uk

Everyone is welcome. Parents, grandparents,carers, childminders, playgroups, pre-schoolsetc.

They are open one day a month on aThursday, usually the first Thursday but thisdoes change occasionally, so please checkbefore your first visit.

Opening times are 10.30am – 4.30pm.They have a wide selection of toys to suitages 0-14.

Membership costs £5 per annum and monthlytoy hire starts at 50p. Most toys are pricedbetween 50p & £3.00. Games Consoles areslightly more expensive.

There is also “TEDS” based in Ringwoodwhich is a Toy Exchange and Donationscheme. The TEDS scheme provides aninnovative way of recycling and reusingchildren’s used and outgrown items that mayno longer be of use to you, but may be toothers. They recycle unwanted toys, books,puzzles, DVD's, bikes, trikes, scooters, ride-on toys, clothes, linens, nursery equipment,changing mats and tables, prams, buggies,travel systems, carry seats and more.

For more information go towww.tedstoysales.co.ukor contact them on 01425 489519or 07795 109559.

4

“You do not really understand something unless you can explain it to your grandmother.”

– Proverb

Computers

The use of a computer can fill you with fear;however there is help at hand. There areComputer Clubs available across the NewForest to help and guide you and below aresome contacts.

Age Concern Computer CentreSt John’s ChurchSt James RoadShirleySouthamptonSO15 5FBTel. 02380 368 636

Bringing IT learning to the over 50sAge Concern Hampshire1 St CrossWinchesterHampshireSO23 9JATel. 02392 591 578

Computer ClubsAge Concern New Forest EastSouthward House2 Beaulieu RoadDibden PurlieuHampshireSO45 4PTTel. 02380 841 199

SchoolsYou might also find going into yourgrandchildren’s school and talking to theSpecial Needs Co-ordinator (SENCO) helpful,as the school will often be able to offer extrasupport to you and your family. Some schoolsmay have an Emotional Literacy SupportAssistant (ELSA) or a Jigsaw Worker, whowill work with your grandchildren in schoolif they are experiencing difficulties andoffer you support. You may also be entitledto free school meals.

Your family may be experiencingbereavement, which is a difficult time.Here are two support agencies whom youcan contact for support and advice.

Cruse Bereavement – South HampshireTel. 023 8023 2500Email: southhants@cruse.org.uk

Simon SaysChild Bereavement SupportSimon SaysLink House113 Leigh RoadEastleighHampshireSO20 9DSTel. 02380647550Email: info@simonsays.org.uk

BenefitsDid you know…?

From April 2011 working grandparents whoprovide childcare for a child under 12 willbe able to have their National Insurancecontributions credited, to help build uptheir basic state pension.

Financial worries are always a major factorwhen looking after your family. Sometimesyou can become overwhelmed and unsurewhat you can claim for. Many grandparentsare and have been in the same positionas you. If you want to talk to others ina similar position to yourself come toCommunity First New Forest GrandparentsRaising Grandchildren Support Group.

Overleaf are a list of benefits andallowances you may be entitled to claim if you're raising your grandchildren, andcontact numbers.

5

“Perfect love sometimes does not comeuntil the first grandchild.”

– Welsh Proverb

Child benefit

Child benefit is a tax-free payment toanyone bringing up a child. You don’t haveto be the child’s parent to claim it, but youmust have responsibility for them.

The Child Benefit officeTel. 08453 021 444 or visit the websitewww.hmrc.gov.uk/childbenefit(textphone: 08453 021 474)

Child maintenance

If you're bringing up a child who has a parentor parents who are living somewhere else.www.direct.gov.uk

Child Support Agency (CSA)

Tel. 08457 133 133(textphone: 08457 138 924)– you can also request an application formfrom the CSA.

Disability living allowance (DLA)

You can claim DLA for a child with a severephysical or mental illness or disability if theyneed much more help or looking after thanother children of the same age.

Call the Benefit Enquiry Line on 0800 882 200(textphone 0800 243 355) and ask them tosend you a claim pack.

Early years' education

All three and four year olds in England areentitled to 12.5 hours of free early learningper week, for three terms each year, witha 'registered provider' such as a pre-school,child minder, nursery or playgroup. Somelarge employers provide registered earlyyears' education at the workplace.

Hampshire Childcare andFamily Information Team (Cfit)

Tel. 0845 603 5620Opening Hours:Monday to Friday 8:00am – 8:00pmSaturday 9:30am – 4:00pmEmail: childcare@hants.gov.uk

Guardian's allowance

The guardian's allowance is a tax-freepayment for people who are bringing upchildren whose parents have died. Incertain circumstances, you may qualify forguardian's allowance when only one parenthas died. You don't have to be the child'slegal guardian to get guardian's allowanceand it isn't affected by income or savings,but you must be receiving child benefit forthe child/young person.

Contact the Guardian’s Allowance Unit on0845 302 1464 or visit www.hmrc.gov.uk(textphone: 0845 302 1474)

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Other benefits if you're on a lowincome

If your income is below a certain level,you may be entitled to other benefits andservices, such as help with the costs ofprescriptions and free school meals. Youmay need to use the tax credits awardnotice as proof of your income for thesebenefits and services. For informationabout them, you'll need to contact theorganisations that provide them.

Payments and allowances fromlocal authorities

You may also be able to get extra moneyfrom your local authority to help you withthe costs of looking after a child. For helpand advice on claiming benefits contact:

The Child Benefit office Tel. 08453 021 444 or visit the websitewww.hmrc.gov.uk(textphone: 08453 021 474)

Pension credit

There are two different types of pensioncredit: guarantee credit for those aged 60or over and; savings credit for those aged 65or over. You may get the savings credit onits own or with the guarantee credit.

For the latest news and how to claim, ringfreephone 0800 99 1234(textphone 0800 169 0133).

Tax credits

There are two types of tax credits:

Child tax credit is a payment intended tosupport families with children. You can claimit if you, or your partner, are responsiblefor at least one child or young person whousually lives with you.

Working tax credit is a payment to top upthe earnings of low-paid working people(whether employed or self-employed),including those who don't have children.You usually need to be working a minimumof 30 hours a week if you're aged over 25,but only 16 hours a week if you're aged over50. Working tax credit contains severalelements, including additional amounts ifyou have a disability or childcare costs.The childcare element can help with up to80% of your childcare costs, to a maximumof £175 a week for one child or £300 a weekfor two or more children. The amount youget depends on your income.

Contact the Tax Credits helpline:0845 300 3900(textphone: 0845 300 3909 or 0845 607 6078)Or visit the websitewww.hmrc.gov.uk/taxcredits

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“A grandparent is old on the outsidebut young on the inside.”

– Author Unknown

“Grandparents are the footsteps to thefuture generations.”

– Author unknown

Kinship Care

Kinship care is an arrangement where achild who cannot be cared for by theirparents goes to live with a relative or afamily friend.

Social workers and fostering workersencourage kinship care because they believethat kinship care is better for some childrenthan being looked after by an unrelatedfoster carer. This is because it may beeasier for them to keep in touch with theirparents, friends and other family.

A kinship carer may apply to the court fora Residence Order, a Special GuardianshipOrder or an Adoption Order.

Alternatively, the kinship carer may ask tobe assessed as a long-term foster carer forthe child.

For further advice and help contactSue Veck from Kinship Care on01962 847173

Definition of a Residence Order

A Residence Order is a court order ‘settlingthe arrangements ... as to the person withwhom a child is to live.’ An order made inyour favour will mean that your grandchildwill live, or continue to live, with you.It will also give you parental responsibilityfor your grandchild as long as the ordercontinues. This means that you can takemost of the decisions that a parent can takeabout a child’s care and upbringing. However,no one who has a Residence Order may takethe child abroad for more than a month orchange the child’s surname unless everyonewith parental responsibility agrees in writingor the court gives permission. The ResidenceOrder will not affect your grandchild’s legalrelationship with his or her parents nor willit take away their parental responsibility.This means that you will share parentalresponsibility with the child’s mother andalso with his or her father if he has everbeen married to the mother or he hasacquired parental responsibility if theywere never married. Even though you haveparental responsibility, some decisions canstill be taken only by parents with parentalresponsibility. These include the right toagree or refuse to agree to an adoptionorder being made and the right to appointa guardian for the child.

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Legal arrangements

Residence Order Allowance

If the child you're raising is living with youunder a Residence Order, your local authoritycan pay you a Residence Order Allowance.Payment of this is discretionary, and whetheryou get it depends on an assessment of theneeds of both you and the child and on yourlocal authority’s policy. The local authorityis more likely to agree to pay an allowanceif you negotiate the payment prior toobtaining the Residence Order. You shouldensure that any financial agreement withyour local authority is made in writing. Itwill be reviewed annually, and you mustinform the authority of any changes inyour finances.

“Grandparents make the world ... a littlesofter, a little kinder, a little warmer.”

– Author unknown

Definition of a Special GuardianshipOrder

A special guardianship order is an orderappointing one or more individuals to be achild's 'special guardian'. It is a private laworder made under the Children Act 1989 andis intended for those children who cannotlive with their birth parents and who wouldbenefit from a legally secure placement.It is a more secure order than a ResidenceOrder because a parent cannot apply todischarge it unless they have the permissionof the court to do so. However it is lesssecure than an adoption order because itdoes not end the legal relationship betweenthe child and his/her birth parents.

Special guardianship allowance

If the child you're raising is living with youunder a special guardianship order, your localauthority can pay you a special guardianshipallowance. Payment is discretionary, and thelocal authority will carry out a means-testedassessment of your needs. If you've previouslybeen the child's foster carer, you should geta higher rate for the first two years.

Special guardianship is a hugely complexissue. The Grandparents' Association hasan easy-to-understand guide to help youmake decisions on what is best for yourgrandchildren and you. This is theirinternet address:www.grandparentsassociation.org.uk

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If you find yourself challenging decisionsabout discretionary payment what shouldyou do?

• Seek legal advice. Search theGrandparents’ Association's lawyer’s listto find a lawyer close to you. The list ismade up of firms – from the Law Society'sChildren Panel and the Family Panel lists– that have the necessary expertise todeal with cases involving children,grandparents or other family memberswho may consult them. This is theirinternet address:www.grandparentsassociation.org.uk

• Contact the Family Rights Group’sAdvice Service:freephone 0808 801 0366(Mon–Fri 10am–3.30pm) for advice forparents of children who are involvedwith or need social care services.

Making a will

Why it’s important to make a will

A will sets out who is to benefit from yourproperty and possessions (your estate) afteryour death.

Preparing your willAlthough it is possible to write a will byyourself, it is advisable to use a solicitor asthere are various legal formalities you needto follow to make sure that your will is valid.You may also need legal advice for morecomplicated matters. A solicitor can alsoadvise you about how Inheritance Taxaffects you.

A solicitor may be able to visit you in yourown home, care home or hospital.

The cost of writing a will can vary betweensolicitors and will depend on how complicatedyour affairs may be and the experience ofthe solicitor.

As well as solicitors, voluntary organisationssuch as Citizens Advice Bureau and Age UKcan also help with your will.

Citizens Advice BureauThe Citizens Advice Bureau (CAB) servicehelps people resolve their legal, moneyand other problems by providing free,independent and confidential advice.

Tel. 08444 111 444or check your local bureau's contact detailsvia the website www.adviceguide.org.uk

Age Concern HampshireLocal Service Tel. 01962 8685451 St Cross RoadWinchester, SO23 9JA www.ageconcernhampshire.org.uk

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Below is a list of organisations andwebsites which you may find helpful

Grandparents First is Grandparents Plus’newsletter for grandparents who are raisingtheir grandchildren. It includes grandparents’own stories and also has news, help adviceand fun. For further information pleaseemail info@grandparentsplus.org.uk

Advice and Support GroupsBeGrand.net provides information, adviceand a welcoming community forgrandparents.www.begrand.netTel. 0845 4346835

Grandparents Plusis the national charity that champions thevital role of grandparents and the widerfamily in children’s lives – especially whenthey take on the caring role in difficultfamily circumstances.www.grandparentsplus.org.ukTel. 0208 981 8001

Grandparents’ Associationis a national charity promoting the roleof grandparents. It’s a membershiporganisation, open to all, and provides a range of information on its website and through a helpline.www.grandparentsassociation.org.ukTel. 0845 4349585

ParentlinePlus Provides advice and support for anyonein a parenting role, including step-parentsand grandparents.Tel. 0808 8002 222(free and confidential 24 hours,7 days a week)www.parentlineplus.org.uk

Grannynet is a one-stop shop full ofinformation for grandmothers who like tobe in the know.www.grannynet.co.uk

HM Revenue & CustomsInformation about tax credits and eligibility.Tel. 0845 300 3900(8am to 8pm, 7 days a week)Textphone 0845 300 3909www.taxcredits.inlandrevenue.gov.uk

Hampshire Drug and Alcohol Action Team(DAAT)Hampshire DAATWellbeing & PartnershipsHampshire County CouncilElizabeth II Court Adult Services - 3rd Floor NorthWinchester, SO23 8UQ Tel. 01962 846629 or emailhampshiredaat@hants.gov.uk.

Or contact the Drugs helplineTel. 0800 776600 orAlcohol ConcernTel. 0800 9178282

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“Grandparents are a delightful blend of laughter, caring deeds, wonderfulstories and love.”

– Author unknown

www.cfnf.org.uk

This factsheet has been produced by Community First New Forest. The informationcontained in the factsheet has been researched and collated with the aim ofsupporting Grandparents as Carers. We would recommend that grandparents checkall information and, where appropriate, seek legal advice.

We have sought to provide accurate information and acknowledge that informationcan go out of date. We would recommend that as well as using the information inthis factsheet that you make contact with relevant support/advice services to ensureyou have access to the most up to date information and advice.

Community First New Forest is a registered charity and company limited by guarantee.

Registered Charity No. 1068964Registered Company No. 3483827