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15 Donts that Happy Couples FollowCOMMUNICATION (/COMMUNICATION)
RELATIONSHIPS (/COMMUNICATION/RELATIONSHIPS) BY DIVYA
SHARMA (/ARTICLES/AUTHOR/DIVYA-SHARMA) | 549 SHARES
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A happy relationship is a myth.Truth is that to keep the ball
running is
painstakingly tough.The facade behind the Facebook
posts,pictureuploads and
smiling faces is something no one else knows except the two
people involved in
the ongoing tussle. All couples go through some hair-ripping and
teeth clenching
moments, but there are some happy couples who focus on some
particular
Donts.
Yes you heard it right, Donts and not Dos.
These are some particular Donts that happy couples follow to
keep the spark
alive,each day.
1. They dont keep count.
SAVE POST
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(http://cdn-media-1.lifehack.org/wp-content/files/2014/07/Artcadia-Vic-Rich-
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Happy couples never keep count of their duties.They are
oblivious to their daily
chores yet they are not stickler for rules. The once in a while
slip ups are obvious
and the other person lets it off. If one is watching the sports
telecast, the other
quietly does the laundry even when its not her turn. Likewise,
if shes late from
work, she will be greeted by the warm smell of a freshly cooked
dinner.
2. They dont use the words I or Me.
Happy couples love to engage in talk that covers both of them.
When relating
their experiences to people about certain things, they use the
words We and
us rather I, me or myself.Their togetherness quotient is
reflected by the
sheer pride they have while discussing their collective
thoughts.There are
opinions that may differ at times,but then they learn to agree
to disagree and
enjoy the differences.
3. They dont sleep over it.
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(http://cdn-media-1.lifehack.org/wp-content/files/2014/07/fighting-couple-
600x399.jpg)
However small the issue at hand is, happy couples dont sleep
over their
fights.Rather than taking the problem to bed and prolonging it
till next
morning,they talk over it.Of course if one is angry they do need
a breathing time
to cool down and reflect on the harshness of their voices but
then they
eventually come around.
4. They dont count their chickens before they hatch.
(http://cdn-media-1.lifehack.org/wp-content/files/2014/07/Kim-and-Morgan-
Photo-Just-My-Type.jpg-600x411.jpg)
Happy couples dont expect all of their hopes to be
fulfilled.They realize that they
are in charge of their own happiness and not the other
person.The wife realizes
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that it is her dream to go backpacking for the holidays not her
husbands so she
saves up for it.The husband knows that he wants to see the Grand
Prix but
doesnt want to when his wife is expecting. They realize that
dreams are meant
to be there, some come true, others dont.
5. They dont think about the problem, they talk.
Lots of problems go unresolved when the couple keeps it
inside.Most of the
times the pent up is to avoid hurting the other person or to
over aggravate the
fight. Little do people realize that this results in tumultuous
outcomes. Happy
couples dont keep their hassles inside, they vent it out.Of
course the result
might not always be great and may hurt the other person, but for
the sake of a
fruitful relationship,its vital.
6. They dont argue, they discuss.
Fights are an inevitable part of a relationship and we know
that. If you are not
fighting there must be something wrong with the way you two
behave with each
other. Tiny differences are allowed for the loving make up
sessions that follow.
Happy couples have a trend of keeping it low when they fight,
instead of arguing
with each other, they reason and see the other side of the
story.Of course at
times its difficult to listen to the other persons outbursts but
they still do.
7. They dont make a mountain out of a molehill.
Happy couples stay away from the melodrama and underplay their
issues.They
learn eventually to avoid noticing the mistakes that their
partner has made and
focus on the positives sides.The wife ignores that her husband
missed helping
her with the laundry as he was talking with his friend over the
phone.The
husband eats the half baked cake anyways as he knows the wife
had too much
work on her hands.
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8. They dont cheat,they express honestly.
(http://cdn-media-1.lifehack.org/wp-content/files/2014/07/happy-couple-on-the-
beach-at-sunset-600x375.jpg)
Life is too short for lies especially with the person with whom
you are supposed
to grow old with. Sharing a roof, they are going to find out
about it
eventually.Happy couples keep the cheating stuff off the
table.They dont cheat
their partner in anything, may it involve a mere phone call or
planning for a trip.
Being blatant is way better than lying only to break your
promise at a later date.
At the unfortunate event of the marriage not going anywhere,
they tell their
partners up front rather than date another person
simultaneously.
9. They dont procrastinate.
They deal with things or chores before they get too ugly.
Whether it is about
doing the dishes, booking the movie tickets, planning for a trip
or discussing
about the expenses, they prefer to do it right away when the
thought is fresh in
their minds. Also delaying the tasks at hand might be offending
to the other
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their minds. Also delaying the tasks at hand might be offending
to the other
person.
10. They dont play the family card.
Happy couples have two simple rules concerning family. They dont
drag the
family into fights and they dont compare one another to their
family members.
Fights are concerning both and they remain confined within the
four walls of the
room. Happy couples families are blissfully unaware of the
problems. Neither do
they use statements like Why dont you cook the food the way my
mother
does?.
11. They dont use the self-pity trick.
Happy couples recognize that self pity and self loathing gets
you nowhere.
Instead you are despised by the other person.In the event of a
fight, happy
couples never say things like You are so cruel to me or What did
I do to
deserve this?. At times their emotions get the better of them,
but they still try to
keep it subtle by changing the topic or asking the other person
calmly what
made them react this way.
12. They dont cling on,they give space.
http://cdn-media-1.lifehack.org/wp-content/files/2014/07/Happy-Couple-in-Car-arms-raised-pink-600.jpg
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(http://cdn-media-1.lifehack.org/wp-content/files/2014/07/Happy-Couple-in-Car-
arms-raised-pink-600.jpg)
Happy couples love doing things together that they enjoy. But
they recognize
that they both need individual moments of glory, too. There are
some things that
you enjoy that they other person doesnt. Instead of clinging on
and coaxing the
other person to do what you want, you have to encourage your
partner to do
what they want.People in a happy relationship dont give up their
dreams, neither
do they let the other person forget theirs.
13. They dont always have their way.
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content/files/2014/07/talk_finances_600x4501.jpg)
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content/files/2014/07/talk_finances_600x4501.jpg)
Happy couples recognize that in relationships sometimes you need
to think
more about the other person than about yourself. They focus on
giving rather
than receiving. As a result the other person always feels
comforted that his or
her interests and thoughts matter.
14. They dont find life OK, they find it awesome.
Happy couples always have something to look forward to .Of
course life does
get monotonous at times but they pep it up with surprises,
vacations and friday
nights.When questioned by others how life in general is they
always say Its
Rocking.
15. They dont stop trying.
(http://cdn-media-1.lifehack.org/wp-content/files/2014/07/marriage-couple-
600.jpg)
Everyone goes through a rough patch but happy couples really
know how to pull
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it all together.Maybe they are having endless discussions
without reaching a
solution.Maybe they are not agreeing on the new school that
their daughter is
about to join. Or maybe their work lifes are driving them crazy.
But they never
stop trying to find compromises.
Lastly, happy couples are normal couples. They are not
celebrities whose
everyday life is a movie. Happy couples are the ones who survive
the tiring days,
the endless house work,the non stop cooking sessions, the hectic
weekdays and
the lazy weekends.While they are running to their workplaces,
doing the dishes,
vacuuming the house and refueling the car, they still find time
to celebrate their
love.
Featured photo credit: Happy Couple via i.huffpost.com
(http://i.huffpost.com/gen/1282096/thumbs/h-HAPPY-COUPLE-960x540.jpg)
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