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WELCOME BACK TO TDM FACILITATOR TRAINING

Preview of Day 2:

Role, Skills, Responsibilities of a TDM Facilitator

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THE ROLE OF THE FACILITATOR

• FOCUSES THE GROUP’S ENERGY ON A COMMON TASK– REACH A DECISION ABOUT A PLACEMENT ISSUE THAT

PROTECTS…PROVIDES SAFETY– LEAST RESTRICTIVE/INTRUSIVE MANNER POSSIBLE

• ASSURES THE PURPOSE OF THE MEETING IS UNDERSTOOD

• ASSISTS ALL PARTICIPANTS TO BE INVOLVED

• WITH THE SOCIAL WORKER, MOVES THE GROUP DISCUSSION TOWARD DETERMINING THE PLACEMENT/CUSTODY RECOMMENDATION FOR THE CHILD

• PROTECTS IDEAS AND INDIVIDUALS FROM ATTACK OR BEING IGNORED – PROVIDES A SAFE, SUPPORTIVE ENVIRONMENT TO PERMIT OPEN COMMUNCATION

• IS SENSITIVE AND RESPONSIVE TO NON-VERBAL CUES; MANAGES CONFLICT AND EMOTIONS

Handout 7-1

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THE TDM FACILITATOR…

• PERIODICALLY SUMMARIZES, CLARIFIES, REFRAMES AND INDENTIFIES AREAS OF AGREEMENT TO ASSIST THE GROUP

•IS AN INFORMATION RESOURCE FOR THE GROUP – KNOWLEDGEABLE OF LAWS; AGENCY POLICIES & PROCEDURES; SERVICES; BEST PRACTICE; AND MONITORS COMPLIANCE WITH STANDARDS

•MOVES THE GROUP THROUGH THE PROBLEM SOLVING AND DECISION MAKING PROCESS – MAINTAINING REASONABLE TIMEFRAMES

•MANAGES THE PROCESS AND STRUCTURE OF THE MEETING, RECOGNIZES THE FAMILY AND SW AS THE CONTENT EXPERTS

•IS RESPONSIBLE FOR HIGH QUALITY DECISIONS, INTERVENING WHEN NECESSARY AS AN EXPERIENCED AND KNOWLEDGEABLE PARTICIPANT

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THE TDM FACILITATOR…

• STRIVES TO DEVELOP CONSENSUS DRIVEN DECISIONS

• ACCURATELY RECORDS INFORMATION AND DECISIONS, PROVIDING A COPY OF THE SAFETY/ ACTION STEPS AT THE COMPLETION OF THE STAFFING TO ALL PARTICIPANTS

• MODELS SUPPORTIVE, NON-THREATENING, RESPECTFUL BEHAVIOR

• IS COMMITTED TO ENCOURAGING THE PROFESSIONAL DEVELOPMENT OF AGENCY STAFF

• WHEN STRENGTHS & GROWTH AREAS ARE OBSERVED WITH AGENCY PARTICIPANTS THEY SHARE THEIR PERCEPTIONS WITH WORKER & SUPERVISOR

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AS YOU READ THROUGH WHAT IS A TDM FACILITATOR (7-1),

CODE EACH ROLE WITH YOUR ANTICIPATED LEVEL OF EASE OR

DIFFICULTY:

•VC = Very Challenging

•SC = Somewhat Challenging

•NP = No Problem

•S = This is one of my Strengths

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A REALISTIC PREVIEW OF A TDM FACILITATOR POSITION

Handout 7-2

• Spokesperson • No Case Load

• Experienced & Skilled • The Power Of Group Process

• Demonstrate Values • Energizing/ Exhausting

• Manage Difficult Behaviors • Prepared & Focused

• Monitor & Coach Staff Punctual & Available To Cover Any & All Meetings

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Personal Awareness

It is essential that facilitators are aware of their impact on the group

Facilitators should be interested not interesting

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FACILITATOR LEADERSHIP

CHARACTERISTICSHandout 7-3

BELIEF IN GROUP PROCESS ABILITY TO MODEL – BE INVENTIVE & CREATIVE ABLE TO BE OPEN STAMINA TO STICK WITH THE GROUP ABLE TO COPE WITH ATTACKS ABLE TO LEAD W/O NEED TO BE FOCUS OF

ATTENTION SELF-AWARENESS CULTURAL RESPONSIVENESS

Activity

Rate yourself on a scale of 1 – 10

1 – Does Not Describe Me

10 – Describes Me Completely

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LOOK GOODFEEL CONFIDENT/ SIGNIFICANTBE LIKED…LOVEDBE RESPECTEDTO BE RIGHTRESCUE AND SAVEPRAISE AND RECOGNITIONPOWER AND CONTROL

FREQUENT NEEDS OF FACILITATORS

NOT GOOD, NOT BAD…UNLESS THEY DRAW FOCUS, GROWTH AND DEVELOPMENT FROM THE GROUP. Handout 7-4

EXERCISE

What Are The First Things That Come To Your MindAbout………?

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PERSONAL ASSESSMENT OF BEHAVIORS

Handout 8-1

Assess yourself for when the meeting is going well.

Repeat the assessment (using a different writing implement) for a meeting where you are feeling stressed/ the meeting is in crisis/ you’re feeling threatened / defensive.

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ACTIVITY!

Line up in alphabetical order by your favorite movie or the last

movie you saw

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SOME COMMUNICATION SKILLS FOR EFFECTIVE FACILITATION

Handout 8-2

• ACTIVE LISTENING• CLARIFYING• COLLABORATING• CONFRONTING• CREDITING• EMPATHIZING• ENCOURAGING• ESTABLISHING RAPPORT• HARMONIZING• INTERPRETING VERBAL

STATEMENTS• INTERPRETING NON-

VERBAL CUES• LINKING

• NEGOTIATING• PARAPHRAZING• REALITY TESTING• REFLECTING-MIRRORING• RELIEVING TENSION• SILENCE• STRENGTH-BASED

INTERVIEWING• SUMMARIZING• SUPPORTING

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AS YOU READ THROUGH SOME FACILITATION SKILLS (8-2),

CODE EACH ROLE WITH YOUR ANTICIPATED LEVEL OF EASE OR

DIFFICULTY:

• VC = Very Challenging

• SC = Somewhat Challenging

• NP = No Problem

• S = This is one of my Strengths

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REFRAMING / CLARIFYING / REFLECTINGHandout 8-3

• HE’LL NEVER DO THAT

• SHE CAN’T STAND ME

• HE NEVER DOES WHAT HE’S TOLD

• SHE NEVER LISTENS

• HE’S A DRUNK

• HE ALWAYS TALKS BACK

• I’M TIRED OF HER LYING TO ME

• I DON’T WANT TO LIVE WITH HER

• HE’S A LIAR

• I’M TIRED OF HIS ROTTEN ATTITUDE

• SHE FLIRTS WITH MY HUSBAND

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SO…SO…HOW DO WE STAY TRUE TO BEST HOW DO WE STAY TRUE TO BEST

PRACTICE FACILITATION SKILLS WHEN PRACTICE FACILITATION SKILLS WHEN THERE ARE CHALLENGING BEHAVIORS THERE ARE CHALLENGING BEHAVIORS PRESENTING IN THE TDM MEETING?PRESENTING IN THE TDM MEETING?

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HOW TO HANDLE EMOTION, DISAGREEMENT &

CONTROVERSYHandout 9-1

♥ ESTABLISH AND REFER TO GROUND RULES

♥ KEEP THE FOCUS ON THE GOAL: TO MAKE THE BEST POSSIBLE DECISION THAT PROTECTS THE CHILD(REN) WHILE BEING LEAST INTRUSIVE/ RESTRICTIVE

♥ LISTEN/ HEAR

♥ ACKNOWLEDGE THE EMOTION AND TRY TO UNDERSTAND

♥ EXPLAIN THE PURPOSE OF THE MEETING

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HOW TO HANDLE EMOTION, DISAGREEMENT &

CONTROVERSYHandout 9-1

♥ RECOGNIZE THE FAMILY’S EXPERTISE

♥ COMMUNICATE COOPERATIVE INTENTIONS

♥ CLARIFY AREAS OF DISAGREEMENT & DIFFERENCES

♥ IDENTIFY AREAS OF AGREEMENT

♥ ENCOURAGE THE PERSON TO DECRIBE THEIR EMOTION, IF THEY ARE ABLE

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HOW TO HANDLE EMOTION, DISAGREEMENT &

CONTROVERSYHandout 9-1

♥ ENCOURAGE UNDERSTANDING

♥ STAY FLEXIBLE AND ASSIST THE GROUP TO DO THE SAME

♥ PROVIDE TISSUES, WATER

♥ NEGOTIATE OVER ISSUES

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♥ INTERRUPT

♥ TAKE IT PERSONALLY

♥ BE CRITICAL OF THE PERSON; JUDGE, LABEL, ACCUSE, INSULT

♥ SEE IDEAS AND DECISIONS AS WIN/ LOSE

♥ ACT TOO QUICKLY

♥ GET TOO CONCERNED

DON’T

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WHAT CAN I DO WHEN… AN INDIVIDUAL IS EXHIBITING

DIFFICULT BEHAVIORHandout 9-2

When it is a staff member you

might want to approach the person in private, point out the problem, discuss and coach them in more desirable behavior. Approach as an ally, not as an authority.

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•Try not to judge the behavior as right or wrong

•Attempt to maintain the balance between protecting the group from the distracting behavior and protecting the individual from undue attack

•Accept the behavior. Describe it. Ask about it

•Legitimize their feelings, perceptions or rights

•Refer to the ground rules if needed.

•Allow the group to self-monitor, if able

WHAT TO DO WHEN AN INDIVIDUAL IS EXHIBITING DIFFICULT BEHAVIOR

Handout 9-2

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BE PREPARED FOR…AND OUR IDEAS ON HOW TO RESPOND

Handout 9-3

• Workers unprepared

• Disorganized, little or incorrect information

• Workers not coming with recommendation

• Staff not “owning” decision--- win-lose mentality

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• Challenges to you personally, usually from supervisors

• Conflicting information from agency staff and other professionals

• Behaviors from agency staff and other professionals that isn’t “professional”

BE PREPARED FOR…AND OUR

IDEAS ON HOW TO RESPOND Handout 9-3

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TDM IS A PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITYHandout 9-4

Believe in the group’s ability to be effective

Be respectful and demonstrate courteous behavior to all

Watch…Listen…Communicate…Recognize…Build…Support

Know your “hot buttons”

Stay open and flexible and creative

Maintain your energy throughout the meeting

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DO’s and DON’Ts:TDM & DV Handout 9-5

DO• Examine your personal feelings and awareness

about domestic violence • Recognize the reality of domestic violence in

many of the families we serve• Ensure you get formal DV training for self, and

advocate for all agency staff to receive• Identify behavioral (verbal and nonverbal) and

physical cues by meeting participants which could indicate domestic violence

• When possible, evaluate who will be present during the TDM meeting and determine your response in advance

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DO• Assess the safety of all participants

(especially the survivor) both during and after the TDM meeting

• Create a climate in which the survivor can speak

honestly and safely• Be alert and responsive to threats,

intimidation and anger from the batterer during meetings, however subtle

• Remember: the best way to keep children safe is to keep the non-offending parent safe

• Treat the identified person who batters as a parent and not as a person who batterers

• Know a range of options for managing the meeting,

i.e. breaking, separating, telephone conferencing, written communication etc.

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DO

• Be respectful, supportive and empowering of the adult survivor

• Dialogue around safety planning with adult survivor for self and children

• Assess and provide for concrete and immediate needs (e.g. rent, transportation)

• Consider all resources and be creative• Ensure planning holds the perpetrator

responsible and accountable• Develop collaboration with DV experts.

Inform DV advocates of the agency’s TDM process and ask for their assistance in training, attendance and identifying resources

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DO’s and DON’Ts TDM & DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

Handout 9-5

PLEASE DON’T• Allow blaming and/or

shaming• Believe the only way to

provide safety is to remove victims from the home

• Violate any protective/ court orders

• Have preconceived plans or decisions for DV situations

SUGGESTED FORMAT FOR

PRE- TDM MEETING DOMESTIC VIOLENCE CHECK IN

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HAVE A GOOD & RESTFUL EVENING

DAY 3 BEGINS AT 9AM SHARP

SEE YOU THEN