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SAFE Ambassador Program

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SAFE Ambassador Program

OCPS

Jody Bernier ~ Avalon MSCynthia Bocanegra ~ District SAFE

Amy Ellis ~ District SAFERick Frederick ~ District SAFEAdrienne Sears ~ Walker MS

Summer 2007

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RESPECTFUL

RELATED

CONFIDENTIALITY

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PERCEPTION

Your perception is how you view the world.

Everyone has a different perception.

Ten people may have ten different perceptions of one event…and that’s

okay!

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Active Listening

Verbal & Nonverbal

Body Language Eye Contact Facial

Expression Tone of Voice On/Off Topic

Things to Avoid

Crossing your Arms

Yawning Looking at the

Clock Rolling your

Eyes

TO LISTEN OBJECTIVELY WITHOUT INTERRUPTING

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Nonverbal communications is just as Important!

7% of communication is verbal.

38% of communication is how you say what you say.

55% of communication is nonverbal (body language).

Textin

g

Instant

Messaging

E-m

ail

Internet

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Communication Styles

Passive – submissive, not voicing concerns,

thoughts and feelings Assertive – clear, honest,

respectful

Aggressive – hurtful, using threats,

intimidation and anger

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Gossip & RumorsGossip: Based on facts To talk about other people’s business

Rumors: Unverified information; hearsay To talk to others about what may or

may not be true. Damaging to someone’s reputation &

malicious.

They are both HURTFUL and examples of POOR COMMUNICATION!!

Can you think of a personal experience that involved Rumors???

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Tattling vs Telling

Tattling is getting someone INTO trouble.

Telling is getting someone OUT OF trouble.

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CollusionCollusion is letting other

people assume that you think the

same as they do by not telling them

that you think differently. You may have a different point of view,

but to openly state these views

would be more difficult than “going along with the

crowd.”

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Silence Inappropriate

laughter Negative body

language Hurtful behaviorsCollusion is something that we’ve

all done at some point in time. Breaking the code of silence and the cycle of collusion starts with

SAFE Ambassadors!

Collusion contd…Collusion takes on many forms:

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Silence HurtsIn Germany they came first for the Communists, and

I didn’t speak upbecause I wasn’t a Communist.

Then They came for the Jews, andI didn’t speak up

because I wasn’t a Jew.

Then they came for the trade unionists, andI didn’t speak up

because I wasn’t a trade unionist.

Then they came for the Catholics, andI didn’t speak up

because I was a Protestant.

Then they came for me,and by that time

No one was left to speak up.

Martin Niemoeller (1892-1984)

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Diversity Is…

Being different from one another.

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What Do We Do About Diversity When We Really Don’t Get to Know One

Another ????

We……

Diversity Cont’d…

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Stereotype

Oversimplified belief or over generalization about a group of people.

Making assumptions about a person based on what they look like without

knowing them (i.e. categorizing).

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Prejudice is: ~ a negative feeling about a group based on stereotypes ~ a preconceived judgment or opinion~ an adverse opinion formed without grounds or before sufficient knowledge.

Discrimination is: ~ the unfair treatment of a person or a group based on prejudice.

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…..isms

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1. Toleratingto put up withsomething orsomeone.

2. Accepting to receive

willingly, but not

necessarily agreeing with it.

3. Respecting to consider worthy of high regard or esteem; toshow consideration.

4. Welcoming to greet hospitably and with courtesy or cordiality.

Stages of Acceptance Defined…

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Welcoming

Respecting

accepting

tolerating

Stages of Acceptance

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Violence…is the threat of or actual use of

physical forceagainst self or others. There were 14, 504 deaths by

homicide 1 in every 36 min.

There were 31, 655 deaths by suicide

1 every 17 min.

There were 95, 136 raped women 1 every 5 min.

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Orange County Statistics for 2006

County Level Student Behavior Stats 2006

6th-8th 9th-12th Alcohol 19.0 %

41.8 % Binge Drinking 8.4 %

23.0 % Marijuana 5.2 %

16.0 %

Attacking Someone with Intent to Harm

6th-8th 9th-12th 16.3 % 16.0 %

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Risk Factors for Violence

Poverty Family Violence Media Violence Violence in Video

Games Availability of

Weapons Drug Abuse Gang Membership

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A bystander is a person who witnesses an act or

an event without participating in it.

Bystanders are the majority and they have the

power to make a difference…,when they choose

to do so!

Bystanders feel… 1. Fearful 2. Powerless to change the

situation 3. Guilty.

Bystander Behavior

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The Murder of “Kitty” Genovese

At approximately 3:20 on the morning of

March 13, 1964, twenty-eight-year-old Ms. Catherine (Kitty) Genovese was

returning to her home in a nice middle-class area of Queens, New York, from her job as a bar manager. She parked her red Fiat in a nearby parking lot, turned-off the lights and started the walk to her second floor apartment some 35 yards away. She got as far as a streetlight when a man grabbed her.

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She screamed. Lights went on in the 10-floor apartment building nearby. She yelled, “Oh, my God, he stabbed me! Please help me!” Windows opened in the apartment building and a man’s voice shouted, “Let that girl alone.” The attacker looked up, shrugged and walked-off down the street. Ms Genovese struggled to get to her feet. Lights went back off in the apartments. The attacker came back and stabbed her again. She again cried out, “I’m dying! I’m dying!” And again the lights came on and windows opened in many of the nearby apartments. The assailant again left and got into his car and drove away.

The Murder of “Kitty” Genovese

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Ms Genovese staggered to her feet as a city bus drove by. It was now 3:35 a.m. The attacker returned once again. He found her in a doorwayat the foot of the stairs and he stabbed her a third time--this time with a fatal consequence. It was3:50 when the police received the first call. They responded quickly and within two minutes were at the scene. Ms Genovese was already dead. The only person to call, a neighbor of Ms. Genovese, revealed that he had phoned only after much thought and an earlier phone call to a friend.

The Murder of “Kitty” Genovese

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He said, “I didn’t want to get involved.” Two social psychologists, Bibb Latané and John Darley, unsatisfied with the above explanations, began a series of research studies to identify the situational factors that influence why people may be reluctant to come to the aid of others. Their explanation has been called diffusion of responsibility or the bystander effect and holds that an individual is less likely to provide assistance as the number of bystanders increases.

The Murder of “Kitty” Genovese

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Your Role as a Bystander…

If you find yourself in a bystander situation…what will you choose to do???

Friends & acquaintances often put pressure on people to fight. These same people can play a role in preventing fights to resolve conflict by…

1. Ignoring those people who make negative remarks

about other people;

2. Refusing to spread rumors;

3. Refusing to spread a threat, insult or rumor from one

person to another;

4. Staying away from any area where you expect a fight

could take place;

If you find yourself in a bystander situation…what will you choose to do???

Friends & acquaintances often put pressure on people to fight. These same people can play a role in preventing fights to resolve conflict by…

1. Ignoring those people who make negative remarks

about other people;

2. Refusing to spread rumors;

3. Refusing to spread a threat, insult or rumor from one

person to another;

4. Staying away from any area where you expect a fight

could take place;

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How one feels by putting

Oneself in another person’s shoes.

Empathy

AllySomeone that can be counted on in times of need.

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Harassment…

is any unwanted remarks or

actions that cause a

person emotional or

physical harm.

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Forms of Sexual Harassment may include (but are not

limited to):

1. Making comments about a person’s body part 2. Touching inappropriately 3. Spreading rumors about a person’s body part. 4. School Games 5. Flirting vs. Sexual Harassment

Sexual Harassment…is any uninvited sexual remarks or

sexual advances.

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What should you do about Sexual Harassment?

Speak up assertively when you feel disrespected.

Use your refusal skills to reject unwanted sexual

advances. Avoid having to be alone with

someone you don’t trust. Report behavior that you may think

is sexual harassment.

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What is Bullying?

A student is being bullied when he or she is exposed, repeatedly and over time, to negative actions on the part of one or more students.

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Bullying is…Longstanding violence

Imbalance of power

The use of verbal or nonverbal

threats, physical force or

exclusion to intimidate and

control another person

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Physical

Verbal

Nonverbal

Cyber bulling

Hitting, kicking, shoving, spitting, getting someone to assault another person

Taunting, teasing, racial or ethnic slurs, sexual harassment, spreading rumors, telephone

Threats, obscene gestures, deliberate exclusion

Texting, e~mails, IM, websites, My Space

Types of Bullying

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Bullying Hurts EveryoneBullies :

learned their behavior

learned to feel good at

the expense of others

take out their frustrations

on others have high self-

esteem are more likely to

fail in school and become criminals.

Victims/Targets: are targets of

bullies have lower self-

esteem & more illnesses have higher

absenteeism are more likely to be depressed experience thoughts

of suicide.

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Provocative Victim:One who is a target of bullies and

often exhibit bullying behavior, has low self-esteem, has been victimized or is presently being victimized.Bystander:

One who observers bullying; may feel

helpless or afraid and have feelings of guilt,

fear & shame by doing or saying nothing.

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Be an ally Tell an adult Say something Distract Pull the victim away from

the situation

Strategies to Stop Bullying…

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Reporting

I Promise to Notice:

Acts of Bullying Violence Harassment Threats &

hurtful behavior

I promise to report & act on

behaviors considered to be

Red Flags to:

SAFE Coordinators Administrators Teachers Guidance Parent

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You have the POWER to STOP and PREVENT unwanted acts and to

make your campus a Safer Place.

If you do NOTHING you are saying that what is happening is OK with

you!!!

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Talk of Suicide Knowledge of Homicide

attempt Physical Fighting Weapons Knowledge or

witnessing drug deal Alcohol or Drugs on

Campus Rape Under the Influence

School Hotline

Signs to Look for…

Gang Activity Potential Violence Threats Family physical or

Sexual Abuse Cutting/Self Injurious Behavior Acts of Retaliation Relationship Violence Drag Racing

RED FLAGS

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Face: ones public self image.

Losing Face: To lose dignity; embarassment.

Saving Face: To regain ones dignity & control.

Graceful Exits

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One more time Slowly Last Word Laugh Lie

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Affirmations

Plate Activity

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What do you plan to do to make a difference at your school and in

your community?

Personal Action

Plan

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Alcohol, Tobacco and Other Drugs

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Thank you for choosing to be

aSAFE

Ambassador!

Acknowledgments

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