1

Interpersonal Interpersonal RelationshipsRelationships

Scientists believe that ALL relationships – both impersonal and personal – are based on the social exchange theory.◦ We seek out people who can give us rewards

(tangible or intangible) that are greater than or equal to the costs we encounter in dealing with them

Rewards – Cost = Outcome

2

Acquaintances – goal is to reduce uncertainty and maintain face

Friends – we voluntarily become more personal

Close friends / Intimates – few people we share trust with high degree of commitment, disclosure, and interdependence

3

Interpersonal communication occurs when people treat one another as unique individuals, regardless of the context in which the interaction occurs or the number of people involved.

4

Metacommunication is communication about communication◦ Essential ingredient in successful relationships◦ Tool for handling problems◦ Reinforces good aspects of a relationship

5

Physical Intellectual sharing Emotional Shared activities

6

Women are more likely to share thoughts and feelings

75% of men surveyed said most meaningful experiences w/ friends came from activities other than talking

7

Beginning relationships

Developing relationships

Maintaining relationships

Deteriorating and Dissolving

relationships

8

9

Mark Knapp’s Stages of the Relationship

Initiating – brief interactions to show interest

Experimenting – small talk Intensifying – expression of feelings (WE) Integrating – take identity as one social unit Bonding – make symbolic public gestures

10

Differentiating – need to gain privacy Circumscribing – withdrawal, shrinking of

interest Stagnating – no growth occurs Avoiding – physical distance occurs Terminating – relationship ends

11

Autonomy vs. Connection Openness vs. Closedness (privacy) Novelty vs. Predictability

12

Self-disclosure is the process of deliberately

revealing information about oneself that is significant

and that would not normally be known by others.

Disclosure is revealing confidential or secret

information. Disclosure is a larger concept because it

includes confidential information about others as well

as yourself (Petronio, 2002 & pg 161)

13

14

15

(Pg 164)

Intimacy – Because of Dialectical tensions, people more back and forth between greater disclosure and privacy. Disclosure can increase and decrease intimacy.

Reciprocity – how long do you wait before you reciprocate disclosure

Trust – How does your partner treat information you shared

16

Self-disclose information you want others to disclose to you

Continue self-disclosure when reciprocated Gradually move to deeper levels of self-

disclosure Observe the risk involved in self-disclosing

17

Formal Cultures Engage in Less Self-Disclosure

Germany More Formal than America Misperceptions in Early Stages of

Cross-Cultural Relationships Across Cultures - More Intimacy, More

Self-Disclosure

18

In General, Men Tend to Disclose Less Than Women, but This Varies by Individual and Cultural Tradition

Men in our society are more likely to

view conversation as report-talk

Women in our society are more likely

to view conversation as rapport-talk Tannen,

1990

19