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US ARMY COMMAND AND GENERAL STAFF COLLEGE

International Military Student Preparatory Course

Lesson Plan for Lesson P910

English Writing

Course Author: Mr. Mike Brettmann

Lesson Author: Mr. Le Denniston

Date prepared: 31 Mar 2005

1. SCOPE

This lesson is to help students understand how to write an effective English essay. It supports the

numerous writing requirements they will encounter in CGSC. Since many students are non-English

speakers in their native languages, this lesson provides a foundation level of knowledge to aid them in

successfully dealing with those requirements.

This lesson emphasizes one field grade leader competency map (FGLM) skill by challenging studentsto improve their ability to communicate clearly (5.1). During the essay writing phase of this lesson,

they will be challenged to demonstrate a specific leader behavior that is indicative of exemplary field

grade officer skill. The behavior is: Assesses environment (people, events, and systems) then tailors

message to convince others to follow ideas and make a commitment (5.1.1).The behaviors identified

in the FGLM provide a common language and assist in the assessment of overall student performance

by providing performance indicators to differentiate between successful and exemplary performance.

2. LEARNING OBJECTIVES

TLO C.

Action: Apply CGSOC skills.

Condition: Individually or within a group; as an officer working on preparation of country andgovernment briefings; given concrete experiences, class discussions; reading assignments; timed

requirements, and references; and computer assisted instruction and research.

Standard: Application includes

1. Applying briefing techniques, IAW ST 22-2.

2. Individual/group research techniques.

3. Recording events, IAW ST 22-2.

4. Participating in class IAW staff group and lesson requirements.

5. Group development.

6. Applying Microsoft Office and CGSOC related internet computer skills.

7. Effective written communication.

8. Complying with laws/rules/regulations to include use of government assets.

9. Honorable representation of home country.Learning Level: Cognitive: Application

ELO C.07

Action: Write an effective essay.

Condition: As a CGSOC International Military Student and member of a staff group; given concreteexperiences, ST22-2; Writing Guides; and approved topic, and class discussion.

Standard: The Essay must include:

1.A clearly stated thesis.

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2.Clearly stated support and analysis.

3.Organization suitable for the topic.

4.Proper documentation of research.

5.Correct use of passive voice.

Learning Level: Cognitive: Application

JPME I Learning Areas Supported:None.

3. LEADER BEHAVIORS

5.1.1 Assesses environment (people, events, and systems) then tailors message to convince others to

follow ideas and make a commitment

4. ASSIGNED STUDENT READINGS

Advance Sheet

Scan: Chapter 2, ST 22-2; Appendix A, ST 22-2 (34 pages)

5. INSTRUCTOR ADDITIONAL READING(S)/MATERIAL:None.

6. TRAINING AIDS

Appendix A: Assessment Plan

Appendix B: Slides

Appendix C: Example Thesis Statement Handout

Appendix D: Example Citations Handout

Appendix E: Essay Writing Handout

Whiteboard

Screen and PC for PowerPoint presentation

Student laptops

Three butcher board easels per staff groupMarkers for use with the butcher boards

7. CONDUCT OF LESSON

a. Introduction: (5 minutes).

(1) Slide 1, Lesson Objective. The instructortells students that the combined lesson will extend

over two days, and will include an initial portion on how to write an English essay, followed by

some group practice, and an essay writing assignment on the second day. Make sure they

understand that the essay is graded on a pass-fail basis. Emphasize the importance of good

writing to success in CGSC. Refer the students back to their advance sheets for the standards that

will be applied to their writing. Make sure the students understand they must have their notebookcomputers in class for the second day.

Instructor Note: The class goals are to review basic academic writing procedures, and have students

demonstrate their writing ability for diagnostic purposes. Day one will be devoted to discussing how to

write an essay, and a group practice period during which students will go through some of the steps inactual writing. Students should NOT be told what topic they will be writing about on day two so that they

do not compose their essay at home overnight. The primary goal is good organization and clear

communication mechanics matter only when they interfere with communications. Because of time

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limitations, students whose essays are below standard will be given more help later rather than during

IMSPC.

b. Lesson Timeline:

Day One

5 minutes Introduction: Attention and Motivation.15 minutes Concrete Experience: Quick writing assignment.

10 minutes Publish and Process: Discussion of quick writing.

50 minutes Generalize New Information: Essay Writing.

10 minutes Break.

20 minutes Develop: Discussion on writing

120 minutes Apply: Group Practice (Allow breaks as necessary).

10 minutes Conclusion and assignment of homework

Day Two

240 minutes Apply: Write an essay.

(2) Slide 2, Job One.

c. Concrete Experience: (15 minutes). The instructor assigns the students the task of writing, in

English, a short description of how they felt about what they did in class yesterday. Tell them to

work individually, by hand on paper or using their laptops and be as clear as they can in

describing their activities in class on the previous day. Tell them not to be too worried aboutgrammar and spelling, but to think more about organizing their writing.

d. Publish and Process: (10 minutes). Discuss with the students how they went about meeting the

quick writing assignment. Dont focus on what the students actually wrote, but the process of

writing as they experienced it. Some suggested process questions are:

How hard was this for you?

What made the exercise difficult/easy?

How did you go about organizing to write?

What was the process you went through in writing this assignment?

How do you feel about having to write in English?

Do you think you can learn how to write, or is it just something some people know how to do?

e. Generalize New Information: (50 minutes).

(6) Slide 3, Why this process? CGSOC students will face a lot of writing assignments during

the course. This process will help them to learn to express themselves clearly in writing, and to

deal with CGSOC writing requirements. The process is intended to be recursive, meaning that a

writer can return to any part of the process at any time if he needs to. Each writer will need to

personalize the process for their own use and to deal with different types of writing requirements.

Students will have to prepare book reports, longer subject papers, quick article summaries and

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other compositions throughout their time at Ft. Leavenworth.

Instructor Note:Regarding plagiarism--the student needs to grasp with every assignment when he or she

must give his/her own view or summarize, paraphrase, or quote an authors view or a sources

information. The student must know how to clearly distinguish whose ideas he or she is presenting. Thisis a critical point. The students have read a sample essay that includes citationsyou could point out the

way that student writer used published sources. Students must understand that plagiarism is takenseriously and is considered a major academic offense. If they have any questions about how to use

materials from their research in a paper they should ask an instructor before turning the paper in.

Afterwards is too late.

(4) Slide 4, Class Time. Go over the two class days for this lesson, making sure the students

understand that on day one they will be learning a process and doing some practice, they will

have a small homework assignment overnight, and they will have an in-class writing assignment

on day two. They wont be given the exact subject they will write on until tomorrow, so there is

no point in trying to work on their essay tonight.

Today

Learn the process

Small group practice

Short homework assignment

Tomorrow

Composition during class

(5) Slide 5, What You Will Learn. Discuss the fact that writing is a process, and that if students

have a good process in mind when they write it makes writing easier and clearer. There is an

example format for essays that we will be going over later in class. It is a good basic pattern tofollow and should help not only in writing student essays tomorrow, but later in CGSOC as well.

There are some basic errors in writing structure that students should learn to avoid because they

get in the way of understanding. Tell them not to be so worried about them that they lose focus ontheir ideas, but keep them basically in mind. We will discuss them in more detail later.

Use a process for composing

Follow a format for essays

Avoid certain structure errors

(6) Slide 6, What is the Writing Process? Briefly go over each of the steps of the process,

letting students know each one will be covered in more detail later in the class. Emphasize that at

any point in the process a writer can go back one or more steps if they need to in order to make

their writing better and clearer. The best writers write, rewrite, rewrite and rewrite some more.

The first time through is always rough and needs revision.

Understand the assignment

Gather information

Generate ideas

Establish a purpose

Compose a thesis statement

Make a plan

Draft the composition

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Check and revise the composition

(7) Slide 7, What is My Assignment? This is the equivalent of clarifying a military missionstatement you have to understand clearly what you are to do before you can start to do it. The

basic questions on the slide should all be answered before writing starts. If the student has

questions, this step is when to ask them, not when writing has already started.

What is the subject?

How long should the paper be?

When is the paper due?

Do I have to do research?

Do I have to work alone or with others?

What format do I have to use?

(8) Slide 8, How Can I Find Relevant Information? There are multiple sources of information,

and many people who are ready to help find it. The librarians at CARL are very good sources and

they are there primarily to assist students. One thing for students to keep in mind, particularly

when finding information on the internet, is that they need to evaluate the source of data for itsquality, reliability and objectivity. Just because it is on someones web site doesnt necessarily

make it true. Information should be checked against more than one source.

The Library

Internet

Interviews

Personal experience

Newspapers

Magazines

Lectures

Discussions

(9) Slide 9, How Can I Get Ideas? Ideas come from multiple sources. One of the best

techniques is just to start thinking about a subject and let the ideas flow; this is often called

brainstorming. Students can brainstorm alone or in a group, writing things down as they come

to mind, free-write what ever concerning the subject comes into their heads, or do things in a

more organized fashion with lists or subject maps. In any case, students shouldnt initially restrict

their ideas. They can pare the list down later, but if they cut things off too early, they may miss a

really good idea that will help their writing.

Brainstorming

Free writing

Listing

Mapping

Drawing

Talking and listening

Journal writing

Instructor Note: Some of these techniques, particularly brainstorming and free-writing, are going to bevery unfamiliar and even uncomfortable for some students from cultures that do not encourage that type

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of unconstrained behavior. Make sure that all the students understand that at CGSOC there are no bad

ideas and they can all express themselves freely. Some students may still not wish to participate, and they

should be gently encouraged to do so without making it a major public issue.

(10) Slide 10, How Can I choose a Purpose? The central things for students to remember arethat the purpose has to match the assignment, and that it must be what they themselves want to

put across in their writing. They dont have to specifically express their purpose in so manywords, but need to keep it in mind as a focus for their writing.

Think about your assignment, your skills, your interests, and your knowledge.

Look for relationships among your ideas and information.

Ask Yourself:

What do I want to achieve?

What do I want to show?

(11) Slide 11, How Can I Write a Good Thesis Statement? The thesis statement is the central

idea you want to express in the essay. It needs to be short, and to have the basic characteristics

shown on the slide.

A thesis must be:

Clear a complete sentence

Specific not too general

Supportable with evidence

Strong not doubtful

Coherent does not mix different topics

Original includes the authors own idea

(12) Slide 12, How Can I Write a Good Thesis Statement?

What do you believe about the topic?

What is your original idea?

Are you well informed?

Can you support your view with evidence and logic?

Knowledge and Reflection = your own supportable view

Instructor Note:As with some other points in the lesson, some students may have a hard time with the

concept of expressing their own opinions and supporting them with evidence. They need to understand

that the CGSC expectation is that they will become informed on subjects they are writing on, and will

express their own views, supported by evidence, no matter what they perceive the official view to be.

(13) Slide 13, What Is Not a Good Thesis Sentence? When writing an essay, tell students toremember that they are expressing their ideas on a subject, supported by research, evidence, and

logical argument. Using any of these characteristics as a thesis dilutes the value of their work and

reduces the quality of their writing.

Avoid

Questions

Judgments

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Feelings

Facts

Other peoples views

Instructor Note:After the three thesis statement slides, hand out the Example Thesis Statement sheet andgive the students a few moments to read over it. Answer students questions. Tell them to keep the sheethandy as they go through the class to help them when they actually have to formulate a thesis statement.

Ensure they understand that they cannot simply use these thesis statements for their own papers, but must

do their own writing.

(14) Slide 14, What Is The Format of An Essay? This is the format of a basic essay, which is

usually a short paper on a single subject. However, most writing will follow basically the same

pattern. Experienced writers may choose to follow a different model, but this is a good starting

point. We will talk about each element of the essay separately.

An Introduction

A Body A Conclusion

(15) Slide 15, What Is An Introduction? The Introduction sets the stage for the rest of the

essay. It needs to get the readers attention, and let the reader know generally what will be said in

the body of the essay. A poor introduction may mean that the rest of the essay will be poorly

received, or not read at all.

The Beginning

Attention getting

Presents the thesis

Predicts the body

One paragraph

(16) Slide 16, What Is A Body? The body of the essay is the meat this is where the author

gets to make his case for his ideas. Present your ideas logically, each with evidence to supportwhat you think. Generally, it is best practice to start each paragraph with a sentence that presents

the main point of the paragraph, followed by the evidence and argument supporting the point.

Clarity and logical order are essential.

The middle

Several paragraphs, each with:

o Topic sentence (main idea of paragraph)

Supporting points (explain main idea) facts, examples, descriptions Explanation and proof of the thesis

Clear, thorough reasoning

Ideas in logical order

(17) Slide 17, What Is A Conclusion? The conclusion is you last chance to make your point to

the reader. It should clearly summarize the main ideas you want to get across, and provide a clear,

coherent ending to the essay. It shouldnt be a repeat of what you say in the body of the essay, but

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should make the reader remember the ideas you wrote about.

The Ending

One paragraph

Restate the thesis, or

Summarize the main points Concise, clear, reinforcement

Avoid anything new

Close smoothly, positively

Make the reader remember

(18) Slide 18, How Can I Organize My Ideas Into a Plan? One of the keys to good writing is

good organization, and good organization is based on finding the relationships between ideas wewant to express, and the information we have to support those ideas. There are a lot of different

relationships that we can use.

Identify relationships among your ideas and information:

General / Specific

Cause / Effect

Similarities / Differences

Categories / Classifications

Processes / Chronologies

Problems / Solutions

(19) Slide 19, How Can I Organize My Ideas Into a Plan? An outline is one of a writers

most important tools. It allows the author to organize his thinking and provides a layout that then

becomes the model for the actual writing. Writers can and should revise outlines as they work,

several times if necessary, to develop the best possible organization for their writing.

Rewrite your ideas in logical order make an outline

Introduction with thesis

Body

Main Point (general)

1. Supporting point (specific)

2. Supporting point (specific)

Main point, etc.

Conclusion

(20) Slide 20, How Can I Check My Outline? These are some questions a writer might ask

about his outline to help focus on the purpose of writing, and ensure that the outline is a qualityaid to the eventual product.

Do I have enough support?

Is my support balanced?

Does every point support my thesis?

Are my ideas in logical order?

Did I consider opposing views?

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Did I analyze the topic enough?

Does my reasoning and my evidence prove my point?

(21) Slide 21,How Do I Write a Good Draft? Remember that the draft is only the starting

point in the actual writing of your essay. Stay focused on what it is you want to accomplish asyou write. You may well make several drafts, revising and improving each time. Dont worry too

much about grammar and mechanics initially you can take care of those matters later in the

process.

Focus

Remember your purpose

Write your thesis statement at the top

Follow your outline

Compose your draft quickly do not worry about grammar, yet

Write the body first, then the introduction and conclusion

(22) Slide 22,How Do I Check and Revise? All good writers revise their work, often manytimes, before it is finished. If you can, once you have one good draft, walk away from your work

for awhile, then come back and read it with a fresh mind. Think about how it will read to

someone who has not been thinking about the subject as you have. Make sure your logic flows

clearly, and each of your ideas is supported. Once your ideas are right, work on grammar and

mechanics. Expect to rewrite your essay several times before it becomes a final product.

Sleep on it wait 24 hours if you can

Imagine you are the instructor then read your draft.

First, check for a clear thesis, good reasoning and support, logical order

Second, check for mechanics

Third, check for style Rewrite, rewrite, rewrite

(23) Slide 23,But English is Not My Native Language!!! CGSC does not expect linguistic

perfection. We know it can be hard to write well in a second language, but the process taught in

this class can help a lot. Write to communicate clearly, and worry about mechanics later. You

should learn to write on the computer as much as possible to save time retyping something you

have written on paper can waste effort. Never be afraid to ask for help, either from a classmate or

from an instructor the instructors are here to assist you if needed. However, remember that

CGSC wants your work, not someone elses, and you will benefit most from the work you do

yourself.

Avoid translating word for word Write the first draft quickly

Check mechanics later (spelling, grammar, vocabulary), then rewrite

Compose on the computer

Be concise, be direct

Perfection is NOT required

Ask for help, but DO YOUR OWN WORK

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Instructor Note: Some students are going to be intimidated by having to write in English, while others

will have few problems. Encourage students to help each other, and offer assistance as needed to those

who appear to be struggling with the language. In the case of a student who appears not to understand

what is going on because of language problems, notify the IMSD.

(24) Slide 24, Can I Really Be a Good Writer? Not every writer is going to win a Nobel Prize

for Literature, but almost every writer can learn to produce good, sound products. These are someof the things that most good writers do that help them to do good writing. Remember, the point of

writing is to get your ideas across to the reader, and these steps will help you to do that.

Good writers follow a good process

Good writers check and rewrite

Good writers imagine the readers point of view

Good writers think, think, think

Good writers use computers

Good writers avoid plagiarism

(25) Slide 25, The Ownership of Words and Ideas. In CGSOC, it is expected that every

writing assignment will be the students own work, clearly expressing his or her ideas. This does

not mean that you cannot use information or ideas from another source to support your work. It

does mean that if you do it, you must clearly identify where the ideas or words came from. That

can be by a footnote, mentioning the source in the body of the writing, or any other method that

ensures the reader knows the source. If you use someone elses words or ideas without giving

them credit, you are guilty of plagiarism. Plagiarism is a serious academic offense, and students

can be expelled from CGSOC for it.

Be careful

You can borrow but you cannot steal

Plagiarism is an academic crime theft of words or ideas Always identify the words or ideas of another person or source

Use correct citation formats

Instructor Note: At this point, hand out the example citation sheet. (Appendix D) for students to review.

They can use the sheet to assist them throughout their time in CGSOC. Tell the students to refer to the

Hogue book they received in their initial issue or to Kate Turabians A Manual for Writers if they have

questions. The CARL has multiple copies of Turabian, and it is available for purchase in the CGSC

bookstore.

(26) Slide 26, A Few Dos and Donts About Structure. These are some useful things to

remember when writing, but dont become too worried about them in the early stages

concentrate on your ideas in the drafting stages, then take care of structural problems as you

rewrite for the final product.

DO

Use transitions

Use active verbs

Dont

Use jargon

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Use very long sentences

Use many passive verbs

Instructor Note: You may need to explain terms used on this slide. Watch the student for indications of

understanding or confusion and expand your comments as necessary. You should also be aware that for

some students some of these rules (passive/active verbs, for example) may be different from how things

are done in their native languages, and they may struggle somewhat as they work in English.

(27) Slide 27, In Conclusion: The Process. Review the process, soliciting questions to be sure

students understand how writing should flow. They should understand that this general process

works for any type of writing assignment, not just the essay they will be writing for this class.

Understand the assignment

Gather information

Generate ideas

Establish a purpose

Compose a thesis statement

Make a plan Draft the composition

Check and revise the composition

(28) Slide 28, The Parts Of An Essay. Review the elements of an essay to reinforce what the

students have learned in the rest of the lesson.

The Introduction

Presents the thesis

Predicts the body

The Body

Supports the thesis with reasoning and information The Conclusion

Restates the thesis

(29) Slide 29, Any Questions?

Break: (10 minutes).

f. Develop: (20 minutes) The instructor conducts a discussion with students about writing inEnglish. The purpose of the discussion is to elicit student concerns, and to focus their attention on

the value of the process taught in the class. Some suggested questions are:

How can you use what you learned today to help you with writing assignments in CGSOC?

What one thing did you learn today that you will use when writing papers of any kind in the future?

What one thing that you learned today that you think you will be able to use when writing once you

return home?

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What did you find least useful in this lesson? Why?

g. Apply (120 minutes) Give a 10-minute break at an appropriate point in the class.

Instructor Note:Divide the staff group into three smaller groups, each with a butcher board and

markers.Assign one student to be the group leader for each group, and one to be the recorder. Tell the

groups that everyone must participate.

Tell the groups they have 10 minutes to generate as many ideas as they can about the topic ofleadership. They are to work as fast as they can, and write down all the ideas that group members

come up with.

At the end of 10 minutes, give the groups this purpose for writing What are the main characteristics of

good leadership? The groups then have another 10 minutes to generate more ideas. Again, they are to

write down all the ideas group members come up with.

At the end of 10 minutes, instruct the students they will have 10 minutes to develop a thesis statement

based on the ideas they have developed up to now.

Once all the groups have developed their thesis statement, give them 30 minutes to develop an outline for

a paper, derived from their ideas and using their thesis statements.

At the end of the 30 minutes, have each group show their thesis statements and outlines and explain them

to the other groups. Allow 5 to 10 minutes per group. Groups can ask questions of each other about how

they arrived at a particular thesis or how they organized their outline as they did. Dont let the discussion

move towards one group criticizing or attacking what another group has done. The object is to focus on

the process of writing, not the product at this stage.

Instructor Note: At this point, distribute the example essay handout. Give the students a few minutes to

review the handout, and then go over the parts of the handout in order. Ensure the students understand

where each part of the example fits in the essay writing process. Remind the students that they may NOTdirectly use any part of the example in their own writing, and that the actual subject for their essay will

not be assigned until tomorrow.

Day One Conclusion: (5 Minutes).

(30) Slide 30, Homework.

In your own opinion:

What is a good leader?

Describe a good leadergive examples.

How can I become a good leader?

Instructor Note:Explain that students will write answers to these questions at home in order to stimulate

thinking and to lead up to the essay-writing session tomorrow. This could be called journal writing, or

journaling. These answers will not be collected but must be brought back to class tomorrow. This is to

help students start generating ideas for their essays (although we do not want to fully reveal the actual

essay topic and assignment until tomorrow). Tell the students that the topic of the questionsleadership

is much too broad for a short essay, and they must NOT try to start their essay tonight. They will findout the final writing assignment tomorrow. They are encouraged to work with their bilingual dictionaries

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tonight to find English words related to their ideas on leadership. They may bring their dictionaries

tomorrow. They will need their laptop computers and some paper (if they want to do any prewriting by

hand) tomorrow.

Day Two

h. Apply: (240 minutes). Allow students to take breaks as needed.

(31) Slide 31, Essay Writing Assignment.

Write an essay no more than two pages in length.

You will have a total of four hours working time. When you have finished your essay,

turn in a printed copy to the instructor and email an electronic copy to the instructor.

Follow the format and instructions in the handout.

Instructor Note: Youhave two options for essay topics, and can assign either one to your students.

1. Who influenced my leadership style the most?

2. What I learned about leadership in my first assignment as an officer.

Pick a topic and write it on the whiteboard, announcing the topic to the class. Explain that students will

be writing an essay NOW in class on the announced subject, using their personal experience and

knowledge. They are to compose on the computer, although they may do some brainstorming or pre-

writing on paper. They are to use 12 point Times New Roman type and double spacing. They are to use 1-

inch side margins, 1 inch top margin and 1-inch bottom margin.

The essay is to be a maximum of 2 pages. They are to put their names on the top of each page. They are

to turn in a printed copy of their paper at the end of lab today and email a copy to the instructor. If they

finish early, ask them to offer to assist other students. Their papers will not be returned to them, but they

will receive feedback and a pass/fail grade. They are to save their essays on their computers.

Ensure that students understand that the purpose of this period is to actually write an essay. Remain in

the area and offer assistance as necessary. Students should take breaks as necessary. Be alert for

students who may be struggling with their laptops. Collect the hard copy essays as students finish, and

ensure they email you an electronic copy of their essays. Assess the essays using CGSC Form 1099W.

Provide the completed 1009W to the students by the Monday after the end of P910. Email a copy of all

the essays and 1009Ws to Mr. Brettmann in IMSD at the same time.

i. Assessment Plan: (See Appendix A.).

8. ENVIRONMENTAL IMPACT STATEMENT:None.

9. RISK ASSESSMENT/RISK CONTROL MEASURES:None.

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English Writing

Appendix AAssessment Plan

Part of the students overall performance for the complete P910 International Military Student

Preparatory Course is assessed in this lesson through the following:

Essay P/F

Daily AAR & Journal P/F

2. The student will write a 2 page essay on an assigned subject, in class. The essay will be graded as

pass/fail based on the standards expressed in the ELO for the lesson:

3. The students work will be assessed in accordance with the standards defined in ST 22-2:Writing and Speaking Skills for Senior Leaders. Regardless of the nature of the specific

requirement, the students demonstration of achieving an objective or competency is assessed

against the following performance criteria:

A Exceeded Standard. Represents the complete integration of critical reasoning, creative

thinking, and evaluative skills as the student achieves course-learning objectives. The student is

fluent in the logic of course content. There is abundant evidence of this integration in his/her

essay. Furthermore, he/she mastered the effective writing of an essay. The essay includes a

clearly stated thesis and analysis, its organization is suitable for the topic, it includes proper

documentation of research, and lastly it includes the correct use of the passive voice.

B Meets Standard. Represents the consistent application of critical reasoning skills asyou achieve course learning objectives. The student is competent in the application of course

content. There is frequent evidence of this application in his/her essay. Furthermore, he/she

displays a competence in his/her writing in that the majority of the following elements are present

in his/her essay:

A clearly stated thesis and analysis.

Organization suitable for the topic.

Proper documentation of research.

Correct use of the passive voice.

C Below Standard. Represents comprehension of course content, but you are inconsistentin application. The student achieves most, but not all, course learning objectives as evidenced in

his/her essay. Furthermore, he/she is not fully competent in the application of course content. The

student displays a lack of competence in his/her writing. Furthermore, the writing lacks the

majority of the following elements:





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U Unsatisfactory. Represents a consistent failure to achieve course learning objectives.

The student rarely, or minimally, demonstrates comprehension of course content and is not

competent in applying it to his/her essay. He/she is not competent in writing an effective essay.

The essay lacks:





See CGSC Form 1009W.

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ASSESSING WRITING

WRITER: DATE:

ASSIGNMENT/COURSE TITLE: P910 English Essay

INSTRUCTOR/DEPARTMENT:

ARMY STANDARD defines good writing as understandable in a single, rapid reading and generally

free of errors in grammar, mechanics, and usage.

GRADE: (CGSOC)

Pass__________ Fail____________

INSTRUCTOR COMMENTS:

5.1.1 Assesses environment (people, events, and systems) then tailors message to convince others to

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COGNITIVE LEVEL

ATTAINED

(Higher levels include

characteristics of lower

levels.)

EVALUATION

(Judging or weighing by

building and using

criteria and standards.)

SYNTHESIS

(Integrating parts into a

new whole.)

ANALYSIS (Breaking

material down into

component parts to

determine structures

and relationships.)

APPLICATION (Use of

knowledge to solve

problems.)COMPREHENSION

(Understanding of the

material.)

KNOWLEDGE (Recall

of specific information.)

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follow ideas and make a commitment

STUDENT COMMENTS:

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Writing Assignment

LO C.07

ction: Write an effective essay

ondition: As a CGSOC International Military Student and member of a staff group; given concrete experiences, ST22-2;

Writing Guides; and approved topic, and class discussion.

tandard: The Essay must include:

A clearly stated thesis

Clearly stated support and analysis

Organization suitable for the topic

Proper documentation of research

Correct use of passive voice

earning Level: Cognitive: Application

erformance Level

1 2 3 4 5

Assessment

Introduction

No stated purpose.Purpose for writing is vague or

not clearly stated.

Purpose for writing is clear and

specific.

No clear thesis.Thesis is not focused or not

relevant to the purpose.

Thesis is clearly stated and

focused.

No introduction of major points.Vague introduction of major

points.

Clear introduction of major

points that are relevant to the

thesis.

DEVELOPMENT

Major points do not support

thesis.Major points partially support

thesis.Major points fully support thesis.

Fails to consider multiple

viewpoints.

Presents other points of view but

does not reason through them.

Clearly and fairly discusses

multiple points of view.

Does not address implications or

consequences of the proposed

assertion (thesis).

Partially addresses implications

or consequences of the proposed

assertion (thesis).

Addresses implications or

consequences of the proposed

assertion (thesis).

Sequencing of major/minor

points does not support writers

purpose.


points partially supports writers

purpose.


points effectively supports

writers purpose.

Fails to show how evidence

supports main points/thesis.

Weak analysis of evidence to

show how it supports main

points/thesis.

Clear reasoning that shows how

evidence supports main

points/thesis.

Does not anticipate questions.Identifies but does not answer

anticipated questions.

Identifies and answers

anticipated questions.

Fallacies abound within the essay.Some fallacies exist within the

essay.Essay is free of fallacies.

No transitions. Transitions are not always clear.Transitions effectively connect

major/minor points.

CONCLUSION

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Student Instructor

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No conclusion or one that does

not support the thesis.

Conclusion partially supports

thesis.

Conclusion is clear and reinforces

thesis and major parts.

Conclusion is disconnected from

the evidence and reasoning, or it

introduces new ideas.

Conclusion is not strongly linked

to the evidence and reasoning, or

it is not concise.

Conclusion is fully justified by the

evidence and the reasoning, and it

is concise.

STYLEAND GRAMMARNumerous sentences that are

wordy and vague.

Some sentences are not always

clear.Clear, concise sentences.

Paragraphs contain sentences not

relevant to the topic.

Some paragraphs are confusing

or vague.

Clear, concise paragraphs that

include topic sentences.

Primarily passive voice.Some passive voice not

excessive.Primarily active voice.

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English Writing

Appendix BSlides

Slide Number Description/Title

Slide 1 Lesson Title

Slide 2 Job One

Slide 3 Why This Process and Format?

Slide 4 Class Time

Slide 5 What You Will Learn

Slide 6 What Is the Writing Process?

Slide 7 What is My Assignment?

Slide 8 How Can I Find Relevant Information?

Slide 9 How Can I Get ideas?

Slide 10 How Can I Choose a Purpose?

Slide 11 How Can I Write a Good Thesis Statement?

Slide 12 How Can I Write a Good Thesis Statement?

Slide 13 What is NOT a Good Thesis Statement?

Slide 14 What is the Format of An Essay?

Slide 15 What is An Introduction?

Slide 16 What is a Body?

Slide 17 What is a Conclusion?

Slide 18 How Can I Organize My Ideas Into a Plan?

Slide 19 How Can I Organize My Ideas Into a Plan?Slide 20 How Can I Check My Outline?

Slide 21 How Do I Write a Good Draft?

Slide 22 How Do I Check and Revise?

Slide 23 But English is Not My Native Language!!!

Slide 24 Can I Really Be A Good Writer?

Slide 25 The Ownership of Words and Ideas.

Slide 26 A Few Dos and Donts About Structure.

Slide 27 In Conclusion: The Process

Slide 28 The Parts of An Essay.

Slide 29 Any Questions?

Slide 30 Homework

Slide 31 Essay Writing Assignment.

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English Writing

Appendix C Thesis Statement Handout

The attached Thesis Statement Handout is to be distributed to the students after covering Slide 13 during

the GNI phase of the lesson. Allow the students time to review the handout, dealing with any questions

they may have. Tell them to keep the handout for reference during the various writing assignments they

will have at CGSOC.

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P910 English Writing

Example Essay Thesis Statements

A thesis must be

Clear a complete sentence

Specific not too general

Supportable with evidence

Strong not doubtful

Coherent does not mix different topics

Original includes the authors own idea

Military leadership is the act of persuading someone to agree with and act on an idea, even when that idea

may entail the greatest personal risk.

Good leaders all share certain basic characteristics, with personal example being the most important.

Leadership and management are two different things: leadership focuses on people and management

focuses on things.

Self-sacrifice is one of the central characteristics of every great leader.

Effective leadership in a military unit is a powerful combat multiplier, while ineffective leadership will

take the strongest organization down the path of failure.

In this essay I will discuss the three major lessons I have learned as an officer: respect must be earned,

learning does not stop when you leave a training institution, and command is not a popularity contest.

As leaders, the time we spend planning and preparing will reduce the uncertainties and hardships

associated with our missions.

One of the first lessons I learned as an army officer was that my skills as a leader had a direct, personal

influence on the soldiers I led, and they in turn had a direct personal influence on me as a commander.

Military officers carry leadership responsibilities that are almost unknown in civilian life: the success,

welfare, and the very lives of the soldiers we lead depend on the quality of the decisions we make and the

orders we give.

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Appendix D - Example Citation Handout

The attached Example Citation Handout is to be distributed to the students after covering Slide 13 during

the GNI phase of the lesson. Allow the students time to review the handout, dealing with any questions

they may have. Tell them to keep the handout for reference during the various writing assignments they

will have at CGSOC.

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Example Citation Handout

In the course of your time in CGSOC, you will be required to turn in a number of written papersof various types. Many of these papers will require you to include footnotes or bibliographies

citing the publications you used in researching the assignment. This handout covers examples offormats for citing the most common types of documents you will encounter. If you have any

questions concerning how or when to cite a source, ask your instructor.

The examples below show first the general format to be used for each type of document, andthen a specific example. You should note that when the format or example uses italic type, then

you should put that part of your citation in italics. Also, follow the punctuation styles shown in

the example between portions of the citation.

There are two main places where you must cite the sources for information: the bibliographywhere you will list all of the sources you used; and the footnotes (shown at the end of a page) orendnotes (shown at the end of a section, chapter or the paper), which is where you will cite the

source of specific information in your paper. The two types of citations use slightly different

formats.

In the bibliography, you will list all your sources in alphabetical order by the authors last name.

Footnotes or endnotes are numbered by the order in which they appear in the paper, and the

authors name is shown in normal (First name, Last name) order. You should also note that thetwo types of citations are indented a little differently, and that for a footnote or endnote you must

cite the specific page(s) where the information came from.

Book Use this format when citing information from a commercially published book.

FORMAT:

Author(s). Title of book. Placeof publication: Publisher. Date [pages]

BIBLIOGRAPHY EXAMPLE:

Okuda, Michael, and Denise Okuda. Star Trek chronology: Thehistory of the future. New York:

Pocket Books. 1993

FOOTNOTE EXAMPLE

1 Michael Okuda and Denise Okuda. Star Trek chronology: Thehistory of the future.New York: Pocket Books. 1993, p. 65

NOTE: When a book has more than one author, the lead authors name is listed as Last Name,

First Name and all other authors are listed in normal name order.

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Military Publication Use this format when citing information from a military or other government

publication

FORMAT:

Organization, specific office (if given), publication number, title, and page number(s).Proponent, location, date of manual.

BIBLIOGRPAHY EXAMPLE:

U.S. Department of the Army, Command and General Staff College, Student Text 22-2, Writing

and Speaking Skills for Senior Leaders, 3-2, 3-17. Fort Leavenworth, Kansas, 1998.

FOOTNOTE EXAMPLE1Department of the Army, U.S. Army Command and General Staff College. ST 22-2,

Writing and Speaking Skills for Senior Leaders (Fort Leavenworth, KS: USACGSC, August

1998), 2-5.

Journal Article Use this format when citing information from an article in an academic or professional

journal

FORMAT:

Author(s). Date. Title of Article. Title of PeriodicalVolume (Date): Pages.


Wilcox, Rhonda V. Shifting roles and synthetic women in StarTrek: The Next Generation.

Studies in Popular Culture 13 (June 1991): 53-65.

FOOTNOTE EXAMPLE1 Rhonda V. Wilcox. Shifting roles and synthetic women in StarTrek: The Next

Generation. Studies in Popular Culture 13 (June 1991): 53-65

Newspaper or Magazine Article Use this format when citing information from a newspaper or generalcirculation magazine.

FORMAT:

Author(s). Title of Article. Title of Periodical, Date, Pages.

BIBLIOGRPAHY EXAMPLE:

Di Rado, Alicia. Trekking through college: Classes explore modern society using the world of

Star Trek.Los Angeles Times,15 March 1995, A3.

FOOTNOTE EXAMPLE1 Alicia Di Rado. Trekking through college: Classes explore modern society using the

world of Star Trek.Los Angeles Times,15 March 1995, A3.

Book Article or Chapter Use this format when citing information from a book which is a collection of

individual articles or separate chapters by a number of authors, or on a number of separate

subjects by a single author.

FORMAT:

Author(s). Title of Article or Chapter. Title of Book, author/editor, pages. Place of publication:

Publisher. Date.

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James, Nancy E. ed.. Two sides of paradise: The Eden myth according to Kirk and Spock. In

Spectrum of the fantastic, 219-223. Westport, CT: Greenwood. 1988

FOOTNOTE EXAMPLE1Nancy E. James, ed. Two sides of paradise: The Eden myth according to Kirk and

Spock. Spectrum of the fantastic, 219-223. Westport, CT: Greenwood. 1988

Website Use this format when citing information from a book or publication you found on the internet.

Note that you must put the words [on-line] in brackets after the publications name. Microsoft Word is

programmed to recognize web addresses, known as Universal Resource Locators or URLs and will

automatically underline them. You must put all the punctuation in URLs for them to be usable.

FORMAT:

Author(s). Title of Book.[on-line]Place of Publication: Publisher; Date of publication, Date that

you accessed the information, Specific URL For the website

BIBLIOGRAPHY FORMAT

Lynch, Tim.DS9 Trials and Tribble-ations review [on-line]. Peoria, IL: Bradley University;

1996. Accessed 8 October 1997. Available from

http://www.bradley.edu/campusorg/psiphi/DS9/ep/503r.html

FOOTNOTE FORMAT

1Tim Lynch,DS9 Trials and Tribble-ations review [on-line]. Peoria, IL: Bradley

University; 1996. Accessed 8 October 1997. Available from

http://www.bradley.edu/campusorg/psiphi/DS9/ep/503r.html

Remember, if at any time you have questions about how or when to cite the source of information

in one of your papers, ask an instructor or another student for help.

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Appendix E - Example Essay Handout

The attached Example Essay Handout is to be distributed to the students at the end of the Develop phaseof the lesson. Allow the students time to review the handout, dealing with any questions they may have.

Tell them to keep the handout for reference during the various writing assignments they will have at

CGSOC.

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Example Essay Handout

This handout includes a sample IMSPC essay, written by a student from a previous year, along with anexample idea sheet, and an example outline. These documents are provided to help familiarize you with

the essay writing process. You should NOT use these documents in your own writing your work must

be your own. You should NOT start writing your essay based on this example the actual subject for this

years essay will not be assigned until tomorrow.

IDEA SHEET

The idea sheet is the product of a short brainstorming session on the subject of leaders. While this sheet

was composed and printed by computer, you can work by hand on paper, on a whiteboard or butcher

paper, or by any other method you are comfortable with. The important thing is to develop as many ideas

as you can on the subject in order to help you determine exactly what it is you want to write.

OUTLINE

The example outline illustrates how an author might lay out an essay. You should develop a similar

outline, supporting your own ideas, for your essay. You can use any numbering system you choose.Remember, this is a working document, so your outline may change as you write.

SAMPLE ESSAY

In the sample essay the three main elements, Introduction, Body, and Conclusion, have been boxed off

and labeled. It is not necessary for you to do that for your essay, but all three elements must be present.

As you read the essay, identify in your own mind the thesis statement, and for each paragraph in the body

of the essay, identify the main point in the paragraph, and the supporting arguments the author makes.

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EXAMPLE IDEA SHEET

Subject Leader

Officer Soldier Lead Follow

Respect Vision Competence Experience

Caring Disinterested Power Harsh Concerned

Influence Persuasion Born or made? Strength

Stamina Conviction Honesty Openness

Fairness Firmness Knowledge Listening

Communicating Personal example Self Sacrifice Courage

Determination Organized Inspiring Training Integrity

Guide Model Persuade Direct Involved

Weak Stupid Poorly trained Incompetent

Lazy Absent Frightened

This can be handwritten or done on the computer or a whiteboard. It can be freeform, as this

example is, or a list, or any other format you wish.

Note that not all the ideas on the sheet are positives. Sometimes negative ideas can be used to helpformulate concepts or to clearly express them. Contrasting a negative and a positive aspect of the

same idea can be an effective writing tool. Dont reject an idea simply because it is negative.

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SAMPLE OUTLINE

Thesis In this essay I will discuss three lessons that I learned which I have tried to follow throughout

my career.

Body:

A: Caring Leader1. Soldiers are the reason for leaders

2. Caring for soldiers is all-encompassing

3. Leaders make a difference

B. Lead by Example

1. Exercise example

2. Example inspired NCOs

3. Positive feedback

C. Meet conflict head-on

1. Personality conflict

2. Search for solution and good advice3. Resolution of conflict

Conclusion:

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SAMPLE ESSAY Put your name in the header on each page of your essay.

LESSONS I LEARNED IN MY FIRST MILITARY ASSIGNMENT

INTRODUCTION

Although the Canadian Infantry School does an excellent job of tactically preparing a young

officer for his first command, there is always a sense of apprehension upon taking command. Will I

measure up? Will they like me? Do I know what I am doing? These were the questions that were in the

back of my mind when I assumed command of my first platoon. The lessons I learned from my first

command are many and varied. In this essay I will discuss three lessons that I learned which I have tried

to follow throughout my career.

BODY

Infantry officers, unlike most other services, exist to lead soldiers. Without the soldier the

infantry officer would not be required, therefore taking care of soldiers has to be your primary concern.

This was the first lesson my Company Commander drilled into all his new Platoon Commanders. He did

not care how tactically competent we were (that would come with time), but he had no time for an

officer who did not care for the soldiers under his command. I quickly found myself embroiled in all

aspects of the lives of my Platoon members. I learned how important this was when I was thanked by a

soldier for some assistance I had given to his family on a personal matter. It was then that I realized that

my soldiers relied upon me for more than just orders, and I could make a difference in their lives.

The second lesson that I learned was to always lead by example. This lesson was particularly

brought home during my first Battalion Winter Exercise, in the harsh climate of Northern Canada. The

weather was extremely cold and we had been advancing on foot, into a storm, all day long. In extreme

conditions it is vital that soldiers maintain proper Winter Warfare discipline (which is difficult to do).

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Despite personal fatigue, whenever we stopped for a rest or tactical pause I made a point of moving up

and down the platoon lines ensuring my soldiers were hydrated, taking care of their feet, and enforcing

the buddy system. As a result of my checking, my NCOs also ensured the soldiers followed the proper

precautions and we had no injuries. I was later commended by my company commander for my conduct

on the exercise, as my platoon was the only one without cold weather injuries in the company.

The final lesson that I will discuss is one of meeting conflict head-on, regardless of how

unpleasant. Personality conflicts arise at some points in time, and this occurred with one of my Platoon

2ics. I had already been in command for one year when I received a new 2ic. Soon after his arrival I left

for a three month course, and upon my return I felt that he was trying to retain command of the platoon.

The situation had certainly affected our relationship, and it was having a negative reaction on the platoon.

After several months, and prior to a two month deployment, I discussed my problem with my Company

Sergeant Major. He advised me to tackle the problem head on. Despite feeling uncomfortable, I

confronted my 2ic and found (to my surprise) that he felt I was not supporting him properly. We

recognized our mutual problem, and set upon a solution to resolve our differences, setting out clear

expectations for each of us to follow. Although we never became personally close our professional

relationship improved considerably, for the benefit of the Platoon.

CONCLUSION

Throughout my career I have tried to follow the lessons I learned as a new Lieutenant. I consider

taking care of my soldiers, setting a good example, and dealing with adversity head on are good rules for

a leader to follow. These rules have served me well over the past 21 years, and will continue to do so.

Documents

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