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Deck from my talk on self-coaching and leadership at Kixeye, San Francisco, March 27, 2013. Learn more at www.edbatista.com.
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Self-coaching
Photo: Seth Anderson
& leadershipEd Batista, March 27, 2013www.edbatista.com/self-coaching.html
Who am I?
Photo: Seth Anderson
Executive coach
Instructor @ Stanford GSB
www.edbatista.com
Self-coaching
Leadership
Mindset
Practices
Goals
Change
Agenda
Photo: Theresa Thompson
Brief conceptual framing
Discuss with your partner
Format
Photo: Theresa Thompson
CoachingNOT consulting, advising or mentoring
Client owns the agenda
Client has the answers
Photo: Seth Anderson
99% of coaching = Self-coaching
91% of engagements < 18 months
High demand, limited resources
Self-coaching
Photo: Seth Anderson
Not a solitary experience
Coaching partners are essential
Start with your partner today
Self-coaching
Photo: Seth Anderson
Photo: Martin Fisch www.flickr.com/photos/marfis75/4074994941/
It rarely looks like this
Not a function of job title or role
A way of being with others
Leadership
Photo: xlibber
Work has changed
Organizations have changed
Leadership has to change
Leadership
Empowering others
Interpersonal skills
Emotional intelligence in action
Leadership
Photo: woodleywonderworks
LeadershipKey capabilities…
Self-awareness
Self-regulation
Managing relationships
Photo: woodleywonderworks
Photo: Ed Yourdon
Discuss in pairsGiven this model of leadership…
What are my strengths as a leader?
What are my weaknesses?
What do I want to work on?
Perspective on ourselves
Work in progress
Open to learning
Carol Dweck
Mindset
Photo: jm3
Talent & intelligence are inherent traits
Mistakes are failures or character flaws
Negative emotional response to mistakes
Talent & intelligence can be developed
Mistakes are learning opportunities
Pay close attention to mistakes & learn more
Fixed Growth
Mindset
Carol Dweck:
www.j.mp/dweck99
Photo: Renato Ganoza
Mental models matter
Stereotype threat
Perception shapes our experience
Mindset
Discuss in pairs
Photo: Keoni Cabral
How would a growth mindset help me?
What mental models might get in my
way?
Photo: Rollan Budi
Experiential learning
Coaching conversations
Reflection and journaling
Practices
Act
Reflect
Conceptualize
ApplyWhat will I do
the next time?
What do these results imply?
What conclusions can I draw?
What happened?
What resultedfrom my actions?
Experientiallearning
Act
What?
So What?
Now What?
Experientiallearning
More questions, less advice
How…? and What…? are better than
Why…?
Help us find our own answers
Coachingconversations
Photo: Ed Yourdon
Empathy = “the antidote to shame”
Listening vs. feeling heard
Learning & action
Coachingconversations
Photo: Ed Yourdon
Reflection
Photo: Alex Erde
Neuroscience of journaling
Memory of an experience
Emotional experiences
Non-emotional experiences
ReflectionNo right way
Natural & enjoyable
Valuable
Leverage situational factors
Avoid guilt
Photo: Alex Erde
Discuss in pairs
Photo: Ana Karenina
Who are my potential coaching
partners?
What would journaling look like for
me?
Photo: John Trainor
When we are…
Committed
Able
Unconflicted
…goals support performance
Goals
However…
Learning may trump performance
Threatening goals are counter-
productive
Goals may diminish motivation &
enjoyment
Goals
Photo: John Trainor
Effective goals…
Generate feedback
Heighten commitment
Don’t obscure the big picture
Goals
Photo: John Trainor
Photo: Erich Ferdinand
Accountable to ourselves, not the
coach
As a coach: Investment vs.
attachment
As a “coachee”: Get curious about
failure
Goals & coaching
Discuss in pairs
Photo: Andrew Yee
What is a current leadership goal of
mine?
How will this goal motivate me?
How might it get in my way?
Behavior is stable
Driving & restraining forces
Change requires “unfreezing”
Change
Photo: ezioman
Key driving force
“Survival anxiety”
I must change to achieve my goals
Change
Photo: ezioman
Key restraining force
“Learning anxiety”
Change threatens my self-esteem or identity
Change
Photo: ezioman
Photo: ezioman
Survival anxiety > Learning anxiety
Trigger some survival anxiety
Decrease learning anxiety
Change
Photo: ezioman
Growth mindset = Work in progress
Change is less threatening
New behavior ≠ New identity
Mistakes = Learning opportunities
Change& mindset
Conclusions
Photo: David Barrie
Self-coaching is possible…
…with the right mindset, partners and
practice
(Professional coaching helps, too)
Leadership is emotional intelligence in
action
Goals are powerful; use with care
Change requires comfort with
discomfort
www.edbatista.comPhoto Credits:Lifeguard Chairs by Seth Anderson, www.flickr.com/photos/swanksalot/4215424034/ Compass by Theresa Thompson, www.flickr.com/photos/theresasthompson/7163227255/ Marcus Aurelius by Martin Fisch, www.flickr.com/photos/marfis75/4074994941/Typewriter by xlibber, www.flickr.com/photos/xlibber/4855182596/ Soccer Practice by woodleywonderworks, www.flickr.com/photos/wwworks/1384952210/ Discussion # 1 by Ed Yourdon, www.flickr.com/photos/yourdon/2574628438/ Traffic Cones by jm3, www.flickr.com/photos/jm3/2644059971/ Girl in Classroom by Renato Ganoza, www.flickr.com/photos/rzganoza/4186516481/ Discussion # 2 by Keoni Cabral, www.flickr.com/photos/keoni101/5946530725/ Golf Swing by Rollan Budi, www.flickr.com/photos/rollanb/2972392183/Coaching Conversations by Ed Yourdon, www.flickr.com/photos/yourdon/4159766506/ Journaling by Alex Erde, www.flickr.com/photos/alexerde/2253263970/ Discussion # 3 by Ana Karenina, http://www.flickr.com/photos/anakarenina/2328103845/Archer by John Trainor, www.flickr.com/photos/trainor/2902023575/ Conversation by Erich Ferdinand, www.flickr.com/photos/erix/4122236130/ Discussion # 4 by Andrew Yee, www.flickr.com/photos/halfchinese/167535372/ Icebreaker by ezioman, www.flickr.com/photos/ezioman/2096480108/ Garden by David Barrie, www.flickr.com/photos/addictive_picasso/2478673625/