Formal WritingYear 9

By Christine

Wells Adapted by Gill Taylor

What is Formal Writing?• Formal writing can be: • A letter to the editor • A formal essay • A newspaper article • A film or book review • A report

The purpose…• The purpose of formal writing is to express an

opinion on an issue or to inform. It also lets other people know what you are thinking and can stimulate debate.

The rules!• No slang or colloquial expressions • No contractions e.g it’s should be it is • Spelling must be perfect • Use correct punctuation • Write in the 3rd person e.g. he, she, they • Don’t overuse the 1st person e.g I think… • Numbers ten and under should be written in

full.

Features of Formal writing• Formal writing is written using formal language

– as if you were speaking to the Queen, not your mates!

Task A - do in class.

Rewrite the following paragraph, replacing the informal language with formal language.

I decided to research ‘boy racers’ in auckland. my friends are boy and girl racers although they don’t like to be labled in that category. i’m interested to no some different views on this subject which seems to have alot of attention. it was alot different in year’s gone by. car are alot more powerful than they were 20 years ago.

Task A - Answers

I decided to research ‘boy racers’ in Auckland. My friends are boy and girl racers, although they do not like to be labelled in that category. I am interested to know some different views on this subject, which seems to have a lot of attention. It was very different in years gone by. Cars are more powerful than they were 20 years ago.

Year 9: ISRAEL• Imperative - an order which helps the reader understand

the importance of what you are saying. • Statistics - numbers taken from research that give weight

and help support your point. • Rhetorical question - a question that does not require an

answer but just some thought. • Anecdotes - stories or a personal experience that

illustrates the point you are making. • Examples - quotes or the description of an event which

supports what you are writing about. • Listing - a list of numbers or items.

Task B

1. Grab a magazine and find an example of each of the following:

•Imperative - an order which helps the reader understand the importance of what you are saying.

•Statistics - numbers taken from research that give weight and help support your point.

•Rhetorical question - a question that does not require an answer but just some thought.

•Anecdotes - stories or a personal experience that illustrates the point you are making.

•Examples - quotes or the description of an event which supports what you are writing about.

•Listing - a list of numbers or items.

2. Cut each one out, glue it into your book and label it clearly.

For smaller boats, the decision of one outboard versus two usually reflects each owner's specific requirements.ADDING UPIn general terms, the more engines you have, the more expensive and complex the installation becomes.Twin engines usually means two sets of gauges.That said, twin rigs, the most common multiple engine installation in New Zealand, aren't particularly complicated to fit and don't usually need expensive specialised control systems, since most outboard manufacturers offer standard twin-engine controls.However, control systems have become more sophisticated, with single trim buttons to operate the trim on both engines, fuel gauges that measure combined fuel consumption for both engines, interlinked engine computers and in some cases the ability to steer the engines independently of one another at manoeuvring speed. Consequently, rigging twin engines is reasonably technical and requires specialist knowledge. It also takes longer. Ongoing service costs for twin engines are higher than for a single, since there are two engines to maintain and more technology to go wrong, so the boatie needs to balance the benefits of twin engines against the extra cost. Usually though, it's not necessarily twice as expensive to service two engines as it is to service one, since with twins you are likely dealing with eight cylinders and their valve trains as opposed to six cylinders and a valve train on a single installation. Smaller engines also require less oil, so on balance servicing twin outboards costs only about 50% more than servicing a single outboard. Servicing aside, the purchase price difference between a single engine and twin engines of equivalent horsepower is relatively slight. If you add an auxiliary engine to your single installation, as a trolling motor or just as safety back-up, the cost difference is negligible. A single outboard plus a suitable four-stroke auxiliary costs about the same overall as twin engines of similar horsepower. BUT WEIGHT, THERE'S MORE Weight is another consideration. Even though outboards, especially four-strokes, are getting lighter with each new model, two 150hp engines are heavier than one 300hp, sometimes by quite a margin. The weight difference varies between engine brands and horsepowers and between four-cylinder and six or eight-cylinder engines. Extra weight has implications for the boat's balance and handling, while the extra space required by two engines on the transom may necessitate modifications to the boat's structure. However, with today's lightweight outboards, a twin rig's total weight on the transom is no longer the issue it was 10 or 15 years ago. SACRIFICING SPEED There is a speed penalty to pay with multiple outboards, too. Because the surface area of two lower units is greater than the surface area of one, there's more drag through the water, reducing top speed. Depending on the engine brand and leg design, a 200hp leg will typically be about 20-30% greater in surface area than a 100hp leg, but considerably less in total area than two 100hp legs. A single rig creates less drag which translates into a faster boat. To achieve the same top speed with twins as with a single outboard, you need slightly higher horsepower to overcome the extra weight and drag: say a pair of 115hp outboards to match a single 200hp, depending on the engines used. Boat manufacturers recommend twin outboards of sufficient power that one engine can easily plane the boat by itself – depending on the load. For example, the boat may plane on one engine with only two or three people onboard, but would struggle to plane with a greater load. US boatbuilder Boston Whaler advises meeting the maximum recommended horsepower rating for the boat when rigging two or more engines to ensure optimum performance. For best performance and handling, twin installations should have counter-rotating propellers to eliminate torque steer and a tendency for the boat to lie over on one side under acceleration. Until recently it was quite common to rig twin engines without counter-rotating propellers, especially with smaller horsepower outboards, toeing one engine in slightly to counteract torque steer. However, counter-rotating is best and all the major players now offer left or right-hand rotating versions of their bigger engines to meet the demands of twin-rigging.  FUEL ECONOMY In theory, extra drag should impact on fuel economy as well, but there is often little difference between twin or single installations of equivalent total horsepower. Fuel consumption between engines of the same vintage, technology and total horsepower is about the same for twin or single outboard installations because it takes a certain amount of fuel, or energy, to move a boat through the water. In some situations – trout trolling, traversing no-wake zones, or drift fishing at idle where it's prudent to leave the engine running – one engine (continued on slide 11)

can be shut down to save fuel. DOING THE QUICK-STEPA major advantage of a twin installation comes in manoeuvrability: for close-quarters operation, docking, steering and control in big seas, twins have the edge. Two legs and propellers in the water provide better control than one, and many boats equipped with twins seem to ride better too, perhaps because of extra weight at the stern.Some modern high-tech steering systems for multiple outboard installations offer unprecedented directional control at low speed by allowing the outboards to steer independently of one another, which is impossible to replicate with a single outboard. Even standard installations allow the operator to run one motor in reverse and one going ahead for superior control dockside.SAFETY: PLAN BPerhaps the most common justification for fitting twin outboards is safety. If one engine fails for any reason, the other will get you home. If the motors are big enough for the task, you may even get back on the plane at good speed without excessive fuel use.For charter boats, commercial vessels and boats that operate offshore or in remote areas, twin rigs make a lot of sense. In South Africa, trailer boats that travel more than five miles offshore must have two outboards and be able to plane on just one, so the authorities there obviously acknowledge the safety benefits of twin installations.In many boating situations, a suitable auxiliary will get you home safely should the primary engine have problems – provided the auxiliary works.The maintenance regime of auxiliary engines is often neglected; they may not even be started for several years and then refuse to go when they are needed in an emergency. This is especially true of auxiliary motors that spend their lives lying on their sides somewhere up in the bows. Auxiliaries on transom brackets get in the way when fishing, can be difficult to secure properly when the sea is rough and many boaters consider them ugly too, so despite their safety credentials they are less popular than they used to be.But perhaps the main reason most boaters no longer consider an auxiliary essential is because modern outboards have become so reliable. Many boat owners never experience any problems with their outboards, particularly if they service them regularly.Breakdowns are rare and most new outboards have 'limp home' modes that reduce power when there is a mechanical issue, but still allow the skipper to get home, albeit at reduced speed. CONCLUSIONFor boats plying busy recreational waters like the Hauraki Gulf, there's less reason to fit twin engines or even an auxiliary, but if you regularly travel well offshore or fish and dive along an exposed, isolated coast, the security and other benefits of twin engines may well justify the higher initial outlay and ongoing service costs.  

TWIN OUTBOARD  Pros                                                                 Cons*safety/redundancy                                            * purchase price*superior low-speed manoeuvrability                 * service costs*superior control in reverse                                * more to go wrong*superior control in a seaway                             * speed penalty*faster hole shots                                                * weight penalty*better trout trolling                                              * need for counter-rotation*can run on one engine                                        *take up more room on transom*no trim tabs required

SINGLE OUTBOARD Pros                                                                 Cons    *one engine cheaper than two                            *no redundancy*simpler/cheaper to rig                                        *extra cost of auxiliary for safety*less to go wrong                                                *inferior control in reverse*cheaper to service                                             *inferior low-speed manoeuvrability*higher top speed                                                *may need trim tabs*lighter                                                                 *takes longer to plane*uses marginally less fuel

Task C

•Identify 4 persuasive writing techniques that have been used in the following letter. (Use the Formal Writing ISRAEL acronym to help you if you are stuck.)

Screaming Children Is there some new movement among childcare personnel to encourage young children to scream, squeal or shout very loudly anywhere, any time? This must be so because it is impossible to escape this unprovoked, meaningless, and distressing racket that appears to be not only permitted but encouraged by parents, ignoring the unpleasant effect on others. It is particularly noticeable in supermarkets where there is an almost constant cacophony of sounds that make one believe some little one is in dire distress. Parents, it is rude. To those who have ear problems or perhaps a headache, it is extremely unpleasant. It is also an abuse of the rights of others to shop in peace, and it is teaching children to be inconsiderate and disrespectful of the right of others to what the law terms “quiet enjoyment” of one’s activities.

Answers: Rhetorical Question, Example, Listing, Short Sentence

Emotive languageEmotive language is the use of language or words that create an emotional response in the reader. These are words such as amazing, terrifying, awesome, frightening… These words are effective because if the reader feels some sort of emotion then they are more likely to be driven towards taking action. So the use of emotive words can mobilise people into supporting or protesting against an issue.

Task D - a class task• Rewrite the following paragraph using

emotive language to make it more persuasive.

Ontario is a good place to visit. It is a massive province with many tourist attractions. You can see huge waterfalls at Niagara Falls. Or you can walk through Toronto and look at large skyscrapers. If you like to excitement, you can take all the thrilling rides at Canada’s Wonderland or grove to a live concert at Ontario Place. Ontario even has a superior Science Centre. Whatever you love to do, it’s available in Ontario!

Task D - Answers Ontario is a terrific place to visit. It is a massive province with hundreds of tourist attractions. You can watch gigantic waterfalls at Niagara Falls. Or you can stroll through Toronto and gaze at towering large skyscrapers. If you prefer to have excitement, you can experience all the thrilling rides at Canada’s Wonderland or groove to a live concert at Ontario Place. Ontario even has a superior Science Centre. Whatever you love to do, it’s offered in Ontario!

The importance of evidenceEvidence is information that is used to add weight and support to your argument. “That which tends to prove or disprove something; ground for belief; proof.”

It can take the form of facts, statistics, anecdotes or quotes.

When you make a statement or voice your opinion on an issue you will often be asked why you think the way you do. You need to prove your point. This is why evidence is so important.

It is hard to argue with solid proof or evidence.

Task E

•Identify an imperative, the use of evidence and repetition in the following paragraphs.

Council on climate change The European Union intends to place tariffs on imports to Europe from 2011 to offset the carbon footprints of those imports. While the move is aimed at the United States, China and India, New Zealand will get hurt if it does not address its carbon footprint. So, what can we do?

Buy local produce. Carpool or ride a bike to work. Recycle used clothing. Everyone will have to do their bit.

Statements: More Examples

• iPads and iPods should be part of the modern day classroom. 1. what is the reason for this statement 2. why do you think that this is a good idea 3. how do you think that this will effect the students and teachers

7. who do u think that this will efect the most 8. when do you think that this will go into action in the classroom

Task F - Research questions

•Once you have chosen your statement, write down 3-5 questions about it that you would like to find answers for.

•5 Ws and H •Your questions should be open ended. For example: What kinds of things should our parents be role modeling to their children? Or

What are some of the actions we could take to make our environment clean and green?

Spelling, punctuation, capitals, and contractions.It is important that the reader is not distracted by mistakes in your writing. Mistakes will detract from your argument. Instead of focusing on the points you are making, the reader will be forced to keep re-reading to try and make sense of your writing. To avoid this, check, double check and even triple check that your work is error free.

Task G: another class task - Find 4 spelling mistakes and 5 punctuation errors in the following paragraph.

Minor sporting codes are also effected by the almighty dollar. Early in 2003 the New Zealand Mens Underwater H o c k e y t e a m t o o k o u t s i l v e r i n t h e W o r l d Championships. But did we see that on the news. No. The New Zealand Mens Underwater Hockey team is not even nationally reconise, nd its members are certainly not paid. They had to raise the funds themselves in order to get to Canada and represent there country. They are not paid thousands of dollars a year, they still have to go to work and earn a living. The hours of training and the demands of the sport are truly for the love of it. Compare this, to our Americas Cup Bid. Again the inequity is highlighted by the dollars attached to the code, or lack of dollars as the case may be.

ANSWERSMinor sporting codes are also affected by the almighty dollar. Early in 2003 the New Zealand Men’s Underwater Hockey team took out silver in the World Championships. But did we see that on the news? No. The New Zealand Men’s Underwater Hockey team is not even nationally recognised and its members are certainly not paid. They had to raise the funds themselves in order to get to Canada and represent their country. They are not paid thousands of dollars a year, they still have to go to work and earn a living. The hours of training and the demands of the sport are truly for the love of it. Compare this to our America’s Cup Bid. Again the inequity is highlighted by the dollars attached to the code, or lack of dollars as the case may be.

Spelling Test # 1 - Work in pairs1. Acceptable 2. Accidentally 3. Conscience 4. Definitely 5. Experience 6. Noticeable 7. Principal 8. Recommend

9. Their (The students rose silently, collected their belongings and left forever.) 10. Weird 11. Villain 12. Referred 13. Occurred 14. Among 15. Awkward

Task H - Brainstorm• Do you agree or disagree with the statement you

have chosen? Give 3 reasons why.

Why?

Essay Structure

• Introduction • Paragraph 1 • Para 2 • Para 3 • Conclusion

Paragraph Structure• Statement • Example • eXplanation • Your response

• Point • Explain • Example (quote) • Link (to statement)

OR

Paragraph 1 Paragraph 2 Paragraph 3 Statement- Main idea

Example- What is an example from real life that supports the point you are making?

Explanation- How does this example prove the point you are making?

Your response- Why is this important? What can we learn from it?

Affect vs EffectAffect

•Affect with an a means "to influence," as in, "The arrows affected Ardvark," or "The rain affected Amy's hairdo." Affect can also mean, roughly, "to act in a way that you don't feel," as in, "She affected an air of superiority."   Effect

•Effect with an e has a lot of subtle meanings as a noun, but to me the meaning "a result" seems to be at the core of all the definitions. For example, you can say, "The effect was eye-popping," or "The sound effects were amazing," or "The rain had no effect on Amy's hairdo.“

Source: www.grammar.quickanddirtytricks.com aka grammar girl

Spelling Test #2 - Test each other1. Always 2. Profession 3. Knowledge 4. Embarrass 5. Necessary 6. Succeed 7. Beginning 8. Independence 9. Privilege

10. No one 11. Prejudice 12. Sincerely 13. Business 14. Probably 15. Separate

Task J - Common ErrorsRewrite the sentence in your book and choose the appropriate word (or spelling) to fill in the gap.

1. These trousers I bought are a bit ____. (lose/loose)

2. Could you _____ us on the best way to proceed? (advise/advice)

3. He walked straight _____ me. (past/passed) 4. Don’t ____ those keys, or you won’t be able

to get in. (lose/loose) 5. She said she ____ in later on. (maybe/may

be) 6. It was ____difficult to find a hotel room.

(quite/quiet)

Introduction

Your introduction should:

1.State whether you agree/disagree with the statement and include all of your statement sentences. For example, I believe that cellphones have become addictive because…

2. Include a rhetorical question at the end.

Conclusion

Your conclusion should: • answer the question • include your 3 main points( statement sentences) • a summary of what we can learn/ what was

important or significant. • Finish with an imperative.

Task K - More common errors

1. Jack is going to _____some money to help us get home. (lend/borrow)

2. _____ coat is this? (whose/who’s) 3. _____ driving us home? (whose/who’s) 4. The cupboard is ____. (bear/bare) 5. I’m pleased to say the changes don’t ____ us.

(affect/effect) 6. If you are going to make the team, you must

____ hard. (practise/practice) 7. Jaimee ______ her phone number on a

piece of paper and gave it to Matthew. (writ/wrote)

Task L - When does y become i? Below are 14 words. In your notebook, make two columns –one for words that keep ‘y’ on the end and the other for words that change to ‘i’ in the plural form, or past tense.

Hurry buy play obey enjoy toy easy display story marry happy spy say try

Task M – make nouns

dDescribe explain Know begin separate

Act create Compare discuss predict