Perseverance to Triumph

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Perseverance

Tell ya what I’m gonna tell Dynamics to perseverance 6 things resilient people do Share the adventure Take action !!

Dynamics to Perseverance

Perseverance is… a process ofchoices and actions, not a personality trait.

Not just muddling through bounce back persist & endure achieve success be better for it

More than inconvenience unexpected

unwanted unpleasant unsettling unlucky

unhappy unprepared uncharted unrelenting unimagined

Considering these dynamics, write a brief description of a real-life challenge, you now wish to overcome…

Take Action:

Note to self…

In Summary

1 Grow as a choice 2 Stare down hard reality 3 Find higher meaning 4 Help fellow sufferers 5 Visualize the extraordinary 6 Take specific action

6 things resilient people do

# 1: Grow as a choiceWe do NOT control external world

All other people Time & events Economics Weather & seasons Harm & illness Hitting lottery World ignorance

# 1: Grow as a choiceWe DO control internal self

Reaction to others Own behavior Personal beliefs Plans (not outcomes) Our preferences Chosen priorities Own decisions

# 1: Grow as a choiceWe CAN influence external world

Influence by…convictionknowledge persuasionpassionexamplenever by force*

# 1: Grow as a Choice

Rules of influence It is ineffective to focus on

things we do not control External focus decreases

our ability to influence Internal focus increases it

# 1: Grow as a choiceChange you; change the world

Take Action:Write two lists concerning your current challenge:

I do NOT Control

I DO Control

• That I’m deaf now• I am unemployed• Job market• Bias not to hire deaf• Technology limits

• How I communicate • How I do job search• Asking for help • My personal integrity• Learning new skills

# 1: Grow as a choice

# 2: Stare down hard reality

Face it, you gotta face it!A. Avoid optimism trap

B. Inventory cold hard factsC. Grieve with passionD. Ask for specific help

A.)Avoid optimism trap Hard-wired optimism*

is denial in disguise*People hugely underestimate chances of getting divorced, losing a job and being diagnosed ill while overestimating personal achievement, family fortune and life span.

-Time Magazine: The Science of Optimism

B.) Inventory hard factsI lost all hearing; it’s permanent

Miss my children’s voicesGet exponentially less informationI feel isolated; talk to less peopleInterpreting visual cues is exhaustingLip reading seems impossibleGetting a job is far more difficultYearn for sounds of music, nature, etc.Depleting all my money

C.) Grieve with passion Holding back is unhealthy

Pain shared helps all Allow the process* *Sadness, anger and depression are sane reactions to great loss. Grieving is a healthy process with stages that should be experienced, not denied.

- Coping with Grief and Loss: HelpGuide.org

D.) Ask for specific help Admit it (acceptance)

Do not assume they know Show exactly what to do Never beg or apologize Praise their efforts

Take Action:List all hard facts; select one item and describe how others can help:

33# 2: Stare down hard reality

# 3: Find a higher meaning

Believe pain means more

# 3: Find a higher meaning

Well, at least… Nature is more vivid My eye sight has improved I have greater insight into others I comprehend more with captions I made new friends who get it I’m inspired by others’ feedback I am better at sharing my heart I’m more connected with my kids

Take Action:Write your own list of lessons learned or other positive outcomes that resulted from your difficulty.

Caution: List only firm convictions, facts or actual events. This is not a wish list or ambiguous hope that something good will come. It must be real.

44# 3: Find a higher meaning

# 4: Help fellow suffers

If in doubt, help others Motivates to find solutions

Gets you out of own head Increases network Feels better about self Gives perspective (happy I’m me!)

# 5: Visualize the extraordinary

Nothing heals as vision!Visualize triumph

by imagining a specific scene of hardship overcome

# 5: Visualize the extraordinary

Nothing heals as vision!

Take Action:Imagine your specific scene. Write it down and replay it over & over.

Caution: Do not dream the physically impossible. Do not envision a “cure” to your current plight, (e.g. I will always be deaf).

55# 5: Visualize the extraordinary

# 6: Take specific action

Nothing happens if it doesn’t Memorized Sarah’s speech

Wrote daughters a poem Started new blog Took sign language classes Contacted HLAA / ALDA Dusted off telescope Started networking Obtained great job references Created this

presentation!

Take Action:Write your own list of actions that you can do right now or presently to either deal with your problem or move toward your vision. Note: Include on your list to complete the exercises suggested during this training.

66# 6: Take specific action

In Summary

1 Grow as a choice 2 Stare down hard reality 3 Find higher meaning 4 Help fellow sufferers 5 Visualize the extraordinary 6 Take specific action

6 things resilient people do

In Summary

Change you; change the worldFace it, you gotta face it!

Grieve with passionNothing heals as vision

BPJ quotes to summarize

In Summary

Visualize the extraordinary!

If in doubt, help others

Nothing happens if it doesn’t

BPJ quotes on key points

In Summary

Simply believe that hurt means more.

BPJ quote that sums it up

In Summary

briefly describe the challenge list what you control and not write how others can help list lessons learned by suffers describe extraordinary scene list your “To Do” action items

Exercises so you take action

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Thank You! Be Inspired!

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